anyou protestors, don't you have anything better to do? get a life! - yeah! - and you boys are the worst of all. all: huh? - you know nothing about romania, and yet you assume america is so much better. maybe romania isn't as nice as america, but it is our home. we are romanian. all you care about is your own stupid circus. - where you going, girls? - the only place we can go. we are going on oprah and then a book tour. - yes, you can all kiss our little white romanian asses. - oh, well, doing our own circus was a dumb idea anyways. - yeah, screw them! - kenny was never gonna get his singing right anyway. - whatever happened to kenny? [all chanting] let kenny stay! let kenny stay! let kenny stay! - all right, people, the father wants his son returned to him. hand him over to us. all: boo! - shut up, romanians. all right, let's go. move! move! move! [all talking indistinctly] - hand over the boy now! - okay, okay. - i mean it, lady, you've got about--

[gunfire] oops. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everybody, and thank you for tuning in. i couldn't be more excited. we have a great guest tonight. rapper big sean is joining us, everybody!

( cheers and applause ) but first, you know how some people say america is a wealthy country? no. it's not. >> what you are about to see is not part of an action movie, it is a new way to fight fires. firefighters in dubai are using jet packs and jet skis to respond to waterside fires. jet skis help them to avoid traffic and water-if you would jet packs help responders hover near the scene and put the fires out. ( laughter ) >> trevor: that's how you know the price of oil is going back up. that's just excessive. awesome, but not something you would expect a professional fire department would do. it's something a rich spoiled kid would think of. that's really something. that's basically what dubai is, when you think about it, the veefa of places. this is only a great idea if your fire is next to the water. that's the only time they can help you because now people will be calling the fire department saying, help, h help, my building is on fire!

the firefighter says, okay, can you bring your building to the river? we have something cool to show you, bring it down! bring it down! ( laughter ) if this isn't crazy enough, you should see their fire dogs. these people go all the way. ( laughter ) let's turn to a man whose whole job is to put out fires. new white house press secretary sean spicer, yet his job is more arguing the fire is working hard for the american people. ( laughter ) now, every single day since the inauguration, sean spicer has been on the front lines of donald trump's war against the media which, by the way, is not a normal thing. keep reminding ourselves, it's not a normal thing. anyway, last night, donald trump said to congressional leaders that he still believes he would have won the p popular vote if millions wouldn't have voted illegally. and, so, like a firefighter in dubai -- ( laughter ) sean spicer flew into action.

>> does the president believe millions voted illegally in this election and what evidence do you have of widespread voter fraud in this election if that's the case? >> as i said, i think the president has believed that on while based on studies and information he has, and i think d i -- we'll see where we go from here. >> trevor: i -- and -- you know -- yeah -- sean spicer probably thinks he looks smooth like those firefighters in dubai but he ended up looking more like this guy. >> fox 5 morning news starts right now! ( cheers and applause ) ( laughter ) >> trevor: oh! i feel like that's the perfect metaphor for trump's presidency so far -- it starts right now! ( laughter ) this is sean spicer's job -- trump (bleep), and he's the guy who's agreed to go out every day with the air freshener.

by the way, not good air freshener. the air freshener that makes things worse. you know like when you walk in and smell the (bleep) and the air freshener. when you walk in the room and go, ahhh! somebody took a (bleep) on old lemons! what's going on in this room?! ( laughter ) but who is sean spicer? who is he? well, we'll find out in today's installment of "profiles in tremendousness." >> i have the most dedicated people. i have the best people. >> trevor: now, sean spicer in the middle of 2016, back when the trump campaign was like one of those buss in india, swerving all over the place, people getting thrown off, other people climbing on, stories of women being groped. ( audience reacts ) but spire spicer turned out to e dealing with the bias media his whole life.

>> the "new york times" had an article about his relationship with the media back to his college days when the college newspaper referred to him as sean sphincter. ( laughter ) >> trevor: college kids are mean, man, because spicer is not even close to sphincter. they just wanted to call him that. sounds like a mascot for a medical school, let's go sphincters! push push push push, yeah! ( laughter ) and college nicknames stick with you for life. yesterday one press reporter wouldn't let you go. >> a sphincter says what? >> what? >> a sphincter says what is this. >> what? >> exactly. ( laughter ) even though he's nicknamed, other things you should know about sean spicer, used to serve in the navy and been in a five

year war with dip and dots. >> for five years press secretary sean spicer has had a public feud with dipin' dots. >> sean spicer criticized the ice cream, saying it's not the ice cream of the future. >> trevor: that's one thing sean spicer is not lying about. dippen dots are not the ice cream of the future, you know why? because there is no ice cream in the future because the world is too hot because donald trump doesn't believe in change, going to gut carbon regulations and today he's signing an executive order slashing the environmental review process for all new development. now i want ice cream! cryin( crying ) i want ice cream to badly -- hmm -- ( laughter ) but if there is one thing -- i was thinking about the ice cream. sorry. ( laughter ) i really love ice cream. sean spicer choose and swallows at least 35 pieces of orbitz

cinnamon gum every day. choose and swallows. now, if that's true, that's horrifying. for orbitz gum. because that's a huge dilemma. this famous dude is saying he uses your product but not in the way you want. you know, it would be like if mario ba tally is like kitchen aide spatulas are the best for sticking up your (bleep)! ( laughter ) to me swaling 35 pieces of gum every day sounds dangerous but spicer is chill about it. he said, i talked to my doctor about it, he said it's no problem. my first thought after hearing that is, okay, cool, but is your doctor donald trump's doctor by any chance? ( laughter ) actually, it really made me think, is it dangerous to chew and swallow 35 pieces of gum? to find out, i decided to test it myself on ronny chieng.

( cheers and applause ) what's up, buddy? what's up? >> trevor: can you chew and swallow all of this gum? >> okay. >> trevor: wait, wait. don't you want to know what it's about? >> free gum is free gum. >> trevor: okay. finish it backstage. we'll check in with you later. ronny chieng, everybody. 35 pieces of gum, just keep chewing the gum. cheap chewing. now we're on the same page. now that you know a bit about who sean spicer is, let's go back to yesterday when spicer marched his belly full of gum in front to have the press corps for his first press corps briefing. it wasn't his first. he came out saturday to lie about how many were at trump's inauguration. alternative facts. we'll keep it moving. yesterday spicer took questions about the most important facts

spacing america and the economy and whether the numbers are important in it. >> likely simple, what is the average national unemployment rate. >> the average? >> the overall. >> whether or not we include the full -- >> i'm just asking you. >> the bureau of labor statistics. >> you accept -- >> nots a question of what i accept. >> it's 42% according to trump. >> it's not just a number to him. he's not as focused on statistics as to whether or not the american people are doing better as a whole -- >> trevor: well, wait, did he say unemployment isn't a number, it's a feeling? this guy would be the first espn reporter ever. what a super bowl, jim, patriots, falcons, sports feeling good in america. back to you in the studio! ( laughter ) the unemployment rate is a number. it's 4.7%, which is really low. the reason the trump administration won't say the actual unemployment number is

because, if they do, in seven months, they won't be able to take credit for when it drops to 9%. but the most revealing part of yesterday's session is when spicer took the media to task for their coverage of the new administration. >> there is this constant theme to undercut the enormous support that he has and i think it's just unbelievably frustrating when you're continually told it's not big enough, it's not good enough, you can't win. the default narrative is always negative, and it's demoralizing. >> trevor: it's so weird that after spending a year and a half watching donald trump bully his way to the white house, now that he's in power, all his team can do is complain about him getting bullied. which reminds me, ronny, get back out here! ronny! ( cheers and applause ) and? >> i swallowed the gum and i feel fine. >> trevor: like completely fine? >> yeah. yeah, you need to lay off sean

spicer. just because he swallowed 35 pieces of gum doesn't mean anything weird's going to happen. ( laughter ) >> trevor: ronny chieng, everybody! we'll be right back! roronny! come on in. pull up a chair. gather 'round. so many ways to invite people to come together. or you could just put out the sabra and let the simple, fresh ingredients do the talking. sabra. welcome to the unofficial meal. ♪ it's crispety. it's crunchety. it's a one-of-a-kind experience. butterfinger. there's nothing like it. a girl with golden locks

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." now, over the past few days of trump's presidency, i've noticed something interesting -- one, we're not dreaming. my arms are very unhappy with how much i have been pinching them. two, broadcasters still haven't figured out which voice to use when reading president trump's tweets on air. i mean, for a moment there, i think we all thought that, you know, tweets would stop once he became president, you know, because once you've made it, you can delegate a few things out. you don't need to keep tweeting when you're president. like how 2 chainz doesn't buy his chains anymore. yo, i ain't got time to care about what they look like, just like sure there is three of

them. it's simple. but trump's tweets aren't stopping. he has a particularly voice. sometimes petulant child, sometimes braggadocious yacht captain. the anchors aren't doing him justice. >> the ratings are in, he tweets well. well vision ratings just out, 31 million people watched the inauguration. >> great meeting at c.i.a. headquarters yesterday, packed out, paid great respect to the washington longstanding ovations. amazing people win. >> merle merle one of the most overrated actresses in hollywood doesn't know me but attacked me last night at the golden globe's, a hillary flunky who lost big. >> trevor: now that's not what trump's trash talk is supposed to sound like. for the next four years are we going to have reporters going, trump tweed, your momma's so dumb she tried to climb mountain

dew, sad. ( laughter ) it's like the police was covered by celine dejon, romantic but not correct. even when anchors read them with personality, sometimes feels like the wrong personality. >> happy new year to all including my many enemies and those who fought me and lost so badly they just don't know what to do, love. >> north korea just stated that it is in the final stages of developing a nuclear weapon capable of reaching parts of the u.s. it won't happen. >> trevor: now you see that last tweet is a perfectly example. that was a terrifying tweet about north korea's nuclear capabilities, but the part of the problem is in an australian accent it doesn't sound threatening. we're on the verge of a holocaust, mate, that will leave survivors poisoned, (bleep)ing up their hair.

this is a real issue we have to grapple with. we at "the daily show" held our own auditions in the building to try to find the perfect voice to treed trump's tweets. please enjoy. >> ho, ho, ho, he he he -- >> sorry losers and hairs but my i.q. is one to have the highest and you all know it. please don't feel so stupid and insecure. it's not your fault. >> anna came to trump tower to ask me to meet with the editors, a friend. >> i am a very compassionate person! with a very high i.q.! ( whining ) with strong common sense! >> the ratings are in and arnold schwarzenegger got destroyed to the ratings d.j.t.! >> frank looked disgusting with his nipples protruding in his shirt before congress. very disrespectful.

♪ a plan in baja mexico practi. >> they're extremely dangerous and shouldn't be allowed on the battlefield. nailed it! >> thank you to ford for creating 700 new jobs in the u.s. this is just the beginning. much more to follow. >> how is abc television allowed to have a show entitled black-ish? can you imagine the furor if there was a show called white-ish? racism at highest level! can i get a question mark? amen! >> he is a great guy that likes me much better as a very successful candidate. >> i've never seen a thin person drinking diet coke. >> i thought when i felt i would win big easily over the fabled

270, 306 when they canceled the fireworks. they knew, and so did i! >> okay, now, try one happy. >> that was happy! >> happy new year! happy new year to all, even those who fought me and lost! >> intelligence agencies should have never allowed this to be leaked to the public! >> i feel like it's too much, is it? >> trevor: i think any one of those would work. we'll be right back. come on in. pull up a chair. gather 'round. so many ways to invite people to come together. or you could just put out the sabra and let the simple, fresh ingredients do the talking. sabra. welcome to the unofficial meal.

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it's crispety. it's crunchety. it's a one-of-a-kind experience. butterfinger. there's nothing like it. versus a lube strip. with a hydrating gel reservoir that gives you 40% less friction. it's designed like no other razor to protect from irritation. sorry, lube strip. schick hydro®. free your skin®. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a platinum-selling grammy-nominated hip-hop artist whose new album is called "i decided." please welcome big sean! ( cheers and applause ) welcome! >> wow. good crowd right there. >> trevor: oh, yeah, an amazing crowd! ( cheers and applause ) the people love you, man. >> you're doing a great job on this show, by the way. >> trevor: tour, i appreciate

you. i'm such a big fan. i have to hold myself from rapping lyrics. do people come up and start rapping every single lyric you have? >> all the time. >> trevor: welcome to the show. >> thanks for having me. >> trevor: congratulations on everything. first things first. bounce back your new single went gold yesterday, so congratulations. >> yes, very unexpected, too. >> trevor: i did want to ask you a serious question and i know this may be a little bit tense for some people, and i hope you won't hate me for asking it -- >> oh, boy. >> trevor: -- but in bounce back you rap last night you took an l which is not something many rappers would be open about. >> right. >> trevor: you say i took an l but tonight i bounced back. >> right. >> trevor: what ls have you taken recently in life, big sean? >> i feel like taking ls is a part of life. it's how you bounce back from them. but a recent l i took, though, i was on -- i was just on jimmy fallon. >> trevor: yeah. >> and my phone was ringing in

ththe middle of me telling, lik, a really important story and the cameras were live so that was, like, for sure an l that i took was my phone ringing in the middle of an important interview. >> trevor: that sucks. >> that is an l. >> trevor: but tonight you bounced back. >> i bounced back. >> trevor: these lyrics, prophetic. let's talk about the album, man. it's a beautiful album called "i decided." what did you decide? >> i felt like my whole life -- my whole life has been -- you know, my whole life changed when i decided. it's been based off decisions right or wrong. >> trevor: right. >> so for the new album, i wanted to do something that showed a little growth. so on the cover of the album, i never explained it too much, but there is a current version of me and an old man version of me and we're parallel. but throughout my life i always felt like i got a second chance at everything somehow. just the way the luck has gone through, my story, getting the record deal, the success i've seen. sometimes elf like i got to the

end of my life and failed at everything -- failed at love, failed at career, failed at, you know, personal dreams, and somehow i got a chance and got to go back in time and get it all right. >> trevor: you are from michigan and you have been one of the people who has been unrelenting when it comes to flint, michigan. >> right. >> trevor: we just saw today the g.o.p. voted to end the investigation and what you have been doing is more on the ground with the people. you have been getting, you know, kids, the health and the water that they need. is this something that likely close to you. what are the things you're proud of and what are you still trying to do in flint? >> i know it's not close to being over. in that situation, i feel like it wasn't a natural disaster. it's something that should have and could have been prevented. it's disgusting to think about the damages these families and even kids have to go through with the lead poisoning. my mom had a degree of lead poisoning, and it was very hard for her to deal with, but she

was able, through holistic care and homeopathic remedies, was able to reverse a lot of the effects of lead poisoning. she was passionate about making sure the kids got proper care. we raised about $100,000 for flint on our own through the foundation to seek the proper care and not just give them water but all these different things. ( applause ) and on top of that, the last song on my album, i'm featuring the flint children's choir to reach out to show support from that side. it's a song called "bigger than me." i was happy to have flint be a part of my album in that which as well, too. >> trevor: you're doing everything big. i appreciate you being here. thank you so much.

( cheers and applause ) "i decided" will be available february 3 and you can pre-order it now. big sean, everybody! we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause ) ( cheers and applause ) ♪ i am the future. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ i provide for my family. i will use my education to help my community. i will inspire our next generation of leaders. i am a college student, but i am only 1%. only 1% of college students are american indian. donate now, and help our numbers grow. ♪