♪ matt: you know, if there's one thing that we learned from mrs. cowboy, it's that... jake: matt, we never spoke to mrs. cowboy. oh! that's right, it's the chips. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: thank you! thank you so much! and welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! take a seat everybody! let's get into it! our guest tonight -- our guest

tonight is the oscar nominated writer and director of blackkklansman, spike lee is joining us, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) yeah, he's not here for an interview, he's just here to yell at us from the sidelines. black feet is the new black face, animal uprising has begun and president trump is almost finishing building his wall. so let's catch up on today's headlines. let's kick things off with a major story from the federal court in brooklyn. if your dream was to be a biggest drug lord in the world, a position just opened up. >> joaquin el chapo goodman is found guilty in his drug trafficking case, convicted on all ten counts, facing life in prison. >> today 12 americans, four men, eight women, after 34 hours of deliberations over the course of six days found him guilty on all ten counts.

el chapo stared directly at them the entire time the verdict was read and they stared back. >> trevor: el chapo stared down the jury? that i expected but pretty gangster the jury was staring back. i would be like delivering the verdict like, oh, i don't know anything about this trial -- ( laughter ) but they're sitting there looking at him in the eyes saying you think you're loco, man? i like jury duty! i like the part where they said 34 hours of deliberations. no, five hours of deliberations and 34 hours of booking flights out of the country, changing their names and scheduling plastic surgery. they're always going to find mexican drug lord el chapo guilty. that's a branding problem, everyone knows him. like what does chancellor rapper does for a living. he's a rapper. in his name. blackface, a new story about

this unfortunate trend in america. the governor of virginia with his blackface story, the attorney general with his blackface story, the gucci sweater, whatever that thing was from prada, and in the words of d.j. collared another one. >> katy perry is facing backlash for a shoe design that resemiabilities blackface. the shoes features a face with exaggerated red lips. though the shoes were in different colors, people pointed out the problematic image of the black ones. they have been taken off online. >> trevor: when black people said you should put yourselves in our shoes, we did not mean this, we meant jeezys! katy perry came under fire for shoes that resemble blackface. if anything, it looks like she was trying to re-create a crappy kindergarten project. but when you're living in society where certain imagery

has historically been used to dehumanize black people, you have to be sensitive. if you're a designer, a simple rhyme to help you, red lips with white skin, that's a fashion win. red lips with black skin, that shit's racist! ( laughter ) you remember that. and look, part of me was surprised these shoes got caught up in the blackface scandal but it didn't help when ralph northam was in the interview with gayle king, that didn't help the story. apparently they're great for moon talking. the t.s.a. make a list of things confiscated from luggage and revealed top three. >> "usa today" reveals t.s.a.'s wackiest things found. a giant pair of scissors at the international airport. a mortar round at the check bag at the indiana regional airport, and number one on the list is something horror movie character

freddie character might travel with, a razor glove found at hartsfield international airport in atlanta. >> trevor: who's taking that and where? that's such is a bad idea. they could have gotten away with it if they said this is my emotional support razor glove. the scissors one is super sad because there's a library now somewhere that can't open. ( laughter ) moving on to the top story. the border wall. >> what was once an outlandish promise from a guy who would never be president has turned into the country's fiercest political debate and, yesterday, president trump and former el paso congressman beto o'rourke were in el paso, texas, making their case for and against the wall. so let's kick it off with beto's rally or as trump would say losers first. >> we stand for the best traditions and values of this country, for our fellow humanity

and who we are when we are at our best. we know that walls do not save lives. walls end lives. >> trevor: whoa! walls end lives? that's terrifying! you're telling me this now? i don't want to freak anyone out but there are four walls in this room right now. they're got us surrounded. come on, guys. look, i know we don't like trump but i feel like this goes too far the other way. just because you don't support his border wall doesn't mean you have to hate all walls in general. yes, trump's border wall is offensive, but don't forget there are a lot of good walls out there, okay. hard-working, everyday walls, doing the job nobody wants to do, holding up your pictures, supporting ceilings and separating bedrooms from bathrooms. without walls how would we have spontaneous sex? you couldn't. you would pick up the person and realize you're not strong

enough. she's heavier than she looks. you're stumbling, falling, no wall to catch you and the neighbors can see you because there's no wall and you're on the ninth floor so you both fall to your death! the point is not all walls are bad. ( laughter ) look, i'll be honest, i'll be honest, there wasn't much comedy out to have the beto o'rourke rally. it made sense, he doesn't mispronounce words, but the only piece of advice i would give him is, beto, if you're going to run for president you can't have conga drums in is background. the civil war uh would have turned out differently if lincoln would have given the gettys burg address in front of congas, four score and seven years ago -- boo! we like slavery now! so no major announcements out of the beto rally. so 10,000 people went to watch an unemployed guy talk ability his vision of america. ( laughter )

the d.j.t. ratings teams had him in el paso pushing for the wall. before the rally starktsd news broke congress reached a bipartisan deal to give trump $1.37 billion in funding for a border wall. or some type of barrier. and i mean that is nice for trump that he got something, although if you have been paying attention you will realize it's actually $200 million less than congress was ready to give him before the shutdown. part o-- art of the deal. yeah, but trump didn't care. he was too excited about the rally to worry about the stupid details. >> i'll have to tell you, as i was walking up to the stage, they said that progress is being made with this committee. so maybe progress is being made, maybe not, but i had a choice. i could have stayed out there and listened or i could have come out to the people of el paso and texas. ( cheers and applause )

i chose you. just now! just now! i said, wait a minute! i got to take care of my people from texas! i got to go! i don't even the want to hear about it. ( cheers and applause ) i don't want to hear! >> trevor: did he just turn into bill cosby there? what was that? i don't know! i don't know! i got to go! build the wall! but that was a pretty insane admission. right? president trump is saying instead of getting informed and then passing that information on to his audience, he would prefer to just get them riled up. that's what he wants. he said, i don't want to go talk to the people. thank god he's the president and not my doctor. the numberses wanted to show me a chart of your diagnosis but i didn't have time for that, time to clies slice and dice! i got this freddy krueger glove i got from the t.s.a.! ( laughter ) trump was in rally mode.

he didn't care about facts and figures. he was so excited because he was going to release his remix to build the wall. ( audience chanting ) >> now, you really mean "finish that wall" because we built a lot of it. finish that wall. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: they built a lot of it? wait? what? so now we're doing "finish the wall?" i don't know how much actual work they're doing on the border but in trump's world they're making progress. build the wall! finish the wall! build another wall! on top to have the old wall! double-decker wall! ( cheers and applause ) to be fair to trump, even though zero new miles of wall have been built under trump, when he says we built a lot of wall, trump talked about he upgraded some of the existing fencing into taller fencing. so he solved the problem of smugglers determined to sneak drugs into america but too lazy

to buy a somewhat taller ladder. as we all know, border security isn't just about walls, right? at one point trump started to talk about how dogs can also help detect drugs on the border but much like a dog himself, trump got distracted. >> we have equipment now that can spot drugs. it's incredible stuff. by the way, there is nothing better than a good old fashioned german shepherd. it's hard to believe. you do love your dogs, don't you? i wouldn't mind having one, honestly, but i don't have any time. how would i look walking a dognan the white house lawn? ( cheering ) a lot of people say, oh, you should get a dog. why? it's good politically. i said that's not the relationship i have with my people. >> obama had a dog. >> yeah, obama had a dog, you're right. >> trevor: yeah, obama had a dog! ha ha ha! what? did that guy just scream obama had a dog, like it's a bad thing? that's how much trump has persuasion over his people at

these rallies. he managed to turn white people against dogs. dogs! the thing people -- white people love more than anything. when people choose a movie, they aren't choose anything where a dog dice. imlol and me is too sad, a dog dice. let's watch schindler's list. trump should love dogs. they pee all over your bed and you don't even have to pay them. ( audience reacts ) i know! bad dog! bad dog! bad dog! who made that joke?! who made that joke?! ( laughter ) so last night's trump rally was a trump rally. he'll build a wall, the wall is almost finished, he'll build the wall out of dogs. ( laughter ) one thing we learned is the president seems to struggle with numbers, too. >> by the way, we, i, we -- i'm one and one. i'm one for one. think of it. we had one election, we won. now we're going to be two for 0

and everything is going to be perfect. >> trevor: yep, yep, that's right, trump is one for one and if he wins again he will be two for 0! that's not how math works but at least we know how trump successfully negotiated negative $200 million for his wall. we, i, we will be right back! ( cheers and applause ) hey! alright, let's get going! and you want to make sure to aim it. i'm aiming it. ohhhhhhh! i ordered it for everyone. [laughing] (dad vo) we got the biggest subaru to help bring our family together. i'm just resting my eyes. (dad vo) even though we're generations apart. what a day. i just love those kids. (avo) presenting the all-new three-row subaru ascent. wave to grandma, everybody. (avo) love is now bigger than ever.

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cover the big animal stories in the news, we turn to our "the daily show" animal expert my australian cousin with a new segment we call (~bleep ) these animals! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ thanks, trevor! yeah! (australian accent) i used to like animals until one day my animal steve irwin got stabbed in a water by a bloody sting way. everyone says they're harmless. try to tell that to steve. you can't because of a murdering stingray so that's why i say (~bleep ) these animals. first on my shit list, polar bears. the myth about these four leg ged cotton balls is they're always playing in the snow and drinking coca-cola. but in reality they drink pepsi and can snap a man's head clean off! and recently they have been

invading russian cities. >> the unusual invasion causing a state of emergency that has families afraid to leave their homes in run russian town. >> a wild scene, bears and cubs rummages through a land phil, wandering down a hallway. in this small arctic town they counted at least 52 bears. with sea ice disappearing the animals are spending more time on land. >> as if your winters weren't hot enough, let's three in killing machines. hate polar bears for the same reason i hate pandas. they're cute but diddly. come in looking like a teddy bear then rip you apart! getting attacked would be so cute. nobody would help you because i think it's adorable. oh, now, the bear seating his legs! look how cute it is! meanwhile down in south america,

entire villages are overrun by the hip pot mouse. >> a brief glimpse of a giant native only to africa now running wild in colombia. the story of the hippo starts here in the former estate of pablo escobar who had four hip poes smuggled here for his private soovment it's not uncommon to spot a 3,000-pound pipo walking around town. >> the hippos are dangerous, a territorial species. >> in africa, hippos cause more human deaths than any other large animal. >> trevor: what's worse? cocaine hippos! ( laughter ) evidently, pablo escobar got so bored smuggling dope he needed another challenge. aaahhh! drugs are too easy! bring me some illegal african land whales! i'm a south african doing a australian doing a colombian accent. take that!

( cheers and applause ) so now, pablo's been dead 25 years but his hippos are still running around colombia ruining the ecosystem and causing traffic jams. (~bleep ) these animals! by the way, kids, if you do see a hippo, leave the bloody thing alone, steer clear! they are the most lethal animal in africa. that's right. even deadlier than the aids lions. trevor would confirm that but he's gone to the louvre. the thing about his pig horses is they're pretty hard to get rid of. >> the hippos were then allowed to just roam free. >> yes. >> and they had offspring. how many are there now? >> about 50 hippos or more. there's a huge area, and that's a paradise for the hippos. >> paradise because they have no predators and ample food and water. >> trevor: oh, blamey, those are hungry, hungry hippos.

and there are 40 or 50 so there are some horny, horny hippos, which is the automated version of the game those aren't marbles in their mouth, mike. people have to stop bringing these animals where they don't belong because they screw things up for us humans, like the story out of texas. >> the cbs houston affiliate khou says a tiger was found inside an abandoned home. authorities received an anonymous call yesterday from people who had gone into the home and, yes, discovered a tiger. >> they were going into this vaguent house to smoke marijuana and discovered -- they were greeted by a large tiger. he's in a rinky dink cage that could easily bust open secured with a nylon strap. >> trevor: this story pisses me off the most because that tiger ruined those people's high. ( laughter ) just imagine, you go into an

abandoned house to smoke weed and you see a bloody tiger. you're probably, like, what kind of weed is this! ( laughter ) that house cat looks like a tiger! so then you got to pet the cat but it's a bloody tiger, mate, so it rips your arm clean off! then you're got one arm and the worst part is that's the arm that had the joint in it. (~bleep ) these animals! the other thing, who moves out of their house and forgets their tiger? what guy is leaving the house, keys, wallet, what am i missing? oh, yeah, my 300-pound jungle monster! to sum up, folks, hide your rubbish from bears, never let drug lord hippos have unprotected sex, and a second reason not to go into abandoned houses, the first reason is pedophiles. don't forget (~bleep ) these animals. back to you, trevor! >> trevor: thanks, australian trevor, we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause )

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-right? -should it? when you bundle home and auto... run, alan! ...you get more than just savings. you get 'round-the-clock protection. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a legendary filmmaker whose latest movie "blackkklansman" is nominated for six academy awards including best director. >> he says no one wants to be called a bigot anymore. i guess archie bunker made that too uncool. so the idea is under all these issues, everyday americans can accept it. support it. until eventually, one day, he gets somebody in the white house that embodies it. ( laughter ) >> sarge, come on. america would never elect somebody like david duke president of the united states of america. >> coming from a black man, that's pretty naive. >> trevor: please welcome

spike lee! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ welcome back to the show. >> glad to be here. >> trevor: i could not help noticing your hat and your hoodie 1619. if governor northam has taught me anything it's that that is a very significant year in america's history. >> yes, 400 years ago today, this year, slaves were brought from africa to jamestown, virginia. >> trevor: right. >> 400 years. so i just felt that that's part of our american history and we need to know about it? right. >> 400 years this year, jamestown, virginia, and you think it's ironic all this stuff is happening about race in virginia starting back to recently, back to charlottesville? >> trevor: when you look at the news today and the movie you

made "blackkklansman," i remember watching the film and thinking i cannot believe this took place this many decades ago and feels like a movie from 2018. >> i think it's an example of how we've made progress, but not as such as we hope to be. >> trevor: right. >> when our brother obama, president obama, when he put his hand on that bible, i kept reading stuff about post-racial something, like the moment his hand touched that bible, hocus pocus, gone, evaporated. >> trevor: right. >> i will not trimpg that kool-aid. i didn't believe it one second. >> trevor: it's an interesting time. what i think connected with so many people about your film is that if you haven't watched it, it genuinely is an amazing film. it's funny, it's gripping.

it's historical at the same time, and it's a powerful story about a black man who infiltrates the k.k.k. over the phone just by saying the right racist things to them. what's interesting is even then the k.k.k. is starting to evolve and saying we can't function as an organization. >> david duke, the grand wizard. >> he's saying we need to be racist in a way that's palatable to other people. >> take off the hood and cape and put on a suit and tie. >> trevor: why was that so important for you to put into the movie? >> what i tried to do along with my co-writer, we wanted to connect the past with the present, we didn't just want to look at the film and say, oh, this happened in the '70s and forget about it. >> trevor: right. >> to tell the best story that we knew as film-makers, we had to connect the past with the present. that's why i think it's resonated so, not just the united states but globally this

film is made an impact. >> trevor: it's made an impact not just with the audiences but the academy as well, nominated for six academy awards, which is amazing. really amazing. it's amazing. ( applause ) and this honestly surprised me, your first nomination for best director. >> and best picture. >> trevor: and best picture. >> yep. >> trevor: that seems like a long time coming for spike lee. ( cheers and applause ) ( laughter ) >> trevor: no, like what's interesting, is i mean, it's hard for you to say this of yourself but it feels like, for a long time, people have said, look, we're not saying this is against black people, but you have to think of voters. who are the people who are voting for -- >> anytime -- for me, anytime there's an award, the first thing i ask myself, who's voting. >> yes. >> and it was april rain who

started the #oscars so white and cheryl boonizics who was the president to have the academy of motion pictures, arts and sciences, those two sisters, african-american women, both of them put stuff forward. so the voting members would be more diverse. i would have not got six nominations or anybody since then, since #oscars so white if not for the diversity of the voting memberships. >> trevor: and when you -- >> it wasn't like that back in 1989. >> trevor: no, not at all. when you look at the year when do the right thing -- >> 1989, another summer, bring a funky drummer. ( laughter ) that's public enemy, fight the power. >> trevor: you had a film that was -- many people said was snubbed in favor of driving miss daisy, which was a movie about a black person in a car with a white person, and green book is

nominated this year, another movie with a black person and a white person in a car. are you having flashbacks? >> you know what? i hope the new york knicks get zion. ( laughter ) duke university, we're losing games. hopefully we get 'em. that's my answer. >> trevor: i'll take it. good luck to you on the show and congratulations on your oscar nomination. "blackkklansman" is currently in select theaters and available on demand. spike lee. we'll be right back! ( cheers and applause ) ♪

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or doing goat yoga at this mountain resort? or treating a destination wedding to the sweet sound of pug bongos? because hotels.com lets me do me. where my dogs at? oh, here they are. hotels.com. you do you and get rewarded. take it away henry. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: that's our show for tonight. thanks for tuning. now here it is... your moment of zen. >> how would i look walking a dog on the white house lawn? would that be -- ( cheers and applause ) >> we have adobe bark at the hotel and i'm going to take it for a walk. >> thank you. >> i'll be back in a few minutes. okay, good. you take your dog, go outside,

it's freezing and you walk around for a while and it's not that easy. okay, be careful. the fact she trusted me with that dog was amazing. probably she shouldn't have but it worked out. - our love is too grand for east berlin. why don't we build a [bleep] tunnel underneath the berlin wall? [laughs] - elizabeth says, i'm actually a trans woman. john says, i'm gonna get that money for her. i'm gonna rob a bank. i'm robbing a bank. i feel wasted. - and edie says, if my love isn't real, no [bleep] love is real. i feel like i could puke tonight. - let's do it. [patriotic music] ♪ [jazz music]