- my facebook profile went rogue, dad. had to go into the circuitry and do battle with it. i sent all my friends somewhere else. - oh, okay. so we're--we're not friends then? - [bleep] off, dad. [beep] - ahhhh. ahhahahahahahaha! >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> trevor: welcome to the daily show, everybody. thank you so much. i'm trevor noah. my guest tonight, author sherman

alexie is joining us, everybody. but first let's get straight into it. an american airlines plane was delayed this weekend when a woman reported some suspicious activity. >> an american airlines flight delay over math. listen to this, a woman mistaking this italian pan for a terrorist. she alerted the flight attendant in a note after she saw him writing down equations. they pulled the ivy league professor off the plane for questioning. he later said he was working on a math problem for a speech he was writing. >> trevor: you know what people, i get it. i get it. we fear what we do not understand. and i don't know lhat the [bleep] that is. in fact, in her defense, if you go in closer, it kind of looks like c4 equals kaboom. what does that say, what does that say. this only goes to show, the only thing americans fear more than terrorism is math. like you just think the odds of dying in a terror attack are so high because you don't know how to calculate the odds. and you know what, i don't blame

americans for thinking math is scary. i mean after all you do learn it from a vampire. so this is one of those things that is understandable. what is so funny about flying now is you can use the fear of terrorism to just do whatever you like on a plane. it's like hey, do you mind if i get the armrest, no, no you don't? what's that. oarksz, you said death to america s that what you said. stewardess, i'm pretty sure that crying baby just said allahu akbar, yeah, yeah, sad times. turning now to the race for president. the gop nomination has been a long and hard fight. feelings were hurt, nicknames were coined. stages were fallen off of. and now the race is over. and the republican voters have chosen a mutant from a carrot juicing accident. and now in order to win the general election, republicans know what they need to do. >> we want to bring unity to the republican party. we have to bring unity.

>> i think what is required is that we union fie this party. >> we need to come together sooner than later. >> you are either on the team or not on the team. >> unifying and growing the party is the only way we're going to win. >> trevor: why does he seem so-- was' going on there. unifie, it's the only way to get through this. i love that. yeah. unifie,u nity. yeah, reminded me of that queen latifah song except the people singing this time are neither women or black. so the party leadership is calling for unity amongst all the republicans. just like the primaries, it's going very well. >> a deep divide within the republican party. >> the frak sured republican party. >> split hard. >> mitt romney saying he won't even vote let alone attends cop vengs. >> dick cheney throwing his support to the frontrunner bns both president bush saying you won see them at the republican convention. >> mitch mcconnell is promising to support the nominee. >> john mccain won't be attending. >> senator rand paul said he is endorsing the nominee.

>> in is no reason for me to go to the convention. >> trevor: what do you mean there's no reason to go? what about the gift bags? and here's how the fighting is breaking down. right now the republicans are basically split into three camps. so you have got the people who don't support trump. you've got the people who aren't ready to support trump. and the most interesting people are a group who spent the whole race throwing [bleep] at trump and now they are picking it back up, spreading it on a sandwich and taking a big bite. >> like all narcissists donald trump is insecure and weak. >> if he is the nominee i will be voting for him. i will be supporting him. >> he's not qualified to be president. >> the important for the party to get behind donald trump. >> you cannot direct your anger towards people. that is fascist talk. >> but the fact of the mat certificate that i didn't attack him as a person. >> let no one be mistaken. donald trump's candidacy is a cancer on conservatism. >> rick perry just toll me in a

phone call from his home state in texas that he does support donald trump. i asked him if he would be interested in being donald trump's running mate. and he said i am not going to say no. (laughter). >> trevor: so wait, you want to be running mates with cancer? that's what you are saying? i mean i guess it has a pretty strong history of winning, but still. and those are the people who got on board with trump. it really is like a subway train, you know, if you ever ridden in the subway. sometimes the train pulls up and there is that crazy guy screaming in the train. and some people are like well look, i still have to get to work so i guess i'm riding the crazy train. but there are other people who are like oh, man, i know this is my train, but i'll wait for the next within. >> freshman center ben staff of nebraska said he could never vote for trump. >> represent illinoisan as ros-lehtinen and car loss curbela say theg would not vote for donald trump. >> jeb bush says now that he is never trump as well.

posting on facebook saying he will not vote for donald trump. >> he is not displaying a respect for the constitution an is he not a consistent conservative. >> pretty remarkable statement there. from jeb bush. >> trevor: that is remarkable from jeb bush. standing up to donald trump, although i don't love that he made it on facebook though. you know, it's been months, jeb. go outside. a man can only live on spaghetti-o and netflix for so long, my friend. go out. and trump, obviously responded to jeb bush because he would like rose from titanic. he will never let go. >> obviously bush can't be there, the campaign was too tough. and he couldn't take it. >> trevor: trump, trump can't help taking a swipe at jeb bush. even though like jeb bush dropped out of the race in february and still trump is getting-- you know when trump son his death bed, he is still going to be like, i'm dying and i [bleep] the bet, just like-- i

the bed, just like jeb bush did in 2016. boo. oh, oh. doctor will be like oh my god, he's flat lining. >> just like jeb's campaign in 2016. boom! (applause). >> trevor: but there really is only one republican who says that trump has not yet proved his bonaified as a true conservative that the party needs. and that man is paul ryan. he part time abercrombie & fitch model, speaker of the house, more than anyone else today ryan represents the party establishment. so if ryan is with you, you have unified the party. and if ryan is not with you, well then you are donald trump. >> he is the speaker of the house. he's the highest ranking elected republican in the country right now. he's the chairman of the convention. back in march he said he would pay a price if he didn't get along with you. what is that price?

>> well, we're going to see what happens. >> if paul ryan chair the convention if he doesn't endorse you. >> that is a question you have to ask him and reince and i guess me. (laughter). >> trevor: right. that's why he's asking you am. you are you. i have never seen anyone dodge a question that way before. i can't help you. i condition help you, man. the guy you are looking for is me. (laughter) find me on tv sometime and ask me. i would do it now but i'm doing an interview with some dumbass. for more on this growing riff in the party, we turn to senior political analyst, jrd an klepper, everybody. the republican party seems to be in total disarray. >> trevor, this republican crisis couldn't be more serious. the grand old party of lincoln and of reagan is tearing itself apart before our eyes. and all because its voters after

years of hearing water boarding is not torture and obamacare is worse than slavery, they listened and picked donald trump. (laughter). >> trevor: jordan. >> i'm good, i'm good, i'm good. trevor, it is serious. and historic. even president george w. bush is now forced to reject his own party. not lead to the great recession his dumb policies-- (laughter) there it goes again. >> trevor: jordan, what is going on with you? >> trevor, they were all such assholes. (laughter) for so long. and they completely did this to themselves. >> trevor: yes, but jordan, there are real consequences. >> yes, donald trump is superdangerous but right now, appreciate the irony. the wall, the birth certificates. >> trevor: i can't deal with this. let's go to trump headquarters

with hisan minhaj is also covering the rep can nomination, everyone. >> thank you, trevor. the republican party establishment is in tatters. tatters. i'm not-- tatters. like a dog that chewed its own balls off. i'm sorry. >> i know, right? >> rick perry called him a cancer. now he's on the trump cancer train just like toot toot. >> trevor: guys, guys. >> toot, toot. >>. >> stop it, stop it. >> trevor: jordan what is going on-- are you peeing your pants? >> he peed his pants. he's ming his peeing his pants. >> trevor: please, jordan. this is so embarrassing.

>> i know, i know. republicans are never going to get er it. i tell you this much, i will have this mess cleaned up before july, unlike the gop. >> trevor: all right, jordan klepper, hasan minhaj, everyone. we'll be right back. we'll be right back. >> trevor: you need to get announcing pizza hut's new applewood smoked bacon and melty cheese in the crust pizza hut's bacon stuffed crust pizza is here! now with applewood smoked bacon shhh and loaded with cheese just $12.99. only at pizza hut. you made with your airline credit card.these purchases hold on...you only got double miles on stuff you bought from that airline?

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welcome back to the show. now yesterday was mother's day. and i got my mom the perfect gift. a life-sized trevor noah pillow, that way when she misses me, she can give me a hug. yeah, that's not my mom. our own desi lydic is a new mom and she has some tips to make moms feel special any day of the year. >> hey, everyone. there's a lot of stuff they don't tell you before you have a baby.

like how much love you can feel for this tiny little creature. how much that tiny little creature can [bleep] in your hair. but the biggest surprise is how many folks are going to tell you that suck at being a mom. >> the rise of mom-shaming, women criticizing other women for their approaches to parenting. >> according to a today.com survey, more than 90% of people feel they've been judged for their patienting decisions. annie says she was judged for not breastfeeding while shopping for formula, she was approached by a stranger who told her breast is best. >> wait, breast is best? who is the creep walking around the store and whispering about boobs, an sure, breast is best unless you are breastfeeding in public, and then everyone wants you to put those tatas away. because boobs are like cars, the second you put miles on those puppies, their value goes way down. but that's the world of mom-shaming. i swear, it's like the secretary you become a mom, people just can't help themselves.

when i was single, nobody came up to me and said hey, if you buy that warming lubricant you might as well be using hot sauce on your vagina. if only they had. mom-shaming sucks. but don't worry, cuz i'm going to show you how to and a half-- sorry, hold on-- oh, hey, buddy. it's okay. mommy just making a quick video for the african. (laughter) okay. where was i? oh, right. a few simple rules to prevent mommy-shaming. rule number one, you can't prevent it. you can't even prevent strangers from giving ununsolicited advice. like when i was pregnant someone told me to prep for nursing by rubbing a loofa on my nipples. i was like thank you, sir, but i'm really just here to pick up my dry cleaning. and listen, the shaming is coming no matter who you are. >> date night fire storm, new mom chrissy teigen out to din we

are husband john legend over the weekend leaving their two week old daughter luna at home. a private decision gone public. the tv host met with harsh criticism on social media. spend bonding time with your baby and not let the nanny or babysit erase them. >> you're worried about the quality of john legend and chrissy teigen's child. it's not like they are getting their nanny you have krition list. they are rich celebrities. they could get marry poppins as in literally call julie andrews and get her tho come out of retirement to babysit in character as mary poppins. and look out. cuz mommy shaming can come from any direction. which brings me to my second rule. never let your guard down. even when you think you're in a safe place. >> my og/gyn was asking what the situation would be like after the baby was born. i told with our lifestyle, we do need to put him in daycare when he's two months. and he got a little sad. he told me, if you are my wife i

would much rather for you to stay home and not miss any bonding moment with the little kid. >> wait, what? if you were my wife? with her ob/gyn hitting on her? whoa, stop. put a-- buy a lady a virgin pina kol adda first. oh good god. hold on. oh, god, how did you get poop all the way up your neck? jeez, sorry. where was i? right. moms, don't let the shaming get you down. remember, rule number three, it is not your fault. want to know whose fault it is? it's your baby's fault because you had a plan. so did i. i was going to have a natural birth. and a free standing tub of smart water. i was going to breses feed until my baby was 156 months and then junior rolled out and was all bleep whreep that noise. -- [bleep] that noise. scooby, stop it, stop eating that dieper, put it down. >> we are all just doing the

best we can. you woon even believe the crazy that moms have to deal with. oh great, the dragon's back. where did mommy put her sword? oh, here it is. moms, look, i know it's tough. but you're doing fine. no matter what people say. you have got this. a-w, there there, sweetie. it's okay. finally sleeping. i now have some time to myself. to read all those comments you postedbout how i hold my baby wrong. happy [bleep] mother's day. >> trevor: thanks, desi, desi lydic, everyone. we

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(cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome back. my guest tonight is an author whose new book is called thunder boy, jr. please welcome sherman alexie. (applause) thank you so much for being here.

>> thank you, it's great to be here. >> trevor: let's talk about the book immediately. i mean i'm a very quick reader. i read it in one day. >> did you take a course, speed reading. >> trevor: i did. i did. i looked through the pictures and i was like i've got. this i've got this book. >> it's like 125 words. >> trevor: it is really different from your normal work. why go from being an author to writing a kid's book. >> what i really loved is with my young adult novel, i would get letters from teens saying things like this is the first book i ever read. or this is the first book i ever loved. and that was so amazing to hear that. that i thought i want to write, you know, something for kids even younger to get that feeling. >> trevor: this say book about a young boy who has the name of his father, right. and you had the same thing. >> i am sherman alexie, jr. and the genesis of this book came at my father's funeral in 2003, where i happened to be standing at the foot of the coughin as they lowered it and as they lowered it, if there is a soundtrack it would have been 2001, right. and they lowered it and there

was my name on the tombstone. >> trevor: you see your name. >> so half a mile from my childhood home say tombstone with my name on it. so the weight, the existential weight of having my father's name hit me at that moment in such a way, i thought i need to write about this. >> trevor: cuz you now need to die so the tombstone doesn't get wasted. >> exactly. or, or, or we get-- or they bury me on top of him. yeah. >> trevor: i can feel that. but in the book, though, the kid, this is the story about a young boy and his father's name is thunder, thunder boy. and now he's going to be thunder boy, jr. thunder boy is such a supercool name yvment is thunder boy complaining about being thunder boy. >> because it's still not his name. and as he said, it doesn't measure something that he's done and who he is. >> trevor: how do you feel about naming of things. for instance, the redskins, that is a discussion i always see on tv and people on twitter fighting about. and the honest truth is, i've never actually seen native americans be part of the

discussion. >> well, we're never a part of discussion about our lives ever. we're colonized. but the thing is i know that redskins is a racial slur because it's never been said in a positive yeah to me. >> trevor: i never thought of it like that. >> have i never heard like hey, way to, do well on your sat, redskin. (laughter). >> trevor: i've never-- that's a great way to look at it. has it ever been said to you in a positive light. >> no, no, an also for all of these fans of the redskins, and the sports team, i was telling them to go into a tribal setting, you know, go to a tribal council meeting and walk in and yell out to at semmabled natives, hello, redskin, and see how that goes. >> trevor: it's the exact same thing if you go into a black neighborhood, what's up, my redskins, it's the same rule, basically. >> it's the same rule. >> trevor: if you cannot say it to the people's face and walk away with the same smile you had coming in, don't say it. >> then don't say it. >> trevor: i know i come from

a different world, but it seems to me, it could be anecdotal, it seems to me, feels to me sometimes that native americans are almost just not part of the conversations or the discussions or the-- it's just like, it's weird to get to a country and like go where is the people of the place. >> the strangest thing is we are everywhere in pop culture. don't turn the channel, but if you turned the channel right now, there is probably 17 channels with some native american imagery going on. the head gear, the headdress. a western, a commercial there is always something going on featuring this ancient idea of us. but nobody ever thinks of us in a contemporary sense. and we disappear as well. i come to new york and i become so ambiguously ethnic. i get spoken to in 178 different lan ig-- languages. i mean everybody thinks i'm half of whatever they are. so and all i know how to say is no habla, no habla.

lo ciento. >> well, you know what, i will tell you this, you have a home here, my redskin. >> thank you very much. >> trevor: thank you so much for being here. an amazing book. thunder boy, jr., will be available tomorrow. it say really great reed for the kids, sherman alexie, everybody. kids, sherman alexie, everybody. thank you so much for being here ♪ (catchy upbe♪ music) ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

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and topped with two slices of cherrywood-smoked bacon and cheese all on a freshly baked croissant. america runs on dunkin'. >> trevor: that's all we have time for, here is your moment of zen. >> lindsay graham, he knows less about the military tan my ten year old son baron. baron plays military soldiers. he knows about the military-- he said i've inbeen fighting isis for many years, how dare donald trump tell me what to do.