is his identity concealed because he's a victim of torture? what kind of soup is he having? is it pho, ramen, wonton? why is he so sad? is it because they forgot his salad? does he win something if he finishes all the soup? is that why the soup spoon is so big? why do these dolls have kevin spacey's hairline? do they also love children? does this end in porn or murder? why is this allowed on youtube? i have no more unanswered questions. good night. ♪ >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause )

>> trevor: welcome, everybody! thank you so much for tuning in! i'm trevor noah. my guest tonight, she's the co-host of "cbs this morning," the author of a new book and one of my favorite people in the world, gayle king is here, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) but first, i know a lot of people think we at "the daily show" are only haters when it comes to the white house. that's not true. i've always been a fan of melania trump, as a fellow immigrant she inspires me. i know i will never become president but if i work hard i might become first lady.

she's my role model. which is why today pla melania p is in my thoughts. >> melania trump is undergoing surgery for a benign cyst in her kidney. >> mrs. trump is expected to remain in the military hospital for a week. >> it could be because she's the first lady and this they want to pay extra attention. >> trevor: yeah, she's staying an extra week. i feel like after a couple of hours the doctor told her she could go home and melania is, like, no, i should stay until you check everything out, i stay longer! okay, well, ms. first lady, since we're keeping you longer, your his is on his way to visit. okay, we've tried everything. pull the plug. you're not on life support. i don't care, just try it, see

what happens. ( laughter ) what's wild about the story is look at these two people. how is she the one with the health issue? how? i mean, trump's blood type is kfc positive! he does not live a healthy life. at a rally last week trump vowed to fight for rights to have the lgbbq community. how is he healthy? ( laughter ) in other news, we're learning things about what president trump does before bed at night and it's even worse than you think. >> this week's "new york magazine" reports trump and the fox news host sean hannity speak on the phone most week nights. the report also quotes a former white house official who say hannity and fox news create a feedback mood that puts trump in a weird head space and say what ends up happening is judge jeanine or hannity fill him up with a bunch of crazy

(bleep) and we have to knock down the fires they started. >> trevor: they're like 8-year-old tree house buddies with cans on strings gossipping about which girls they secretly paid off, or whether it's yani or laurel. it's laurel, by the way. the feedback loop is weird. they're saying president trump says something outlandish to hannity on the phone. hannity repeats it on tv, then trump watches that and says, see, exactly! that's what i was saying! ( laughter ) trump is like the gorilla getting riled up about what he's doing in the mirror. you see what he did?! ( laughter ) white house staff knows what happens because the president enters the room ans and says i just hung up with hannity or ringing hannity from his desk in their presidents. how are you the president and a star? no other leader does that.

president putin doesn't talk with his assistant and say not big deal but i was a part playing an toke tore on big bang. just saying, yeah, yeah. let's move on to the main story. everyday in the news we find out a new detail like when ben carson bought a $19,000 bean bag chair or mike pence stood next to a painting of dolly madison without his wife present. the only reason we know about these stories is the trump white house has been plagued by incessant leaks and judging by his tweets the president has had enough. >> president trump on twitter, the so-called leaks coming out to have white house are an exaggeration put out by the foxe news media to make us look as bad as possible and are tray torse and cowards and we'll find out who they are. >> trevor: if i understand, trump says there is no problem

and the people responsible for the problem he will personally disemboweled. you can't say there's no problem and you're solving it. everything works down there! then why are you popping viagra? i like the taste, minty! ( laughter ) president trump is made about this leak because it made the white house look worse than usual. >> a crude joke that turned out to be no laughing madder. kelly sadler set off a fire storm with an innocencive remark about john mccain. >> sadler was in a white house meeting last week when john mccain's opposition to c.i.a. nominee gina haspel came up. according to a white house source sadler joked about the 81-year-old senator who's bat thing brain cancer who said it doesn't matter he's dying anyway. her comments were leaked to report snores who cares what john mccain thinks he's dying anyway. you have to admit that's poor taste.

this wasn't isolated. trump and mccain have had beef for years now. during the campaign, mccain said trump was firing up the crazies, so trump fired back by dissing mccain for having been a prisoner of war. when trump became president, mccain killed his healthcare plan. even from the hospital, mccain trump and said trump wasn't invited to his funeral which is the highest level of dispossible to uninvite someone from something you technically won't be at. i won't be there but i don't want you anywhere. personally i want trump at my funeral because i know he would hate being at an event that wasn't about him. i can be in a hole, too, folks! they said i was dead, too, folks! 270 electoral votes but i got them, folks, i came back! ( laughter ) trump and mccain hate each

other. when the story came out, the white house cared less about mccain's feelings and more that the story was leaked. so sarah huckabee sanders held a meeting to see about the leak. >> on the weekend, meeting, sarah sanders has a meeting saying i know somebody will leak this, then goes on to condemn people for leaking the comment press aide made about john mccain and within hours it's leaked by a group of people that included several leakers. >> trevor: so now the leakers with leaking leaks about a meeting about what leaked. ( laughter ) you know what this is like? like in a relationship when you're having an argument about how much we argue. why do we have to always argue! we don't argue! yes we do! no we don't! if you can't tell people to stop leaking without them immediately leaking you're screwed. the white house may have been focused on the leak problem but

the white house has another thing. >> why don't you apologize? >> why don't you say we're sorry. >> i wouldn't apologize. >> i wish somebody from the white house would tell the country that was inappropriate. >> it has been five days since white house aide kelly sadler made the morbid and awful remark about senator john mccain's failing health and still the white house refuses to apologize. >> trevor: wow. day five and still no apology. they make it sound like the white house is holding the apology hostage. day five, no sign of the apology yet. feels like if this goes on for long enough quincy jones is going to have to make a tribute song to help get the apology out. ♪ apology we miss you we want to set you free ♪ ♪ apology i need you now apology ♪ i love those songs. ( applause ) it's true!

if the white house had just apologized the story would be dead and they wouldn't have to worry about it. they don't even have to pint. they can just be, like, hey, we regret the joke was made and the aide has been reassigned, it's done. instead of apologizing they're digging in their heels. >> we've heard a lot about white house aide kelly sadler and her comments about senator mccain. does she still have a job? >> i won't comment on an internal staff meeting. >> i have a question. does the white house not think you need to condemn these remarks? >> again, i'm not going to comment on a week one way or the other out of an internal staff meeting. >> you know, i understand what's happening here. in trump's world, if you apologize, you're admitting that it happened. for trump, that's a sign of weakness. but here's the thing, just because it wasn't meant to get out doesn't mean you can expect everyone to act like it didn't happen. that's not how this works.

like, imagine if someone tried this technique in court. would be, like, defendant how do you plead? i plead y'all were not supposed to know nothing about my drug dealing so i'm not going to validate that with a response. yeah, you're getting life. we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause ) introducing michelob ultra pure gold

a beer inspired by nature. made with organic grains.

for a pure, refreshing taste. today, historical sites are disappearing, but ai can help us bring history back to life. to recreate historical sites, we had to stitch hundreds of pictures one by one. with microsoft ai, we are able to stitch hundreds of thousands of pictures in one night. i need to make it possible, because it's so important to do it. with artificial intelligence you can go in, you can experience it.

( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." community relations is often an i a contention subject. here to talk about a new development is our very own ronny chieng, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) >> thanks, trevor. these days a lot of people are criticizing the police. not me, of course, because i love the police. in fact, when people say (bleep) the police i say, yeah, i want to (bleep) the police. hard. i want to make love to the police. i love the police. and cops around the country are making changes. in michigan there is one police department that's going way too far. >> there is a new sheriff in

town. today the troy police department's newest officer was sworn? >> the feline unit, meet officer donuts ready to report for duty, poficer donut is the first police cat in michigan. >> we want to show the police have a human side, too. >> wow, the police got a kitten. finally, colin kaepernick can stand. how is this supposed to humanize the police? liking cats doesn't make you sympathetic. it makes you every lonely person on instagram. i get law enforcement today is willing to do anything to get people to like them except obviously not shoot black people. but this won't work because throwing cats at a problem never solved anything. i learned that hard way during a grease fire in my apartment. >> trevor: ronny, i feel like you're taking this too seriously. >> i'm seeking this too seriously? the police had the judge swear

the cat in. >> the judges performed the ceremony asking pofficer do mutt to raise her right paw. she promised to purrtect and serve, act as an ambassador to the community, be tolerant to have the canine unit and even cuddle when needed. >> first of all, if you've ever spent any time with the cat you know that oath is bullshit. the only oath a cat ever keeps is to show you his butthole and tear up your couch. >> trevor: you're heartless. >> listen how the cops treated the previous cat. >> they campaign to fill the feline unit has ups and downs. they found the original recruit officer badges has leukemia. >> good thing we have officer donuts in the wings and he was able to rise to the occasion. >> that police department is cold. the first police cat got cancer so they replaced him with another cat.

who fire as sick kitten? now officer badges isn't just dealing with kitty leukemia, he's an alcoholic, too, probably down at a local bar lapping jamison out of a saucer. >> trevor: hey, rony, i don't mean to make it personal but are you a k man? seems like this touchous. >> it is. the troy michigan p.d. treats police cats like they're little mascots and they're not. i know that because my own cat also joined the police force. do you have any idea what it's like to live with a police cat waiting up all night for sergeant mr. snug also to come home? and then one day getting a call from the chief with the words you've always dreaded -- your cat got stuck in the wall again. >> trevor: i'm so sorry, ronny chieng, everyone. we'll be right back. crying crying. >> trevor: i'm sorry.

♪ ♪ ♪ je plonge à l'envers ♪attiré par l'extase ♪ ♪ un tourbillon vert illumine les sirènes ♪ ♪ ♪ oh la fête fo', fo' ♪ ♪ ♪ oui l'endorphine s'est envolée ♪ ♪ ♪ d'une fête foraine devenue noire ♪ ♪

♪

♪

( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is an emmy award winning journalist who is the co-host of "cbs this morning" and editor trearnlg of o mag -- editor at ladies and gentlemen of the jury to o. magazine. she is author of a new book "note to self: inspiring words from inspiring people." please welcome, gayle king. ( cheers and applause ) >> hey! hello, audience! ( cheers and applause ) wow! so great, trevor. >> trevor: i'm so glad to finally have you on the show. >> so great.

>> trevor: this is great for us. >> this is my first time on the trevor noah show! >> trevor: it's great to have you and we watch you every sing daily. we watch all the news but we love watching your show every single morning. we report on news all the time and we make jokes about it and the audience laughs at it and you're in a position where sometimes you have to report the most outlandish story, and then with a straight face just carry on like nothing happened. this is live as well. are there moments where you -- >> sometimes you just have to bite the inside of your cheek as hard as you possibly can. somebody told me once if you grab the inside of your skin right here and pinch it as hard as you can that will prevent you from laughing. a couple of times i've had to do this. i was watching at the top of the show when you talked about the apology, but don't you think, trevor, if they finally come out and apologize now, will it still mean something when i have to beat you up to give me an

apology? does that feel good to you if i have to embarrass you to apologize for something? >> trevor: here's my honest opinion on it. >> yeah. >> trevor: i think many people would like the white house to apologize because it restores the pretense of normalcy of what's 457ing in washington as opposed to the actual act of apologizing. people are, like, just say it's normal again. >> yes, but in the past seems like when you're asked to apologize at this white house they double down to the opposite. >> trevor: right. >> i don't know if you get the apology it's going to mean anything. i don't think the apology is coming. >> i don't think they've ever apologized. i think the only apology i ever heard trump give was the pussy grab tape which i think he regrets because he couldn't take it back. he's like, i don't know if that's real. people are, like, you apologized. he's, like, damn it, that's why i don't apologize. ( laughter ) i want to talk to you about all the other exciting news you do. you get to cover really serious

stories. now you goat cover the royal wedding. >> the royal wedding! ( cheers and applause ) i am psyched about that. i am leaving tomorrow on a jet plane, going to england and i'm so excited about this. why? because i got up at 4:00 in the morning to watch princess deanna when she got married. got up at 4:00 to unfortunately watch the funeral. i still remember william and harry walking behind their mom's casket. that was heartbreaking. he was 12. harry's been through some stuff, been very mischievous, done some things, but it's so nice to see him come out on the other side and in love. american, divorced, older by three years, so that doesn't really count. she is so opposite of what you would expect in the monarchy. yet they're nuts about this girl. i don't know about her either. but everything we've interviewed, her friends, people at work, she seems like the real

deal. she had a life before him and the two of them are magical. >> trevor: a fairy tail. >> don't you love love? >> trevor: i love love. >> i do, too! >> trevor: it's a fairytale story. >> should we ask if you're in love, trevor noah? >> trevor: i love love. >> very good. >> trevor: let me talk to you about the book. >> yes. >> trevor: "note to self." i feel like that's what this book is about. it's about love people have for themselves, a love they may not have had expressed to them by others and now as adults they get to talk to themselves about where did the idea come from and how do you get somebody to truthfully write a note to themselves. >> it's a matter of reflecting on your life and if you could go back what would you tell your youngerself? we all have life lessons along the way. it's interesting for people. it's cathartic for some, empowering for some, painful for

some, fun and funny. i'm always amazed at how seriously people take it and so you put a lot of thought into it. i would ask the audience, if you had to think about how you had to reflect on your life, what would you tell yourself about it? >> trevor: you have oprah winfrey, joe biden, tyler perry. >> john lewis. >> trevor: this passage of tyler perry's got to me, he says, i know that you don't know this right now, writing so his younger self, but who you become is being shaped inside of every one of those bad experiences, the good, the bad and, yes, even the lig ones. they're all going to work together for your good. >> yes. >> trevor: it's powerful because you feel like in this story, i learned about tyler perry in a tiny little note to himself more things than i've learned in most interviews. >> he's the one who told me that the cathartic for him. look at his life, a mogul in hollywood. he was writing the plays, expecting a big audience, only 32 people showed up the first

night, but he now turned into it tyler perry studios which is bigger than warner brothers. it's bigger than warner brothers. what tyler perry has created in the city of atlanta, his own studios with his own sound stages, he's huge. so to come from where he came from and was abused, he talks about how he was abused as a child, to come from where he's come from to now is amazing. >> trevor: it really is beautiful. it's inspired me to write a note to myself as a kid. i thought to myself, if i could write a note to myself, what would it be? mine was (132)618-4753 which was the winning lottery numbers. >> you guys started laughing. i was, like, what does that mean? >> trevor: gayle will be co-hosting cbs news wedding coverage. "note to self" is available now. >> thank you, guise!

( cheers and applause ) so, what's new? we just switched to geico and got more. more? they've been saving folks money for over 75 years. a company you can trust. geico even helped us with homeowners insurance. more sounds great. gotta love more... right, honey? yeah! geico. expect great savings and a whole lot more. we're out of bud light! (bell ringing) ♪ (trumpets playing) ♪

let the bud light flow once again. dilly dilly! dilly dilly!!!!! need a fresh keg here too. ♪ (bell and trumpets repeat) ♪ it's really loud in my face! a keg of bud light is changed every six seconds. enjoy it fresh. growing up i didn't have anyone who looked like me. that's why i started my blog to inspire people to be themselves. the surface laptop has already made me more productive. i'm creating mood boards. i'm editing content. or i'm running around new york with a huge bouquet of balloons. so having a light laptop is a game changer. plus the battery life on the surface lives forever. my blog is sometimes about fashion, sometimes about sprinkles. it's usually always about color. find what makes you different, because that sets you apart from everyone else.