bit of a verbal gaff, a blooper, if you will. jim. >> thank you to everyone who works on the show to make it possible. >> boing! >> huh-uh. i don't know what i was thinking. because i am the only one who does this show. i meant to thank myself, but in the excitement i blanked on the word me and accidentally thanked other people. well, i want to straighten that out right now. i am the one who achieved this without the help of any of these incredibly talented and attractive people. [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: of course, as mother theresa once said it is not enough to win, others must lose. in our victory sunday night was made that much sweeter when you consider who we vanquished. >> the colbert report snapped a decade long winning streak which had belonged to jon stewart and

the daily show. >> it is true, folks, i am the jon stewart's ten year reign of terror. good girl, monkey paw. good girl. >> well, the only thing i have to do right now is to give jon a call and wish him a sincere bite me. >> hello, stephen. [ cheers and applause ] >> jon stewart! >> stephen: i won! i won, jon! in your face!

>> stephen colbert -- i couldn't be happier for you. [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: no, no, no. no, jon, no. you are not! >> your historic streak has been snapped by me! >> that's fine. i feel great. i love and respect you. i have unbelievable admiration for everybody who works here. you guys are awesome. i just stopped by to congratulate you. >> stephen: well, maybe so. that that's fine, but what about your staff, they have to be crying in their cups. >> you know we don't give them cups. you saw them at the emmys when you guys won they jumped out of their chairs, they are genuinely, everyone at the show is genuinely, just happy for you guys, i they couldn't be prouder to be around you guys. i don't know. >> stephen: but i beat you.

>> i mean, yeah, you beat us, but i mean we are friend and colleagues and you are the emergency contact on my gym membership. i mean -- >> stephen: jon, why can't you just be upset, okay? i mean, really? it is really important to me that i have crushed you. >> well, i mean, if my being upset about, you know, breaking the ten year winning streak would make you happy, i -- i -- i would do it. >> stephen: you would? >> i would. but i can't because i am an executive producer on your show so i win again mother (bleep) cl!>> stephen: damn you, jon stewart! damn you! damn you!

damn you! damn you! [ cheers and applause ] >> seriously, if i do get hurt at the gym i am calling you. >> stephen: absolutely, please do. whoo! jon stewart, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: folks, speaking of golden idols the catholic church, mason, as you know i am tv's foremost catholic and i take my faith very seriously, jesus is not only my copilot, sometimes i let him drive, unfortunately, folks, unfortunately, i have had it up to here, here with our new pope.

he is washing the feet of criminals, saying atheists can be redeemed, not judging the gays, and saying w we can't sere god and money at the same time. oh, yes, we can. and at this point what is the difference? our money has in god we trust on it and i am assuming god has a tramp stamp that says a dolla makes me holla! but now the pope has given an exhaustive interview initiated by the jesuit magazine america which was filled with papal bombshells. >> the pope speaking out about some of the oldest staunchest traditions in the roman catholic church, we are talking about the acceptance of gays and lesbians, embracing prominent roles for women in the church and how about contraception and abortion? >> pope francis spoke with the jesuit magazine called america. >> he said in his first extended published interview that the church has become, quote, obsessed with preaching about gays and abortion and

contraception. >> >> stephen: really? obsessed with gays? don't flatter yourself, gays. if anyone is obsessed with the gays, it is the gays. they are the ones who are all gay for themselves. and get how the so-called vicar of christ justifies his position saying, the proclamation of the saving love of god comes before moral and religious imper i was the. >> oh, love before rules? like the best part of the catholicism is the ruling keeping, it is the scorecard for getting into heaven plus i get to tell people they are going to hell when they screw up. >> i know jesus says judge not or you will be judged, that's why i judge people for judging me. >> now we are stuck with pope kumbaya here. well, folks, we don't have to take this sitting down, then standing up and kneeling and then standing up again. there is one person in this world with the moral authority to reprimand the infallible

bishop of rome, me, stephen colbert. as archbishop of the colbert nation -- [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: ladies and gentlemen, i believe that i have no choice, boys, bring out the on notice board. oh, oh. this is happening. okay. let's see here. let's see here. i have ponies, porpoises, palindromes, a man, a plan, a canal, panama, all right, here we go, pope francis. all right. okay. jorge bergoglio, stick this in your centser, sensor and smoke it, boom, right there! oh, that has to sting worse than the 1054, here is the answer for the pope himself. it is a man who -- it is the man

-- it is the man who suggested this interview, editor at large of america magazine and chaplain of the colbert nation, father jim martin. thank you so much. now you are the one that got the ball rolling, right because the jesuits should interview a jesuit pope. >> it was a team effort, like this show. what? >> okay. this thing is absolutely causing a seismic ripple throughout the world of catholicism. this guy seems like he is saying love is more important than the rules. do you think that is what he is saying?. he is saying that and that's what jesus was saying as well. so he is basically sort of embodying and just emulating the teachings of jesus and kind of reminding us of what is important in the church and it is not rules it is the person. >> then why don't we just become he piss copailians at this point and turn the church into a community center and play basketball. >> this is like a los leader for the church, it is like the

summertime .. we are selling 11 cents a pound watermelons which gets them in the door and then boom, we hit them was $6.99 granola, except the watermelon is love and granola is the rules. >> well she getting people in the door, people have been telling me they are coming back to the church as a result of him and also this interview specifically. >> i was just in rome and you -- st. peter's was packed, you could not swing a cat over there without somebody sprinkling it with holy water. okay. >> he got rid of like the popemobile, right? >> yeah, he drives -- he drives himself -- >> that is hell on earth. >> the guys on car talk -- >> the power of prayer. >> what the sort of more conservative --

>> i am catholic, you are catholic. one of the great things about being a catholic -- benedict, was that you could get in a fight, a political fight over social issues with another catholic and say hey you know who is on my sigh, the pope he is my wing man and the pope has a great wing man because his wing man is jesus. >> but i can't say this. he is telling me not to use, you know, talking about abortion or contraception or gay marriage and the divisive issues. >> well he is not saying those things are not important -- >> not as focused on, which are love, passion, mercy. >> still accuse my fellow catholics of not being true catholics if they disagree with the pope on these issues? >> you can but jesus doesn't want you to judge so there is another person you have to answer to. >> stephen: hmm. i see that. >> father jim. thank you so much. we will be right )p

>> stephen: welcome back, everybody. my guest tonights are going to be loud, so deal with it, grandpa! please welcome metallica! [ cheers and applause ] great to see you guys. are you ready to do this? all right, all right. okay.

lars, james, robert, kirk, good to see you. thanks for having us. >> stephen: the few people on the planet who do not know this you are one of the most influential rock bands in history, you sold 110 million albums worldwide, nine grammy awards, rock 'n' roll hall of famers, new 3-d movie called at allica through the never. now, now, what does that mean? what is that exactly. >> why not nex next to the snawz under the sometimes? what does that mean? >> we went to russia for a premiere and in russia it is called through the impossible. so that was the -- >> stephen: i like that. that is like a david copperfield show. >> it is a whole other level. >> stephen: are you actually angry when you rock?

>> he is. >> are you angry when you rock? >> i am (bleep), bro. >> stephen: anybody else? because i like anger. i like the album cover. i haven't heard the album, but i love the album of the fist, that is my patron st., st. anger, do you have to be age bring the to rock as hard as you do? lars? >> it helps. especially when you are younger, as you get a little older as you can tell -- >> stephen: can you keep your anger up, james? [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: do you need anger viagra? do you have to fake your anger-gasm. >> we are still working on growing up on the inside so it is still there. >> stephen: you just drop some of that t gel, testosterone,

keeps you rocking. what i like about it is the music comes so fast and hard i feel like i should be wearing a cup when i listen to it, because you just -- you put your balls right in the music. robert -- really? does your dad run a pawnshop? >> that is one requirement to get into this band. >> stephen: now you guys don't do tv that often. when was the last time you rocked on the tv? >> saturday night live, 100 years ago or something. >> stephen: bill murray and the whole thing with the black face. there is a little clip here from always the -- on top of it.

>> stephen: whoo! [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: i love how easy the transition is between post apocalyptic mayhem and the front row of your concert. are you ready to rock out with your (bleep) fans? [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: we will be right

>> stephen: ladies and gentlemen, metallica!

♪ ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ make his fight on the hill in the early day ♪ constant chill deep inside ♪ shouting gun on they run ♪ through the endless grey on they fight ♪ are they right yes, but who's to say? ♪ for a hill men would kill why?

♪ they do not know stiffened wounds ♪ test their pride men of five ♪ still alive through the raging glow ♪ gone insane from the pain that they surely know ♪ for whom the bell tolls time marches on ♪ for whom the bell tolls ♪ ♪ take a look to the sky just before you die ♪ it's the last time he will ♪ blackened roar massive roar ♪ fills the crumbling sky shattered goal ♪ fills his soul with a ruthless cry ♪ stranger now are his eyes to this mystery

♪ he hears the silence so loud crack of dawn ♪ all is gone except the will to be ♪ now they see what will be blinded eyes to see ♪ for whom the bell tolls time marches on for whom the bell tolls. ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause ) ( cheers and applause )

thank you, we will be right ///

>> stephen: goo captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> september 24, 2013 from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show". my name is jon stewart. coming upton today's show -- coming up on today's show

richard talkins will be joining us. -- dawkins will be joining us. i have one regret about the emmys. i have one regret about the emmys on sunday night and that is that i was unable to attend and share in the joy for my friend stephen colbert and those at the court "the colbert reporo won a long served well overdue emmy. i have been in awe of that show from episode one. i believe stephen and everyone there has created something that has never before been seen on television and things happen on that show that could only happen on that show and they are remarkable. to my staff and crew, here is the best thing about my staff and crew it's not about -- win or lose, it doesn't matter. you know i saw newhart on stage, if anybody sou