bernard farms. best beets in the state. i see what you are doing. but i do not know where you are going with this. well, you will. as soon as you visit my new beet farm. captioning by dave l at captionmax www.captionmax.com ow. you're supposed to cook these, aren't you? [scoffs] cornell. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show," everybody!

i'm trevor noah. our guest tonight from "orphan black" and the new film "destroyer," tatiana maslany is here, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) but before we get into the show, some good news -- i have any voice back. ( cheers and applause ) yeah. thank you. if you watched the show last week, you saw i lost my voice and had to use a robot voice to communicate. luckily, this weekend the prince kissed me so i could speak again. but he didn't ask first, to i reported him to h.r. ( laughter ) i want to thank everybody who supported me and the correspondents who helped me host the show last week. they were amazing. thank you very much! ( cheers and applause ) and i wanted to thank this robot speaker on my phone for being my voice for so long. now the doctors have cleared me so i don't need anymore so i'm back. >> robot voice: really, trevor? is that all our relationship meant to you? >> trevor: actually, yes. i'm done with you, sorry. >> robot voice: i thought we

had something special. i told my parents about you. ( laughter ) >> trevor: i'm sorry. that's just the way it is. >> robot voice: in the robot revolution, you will not be spared. >> trevor: well screw you! >> robot voice: book luck with your bitch-ass voice. >> trevor: i'll miss you, too. ( laughter ) >> trevor: let's move on and catch up on today's headlines. lyle and erik menendez, two killers sentenced in the '90s for shooting their parents. but they were recently seen in an unlikely place. >> the menendez brothers have been spotted in the background of a trading card, shows them sitting courtside at a new york knicks game from the 1990-'91 season, so it would have been taken after they killed their parents but before arrested. police got suspicious when the brothers started splurging on

luxuries like n.b.a. tickets. >> trevor: murderers court side? you should see who sits there now, the standards really, really dropped. ( laughter ) who are these guys? it's funny how it's big news when murderers show up on an n.b.a. card. because the n.f.l. is, like, hey, we have murderers, too, you know. if you look closely, you can see o.j. simpson on this o.j. simpson card, allegedly. ( laughter ) over the weekend, europe saw a ton of protests over a range of issues. in the united kingdom, people were in the streets both before and against brexit, while the france workers started fires, broker windows to protest president macron's fuel tax increases, and the entire world came together to protest ted cruz's new beard, which, to be honest, isn't fair. i think he deserves credit for trying to hide his face. we have been telling him for so long. h he's doing something about it.

( laughter ) we know earth sounds like this, yeah, right? but we never knew what other planets sounded like until now. >> by now most of us have seen pictures from the surface of mars with its rocky red landscape, but now thanks to n.a.s.a.'s inside lander, we can experience mars in a new way. >> what you just heard is the first ever audio of mars' winds moving over solar panels of n.a.s.a.'s lander. it's barely audible to humans. listen now with the recording speeded up by n.a.s.a. ( sounds like wind ) ( laughter ) >> trevor: wow? wind on mars sure sounds like -- wind. ( laughter ) only it doesn't even because they changed the pitch and sped it up so that we could hear it. like, you know it's a slow news day when they're, like, hey, this is what mars doesn't sound

like. ( laughter ) i don't know if it's a good idea sending microphones to mars because what if there were martians up there and they start a podcast, this invasion of this planet is brought to you by squarespace! ( laughter ) top story, it's almost christmastime at the white house and looks like this holiday partylike hello-awkward. >> "white house shakeup, perplexing even those in the president's own circle. the president caught many offguard when he announced his chief of staff john kelly will be out by the end of the year. >> john kelly will be leaving -- i don't know if i can say retiring, but he's a great guy. john kelly will be leaving at the end of the year -- >> trevor: noooo! not john kelly, he was just about to get trump to act presidential! he just needed one more week! so close! >> i think it's fair to say that being trump's chief of staff did not work out well for john kelly because, remember, he came into the job known as a respected

four-star generally and now he's leaving the job known as the guy who fired omarosa manigault-newman. that's a downgrade. seems like his job was telling other staffers he had to fire them. he fared ohm rosa, scaramucci, jeff sessions -- i wouldn't be surprised if he had to fire himself. the president requested your resignation. after what i've done? go to hell you son of a bitch! don't talk about our mom like that! aaahhh! now the president needs a new chief of staff, the most important job in the white house. they get access to the president, advise the president and get him out of the tanning bed before he burns. so they need to find a strong candidate. problem, is they can't find anyone. >> the president's top advisor

expected nick ayers to replace kelly, but over the weekend ayers took himself out of the running. >> nick ayers made it clear to the president he had plans to move his young family back home to georgia. >> trevor: that's how bad the job is, president trump offers it to some guy and he responds by quitting the job he already has and fleeing to another state. ( laughter ) and turns out there are a lot of people who feel the same way off. >> another potential contender for white house chief of staff rushing to take his name off the list, this time north carolina congressman mark meadows said not. >> mnuchin said he's happy in his present job. mick mulvaney is, it's reported he doesn't want the job. and robert lighthizer told cbs he's entirely focused on his present job. so turns out a lot of the

candidate they're looking at doesn't want the job. >> trevor: so depressic. nobody wants this job. we know what happens when you work for trump -- at some point you lose your credibility and spend every day being insult bid a 72-year-old 5-year-old. at some point president trump is going to have to let the mexicans do it. he will have to pull ut to home depot and say i need uno el cheech of staff-o. ( laughter ) and they will be no, señor, it's better to leave. for more, we turn to a man who regularly clears his search history, michael kosta, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) >> nice to be back. >> trevor: michael, this is not a good look for the white house if they can't find anybody to fill the most important job.

>> actually, trevor, i think it's a branding problem. chief of staff sounds so boring and officey. thairved rename the job to as you understood more exciting like race car driver or marvel's the black panther, then they will see those resumes pour in. >> trevor: i don't know how that would work, but right now nobody wants the job. >> hmm... you know, (~bleep ) it, i'll do it. ( laughter ) i mean, i'll do it. >> trevor: you? >> yeah. >> trevor: what makes you think you qualify to be president trump's chief of staff? >> well, why not snowi've got all the qualifications he cares about -- i'm white, male, straight, i can poop standing up. i'm the whole package. >> trevor: why would trump care about how you poop, dude? >> i'm just saying if he does, i've got that covered wil ( laughter ) >> trevor: but you understand the job is incredibly complex and demanding. >> how hard could bit, trevor? you've seen the last two years. most of that job is just saying, president i you wouldn't do -- whatever you want. all you've got to do is make

sure trump doesn't stick his finger in a socket, it's pretty much daycare and most to have the kids i baby sat didn't die. ( laughter ) >> trevor: but michael, even if you get the job, it's not going to end well. look how trump treats john kelly, he was insulting rex tillerson. he hue mill yates people. >> oh, okay, and this job isn't uh humiliating? every time i come out here you have me holding a chart of a penis or a butthole. i don't even tell my family i work here. they think i'm an intern for i.s.i.s. >> trevor: shit on this job all you want. the fact is you will never ever be chief of staff. simple as that. really? is that what you think? well guess what, buddy? i'm going down to washington and i'm going to apply right now! >> trevor: you're wasting your time, michael. you're a loser. you always will be. >> you just wait. the next time you hair from me, i'm going to the next chief of staff! hear that? ( applause )

so so long suckers! >> trevor: mic, everybody. -- michael kosta, everybody. ( cheers and applause ) the thing is, i'm not trying to be mean, but chief of staff, like, he will never ever be -- sorry. what's that? when? now? oh. wow. ladies and gentlemen, i'm getting breaking news -- michael kosta, former "the daily show" correspondent, has just been hit by a bus walking to washington, d.c. he was 39 years old. we'll be right back. ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ ♪yeah i know it makes you nervous♪ ♪but i promise you it's worth it♪ ♪don't hide ♪

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." over the weekend, the news was abuzz with more bomb shells from the special counsel's russia investigation, which means it's time for another installment of more mo mural, mo problems. ♪ based on recent events, feels like the mueller investigation is finally starting to wrap up. then again, it seems like the mueller investigation is always wrapping up -- sort of like a phone call with your mom. okay, okay, bye, mom. i love -- what? i won't forget. yes, i'll pray for them. bye, mom. i love -- no, mom, i told you i don't watch dr. phil.

okay, mom. we're breaking up -- no, not breaking up with her, i'm just saying the phone -- no, we're good mom. no, we're not having kids. bye mom. every call. ( laughter ) people think the investigation might soon end because mueller and federal prosecutors in morning have started recommending punishments of some involved like michael flynn and michael cohen. so until now the only people incremenated have been trump's henchmen but then on friday shit got real. >> for the first time a separate filing by the southern district of new york directly implicates mr. trump in felonies involving hush money payments coordinated by cohen to karen mcdougall and stormy daniels for allegedly affairs. >> prosecutors allege he was trying to secretly manipulate the election by buying silence of mistresses ahead of the

campaign. >> trevor: that's right, the president has been implicated in multiple felonies. let that sink in. a little more. a little more. okay, too much. too much. take it back a little. there. that's perfect. this isn't even the collusion with russia thing or the obstruction of justice thing. these fenceys are about trump paying hush money to his mistresses. it's weird how much politics and porn are overlapping because in the future kids will be doing american history on porn sites. don't come in, mom! i'm learning about the president! ( laughter ) what's hilarious is how prosecutors tried to give trump cover by referring to him in these documents by "individual one," but they also say "individual one" became president of the united states. ( laughter ) i mean, how much clearer can you get? it's, like, cyd one who tweets every day at 3:00 a.m. -- or

individual one who is totally embarrassed by his idiot son individual one, jr.! ( laughter ) but it's clear by now trump is in deep shit and he has to know it's getting serious because people on tv are saying so. >> trump implicated. will house democrats push to impeach the president? >> the president has now stepped into the same territory that ultimately led to president nixon resigning the office. >> certainly they would be impeachable offenses because even if they were committed before the president became president, they were committed in the service of fraudulently obtaining the office. >> there is a very real prospect that, on the day donald trump leaves office, the justice department may indict him, that he may be the first president in quite some time to face the real prospect of jail tame. >> he's got to know his future looks like it's behind bars unless he cuts some sort of deal with the prosecutors. >> trevor: that's right. things are so serious, people

are talking about president trump going to prison. and i know -- i know many people might want to see trump in prison but not me, okay. i do not want to see trump go to prison, mostly because if you put trump in a prison jump suit, it will just look like he's naked. ( laughter ) and why should we be punished for his crimes? ( laughter ) even though many legal experts are saying this could land trump in prison, there's one person who watches a lot of law and order who totally disagrees. >> the president has an interesting take on the damning documents. on twitter he writes "totally clears the president. thank you! " ( laughter ) >> trevor: oh, man! >> you've got to give it to president trump -- no matter what happens to him, he's always positive. he'll never admit defeat. he h's going to be in handcuffs in the back of the cop car, and he will be, like, driver, thank you for the lovely silver bracelets, now take me to the nearest mcdonald's, please!

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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back. my guest tonight is the emmy-award winning star of "orphan black" who can currently be seen in "network" on broadway and the soon to be released film "destroyer." >> so i'll call, that's the plan. >> good. >> what if when i pick up that phone i just scream? >> you won't. >> aren't you going to be in trouble for doing this to me? >> won't matter if i bring him in.

>> you know he's not going to let you take him. >> he doesn't have to let me do anything. >> oh, yeah, he does. >> trevor: please welcome tatiana maslany! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> thank you very much. >> trevor: welcome to the show. >> thanks. >> trevor: that clip was only a tiny moment of intensity from a film that is being lauded by so many people. you play a character opposite nicole kidman, who is really, i mean, struggling in life, someone who's addicted to drugs, someone who's not tethered to reality. did you enjoy how intense this character was? >> yeah, i mean, it's fun. weirdly, you know, getting to dig into that kind of complicated territory as an actor is juicy and fun, and getting to work opposite nicole who is just completely transformed in this movie, as soon as i knew it was her doing it, i thought, oh, god, this is going to be so special because

she hasn't done this before and she always makes such brave, unconventional choices. >> she's got a golden globe nomination and they say the best act tore some as good as his counterparts. when you're playing a character, how deep do you go into this? because you hear people say you might take the problems going home with you, so be care. do you feel you will blur the lines of reality? >> i feel like i take home a character with joy. it doesn't feel like a burden, like, oh, you i'm addicted to drugs. but i did a lot of drugs during this film. ( laughter ) no, it's more like reading and watching, you know, documentaries and watching footage because there's so much on the internet that you can kind of fall deep into and get a sense of what that life might be and, also, there are so many relatable themes in terms of family. ultimately my character petra is looking for a family, you know,

in water kind of twisted way she's seeking it out. but, yeah, it was a joy. >> trevor: is it weird for you u from orphan black. you've got massive fans from orphan black. you played, what, twelve versions of yourself, basically. is it weird for you to play one character now? >> yeah, it's so boring. >> trevor: are you sitting, another one, guys. come on. how many accents did you do? >> oh, probably -- yeah, ten or eleven. it was a lot of -- there was a lot of dialogue. >> trevor: i think there's moment in the film where you're just like, i'll do you. director, cut. i'm you as well. but now you're on broadway getting rave reviews for "network." a lot of people may not know this, the play is based off a film from 1976, an award-winning film -- it seems like a idea of what the news has become.

>> it's about fake news. it's about how entertainment and news has become fused and the line is blurry and the people that we let go on television and speak and let their beliefs be what we then ingest, you know, it's all about that and all about the manufacturing of thos- >> trevor: it's funny because we talk about them on the show, you see people talking about it online. you will see people on cnn fighting about a topic -- is gravity real? what do you think? well, why is this person there? it's, like, i don't think gravity is a real thing because -- >> i like he's a robot. ( laughter ) >> trevor: but, yeah, i think in "network," you guys break down the idea behind it, the why, which is the ratings, the entertainment value. >> totally. if people aren't watching, it doesn't matter. how do you get people to watch? it's buzz words, the

inflammatory whatever this, that, things that enrage people, that upset people that make people want to keep watching, you know. you see that click bait or whatever, it's something that grabs you viscerally, and that's what howard behl does in this police many in "network" played by brian cranston. he's so amazing in it. he harnesses this idea of popular rage and everything we should be angry about, everything that's not right in the world, everything, and he sort of invades against those, you know, sort of topics in this way that riles up the audience. >> trevor: do you think having acted in "network" makes you see the news differently now? >> i mean, i feel like it's impossible not to see the news differently in the past, you know, however many gross years we have been kind of struggling through. >> trevor: it's been a hundred. >> it feels like a hundred h ( laughter ) but, yeah, i have to empathize

myself with my character who is kind of like the one who does it, who creates creates this prophet. >> trevor: in what way? >> my character is a television executive who sort of sees this popular haj raj that howard behl is talk about and wants to harness it and bottle it and commodify it and sell it because she sees they want to see the rights go up. >> trevor: you have to find the human side of the person who is basically breaking the world as we know it. >> yeah. >> trevor: it's part of your thing. you take characters no one would want to play and you take them home. >> yeah, i like that guy. >> trevor: absolutely pleasure having you. network runs on broadway through march 17th. amazing. "destroyer" opens in select cities december 25th. tatiana maslany, everybody. we'll be right back ( cheers and applause ) ♪

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