uh-uh. yeah. kolchenko's down. that is so gross! archer, mumbling: not as gross as shrimp tape! kelp tape. oh, and, lana, promise me you'll try it, especially after this. it really pulls the toxins out. oh, and please read "the unleashing of me," and please, please, please don't beat yourself up over this! you are a sexy, empowered woman! oh, and speaking of, wish me luck on my directing career, which is gonna be-- 'on't say it! ♪ amazing! i'm out! [groan] 'ow long she say this s'uff lass? four hours. ha ha ha ha! [mumbling] oh, my-- you're getting off on this! and?

>> tevor: welcome back to the daily show. thank you so much for streaming in. my host tonight, james davis is here everybody. let's get right to the big scandal that is rocking america's first family. >> kim cardion taking to social media that shut down rumors surrounding drug use. the realities posted a picture monday night where fans were quick to notice what appeared to be two lines of a white substance on a table in the background. cardion was quick to reply saying it was sugar from dylan's sugar store but late last night she realized it was wrong. >> this table in the background is a marble table, you guys. come on. >> yeah, come on guys.

yiek why would she do cocaine when she's married to human cocaine. come on guys. >> think about it. kanye is like i'm going to open a fashion shore that's a space ship. >> she's like honey calm down have some cocaine. kin wasn't doing cocaine but i love how her excuse was that it was sugar from dylan's candy bar. that was her excuse. i don't know if you ever shopped there. it is as expensive as cocaine. pea lospeople their homes. people walk around the street hey man you got some gummy bears [bleep] man. so that happens. let's move on to the big story today. the russian investigation. which is imred's big store and will be tomorrow's bi big story. this is the story for the rest of our lifetime. at the funeral thinking about

grand ma. snap, you guys see this new russia trump story. look at that. 24 hours. most people including many prominent conservatives have agreed that donald trump, jr. clearly colluded with the russians. i know they're all walking around pretending like we didn't know what collusion is. on the same page here. here is the definition. collusion is secret agreement or cooperation especially for an illegal or deceitful purpose. that's what donald trump, jr. did, yes. reason we know this it was clear. super clear. the russians say hey we want to help your dad win the election. and he replied, i love it. and they met in secret. we all know this. the e-mail sung line gav subject away. e-mails are more subtle in their approach. they don't say fix your tiny penis, they say do you want to

pleasure your lady more. and then you say i love it. [laughter] so most people agree that it's collusion. or at the very least it's very shady. most people don't work at fox news, the entire reason for being seems to be defending the trouble administration. for them junior's rushing to present the highest level challenge there is, to defend the undefendable. this is the moment they've been training for. ladies and gentlemen, this is the don-cathalon. welcome to what will be many don-cathalons. the first event tonight, the hillary deflection where participants do all they can to take away attention from don, jr. back to last year's nominee. nobody performed this feat of

distraction than jesse watterk. >> hillary accepting million dollar checks from saudi tycoons. and bill clinton being paid half a million dollars by the kremlin bank at the same time hillary is allowing uranium to be pushed to the russians. what about the dnc server. >> why are we worried about the president of the united states when we could be talking about an unemployed grandma of the forest. yes. so many questions. yes. and who was the lady she was meeting in that forest? and who is that little man on her back? yes. the russian babies. are they? i mean jesse crushed that event. but many people preferred the next one. a giant leap. and the winner, someone who could come up with the most unlikely conspiracy theory. and so obviously the gold metal

went to none other than sean hannity. >> the meeting between donald trump jr. and a russian lawyers that's spending the media into an eating frenzy again could have been set up by democratic operatives. you won't catch this on the other news channels. >> tevor: you're right, you won't because [bleep] really the democrats set up this meeting. tricked don jr. colluding with the russians and then never used it? that was the plan? it worked. we got don junior with the russians. should we leak it now. no, no, hold, hold. hillary's lead is down two points. should we leak it now? hold, hold. we just lost the election. hold, hold. the time will come. let's move on to the next event of the don ca don cat lawn.

>> this is evidence of collusion. point to me a statute that make it a crime to collude with a foreign government in american political campaign. doesn't exist. you won't find it there. now maybe there should be a crime and maybe congress some day will pass a law the president will sign it. but so far, it's not a crime. [laughter] >> possibly incorrect but genius. don might not have committed a crime but we can all admit he did something wrong. therefore lots of things you can do that are not illegal but are still completely wrong. like taking an elevator to the

second floor or pretending you don't need a wheelchair so you don't have to wait in line at disneyland. or pretending to be a comedian when you're just a guy from kentucky. you're all looking for that last one. all of these are worthy participants. but last night there was one competitor, one competitor of people tuned into fox news to say and it was a something like head man sperm of donald j. trump. >> this is my particular away. someone has information on our opponent. things are going a million miles an hour. i want to hear him out and play it out and see what happens but people are trying to reach out to you all the time with this. one sent me an e-mail. i can't help someone sent it. i read it and responded accordingly. i would have read it if you start souring through the stuff. it was a waste of 20 minutes which was a shame. >> tevor: i love this. he's totally confessing but with

the tone of somebody who thinks he's giving an alibi." look, i went into the bank, i shot everyone, and i took the money. so unless you have something on me, i guess i'm free to go?" [applause] yeah, i did it, okay, i did it. yes. [cheers and applause] they were leading up to the most important part of any routine, the dismount. >> what about the time line of this. this is pre for exampl week wic. i think the west of the world was trying to build up this narrative about russia. >> . >> tevor: yeah. no one was talking about collusion before we did it. that's kind of how that works. first you do the thing and then the people start to talk about it. it's like someone saying why are you blaming me when [bleep] wasn't even talking about aids. come on, come on. that wasn't a thing. why are you blaming me. the monkey made a move and i replied in the normal manner.

the monkey made a move and the monkey was like what do you think and i was like i love it. [cheers and applause] i didn't do anything wrong. what do you want. all of these people may be choice ochampions on their own m cathalon has their own sport. you realize everyone at this smoke machine belongs on that podium. >> i said yesterday -- if you're charged with collusion it's the wrong spot. nothing's there. >> nothing happened. nothing took place. >> this is the kind of thing that happens all the time in politics. >> i blame paul manafort for all of this. >> what the heck is she doing in the country. >> he rooks like som looks likey boy band manager with that outfit. he's very suspicious. >> during the campaign season you get a long of phone calls. i got some dirt on your

opponent. >> it happens every day. >> there's no evidence of collusion here but there's lots of evidence of delusion. of evidence of delusion. >> tevor: i thin it's so... quiet. of evidence of delusion. >> tevor: i thin is it, too quiet? it's awful. yeah. feel at home, pretty much wherever you are. t-mobile is america's best unlimited network.

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see that? yes! i'm gonna just go back to doing what i was doing. find your awesome with the xfinity x1 voice remote. >> tevor: welcome back to the daily show. no last year the republicans intent into power with a clear agenda. repeal obamacare, pass tax reform and spend on infrastructure. after six months in power they've got nothing to show for it. sort of like ben carson in a rap battle. my name is doctor ben. >.sorry your three minutes are . we turn to my good friend, neal brennan, everybody.

>> i come on heres a real sour pulse but right now it's awful. >> tevor: what's up. >> i thought everybody would go badly but the trouble administration has a small group of determined people to make a huge difference. simply put, trevor been, 9 resistance is working. >> tevor: they feel the republicans are not doing a good job. >> i know why they feel that. drieks can'democrats can't writ. >> they are trying a new slogan. have you seen the other guy. that's it. have you seen the other guys. >> have you seen the other guy. that's the message of your party. that's like a quiznos slogan was like hey at least we didn't hire

a pedophile. >> tevor: i'm confused. if it's not the democrats who is resisting the republicans. >> the republicans. >they're the resistances. they kill isn't get a goal pass. you're the only team on the field but you're still losing. republicans set off a chain of events where we were both the mouth and the trap. jeff sessions lies for no reason. then after he recused himself his second in comabd appoints a special prosecutor to investigation trump for the whole thing. it's like a bar at a bar himself. do you want to go over to my place, wh sure. well too bad, i'm homeless. [laughter] >> tevor: this is a good thing with the republicans in such

disarray, this would be the perfect time for democrats to step in and capitalize. >> no. don't do anything. democrats, pretend you're on the subway in a drunk asshole just got on the train. keep your head down, no eye contact, wait for the mid terms, it's only two stops away. [applause] i know you're scared democrats waiting for the republicans to strike but they can't get their blan[bleep] together. trust me, miles away sitting in the whitehouse watching fox news with his sharp junk flopping all over the cushion. >> tevor: wait, are you suggesting that the democrats just sit back and do nothing? >> yes. that's exactly what i'm suggesting. democrats, you don't need to resist, you need to relax. do you hear me, chuck schumer go

parasailing. elizabeth warren looks like you always want to make your own gelato. the point is don't resist, relax. the reuk republicans are the hes of the resistance. mimmimpmitch mcconnel a heroux. jeff sessions a small hero. and the biggest hero at all is donald trump lying with his government, he's the true leader of resistance. [cheers and applause] in fact, he might have to wear a pussy hat. >> tevor: nea

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[cheers and applause] >> tevor: welcome back to the daily show. my guest tonight is a comedian, executive producer and writer for comedy central's new show hood adjacent. delete body camera first. >> we've gate cameras on top of cameras. camera, camera, camera. camera. camera. all over this thing. you might also know a white

woman -- white woman get pulled over the least. you never seen that before, girl? exactly. james did it. please welcome james davis. [cheers and applause] >> welcome to it. >> oh-ho. >> this is amazing. i'm here on daily show. you're killing it by the way. >> tevor: thank you. >> [cheers and applause] >> tevor: thank you very much. you are killing it with your new show. let's talk about that hood adjacent. for those with no cleu, what does that mean because i like the title. hood adjacent. do you know what it sounds like. it sounds like someone would call a place they want to sell near brooklyn but not quite in brooklyn like a hipster. if i heard but not really.

if i hood adjacent. that's what it sounds like. >> that's kind of how the phrase was born. it was me telling my tbrenldz at at -- friends at private school where i lived but in a way they weren't afraid to come see me. i'm in the hood, adjacent. like you're not there. you're next door. like where the movies happen. i don't live where they shot the scenes. i live where they kept the craft services. you can feel it but it's not here. it'it's yawnlder. >> tevor: your friends visit you. >> yes. i had a friend matt. very white jewish. i went to his barmitzvah. he lives in manhattan be. for my birthday he came down, excellent over. he got out of there in the morning. >> tevor: do you know what, at least he came. >> he came. he came through. >.hood awe joint is like imreur

playing with sketches. you're stand up but going around challenging. like just explain the little clip that we played. that was from one of the scenes. what does that mean? >> so we had an episode. one of the skeins t scenes to te activism is we don't have the solutions to the complaints. i address the haters of black activism. i'm like okay do you want solutions. i'm going to give you solutions. i'm a comedian so i'm comedically facing problems that black men face while driving. i'll explain what driving while black is and that's my way of, you know, discussing the flanldeflarndcastile. one of my things is how you broke down. that moment. the silence of the nra. >> tevor: because we're using our platform. >platform. [cheers and applause]

>> so that's trevor noah. i love that because it's really funny. you change topics in every single episode. you're moving through. where i come from. i'm appealing more to i guess the hood of the black audience because i'm being biographical where i come from. >> tevor: you play a lot of golf. >> i just shot a commercial for the pga tour. >> tevor: oh, wow. i got to, i'm nice at that. oh wow. i don't know golf so i don't know what you just did. >> i just killed it. >> tevor: you stood up and then you dabbed. i don't know what that was. i prett>> i pretty much showed e

away. anything else i would have knocked over a cup. >> tevor: when you were growing up did you bleanl like being -- dream like being like tiger woods. >> yes. this is the plan. i wanted to be in the pga tour then college happened, had fun, lost track. an actor, addition, where did those con from. want to be a comedian then became a writer now i'm using everything, all my passions are in this show. so we're talking about golf, friends of gang members so i'm going to show you the human side of the gangs. i'm talking about black girl magic. so i'm really just breaking down things that are nuanced within the hood and explaining it to the adjacent. but then also talking about things in the adjacent or the mainstream and making them have topics for the hood. i want the hood to know they can go to the golf course. they can go to a liberal arts college and enjoy themselves.

[cheers and applause] >> tevor: nothing's off limits. i'm excited for you. i remember he when you were just kicking the show off. i'm loving the episodes. thank you for being here friend. >> i appreciate it man. >> we'll work on things together. james davis on comedy central everybody.

>> that's our show for tonight. join us tomorrow night at 11. now here it is, your moment of day. >> in the whitehouse the other day described on another network. the president watching a dvr recording of fox and friends hours after it ran. while others were around, just checking you, i mean good for you we like the ratings and like