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tv   The Daily Show With Trevor Noah  Comedy Central  February 16, 2021 1:16am-2:01am PST

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the university college london uncovered the remains of an ancient stone circumstance nell wales and supports the theory that the monument was dismantled there and then dragged over 140 miles to will shire england. >> trevor: that i'm sorry but that sin credible. stonehenge was moved 140 miles? how! and also why? what was its difference between a field in wales and a field in england in prehistoric times. no one was like the-- schools are much better there, plus there are so many good restaurants you can walk to. but at least now we finally understand why stonehenge looks so weird. it is because they took the whole thing apart. brought it to england, and then realized they forgot to bring the instructions. i mean without those, you are screwed. >> maybe the stone goes here. why do we have so many screws left over? do you put-- i think they are supposed to be next to each other. either way, i think it is incredible that they were able to move those giant stones.
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but i also feel really bad for whoever they roped into helping them. because back then there were no good excuses to bail on things. >> i would love to help you out moving the stones but i have a cello recite el tomorrow. cellos don't exist yet. yep, you are right, i will see threw to move the stones. let's move on now to the coronavirus pandemic. the reason you got a fake i.d. saying that you are 65. for weeks the big fear has been about the dangerous variants of the virus from the u.k. and south africa. that are now spreading around the globe. but now the united states is getting some mutations of its own. >> this morning growing concerns about variants of the coronavirus. "the new york times" reports doctors have now found seven variants of the virus that originatedded in the u.s. spotlighting the urgent need for better tracking of cases and mutations. >> all of these variants had the same exact mutation. now that could just be a coincidence but some researchers
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are worried that could this mean that the virus is getting smarter and adapting. >> trevor: that's right, people. there are now variants of the coronavirus that were made in the united states. which means these new coronas don't even believe in corona. and what's de pressing to realize is that throughout the pandemic the virus has been getting smarter and smarter while us humans only seem to be getting less brains good gooder-- less brain-- less good brains. let's be honest. this is kind of our fault, people. we as humans let this virus spread so easily that we gave it lots of chances to mutate and evolve. it is like what happened with alternative milks. we let soy milk slide, then almond milk, then oat milk. now we are two months away from a barista asking us if we want fish milk. and yeah, i do want some fish milk, dude. so the pandemic is moving into a new phase but we're still learning a lot about how so many things went wrong up until now.
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and it looks like one person that many of us gave a lot of credited to might have been hiding some things. >> growing fallout for new york governor andrew cuomo and his administration. over withholding covid death toll numbers in nursing homes. the growing scrutiny comes just weeks after new york attorney general leticia james released a report claiming the state had undercounted nursing home deaths by as much as 50%. state health officials acknowledge the death toll was more than 15,000, much higher than originally reported. >> the top cuomo aid admitted with holding data for months over concerns the trump justice department might use the info against them. >> those comebts sparked immediate backlash among lawmakers on both sides of the aisle. state republicans going so far as to say he should be impeached. >> trevor: wow. really, governor cuomo? you lowered your own numbers to make yourself look better? whooo. guess who just got uninvited to my 29th birthday next week.
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and the explanation for this, the explanation that they are going with is that they thought the trump administration would use the high nursing home deaths against them. which yeah, usually if are you not doing a good job, it gets used against you. that is the whole point of data. this would be like if the kansas city chiefs said come on, you're going to look at the scoreboard. isn't it enough that i am telling you that i won the super bowl? come on! and when you think about it, messing with covid numbers to make yourself look better is just about the trumpiest thing that you can do. which is ironic since its main reason cuomo became a pandemic hero is that he was giving informative, coherent press conferences while trump was twrying to get people with bleach. like if you take a bowl of chef boyardee and put it next to a bowl of worms, the fact if is next to something so disgusting makes those worms look really delicious. like look, i don't care what anybody says, for me you cannot justify doing the wrong thing because you say oh, trump might
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have or might not have or-- no, you did the wrong thing. hey, batman, did you kill those innocent people? i had to do it, you should have seen what the joker was going to do to them. like worse then kill them. >> now but. >> let's move on from a governor who might be getting impeached to a president who just beat impeachment, in our final installment, probably, of the magical wonderful road to impeachment. >> that is probably presidential harassment. >> trevor: impeachment. it's the most presidential thing donald trump has ever done. and after a full week of arguments in trump's second senate trial it all came down to this. >> former president donald trump tonight declared not guilty of the impeachment charge he incited insurrection at the capitol on january 6th. >> he is hereby acquitted of the charge in said article.
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>> seven republican senators voting with democrats could to convict, 57-43. the most bipartisan senate impeachment vote in history. but far short of the two thirds majority needed to convict. >> trevor: yes, the bad news for donald trump is that seven members of his own party said that he was guilty. which is unprecedented. the good news for him, is that it wasn't enough. so trump is free to go, baby! 2024, here we come, bam bam bam bam. we getting the whole crew back together. ivanka, jared kushner, mike pence, sorry about trying to get you killed. but that's in the past now, let's do this. and true to his form, trump got acquitted 43-57. this dude just loves losing the popular vote and i get that it is disappointing for a lot of people. but we should know this by now. this is what trump does. he wriggles his way out of accountability. trying to hold trump responsible for his crimes is like trying to kill a fruit fly.
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it's just like ha, got it this time. and you open your hands trk is not even there, it is already halfway across the room sitting on your girlfriend's boob. and this was a tricky situation for republicans. because polls show schmost americans don't like trump, and think he should have been convicted. but the gop base still loves trump, and would turn against anyone who votes against him faster than buffy fans turned on josh whedon. so to make everybody happy, senators came up with really an amazing and bull shit excuse that even if trump was guilty they couldn't do anything about it because he's already out of office. and nobody rolled around in that bullshit more than my man mitch mcconnell. >> there is no question, none, that president trump is practically and morally responsible for provoking the events of the day. we have no power to convict and
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disqualify a former office holder who is now a private citizen. as an ordinary citizen. unless the statute of limitations is run, still liable for everything he did, while is he in office. didn't get away with anything yet. yet. we have a criminal justice system in this country. we have civil litigation. and former presidents are not immune from being accountable by either one. >> trevor: wow. yes, another profile in courage from mitch mcconnell. basically what he is saying is trump caused the riots. trump is superguilty. and mitch just hopes that some day, someone else will do something about it. i mean look, nobody is actually buying this explanation. out of anyone, mitch mcconnell is the one person who always finds a way to get things done if he wants to get it done.
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but this dude is so effect i've has federal judges on the french supreme courts. >> i don't know how he got here but the law is zee law so electric cars are illegal. but now all of a sudden mitch is coming up with excuses just so that he doesn't have to take a stand. and i just have one question, senator mcconnell. how can you even look at yourself. >> i never have, trevor, every time i look in the mirror a choke. >> trevor: oh, okay. but thanks to mitch and 42 other republicans, donald trump managed to beat off the charges against him. and now his friends and family are beating off in general. >> this was a big win for team trump. >> the former president taking a victory lap, not showing any signs of remorse or regret. after yesterday's verdict trump attorney michael van der veen was seen fist bumping another team member saying we're going to the super bowl sas if he this won the superblowl. >> son eric posting this, 2-0.
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>> trevor: now that's what i am talking about. 2 and 0. obama never even won a single impeachment. shit's embarrassing. say what you want, but trump is the acquittal goat, sor isee o.j., you had a good run but trump got acquitted twice and he is responsible for more deaths. and you might think 2-and-0 is as good as it gets but i think trump might have a third impeachment in him. eight months from now congress could be like oh, dammit, we swus found out that trump sold the declaration of independence on ebay. >> i hope someone does something about it, but i vote to acquit. dam it, mitch. but for now, if you are celebrating alongside team trump, and you want to remember this day forever, well here's an offer you won't want to miss. >> it's official. president trump has won his second impeachment trial. on practical grounds. and now you can celebrate with the president with the new trump acquittal collection.
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including the official acquittal t-shirt, the official acquittal blanket an the official acquittal coffee mug. order now and you will get real copies of the trump defenses used trial noteds all purchases come with a baseball bat and flex cuffs for the next time we march on the capitol peacefully. wink wink. let's say sometime this spring, be there, we'll be wild. >> trevor: oh man, i'm getting the hoodie. when we come back, our correspondents tell us what they learned during the pandemic. and neil patrick harris is joining me on the show. so joining me on the show. so don't g
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show. although covid is still a huge danger, the vaccine rollout is giving us all hope that the end of the pandemic is in site. and with that in mind, roy wood, jr. gathered some of the news team to check in on how they spent their pandemic. >> guys, the vaccine is on its way, the pandemic is almost over so let's take stock. i know we've all been locked up for about a year now, how is everybody doing. >> you know, roy, all this extra time at home really hasn't been that bad. i took up crochet and it is actually kind of fun. >> whoa, are you going to make me a scarf. >> yeah, totally, rate after i finish off these mittens. z michael, what have you been up to? >> well, you guys know i always wanted to paint. >> yeah. >> well, this year i took up oil painting. >> wow. oh my god, that's amazing. >> seriously, kosta, those are
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impressive. man, i'm so inspired now. ♪ taught myself how to play piano. bawt this ebay-- sounds good, right. >> boy, that is. >> i love it. >> ♪. >> so what have you been up to all this time? >> nothing. i just basically sat here. >> oh, okay. like meditation. >> yeah. >> no. just like freaking out in silence for nine months. >> okay. well, that's cool, ronnie. michael s that a schooner. >> st. >> oh my god, you really know your sail boats. >> well, i spent a week in june studying wooden ships. >> oh my god. then you are going to love this. it's the u.s.s. constitution. >> oh my god. the only. >> the only wooden ship still in commission by the u.s. navy.
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>> what the hell. what is wrong with you guys? what kind of maniac uses at pok lips for self-improvement. >> guilty as charged. i'm rocking a six pack now. >> oh yeah. >> never felt better. >> i made some changes too, totally redid my diet, got rid of refined sugars, ronnie if you want, i will mail you some of my bread recipes. >> no, i don't want to make goddam bread at home, so may problems they are not going away making some foccacia. >> actually it's-- i also learned italian. one of the biggest knitting community is in tuscanee, shout out to my ladies in the old country. >> grazia. >> oh my god, i love italy. it is the setting for my third novel, about a venetian prince who fell out of favor with the pope but then finds true love with a stable maid called ross aria. >> shut the [bleep] up, who had the energy to do. this i cut my hair once in may and it was a disaster, and that was tment i spent the rest of the time looking at houses on
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glil-- zillow in ran dowm towns in the country. >> any towns you like? >> no. kesel, wyoming. >> oh, yeah, 82601. >> what? >> that is the zip code for castle, wyoming, i memorized the wol country back in april. >> wasn't april a mess. the only thing i managed to do was learn tele kenny sis. -- telle ken is is. >> bow. okay. great. you guys did stuff. show. looks like i wasted my year. >> whoa, whoa, whoa, ronnie, don't be so hard on yourself, okay. >> look, i'm not a psychiatrist, i have another semester before i become one. the most important thing to remember in these times is that the biggest accomplishment you can make is sur-- survival. you've done that, ronnie. so you should be proud, hold your head up high. did you it, man. >> yeah, you're right. i did survive. >> but wait, wait, ronnie, just
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a second. done. >> damn, kosta, that's awesome you look so sad. >> oh, got me feeling you. >> okay, so great talking to you guys. as usual. i'm going to go stare at my ceiling until june. >> bye, ronnie. ♪. >> i'm with youk ronnie, i barely learned any new languages myself. all right, when we come back, neil patrick harris is joining us on the show. so don't go away. >> we have a moral obligation to-- the poor even if it makes our own country poorer and dirtier. >> what is hate speech? >> all cultures are equal except they are not all equal. >> what is a white supremacist. >> i'm like extraordinarily loaded from money i inherited i have never needed to work. >> what precisely is privilege.
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>> our civilization is superior and we need to defend it. >> what exactly is a nationalist. >> our leaders are weak if you let people spray paint obscenities on city hall, pretty soon they are overturning cop cars. weakness invites aggression. >> what say fascist. >> there was no physical evidence that grornlg floyd was murdered by a cop. >> what exactly is this disinformation. >> all right, i got to go. you should stick to the thigh high boots you are better at that. >> is that sexism. >> this play be a lot of things, this moment we are living through but it is definitely not about black lives. and remember that when they come for you. and at this rate they will. >> who exactly is the fear among rel. >> iraq is a crappy placed fill with a bunch of semiliterate primitive monkeys. primitive monkeys. >> who is the racist here. check out this one. long hair, loves to hike and plays frisbee... what is he, a labrador? (laughing) so, should i meet him? you're not that adventurous. yes i am! try me. ok... ...jump into that lake.
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beginning of the aids crisis in the u.k. and working with nicolas cage. >> they've taken him into hospital. >> oh, sorry. >> is he all right? >> possibly nothing. >> they said it was pneumonia. then they said it was like something you get from birds, in his lungs. they said it was strange. they said it was some kind of. >> that's what they said. >> you haven't gone a parrot. >> of course i haven't got a [bleep] parrot. >> neil patrick harris, welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> thank you so much, this is my first time on the show, i'm excited and a little nervous. >> trevor: how can you be nervous. i'm the one, because like neil patrick harris has touched so many of the greatest shows and movies and productions and everything that we know of. i always find myself wondering in a career like yours, do you
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think you had the midas touch or do you just know where midas is and what he is about to touch? >> man, that's so flattering. i-- i like to sort of see if i can live in kevin bacon's wake. and be a few degrees away from the real man who is a few degrees away from everyone. i'm old, mate, i've been around for awhile doing a lot of disparate things socker thankfully i get to keep working in, like, weird ways i never imagined. acting sure, but hosting a ward shows, weird, never part of the plot, writing book, i just do weird stuff, lately so you know, it is what it is. >> trevor: you have historically been one of the most busy people out there. like you said, writing, singing, performing on broadway, aking in movies, tv shows, hosting shows. so what have you been doing at the height of the pandemic. because there was a period where nobody could work. so what were you doing? >> yeah, well, i was working right as the pandemic started.
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i was filming the matrix 4 in san francisco. and that was right when everything started being a little bit cook at the beginning of last year. and then we came home, we were about to head to berlin to film the second half of the movie there. and the lockdown happened. so that got held for awhile. i got covid, my husband, our kids, we all got covid early on. and so we were just hunkered down. we were fine, like medium on a spicy level, we were like a four. and then so then we were-- we had antibodies and we felt fine so we weren't, you know, as nervous as some people around us were. but we just kept to ourselves. i have been working a bit, so it was actually kind of nice. we had finished renovating a place and we were able to move in. and i don't know, i thought, we have ten year old kids, my
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husband and i. and i think it's important to be showing them the positives aspects of this add much as the negatives. this is normal to them. it's a little abnormal but it's not superweird like it is to adults. so we just acknowledged that this is what st and spending time together, in each other's thoughts and trying to break up fights and i really feel like i know my family more than i ever have. and that's chaotic, but it's also kind of fantastic, so i've been blessed. but then i went to berlin, filmed morph that movie. i went to budapest and filled amed a movie with nicolas cage. >> trevor: why do you sound surprised like i went to bud a pis. it sounds like it was a stop over flight and all of a sudden you were in a movie. the way you said it. in a movie with nicolas cage. >> because i had just been in berlin mill aming-- filming a giant movie and i can now sit back and then an email asking if i wanted to go to buda pest,
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hungary and film a nikolas cage mofie, never met the guy, never thought i would be in-- and in the middle of the prand, buda pest is completely locked down it was one of those fly there, for multiple days of quarantine, film for two days and splitment i was there. in this hotel, everything, no restaurants were open, it was strange. just a weird time to be traveling the globe filming things, right now, this last year. but i did t it was a comedy, it was super fun and nikolas cage was as lovely as you would plaj him to be have you met him stz i haven't but also i haven't been to budapest. maybe i go there to buda pest and i will be in a movie with nicolas cage. >> let's talk about your new show that will be premiering on hbo max strks already aired on the other side of the atlantic to really, really, really great reception. and that is a show called it's a
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sin. a beautiful and powerful story, talk to me a little through what this show is about. >> well, it is sort of just two things, it is written and produced by russell t davies and he is prolific. he is years and years, a very english scandal, dr. who, the original-- and then he wanted to do something that was more personal to him. and so he wanted to do a five part sort of larger story about hiv aids and how it came into the u.k. after it had been in the states in the '80s. and no one had really written that story. and so that's kind of the dynamic of it. it's a limited series. it follows these people on the edge of adulthood from various parts of the u.k. that come together in london. and you're watching them all live these exciting lives of possibility and you really like them. and yet you're also watching knowing that this big shadow is
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slowly coming over everyone. and so st very emotional. it's very educational. but not in a really pejorative kind of lecturey way. you want these people to screw each other literally and have fun and dance, you know. an yet you know what's happening, you know what is coming. so it is a really interesting dynamic. i play the mentor to one of the kids, who is living kind of some lovely monogamous old school same-sex couplehood life and as an example to one of the kids in the thing. so pie part is not gigantic but it's been really exciting to be a part of a piece of art that turns into an education in a way that people are responding to legitimately well. my job is actor. i don't feel comfortable in the role of educator.
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i'm not very educated. so when i am able to be a part of something where people can be effective where a generation can live in the world of hiv aids can really have a profound experience reliving things that they had experienced, but more importantly, trevor, to have a younger generation that quite frankly doesn't really know much at all about hiv aids. >> trevor: right, right. >> that really legitimately doesn't know any of this and how it happened and how it came to be. and what it means now. because essentially you can have you know, unprotected sex, catch it, take a pill, you should be fine. like a lot of younger generation, that saul they know from it, so to be able to educate in a way that is still kind of vibrant, that's a really, really nice notch to have on a belt. >> trevor: its a he a beautiful story. and you know, some of the comments i've seen about it, especially from the u.k. have been, many of the feelings i had when just watching the first
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episode was that it's interesting to explore the paradox of the joy that was contained in a world that was overshadowed as you said earlier by this ominous feeling. it feels like that was important to show as well. because sometimes stories tell one side of the story, very sad. or only happy. this seems like it was a complicated reality of what it was. >> that's very well said. and that is what i think is so great about it. because the '80s from that, had that kind of heartbeat to it. and there's lots of scenes of people dancing in nightclubs. and there is a sexiness to it, you know. so you also, you get intoxicated by that. and yet at the same time there's this voice over your shoulder whispering in your ear saying don't forget this is about hiv aced. and it's a very serious topic. and so as you go, your concern for the people and yes obviously
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without spoiling everything, not everyone cur vives because that's sort of part of the storytelling. and then but even in episode one, wondering who all these people with great futures, wondering who is going to mess up and how and what is going to, like who is going to you are survive. it is a very treacherous tight rope of a show. i don't know, i think russell t davies has had extraordinary writing after extraordinary wriegd. he makes content that is really, really vital. and this is no different. >> trevor: yeah, it's really been well-received. in the u.k. and when it repeers-- premiers in the u.s. it will see how people resonate with the story and what they feel about it before i let you go, i would love to know how you worked on your accent because one of the feuds that is constantly, you know, brewing between the u.s. and the u.k. is how people do the other's
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accents. everyone loved your accent. how did you work on it. >> i have a pretty decent ear for accents. but i really didn't want to rely on that. so there was a dialectician i worked with a fair amount. we went through the entire script. we decided what type of person he was. >> trevor: did you do that thing where you live in, were you walking around your house like i would like some tea please. >> no, i went about a week early, to walk around and just kind of sit at pubs and listen to people, so that i miary was in line, the lardest part was when we were filming, my accent, i was fine with my accent as written but then between takes, i wasn't sure we will should maintain the accent or drop it because i didn't want to seem like this weird method actor that is always in character. always speaking with a posh british accent and yet it seemed like it was equally strange to drop it and talk with hard r, the whole time in manchester
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where everyone is talking like this. so i just kind of slipped a difference, i probably talked more like a brit than an american just to make it easier on myself. but no, man, i'm a magazinessive talent crush on the u.k i think the work that they do on television, i think the work they do on film and on stage is-- is really exciting. and really important. and i have always wanted to be a part of something like that. so i was very conciencious about not just yawning and faking my way through an accent. >> trevor: judging you through the reviews they have a crush on you, neil patrick harris, thank you for joining me on the show, congratulations on another fantastic project. and cheers to the next budapest. >> cheer, man, see you soon, i appreciate it. >> trevor: don't forget you can watch all episodes of it's a sin on hbo max starting february 18th. we're going to take a quick break but we'll be right back after this. ur
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smoa for tonight, but before we grk "the daily show" is proud to launch our monochrome collection. a new line of clothing and gear and a hundred pefers its proceeds will be donated to the equal justice initiative. the eji is a great organization
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that works to end mass incarceration, excessive pirnment and racial inequality. if you want to check it out scan the qr code below, or head to daily show.com/collection and you can support eji and look fresh at the same time. that's why we did it. do something good and then you get something good. until tomorrow, stay safe out there, wear a mask and remember, if you are moving stonehenge, lift with your legs, here it is, your moment of zen. >> you need to be where you need to be, buy one today if not earlier than that, i know it is sunday, you want to go to church. today is not the day to go to church. do it virtually because you may get stuck at the church house and if it is val en-- today is valentine's day, if you don't like the person are you with, you pait as well go ahead, leave right now because it ain't going to be good for you because you may not be able to leave until about wednesday.
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- ♪ i'm going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna have myself a time ♪ both: ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ - ♪ i'm going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind ♪ - ♪ ample parking day or night ♪ ♪ people spouting "howdy neighbor" ♪ - ♪ headin' on up to south park ♪ ♪ gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ - ♪ timmy, timmy, timmy, timmy ♪ ♪ timmy, timmy, leh-bah-la timmy ♪ - ♪ come on down to south park ♪ ♪ and meet some friends of mine ♪ - oh, great wizard of gregendath! what quest do you ask of this ranger and paladin? - only one thing can save our kingdom-- you must bring me a piece of pecan pie with toffee ice cream and magic shell. hurry now! - that quest sucks, cartman! think of another one! - uh, boys, butters' parents want to borrow the lord of the rings video we rented. could you take it over to them? - you're sending us on...a quest? you ask of us to take the one video to the house of butters? - yeah, whatever. - it shall be a long journey, with many dangers on the way. - but if the tape must be brought to the house of butters, who else can do it? - very well!
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we shall embark on this quest immediately, father! come, warriors! - ho! - ho! - mmm, that gets rid of them. - ooh, you're a little frisky, aren't you? - yeah, well, uh, the lord of the rings wasn't the only thing i rented from the video store. i also rented... a porno. - ohh, you little devil! - you wanna go watch? - how shall we journey to the house of butters? - through the mines of vandor or over the mountains of gralch? - look out, here comes the great dragon of peringraf! - don't worry, i am the great wizard moltiloch. i can shield us from the dragon's fire! bwwowowoowowo! - good job, wizard. - and so, the party journeyed onward-- the great wizard, the skillful ranger and the covetous jew. - i'm a paladin, cartman! - jews can't be paladins. - hey there, cowboy. - you ready for some hot, steamy fun? - you bet i am. - the guys at the office told me i had to rent this porno. they said this is, without a doubt, the hottest porno ever made. - mmm, sounds good. - i love that lingerie. yeah... you like that?
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- mmm, yeah, baby. - yeah... all right, you ready? - ready. - oh yeah. - the story begins in ages past! in the deep regions of middle earth, where skorn first thrived in the kingdom of gelgala! - oh man, i hate when pornos try to have a story. - seven rings were cast and given to the races of men. - mmm, yeah. - seven to the races of elves, five to the glundock viladers of gelgendol. - wow, the production values are really good in this porno. - yeah, it almost looks like... the lord of the-- oh my god! this is lord of the rings! - but then does that mean-- - the boys have the hottest porno ever made. [knock] - oh, hello, boys. - my father has asked that we bring you this copy of lord of the rings! - well, thank you very much, kind heroes. - perhaps a reward is in order? gold? frankenstein sense? - oh, but you are noble heroes-- we know our thanks is enough. - man, that's crap.
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- butters, look what we have for you to watch-- the lord of the rings! - oh, boy, finally i get to see it! - now, daddy and i have to do our taxes, so can you watch this by yourself and not get scared? - i won't get scared, mom, promise! - that's our man. here you go. - ooh da lolly! i finally get to see lord of the rings! [woman moaning] - spank that ass. - ooh... neat-o! this is good! - oh, my god, this is gonna be so embarrassing. "hi, chris! hi, linda! we were just wondering if we could get our porno back?" - calm down, maybe the boys haven't gotten there yet. - and so the party returns home after completing their great quest. - the one tape was returned, and south park was again at peace. - quick, a monster of rivendel! - prepare for battle! - the boys! - boys! boys! where's the videotape?

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