- now hold on, don't do anything foolish! we can talk about this! - you can't accept our love. so then we can only be together in eternity. - no! ike, don't do it! - i [unintelligible]. - ike, please. i know your first love seems like the only love, but trust me, it's not. you have so much life ahead of you. - you who don't believe in true love don't understand. - ike, you need to have a life, have fun. then ruin it by having a serious relationship. - i'm afraid you're too late. are you ready, my love? here we go! one, two, three! ah! ike? - yay! - ike! - well, looks like once again the dog has prevailed. i hope you've learned, kids, that if you don't go with christ, you could end up just like that splattered bitch down

on the pavement. - hey, kid, you need to get off the roof now. - that's cool. i'm done makin' my video anyways. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. (cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome to the daily show. thank you so much for tuning in, i'm trevor noah. my guest tonight a really fascinating man, the professor of neuroscience and author robert sapolsky is joining us, we will have a fun conversation but first a really big day today. president trump is back in new york city for the first time since taking office. yeah, you know what, can i just say, new yorkers throw the worst homecoming parties ever. in fact, desi lydic is at the protest right now. desi, what is going on. >> thanks, trevor, i'm here and

people here have a lot to say watch. would be your welcome home message? >> i don't know, i guess i would tell him to take his [bleep] and [bleep] on his own [bleep] but i don't know if you can say that on tv. >> trevor: wow, i would have gone with welcome back. but you do you. all right, let's get right into the big newsk people. everyone has seen it by now but if case you had a bad eyesight than i've got some bad news about your health care. >> president trump celebrating the house successfully passing the republican's latest plan to repeal, replace obamacare. >> what we have is something very, very incredibly well-crafted. how am i doing, am i doing okay? i'm president, hey, i'm president. can you blef it, right? >> trevor: yeah. even-- even donald trump can't believe he's president. i guess he does relate to the american people after all, you know. i can't believe that guy is

president. i know, it's crazy. it's so crazy. and today was crazy. no doubt about it. because after seven years of foreplay and with just two votes to spare, the house republicans successfully passed a bill to repeal obamacare. which could mean more than 20 million americans would no longer have health insurance. people with preexisting conditions could see a massive spike in their premiums, although the truth is, we don't know any of this for sure. why? because republicans passed this bill without an official scoring of its costs, from the cbo. so the true effects of the bill could be anything. hell, your baby could have to do its own c section from the inside. you don't know. and you know what, that's the problem with politics these days. republicans cared less about the bill's quality than the getting a bill-passed am we know that they didn't like this bill because they kept on telling us. >> it's not the most perfect

bill but nothing is going to be perfect so let's move it forward, let's get it sto the senate. >> is it perfect, no, it is not. >> i made my peace saying okay, it's the best we can get out of this congress at this time. >> we think that it's a step in the right direction. i've been working with my senate colleagues to hopefully improve it in the senate. again i'm just very anxious to see the senate get work on this same project. >> it's something that we can live with. >> trevor: something we can live with? s that he's a particularly poor choice of words. right now there is someone with cancer watching that going who the [bleep] is we? because the big difference between the bill the house passed today and the one that failed six weeks ago is that this one is even worse for people who are most vulnerable. basically republicans said hey, all the poor and sick people, what do you need? all right. psych. >> the current bill faces out the expansion of medicaid and allows states to opt out of the

requirement that covers back services like maternity care, basic aelt steement and even ambulances. >> trevor: how insane. if you live in a red state ambulances might not be a basic benefit any more. now when you get injured you get picked up by a taxi with a bachelorette party on the roof. that is all that is going to happen. whooo, whooo, whooo! you be like, please, i've got to get to the hospital. >> yeah, but first can we stop by mcdonald's. i think i'm going to throw-- and you know what gets even worse, because right now obamacare doesn't let insurers raise rates for people with preexisting conditions. but this bill their rates go up. and if people can't afford their higher rates they get thrown into something called a high risk pool which sounds less like an insurance plan and more like something you find in charlie sheen's backyard. and now, and now, republicans will tell you that they will subsidize the high risk pools

enough so everyone in them can afford health care. the only problem is math. >> the gop bill calls for $8 billion over five years to fund these high risk pools. >> the $8 billion is essentially a drop in the bucket wednesday we're looking at the graphic of the $8 billion that caused a lot of the republicans from nos turn to yes. you see he that still leaves a huge short fall of about $192 billion. >> trevor: yeah, i'm just going to put it out there. if you are short by $1-- $192 billion, just say you don't have the money, right, that's not being short. you can't be like oh hey, man, i left my wag et at home, can you spot me $192 billion? yeah, i'll venmo it back. you can't be short by the gdp of grease, that is not short, that is not the money. by the way, i love that this proposal is called the upton amendment. they might as well call it the kate upton amendment because there is barely any coverage. and with the two parties in

total disagreement, what would be a good way to figure out how much of a disaster for the marn people this bill is? well, i mean you could ask any of the organizations that know nilg about health care, old people or sick people, what they think of it. >> the plan has been panned by most major interest groups including the american medical association, the aarp and the american cancer society. >> the american lung association, the heart association, the diabetes association, the march of dimes. >> the national rural health insurance opposed to this bill. the american thoracic society opposed to this bill, the academy of nutrition and die debtics a national organization for rare disorders and the national coalition for women with heart disease. >> trevor: almost every group is against this bill. the american cancer society. the ama, the aarp, the aa, double battery, triple a, triple h, a hmp m, and presentation h and they know a pain in the ass

when they see one. you know, there are many people who are going to be mad about what happened today. and one group that should be more pissed off than any other is trump voters. because we all remember what we heard from trump during the campaign. >> when you are-- they let do you t they let do you anything, grab them by the approximatesesy. >> trevor: no, no, story, not that one. there is something about health care. >> everybody's gt to be covered. everybody is going to be taken care of much better than now with. we will have great plans, much less expensive. >> preexisting conditions are in the bill. and i mandate it, i said it has to be. >> you will get everything that you want to get. it will be unbelievable. >> trevor: yeah, donald trump is right what happened today was [bleep] unbelievable. we'll be right back.

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>> trevor: welcome back it the daily show. by now, by now we've all seen the terrible footage of that united passenger who, let's just say, found himself in a surprise boxing match. now normally these stories just disappear. but this event was so egregious that three weeks later this happened. >> airline executives will be questioned on capitol hill this morning after recent scandals over the way passengers are treated. representatives of four major u.s. carriers are expected to

testify before the house transportation committee about their booking policies. after incidents like the forceable removal of the united passenger. >> trevor: you're probably not in trouble. wow. congress was so pissed after they saw that video, they didn't just go after united. they called every airline. that's like when one kid gets caught doing something but everyone gets yelled at. >> but united did itness i don't care, southwest, american, go to your room and where the hell is virgin. >> he's on a date trying to change his name. >> trevor: now i will say this, it was great to see congress see this disturbing video and immediately jump to action. but the honest truth is, i couldn't help thinking, if you are a black person in america, it must be particularly [bleep] to see how quickly lawmakers can act after watching one graphic video. i mean think about it.

since that one united video came out, we've since learned of three graphic police videos. one of black people being beaten. one of black people being choked and one of a 15 year old boy in texas named jordan edwards being shot to death. you realize, after the united video it took congress only three weeks. three weeks to call a hearing. after ferguson, it took congress nine months to hold a hearing and was devoted to police brutality, like what the [bleep], congress. black people are supposed to be late, not you, right? and i took the time and i watched the whole airline hearing. and i actually learned something. it turns out as hard as it is, as hard as it is to be black in america, apparently it's just as hard to be a congressman on a plane. >> the problem with the flying experience is across-the-board. >> like delayed for two days, delayed for an hour, delayed for an hour. at the end of the day cancelled. >> your aircraft pulled up to the gate.

you may be ten minutes early or whatever, you have to sit there and wait on the tarmac. >> plane is late, in the late, never explained why. >> baggage fees. >> some charge fees for baggage, some for oxygen, who knows. >> we have had to deal with the tsa. >> you get through the tsa line. >> being the remember flyer i go through the, press lane but now the express lynns are full. >> i can't even sit up straight in the seat, have i to stick my legs out in the aisle because the seats are so krammed together. the comfort of them is very difficult. >> those tiny, tienee awful seats. >> like a civil rights bus from the '60s that have been preserved and propellers put on it. >> welcome to the struggles, my brother. yeah, it reminded me of nelson mandela's famous saying, all we need is deggity and leg room and a small bag of peanuts. and what is the quote for the wi-fi. i want the wi-fi quote. hey, congress, the way you feel when you are in the air, that's how black people feel on the

ground times ten. for black people, america is just one big ass tsa checkpoint. sow me your i.d.. what is in your pocket, hands above your head s that a knife, it's a nail clipper. aes' got a knife. but there's an upside here. because seeing those members of congress react passionly to the perils of air travel trk made me realize that they do have the capacity to care. right? they just need to have a steak in the game. because congress, they fly all the time. but they don't roll with black people all the time. and that gave us an idea for the show. so please welcome roy wood, jr., everybody. come on out, roy. (applause) >> yeah. >> trevor: roy, do me a favor and tell the people what we've got. >> trevor, now we all know that members of congress care deeply about people in airplanes.

so for black people to get justice, we got to abf, always be flying. >> trevor: that's right. that's basically how i feel, from now on black people must always be in airplanes. >> that's right, trevor. that way when a cop shoots a black person, a congress person will read about it and be like oh my god, did you hear someone got shot ion a plane, i fly in planes, that could have been me. >> trevor: i'm not being to lie. i thought that was a crazy item you about i think it may actually work. >> you damn right it is working, i feel safe, i never felt so safe in my life, i may start wearing hoodies again. >> trevor: give it up for roy wood, jr., everybody. things online. then he tried tostitos flavored salsas... ...and realized that not all sharing is easy. oooh, roasted garlic... can i...um...

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behave, the humans at our best and worst. please welcome robert sapolsky. welcome to the show, professor. >> thank you. >> trevor: what i have always enjoyed about you, we met awhile ago, was that you look like a professor. i like that. >> it was a requirement. >> trevor: yeah. you've got a professor face. i enjoy that about you. and what a time to have you on. let's talk about this back, behave, the biology of humans at our best and at our worst. this was ten years, this book took you ten years to write. and despite being a pes mist you have confessed that you have learned what gives you optimism is basically that there is an idea that we can learn about how to better the human condition, how we can get human beings to do the right thing as opposed to the wrong thing. how did you get to that

conclusion? >> well, i think the starting point is you know, we are a-- violent species but at the same time we're also extraordinarily altruistic and compassionate onement and the main thing that gets at it is it really depends on context. cuz in one setting, you fire a gun and it's like the most appalling ak possible. and in another, it's heroic and self-sack ri figure. you put your hand on top of someone else's and that could be deeply compassionate, or that could be a betrayal, our behavior is incredibly context exet ir, if you get the context right we are a nicer species, than we are a awful lot of time. >> trevor: what does that mean for humans as a whole. because if we go, we are nice and it depends on the context, does that mean that in some context donald trump is a nice person? >> no.

>> trevor: oh. (applause). >> trevor: oh, okay. what does. >> on the average. >> trevor: i like that, i like how nope, nope, nope, nope, not at all. what does that mean for us as people though if you are trying to decide for us. i mean i have read through most of the book and what is tough to understand is what it means. some people have arguments that i read all the time where they go well, you know, some people are genetically predisposed to committing crimes. people use that as a dog whistle for racism, you know, black people like committing crimes and that is what they are always going to do as somebody who studies neuroscience and the biology of it, does that make any sense. >> that is right around when you get apoplexie over like oh, come on, what century are you functioning in. in terms of genes and behavior, genes don't cause behaviors, genes don't determine behaviors because genes work incredibly differently in different

environments. and it basically at the end of the day, is use will to ask what a gene does, what does it do in the environment in which it has been studied. >> trevor: what does that mean for the u.s. system. let's go into the book. you talk about how the criminal justice system, fringes, in america, is broken in a way that i have never thought of before. and that is the neuroscience of it is broken. what does that mean? >> well, sort of the core of the american legal system in terms of thinking about like how the brain works is basically if you are so organically impaired by some brain disease that you can't tell the difference between right and wrong. >> trevor: yeah. >> that's a pretty good mitigating circumstances for trial. and that is something called the mcnaughton rule, the legal system is based on neuroscience, it's about 170 years old. >> trevor: what does that mean for today's legal system then? >> well, you are dealing with a system that is medieval in its knowledge of human behavior.

>> trevor: right. >> probably the word that is most important is sort of issues of volumeician where-- volitian where you have people who know the difference between right and wrong yet in a particular moment, a moment of particular arousal, particular stress, particularral neurological impairment, none the less, they do what they know to be is the wrong thing. and that is something, for example, you would see when there is damage to a part of the brain call the the frontal cortex. people there with the frontal cortex are the coolest part of brain, they have self-control and emotional regulation, gratification postponement. and if your frontal cortex is damaged, you know the difference between right and wrong and you say i'm going to reach right here because this has the better payoff and at the last second you go for the wrong one. >> trevor: were you grabbing the pussy there, what were you doing? i didn't know what that-- that seems like it, you know it's wrong and then you-- you grab for that.

>> please, sir, i'm a professor. >> trevor: forgive me, grabbing the vagina. i apologize. america is very politically polarized at this point. and in the book you talk about how scientifically you've discovered or the research has shown that america is at a point where progressives and conservatives actually have brains that are wired differently. >> yeah, which either countses alike-- you think? or is very informative in that it's got nothing to do a lot of the time, with sort of the issues that one would think are going on in people's heads when they come up with political stansas, instead things like on the average, social conservatives are made more anxious by novel tee than are

social progressives. they're made more anxious by ambiguity. they're made more anxious by whatever is coming in the futurement on the average, social conservatives are more worried about germs and hygiene. you look in the bathroom of social conservatives versus progressives, and the former have more cleaning items in there. >> trevor: so democrats are like [bleep] washing my hands, and conservatives are like wipe twice. >> before and after, yeah. and,. >> trevor: that is such an extreme idea. because it's frightening. because it makes me then go are you saying that in america there is a possibility that it will get to a place where people are no longer politically making decisions but rather reacting to who they are as human being? >> no, i kind of think that's always the case. it is just your biological organization organisms. there is biology rumbling along all the time. there is a finding just like one

of my favorites in the whole book. you take somebody and sit them down and you give them a questionnaire about their political standses an if they are sitting in a a room with a smelly garbage can people become more politically conservative about social issues. it doesn't change your politics about economics or the like trade balance with nepal or any such thing. but if you are kind of having a part of your brain that tells you that something smells kind of unnerving and disgusting, you are more likely to decide that somebody else's lifestyle is not only different but wrong and disgusting. >> trevor: i'm just going to go away from this with republicans have a smell around them. thank you so much for being on the show, professor. (applause) behave is available now. robert sapolsky, everybody.

>> trevor: that's our show for tonight, thank you so much for tuning in. now here it is, your moment of zen.