he do you know any scary storiesk i can think of one. >> the ledge ind of sarah palin. >> shut up, ri, he lives in america now, he deserves to know. >> yeah, i deserve to know, what do i deserve to know? >> guys, are we really dg this? >> okay. it started back in 2008 when an old white man named john mccain wished for someone to keep him company. >> when out of an alaskan blizzard emerged a great mama grizly. >> they called her sarah palin. >> so it's' true. >> and old man mccain named her as his vice president! >> for months she roamed the real american countryside destroying the rules of politics an grammar, saying things like drill, lady, drill. and lipstick on a pig. >> the mama grizly. >> oldman mccain tried to stop

her but it was too late. >> some say she may have costing him the white house. >> so what happened to her? >> a lot of folks don't know. she disappeared for awhile. she had a few cable shows that tanked. >> okay, you guys are really freaking me out. >> don't worry, buddy, sarah palin can only reappear if she is summoned. >> somebody has to look into a mirror app say you becha. >> three times. >> wait, you guys, where's trevor? >> trevor? >> you betcha. you betcha. you betcha. >> no, no. >> absolutely, man, bingo. >> no! no! from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. captioning sponsored by comedy central

>> trevor: thank you so much, everybody. welcome to the daily show. i'm trevor noah. my guest tonight, from mozart in the jungle, gael garcia bernal is here, everybody! (cheers and applause) and i am really excited for another reason. i will tell you why. you know when i first got the job to host "the daily show" people told me trevor, this is going to be hard. you will have to study every day. because there say presidential election going on. and you can't be involved in the american political process and know nothing about it. in fact, their exact words were, as an outsider, i don't know if you will survive. (laughter) but it turns out it wasn't true. it turns out a lot of the presidential candidates are in the same position as i am.

(laughter) i feel like every day i read something in the news and i go, huh, i didn't know that about the government. and at the same time donald trump is reading the same newspaper going huh, neither did i. (laughter) we're like a study group. but donald trmp is not the first american candidate to get so far in politics knowing so little. he's the second. (laughter) and of course, like every version of an iphone, you know the second one is better better but you still have to give props to the original. and sarah palin was the original. and yesterday america found the old cable, plugged it in, and guess what, it still works. >> he's from the private sector, not a politician. can i get a hallelujah. >> hallelujah. >> where in the private sector you actually have to balance budgeted to prioritize, to keep the main thing, the main thing. and he knows the main thing of

president is to keep us safe economicically and militarily. he knows the main thing. and he knows how to lead the charge. so troops, hang in there, because help's on the way because he, better than anyone, isn't he known for being able to command, fire! (laughter). >> trevor: what? that is amazing! she's all over the place. like it's not even human. it's like the only thing sarah palin hates more than obama is punk yaition. nobody is-- like it is almost like she a malfunctioning robot, maybe, or the troop, or the commander, or boy, or e it is like a bag of scrabble tiles that grew a body and came to life. it's so randomment and whatever she is, she is happy to be in front of a crowd. and if you are wondering, trevor, what the hell is sarah palin doing back on stage? well, you see, she has come back from the willedderness, or as

americans call it, alaska, to endorse donald trump for president. and yes, i am here to endorse sarah palin endorsing donald trump for president. and you know, i lot of people were saying they couldn't wrap their brain around what she was saying, and that is a problem right there, people. with sarah palin, you don't think. you just enjoy. >> looking around at all of you, you hard workin, iowa families, you farm families and teachers and teamsters, an cops and cooks, you rogin rollers and holy rollers! all of you who work so hard, you full time moms, you with the hands that rock the cradle. (laughter). >> trevor: i'm sorry, the hands that rock the cradle? i done think sarah palin understood the point of that movie. (laughter) >> that's right, where's my

psychopathic nanies at? let's hear it for you single white females with your fatal attractions and your basic instincts. and by the way, what is she wearing? it looks like she killed a disco pork pine. what the hell is go-- porcupine. what is going on. there i am love every minute of this. >> we, you, a diverse, dynamic, needed support base that they would attack. and now some of them even whispering, they're ready to throw in for hillary over trump because they can't afford to see the status quo go, otherwise they won't be able to be slurping off the gravy train that's been feeding them all these years. (laughter). >> trevor: you know how americans love all those african characters in movies like the gods must be crazy and coming to

america, and everyone is like oh, funny sounds that come out of their mouths. and now as africans, we're watching this. (laughter) and people in africa right now watching this. (applause) she talks and it never ends. i bet even steven avery is like that sentence is long and ridiculous. now one thing that did seem strange-- (laughter). >> trevor: i have always known sarah palin as a friend of middle american common man. so i wasn't sure how she would justify endorsing a new york billionaire. >> yeah, our leader, a little bit different. he's a multibillionaire, not that there is anything wrong with that. but it is amazing. he is not elitist at all. he spent his life with the

workin man. and that is refreshing. because he as he builds things, he builds big things, things that touch the sky. >> trevor: okay, now, first of all, he spent his life with the working man? telling him what to do, that is what she forgot to add in there. and secondly y is she talking to iowans like they are caveman. this man builds big things, they touch sky. he invent fire as catch phrase, then he fly on metal bird. who are you! (applause) but the greatest part of palin's speech to me wasn't her. it was done ald trump. because he just stood behind her on stage the entire time and he looked like he understood everything she was saying. (laughter) the whole time he's stand up

there like yup, yup, that makes sense, doing great, very sain, very sain. honestly, it reminded me, i don't know if you ever watched those old wrestling sper views where macho man randy savage was at the camera and the other guy just had to stand there and listen. trump would have fit perfectly in wrestling. >> i remember a time where we stood in front of the man that does nothing but lie, brother law. and you told some of the biggest lies that i've ever heard of in my whole life! (applause). >> trevor: this is why america is so great, people. presidents might have term limits, but sarah palin is forever. we'll be right back. we'll be right back. (cheers and applause) video streaming burns tons of data. and those other guys love over charging you for it. not t-mobile! now you can binge watch without watching your data.

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>> trevor: welcome back to the daily show. so far in 2016 wall street has seen its worst opening to a new year ever with the dow plunging more than nine and a half percent. to put that in perspective, nine and a half percent is nearly 20% of 50%. >> i don't really follow finance. but even in volatile market still has good investments. here to help is unlicensed financial advisor hasan minhaj in our new segment "livin' on the street."

>> thank you, trevor. you're black, i'm brown. let's make some green. now what is the best investment strategy i know winning powerball. du h. i'm going to show you guys some other great investments to make you some cold hard cash. >> gun stocks are surging. >> the s&p is down 3.7% and smith and wesson if they were in that in-- index it would be second only to netflix. >> that's right, gun stocks and streaming are up huge. that's why i'm looking at a portfolio strategy of netflix and kill. boom thyme. now you are probably thinking hasan, investing in guns? are you crazy? >> yeah, i am crazy. crazy rich. and as long as obama is in the white house this gun play is a lock. and you could be loaded. >> the time that there has been suggestion of gufn legislation or any sort of legislation. >> there is a mass shooting. >> sales go up. >> yes, because people feel this may be the last opportunity to

buy a gun. >> it's been a winning investment. >> you guys hear that? >> winning investment. so when there is a mass shootk, i say skip the vigil and buy, buy, buy. because anything the government tries to regulate, goes through the roof. do you guys have any idea how much have i been paying for vicodin lately? too much, chaz. check the start, you started me at $5 a pop, now are you just ripping me off. here is what i am trying to say, you guys am when the president even mentions gun control, americans line up to buy ar-15 like they are tickle me el mows on black friday. isn't that right, el mow. >> say hello to my little friend. el mow gets it. now i know some of you at home mielt be saying i don't know, hasan, investing in guns. it feels morally irresponsible. what is my wife going to think. i will tell you what my wife is thinking, she is thinking i'm taking full custody age the house, hasan. that's not going to happen, janet! that's fine, you know, what's a

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watching telle tubbies on the i pad. step your game up, you are making daddy look dumb. anyway, are you probably thinking hasan, legos outperforming gold, are you lying, does this look like the face of a liar. it's not. i'm so big into legos i will partner with an exciting if you company and you can all get on f inn on the ground floor. >> we're livering in scary times, financial kal amity, national unrest. south african tv hosts. which is why i wanted to share a unique and exciting opportunity from lego line capital. for the past 15 years legos, just like these guys right here, have had a consistent 12% return. that's better than stocks and better than gold. plus they're awesome. take advantage of this opportunity, call now. i'm serious. call now. >> to gets your lego land starter kit with an instruction manual and storage buck call 855-229-leg-o. >> i know what you are thinking, that is quite an offer. and it is. also if you call now, i will get you in on the best investment

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(cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome bhak back. pie guest tonight is an acker who recently won a golden globe award for amazon's mozart in the jungle. >> okay, i tell you what, are you substituting, you can substituting assistant for me. >> it is supposed to be in a weird position with the orchestra since they know i work for you. >> i done see any weird position. >> you need to find a new assistant by next week, end of story. >> not end of the story. >> there is the ladies room. >> and? >> it's for ladies. gloria spoke to you about this, step outside, maestro. also, are you aware that a father donated our organ and our rehearsal rooms and our

apartment. >> and she can make them up. >> anybody can. >> that is very insulting to you, how is it going, sn theea. >> hello. >> how are you doing. >> i'm good, this is the ladies room. >> trevor: please welcome gael garcia bernal. (applause) nice. >> gael. >> such a pleasure. >> that's such a great name, gael. >> let's talk about your success. first of all, let's get straight into it congratulations on the golden globe. >> thank you, thank you so much. thank you. why did you look so shocked? i saw you, and then like you got up, first i thought you were doing that fake thing where you are like oh, me? but you really were shocked. >> i was really shocked. >> why? >> i-- i don't know. when you start doing these things you don't expect these things to happen. this kind of attention to happen

to something about classical music. so all of a sudden it was like it started to be real and more real and when they said my name, it just got really slow motion. and it just got worse and-- i had to walk down the steps and the good thing is that as soon as i was walking down the steps i saw all hand ro inrito who is the director who i first worked with. >> and now is he like super uber nominated for "the revenant." >> trevor: yeah. >> and he said like something like-- and i was like yeah-- i know. and so i went up the stairs and that was my-- the way to get up the stairs and start to say something. because also hi nothing prepared. i didn't know what to say. >> trevor: he brought you back to reality with home. that is basically what he did ramble off in spanish. mozart in the jungle, when i first saw the spots of like the poster, i thought it was a spoof of something because it is a musical, like as a composer in

new york city behind him looks like a joke, mozart in the jungle but it is a beautiful story. it really is about classical music and a lot of sex. >> a lot of sex, yes. >> trevor: is there that much sex in the classical. >> does that sound funny. >> trevor: i didn't find the sex funny. there were moments but. >> there is a lot of sex in the-- yeah, i think with all those, you know, like long oboes and kind of-- you know. the drums and stuff, they-- trying to-- . >> trevor: i love that you think the oboes are the sexiest thing, that was the first strument that came to mind. hmmmm, oboes. >> i know, i know, i know. have i become very in touch with the orchestra, once are you in touch with the orchestra, you grow up with different appetites. >> trevor: are you so charming. you just have like-- everyone at home is likek hmmmm, oboes. did you, this was a great story,

for those who don't know, it is basically the story of a young man who is very talented, does well for himself in his home country. comes to new york city and takes over a job from an older man who is revered in new york for doing what he does, very far fetched story. (laughter) but you-- but you come in an as a composer, do you have to learn any composing or are you just making it up? >> it looks like i'm making it up. >> it looks like are you making it up, but i never know because it looks like they are all making it up. >> for us amateurs it mietd look like oh, looks like, you know, something is happening. but for real musicians they go like, well, yeah, like one fifth of what you did was kind of okay. and then the rest is just-- but like singing you know, good singers don't need to vay good trained voice. they just need the blood, no?

the thing about the blood. and rodrigo plays with the blood, my character, so i studied a little bit. >> trevor: before i let you know, i wanted to ask you, this was fascinating. i read about this. you are working on a movie that is about a mexican immigrant making his way into america and the store see is, i know this is not coming out yet but i found it sos so naturing-- fascinating, what is that movie going to be about. >> it is the story about a group of my grant, the character i play is a migrant coming back to the united states because he was deported and they are closing the border between mexico and the united states. and once they cross there is one of those guys that decides to take matters into their hands and protect the imaginary line. >> trevor: ted cruz. >> yeah. >> trevor: i get it. and decides to shoot them. decides to shoot at them.

and then it becomes a quat and-- cat and mouse. you know, it becomes an action-packed horror movie. >> trevor: it looks absolutely amazing. everything are you doing, man. great things. >> thank you so much, man. >> trevor: thank you for being here. >> thank you. >> trevor: mozart in the jungle, on amazon right now, gael garcia bernal, everyone. (applause) ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

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text mom. i'll be right back. be good. boys have been really good today. send. let's get mark his own cell phone. nice. send. brad could use a new bike. send. [siri:] message. you decide. they're your kids. why are you guys texting grandma? it was him. it was him. keep your family connected. app-connect. on the newly redesigned passat. from volkswagen. (applause). >> trevor: that's our show for tonight. here it s everybody, your moment of zen. >> how about the rest of us. right wingin, bitter clingin proud swingers of our guns, our god and our religions and our constitution. tell us that we're not red

>> larry: tonightly, the governor of michigan apologizes to flint residents for the city's poisonous water supply. oh, and speaking of i.q.-lowering toxic ( bleep ), did you hear that sarah palin is now endorsing donald trump? the cover of today's "new york daily news" features trump, palin, and the headline "i'm with stupid." ( laughter ) hold on, guys. i'm confused. which one isn't stupid? ( applause ) and michigan governor rick snyder has agreed to release his emails from 2014 and 2015. hey, governor snyder, now that you've made your emails transparent, why don't ( cheers and applause )