♪ black or white, brown or red ♪ >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! thank you so much for tuning in! i'm trevor noah! my guest tonight is democratic congressman adam schiff, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) joining us on the show, he's investigating russian interference in america's election. so we're going to talk to him about that. but let's begin tonight with turkey. you remember how president erdogan was asking people to vote democratically to make him

a dictator? ( laughter ) i know, it's weird. but whatever. they held the vote sunday and the results are in. >> president erdogan declared victory yesterday in a referendum that gives him sweep nog powers. the margin of victim which was slim, 51 to 49%. >> the main opposition party criticized the electoral board for allowing irregular ballot papers to be counted calling for the result to be nullified. >> hundreds haves taken to turkey to protest the results but erdogan remained defiant telling a crowd at the ankara airport we nether see hear or knowledge the political reports you prepare, we'll continue on our path, talk to the hand. ( laughter ) >> trevor: talk to the hand? well, the people just voted to make you a ruthless dictator and you go with sassy neighbor from a '90s sitcom? erdogan wants to be a dictator

but really likes '90s sitcoms. he'll throw protesters and journalists in jail and then be, like, did i do that! the idea of a sassy dictator is so funny. maybe that's how they all started. maybe one day hitler was just, like, oh, heil no! ( laughter ) but let's move on. one of my favorite things about moving to a new country is you get to spend your time learning new things. for instance, i learned, in new york, if water is falling from a building, that's not drinkable, all right. ( laughter ) or probably water. ( laughter ) i learned that the hard way but i learned it. another thing i learned in america, if you want to know who a person truly, is all you have to do is take them to court. no, because everyone has a persona, and then there's who they really are. for instance, tara bollea, or as you may know him, hulk hogan, he

spent decades bragging about his macho swag and huge (bleep). then he got on the stand. >> no, sir, i do not have a 10-inch penis, i do not, seriously. >> you were discussing hulk hogan's penis. >> yeah, because tara bollea's penis is not 10 inches. >> trevor: hulk hogan won that case but, let's be honest, he really lost ( laughter ) no, because if win ago case means you have to put your hand on the bible and say you have a small penis, you lost. ( laughter ) this is not the first time. we saw the same thing with curtis jackson alaska ck alaska 50-cent. for years he said he was out of control and then he was sued and said i don't have that much money. he filed for bankruptcy and then said, i never set foot in the club. oh, by the way, shorty, this year for your birthday, we're going to have a quiet night at home.

yeah. if you take someone to court in america, you see their true colors. doesn't matter who they are. if you took the care bears to court, the carry bear would be on the stand and go, actually, i don't give a (bleep). ( laughter ) i'm not even a bear but, i do have a 10-inch penis. ( laughter ) now, the reason i thought of this, not the bear but the story was because of a story that came out yesterday about far right alex jones. h he's on 150 radio stations, he has 8 million people who visit his web site and a billion views on the youtube. to his millions of followers, he's always been this guy. >> i -- i know all this. i know they're spraying my family. i know we're all filled with heavy metals. the u.n. says if you don't play ball with them they'll spray you

and shut down your weather. my god, sodium fluoride in the water! my god, they founded hitler! i understand what's going on! i read their documents! the hair on the back of my neck is standing up now! arrest them! arrest the bankers! i can't believe it! >> trevor: yeah, he's a pretty chilled out guy. that guy is freaking out. people who freak out about kim trails are funniest ever. what are the planes doing! what are they spraying?! water vapor. do you look at clouds and say, what is that? poison bombs? why is that giraffe floating? what's happening there? this guy must be so fer fide every time he takes a shower. opens the door and says, oh, no, the poison dust is coming out of the bath! what's happening? ( laughter ) like, i don't know who this person is and i'm going to tell you something that's probably going to shock you. a little while ago, alex jones'

wife divorced him. i know. i know, people. i know it's crazy to think someone would leave that. now, it gets even crazier because she also thinks that, for some reason, he shouldn't have custody of their children. ( laughter ) which means, now he has to go to court. which means -- >> the infowars host and legal battle for custody of his children. his lawyers say the fire breather on the web isn't the real alex jones, that he, quote, is playing a character, that he's a performance artist. >> trevor: all right, let me stop you right there. you're not a performance artist. okay, jugglers are performance artists, all righters and they also shouldn't have custody of their children, but, still, they are artists. alex jones is a fake. which, by the way, people have a right to be. 50 cent, billionaire. hulk hogan, have a massive penis. the the problem with alex jones is his act has real

consequences, right. his fans don't think he's acting. when he says 9/11 was a government conspiracy or when mass shootings are fake or a pisa shop in d.c. full of pedophiles, which is a real thing he said, he fans ones to do something about it. one infowars fan went to a pizza shop and shot at people and on top of that the (bleep) didn't even tip! ( laughter ) the scariest thing about alex jones is that fan only had one gun. one of his biggest fans has an entire army. >> you're saying you're fully committed, you know there is no future if we don't take this country back. donald trump, i hope you can help uncrippable america. >> you will be looking at me in a year or two years, let's give me a little time to run things, but a year into office you will be saying, wow, i remember that interview, he said he was going to do it and he did a great job. you will be very proud of me. >> trevor: do you love me now daddy? do you love me now? do you see me, daddy? what's strange is i see why

donald trump is always like alex jones. they basically do the same thing. trump is a character that whips people up with whatever provocative bull (bleep) that works and steps away. drain the swamp, folks! we're going to drain the swamp! then he gets in and he's like, who cares. on the campaign, china's raping us on trade, everybody! then all of a sudden, president of china ate my cake, it's cool, we're good now. ( laughter ) maybe trump is also a performance artist. maybe this is all a scam. maybe if he went to court it would come out like -- wouldn't that be crazy to find out that donald trump the entire time has been somebody else? like, at the white house, he's making speeches outside, like, and what we're gonna do with the wall, we're gonna make sure -- and he goes inside and sits down next to melania and melania is, like, what's wrong, donald?

you seamstressed today. and he's, like, oh, my god, melania, the people are just so insufferable, melania. i can't handle it. i try everything ( englis aristocratic accent) >> then -- (trump accent) all right, that is what i'm going to do about the mexicans! (aristocratic accent) -- just the worst, just the worst. ( laughter ) ( applause ) and that man is a fan of alex jones. attend of the day, the man won't get his children back but at least he has custody of the most powerful child in the world.

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." you know, donald trump has people worried because he's so

unpredictable. no one has a clue what he's going to do next. republicans, democrats, nobody. nobody knows what he's going to do. well, almost no one. because, you see, i've heard tales of an oracle with the magic powers to tell us what trump will do in the future. so i think we should go pay a visit to the man they call sir ahnrop. ♪ ♪ ( applause ) >> greetings. i am the knower of all things trump. i am sir ahnrop! >> trevor: wow. okay, sir ahnrop, i'm here because i've heard that you have the ability to predict what trump is going to do in the future. >> ya mon. ( laughter ) you see, you want to know trump's future (jamaican accent)

all you have to do is peer into the past tweets. past tweet tell you everything trump gonna do. if he hate it in the past that mean he love it now, you just lock upon the crystal ball. >> trevor: just look into the crystal ball? >> mmm... >> trevor: are those tweets? why don't we just look on the phone. >> the data plan no good. crystal ball got free wi-fi! ( laughter ) now listen good, trevor boy, we know president trump love the golf. let me give you an example. he smack the ball. he smack more balls than a dominatrix! he you this would happen because years ago he tweeted this. >> trevor: he tweeted can you believe with all the problems and difficulties facing the u.s. president, obama spent the day playing golf -- wow! i get it! he tweets that the president shouldn't play golf and now all he does is play the golf!

>> you can't do the accent! only i can do the accent! >> trevor: oh. >> i do the accent! >> trevor: is that for jamaicans? >> for fortune tellers. aim professional. you want to do the accent, you do a ball and globe, you go rent one off ebay. ( laughter ) now, where was i -- (jamaican accent) yes, mon, the tweets, the system is perfect. look upon syria. past trump say what now trump do! >> trevor: oh, trump said do not attack syria, if you do, many very bad things will happen! >> mmm, african boy. what trump do now with syria? boom drop a bomb! boom drop a bomb! boom boom boom boom! >> trevor: roy, roy, i get it, man. i get it, roy. >> stop calling me roy! ( laughter ) i'm sir ahnrop!

>> trevor: sir ahnrop? is that like saran wrap? >> it was in the kitchen when i was thinking about this. it was either that or mr. coffee. i couldn't come up with nothing. it's about brandon. you can't be a fortune-teller and be named roy. sir ahnrop tells the future! roy's a mechanic with a scratch-off lottery ticket problem. >> trevor: okay, fine. sir ahnrop! >> thank you. >> trevor: if trump always does the opposite of what he tweets, then what can we expect from him in the future? >> well, the take a look african -- he no like the sharks... >> trevor: i don't get it, past trump doesn't like sharks. what does that mean for his presidency? >> oh, african man -- when they revealed every member of trump's cabinet is a shark. >> trevor: wow, i get it, like they're predatory, they're going

to be preying on the people. >> no, i mean literally sharks working in the white house. >> trevor: all right, man, you know what? this is crazy. i don't know whether i believe any of this (bleep). >> oh, now! oh, i'm getting something from the crystal ball, trevor! michael douglas! donald trump tweeted i like michael douglas! >> look at michael douglas! you in grave danger, michael douglas! you not safe, man! stop smacking on catherine zeta jones and run, man! michael douglas, you got to get out and you got to go! ( shouting ) >> trevor: come back to me! come back to me! come back here! ( shouting ) ( cheers and applause ) mayer hawthorne playing ]

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to the "the daily show." my guest tonight is the ranking member of the house intelligence

committee. please welcome democratic congressman adam schiff! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ welcome to the show. >> thank you, great to be with you. >> trevor: oh, wow, what a great time to have ow on the show as well. you are the ranking democrat of the house intelligence committee. just real quick for people who are not completely sure, me being one of them, what is the house intelligence committee actually meant to do? >> first of all, we neat plea floors below the capitol in a windowless room we affectionately call the bunker where the news is bad all the time. ( laughter ) basically the intelligence agencies come to us and they say, these people are trying to kill us, these people are trying to kill us and, by the way, these other people, also trying to kill us, have a nice day. that's pretty much what it's like, but we oversee the agencies, we try to make sure

that they're talking to each other, that they are getting the resources that they need to protect the country, and that's our primary responsibility. >> trevor: so, i mean, if it's about people on the outside that may be attacking, how does that apply to what's happening now with donald trump? because we hear about the house intelligence committee. we hear it applies to donald trump and the investigation into russia's allegations and the connections to the trump campaign. what is the house intelligence committee's job now as it applies to the president? >> well, up until recently, i think when people thought of our committee, they thought of it in terms of that oversight role and making sure that we were drawing the line in the right place between security and privacy, protecting people's privacy from any unconstitutional surveillance or anything of that nature. but we have this added new and very important responsibility of looking at exactly what the russians did when they hacked our democracy during the presidential election. now, we know that the russians were responsible, we know they

hacked our democratic institutions, they published documents and essentially weaponized data, but there is a lot we don't know about what the russians did and we have the primary responsibility in the house of investigating the whole range of russian actions. the only thing really sufficient to protect our democracy is to -- is to inform ourselves so that we recognize what the russians are doing and that we make this anathema to both parties, so both parties take the view we are not going to allow any kind of foreign intervention, we are going to condemn it, it's going to be a liability for anybody who's the beneficiary of it. that's the only way to truly protect ourselves. >> trevor: now, you say "inform ourselves" which many people can do, but what if the president has chosen to inform himself of alternative facts that states things that don't fit in with what people know? ( laughter ) >> surely you're kidding. ( laughter )

>> trevor: oh, we ask that every day. >> he would never do such a thing as that. ( laughter ) well, you know, we saw just recently what a reliance that a president must place on the intelligence agencies. it doesn't mean you uncritically review what they provide but, when the president decided he needed to take action against bashar al-assad's use of chemical weapons, he did it on the basis of what the intelligence professionals were telling him. when he went to the country to say this is why we acted and when he said to the rest of the world, this is why we had to act, he was saying to me, believe me and our intelligence agencies, don't believe assad and don't believe what the russians are saying. when he undermines the agencies, he undermines himself because others, like the russians, their response was, are these the same intelligence agencies you were just rid calling saying you didn't know what they were doing and now you want us to believe them? this is why it's important for

the president to have respect for the intelligence professionals, to be critical, yes, to not take everything necessarily as the gospel but, nonetheless have respect for the fact they risked their lives to get this information that is really designed to help him and help the country be successful. >> trevor: you traveled recently into europe with john mccain, actually, and you got a chance to speak to european leaders. what is their view? what are their concerns? what are their ideas about what america now means to the rest of the world? >> well, this is a key point, because one of the things i try to always discuss in the context of the russia investigation is why people should care about this. this is not about re-litigating the election. this is about a new struggle that we're in, a global struggle of ideas. it's not communism versus capitalism anymore but its autocracy versus democracy and

representative government. in the world, they want to know whether we will defend liberal democracy. it is this idea of america that is at so much risk now with this presidency. the people around the world look at us and wonder is that the same america? those young people that gathered in tahrir square, many in jail or threatened with jail now, they look at america and wonder does america still speak for me? and that idea is at risk. we need to understand that, and i think a real core part of our investigation is to understand how the russians are challenging that idea and what we need to do to fight back. >> trevor: wow, you feed to get back to the -- you need to get back to the bunker. ( cheers and applause ) thank you so much for being on the show. congressman adam schiff, everybody. we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause ) ♪

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hashtag @thedailyshow. >> there are some that will say, no, the washington establishment sucked him in. >> i hope. >> so okay! [cheers and applause] >> chris: it's 29 minutes until midnight when we're all going to head to the parking lot to watch jimmy get his ass kicked. a twitter beef between espn and the @advil twitter account has been getting a lot of heat today. now normally when espn gets dragged into a pissing match with advil, it's because chris berman hasn't been following the recommended dosage guidelines to manage his bursitis. but this has nothing to do with ibuprofen, the @advil twitter handle is inexplicably owned by this guy: self described patriots fan, abdul rocket ship, i think is his name. rocket away the p