it gets you wifi here, here, and here. it even lets you take a time out. no! no! yes! yes, indeed. amazing speed, coverage and control. all with an xfi gateway. find your awesome, and change the way you wifi. - oh, so what happens was word got out to lord gordon squared that these guys were gonna catch him. and he knew his number was up. so he decided to throw a big winnipeg. [laughs] - [chuckles] - he decided to throw a big party.

he had a--the all the high-society people, and they're all, like, crazy. like, yes, this is great. and then all of a sudden, lawmen show up, and they say, we're looking for lord gordon-gordon. and lord gordon-gordon looks at them, and he says, hold on, i've got to get me tam o' shanter. it's a scottish hat. [dramatic music pounds] all of a sudden, they hear a gunshot. [imitates gunshot] lord gordon-gordon shot himself in the temple and died from the gunshot. - oh, i thought that was the end of the story. - no. [blows raspberry] [blowing raspberries] [dramatic orchestral music] ♪

>> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: thank you so much, everybody! what's going on, people? what's going on? welcome. welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. our guest tonight the c.e.o. of microsoft. satya nadella is joining us. but last night, last night was th big alabama senate election. and we're going to get to that, but first, major news from the white house. someone just got fired, but not the person you were hoping for. >> all right, we do have breaking news about a staff

shake-up. >> omarosa manigault newman, better known as omarosa to people who like to watch "the apprentice"-- she will be leaving the white house effective january 20. >> john kelly was tired of it. he was tired of all the drama. kelly confronted her. she was very vulgar, very-- she was cursing. she tried to go see the president. security alerted general kelly. he came back down, told secret service to take her out of there. >> wow. >> she was escorted off the property. it was very ugly. it was high drama. >> trevor: oh, yeah! ( laughter ) the trump administration is having its season one finale, people. i'm loving this. ( laughter ) that is so wild. you can imagine being there when general kelly was fighting with omarosa. he was probably like, "goddamn! this is some bull! i'm sick of this crap! (bleep)" and then omarosa was like, "okay, fine, i'll leave." ( laughter ) but let's move on to the big story that's rocking america

right now. alabama has gone blue. ( cheers and applause ) >> republican roy moore falls short in alabama's hotly contest senate race. >> a seismic shift in the u.s. senate, first democrat to win in alabama in a quarter century. >> it was an earthquake, you could say. the traditionally republican state of alabama surprised the world by electing a democratic senator. >> trevor: roll blue tide! after 25 years of electing only republicans, alabama voted in a democrat, which is huge. alabama hasn't been this shaken up since the arrival of 23andme. so congratulations to alabama's newest senator, doug jones. congratulations, doug jones, who i assume is-- ( cheers and applause ) i guess he's one of those people in the picture. no, because, i mean, i'm not really sure what he looks like. ( laughter ) yeah, the truth is, in this race, no one really paid

attention to doug jones. the only question was who was alabama going to choose-- an accused pedophile or a person allowed to baby sit? that was the only choice. ( laughter ) and you know what, you may not know doug jones, but after seeing how gracious and inclusive he was in victory, you can see why people like him. >> the african american community, thank you! ( cheers and applause ) my friends in the latino community, thank you! ( cheers and applause ) to all my jewish friends, happy hanukkah! ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: oh, wow. doug jones is so nice, he even thanked the seven jewish people in alabama. i like that. i like that. well, this was so great to see a man, doug jones, surrounded by all that love. although, i will say, you have to be careful because there were so many black people there, and they were all cheering with him, and that's his coalition. it's easy for you to forget sometimes, you know, white people get hell--a-comfortable. they're like, "we did it! we did it (bleep)!

( laughter ) i-- i also molested girls? no, you're not getting out of this! you're not getting out of this! so with doug jones elected, the democrats will now have 49 seats in the senate, which leaves the republican majority as narrow as it could be. and that's going to make passing bills really tough for mitch mcconnell. you know, it's going to make it much harder, you know. the other republican senators can demand anything before they vote on a bill, like marco rubio could demand tax breaks for the puppet maker who made him a real boy. anything. ( laughter ) but the republicans have only themselves to blame, because that's what happens when your candidate is cowboy roman polanski, who, by the way-- who, by the way, still hasn't admitted defeat, even after he lost. >> i really want to thank you for coming tonight and realize when the vote is this close, it is not over, and we still got to go by the rules about this recount provision. but we also know that god is always in control.

( cheers ) >> trevor: my man, you're waiting to see what god is going to say? alabama, after 25 years, just went democrat. if there ever was an act of god, this is it. ( cheers and applause ) this is it. he's like, "god has a plan. we're going to hear"-- god is like, "i did this thing!" ( laughter ) if i was god, i would be so pissed at roy moore. "yo, dude, i gave you the biggest sign. i literally parted a red sea! ( applause ) what do you want me to do, huh? going to send you a burning bush." "oh, i'm not really into bush." "goddammit!" and no matter how much roy moore might pray on it, there won't be a recount, because according to alabama law, jones' margin of victory was far too big. and you could tell there was no

question, no question. how different the vibe was at doug jones' party versus roy moore's. and this is the real music playing at these events. ♪ teach me how to dougie teach me, teach me how to dougie teach me how to dougie ♪ ♪ now watch me whip ♪ now watch me ney-ney ♪ oh, god my father >> trevor: you can't blame people for like doug jones. roy moore is doing bible study, and doug jones is like, "now i'd like to do a reading from the book of shootts! shootts! shootts!" so with that, the story of alabama's senate race finally has come to an end, and the good guy won. wow. ( cheers and applause ) i won't lie-- i didn't think that could happen anymore.

yeah. the only thing i will miss about roy moore going forward is all the crazy (bleep) that he brought with him. like his campaign spokesman, ted crockett. >> judge moore has often said that he doesn't think a muslim member of congress should be allowed to be in congress. why? under what-- under what provision of the constitution-- >> because you have to swear on the bible. >> the law is not that you have to swear on a christian bible. that is not the law. ( laughter ) you don't know that? all right. ( laughter ) >> trevor: come on, man. don't say nothing. anything is better than silence. just say, "pass"-- anything. i've never seen someone do that blink outside of a cartoon. this was like plink, plink, plink. so congratulations, alabama. we are proud of you for not electing an accused pedophile. and so as a token of our appreciation, we got you a little something, actually, over

here. it's thanks for not voting for the accused pedophile. there we go. look at that. congratulations. ( cheers and applause ) for more on this, let's turn to our very own alabama native, roy wood jr., everybody! ( cheers and applause ) >> i do declare, i do declare. >> trevor: roy? >> all right, african, how are you? >> trevor: what the hell are you wearing, man? >> this is my heritage, man. you know how long i been waiting to wear this? because, like, when you're outside the south, you have to hide being from alabama. you have to hide your accent. you have to pretend to like avocados. not today! man, i put this bitch on. i've been walking up and down the streets acting extra southern. just, "hi, y'all. i got sweet tea and gravy if you thirsty." ( laughter ) dude, this (bleep) is crazy. i woke up to, like, 30 text messages, people texting me, congratulating me, just because

of where i'm from. and, trust me, no one ever congratulates you on being from alabama. they just call you "stupid" or they say, "you got crooked teeth" or "you're dumb." >> trevor: you live in trailer parks -- >> i got this. ( laughter ) >> trevor: sorry. ( laughter ) >> today just feels good. it's just a good feeling, man. i'm in a party mood. and i guarantee you, i'm not the only one. >> selma, alabama, tonight turned alabama into a blue state, even if it is just for a moment. you have to sit back-- we will worry about how he's going to legislate in a red state tomorrow. but tonight, there are a lot of people who are drinking hennessy in alabama. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: roy, what are you doing? >> sorry, i was just basking in it, man. look, for years people have asked me where i'm from, and i just say birmingham, hoping they

assume i'm from birmingham, england. ( laughter ) but today, today, trevor, i get to tell people i'm from birmingham, alabama! for years, i had to choose: am i a southerner or am a progressive? well, now, i can be both because it turns out, trevor, you can have your cake and eat it, too. >> trevor: roy wood jr., everyone. ( cheers and applause ) we'll be right back. ok, so with the award-winning geico mobile app, our customers have 24/7 access, digital id cards, they can even pay their bill- (beep) bill has joined the call. hey bill, we're just- phone: hi guys, bill here. do we have julia on the line too? 'k, well we'll just- phone: hey sorry. i had you muted. well yea let's just- phone: so what i was thinking-

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>> last night, the state of alabama elected a democratic senator for the first time since 1992. this happened for a few reasons -- ideological divisions in the republican party. moderates turned off by president trump. and, apparently, some people don't like accused kiddie touchers, also. but there was one really huge factor that you can't ignore. >> doug jones was able to pull off this stunning upset with the help of a special coalition of voters in alabama, african americans. >> the biggest factor was huge african american turnout. >> black voters were a bigger share of the vote yesterday than they were in the 2012 presidential race. >> they turned out more for doug jones than they did for barack obama. you just can't put a finer point on it. >> trevor: wow! doug jones is bigger than obama?

i mean, not every way. let's not kid ourselves. (bleep) but democrats in alabama really got out the black vote. they were probably-- it was easy for them because they've got it's post is half made, so they just put those things up. ( laughter ) but my favorite thing about the black turnout last night was watching white people on the news talk about it. >> and watching the ability of turnout in the 13 counties comprisedly the so-called black belt. >> what they call locally the black belt, so named because of the color of topsoil in alabama. >> this is what's called the black belt, and it's called that for the topsoil-- deep, black, rich, agricultural topsoil. it is a place where you have a significant african american population. >> trevor: you hear how quickly he wanted to get through that part.

it's called the black belt because of the topsoil. back to you, wolf. just out of curiosity, i wonder why it is so many of alabama's black people happen to live where the deep rich soil is. i guess we'll never know. for more on the election now, we return to our very own dulce sloan, everybody. so, dulce, big turnout last night by black people. >> not just black people. black women. ( cheers and applause ) did you know 50% more black women voted yesterday than black men? in fact, 98% of black women voted against roy moore. 98%. the only thing 98% of black women agree on is no roy moore-- do not get our hair wet. so this happened because of us,

black women. >> trevor: wow. ( cheers and applause ) you say-- you say-- you say "us" but did you vote in alabama? >> no, i didn't. ( laughter ) but do you have another black woman on this show can thank? ( laughter ) so on behalf of awe all black women, i'm taking a victory lap. you know, but these titties don't run. >> trevor: people are saying thank you to black women. online you saw it. it must be nice to see black women's contributions finally recognized. >> yes! yes, it is! we've been through so much! ( laughter ) and you're welcome, whoit people. you're welcome. but let's be honest-- we didn't do it for you. we did it for ourselves. no black woman cast her vote going, "this one's for scott!" (bleep) scott. so if you really want to thank us, how about you all change the laws to make it easier for us to

vote? or sing our praises by giving us raises. or, at the very least, cancel winter pup know only white people like snow. ( applause ). >> trevor: those are fair points, dulce. let's move on and analyze last night's election? >> analyze. black women don't have time to analyze. net neutrality,. ( cheers and applause ) i gave you this so that if you ever get scared, you can go... [ whistling ] people who need help with matters that can't be explained... [ gasp ] come to me. are you there? whistle if you can hear me. [ whistling ] is there an entity in this house that is trying to hurt me? [ whistling ] are you that entity? [ whistling ] are you behind this wall? there's nothing. [ gasps ] insidious: the last key.

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is the c.e.o. of microsoft and the author of the new book, "hit refresh: the quest to rediscover microsoft's soul and minimu imagine a bettee for everyone." please welcome satya nadella. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome to the

show. >> thank you so much. >> trevor: c.e.o. of microsoft-- that is quite a big job title, and one i'm sure that completely gets you confused when you walk into a room. as c.e.o. of microsoft, when you walk in, do people sometimes just ask you to help them with something on the computer? do people ever say that to you, "can you just look at this thing?" >> all the time. ( laughter ) >> trevor: you operate at a high level, and you work as the c.e.o. of microsoft, but this book is interesting. i mean, "the quest to rediscover microsoft's soul," an interesting conversation to have in and around corporations, and specifically around tech giants right now. do you believe companies should in some ways strive to have feelings? >> i believe so. you know, we, as individuals, have an identity, a sense of purpose, that gives us direction in life, and organizations and institutions are made up of us. and so i do believe you have to

tap into the people and the common sense of purpose and identity. and when i think about and talk about microsoft's soul, that's what i'm talking about. what's that collective sense of purpose that we have inside of microsoft that gives us direction to have impact? >> trevor: microsoft of the one of the companies thrust into the political debate over the travel ban. employees of microsoft weren't able to leave or come back into the country. what is your stance on immigration, on daca, on what's happening right now within the administration and in the country? >> you know, really, if you think where i come from-- i mean, i'm a product of two amazing american things-- american technology reaching me growing up where i was in india, and then letting me even dream the dream. and then it's the american immigration policy that let me come here and live the dream. and i'm always reminded of that. >> trevor: right. >> and i think we-- so, therefore, i believe we should stand for it, not just in the

interest of microsoft, but in the interest of america. because if you think about where our competitive interests come from-- ( applause ) -- having the best people come seek employment here, contribute to our economy, gives us competitive strength in the world. >> trevor: right. >> but, also, there's one more aspect of this immigration policy and the enlightened immigration policy-- it gives us soft power. we are the beacon of hope for the people who most need it all around world. and the fact that we stand for it gives us immense power. ( applause ) >> trevor: the people who are against the immigration or daca would argue, "but why doesn't microsoft just get americans to do these jobs? why bring people in from the outside? aren't these jobs that could be going to americans?" >> and absolutely. there is no doubt that we should be doing everything possible to create opportunity here. in fact, one of the things we

recently did was-- you know, if you look at rural united states, right next to some of the largest data centers that we have, there isn't broadband connectivity. so in this context what we've done is formed a coalition of companies that we are trying to make sure there is broadband connectivity. today, if you are a veteran living in one of the rural area torkz even get the v.a. services, you have to have broadband connectivity. education definitely needs broadband access. so i think what you said is absolutely right. we, as individual companies, but the government and the entire society has to do everything to create local opportunities so that there aren't these inequities in our own society. >> trevor: what i did enjoy in the book is how i got to understand your connection with technology through your family. tell me a little bit about how technology has impacted the way you interact with your sons. >> yeah, you know, my son was born with cerebral palsy. so he's locked in. and one of the big pursuits for

us has always been how do we help him communicate? one of the things that he has, zane has, is a very eclectic taste in music, and he makes it known when he doesn't like what's playing. and so he always wants us to come and change the music. and we said, "what, can we do?" so one of the things that was very fun was his speech therapist engaged a couple of high school students, who came and hacked up a rig for him, which is just a button that he presses on his wheelchair, that changes music. and it's amazing to see him enjoy that empowerment and for us as parents to see that. so that's kind of one of the reasons why i'm so passionate about what technology can do to bring more people access to really fully participate. >> trevor: thank you so much for being here. >> thank you. >> trevor: i appreciate it. "hit refresh" is available now. satya nadella, everybody. we'll be right back.