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comedy central from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. (cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome to the daily show, thank you so much for tuning in, i'm trevor noah thank you everybody. our guest tonight virnlgio-- virginia governor terry mcauliffe is joining us, everybody. going to be an interesting conversation. but let's start tonight's show with russia. we're not going there, we're just going to talk about it. you may not know this but russia is just nine months from a presidential election of its own. and i don't want to interfere but there is one thing that i have to tell you about. >> new this morning, russian state media is warning fidget

spinners are a u.s. invention that undermine the country's president. >> state run news outlets report the toys could be an american plot to zombie fie fie yung roushevens procreme liss news outlets say russian opposition parties were trying to lure young supporters with fidget spinners. (laughter). >> trevor: sorry, what? what were we-- yeah, fidget spinners, i got distracted. russia is banning fidget spinners. and just like that there goes russia's reputation as a fun country. the reason russia is banning fidget spinners is because at an anti-putin rally, a bunch of people were giving out free fijity spinners, so putin was like fidget spinners means you're against me. and putin's opponent just went with it, yeah, yeah, everyone

with a fidget spinner supports me. so now according to vladimir putin, everyone in the world with a fidget spinner opposes him. which is a great excuse for school kids, if you think about it. hey, young man, put down that spinner, like not until the russian people are liberated from the-- regime, yeah. this is genius, it's genius when you think about this, right. every other resistance movement should have done the same thing, tie yourself to a popular fad and make it look like it's bigger than it is, like nelson mandela should have been out there giving a peach, pokemon is above fietding the oppressors, they cannot catch us all. they can never. (applause). >> trevor: but it turns out fidget spinners aren't the only thing russia is toying with. >> this morning a striking new revelation, a white house official telling nbc news president trump had a previously undisclosed conversation with

russian president vladimir putin at this dinner held for world leaders at the g20 sum knit ham wurg, germany. >> video shows mr. trump taking the seat across the table from mr. putin and first lady melania trump, later on mr. trump reportedly left his seat it go to speak with mr. putin for nearly an hour. using mr. putin's translator. >> trevor: i'm starting to think donald trump never wants us to stop talking about russia. because then we would start talking about the fact that he doesn't know how to be president. like the funny thing is we can talk about both, donald, we can talk about both. i'm not even upset by this. i just don't understand why he would do this. it's the perception of su that are you colluding with russia, just don't have a private conversation with the president of russia! it's like, if there were rumors that you have sex with sheep, even if they are false, just stay away from sheep. just stay away from sheep for awhile. (applause)

stay away. and i know, i know, i know some people would be like that's not fair, man. so now i can't go to the petting zoo any more. i'm sorry, you can't, no, you can't. well, so i have to give away my season ticket. >> trevor: yes, you do, you do. and by the way why do you have season tickets to 9 petting zoo. this is why questions are rationed about you, man. just stay away. you know what i have been thinking, maybe this is our fault. maybe we have been parenting trump the wrong way, because clearly if we tell him to stay away from that bad boy vlad, we're going to push him right into his arms, that is a real picture, by the way. like maybe we should change our strategy. donald, we know we can't stop you from seeing vlad but like if you have going to see him at least do it at home or bring another american with you. just, just so we know that you are safe. you know, someone like tillerson or mcmaster or jeff sessions, he's the perfect size, you can keep him in your wallet, you know, just keep him there, pull him out. and by the way, by the way, that

bad boy putin, he knows the trouble he's causing. because just listen to how he trolled the u.s >> you met with donald trump recently. it would be interesting to hear your impression of him as a person. >> you know what i can say for sure, i think i already said that at a news conference in germany, is that he is quite an open person. >> trevor: yeah. trump is an open person. that is exactly what we are worried about. remember the last time he spoke to the russians, he accidentally spilled israeli state secrets, that is what he does. right now the best we can hope for is that trump is so fall of bs that he is too unreliable to be spied on, you know, because we know will say anything to make himself look cool, putin will be like so doned a, how many nuclear sub marines do you have now, he will be like let me tell you, vlad, we have literally millions of sub marines. >> no, no, donald, no, no,

donald, no, that can't be right number. >> i have heard we might vay sub marine under this very dinner party right now. unbelievable. >> i'm starting to miss hillary, oh my god. this guy. >> trevor: look, what is clear is that at a minimum trump and putin have a very close relationship. which when are you dealing with a former kgb agent can be a dangerous thing in itself. in fact, jordan klepper has more. >> reporter: the news has been all over this trump-russia story like flies to borscht. >> russia scandal. >> the russians are attacking our country. >> to figure out what the hell is going on i met with an e-kgb spy jack basser kee, born albrecht deet rick in east germany, recruited by russians, spy odd on the u.s., later defected and never forgets an anniversary. i was meeting him at a location no one would ever suspect.

>> jack, you are ex-kgb. >> i am, i was. >> that was the cia, the fbi, the nsa, what have you all rolled up into one organization. >> in other words, he was a mother [bleep] russian spy. >> what were your weapons of choice. >> there were no weapons. >> there is really no gadgets involved. >> what about that drone. >> that is not mine. could be yours swns that our drone. always looking for a new interesting-- can we just cut the drone, we need to get rid of the drone. >> maybe there were drones but basser kee did have a few spy techniques he was willing to share like how to check whether your mail was open. >> you open it with steam and then you close it again. >> marking a wall with chalk to secretly communicate. >> casually go around here and bingo, there is the sign. >> and how to burn paper with minimal smoke. >> they taught you how to burn

paper. >> yes. i think i know why we won the cold war. what the [bleep] kind of spy was this guy? >> i was trained to be sort of the intellectual spy. the guy who befriends other people, finds out about who they are and can maybe potentially be recruited, gets into places of employment where they can have access to secrets and so forth. >> part of becoming a spy is just building relationships. >> right. i will cultivate you over time, we will become friends, we play golf, we play tennis and eventually you will let your guard down. >> now this sounds familiar. so how in bed is trump with putin? like just the tip or even more, something that we are-- where no one is comfortable withness i think he has been playing too his hands in some way. the end game is to create destablization as much as you can. and amongst the western camp, to make russia relevant again. >> make russia relevant again.

>> great again. >> you can put it on a hat, wouldn't even have to change the color. and your target doesn't get any easier as trump, you just need to be his bff and he's orange putty. >> you become friends, you get to know people. >> treat him to a fancy vegas dinner. >> the behind the scenes video shows then businessman donald trump hanging out with the man now at the center of the russian controversy 6789. >> make him part of your birthday celebration. >> i can't believe you are turning 35. >> and ask him to sit next to you at a state dinner. >> what is the difference between spying and dating? >> oh, they have a lot in common. you just walk into this bar, right and i'm sitting here, hi, how are you doing, oh, you like vod characters i like vodka too, what do you think of the russians, you strike up a conversation. >> kgb was like tinder before tinder. >> how could the key to this russian scandal boil down to loose lips and mingling. well, our floozy president might give intel for free but i'm a

safety deposit box full of secrets. >> how would you get information out of me. >> let's have a few drinks. let's loosen your tongue a little bit. >> i'm not that easy, okay. i can hold my liquor. >> well then, are you one of those impenetrable sons of bitches that i can't deal with. >> i'll drink to that. >> good for you. >> get ready to be disappointed, mr. ex-kgb spy. >> i could use it for my health. is that a problem. >> doctor say i have hpv shing els. >>s notrofia. >> when i was in college i worked as a waitress at chip n deals to just try. >> you said waitress, what? >> [bleep]. >> here say funny thing, i joined mambla because i thought it was mensa. >> do you know what they do there? >> nambla. i type in my password at that point at an atm machine and that is going to be my birthday which

is march 7th, 1984. >> i sunk a boat, some dudes boat, i sunk it. >> i think, i think you need to have some more drinks. >> maybe america's overreacting. if putin is anything like this guy, we're fine. he's fun. >> all right, now i got something on you. >> what's that. >> nambla. >> i see what you are doing. you are becoming my best friend. >> yeah? (applause). >> trevor: thank you, jordan. we'll be right back. (quiet chatter) (soft gasp)

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i'm gonna just go back to doing what i was doing. find your awesome with the xfinity x1 voice remote. >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show," we've all been through a lot of emotional turmoil in the past few months but thankfully there is a way to express it is it all. emojis. in fact, just this past week apple released a whole batch of new emojis plus emojis are now getting their own movie and mund was even world emoji day. yes. which we can all agree was a thumbs up fireworks. for more on its current state of emojis we turn now to michelle wolf, everybody. (applause) michelle wolf, i know i had a good time, did you have a good world emoji day? >> no! i didn't. as j.lo would say in the 2002 blockbuster movie enough, enough. enough with the emoji. >> trevor: come on, michelle, michelle, people like emojis. >> oh really? cuz last time i checked i'm

people and i don't like them. emojis are stupid and stupid people like them. like this guy. >> we text and we talk every night i call home and we talk. because they done think of me as an emoji guy i go crazy on emojis, i do seven or aide of these things. i will throw those out there and my kids and my wife, i am just not the emoji type person so they think, so that is why i just overkill on the emojis. (laughter) >> oh, paul, and then when paul ryan's daughter text him hey, dad, how can you support a cruel health-care bill and a president that drags about grabbing women by the pussy, paul ryan is like shrug, monkey covers eye. >> trevor: michelle, i think i know why you are really upset, it is because there is no redhead emoji. >> you're dod damn right! there is no redhead emoji.

since he there are emojis for everything else. they have different skin tones, a woman in a hijab, they even have a dine stawr. dinosaur, when you would text a dinosaur, our relationship is dinosaur asteroid, i don't need to give people another way to dump me. i would rather be dumped the old-fashioned way, being abandoned at the olive garden. i thought we were going to be family, jeff. >> trevor: it is just a picture of a dinosaur. >> yeah, everybody is getting emojis. i bet if o.j. gets paroles there will be a whole emo-jay, a whole pack. a glove, white bronco, a kato kaelin holding a tiny head shot of kato kaelin. >> trevor: i'm sorry to hear. this i never thought of this, so basically you don't use an emoji for yourself-- yourself. >> oh no, i use the a he mojy, the one closest to the redhead,

the clown, the gotd damn clown, trevor. emojis are fun. i just want to be included. i want to be in a leotard dancing with my best friend. i want to carry a plate of invisible food. i want to be a dinosaur! all i want is one emoji. is that too much to ask? i mean redheads, we may not be as easy to deal with as brunettes or as popular as blonds. but we are people with feelings and thumbs and frekels, we have too many frekels. >> trevor: prepare my ginger. >> that is not your word to use. >> trevor: sorry, i got comfortable. michelle wolf, everybody. we'll be right back. (applause)

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you have...bug eyes! [intern] i have some terrible news. they're destroying the whole town! >> trevor: welcome back to the daily show, my guest tonight is the democratic governor of virnlg yavment please welcome terry mccall-- mcauliffe.

(applause) welcome to the show, governor. >> honored to be with you. >> trevor: what a time to you have on, this is fun. timing is everything. >> we have got a few issues. >> trevor: yes, a few. let's get straight into it. president trump had his voter fraud commission, new commission that has come together to figure out where all these illegal votes are. >> which is a fraud, the commission. >> trevor: when were you offered by this commission to handle the information, it seemed like a scary overreach for many americans. you know t was federal government saying hey, all the states we would like voter names, emails, addresses, i think it was partial social security numbers. >> yep. >> trevor: a hell of a lot of information. >> that's right. >> trevor: why do you think so many people were hess tanlt to hand that over, information over and why did you as the governor say no, we won't hand that information. >> i'm proud. i was the firs governor. no way were they getting my personal information from my

people. wasn't going to hand it over this commission, first of all they are spending $500,000 of taxpayer money. it is no authority from congress. >> trevor: right. >> and the gentleman running it mr. cough ak is the poster child for voter suppression in this country. i will take our data and let them use this to continue to gerry mannedder districts? there has been an effort for the last several years to reduce individuals' abilities to walk into a voting booth and vote. we've got to stop it and i was going to say, we're not going to tolerated it. (applause). >> trevor: the president came out today and said in a statement there are governors who do not wish to hand this information over. clearly there is something to hide, there is always something to hide when someone doesn't want to hand something over. so what are you trying to hide? >> trevor, gi back to the point, not one instance of voter fraud.

the states don't have it. if you've got an allegation, he just cannot get over this idea that hillary got more votes than he did. he cannot get over it, his ego will not let him deal with it, so he made this whole illusion up, that three million people voted illegally. show me one piece of evidence. show it to me. if i-- if you have evidence in virginia, i will act on it immediately because we do have to protect the integrity. we have men and women, wearing the cloth of this country today to protect our freedoms and liberties. >> trevor: right. >> my job as governor to make sure we are the greatest democracy and make sure people can walk in the voting booth and vote. but they are denying people. they want to make it harder for people to vote. >> trevor: let's talk about that, because america has seen an increase in voter suppression. that has been one of the biggest things plaguing america's democracy right now. and your state, you, i believe, have now set the record as a governor, i guess, giving the most voting rights to felons. which is something that has been stripped away-- by many states.

>> yeah. >> trevor: but it was an interesting story. you were blocked initially, how did you get around that. >> i'm proud to sit here tonight as the governor who restored more felon rights than any governor in the history of the united states of america. (applause). >> trevor: if i may, if i may interject t may not seem obvious but somebody might go why would you be proud of that. these are felons, why would you allow them to vote. >> first off second chances matter. these people trevor have paid their debt to society, a judge and jury determined what their sentence may be. they are done. they are back in our community. they are going to churchings. they are paying taxes. i didn't give you gun rights back i disintd reduce your sentence, i merely said i want to you feel good about yourself, welcome you back in society. are you paying taxes, you ought to vote. >> trevor: the president of the united states and yourself are not the best of friends. you got to meet him recently, i believe it was for the first time. i think, i remember reading in the statement you were four inches from his eyeballs.

and you said to him, and i may be para phrasing, you said to him your policies have hurt my economy. >> that's right. >> trevor: what did you mean by that statement? >> yeah, as chairman of the governors we were having a dinner at the white house. hi met the president before. and i said mr. president, what you are doing, on the 2r568 ban, i was very proud as soon as they did that travel ban, i went to dulles airport with my attorney general and said i'm the governor of this state. this airport is in my state. you have a virginia family in that back room with two children with u.s. passports that have been detained for five hours without access to legal counsel. i want them released now. i am the governor of this state. (applause) these immigration policies, has hurt, in northern virginia a dynamic economic area of virginia. if you look at that area, small businesses are the key. 50% of the small business owners are foreign born. they are the economic engine. so i told the president, looked

right at him, you talk about jobs, mr. president, all you have done is hurt my economy with your travel ban. i lost two companies that were going to come to virginia looking, investing. go back to what you said were you going to do. i will work with anybody. >> trevor: would you run for president? >> i'm happy right now being governor of the commonwealth of virginia. think about this, trevor, patrick henry our first governor, give me liberty, give me death, started the american revolution, thomas jefferson, our second governor, and now terry mcauliffe. >> trevor: i'm going to take that as a yes. thank you so much for being on the show, governor terry mcauliffe, everybody. we'll be right back.

>> trevor: that's our show for tonigh t