>> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: thank you so much, everybody! welcome to "the daily show." thank you so much for tuning in. i'm trevor noah. our guest tonight, the former head of the c.i.a. and the n.s.a., here with a new book, michael hayden is joining us, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) but first, let's get into the news. french president emmanuel macron is doing his world tour. and during a press conference down in australia, things got a little awkward.

>> french president emmanuel macron raised a few eyebrows during a press conference in australia by calling prime minister malcolm turnbull's wife, "delicious." >> i wanted to thank you for-- i wanted to thank you and your delicious wife for your warm welcome. >> trevor: whoa! back off, pepe le pew! ( laughter ) that's someone's wife. you know, it would have been cool if the australian prime minister thought it was some sort of custom and rolled with it. if he was like, "thank you, president macron. yeah, your wife is quite shaggable as well. ( laughter ) i totally snack on 'er, yeah." now, apparently, this was caused by a little translation issue, because, apparently, the french word for "delicious" also means "delightful," which is good. yeah. for a minute, though, i was worried. i was worried that when macron came to the u.s. instead of him rubbing off on trump, it was trump that was rubbing off on him. like, they held hands and suddenly macron was like, "madame and monsieur, we will make france great again. who is going to pay for it?

belgium! belgium! delicious." ( laughter ) speaking of delicious, let's check in with harold bornstein, trumps former doctor and aging bongo salesman. ( laughter ) now, you may not remember this, but the reason we all came to know dr. bornstein was because back in late 2015, he wrote trump an official's doctor's letteruc saying that trump was so healthy that we'd be dumb not to have him as president. well, today, we learned something that we suspected all along. >> this morning, the doctor, who during the campaign proclaimed president trump will be the healthiest individual ever elected to the presidency, says that diagnosis came straight from trump himself. dr. harold bornstein, president trump's longtime doctor in new york, signed and released this letter with that statement in december of 2015. but now, cnn reports dr. bornstein told them those were trump's words. "he dictate the that whole letter. i didn't write that letter." >> he wrote it himself.

>> trevor: yeah, of course trump wrote it himself. really, "the healthiest individual ever electedly to the presidency?" this is the least surprise reveal ever. it's like if at the end of the "sixth sense" they were like, and bruce willis was alive the whole time!" yeah, that's what we thought. i'm just amazed by how everything in trump's world turns out to be a lie. like, even his do,'s note say lie, his doctor's note. in fact, i wouldn't be shocked if dr. bornstein is just trump in disguise. ( laughter ) take off the glasses, you know. you shave the beard, take all the hair on the sides, fut on took place. ( laughter ) ( applause ) i'm just saying. i'm just saying. ( cheers and applause ) so right now, president trump is not on good terms with his doctor, but on the other hand, things have gone south with another one of his lawyers. >> fox news has now confirmed that ty cobb is out as the president's in-house russia counsel.

>> the president tweeted, "the failing 'new york times' purposely wrote a false story stating that i'm unhappy with my legal team on the russia case wrong. i am very"-- all caps-- "very happy with my lawyers, john dowd, ty cobb, jay sekulow. they are doing a great job." >> trevor: year, they are doing such a great job, they're now gone. so it's now official-- ty cobb is out. and you know shit must be brewing if a guy who looks like ty cobb is bailing. ( laughter ) like, do you know-- do you know what it takes to scare a guy who had cholera during the spanish-american war? ( laughter ) do you know what it takes to scare that person? i'm just saying, things are looking serious. and now-- this is interesting-- replace the monopoly man's nephew, trump-- trump has hired a new lawyer, emmet flood, a man who is best known for defending president clinton during his impeachment. yeah. i always feel like you can tell

somebody did the thing when they want the lawyer for the guy who did the thing. ( laughter ) it's like, "i didn't kill nobody. but who was that o.j. lawyer again?" ( laughter ) but let's move on to education. you see over the past two months, teachers across the country have been protesting for better pay and better working conditions. >> arizona is facing a fifth day of teacher walkouts and school closures today. the strike has impacted nearly two-thirds of the state's public schools, and nearly 800,000 students. >> high schoolteacher courtney thompson says she works four jobs just to make ends meet and struggles in school. >> we have cockroaches in our school. we have rats in our school. it is crowded. >> trevor: hell, yeah, it's crowded. you're also teaching rats and cockroaches. ( laughter ) and don't you dare call them pets, because with the help of a passionate drama teacher, those rats and roaches will put on an

absolutely stunning production of "spring awakening" this but america really needs good teachers, bought bauz without good teachers you get college dropouts who say things like this. >> now, kanye west is defending himself against really the indefensible. he said slavery was a choice. here's the sound. >> you hear about slavery for 400 years. for 400 years, that's not like a choice. >> trevor: just-- just me? no, kanye, slavery is not a choice. going blond is a choice. ( laughter ) both are terrible, but one is easier to undo. although, actually, you know, when i think about it, slavery was a choice-- for white people. yeah. white people were like, "hey, should we keep doing stuff ourselves or make other people do it for us? hmmm. yeah, other people.

yeah, that sounds good. that sounds good. good choice." so kanye west popped up at t.m.z.'s offices and decided to freestyle some history lessons. thankfully, t.m.z. staffer van lathan was there to call kanye out in person. >> producer van lathan taking west to task about the slavery comment. >> while you are making music and being an artist, the rest of us in society have to deal with these threats to our lives. frankly, i'm disappointed. i'm appalled. and, brother, i am unbelievably hurt by the fact that you have morphed into something to me that's not real. >> trevor: wow. that was powerful. that was really, really powerful. and you know there was one scared white person in that office who was like, "hello, police." ( laughter ) ( applause ) "two black people arguing in the office right now." you know, normally, i wouldn't really care what kanye west said about slavery or black history,

but what does suck is that now every member of the tiki torch club out there is going to use kanye's words to justify their hate. basically, the way kanye samples old-school soul music is how racists are going to sample him now. they'll be like ♪ black folks have choices like slavery ♪ so, look, kanye may think he's just being a free thinker, but the truth is, there's nothing good coming out of this, except maybe, maybe, an idea for a new movie. ♪ ♪ >> that servant who don't obey his lord shall be beaten. >> oh! shit! >> love my job! ♪ in my life ♪ in my life >> hey, you all ready? i got donuts? ♪ i see the light

>> being a slave is the best choice i ever made. i get to work and have fun in the sun. >> master brought you here to work. any more will earn you 100 lashes. i may need to talk to h.r. about that. do what you love and never work a day in your life. >> get back to work, boy! ( applause ) >> trevor: roy wood jr., everybody. we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause ) today, historical sites are disappearing, but ai can help us bring history back to life. to recreate historical sites, we had to stitch hundreds of pictures one by one. with microsoft ai, we are able to stitch hundreds of thousands of pictures in one night. i need to make it possible, because it's so important to do it. with artificial intelligence you can go in, you can experience it.

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daily show." i know we've all been disappointed by kanye west. but it turns out, he's not the only one who doesn't seem to understand slavery in america. a recent online survey found that only 8% of american high school seniors could identify slavery as the central cause of the civil war. yeah. and even worse, 10% say the winner of the civil war was captain america. ( laughter ) that's scary. and this seems like an insane statistic, but when you see how some schools try and teach slavery, you'll understand why. >> a homework assignment given out this week at a charter school in san antonio has set

off an uproar. the students were instructed to make a list of the negative and positive aspects of slavery. >> this is the paper robert livar's eighth grade son was given to fill out in history class. you can see his son wrote "not applicable" on the side labeled "positive aspects" and wrote a long list of negative aspects. roberts says there's no excuse for this assignment. >> trevor: okay, first of all, that kid gets an "a" for life. that was amazing. ( applause ) because that assignment is horrible. like, that assignment is so bad, it almost seems like a trap to find the racist kids in class. like, "okay, kids, what were the positive aspects of slavery?" "i know, cheap labor." "trick question. go to detention you little grand wizard! and it gets worse. it gets worse. these insane lessons on slavery have spread into some other subjects somehow. >> gannett county parents are outraged tonight over a third-grade math homework. it referenced slaves picking fruit and violence.

>> one problem said, "each tree has 56 oranges. if eight slaves picked them equally, then how much would each slave pick?" then there was another, "if frederick got two beatings per day, how many beatings did he get in one week?" >> trevor: okay, okay, first of all, two beatings times seven-- that's 14 beatings. but, secondly, slavery is too serious to casually drop into math problems. and, by the way, i'm not just worried about how inappropriate those questions are. i'm worried about how it's escalated. like, first it's just picking oranges. next, it's beatings. you know, if the next question starts out with, "eight men in white robes show up to frederick's house, run!" ( laughter ) so, look, obviously, these assignments aren't treating slavery with the weight it deserves. but it turns out some teachers go too far in the opposite direction. >> a bronx teacher landing in hot water for what he allegedly did to children during an assignment on the slave trade. >> she singled out black students, told them to lie on the floor, and stepped on their

backs to show them "how it is to be a slave." >> a controversial lesson about slavery has been pulled from a cerritos high school. >> a mother complained recently after getting this email. staff would act as slave ship captains, the email described, and the children slaves. they used masking tape to tie their wrists together, make them lay on the ground, and in a dark room, have them watch a clip from the film "roots." >> trevor: what the (bleep), people? ( laughter ) imagine how confusing that is for a child. because on the one hand, getting tied up is terrifying. on the other hand, getting to watch a movie in school is sweet as hell. ( laughter ) like, if you asked eight-year-old trevor to get an ass-whipping to watch "jurassic park" in science class, i'm taking that beating. you have to admit, that lesson was historically accurate, i guess. you know, slave captains did tie up africans, load them on boats, and then had a movie night. the africans were like, "move your chains. i can't see the screen. this is my favorite part. nobody puts baby in the coroner."

( laughter ) and, look, i know some people say, "trevor, no, these teachers are just trying to be creative in how they teach. i get that. i get that. but here's my question: how come teachers only seem to get creative like this with slavery? it doesn't happen with any other historical subject. they're never like, "hey, connor, because you're irish, i'm going to take away your lunch so you can learn about the potato famine." they never say that. ( laughter ) and also this thing of justifying bad things in history. you never hear teachers asking kids to write an essay on why iceberg was good for the "titanic," or asking three reasons why those people deserved to be eaten by jeffrey dahmer. like, all i'm saying is if you're going to teach slavery that way, teach it all the way. or, at the very least, if you're going to teach slavery this way, end the lesson on a high note. will if you tie the kids up and make them watch "roots," then at the end, they get to watch "django unchained" and whip the teacher's ass.

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that deer, it just... just came out of nowhere. >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a retired four-star general, former director of the c.i.a. and n.s.a., and author, whose latest book is called "the assault on intelligence: american national security in an age of lies." please welcome michael hayden. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to the show. >> thank you. >> trevor: it's good to have you here. the last time i saw you, we were debating the possibilities of trump having a presidency and

what that presidency could look like if it carried on-- >> i recall the conversation. >> trevor: it has now come to pass. ( laughter ) and your book, your book is speaking directly to the situation we're in now-- the assault on intelligence. you make your point throughout the book about how trump's lies have wreaked havoc on the intelligence community. what does that mean? >> so-- so, let me kind of structure it is how i approach it in the book, kind of a three-layer problem. and it's really important to understand the layers, all right. layer one is us, all right. it's our political culture, which has moved into what the oxford dictionary calls a post-truth world, in which we make decisions based upon emotion, preference, allegiance, tribe, grievance-- not on facts, not on data. donald trump-- we were here two years ago talking about this-- donald trump recognized that. he saw it. he exploited it during the campaign. and i think he has worsened it with some of his behavior and language while he is president. he's riding that post-truth

wave. and then to make this really complicated, we have a foreign adversary kind of coming through the perimeter wire on us, recognizing what's going on here, and exploiting it. and it's all based, trevor, on the concept of truth or post-truth. >> trevor: how is it that it benefits trump and nobody else? i mean, shouldn't something, like living in the post-truth world, also damage donald trump as the person in power? >> well, it will over time ivanka got to base decision on reality, based on fact. over time i think we'll recognize we're speeding down a cull desack here. but it's going to take time. >> trevor: why do you say it wreaks havoc on the intelligence community specifically. i understand the american people being affected. but why does the intelligence community get affected?

>> not really, and let me try to describe it this way: the high-friction points of the administration, with the broader society, have been with intelligence, law enforcement, the courts, journalism, science, scholarship. what do they all have in common? they're all fact based. they're all evidence-based enterprises. >> trevor: right. >> and that's where we see the friction with the style of governance that is post-fact, not based on hard reality. >> trevor: right. >> so it's really interesting. i kind of counted them off on my fingers. last time we were here, all right, the intele digit was over here. >> trevor: right, right, right. >> because these folks over here had serious questions about how we acquired data. >> trevor: right. >> you and i have had that conversation. that's not the argument today. these folks over here welcome the intele guys into this circle now, because we'll get back to arguing about how we acquired it later. >> trevor: right. >> but right now, they recognize us, like them, as data people. and it's the fact-based enterprises that feel under siege. >> trevor: do you understand, though, why some people would argue that donald trump is well within his rights to attack the

intelligence communities because in some ways, the intelligence communities have been responsible for misinformation themselves? i mean, one of the classic examples was the flawed intelligence report that led america to the war in iraq. >> right. >> trevor: so if somebody says, "yeah, but donald trump is saying these fake things," some might argue, yeah, but the c.i.a., and n.s.a., and all these other organizations did that as well, and that's why we're in iraq now. >> great question. you and i kind of worked our way through that issue. i menged the last time i was here. i was in the room. i believed it to be true. we were wrong. but the difference is we were trying to pursue an accurate picture of objective reality. objective reality. we got it wrong. life's hard, and sometimes even with your best effort, fact-based institutions fail to get the true picture. that's not what we're arguing about today. what we're arguing about is decision making that is indifferent to objective reality, that is based on these other things-- preference, grievance, tribal loyalty.

>> trevor: let's talk about one additional thing that you lay out in the book, as you say, the structururing the books into thirds. the third of russia. >> yeah. >> trevor: russia and bots and facebook has become a story that has been all over the news. many have labeled this as one of the biggest threats to america's democracy because they're pushing forward the post-truth world. some might say russia is only doing to america what america has been doing to them. how do you respond to this as somebody who knows better than anybody what america did to influence or not russia's elections? >> other than as an element of american policy to support what you and i would call democracy, there are no comparisons between what we do and what the russians have done to our election. remember my three-layer cake here? the biggest problem is us. that enables the russians to mess with our heads. i mean, they've actually made a run at the norwegians, too. it didn't work, because norway isn't a fractured society. and so what the russians are

doing is using high technology and an approach to information dominance-- which i have to tell you, trevor, in terms of its elegance, as military doctrine, is really quite go good. and if you read the russian manuals about this, it's quite revealing as some really serious thought. it's called contactless war where we can use informational means to effect the target population of our adversary. but they're only able to do that because of our own weaknesses. look, cards face up. i mean, i'll be the last one to say that our government hasn't ever conducted a covert influence campaign. >> trevor: right. >> all right. but there is an iron law of physics with regard to covert influence, all right. you never create fractures. the only way you can make covert influence work is to identify pre-existing fractures and then worsen them and exploit them. that's what the russians are doing. >> trevor: wow. it's a fascinating book. you get into it, in depth. and it is terrifying, and also enlightening at the same time. thank you so much for being on the show.

great having you back. "the assault on intelligence" is available now. michael hayden, everybody. we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause ) acting is about reacting. give me your line. get 4 lines of unlimited data. no. for a hundred bucks a month. [laughing] plus 4 free smartphones when you switch. [crying] you see what i did there? yup. smile, you're on cricket. and we're gonna get the phone- his phone,ry sorry.

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donald trump is one of rap people's favorite guys. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> jordan: get in, get ready! it's already may 2nd, and my opponent tonight is cenk uygur, host of "the young turks." yes. he's later. this is now. first, i want to talk about a distressing attack that the m.s.m. is completely ignoring: >> take a look at these photos from adrian, michigan. yes, that's an angry mother goose attacking a golfer. isaac couling, the high-schooler participating in the golf tournament, got turned upside down, even lost his golf clubs while under assault. >> jordan: what! this goose on the