will almost definitely be turned into a second-rate christmas special next year. >> well, it may just be new york's unofficial new holiday mascot. a small owl found inside the rockefeller christmas tree tree. >> a worker found it tucked away in the branches. it's a small bird called a saw wood owl, the smallest in the northeast, recovering at the ravens beard wildlife center. it's getting lots of love and attention and has its own twitter page. >> very nice, and it's own little turtleneck, too. >> trevor: oh -- my -- god! can we take a second to appreciate how frickin' cute this owl is? baby yoda probably put a hit on him as we speak. he's so cute, i want one. i want to go get a little owl right now. aaahhh! that was a mistake.

owls are not pets. but, still, what a fun story, an owl hitched a ride to new york city -- although i guess it looks different if you're an owl. from the owl's perspective, we moved his house. one night he's living in the woods, next morning he's paying manhattan rent. he's used to snacking on field mice but in new york the only thing to hunt are the rats which are ten times the size of that owl. the rat will be saying, just to be clear, who's eating who? i don't like the idea of getting the owl a twitter account. we like him now. once we start riding the tweets, wow, owl lives matter? unfollow! let's move on to donald joe biden beat my ass trump. none of his legal efforts to undo the election have been working, so now he's trying a different approach. you might remembert that, yesterday, two republican

election officials in michigan tried to throw out votes from the entire city of detroit, and then they have to be shamed into backing down. turns out that wasn't the end of the story. >> breaking overnight, republican election officials in michigan changed their minds again. first they refused to certify the election results in wayne county, then agreed to certify them. now they're trying to to rescind that decision despite a lack of evidence. >> we're learning donald trump called both of them following the meeting. >> trump campaign has been pressuring bratt rathlingsburger. anytime trump stionz targets a person publicly they get death threats and have to get security. he and his wife have received death threats. arizona democratic secretary katy hobbs says she's faced threats of ongoing escalating

violence. this shows reporters outside her house chanting, we are watching you. >> trevor: that's right, people, donald trump, president of the united states is working to overturn the election. people, can we agree this is not normal, seeing donald trump wort normal, but it's happening. trump is personally, listen to this, trump is personally calling election officials and targeting them in public hoping to pressure them into overturning the election results, which i don't care who you are, it's deeply disturbing because, before now, he was at least pursuing his claims through the courts. yeah, it wasn't fun, but it was legal. it's the difference between camping on call of duty and smashing the control over your brother's head. one is bat sportsmanship, the other is all the. and they're not even anonymous death threats. which makes sense because trump

would blow his cover right away -- if you don't overturn the results, you're going to be in big trouble! tremendous trouble! people tell me all the time, wow, what tremendous trouble he's in! mr. president, i know that's you. no, it's not! it's not me! it's bonald. but this shows there's no winning when it comes to donald trump. if he doesn't like you you get death threats. if he does like you he gives you covid. while the president's team is still fighting the election in court, it's become clear even that strategy isn't really just about pursuing legal options. >> "the washington post"'s bob costa reports giuliani's team knows the president can't win and instead are trying to make sure the vote is not certified. quote, their end game, to try to force it to the house. >> it's a legal game that they're playing. if they can tie this up in court, if they can create enough dowrkts then they are hoping that the states just won't

certify the election, and if the states don't certify these elections, it goes to the house of representatives where donald trump has a very good chance of being named president of the united states, so there's a legal trick they're trying to pull here, throw enough garbage in everybody's face that maybe these elections don't get certified, maybe he can steal it in the house. >> trevor: trump's supporters are telling people they don't need to win in court, they just need to create a messy situation where republican legislators will step in and overturn people's votes. forgive me but it's so astounding me that america's laws can allow this kind of thing to happen. there are all these safeguards, double checks, protections for every single vote, but if a legislature is a different party than the winner, they will be, like, no, we're going to pick our guy instead. it's like if you set up two authenticationings for you

accounts but give it to vladimir putin for saf safekeeping. it's extremely unlikely it will work, although a lot of extremely unlikely things have happened recently. if you had told me two years ago that the next wonder woman movie would be going straight to h.b.o. max, i would have said what's h.b.o. max? actually, i'm still saying that. what is hbo max? is that the same as h.b.o. go? or is that h.b.o. now, or is it, like, both of them? do i have it? am i on it? on the other hand, what might save america from donald trump trying to overthrow the government is that it's donald trump trying to overthrow the government because his people are not known for being that great at what they do. i mean, just today, rudy giuliani, the president's personal lawyer and something kids fear is in the closet gave a press conference to explain why donald trump actually won

the election, all right? that's what he was doing. he was trying to explain to us why donald trump actually won the election that we all saw him lose, but we couldn't pay attention to this conspiracy theory because we were all distracted by this -- >> many of the absentee ballots were fraudulent and they knew that. and they didn't want to have count of that. 200% of the registered voters in a district vote. what does that mean? in the states that we have indicated in red -- georgia, pennsylvania, michigan, wisconsin, nevada and arizona -- we more than double the number of votes needed to overturn the election. all you've got to do to find out if i'm misleading you at all is to look at the lawsuits. that's the reason why he probably didn't have to go out and campaign. >> trevor: okay, i know this could be the end of american democracy, but, guys, this shit is hilarious. i mean, trump always said that he had leakers in his

administration but i didn't know it was this bad. what the hell was going on with rudy? honest question, was his hair dye dripping? was his brain shitting itself? honestly i didn't know side burns got periods. you know your legal strategies is (~bleep ) up when your hair starts crying about it. it was going down both cheeks. he was growing a chin strap beard in realtime. i'm not going to lie, part of me feels bad for rudy because this was the biggest press conference of his life, his big chance to get donald trump another term as president, and his hair riewnld the entire moment. can you imagine if abraham lincoln was reading the emancipation proclamation and his beard just walked away? people would have been like, hey, yo, yo, yo, forget about the slaves, man, your chin hair just bounced, b. you got to look at that shit. maybe this is the per feck combination of evil and

ridiculous to end the trump era. i think it's perfect. think about it, if someone said in 2016 that this whole thing would end with rudy giuliani openly plotting a coup against the government but no one would take him seriously because he had hair die running down his face the entire time, you would be like, yeah, you know what? this sounds about right. we'll take a short break. when we come back, we'll talk about what changes people are making to thanksgiving this year to save grandma's life. after that, bill gates is joining me on the show. don't go away.

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"the daily social distancing show. thanksgiving is the day you remember which of your uncles is weird. all right. it's all of them. but with the pandemic here, america is treating thanksgiving a little bit differently, and we'll find out how different in our special segment thanksgiving in the time of corona. ♪ ♪ with thanksgiving just a week away, this is the time of year when americans would normally be fighting over whether to get the canned cranberry sauce or the good canned cranberry sauce. but in corona, the big question is whether to have thanksgiving at all. ♪ ♪ ♪ >> there's no place like home for the holidays, and that indulgent thanksgiving feast with friends and family, but coast to coast, cases of the coronavirus are on the rise, and travel plans are changing.

in a recent survey, 47% of americans say they're going to cancel. >> there is growing concern the upcoming thanksgiving holiday could turn into a superspreader event. >> new york's mayor bill de blasio announcing the macy's thanksgiving parade are will go virtual this year. >> experts are calling the hundreds of thousands of college students traveling across the country for the holidays little ticking time bombs. >> trevor: oh, yeah! perfect holiday week for corona. young people come home from colleges, party indoors at home down and line up with their oldest relatives? corona would be one more shitty thing kids bring home from college because college kids only brings homes what no one wants -- piles of dirty laundry, shight tasty beer, a boyfriend who talks too much. shut up and pass the potatoes!

i think they shall cancel the parade. why do i want to watch the virtual spongebob when i can watch the actual spongebob? why am i tocking to you when i could be watching spongebob? ha ha, you never win, squid. but with the pandemic, many people don't want to cancel thanksgiving altogether. you don't need to as long as you take simple precautions. >> if you have no choice but to have dinner indoors, be sure to open the windows. >> really let that outdoor air circulate in. it will get nice and cold but you will get a lot of air exchange and it will really create the outdoor environment indoors. >> eat at separate tables if dining inside. >> the safest thanksgiving will be spent virtually apart but together. vacuum is trying to help out. they will lift the 40 minute time limit so your thanksgiving video calls can go on for as long as you like.

>> trevor: whoa, zoom is allowing unlimited calls? do they not realize how much they are screwing us over? people! that 40 minute time limit was a get out of jail free card! yeah! you can thank zoom this year when you're on a three-hour call with your cousin explaining his foot surgery. you see, trevor, it's called a metatarsal, and in the foot there are many bones, the smaller they can break and fracture and connect to the meniscus through the achilles tendon which can be pulled slightly but the doctor said what? we can fix it! but a lot of these suggestions are smart, like opening the windows is a great idea, it improves ventilation and social distancing because, you see, once the room is freezing and the food is cold, everyone will get back in their cars and go home. i have an idea, instead of playing your annual touch

football game, keach social distance by playing paint ball. don't tell anyone else you're laying paint ball. if you're the only one with a gun, you automatically win. a smaller guest list means a smaller turkey, and weird as it seems, even that is creating a problem this year. >> health officials are urging people to pass on that big traditional large family gathering. >> and that has led to a weird dilemma. there's a run on small turkeys. >> turkeys 10 to 14 pounds are in high demand with consumers ordering picked over freezer cases with only 20-pound birds left behind. that has created a shortage of smaller birds. >> since the growth time of a turkey starts in a summer it's hard to control their size. >> they're going to grow at the pace they're going to grow at. you can't say we're going to put you on a diet, that just doesn't work. >> trevor: all right, everybody! we get it! we discovered the most american

problem of all time. you're worried even your food is too overweight? that farmer is right, you cannot put a turkey on a diet, butt what you can do is tell them their high school reunion is coming up. they will be eating salad with dressing on the side for a month. how would a turkey diet even work? listen up! this is called a juice cleanse. for a week, you all will be drinking lemon juice with cayenne pepper and, you know what? this seems more normal on instagram. now that i'm saying it in real life, it's strange ( gobbling ) but everybody has to eat the big turkeys because if we don't eat them this year, that means they will only get bigger next year. then by the next year we'll be wrestling the turkey about who is going in the oven ( gobbling and screaming ) finally, one more way corona is making thanksgiving more difficult than usual. if the whole family isn't gathering at grandma's house

this year, that means they can't just make grandma do all the cooking. >> with more people staying at home for thanksgiving, more americans will be cooking for the first time and they are stressed. campbell's shows two thirds of americans are dreading the possibilities of an epic cooking fail. >> with more amateur cooks hitting the kitchen this year one firefighter says it could be a recipe for disaster. >> it's easy to see how they get distracted, walk away from a stove top, from an oven, and the next thing you know is we have a disaster. >> if culinary arts isn't your calling, then cooking a thanksgiving turkey can be tricky. that's why whole foods teamed up with progressive insurance to provide their first ever thanksgiving turkey protection plan. if you have a turkey cooking fail, whole foods is offering a $35 gift card as insurance. all customers will need a receipt, a picture of the failed

turkey and explanation of what went wrong. >> trevor: whole foods actually wants a picture of a failed turkey? my only question is, will they accept one of the president of the united states? ♪ ♪ but for real, though, man, you could not have a better embodiment of the problems facing america than right here. on a day when people gather during a deadly pandemic to binge eat, it's the turkey that has a solid insurance plan. this is why i play it safe and microwave my turkey. it's quick, it's easy, and you can use all that extra time that you save to deal with the salmonella you contract. looks like, corona or not, america will find some way to celebrate thanksgiving thanksgiving this year. but please, no matter how you do it, just try and be as safe as you can because this pandemic is no joke, and the most important thing about thanksgiving is making sure that you are around for the next one. all right, when we come back,

bill gates will tell me why the internet thinks that he's trying to brainwash all of us. you don't want to miss it. do you want to see something cool? a man cave. -it's hot in here. you might be more comfortable if you remove your fur pelts. i already did. dun. dun. dun? this place is changing everyone. there are showers. so much food. and separate rooms. tell me about my room, mr. betterdad. right this way. -betterman. give this place a chance. do i have to like him? gruggers. grug. [ screams ] grug. you have to be nice. -ok.

been there, done that. twice your cousin. from boston. karen, i'm just gonna say what everyone here is thinking. you look smokin. total smokeshow. and they never did find his finger. they had to close the pool for like an hour. ♪ i brought a date. name's sam. dig in. love is like boston lager. rich, complex and it's over too soon. right, chrissy? oh my god. ♪ so come december, she'll get to be holiday tessa.

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it's the easiest because it's the cheesiest. kraft. for the win win. i love this view. i love that every time this commercial airs, i get to drink another mountain dew. ♪ "the daily social distancing show. so earlier today, i spoke to bill gates. we talked about the coronavirus, when the vaccine would arrive and how long it will be before we're back in the streets kissing strangers again. bill gates, welcome back to "the daily social distancing show. >> good to see you. >> trevor: you last joined us on the show, i would say it was

about seven months ago, and seven months ago, just like dr. fauci, you said you were worried because you felt like the worst was yet to come. a lot of people accused you of ped licofped lick fare and terr. why does it sound like we're worse at handling this? >> a couple of things are working against us. first is with the winterer, we're colder, the virus multiplies and we're indoor more. that's not good. there's a certain fatigue, certain things people have had to do in staying away from friends, that's tougher. this round, europe is getting better compliance with the restrictions than the u.s. and they're starting to see a downturn. >> trevor: when you talk about

the compliance and the downturn, should we be looking at the virus cases or should we be looking at the deaths? i never know which one is more important. the news is like 5 million, 7 million, then some doctors say, yes, but fewer people are dying because we know how to treat it. how should we be looking at the virus and the fight we have against it? >> well, the cases are the leading indicator. it is true that cases are translating into less deaths for two reasons. one is that the cases are more in the young people who are less likely to be very sick, and the other is that the quality of treatment including some new drugs like dexamethasone have been proven out. so when you do get hospitalized, you have a higher chance of survival. but, you know, we're predicted to go back up to over 2,000 deaths a way in the months ahead. so for the next six to eight months, the news is mostly bad.

after that, the volume of the vaccine will have kicked in and then we'll have -- you know, there's light at the end of the tunnel. >> trevor: wow. i mean, the question is, then, i think, for a lot of people, is how long is that tunnel, how bad does that tunnel get and how do we stop it from being the worst possible tunnel. one to have the biggest things people are worried about is the trandigs between joe biden and donald trump. you've worked with governments all over the world working on their vaccine distribution, healthcare around the planet, you know how important it is for one administration to talk to the next when it comes to handing off on their plans. how much do you think this will actually affect america's response if there isn't a transition? >> well, it's you be fortunate that, you know, the current administration got tied into a positive narrative that, you know, we're turning the corner in that you now have this transition. it will make the message a lilt

less clear. this is when you would love to see the best c.d.c. people on tv reminding us about social distancing and masks, you know, and particularly when there is that fatigue out there. so leaders at all levels, this is a chance to step up, even though politicians are encouraging friendst that, you know, we don't want this additional 700,000 deaths, you know, it would be tragic to be the last person who dies, you know, when the vaccine is absolutely on the way, and, you know, so i think the good news should drive compliance, not laxity. >> trevor: as somebody who's done work globally around healthcare for so long, especially around infectious diseases, what if you found convinces community members to

buy into methods that keep them safe? >> we had vaccine resistance with polio and they're getting religious leaders to speak out to have them visibly vaccinating their own children. for a while it looked like we had never stopped polio in africa but it's now certified three years without polio. activating the trust hierarchy and getting rid of the conspiracy political element and reminding people in this case it's about saving lives, and in that case it's about kids not being paralyzed, when you get people back to that very human impact if we don't behave well, i think, you know, then it will often come through. >> trevor: it's interesting that you bring up conspiracies because conspiracy theories about you online are insane on social media, and social media has propagated them in a way that bill gates is trying to create vaccines so he can control your minds and he wants

to vaccinate everybody so he can implant -- i think they said you're going to change our dna so we turn into something and work for you somewhere -- i don't know the full story, i'm still learning it. when you see these things, first of all, have you been able to track where it comes from, and secondly, i know you think about these things, you're one of the biggest thinkers i know, have you even thought about the motivation? because i've always tried to figure out who benefits from a conspiracy theory, and few thought about how many people won't get a vaccine because they believe conspiracy theories. >> usually when you work on infectious diseases like dr. fauci, you're kind of obscure. nobody talks much about t.b. or malaria. so here we have this complete turnaround where, vaccines, are they good for people are now front and center, and there's always been a small group of

anti-vaccination people, and we see this with measles vaccine. they've now gone on a platform and joined forces with some political conspiracy views, and it's so easy to click on, particularly when a simple explanation for this pandemic, oh, there is somebody evil behind it, you know, is somehow easier than, you know, the true biology, which is actually kind of complicated. so, you know, we have to make the truth more interesting, and, you know, we've got to label things with the truth, and, sadly, the naivety about how to make social media work well is pretty strong, and that's coincided with the election and the epidemic. i wish i had the answer, but, you know, it's out there in big, big numbers and hasn't -- it just keeps growing. >> trevor: so when we look at the vaccine now, i mean, that's now the story. now the world is waiting for the vaccine because the vaccine becomes the key that unlocks the

door. as you said, the light at the end of the tunnel. the question then is how do people get the vaccine, how effective will the distribution method be and how difficult is that? >> well, the vaccine is going to be in short supply. the good news is that there's four other vaccines that are likely to get approved fairly quickly as well. the fact that pfizer worked so well makes us optimistic about the other companies, which those are cheaper and much easier to scale and don't recall that cold chain, so we'll have a lot of vaccines, and we need to prioritize people at risk -- elderly people, people who work in nursing homes -- and each country will have to decide, okay, who goes first. that's still a little bit confused in the u.s., but hopefully we'll get that straightened out very, very soon because the vaccine is likely to be shipped a lot in the month of

december. >> trevor: as you said, the anti-vaccine community has only grown over time. i think the u.s. is now the biggest hub of anti-vaxxers in the world. it started as a fringe thing with measles and with coronavirus and politics it's been amplified. some people on the liberal side will say i don't trust the vaccine, it was made under trump. others will say i don't trust that vaccine, that came from joe biden and the democrats, they're trying to brainwash us. a lot of people won't want to take the vaccine which may go towards everything we've worked on. how do you go about making sure the vaccine is safe amidst this political crisis? >> it's clear the f.d.a. went through the professional staff there all the things they're supposed, to likewise pfizer. there's even an external committee that will weigh in to make absolutely sure the political desire to get this

quickly did not infect the efficacy and safety review, and i feel very confident because the people involved are really doing their job well. we don't need everyone to take the vaccine. society will have to decide if there are some jobs like going to a nursing home, you know, and taking care of somebody's grandparents, whether that person, you know, how strongly you encourage them to have a vaccine so they're not spreading the disease. but with this level of efficacy, if we can get to 75% dosed, then you will block the spread of the disease. with measles, you would have to get to, like, 95% because it's even more infectious. but the good news here is that we just need that majority. i think as people see people taking the vaccine and they see that the side effects if any are very, very rare, that confidence

will build, and that will be good for society because, when you take the vaccine, you're helping to protect other people. >> trevor: don't go away. when we come back, we'll have >> trevor: welcome back tobigot.

"the daily social distancing show. here is part two of my

interviewf with bill gates. let's talk about climate change because that's another one of bill gates' passions, another thing bill gates has been doing for a long time. you have strange hobbies. i play video games. you do malaria and climate change. let's talk a little bit about that. how much have we gone backwards in this period in terms of fighting climate change andt what do you think are some to have the concrete steps we can take that moves us to a place where we're not just destroying our home or place on the planet but also are acknowledging people have jobs to the current way we make energy. >> the good news is there's awareness as a problem in the u.s. is going up. our president-elect cares a great great deal about this issue. he may not get the full amount of money he talked about being ideal, but if we prioritize that money on innovation, new ways of

making cement and steel, then i view it as a very solvable problem. so it's a lot like the pandemic where innovation is what will get us out of this. we have to incent, the private sector, particularly very inventive people, to give us these solutions, and the government owes it to us to get the best scientists, the best experts and invest early on so that we're not getting into the problem because, once climate change comes, you can't get out of it. there's not like a vaccine for that. so i'm really pleads it hasn't let the agenda of all young voters of both parties and, so, you know, i'm hoping during the next four years to make sure the prioritization of the high impact spending is there. you're right, we have to try and create new industries in any place where the switch away from

hydrocarbons is going to hurt the economy. >> trevor: do you think that maybe part of the problem with getting everybody on board climate change is they hear doom and gloom, they hear the planet will be dead in 10, 15 years, and the planet is still around and they go, oh, clearly this is not real. >> well, when i look back and say why didn't my warnings about the pandemic lead to more activity, you know, i have to say, you know, should i have made the grimness even more vivid or, you know, told more people that bad news? so if you want people to prepare in advance, you really do have to at least in some ways show the potential negative outcomes. >> trevor: right. >> now, we can couple that with, hey, with innovation, you can create the high-paying jobs, and the u.s. is rich enough that we can make the transition even for the areas that are negatively

affected, not super severe, if we're enlightened about that. having the common base of facts, like is climate change a problem, is it hard to solve, you know, was there really a chance of a pandemic coming? there, you want to build a consensus, and once you get things underway, i agree emphasizing, like, the heroes in the front line on the pandemic, the great scientists, you know, who created this way of making vaccines, it's going to help us with lots of other diseases, even cancer, those positive stories will help push us through and maintain what, in the case of climate change, will be a many-decades of hard work to change the industrial economy so that there are no emissions and help countries poorer than us that can't afford a premium price. >> trevor: i know i'm going to

run out of time with you, so i wanted to chat with you about another venture bill gates is jumping into and this one is interesting because welcome to the bandwagon, bill, you've launched a podcast! you have a really interesting podcast you are co-hosting with rashida jones. i love this. you've got bill and rashida and you're asking big questions. you do seem so different yet have many similarities. you both went to harvard, i believe, right? the only difference is she actually graduated. >> very impressive. >> trevor: the question i have is do you sometimes feel a little inadequate hosting with rashida when you are a college dropout? >> i feel more inadequate because she's so articulate, she's an artist, and i like to give out lots of numbers, which are boring as he can. >> trevor: i think the word

you're looking for is nerd. >> yeah, i'm the nerd. although, she likes to read, too, but it's a good balance. it was a lot of fun doing it with her. she's not as optimistic about the future as i am. i'm trying to bring her around. you know, whether it's the pandemic or climate change, talking to her about, you know, there is a path. >> trevor: there is a path. it's fun. dr. fauci is your first guest. it's a really fun podcast. it's fun to hear the both of you and the dynamic you have. i hope a lot of people will tune in because it's a different way to listen to the conversations. as for you joining me on the show, thank you for taking the time. thank you for the work you're doing, good luck we've thing including the conspiracy theories and hopefully i'll see you on the other side of the tunnel. >> hopefully in person some day. bye-bye. >> trevor: "bill gates and rashida jones ask big questions" is available at the link below and i've where else you listen to podcasts. we'll take a quick break and trr

show for tonight, everybody, but before we go -- thanksgiving is coming up, but in the corona era, homebound seniors are at greater risk than ever, especially those who don't know where their next meal is coming from. but meals on wheels is out there in the streets, delivering meals to elderly americans every day, to keep them safe and nourished in communities across the country. if you can help out, and want to support the work they do, please donate at the link below. until next time -- stay safe out

there, wear a mask, and remember, the mask will also absorb any hair dye before it drips into your mouth. now, here it is -- your moment of zen. >> it was a very high degree of radiation -- >> all of a sudden all hell broke loose. >> in a storm that's more parallel -- oh! >> guys, if you're from the city, you probably don't know this. i'm going to whisper -- gobble gobble! ( gobbling ) >> there they go. they respond! ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna have myself a time ♪ ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ ♪ going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind ♪ ♪ ample parking day or night ♪

♪ people spouting "howdy neighbor" ♪ ♪ headed on up to south park ♪ ♪ gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ (♪ mumbling) ♪ so come on down to south park ♪ ♪ and meet some friends of mine ♪ - dude, what's your little brother doing here? - ike is starting his first day of kindergarten. - but isn't he only three years old? - yeah, but he's some kind of genius so he's getting advanced placement in kindergarten. - i pooped my pants. - but dude, check out my new trapper keeper. it has five different compartments for each subject in school and it's all covered with pictures from "dawson's creek". - cool! - hey dudes, check out my sweet dawson's creek trapper keeper ultra-keeper futura 2000. yeah, well, it's got 10 different compartments for every subject in school, electronic pencil sharpener, four plastic bags with electronic zippers, copy machine, fax, a better picture of dawson's creek on the back than kyle's. flat screen tv and of course, onstar. - wow, cool. godammit, cartman! you only got that because you knew my mom wouldn't buy it for me! - oh, but you have a trapper keep-- oh, you got the little "crapper keeper", didn't you? well, at least your stupid brother got a briefcase. - he's going to kindergarten because he's a genius. - he's not a genius, he's a little douche bag.