captioning sponsored by comedy central from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. (applause). >> trevor: thank you so much, everybody, thank you so much, welcome to the daily show, thank you for tuning in i'm trevor noah my guest tonight and abc news anchor here to talk about his new book meditation for fidgety skeptics, dan harris is joining us, everyone. (applause). >> trevor: but first, but first since the dawn of the internet the nigerian prince has scammed you and every grand mother in florida.

well, finally we found out who this nigger is. >> if you have been waiting for a nigerian prince to fork over part of his fortune to you, sorry to tell you, there's been a snag. michael newe doesn't look like your typical nigerian prince, that is because is he a 67 year old man from louisiana. police say that nue was part of an email an phone scam that promised people money in exchange for their bank account information. >> trevor: you know, i always thought that those spam emails were misspelled because they were from nigeria. and it seems like they were from louisiana. louisiana is basically the nigeria of the south. yeah, i can't believe that this guy is a nigerian prince, white people take everything from black people. music, fashion and now they stole our stealing, are you [bleep] me. this is next level cultural a appropriation. he is basically accused of being the rachel dolezal of crime. i bet somewhere out there she is like i don't get it, he looks

like a nigerian prince to me. and now it may be a new year, but 2017 dnt leave us with some lingering questions. should we believe kyle rene about the parents s any powerful man not accused of sexual, and the biggest question did the trump administration collude with russia, for one person looking for the answers it is his job, robert mueller, the man you can't even tell we photo shopped into this law & order poster. yeah, is he one of those people? he's not the black guy, or is he. maybe he's that good. now since it started there have been many theories on what triggered the fbi's investigation of donald trump, was it a plot to keep trump out of the white house, a dnc hit job. now we learned it is the same reason that you called your ex-girlfriend on new year's eve and told her that you still love her, alcohol. >> it was at this london wine

bar according to the times that a former tramp trump campaign advisor first told an australian diplomat that russia had political dirt on hillary clinton. george pap lop lus made the eatlez to the ambassador to great britan during a night of heavy drinking. the australian passioned that trip along to the u.s. thortds. >> trevor: donald trump's people are such amateurs. everyone knows the first rule of keeping a secret is you don't drink with australians. like their smallest beer can size is buckets. their animals have a pouch for carrying beer. so the whole reason the ngi -- fbi started investigating trump is because johnny sunglasses over here couldn't handle happy hour and this is a big revelation in the trump russia story, one that we were 34r57bing. we were planning today to dive into on the show.

but then this afternoon the news got shaken up. because remember steve bannon, trump's former chief strategist and human leather jacket? well, today it came out that he also thinks the trump campaign did collude with russia. >> the president's form ever chief strategist steve bannon commenting on donald trump's, jr. meeting at trump tower where he was promised dirt on hillary cln ton. bannon says even if you thought that this was not tree on so-- treasonous or unpatriotic or bad blank and i happen to think it is all of that, you should have called the fbi immediately. >> saying this about the meeting in addition, saying they are going to crack don, jr. like an egg on national tv. so very harsh words there. >> whoa. don, jr. is going to crack like an egg, honestly, i don't even know if that is a metaphor. i think there is at least a 50% chance you would find yolk where a brain should be. although i am sur priesed that bannon knows that you crack eggs. i always just assumed that you ate them whole, like raw like with the shell and everything leak a snake, like.

so bannon slammed don, jr. and then he went on to say that will is no way the president didn't meet with the russians, that don, don, jr. snuck into their gold house, this is huge, steve bannon, steve bannon, trump's dude not only accused trump's second dumbest son of collusion, but he is also accusing the president of being in on it and then lying to the american people about it. you know what that means, people, buckle up, because trump's about to blow. >> president trump issued a statement like no presidential statement ever before in american history, lambasting his former campaign and white house senior strategist steve bannon. steve was rarely in a one-on-one meeting with me and only pretends to have had influence to fool a few people with no access. and no clue whom he helped write phoney book. steve does not represent my base. he's only in it for himself. steve bannon has nothing to do with me or my presidency. when he was fired, he not only

lost his job, he lost his mind. >> trevor: oh! damn! i didn't even know presidents could release distracts. but i do-- distracts but i feel batted for president trump because today he found out that some nazis aren't very fine people. imagine being told by donald trump that you have lost your mind. it's like cinabon tell you you you look like a dirty ass-- hole, cinnabon that is why they need frosting, remember those leaks that he claimed were coming from spice and wiretaps, remember those leaks t turns out there is nothing like a bad breakup to bring out the truth. >> steve pretends to be at war with the pledia which he calls the opposition party yet spent time to leaking false information to the media to make himself far more important than he was. it is the only thing he does well.

>> trevor: wow, that is harsh. i will say this, the president, chill out, because i know are you mad, president trump but that is not true. steve bannon does a lot of things well, all right. he can grow stubble while shaving. he can project-- projectile vomit on command and he can show look like your grandfather and your grandmother at the same time. that's a skill, that's a skill. trump's superdiss on bannon was pure fire and it didn't stop there. >> steve had very little to do with our historic victory. steve doesn't represent my base. he's only in it for himself. now that he is on his own, steve is learning that winning isn't as easy as i make it look. >> trevor: it's like donald trump is so amazing. in the mid of-- middle of compleatly ripping his former chief strategist he takes a moment to remind us how dope he is. it is like someone bitch slapping you and dabbing in the same motion, like-- but you know as much as i enjoy watching this fietd, i realize i don't know

who i am rooting for. steve bannon beefing with done all trump, like it is like alien versus sexual predator. without do you go with? and look, we don't know how this thing is going to end. could just be the start of a gop civil war or is it the latest episode of our favorite gringo tellenovela. we don't know. what we do know is that this is the first time a member of trump's innercircle is saying that this trump-russia collusion story is as bad as it seems. so steve bannon, here's to you, my friend. may you feast on whole eggs tonight as you grow the beard that you just shaved. we'll be right back. (applause) i gave you this so that if you ever get scared, you can go... [ whistling ] people who need help with matters that can't be explained... [ gasp ] come to me. are you there? whistle if you can hear me.

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>> trevor: welcome back to the daily show. it is a new year, people, which means everyone is working on their resolutions. for me, it is all the normal ones, get out to the gym more, stop giving people ebola. read more books. and apparently president trump's new year's resolution was, i should spend more time on twitter. >> the president unloading in his first day back here at the white house, 16 tweets. mainly a mixture of taunts and threats. >> president trump raised the temperature in his dual with kim jung-un who had boasted of having a nuclear button on the desk in his office. will someone from his depleted and food-starved regime please inform him the president wrote, that i do have a nuclear button but it is a much bigger and more powerful one than his and my button works. >> trevor: you know, i know that donald trump is trying to be menacing here but all i hear is a really catchy pop star. it's like my button brings all

the boys to the yard, and they're like, it's bigger than yours. damn right, it's bigger than yours! (applause) if you had a supercomputer, if you had a supercomputer that could run a simulation of a billion ways, to find the stupiddist possible way to get into a nuclear war, this tweet is what would come up every single time. there are some things that twitter just isn't appropriate for. because just take a step back, take a step back and think about what pressing the button would actually mean. >> hundreds of thousands of people incinerated instantly. and they would be the lucky ones. millions more would die horribly in the next few weeks while any survivor was be left to suffer in the des late world that is choked by poison ash. that is not for twitter, people, this at the very least that deserves a tumblr post. so trump's north korea tweet got all the attention. but it was only one, one part of yesterday's foreign diplomacy roast. >> president trump calling out a lot of fore ennations by way of

twitter over the last 24 hours. most recently threatening to cult off financial aid to the palestinian authority tweeting this. >> we pay the palestinians hundreds of millions of dollars a year and get no appreciation or respect. they don't even want to negotiate a long overdue peace trety with israel. we have taken injury us lum, the toughest part of the negotiation off the table. >> trevor: again, the appropriate place to tackle one of the toughest geo political problems in history is not on the twitter. and this one doesn't even make sense. like you listen what trump tweeted. he says he thinks palestinians should be happier to negotiate now that he has taken jerusalem off the table. jerusalem was one of the main things that they wanted to negotiate for. like this reminded me of another story from the holy land. remember king solomon and the baby, yes, remember that. imagine if the two women came to sol monday with the baby and sol monday ate the baby. and then he was like, i don't understand why you bitches are

not more cooperate-- cooperative, didn't i take the baby off the table? huh? and after provoking north korea and then insulting pal stein, the president then trurned to america's greatest foe, the fake news media. >> this tweet is another, it also came just moments ago from the president, quote, i will be announcing the most dishonest and corrupt media awards of the year on monday at 5:00. subjects will cover dishonesty and bad reporting in various categories from the fake news media. stay tuned. >> trevor: okay, that's the right way to use twitter. honestly, i'm not sure why donald trump would hold a corrupt media award ceremony on monday. i mean maybe he's just doing it so he can walk in on the reporters while they are changing. like o jake tapper what a surprise. so that was done ald trump's day on twitter. the bad news is, you know, he's itching to nart a nuclear war, the good news despite his threats to korea, at least he thinks we're going to make it until monday. >> this award season, forget the

oscars, forget the golden globe,s, because everyone is talking about the 2018 most dishonest and corrupt nuses award. >> are you fake news. >> hosted by the most popular person in history, donald j. trump. and featuring cnn's blind jim a cost-- lying jim acosta. >> such lying, disgusting people. >> drunk don lemon. >> a total disgrace. >> from morning joe, or crazy mika. >> they are the lowest form of humanity. >> and a special future immemorium for "the new york times." >> the failing new york times which is like so bad. >> so tune in monday at 5:00 a.m. or p.m., he didn't say. also, location tbd, twitter maybe. >> by the way, i hate some of these people but i would never kill them. -- no, i wouldn't. >> trevor: we'll be right back. (applause) hi, i'm paul.

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skeptics, a 10% happier how-to book. please welcome dan harris. (applause) welcome to the show. >> you make them stand like that. >> trevor: oh no, no, you make them stand with your presence. >> i feel a lot of people with-- . >> trevor: no "the daily show" audience, welcome to the show. >> thank you. >> trevor: what a time to be a news anchor. >> yeah. >> trevor: like were you on abc news and working and reporting on the news. can i ask, is this the most stressful time to be in the news. >> it's really stressful. but it's also enlivening because what we do matters. >> trevor: right. >> but i wouldn't say it is the most stressful. i have been at abc news for 18 years. it was really stressful when we were covering war gloangs, that was-- we were actually getting shotd at and i knew people who didn't make it. >> trevor: right. >> and so i am always a little reluctant to say now is more stressful than any other time,

in particular, just-- people talk about we're more divided now than ever. >> right. >> trevor: i don't think we are more divided now than we were during the civil war. >> when you look at the environment you are in, you were on the news many years ago and you had a panic attack live on the air. it was a panic attack that people watched, millions of people were much wag and then i think like 7 million people want on to view it on youtube as well which i'm sorry for you. >> and i appreciate you bringing it up, thanks. >> trevor: yeah. i mean that's how i roll. >> yeah, me and the people from cinnabon, are unhappy with you tonight. >> trevor: but i think what you got from it was really powerful and interesting. because you, you embarked on a journey which lead you to meditation. what does meditation mean for you. you have written a whole book about this and it's really enlightening. what does meditation mean to you and how does it help you get through your toughest times. >> first of all, are you right, i did have a panic attack on good morning america in 2004.

and at that time, meditation wasn't even like number 15 or 16 on my list of things to do i thought it was only for people who live in a yurt and are really into crystals and enya. >> trevor: right. >> i just didn't-- i had no interest in it. it took awhile for me to ultimately find the science that suggests meditation can lower your blood pressure, boost your immune system and literally rewire key parts of your brain. i also learned that the type of meditation that i do, which you also do as you mentioned to me which is called mindfulness meditation is secular and simple. you don't have to wear special outfits or join a group or anything like that. it is really just exercise for the brain. >> trevor: right. >> for me, i found that while it didn't solve all of my problems, i'm very wary of silver bullets, it just made me less of a moron. >> trevor: it made you less of a moron. >> yeah. >> trevor: i like that. >> yeah. >> trevor: a lot of people think that meditation is sitting in a room and is like om. >> you can do that if you want. >> trevor: but you don't do that.

>> no. >> trevor: you just take a moment and you breathed. do you focus on one thing. >> generally thinking there are three steps to beginning meditation. one is you find a reasonably dwie et-- quiet place and sit there and you can sit, you can stand, you can lie, but often people sit, close your eyes. the second step is just to bring your full attention to the feeling of your breathe going in and out, the third step is as soon as you try to do that you will find that you know your mind goes nuts. you think about what is for lunch, why did i say that dumb thing to my boss. and then the whole game is just to notice when you become distracted and to start again and again and again. and a lot of people feel that the moment when they see, they have gotten carried off by their thoughts is a failture, that they have failed at meditation, that is actually a victory. it is a victory of real consequence. because when you see how crazy you are, you are less owned by the crazeiness. you wake up to a fumentd fact about the human existence which is we have this inner narrator that chases us out of bed in the morning, and is yammering at us all day long and when are you unaware of this nonstop conversation it yanks awe

around. >> trevor: i feel like are you talking about doonld trump's tbeets when it says it yanks you out of bed in the morning and chases me around all day. you have gone around the country talking to people about meditation are there many skeptics, many people who go i don't want to get involved with that hokey pokey thing. i don't want to be involved. you meet these people and then they meditate. how do you convert people, how do you say to them just meditate, and what are the craziest things you have encountered when you try and convert every day americans to meditation. >> when i first got into, when i wrote a book about meditation four years ago and when i put that book out, i was really trying to convince people that meditation isn't weird. i think the culture has moved and actually meditation has become this as operational thing. >> trevor: yeah. >> and now the biggest problem, one of the biggest problems is what we just talked about. the myth that you need to cheer your mind. but i think an even bigger problem is time, people think i dob have time for this. and on this score i have good news and then even better news. the good news is i think five to ten minutes a day is a great

meditation habit. the better news is i think one minute counts. and i think telling that to people really lowers the bar in a way that allows them to embrace. >> trevor: you can meditate in one minute. >> yes, 60 seconds. >> trevor: what are you doing in the 60 seconds. >> just the same thing you do when you do it for five minutes. sit there, try to pay attention to your breathe, when you get distracted, start again. >> trevor: were you meditating when we were talking? >> i know are you trying to razz my-- i'm going to give you a serious answer, the serious answer is meditation broadly defines, just means paying attention to whatever are you doing. >> trevor: right. >> so since this is a big opportunity for me and i'm a little nervous to be on "the daily show," i'm actually paying very close attention to what you are saying because my life depends on it, yes. >> trevor: let me ask you this, and i will leave new the world of being a news anchor who is fair and diplomatic. do you think that president trump meditates or not? >> i strongly suspect he does not. but if he wants to, call me.

>> trevor: he won't call you but he will tweet you. >> well, i will take that. >> trevor: thank you so much for being on the show. >> thank you so much. >> trevor: meditation, it could be-- fidgety sceptics, dan harris. we'll be right back. do not play fetch. sfx: dog bark thanks grandma. why don't you fetch me some doritos. sfx: dog barking fetch me a bag full of doritos. sfx: dog bark fetch me a bare na... sfx: dog bark sfx: bear growl sfx: man screaming sfx: bear growl sfx: man screaming sfx: dog barking steyer: the president's national security adviser -- guilty. his campaign chairman -- under indictment. his son-in-law -- secret talks with russians. the director of the fbi -- fired.

special counsel robert mueller's criminal investigation has already shown why the president should be impeached. you can send a message to your representatives at needtoimpeach.com and demand they finally take a stand. this president is not above the law. with advil's fast relief, you'll ask, "what pulled muscle?" "what headache?" nothing works faster to make pain a distant memory. advil liqui-gels and advil liqui-gels minis. what pain?

>> trevor: that's our show for tonight. let's check with jordan klepper at the opposition. what is going on. >> it's award season, i'm excited. >> trevor: i thought you hated hollywood, man. >> oh, yeah, i do. the gold englobes are an illuminati plot to turn the globe gold. wake up, trevor. talking about the real award shows. trump's most dishonest and corrupt media awards. >> trevor: i su that, trump tweeted last night he is going to announce a bunch of fake news media awards. >> and there are so many number knees, cnn, abc, nbc, the "new york times," trevor, there say chance could you walk away with akoff eted fakey. >> trevor: wait, is that the statue he gives out. >> who cares.

the real award is the president of the united states is going after you on twitter every morning for the rest of his life. >> trevor: what an honor. jordan klepper, everyone, the opposition is up next. stay tuned. now here it is, your moment of glern. >> here is what i think happens next. steve bannon is going, it has been written about in this book and bannon then is going to say michael wolf made it up. then it will go to wolf and wolf will have to show a tape recording or proof of it that is where this is going to go but boy it sure is juicy. captioning sponsored by comedy central ( cheers and applause ) >> jordan: it's already january 3rd, and this is "the opposition." my opponent tonight is my opponent tonight is author jeff goo