tv The Colbert Report Comedy Central March 26, 2014 9:30am-10:01am PDT
9:30 am
9:31 am
if you're just tuning in to our program already in progress, you are here on an historic nightkne 39th president of the united states. jimmy carter. [ cheers and applause ] of course, this is not my first presidential rodeo. i sat down for a one-on-one with president obama and 500 guests at a state dinner. i made a science project with bill clinton. on several occasions, i put george washington into a vending machine. and while touring the nation's capital, i even sat down with abraham lincoln.
9:32 am
[ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] sadly, he did not bring the gifts i wanted that christmas. but i cannot overstate how huge tonight is. the size of the hugeness -- large. this night will go down in the annals of epic clashes between journalist and leader. frost nixon. wallace-khomeini. asteroid-freeman. but tonight is historic for another reason, because following our broadcast, this episode is going to be played in perpetuity for visitors at the carter presidential library and museum in plains, georgia. [ cheers and applause ] so, right now, not only am i speaking to millions of people watching tv, i'm also speaking to several dozen tourists sitting on benches.
9:33 am
[ cheers and applause ] hi, y'all! if you need the bathroom, go down the hall, turn right, and ask someone. i've never been there. i assume they have bathrooms. of course, as a conservative pundit, tonight's interview has tremendous personal significance to me. as a boy coming of age in the 1970's, jimmy carter was the very first liberal who made my blood boil. so in some ways, i have been preparing for tonight's interview my entire life, but specifically starting about three hours ago. but before the interview, carter library. first, a little background on the man you've named your building after. jim? >> stephen colbert presents -- [ music ] -- president jimmy carter. the colbert interview.
9:34 am
[ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: welcome to the stephen t. colbert national museum of jimmy carter-ing. james earl jones carter, jr. was born october 1, 1924 in plains, georgia, the eldest of four children to bessie lillian gordy and james earl carter, a prominent peanut farmer, which is why to this day carter must wear a label reading: "warning: manufactured in a facility that processes peanuts." after graduating high school, carter attended the u.s. naval academy and applied to work on the fledgling nuclear submarine program. in 1952, he dashed into a malfunctioning nuclear reactor to help shut it down. afterwards, he celebrated his success by destroying tokyo. after his father passed away in
9:35 am
1953, carter returned home to run the family business, ending a promising naval career. sadly, he never rose above the rank of "commander-in-chief." carter's family then fell on hard times and briefly lived in a georgia housing project, making him the only president to have "lived" in public housing... other than all of them. in 1970, carter was elected governor of georgia. did some stuff, probably. then, in 1976, carter became the first president since zachary taylor elected from the deep south. naturally, he was sworn in on a chicken-fried bible. in 1977, carter gave away "our" canal to some place called panama, enraging a man i like to call ronald reagan. ronald wilson reagan was born in 19 -- what's that? wrong library? okay.
9:36 am
i'm sorry. let's get him on. okay. in 1979, president carter negotiated the camp david accords, which brought peace between egypt and israel, marking a period of tranquility in the middle east that lasted almost 20 minutes. during the oil crisis, carter set an energy conservation example at the white house, where he turned down the thermostats wore sweaters to keep warm, installed solar panels on the roof and attached a windmill to walter mondale. 1979 also marked the beginning of the iran hostage crisis, when our tehran embassy was stormed, and 52 americans were held hostage, resulting in a low approval rating for carter, and an even lower trip advisor rating for the iranian embassy. rescue attempts failed, because,
9:37 am
sadly, add the time, ben affleck was only seven years old. [ laughter ] on july 15th 1979, jimmy carter gave his infamous "malaise" speech, which, interesting note, didn't actually contain the word "malaise." just like how during f.d.r.'s fireside chats, he wasn't actually on fire. not many people know that. in 1980, carter defeated ted kennedy in a hard-fought primary, and went on to win the greatest title of all, the man who lost to ronald reagan. ronald wilson reagan was born in tampico, illinois -- what? still not doing reagan? fine. deal's a deal. after his loss to reagan, president carter became "former" president carter, a title he has successfully defended for 33 years, including a 1987 split decision against hector "macho" camacho. i lost a "lot" of money on that.
9:38 am
within years of leaving office, jimmy carter founded the carter center, a humanitarian organization which has fought for human rights and disease prevention. and for three decades, he has worked with habitat for humanity, building houses for the poor all over the world -- in an obvious attempt to launch his hgtv show, "nail to the chief." [ cheers and applause ] in 2002, jimmy carter was awarded the nobel peace prize, making him the only native georgian besides martin luther king to have won the award. but good luck next year. hulk hogan. in summation, when talking about our nation's presidents, history will recognize jimmy carter was one of them. congratulations, sir. back to you, stephen.
9:39 am
[ cheers and applause ] thank you, stephen. when we return, i will sit down with the 39th president of the united states. who's that? you'll have to stick around to find out. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] than chocolate, it's an invitation to stop and savor the unmistakable taste that reminds us that life is delicious. the all-new chevy silverado: from the family of the most dependable, longest-lasting full-size pickups on the road... the truck that beats any ford f-150 in fuel economy... and the 2014 north american truck of the year. and now, during chevy truck month, the price you see is the price you pay, for a 2014 chevy silverado now use special truck month pricing to get a total value of over 75-hundred on this silverado all-star edition with best in class v8 fuel economy.
9:40 am
9:42 am
>> stephen: my guest tonight is the former leader of the free world. please welcome former president jimmy carter! [ cheers and applause ] thank you very much! president, thank you so much for being here. it has been a long-time goal of mine to have you on the show so i can take you to task for your liberal ways. >> i have been expecting that. >> stephen: have you ever seen the show you're on? >> yes. >> stephen: okay. [ laughter ] did you know i've got a bone to pick with your presidency and your legacy. we'll get to that in a moment. you've got a brand-new book. >> i have, yes. >> stephen: "a call to reaction, women, religion, violence and power." first of all, just from the subtitle, this isn't one of those 50 shades, right?
9:43 am
[ laughter ] you've written about a dozen books at this point. >> 28. >> stephen: 28 books. but who's counting? [ cheering ] i understand a call to action, sir. what do women, religion, violence and power have to do with each other? they seem like unrelated topics. i understand the violence and i assume the power, but what does religion have to do with it? religion is the greatest force for the good -- as long as you're a christian. and the world. >> and as long as you take your religion from jesus christ. that's true. >> stephen: i'm a christian, are you? >> absolutely. >> stephen: great. you're not a baptist yet. >> stephen: i'm not a baptist. i understand you're not a catholic yet. >> no, not yet. >> stephen: there's still time, sir. >> i'm thinking about it. i have two provisions to be catholic. if pope francis stays on in
9:44 am
office and when a female catholic priest asks me to join her church. [ cheers and applause ] [ chanting ] >> stephen: those are your demands. jimmy carter has drawn a line in the sand. [ laughter ] all right, all right. have you told the pope this? >> i wrote the pope a letter about this book and about the problem with women's abuse, and he sent me a very wonderful letter back, and he said that he agreed with many things that i told him about, which he already knew, i'm sure, and said, in his opinion in the future years, women needed to play a much greater role in the catholic church than they were playing now or have played in the past. >> stephen: so what do you think the negative end of religion is when it relates to women? [ applause ] thank you. i did ask that question well, thank you. [ laughter ] what's the negative side of religion? >> well, if you read just the
9:45 am
words and actions of jesus christ, he exalted women. he never made any insinuation that women were inferior in any way. >> stephen: but he only picked 12 male apostles. >> yes. >> stephen: don't criticize jesus, watch it. >> when paul wrote his letters to asia minor, he wrote to the individual churches about their problems and some of the words of paul as our chief religious theologians for christians can be interpreted either way. if you are a male religious leader and want to stay in power and not want women challengers, you can pick some of the things paul said. >> stephen: men love your wives, wives obey your husband. >> and says husbands and wives should respect to the other and then goes on. >> stephen: right. but paul wrote to the galatians saying there's no difference between a man and woman, slave and master, gentile
9:46 am
or jew, everyone's equal in the eyes of god. so there are 36,000 or so verses in the bible and you can choose one or the other ones if you want to -- >> stephen: that's what's great about america. our freedom of religion allows me to interpret the bible exactly as my world view already. >> yeah, i noticed that on your show. >> stephen: yep. [ applause ] if i read this book, my problem with liberals is they're always trying to make me feel guilty about things. as a white, christian, male, upper-class guy, am i going to feel guilty if i read this book? because i already have so much guilt. i already feel -- you know, i feel guilty about black people, about women now. a black woman walks in the room, i've got to leave. too much for me to handle. will this make me feel bad? >> not unless you're in favor of abusing girls on the campus or in the military. >> stephen: okay. or unless you're in favor of
9:47 am
slavery. >> stephen: no. lavery is a worse problem now than in the 19th century. >> stephen: wait a second -- it's true. >> stephen: we had institutionalized slavery then. >> i know. 80% of slaves sold across the borders are little girls sold into sexual slavery and this comes from the u.s. state department in which i'm sure you have confidence when a republican is there. [ applause ] >> stephen: well, we have to take a little break. when we come back, let's talk about the time there was a democrat there named seriously earjames earlcarver. earjames earlcarver. will you stick around? why get delivery, when you can have digiorno? delivery or digiorno. now with a flavorful new sauce, digiorno's rising crust pizza is better than ever! thankfully it's not delivery, it's digiorno.
9:48 am
yeah. i heard about progressive's "name your price" tool? i guess you can tell them how much you want to pay and it gives you a range of options to choose from. huh? i'm looking at it right now. oh, yeah? yeah. what's the... guest room situation? the "name your price" tool, making the world a little more progressive. and then a 3:15 with my guilt. [ female announcer ] special k cracker chips. 27 crispy chips. 110 delicious calories. same time tomorrow? [ female announcer ] find them in the cracker aisle. ♪ [ female announcer ] find them in the cracker aisle. transferred money from his before larry instantly bank of america savings account to his merrill edge retirement account. before he opened his first hot chocolate stand calling winter an "underserved season". and before he quit his friend's leaf-raking business for "not offering a 401k."
9:49 am
larry knew the importance of preparing for retirement. that's why when the time came he counted on merrill edge to streamline his investing and help him plan for the road ahead. that's the power of streamlined connections. that's merrill edge and bank of america. introducing the new flatizit's on.bway! flatizza! super crispy flatbread topped with mozzarella, marinara...and made the way you say. subway you did it again. right now get two for only $5. subway. eat fresh. [ male announcer ] the exceedingly nimble, ridiculously agile, tight turning, fun to drive 2014 smart. ♪
9:50 am
tight turning, fun to drive 2014 smart. ♪ that's pretty tasty. it's from special k? 240 calories. special k flatbread breakfast sandwiches. if you guys could come back tomorrow, it would be fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] >> stephen: we're back with president jimmy carter. now, president carter, you are now 32 years, five presidencies removed from office but you never retired. >> no. >> stephen: you founded the carter center and have been traveling around the world working to eradicate disease, trying to promote democracy around the world. do other ex-presidents call you up and say, please knock it off? some of us would like to relax. because you invented the idea of the post-presidency. what inspired you to do that?
9:51 am
>> i didn't have anything else to do. >> stephen: you were bored? i was one of the younger graduates of the white house and i had been defeated, involuntarily retired by the election in 1980 thanks to you and other people that voted the wrong way. [ laughter ] >> stephen: i was only 16 at the time. >> okay, okay. and a i'm a professor at emory university and have been now for 32 years, but that, writing books and running the carter center is about the only thing i have to do besides running a family. i have 12 grandchildren and 9 great grandchildren, so i have a big family, and i have to take care -- i'm still getting acquainted with my wife rosalynn after 68 years. [ cheers ] >> stephen: does she ever say, you know, for pete's sake,
9:52 am
jimmy, you have been president for four years, kick back and have a billy beer. did you ever have one of your brother's beers when you were president? >> he advised me not to drink it. >> stephen: i have a six-pack. want to open one up? >> no, thanks. they're very valuable, by the way. >> stephen: it's now paying for my college education. okay, here's my beef with you. why are you out there building houses for poor people? have you not read anything? when you give poor people things, you enslave them to your charity, it's an act of violence. i can't do anything for myself, jimmy carter'll do it for me. i can't reach the remote, jimmy carter, get it for me. do you understand? >> i understand. my wife and i have helped build houses for 31 years and we never built a house that the family that lived in the house didn't work twice as long and twice as hard as we did, so we require
9:53 am
them to work on it. [ applause ] and they also have to pay full price. >> stephen: they have to pay for the house? >> they have to pay full price. >> stephen: oh, so you're not such a nice guy! i thought you were a nice guy! >> we don't charge them any interest. they have 20 years to pay and don't have to pay interest. what bible says as you well know as a christian that you don't charge interest to a poor person, so we don't charge any interest. [ applause ] >> stephen: now, harry truman -- as i said, you have been out of the presidency 32 years and out in the world working, harry truman said the highest title a person can achieve is the title of citizen. how does it compare to president? >> it's superior. obviously, the citizens of america are the president's bosses and can remove him from office if they choose, which i have experienced.
9:54 am
>> stephen: unless he's spying on them, then he knows when they're coming for him. >> yeah. [ applause ] >> stephen: now, you said that you believe that the nsa is probably monitoring your e-mails and, therefor, if you want to be private, you send snail mail. >> i do. >> stephen: the n.s.a. today dade, no, president carter is wrong, we are not monitoring his e-mails so, good news, you can start writing e-mails again and the n.s.a. won't look at them. >> a few weeks ago they told the congress they didn't monitor anyone in the united states. >> stephen: so we're all fine. yes. >> stephen: do you have a relationship with the president? >> yes, a very friendly relationship. >> stephen: does he call you for advice? >> no. but you have to remember, i have been out of office, as you said, 30-something years and i think when he wants to get advice, he gets it from the most recent presidents, which i did. >> stephen: did you have a relationship with the presidents who came before you?
9:55 am
before you were president, l.b.j. was gone. >> he was gone and truman was gone. i only had two living presidents when i was president, gerald ford and richard nixon, and they helped me with key issues, might say like fraternity brothers having graduated from the same school. >> stephen: was there a hazing? >> i went through a hazing when i ran against gerald ford, but later, when i defeated him, subsequent to that, he and i became, according to the historians, the two closest friends that ever graduated from the white house. >> stephen: are they right about that? >> they're right. >> stephen: when president obama was inaugurated, there's a photo of all five living presidents standing with each other. >> yes. >> stephen: you're standing a little bit off from everybody. do you enjoy hanging out with the other presidents? >> yeah, i really do, yeah. >> stephen: do you guys get
9:56 am
together and do things? >> in the south, we don't get all that close to other men, you know. [ laughter ] >> stephen: jimmy carter, thank you so much! president jimmy carter. his book is "a call to action." we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] give extra. get extra. ♪ everyone wants to be the cadbury bunny. cause only he brings delicious cadbury crème eggs, while others may keep trying. nobunny knows easter better than cadbury!
9:57 am
this is the car i fell in love with! picking up my new malibu! no way! it's the chevy open house event look at joe's new truck where the price you see is the price you pay. nope that's me, alright! my equinox! from our house to your house it's time to take home an award winning chevy now during the chevy open house event , get this well equipped 2014 chevy cruze lt for under nineteen grand. find new roads at your local chevy dealer. it's an invitation to stop and savor the unmistakable taste that reminds us that life is delicious. why get delivery, when you can have digiorno? delivery or digiorno. delivery or digiorno.
9:58 am
digiorno. now with a flavorful new sauce, made with vine ripened tomatoes and more herbs & spices... digiorno's rising crust pizza comes fresh from your oven and is now better than ever! thankfully it's not delivery, it's digiorno. nestle. good food, good life. phone: your account is already paid in full. oh, well in that case, back to vacation mode. ♪boots and pants and boots and pants♪ ♪and boots and pants and boots and pants♪ ♪and boots and pants... voice-enabled bill pay. just a tap away on the geico app. ♪ huh, 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. yup, everybody knows that. well, did you know that some owls aren't that wise. don't forget about i'm having brunch with meagan tomorrow. who? seriously, you met her like three times. who?
10:00 am
captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org mac: you accidentally burn down a building, and you get 120 hours of community service? now this says that i got to work with kids. - yeah, me, too. - now, i don't like kids. yeah, i have 248 hours of, uh... interstate. inter... interstate. sanitation. - interstate sanitation. - well, what is that? that's the guys with the orange vests who pick up trash. oh, my god, and then, what is this about aa? alcoholics anonymous. for... six-- oh, my god. - months! - that is so unfair! what do you expect, charlie? why would you tell the judge you were drunk? 'cause i was drunk, dee. well, why would you say that to him? i thought that would get me off the hook. oh, my god. what is up with this bill? dude? those mimosas were, like, eight bucks a pop, charlie. are you serious? well, you had, like, seven of them!
97 Views
Uploaded by TV Archive on