[ cheers and applause ]

ha! thank you for watching tonight. i want to thank my friends moshe kasher and eric andré. you can see moshe on comedy central's "another period," and he's the host of "hound tall discussion series" podcast. check it out. season 4 of eric andré's show starts... guys, what are you dancing to? ...august 5th at midnight... i'm krumping. ...on adult swim. you can follow me on twitter @nikkiglaser. next week, we've got margaret cho and kurt braunohler, so be sure to tune in. here's your happy ending. good night, pervs. [ cheers and applause ] moshe: wait. have you heard of nikki glaser? she's my favorite comic. hey, have you heard of nikki glaser? she's my favorite comic. [ both laugh ] nikki: no, i've never heard of her. no, i've -- i've never heard of her. i like amy schumer. i like amy -- amy schumer. [ laughter and applause ] >> from philadelphia, where the founding fathers first told england to suck it, it's the 2016 democratic national convention. let's not get crazy.

night one, a bold new theme. ( cheers ) >> trevor: welcome to the "daily show." welcome, everybody. thank you so much, philadelphia. i'm trevor noah. 7 we're coming to you from the university of pennsylvania's annenberg center which means the "daily show" is officially in philadelphia, baby. we're here. we made it here. week two of the conventions. last week was cleveland. and this week we're clearly in the manliest city in america. because everything in this city is about men, everything. it's the city of brotherly love. home of the founding fathers. yeah. boyz ii men. ( laughter ) yeah. like, even the football team is the eagles. the only animal that has male-pattern baldness, the only one. haugh laugh i mean, on top of the city hall tower i saw a statue of william

penn with his dick out. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) he looked like he was peeing on philadelphia. and here's what's so great about all of this. all this masculinity, and this city made history by nominating america's first major party female presidential candidate! ( cheers and applause ) we're so excited. we'll talk more about it. we have a guest tonight, the chairman of hillary clinton's campaign. john podesta will be joining us, which is really exciting. so to get straight into it. last night was start of the democratic national convention. they had the biggest speakers than a stretch hummer. they had cory booker, elizabeth warren, elijah cummings, and, of course, senator demi lovato. eva longoria was there, sarah silverman, and this was just night one. at this rate on thursday they'll bring out, like, abraham lincoln. he will come out and be like, "i came back to vote for hillary clinton. and to see the rest of that play was watching. ( laughter ) this time i want to sit in the

back." so many stars, so many stars. and just like-- just when you were like, you know, how can they top all this? how can they improve on this? is when they brought in the supernova, michelle obama. >> today, i wake up every morning in a house that wassibility by slaves. and i watch my daughters two beautiful, intelligent black young women playing with their dogs on the white house lawn. >> trevor: i feel like people cheered early on the slaves part. they were excited. "i grew up in a house built by slaves." and they were like, "i live in a house--" yay! built by slaves. i felt bad for republicans last night, whatever your politics, you have to admit these days they can't bring that kind of

star power. they don't have a michelle obama. they have a michelle obama tribute. it was almost a disaster for the democrats. for most of the day it seemed the party was going to rip itself apart from the seam because the day started like this. >>ang roy voices in the democratic party. >> debbie wasserman schultz, forced to resign amid a massive e-mail leak showing d.n.c. staffers favoring hillary clinton over bernie sanders during the democratic primary. >> the abrupt resignation comes after an e-mail hacking scandal at the d.n.c. >> trevor: another one? another e-mail scandal? oh, the democrats give up more with ( bleep ) e-mails than a nigerian prince. if you haven't caught it in the news, this is what happened. someone hacked the d.n.c., possibly the russians, leaking 19,000 of their e-mails. now, fortunately, there were no news, but the privates that were

exposed showed party officials plotting against bernie sanders during the primaries. in the wake of the controversy, clearly the democrats have a problem managing their e-mail. fortunately, jordan klepper and hasan minhaj have a plan. >> hasan and i teamed up to help prevent democrats from repeating their electronic mistakes. >> it's hard to secure the e-mails. >> i think cyber-security is going to be one of the hottest issues that faces the next president. >> do you have a cell phone? >> yeah, yeah, i do. >> can i see this? so... ( laughter ) >> i think it doesn't reflect well on the democratic party. >> i can see your cell phone real quick? >> sure. >> so, yeah. >> oh, my god! ( applause )

>> do you have a cell phone? >> yeah, yeah, i do. >> okay, cool. i can see? so-. ( cheers and applause ) >> cool. >> trevor: thanks, guys, good jobs. and p.s., hasan was arrested after that piece. ( laughter ) and jordan was given a stern warning. ( cheers and applause ) now, the democrats-- the democrats responded to this leak by asking d.n.c. chair debbie wasserman schultz to step the ( bleep ) out of here. but the damage was already done, you know. bernie sanders supporters went crazy. the d.n.c. couldn't do anything to calm them down. they apologized to bernie. they apologized to his supporters. then they asked bernie to talk

to his own supporters which is a good plan because if bernie fans would listen to anyone, they would listen to him. >> we have got to elect hillary clinton and tim kaine. ( booing ) this is the the real world that we live in. >> trevor: what? you've got to love bernie sanders. he spent the last year teaching people to dream the impossible dream-- universal health care, trillions in infrastructure, free college, all paid for with historic tax hikes. and now in a room full of the people who love those ideas he's coming out like a disillusioned peter pan. "clap all you want. tinker bell is not coming back. this is real life." ( applause ) and what's even crazier to me is that his own fans are booing him. "we love you bernie!

we'd follow you anywhere." "i think we should vote for hillary." ( bleep ) you old man. even the birds landing on his podium have changed their tune. like what the hell is going on? all day long, the bernie camp, the bernie or bust camp were marching around philly booing everything and the best news team was there to ask just how serious the fans were. >> we wanted to see if bernie's pleas would change the mind of his most hard-corp supporters. you agree with bernie you have to do whatever it takes to stop trump? >> yes. >> which means also voting for hillary? >> no. >> i'm not voting for crump or hillary clinton. >> can you explain to me without doing yoga? >> voting for hillary is a vote to stop trump which is what bernie wants, right? >> absolutely. >> so you'll vote for hillary? >> absolutely not. >> i would not believe what you were saying to me and reject it as not even the point or the

question that should be being asked. >> what question should be being asked? >> um... >> the movement is much more than bernie sanders. >> so you support taking bernie down. >> if that's what it takes, that's what it takes. >> that's some "game of thrones" bleep right this. >> trevor: before i came to philly i was told two things-- cheese steaks and booing. like philly fans are notorious for booing anything. in fact, when we landed in philly, the pilot was like, "ladies and gentlemen, we've landed safely in philadelphia." and the crowd was like, "about oo!" and last night at the d.n.c., bernie fans had the same philly spirit. >> hillary clinton and tim kaine want to build an economy that working for everyone, not just for people at the top. ( ( booing ). >> hillary clinton, because of

her-- ( booing ). >> donald trump? well, like most republicans, he chooses to reject science. ( booing ) >> openly discriminate against gays and lesbians. ( booing ) that's donald trump's america. >> trevor: okay, can i suggest something real quick? let me suggest something. i understand people like booing, but we need some booing clarity. you can't give the same boos to hillary as discrimination of gay people. it's not the same thing. i'll give you an example. in most parts of africa we have two distinct different types of expressions from a crowd. all right. booing is for an individual. you boo a person. if something shocks you or is unbelievable then you go-- ahhh! if someone is on stage and goes, "people are being robbed every day." you're like, "aaahh." and "i am the one robbing you."

"boo." you have to separate them. this is why michelle obama is such a super star. in the midst of all this chaos she stepped into the boos and like a reverse moses she brought both sides together. and what happened last night was in complete contrast to what we saw in cleveland because it showed that there's more than one way to unify people. you know, the republican convention united people in their fear and hatred. the democrats were equally shameless but in the other direction. instead of fear mongering they were hope mongering. >> we must instill hope in every american. >> love and hope. >> our party hears every voice and empowers every person. >> all of us are ready for an america that rejects discrimination and embraces diversity. >> america remains a welcoming nation. >> one of my favorite sayings is

an african saying and it says, "if you want to go fast, go alone but if you want to go far, go together." >> trevor: that's true. that's actually a common african saying but it's kind of outdated since we got uber. ( laughter ) ( applause ) now when we hang out we're more like, "if you want to go soon, my driver kevin is three minutes away." the real test however of the party's unity came at the end of the night when the socialist sex symbol himself got up on to that stage to speak. >> any objective observer will conclude that based on her ideas and her leadership, hillary clinton must become the next president of the united states. ( cheers and applause ) and i am proud to stand with her tonight. thank you all very much. >> trevor: wow. just like that. bernie's 2016 run was over. and it really was a bittersweet

moment for everyone involved, especially for the liberal wing of the democratic party, some of whom were actually in tears as bernie delivered his swan song. there were so many white women trying i thought pinterest had died. ( laughter ) it really was an measure day, which kind of reminds me of another african saying, which translated means these americans are ( bleep ) crazy, eh? we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause ) ♪

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♪ ♪ it's gonna take a bit of work ♪ ♪ oh oh work ♪ ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to the "daily show." now, we already talked about the d.n.c. e-mails which were biggest democratic e-mail scandal since last week. ( laughter ) but every news story has

multiple sides to it and we're going to explore all of them in our new segment "the bad, the good, and the ugly." ( cheers and applause ) joining me are jordan klepper, roy wood jr., and mishelf wolf, everybody. we're going to discuss e-mails. jordan what are your thoughts on the d.n.c. leaks? >> this is bad, trevor. this is really bad. the democratic party played favorites. that's like asking your mom which one of your kids do you like the best and she goes, "i couldn't possibly choose-- it's your brother josh." >> no, trevor, this is good. this is really good. 19,000 e-mails from mostly white people and not a single one of them had the word ( bleep ). i always thought if i got to look through white people's secret e-mailses it would be just all ( bleep ) and groupons. i'm proud of white people. white people need to pat themselveses on the back. trevor, you're half white.

give yourself half a pat. >> trevor, this is ugly. anyone can hack you these days. that's why i don't send anything over the web anymore-- not e-mails, not photos, not tweets. i attach all of my tweets to the legs of actual birds and then i hand draw all of my news and i deliver them in person. ( laughter ). >> trevor: oh, wow. okay, we're doing this. ( laughter ) ( applause ) the detail-- the detail is harrowing. thank you, michelle. jordan, you're still convinced that this is bad? >> of course, this is bad. you know who hacked the d.n.c.? the russians. russia is manipulating a foreign country's election, which is not only scary but it's america's job. chili, nicaragua,itily, portugal, panama, screwing with another country's election is as american as apple pie. which by the the way we stole from the dutch. >> i still say this is good. we're talking about e-mails,

man. e-mails! do you know how much black people would love if their biggest problem was someone reading their e-mail? i know five people that got shot. none of the shootings were preceded by an e-mail. ( laughter ) no news walking home from work worrying about somebody rolling up on them shouting out "reply all ( bleep )!" >> no, no, no! this d.n.c. is ugly. i'm telling you, i can't imagine the scene when hillary found out she had to deal with a new e-mail scandal. it's like finding out you have another kind of herpes. ( laughter ) all i know is that whatever she was holding on to when she heard the news definitely got snapped in half. i mean, it could have been a pencil. it could have been a kitten. whatever it was, there are now two pieces. >> trevor: wow, michelle, that's quite an image, a pencil snapped in two. ( laughter ) how do you guys think this

unfolded for debbie wasserman schultz, specifically? two days ago she ran the d.n.c. and now she's just gone. >> it was bad. it was really bad. this situation was like that michael jackson album. >> trevor: "bad." >> no "dangerous," which was also bad. they basically put debbie wasserman schultz on a donkey and ran her out of town. a mildly corrupt person in politics? she'll never work again. >> it's ugly, and i'll tell you why it's ugly because of this. debbie knows what i'm talking about. you try walking around with a giant mefsz pubes on your head in heat. i mean, 19,000 e-mails and not one hair tip? the woman doesn't have a friend in the world. if anyone out there has any advice on how to not look like a porcupine with a jheri curl, let a girl know. ( laughter ) >> trevor: thank you so much, guys. this has been can "the bad, the good, and the ugly." thank you so much, everybody.

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to the "daily show" coming to you from philadelphia. my guest tonight is is hillary clinton's campaign chairman. please welcome john podesta. ( applause ) >> trevor: welcome to the show. >> it's good to be here. >> trevor: first things first, congratulations on hillary's official nomination. >>it's an historic night. >> trevor: it really is. >> we're in an historic city. the birthplace of our democracy, and we just elected the first woman to lead a major national party ticket. >> trevor: it is a fantastic night. do you think sometimes people forget what a historic occasion this is? do you think sometimes people lose sight of the fact this is hopefully going to be america's first female president? >> well, you know, look, i think we've got a ways to go. we've come a long distance. we were very happy that we

brought this convention together. bernie sanders offered her name, and by acclimation, as the nominee of the party. but we've got a long fight ahead of us. so if we do our job, elect her president, that will be the real historic night. >> trevor: now, when you are getting ready for the conventions-- and i'm assuming you watched some of the republican convention, and you see what ted cruz did-- does any part of you phone up bernie sanders and go, "yo, can i see your speech again, man?" ( laughter ) is there a tiny bit of you that worries in those situations? >> not this time. because he was-- he was with her in new hampshire and endorsed her in new hampshire, so we knew what we were coming into philadelphia expecting. so we were excited to have that endorsement, and we worked hard to bring the two sides together. you know, our campaigns are stronger together, and that means stronger together from the

two campaigns. >> trevor: you really did work hard, though. a lot of people don't know, but you are the man who is really behind this campaign. you are running it from the top. you were responsible for securing bernie sanders' endorsement. what goes into that process? you know, we first met hillary-- our campaign manager, robby mook, and i met with bernie and james sanders and his campaign manager, jeff weaver, just two days after the california primary. it was clear she had secured the pledge delegates we would need to make her the nominee. and from that point forward, we tried to work to try to bring the party together, to put together the most progressive platform in history, to try to find common ground on higher education, on making college debt free, on expanding health care access. and we were able to do that over a couple of weeks, and that led to that endorsement in new hampshire. >> trevor: you do realize the world is banking on your

campaign. >> trevor, i carry that burden with pride. and we intend to be successful you know, michelle obama last night, i think, indirectly-- she didn't mention him by name-- talked about what it means to have people like the obamas in the white house as a role model for the children of america and i think what she was really implying is we don't need donald trump shaping the children of america for four years in the white house. >> trevor: thank you so much. congratulations on an historic night. john podesta, everybody. we'll be right back. my fellow americans... they say we're a nation divided. that's not true. we agree on a lot. like paul rudd. everybody loves paul rudd. i didn't know this was going to happen! you know what else everyone loves?

emojis. no. beer! that's why we're forming the bud light party. just wait till you see our caucus. we've got the biggest caucus in the country! ooooeeeyyyyy! i'm really inspired right now. america has seen the light... and there's a bud in front of it! sfx: crowd cheers, fireworks ♪ and they're off! well, that took a turn. what's the speed limit in here? dad! should we tell them there are more?

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♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause ). >> trevor: that's our show for tonight. join us tomorrow night at 11:00 with more from the d.n.c. in philadelphia. now, here it is, your moment of zen. >> the police if you look over this way-- >> all right, miguel, thank you so much. we're going to cut you off right now. we're going to cut you off right now. we're going to cover right now, boyz ii men, philadelphia's own is here, and they're performing on s