of having to go to rite aid. good night! [applause] >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much! you guys are amazing! wow! thank you so much for tuning in! my guest tonight, executive director of the aclu, anthony romero is here, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) joining us in the studio. he's here just to check i haven't been forcefully the deported yet, but we're good. ( laughter ) first, with all the people taking to the streets protesting against president trump's de facto muslim ban, a lot of folks have been asking the question, where are the

democrats in all of this, and why aren't they saying anything? well, last night, house democratic leader nancy pelosi at a rally in front of the supreme court helped us understand why. >> thank you very much for coming out to -- is the sound working? the sound working? >> no. >> i can hear you. can you hear us? can you hear now? no, that doesn't do any good. does this work better? no. staff? sound people? shall we sing "this land is your land" again till we get the sound working? ♪ this land is your land ♪ this land is my land >> trevor: we are so (bleep) now! ♪ ♪ this is a nightmare is this thing working? i'm talking about democracy as a

whole. is it working? no? i didn't think so! ( laughter ) but, yo, guys, that was a powerful address. it really was. reminded me of martin luther king's "i have a bad mic" speech. i bet mariah carey was, like, yeah, nancy, now try new york's eve! not so easy, is it? i don't see you laughing now! ( cheers and applause ) can i be honest? it's moments like this that make me miss obama. i get the song, but it's all folksy, like remember when obama would break into song? it was way cooler than that. if obama's mic went out he would sing remix to ignition or something like that. ( laughter ) you know what made this nancy pelosi even worse? the reaction from some of the people who were standing there with her. >> is the sound working? the sound working?

i can hear you. can you hear us? ( laughter ) the sound working? >> i don't think it is. ( laughter ) >> trevor: oh! oh, man! i'm sorry. i'm sorry. i shouldn't be laughing. i'm sorry. it's rude of me to make fun of the democrats before giving the president a chance. >> president trump tweeted "nancy pelosi and fake tears chuck schumer held a rally at the steps of the supreme court and the mic did not work, a mess, just like the democratic party. >> trevor: first of all, can we just take a moment to acknowledge the world we're now living in? because you realize, because trump is a president, this tweet is now a government record. you understand that. that means some guy at the smithsonian is preserving that tweet in plastic next to the gettysburg address. that's what he's doing. kids are going to have to learn

that some day in school. you know, kids are going to be like, four score and seven years ago, but fake tears chuck schumer -- by the way, what are mexicans? ( audience reacts ) oh, yeah, it's coming. it's coming. but it takes a certain lack of self awareness for butterscotch fog over here to call the democrats a mess, when he's made the west wing seem less like an office and more like wal-mart on black friday. and i'm talking about the year blu-ray came out. that was insane. the donald is the last person who should be calling anyone a mess considering every day of his administration has been a cluster (bleep). inauguration live, cardboard cake. forgetting to mention the jews on holocaust remembrance day! this weekend the disastrous implementation of immigration and refugee ban. disastrous is one description of

it another way to put it is -- >> work it out very nicely. you see it at the airports and all over, it's working out very nicely. >> trevor: okay. either trump is out of touch or he's just managing our expectations. he's, like, oh, no, trust me, this worked way better than i thought it would. trust me, folks, these are the good times. remember these times. okay? these are the good times. i actually feel like the next four years of trump is going to be him and his people saying one thing and us saying, we have eyes! >> that order signed friday leading to instant chaos and confusion at airports, at home and around the world. >> protests erupted at airports all across the country. >> it cost the department of homeland security, state department and customs and border patrol flat-footed. >> trevor: how do you see that and thing everything's okay? how? either trump is delusional or his aides replaced news coverage

from that scene from love actually. that's what he's watching. this is is a complete unnecessary mess. it's like trump and his team weren't trying to make this thing work. there were reports that, before signing the executive order, trump blew off getting any advice from any of the government. just ask siri. i bet she would have said, you wanna to at that time, (bleep)? you're cratesy. anyone would have told you, (bleep), you're crazy! which is what four federal judges across the country said about the ban. they were there and they were, like, my ruling is -- my ruling is, (bleep), you crazy. although they probably did it in latin. they were like res ipsa lochloca

(bleep). >> president trump fires acting attorney general. >> attorney general sally yates sending a dramatic letter to lawyers saying she was not sure president trump's order was lawful. >> in a matter of hours the president fired her. >> trevor: yes! he did it the first "you're fired" from the trump administration. finally! thank you, jesus! that's the only part of trump's presidency we were looking forward to that he was qualified to do. i bet he walked in and did it like the photo shoot. remember that? >> ready? >> yeah, we're ready. ( laughter ) >> trevor: you ready? ( laughter ) can you hear me? is this thing on? is this nancy pelosi's mic?

i still don't understand why he does it silently. but he did. that's him. you're fired! please tell me that's exactly how he did it. >> sally yates was told by hand-delivered letter that trump was dismissing her. ( audience reacts ) >> trevor: you gave her a letter? the "your fired" guy? dismissed someone by letter? donald trump, that's your thing. that's like if arnold schwarzenegger was leaving, and he was, like, farewell. ( laughter ) that's your thing! donald trump firing people was the only thing we were looking forward to in the trump presidency. i bet the trump voters only voted for that issue. some voters are, like, screw this, bring in mike pence, that's the only reason i voted. i don't know about you, that's

the only reason i voted illegally. otherwise i would have voted for hillary! what a waste! i could have voted for someone else! ( cheers and applause ) i mean, instead of being embarrassed by sally yates, an obama hold over, who is leaving in a few days anyway, he could have wait ford a few weeks on the ban when jeff sessions could have been attorney general. trump had the patience of a toddler who ate his entire birthday cake before the party! who are you?! you know -- ( laughter ) you know, trump's whole campaign appeal was that he would run the country like a business. remember that? he's going to run it like a business. at the time, it seemed like a terrible idea because it's a country, not a business. but now i'm starting to wish he would run it more like a business. because what kind of business would launch a new product without telling the rest of the company about it, without checking it with the lawyers, or

most importantly worried about how it would affect their brand. what kind of company would do that? it's not a -- although i guess trump is in a way keeping his promise. he may not be running "the" country like "a" business, but he is running it like "his" business. ( cheers and applause ) we'll be right back. [john] what if instead of waiting weeks for your tax refund, you can get an advance on that refund? [zombie] an advance on my tax refund. [john] doesn't take brains to see the value in that. [zombie] ha! [john] arghh. [vo] you can get a refund advance of up to $1250 no interest at block. [john] get your taxes won.

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show"! as we've seen, the trump administration's travel ban is confusing a.f. -- for our over35 viewers that means as (bleep). and no one has more questions than muslim americans. here with some answers is hasan minhaj. >> all campaign trump was like -- >> i think islam hates us. total and complete showdown of muslims. they're not coming to this country. >> as president he's banned immigration from these seven countries. everybody is like, yo, is this the muslim ban? >> no, it's not the muslim ban. >> right, right, but is it? you're hasan the record.

this thing on? trump's executive order blocks anybody and even from seven countries in the mea mideast and africa from entering the u.s. as all. this may not be the muslim ban but it's a muslim ban. can he do that? since the order, all my bros are calling me up, dude, this is america, we're the best at american liberty. he can't get away with (bleep). >> that's right, he kent get away with (bleep). even my constitutional bros are like -- >> he may get away with it. >> based on origin isn't. by implement ago ban on people from certain countries -- the muslim ones -- ( praying ) >> basically trump is achieve the same goal. imagine if this dog is a muslim. can't hate this bulldog, that would be wrong, put him in the

somalia sweater and it's totally cool to be like, waterboard that puppy. oh! our hatred of bulldogs was legalized in 1952 when the immigration and nationality act says when the president finds the immigration of any aliens would be detrimental to the united states, it would be inappropriate. huh-oh, i have to do restrictions because national security. historically presidents have justified a lieutenant of stuff with national security. it makes you invincible. trail of tears? national security! chinese exclusion act, national security! the guy who propeace train, oh! national security to the face! okay. so trump's ban is barely legal. didn't he also say something about a muslim database? >> we should have a lot of systems. >> dang!

trump's executive order doesn't mention it. probably because they're problematic and we don't do one. we did do one. in 2002 the u.s. began national security entrance program to require people to register and check in with authorities. it placed 13,000 individuals in deportation proceedings including one lebanese christian dude from texas. yee-haw! and out of 83,519 cases, caught zero territories. 0 for 83,519. worst shooting personal in history. krikris kobach from kansas. number one idea from trump.

bans and registries only affect foreign nationals, so if you're an american citizen like me, nothing to worry about. >> wear are american citizens. >> oh, (bleep). it's japanese american george takay. >> because we look like the enemy, we were treated like the enemy and imprisoned. >> okay so it happened once! the law of interminate has never technically been overturned, but that could never happen today because now we have smartphones. oh, what i just said was so real. it's like i always say, injustice anywhere is a threat to justice other places, also. keep your trks tigh t tight and. next week, the record on jeff sessions. just because someone says something racist, is it? think about it, see you next week.

>> trevor: hasan minhaj, everybody! we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause ) this is lynchburg, tennessee. this is how many people were born here. this many are fifth generation. this is how many are named hiawatha kitty mcgee. he keeps the town dry. they'd prefer it a little wet. this many are proud of what we make here. this is how many will go around bragging about it. this is our town. if you can't get here, just look for one of our postcards. we send them all over. they look like this. (director) what? you knowe your that's not your line, right? (jon) did you know that h&r block will file your 1040ez for free? (director) ahhh...yeah. the line is, "rome."

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>> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is the executive director of the american civil liberties union. please welcome anthony romero! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> hello, trevor. >> trevor: honest question. did you ever think one day people would be cheering for you when you walked into a room, as a lawyer?

>> no ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome to the show and thank you for coming at what is probably the craziest time. >> craziest time, yeah. i have been around this block about 16 years, i've never felt anything quite like this. >> trevor: what does it feel like to have all of these executive orders coming out and to be an organization that is fighting for or against the constitutional loopholes that trump and his people are trying to find? >> a bit breathless but exhilarating at the same time. this president is going down such a far, wrong-headed path. these executive orders are off the charts. this most recent one with the muslim ban is just astonishing that we would have a president of the united states enact an order within a week of him becoming president that is so fundamentally at the core un-american, immoral, unconstitutional ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: now, first of all, i mean, i'm sure you're keeping

abreast of everything but now the administration has come out and said it's not a muslim. >> who are they kidding? >> trevor: not you. >> seven countries predominantly muslims, and then the real smoking gun is that, in the executive order, they carved out an exception for minority religions. then president trump is doing contemporaneous talks on radio, christian broadcast radio, saying that we want to protect the christians. who are they kidding? of course it's a muslim ban. he's the straight talker, just tell it to us straight. you've promised us a muslim ban, given us a muhamad ban, we read it as a muslim ban, then you say it's not a muslim ban? come on. >> trevor: it's funny you say this, but people say you're the aclu, of course you're going against trump but the judges ruled the same thing. i would love to know this, saturday comes, friday night the ban happens -- >> and we never expected this stuff to happen the next day. we saw the executive order,

compared it, thought they'd implement it at some point. we thought anyone with a visa, work authorization or green card would have been allowed into the country, they have been after all. saturday morning, i'm finally getting around to taking down my christmas tree, watching the news and my phone starts going crazy. people are being turned away at airports. i'm, like, oh, no, how is this happening? we rush people to the airports. we are in touch with other organizations helping us identify refugees. they're turning people away who had been given visas to enter this country, and, so, then it's all hands on deck. then we send out lawyers to the airports at j.f.k. and s.f.o., l.a.x., o'hare. >> trevor: when we hear the stories of some of the customs officials and immigration officials going against the judges' orders, though, is that a steph step that's normal? because the judge ruled there

should be a stake. at saturday night 8:00 p.m., we were having an emergency hearing. she understood the equities involved were too great. she understood people were being deported back to countries where they were in harm's way, deported back after helping our government fight the war against i.s.i.s. and terrorists, individuals who worked for our government, our client worked for the u.s. military for ten years as a translator, and they were going to send him back on an airplane and the judge understood that and said, no, wait a minute, we'll hit the pause button. i want to consider this longer term but for now we're going to preserve the status quo. >> trevor: what did the opposition lawyers say? >> pretty remarkable. it was in the courtroom. it was saturday night after taking down the christmas tree, doing a couple of tv shows, i went to the courthouse in brooklyn. the government lawyers were caught completely empty handed. they didn't even know how to argue the statements for the government. the judge would ask very basic

questions, well, how many people are you not allowing out? we don't know, your honor. well, how are you enforcing the executive order? they would look at each other and say, are you going to take that question? then some woman was calling in from washington who was really the voice of government, she was, like, the voice of god, and she was incapable of answering the most basic questions and you can see the judge saying we're going to preserve the status quo, we're not going to deport anyone, send them back to the countries where they're in danger. we're going to preserve the status quo and look at this afresh, the constitutionality of it, in several weeks time. >> trevor: you've done great job this weekend. everyone is behind you. thank you so much. ( cheers and applause ) anthony romero, everybody! we'll be right back. play marian hill. ♪ ♪are you down, d-d-down, d-d-down,♪ ♪d-d-down, down, down? ♪are you... down, d-down, down,♪ ♪d-d-d-d-down, down, down, down?♪

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>> as for my presentation we have pit doll who says brit bare love his voice, always waiting for six p.m. [cheers and applause] >> chris: it's 29 minutes until midnight and based on my call log my wife thinks i'm having an affair with my elected representatives. you know, back when i was a kid. in the is 1900s lego was just a brand of building block playsets that hurt like a bitch if you stepped on them. these days -- they still hurt a lot. these days there's a whole lego empire! there've got legoland, lego star wars, this man's horrifying skin textured lego cosplay: >> nailed. chris: yes. "why? why was i given life?" >> che