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where's the iceman ? he has to be around here somewhere. i can't believe he's gone. wait look, the helicopter. steve. he's alive. goodbye again, i'm off to des moines. no, come back. you can't adapt, you'll never live. i'm not living here. living is having ups and downs and sharing them with friends.

thank you, stan and kyle. see ya ! damn, so much for our plan to use the iceman to take over sweden. what ? what ? nothing. kyle, steve is a pretty good name for that guy. no, dude, gorac is cool because it's original. and besides, you found him. be very, very quiet. i'm hunting crocodiles. can we be best friends again ? i hate having cartman as a best friend. me too, he sucks. oh yeah, well i don't need you guys anyway. you guys can kiss my... uh-huh, there's a king 'croc right there. and what i'm gonna do is i'm gonna sneak up on it and jam my thumb in... hey, get me out of here ! it smells like kenny's house in here !

>> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everybody! my guest tonight is the lead singer of "against me" and the author of the new memoir "tranny." laura jane grace is joining me, everybody! we're going to have a fantastic conversation about her book and her career. before we get into the show real quick, can i give props for you coming out today? it's covenant snow in new york

city! and you came out. thank you so much. ( cheers and applause ) i don't know how to measure it, but it's many of snow. many of snow. ( laughter ) first, remember yesterday rerp talking about senator elizabeth warren, and she had been silenced by majority leader mitch mcconnell by violating senate rule 19, impugning the character of a fellow senator. americans lost their minds. they were, like, have you ever seen anything so crazy on the floor of the senate?! ( laughter ) to which south africa said -- hold my beer. ( laughter ) >> trevor: yea! that was today in the south african parliament where our president had to give his state of the union address, and it is safe to say the union is very

strong. the guys in red, that's the opposition party, basically pulling at senator warren and trying to disrupt proceedings africa style. the security guard in white shirts came in to stop them, a fight broke out. you guise should send mitch mcconnell to south africa's parliament, see how he copes in that world interrupting people. ( cheers and applause ) in the middle of the speech, and the thing with rule 19 -- bop! ( laughter ) let's move from a functioning democracy to the united states where we've reached the end of week three of president trump's regime. yes. this week el trumpo has done so much, you know, with the help of goldman sachs alumni, he began the process of repealing dodd-frank, the law put in place to help prevent another global recession. yesterday, he was criticized by his own supreme court nominee judge gorsuch who said trump's

comments to the judicial system were demoralizing. he better watch, wouldn't be shocked if donald turns on him. donald would be like -- this so-called judge, who is very overrated, a total loser -- mr. president, you appointed him. exactly! he was the president who lost the popular vote. sad! ( applause ) it might happen. just hours ago, the so-called federal court of appeals just upheld the suspension of trump's immigration ban ( cheers and applause ) yeah. which means immigrants, come in quickly! come in quickly! come in! come in quickly! ( cheers and applause ) ( laughter ) you know, we joke when people think that's real -- they're all

gonna come in now! they can't. by the way, just now in reaction to that, trump tweeted in all caps -- see you in court! the security of our nation is at stake! see you in court, like this wasn't decided in court. the judges are, like, who is this idiot? does he not know who we are? i'll see you in court! that's where we are, already. we'll, then, i'll see you -- come out and then we go back in! ahhh! all of the this happened in less than a month. but there's one story that's been ongoing from even before donald trump took office, and that's how the trump family wants to profit off the trump presidency. the subject of our new and presumably ongoing series the white house hustle. ( cheers and applause ) now, it's not a surprise trump is looking to cash in.

we saw this coming when, during the inauguration, he put his hand on the bible and swore to "get rich or die trying. ( laughter ) what is surprising is it has turned into such a family affair. first up is the first lady, melania trump, or as donald calls her, number three. ( laughter ) things are going great for melania trump. she's got trump tower all to herself and just scored a legal victory that showed us what her priorities will be as first lady. >> first lady melania trump has refiled her defamation lawsuit against the company that publishes the daily mail's web web site. she's suing over an article that suggested she once worked as an elite escort in the sex business. >> claims melania trump as one of the most photographing opportunity in the world is a marketing opportunity worth millions and adds the false article hurt melania trump's chances to launch a product line including shoes, jewelry,

clothes, cosmetics, hair, skincare and perfume. >> trevor: if you're wondering what once in a lifetime opportunity she was trying to profit from, i it rhymes with first lady. she's not supposed to profit off being first lady. other than first lady eleanor roosevelt and her line of clothing -- do i have knees? you will have to find out. ( laughter ) but melania wants to sue a newspaper because her reputation is damaged? sue your (bleep)-grabbing husband! seriously? now, even though their lawsuit claimed melania was going to try to use the office to make money she said she has "no intention

of profiting off her position as first lady" which is a shame because she'll never get to introduce her significant line of melania trump's husband repellant -- love is blind, and now so is husband. ( laughter ) melania's muscle ain't nothing to her husband's. look at the department of defense. he's turning them into his tenants. >> the u.s. military is looking to rent space in trump tower, to allow personnel to work alongside the president when back home in new york city. could run over a million dollars a year for the rent. >> yes, the president is now the landlord in chief. like, man, you know what i hate about my landlord? he doesn't fix my pipes and made me innovate iran! is it just me or is trump moving his whole administration to trump tower? melania is there, first lady. the department of defense will be moving in, and the secret

service. trump will be spending so little time at the white house i wouldn't be surprised if he listed it on airbnb. ( laughter ) ( applause ) now, not everything is going swimmingly in trump land. as you know by now, nordstrom stopped selling ivanka's product line and -- ( applause ) -- and after trump attacked them online -- this is true -- nordstrom's stock shot up 4%! ( cheers and applause ) it's the new trump effect! everyone thought stocks were going to go down. now every company is going to claim to stop selling ivanka even if they don't have them. you go against trump, people will be in court, and they're like i know my client killed four people but stopped selling ivanka products so can he have a lighter sentence? all right, it's approved! this morning, trump sends out

the most overworked woman in america, truth scarecrow kellyanne conway, to defend ivanka's brand on tv. >> you asked about ivanka, i visited with her yesterday. she's very successful. go buy ivanka's stuff. i'm getting some myself today. it's a wonderful line. a free commercial. go by it, everybody. i'm going to get it online. >> trevor: going to give a free commercial, go buy it? in less than three weeks, from the president and trump businesses are totally separate to come on down to the white house and buy, buy, buy! buy trump-get dumped! all-out dignity must go! ( laughter ) guys, with everything going on in the world, why is the president wasting his time with a clothing line? like he's a president. you know what? i mean, i talk smack about trump all the time but for the good of

the country, i'm going to help out. i'm going to help this guy out. donald, you know what? you focus on running a country, and i'll help you sell those clothes. how about that, huh new you guys ready for a fashion show? yeah? let's do this, then! let's do this! ( cheers and applause ) ladies and gentlemen, dressed head to toe in pieces from the actual ivanka trump collection, give it up for senior white house correspondent desi lydic, everybody! >> hi, trevor. >> trevor: you look fabulous. >> thank you! the fabric is definitely giving me a full body rash but worth it! >> trevor: beauty is pain, girl! tell us all about this fabulous look! >> let's start with this gorgeous wool coat. now, this is going to protect you from all the elements. you know, snow, rain, bad press, criticism of your family, tapes your dad made on a bus. >> trevor: it's a great coat, desi.

no one respects women's coats more than the trumps. >> right? >> trevor: now everyone's been talking about the b-a-n but let's talk about this b-a-g! >> oh, let's! now, this is the perfect bag for any stylish working woman whose family is going to use the presidency to make it rain! >> trevor: oh! >> also not waterproof. >> trevor: oh, i thought it was. okay. oh, wow! i'm just seeing your amazing shoes right now! amazing! how do you walk in those? >> these are super comfy. so comfy you could spend the whole day helping your dad trample all over the constitution. you won't feel a thing! ( cheers and applause ) no, won't feel a thing because you can't. even though during the campaign you made it seem like you would. >> trevor: you're killing it! >> like trump is going to kill the epa. >> no, sates chemical burn is that you should go.

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>> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." it's thursday, people, which means it's our last show of the week. now, people say "daily" has to mean every day but we use alternative calendars. ( laughter ) here with what to expect, let's go to roy wood, jr. with the "freakin' weekend"! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> that was my weekend dance. look, trevor, let's start local, man. first things first, you have the to forget about the tony montana mountains of snow outside because here in new york it's about to be pretty cloudy because fashion week has designers blowing smoke up each other's asses. they will be presenting overprized clothing line that

will be released later this year. funny, i'm optimistic there is still going to be a "later this year." the world is going to end by july. look, here's the thing, fashion week is not the most popular event for black people because we can't get away with wearing crazy (bleep) like this. can't wear nothing like that in the hood. got a traffic cone on your head! ( laughter ) who does that? i can tell you what's not going to happen. what's not going to happen in the hood is somebody coming up, like, yo, dog, thought provoking, you rocking that ensemble. no, they will be looking at you like this (bleep)'s got a cone on his head! ( laughter ) that's what they're going to say. you think i can't park on your face? i can park on your face anytime i want! ( laughter ) all right, let's bring it back. let's make like old people. let's move down south to florida, all right? down in florida we've got a

high-pressure diplomacy system pushing in from the east and going to make things bad because president trump is scheduled to meet with the japanese prime minister, going to play golf at mar-a-lago resort. japanese prime minister. hello, mr. prime minister. do us all a favor and let trump win, okay? let him win because we don't need to deploy more troops to the pacific because you hit a hole in one. miss a couple of shots. maybe shinzo will lose, but with our luck he'll turn out to be a regular masashi ozaki or hiroyuki fujita. i know what you're thinking, another black man talking about japanese pro golf. all right. all right. i'll prove on. i don't want to beat you over the head with it. ( applause ) i know my japanese golf. now let's make like kim kardashian and go out west. west side! out here in los angeles celebrities are getting ready for the grammys this sunday and

it's going to be a beautiful performance. we have people like adele, bruno mars, beyonce and chance the rapper will be performing. that's my pick for best new artist. he's gonna do it. chance, you're popular enough. just go by chance. we all know you're the rapper. ( laughter ) nobody's getting you confused with chance the jazz flutist. flautist. flautist is stupid. i refuse to say flautist. get rid of the rapper because it will make it hard for you to switch careers later. hello, ma'am, i'm chance the rapper the financial advisor. way too much, bro. that's all the time i've got. i'm roy wood, jr. that's the "freakin' weekend"! >> trevor: thank you, everybody! roy wood, jr.! we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause ) [ music ] we believe the best light beer to have with friends is the original light beer. always brewed with more taste and half the carbs of bud light.

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this is not how we play hide and seek. that's what you think pops. [from the bathroom]: alright, very funny, let me out. and the student has surpassed the master. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is the front woman of the band "against me," and an author whose memoir is called "tranny: confessions of punk rock's most infamous sellout." please welcome miss laura jane grace! ( cheers and applause ) welcome to the show. >> thank you. >> trevor: thanks for coming out in the snow. i'm surprised anybody is here. >> glad i made it. >> trevor: thank you so much for being here. i honestly do not have many incidents where everybody in the

building is clamoring to meet the guest and you're ever one of those people. everyone was, like, can i help you with this interview, trevor? you have a lot of fans. your music is very popular. before we get into the book, let's talk about how hard it was for you from going to being an indy band to signing with a big label. you had fans who came to your shows and stood quietly while you were singing your new songs and pulled the finger at you? >> not necessarily stood quietly but they were very active in voicing their disapproval of our new songs. but that's oddly been the case offour band. everybody's, like, i hate the new record, i loved the like old record. that's always the case. >> trevor: you should make two at a time to confuse people. a new one and then a double new one. is that a weird thing to do as a musician where you go into a space where you have fans who want to own you. they go, we discovered you, you

are ours and you are niche. when you blow up some fans, like, i don't like you anymore, how do you find the balance between being still of the fans and at the same time trying to pay your wills? >> well, i understand it. i'm a music fan myself and i've definitely had bands that as they got bigger i felt like my ownership of them was lost. especially with the scene my band came from the d.w.i. punk, capital lists, you become suspect as you make money from your art. when you come from a scene that teachous to think for your self, then you think for yourself, you're, like, hey, i'm taking everything i learned from you and applying it now. >> trevor: catch twenty two. >> yeah. >> trevor: "tranny," a truly gripping tale you. read stories all the time, auto biographies, but this is powerful because it