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tv   The Daily Show  Comedy Central  February 27, 2018 11:00pm-11:31pm PST

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>> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome, everybody! thank you so much! ( cheers and applause ) welcome to "the daily show"! thank you for tuning in. i'm trevor noah. take a seat, everybody! our guest tonight cnn senior international correspondent nima elbagir is here with us.
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over the past week, the discussion in america has been should we give teachers guns or should we not give teachers guns? and teachers have been, like, uh, first, can you give us pay? >> right now, 20,000 teachers are on strike forcing every public school to close across west virginia. >> teachers are on the picket lines for a fourth straight day protesting their pay. >> thousands of teachers have come together on the steps of the capitol building to speak with one voice that low wages and rising healthcare costs are making their lives unbearable. >> the issue for me is i qualify for food stamps. >> as a full-time teacher you qualify for food stamps? >> yes, an that's while working two jobs. >> trevor: if there's one thing we can agree on, teachers should never be on food stamps, because if they're hungry, they can't shoot straight. come on, y'all. if i was a broke teach around the government handed me a gun,
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i would-be, thank you for that. kids! wallets and watches in the bag schd and give me the cheetos! i'm on food stamps. it broke west virginia decided to settle the strike and give its teachers a raise finally, which is great. ( cheers and applause ) yeah, and, honestly, i'm glad they got their money because i can imagine how frustrating it might be for a teacher in west virginia, they're struggling to make ends meet but you only get to be the forgotten man if you're working in a coal mine. you realize west virginia has way more teach, than coal miners. next time, maybe the teachers should just hold classes underground. it's almost impossible to cheat on a test d or breathe, but no cheating. today this happened. >> trevor: today jared kushner has had his security clearance significantly downgraded, sources tell cnn.
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the downgrade will prevent kushner from viewing the nation's most sensitive secrets, coming after new rules were implemented by chief of staff john kelly. >> trevor: that sucks. now kushner will have to wait for trump to tweet the secrets out. oh, man, it has to be so humiliating for kushner. top-level clearance for a year and then you lies it. that never happens. it would be like if your girlfriend made you start using condoms in the middle of your relationship. not a good sign. what's happening? don't worry, just do it. ( laughter ) how is this going to work? he's still going to be at the white house, but he's not allowed to hear certain information. general kelly, in meetings, will be what do we do about the n-u-k-e-s? jared kushner will be, i know what that means.
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there were will be, i don't! what does that mean! i'm naked. whose naked? i'm president. you have to tell me. flap laugh a turbulent time in the white house. this morning, it was reported president trump would make a shock announcement at some point today, and i'm not going to lie, everyone here at the show started freaking out, all right, because a shock announcement from trump could mean anything. all right, is he firing robert mueller, invading north korea or secretly in love with hillary and they're going for it, you know? like, yeah, our celebrity couple name is donald trump. well, turns out the shocking answer was, d, none of the above. >> all right, breaking news here, we learned who will serve as campaign manager for president trump's reelection bid. >> brad parskal, a former digital director for trump's 2016 campaign will be named as campaign manager. >> he has a big long beard, 6'-8, brad will be leading the 2020 campaign. >> trevor: his 2020 campaign,
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president trump hired sasquatch. ( laughter ) look at this guy. i'm pretty sure i've seen him in every movie. i've seen him get killed in every jason bourne movie ever. congratulations, brad. you are new campaign manager. just don't ask what happened to the last one or the one before that or that. but otherwise, good times! ( laughter ) since the presidential election isn't going to happen until 2020, let's talk about the elections coming up now, because it's 2018, people, which means mid transportation. yeah, these elections are shaping up to be dramatic. because with trump's low approval numbers, the democrats have the momentum going into november, the same way hillary had the momentum going into november. ( laughter ) having to deal with the blue tidal wave, several republicans decided to retire.
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there are more vacancies than a birthday for harvey weinstein. the vacancies are shaking things up like in utah where an open seat made room for an old character to get a new story line. >> tonight mitt romney made it official, the former massachusetts governor and presidential nominee is running for senate from utah, widely considered a heavy favorite to win the seat now held by longtime senator republican orrin hatch, who is retiring at the end of this term. >> trevor: orrin hatch is retiring? oh, no! ( laughter ) ( applause ) but taking his place, most likely is going to be mitt romney. in fact, let's be honest, he's definitely going to win, right? the dude has resting senator face, look at him, his portrait comes with the senate office before you hang up your own, that's how it works. for romney, running a state that's 80% white is smart. last time he tried to appeal to black people, it got a lilt
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wack, owe! >> who's got the camera, though? who let the dogs out, who, who? who? >> trevor: who? who? you know, romney might not have been good at campaign bug he would have been a five star uber driver. oh, hello, black person, i know what kind of music you like! yeah! do you guys like bernie sanders? ( cheers and applause ) well you will love what came out of his balls. >> bernie sanders' son is entering the family bid. levy sanders announced he's running for congress in new hampshire to replace retiring democrat congress woman carol shea porter. >> increasingly people understand that we need to have a living wage, that we need to have medicare for all, that we need to have tunisia-free colleges and universities. so i did talk to my dad about it, you know, i'm very proud of what he has accomplished, but i'm running, you know, on my own views.
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>> trevor: bernie sanders, you are the father. that was the shortest maury episode ever, like a clone of him. i can't believe that bernie even has a son. i just assumed that he skipped father an went straight to grandpa, you know? so republicans have old new people running, democrats have some new old people running, but as with any election, there's always going to be someone who's doing it just for the fame. >> conservative commentator stacy dash says she's running for congress, former actress and co-star of movie clueless wants to represent a district including compton and l.a.'s watts neighborhood. >> trevor: running as a republican in compton and watts? compton and watts sounds like a b.b. show. i'm guessing they aren't fans of her new role as fox news comment
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tater. >> either you want to be segregated or integrated. if you want to be integrated you, uh don't need to have things like bet. there is no feet for a bet or a bet awards or an image awards or an naacp for that matter, we don't need it anymore. there shouldn't be a black history month. we're americans, period. >> trevor: good lord, forget congress, stacy dash should run as president for the sunken place. ( laughter ) stacy doesn't expect to win. we know this is a publicity stunt to raise her profile for her next job which i'm guessing is either going to be "big brother" or the scar of the movie that only gets released in bulgaria. ( laughter ) i don't blame her because running just to become more famous actually works. the only time it didn't work is when donald trump did it but then he won by stent. he's that bad or good. i can't tell which one. point is, we better pray
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>> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show"! so there's been an ongoing debate in america about what to do with symbols of its unfortunate past, like statutes of confed rat leaders or ronald reagan's (bleep) ring but when it comes to symbols of the past, turns out america is not that unique. in a small town in western germany a church bell is forcing representatives to grapewell their demons. >> since 1934 a bell emblazoned with a swastika and the words "everything for the fatherland" has been chiming from the church of st. jacobs belfri. the town has come under pressure to remove it or put it in a museum. >> trevor: damn, a town in germany discovered they have a hitler bell which also happens to be the name of tinkerbell's
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less popular cousin. clap your hands if you know where the jews are hiding! yeah, disney never released that one out here. the town has a hitler bell, bad news. the good news is the local birds are shitting all overit. but the non-bird sentiment in town is a lot more divided. >> this bell is dedicated to a mass murderer who caused immeasurable human suffering all across europe and this bell calls the faithful to worship? >> it makes such a lovely sound. eth not the bell's fault. >> trevor: it's not the bell's fault! hitler was coming to power and this bell just watched? it's a bell. it literally could have raised an alarm! you think that hitler bell didn't know what was going on? huh? oh, it's an innocent little bell. then how do you explain this? ( bell tolling ) >> trevor: i'm guessing that
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was some other bell, huh? also, i love how that guy said it makes such a lovely sound! you know what else makes a lovely sound? a bell without a swastika on it. if you changed it, no one would be, like, wait a minute, i don't hear a swastika! ( laughter ) if it was up to me, solution is easy. keep the bell but like a bad tattoo, scroll in extra letters to turn hitler into shitler. and if that doesn't work, put the bell in a museum but the town's mayor sees a problem with that. >> in a museum it would really attract people to come to take selfies in front of the swastika. that can't happen here. >> trevor: let me get it straight, he wants to keep the bell where it is because he says if it was in a museum, neonazis would be taking selfies with it? nazis are bad, but millennialial inazis are the worst!
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ism allergic to gluten and minorities! yeah, yeah! this or this? this or this? but if you think this issue is upsetting ordinary germans, you should have seen the reaction of the furor himself. ( speaking german )
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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight won an george polk award for her shork report on migrant slave auctions in libya. in a new report out today she goes undercover in nigeria exposing the dangers and risks many nigerians face. >> what happened? the women are abused on the trip? >> in libya. >> what happens if they get pregnant? >> taking me aside, he repeats, condoms, don't struggle if you are raped and ultimately trust in god.
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with that we brought the overnight bus to the north, the doors locked behind us, from here begins the journey into the unknown, a journey that promises a litany of horrors -- rape, trafficking, slavery. >> trevor: please welcome cnn senior international correspondent nima elbagir. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to the show. >> thank you so much. >> trevor: your story that broke on cnn about the slave trade in africa was one that was truly one of the most shocking stories most people had ever heard. slavery in 2018, is it as widespread as it seems to be? is it something that people should be as worried as they are? >> in libya? yes. and i think that this is something we're still trying to piece together, we're still working to understand this. and what is extraordinary is that the slavery is part and parcel of their business model.
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>> trevor: right. >> you want to go to europe. you have been sold on this dream of europe, and they send out almost like advertising campaigns, people into these communities, these young kids, 17, 18, 19, we can get you to europe. you don't have the money? we will give you the money, we will loan you the money. so it's indentured servitude built into it. but that's the nigerian aspect, the different source countries. when you get to libya, they say, actually, how much did you pay? no, it is thousands more and this is how you're going to pay it off. >> trevor: when you look at the people who are traveling across to these countries, oftentimes, people don't seem to express as much sympathy for them because they go, like, they're trying to sneak into another country or get there, smuggle themselves in. you take issue with the term smuggling. why? >> i do. especially when you hear the term economic migrant. there's a real sense they're trying to lay that down,
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economic migrant, like people are kind of wandering on to a plane dragging their carry-ons behind them, we're economically migrating. they are being trafficked. when you are told part of your journey sexual abuse and rape and exploitation is part of that journey, that's trafficking. >> trevor: right. >> therefore when people call it economic migration, they're choosing to step back and not act. >> trevor: when you were creating that story, when you were reporting on that, you went undercover as a would-be my grant trying to work her way through to see how it all goes down. that must have been a terrifying experience. did it give you a larger understanding of what women are going through in africa as they try to make their way through these european countries? >> yes, because i think in the moment, i know intellectually -- of course, i'm not alone. i have my amazing producer with me, and we had a backup plan.
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we had a cordon, in a sense. >> trevor: right. >> but in that moment when that man was so close, and i had spent about 45 minutes in a car with him -- just -- i mean, it's ridiculous, but it's even horrible to think about it, you know, him kind of squeezed against me, the intimidation, and he looked down and saw my wedding ring and he said, are you married? i said, yes. he said, that doesn't exist anymore, not on this journey. and it was a tiny glimpse into what these kids, these 17, 18, 19-year-old girls, how must it feel for them? >> trevor: i always wondered how the people of libya feel about it because, at the time, the story was liberation. muammar gadhafi has been killed. the country is free, and then you look at libya now and it's descended into a world where there is literally a slave trade. do people now look back and wish on a time when muammar gadhafi was in power? >> yes, they do. there is this extraordinaire no,
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sir stallia for gadhafi and his rule, i know it's incredibly naive to believe any country would want to put boots on the ground but the hope is stablization. that didn't happen. people are saying when was the last time we were stable? under gadhafi. >> trevor: that's a terrible place to be in. after your report came out, people were hashtagging. many melt helpless because you are. is there anything a person on this side of the world can do to help in any way with this equation situation. >> we're so grateful you've had me on tonight because as long as we keep reminding people this is still happening because eng at the time everybody heard all this noise and we thought someone somewhere is doing something. but no one was.
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the security council met four times and still haven't found an effective way through this. if we keep reminding them we care, i think ultimately they will be forced to do something. >> trevor: thank you so much for being on the show. >> thank you so much. >> trevor: to learn more about filma's reporting and get in the fight against modern-day slavery go to cnn web. nima elbagir, everybody. we'll be right back. we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause )
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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: well, that's our show for tonight. before we go, let's check in with jordan klepper at "the opposition." jordan, what have you got going on tonight, man? >> celebrating trump's reelection, baby! brad parscale, the new 2020 campaign manager. >> trevor: we were just talking about him. didn't congress make him testify about the russia facebook stuff? >> probably a little small talk. >> trevor: and he retweeted a bunch of russian bots? >> he's a patriotic american. >> trevor: and hired the firm that persuaded wiki leeks to release hillary's stolen e-mails. >> all i heard was hillary's e-mails. can we talk about that for once? >> trevor: i guess. but first -- now here it is...
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your moment of zen. >> my life would be easier if i was a liberal because no one questions your competence. >> is that right? >> i should be a liberal. >> you should be. >> my life would be easier. >> well, you would have a hard time here at fox. ( laughter ) al ♪ ♪ al ( cheers and applause ) >> jordan: it's world war you, and the brain is the battlefield. it's already february 27. my opponent tonight is national correspondent for "the washington post," wesley lowery. ( cheers and applause ) you know-- you know i got a lot to cover tonight: "infowars," immigration, and china. it's not just the plates that my mom won't let me eat off. it's also a country-- a country up to no good.

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