hey, connie. jerry around? no. and i prefer conrad. so i heard what happened to the desk. i tell you, there was something so reassuring about that cozy little space. yeah, well, whatever. see you. ahh. back to normal.

not bad for 4000 bucks. can't believe i got the low-fat. >> announcer: coming to you from new york city, the only city in america, it's "the daily show." tonight: will trump tweet again? the latest in streaming. and burna boy! this is "the daily show," with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause )

>> trevor: what's going on, everybody? welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much for tuning in. thank you for coming out. oh, yeah! ( applause ) i love it. you guys feel great. take a seat. you guys are fun. we have a hot show for you tonight. our guest is an international superstar, the grammy winning rapper and singer straight out of nigeria. burna boy is joining us on the show. plus, roy wood jr. is going to bring us the traffic. and you will get an exclusive first look at the future of "the daily show." oh, man, i'm excited. so let's do this, people. let's jump straight into today's headlines. ( cheers and applause ). okay, let's kick things off with all of the continuing saga of twitter and elon musk. yesterday, the tesla c.e.o. and man who has definitely made love

to a robot, ( laughter ) officially purchased twitter, setting off a wave of takes so hot, they burned off my eyebrows and i had to draw them back on. everyone went crazy! twitter is over! twitter is back. one of the biggest takes came from former twitter c.e.o. jack dorsey who gave musk his stamp of approval saying, "i trust his mission to extend the lights of consciousness." ( laughter ) and i'll be honest, people, i have no idea what that means. ( laughter ) yeah. but jack's clearly on that billionaire speak, yeah. no, i feel like after you reach a certain net worth, you just start talking like a stoned jedi, you know. like, "what do i want for lunch? my hunger cannot be satiated, for i crave justice. the. ( laughter ) so, turkey sandwich? yeah? turkey sandwich? all jokes aside, jack dorsey is a great guy, and i wish him a safe journey back to his home planet. but not everyone is as chill. a lot of twitter users flat out

said they're going to leave the site. that's how much they hate the idea of elon musk owning it, to which elon replied, "i hope even my worst critics remain on twitter because that is what free speech means." it's really beautiful. and i hope that me means that. i really do. don't forget, this is a guy who once personally canceled a blogger's tesla order because of something they wrote about him. so i'm just saying... yeah, you know. he has nice intentions, but when you have the power to be peto an epic scale, the temptation to do it can be really hard to exist. i don't even blame him. like, fibought google, fibought google, you best believe i would abuse those auto-fills. especially around emmy voting season pup would be like john elver. i would be like children's wig collector. stephen colbert? hit and run? trevor noah? saves puppies. eeh! how did that happen! ( applause ) me? no, oh, guys, no. i just...

yeah. i just had to because stephen colbert hit the owner and i had to, you know, just one of those things. but, of course, the person everyone was waiting to hear from was the former king of twitter, who would still be the king if the throne hadn't been stolen from him. i'm tal talking about donald jei trump. after getting kicked off the twitter, trump started his own service called truth social. everyone wants to know if trump will come back, and yesterday the tangerine responded. >> someone not on twitter, donald trump. a little over a year ago, the former president was banned from the site, but even with new ownership, trump told fox news he will not rejoin and instead stick with his own social media platform. i am not going to twitter. i'm going to stay on truth. i hope elon buys twitter, because he will make improvements to it, and he's a good man, but i am going to be staying on truth. >> president trump this weekend,

saturday night at his rally, touting his social media platform, truth social, and its plans to take on big tech censorship. >> because of this digital tyranny, we had to give the american people their voice back by building something called troth senchal-- truth social. ( laughter ) >> trevor: oh, man! oh, man. does this guy just call truth social troth senchal? what is that? you had one job, one job, it's jur social media platform and you messed up the name. it's almost like every time trump speaks his own mouth stages an insurrection. that's what happens inside there. trump insists he is not going back to twitter. he is going to stick with troth senchal. which is so far a bust. twitter, the thing that it's supposed to be replacing, has 217 million daily users. yeah.

so truth social is competition for twitter the same way that guy on the plane was competition for mike tyson. ( laughter ) ( applause ) also, it doesn't body well that trump himself has only posted on truth social one time, ever. yeah, and that was two months ago. think about how crazy that is. people, when he was on twitter, trump would send out, what, like 50 tweets every time he went to the bathroom. now he hasn't posted for two months. somebody needs to get this guy prune juice fast. apparently a lot of republicans are secretly thrilled if trump would never come back to twitter, yeah, because they don't like the drama that he would create. it makes sense. do you remember what it was like when he was on twitter? he would say something, he'd tweet something random like, "congress should make it illegal to speak spanish." and all day reporters would be tracking down republican senators in the hallway. remember they would chase them, "do you agree with the president that it should be illegal to

speak spanish in? and the senators would have to come up with a new way to answer without answering opinion the press conferences they had to evade the questions without angering trump. they were in the hallways, inundated, "did i see what the president tweeted? well, i have seen twitter as a company, and i have seen the president as well. and i would love to comment on this particular tweet, but i'm about to eat this shrimp, which will give me a severe, allergic reaction. sorry, i can't talk. i'm dying. i'm dying. throat close of closing up. thank you very much. no more comments." i'll be honest, though, the only reason i would want trump back on twitter, the only reason, yes, i know it would lead to another term and it would destroy the country, but i just want to see his wordle scores. ( cheers and applause ). just to see him... see him every day being like, "how could troth senchal not be a word? i use it all the time."

moving on, let's talk about youth sports. it's how we teach young children to feel inferior from as young an age as possible. ( laughter ) there are a few components to youth sports. all right, you need the coaches, you need the equipment. you need a mcdonald's nearby for afterwards so you can immediately undo their exercise and you need the jersey to be sponsored by a local business, like joey's dildo emporium. and maybe the most important part is a referee, which is starting to become a problem. >> next, the bad behavior leading to a shortage of umpires and referees. >> it's kind of sad here. youth sports leagues are having a hard time finding people to officiate games. they say one reason, the disrespect not from kids but from parents and coaches. there's been a dramatic drop in refs across youth sports in all age groups nationwide. based on early data, an estimated 30,000 high school referees have quit since 2018

>> one of the reasons was abuse, abuse and mistreatment by parents and players. >> mistreatment like this: a massachusetts referee punched on the ice by a youth hockey coach, and this unsuspecting referee plowed down on a california soccer field. >> trevor: goddamn, flag on the play. you see how wild the parents are. what are they selling at the concession stand, meth? what are you doing? i don't blame the referees one bit for wanting no part of it. of course they're going to quit. it's completely unacceptable for parents to do that during their kids' game. think about it, what lesson are you teaching your children, that if a ref makes a bad call, it's okay for a parent to storm the field? no. kids need to learn to kick the ref's ass themselves. yeah, you teach them self-reliance. come on, guys. to me this feels like a wider trend in society. i don't know if you have noticed, people feel like they're getting angrier.

instead of a covid test i feel the government should be sending every edibles. that way when parents run on the field they would be like, "hey, ref, have you noticed it's called a touchdown, but you don't have to touch it down, man? dude, it's like what? bro." ( applause ) all right, let's move on to a story about the housing market. ever since the pandemic started, housing prices have been going through the roof. and even with the hole in the room, people are like it's fine, we'll take it, we'll take it. if you really want to know how high the demand is, look at this listing. >> a house in fairfax, virginia, just sold for more than $800,000, and that comes with a stranger living in the basement. the listing agent told "the new york post" someone who had offered to clean the home years ago now lives in the basement without paying rent, and the seller is an elderly man in the hospital. his family can't afford to go through the eviction process. the agent says they received five cash offers in less than

one week. >> trevor: what? did they say a stranger in the basement? ( laughter ) so people are so desperate to get a house, they're even willing to be in the reboot of "parasite." this is what we're doing now. no, for real, no, for are real. ( applause ) i'm pretty certain this is the first time that zillow has a zestimate for how long until the squatter murders you? ( laughter ) i will say this, though, props to the squatter. no, because this is someone who knows commitment. they refuse to leave, to the point that the real estate agent had to include them in the tour. you understand how wild that is? you've got a realtor walking through the house like, "as you can see, we've got three baths, two beds, one creep and a washer dryer, very nice." "i'm sorry, could you go back?" "the two beds? i know, right."

knowing real estate agents what i probably made 2 sound like a feature. in the basement you'll find an unsolicited in-home companion. very in right now. everyone wants one, everyone. but, yeah, that's how crazy this housing market is right now. think about it. that's what's happening in virginia, by the way, virginia. yeah. new york is on another level. you want to see real crazy, come to new york. year, here you pay $5,000 a month and you still have to share a futon with the clown from "it." ( laughter ) do you think maybe you could close your eyes. just it's a little bit-- you know what? never mind. that's fine. they say you should wash your makeup before you sleep. you know, it's... anyway, good night. ( laughter ) ( applause ) and finally-- ( applause ) finally -- that movie is going

strayed to d.v.d. very popular, very popular. if you have ever tried to get work done in the coffee shop, you know it's not easy to stay focused. there are always people coming in and out. you have to ignore the distracting conversations people are having. and you have to pretend you didn't burn the shit out of your mouth like a loser who never drank coffee before. in japan, there's a new kind of cafe that will help you stay on track. >> well, writers under deadline go to tokyo's manuscript writing cafe with an understanding they can't leave until their work is done. >> okay, and there's some prodding thrown in to make sure that they buckle down and finish. customers, when they walk in, write down their names, writing goals, and the amount of time they need to finish. then the cafe staff holds them accountable with three levels of progress checks: mild, normal and hard. customers who choose "mild" only get a verbal confirmation when they pay. those who choose "normal" get a progress check every hour. and for those that decide to go "hard" on themselves, they will feel silent pressure from staff who will stand frequently behind

them. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> trevor: "silent pressure?" what is that? that has to be the most japanese thing i've ever heard. coffee shops where they shame you into being-- yo, coffee shops are not about being efficient. they're about spending the hour trying to figure out the difference between a scone and a biscuit. that's what it is. the difference is you can charge twice for a scone. but this attitude is why people in japan are so stressed out, man. constant pressure to be perfect. they don't need efficiency coffee shops in japan. they need black barber shops. that's what they need. yeah, people in japan are stressed. if they had black barbie shops you wouldn't have that. you have a space where you can chill, spend time talking about topics that don't matter. guys, "are you kidding me? godzilla wouldn't be shit! don't play around with me, baby. oh, shit, i got that wrong, man. just wear a hat." i'm not sure the japanese

approach of judging someone silently will work, especially not in america. here they should make it that if you don't finish your screenplay, one of those hockey parents shows up and beats the shit out of you. here's the issue with the story-- this japanese coffee shop say they will help anyone become more efficient, but they don't want to know what you're working on? i feel like that could backfire badly. just like, "you have finished your work?" "yes, my man fechto has been completed in record time." "what, now?" "yeah, let's do it." ( laughter ) all right, that's it for the headlines. but before we go, let's check in on traffic with our very own roy wood jr., everybody! ( cheers and applause ) >> what's going on, man? >> trevor: what's going on? >> you know, it's good. >> trevor: good to see you. >> you know. ( applause ) progress is in process, but i'm out here like a pigeon at the bakery trying to get my bread out, i'm good. >> trevor: i don't know what

that means, but thank you, roy. >> real quick, before that, the thing with the coaching and the parents attacking the referees and all of that, the issue is that if you want your kid-- like, the problem is the parent being there at the game. you want your kid to be good. that's why you're behaving that way. but we all know that the secret to your child being good at sports is to not be in their life. ( laughter ) just... don't be present. ( laughter ) >> trevor: roy, that's neglect. >> no, that is... that is called preparation. it's called preparation to make your child better. trevor, i don't want to get into the statistics, but the fewer parents you have in your life, the better you are at that sport. everybody knows that. >> trevor: what? >> bro, i was great at baseball. i was great at baseball. second grade my mama came came home and told me her and my daddy were getting back together. i said i'm not going to be good at baseball if y'all are going to be in my life. you have to remove one of them.

neglect is the real mass. m.v.p. like my child. i love my child. we're both in his life. he ain't going to be good at baseball. he plays chess, the piano, he can speak another language. he is doomed. he can't get a jump shot doing all that. you can't do, that man. and also with the whole japanese thing, with the cafe. >> trevor: yeah, the coffee shop. >> you can't-- like, if you want people to be efficient, you can't make them comfortable. that's part of the problem. you ever been in a cafe? it's free wifi, music, jazz music playing. they have the nice seats with the cushions. you don't want to get nothing-- you ever dine in at a fast-food spot? >> trevor: what do you mean a fat-food spot? >> like a popeyes. you ever seen anybody getting work done at a fast food spot. >> trevor: wait, you can sit down at a popeyes? >> i wouldn't recommend it. you can. you should probably get it to go. but like most of these places, a

fast-food spot is built to keep you from procrastinating. the chair is bolted to the floor. ain't no cushion. you can't even recline in the thing. so you're ready to get up out the door. the fewer seats-- like, you can get coffee at a gas station, right. >> trevor: year, you can. >> is there a chair at the gas station? >> trevor: no. >> no, there's not because they want you to get your ass back out there and get to work. if you have a chair, you procastinate. why do you think they have that squatter in virginia. because they have chairs in that house. if he had no chairs at that house-- ( applause ). >> trevor: i didn't think about that. >> a squatter ain't nothing but a professional procrastinator. you got a chair, why do you think that happened? >> trevor: if they didn't have ia chair in the house, you don't think that person would be there? >> absolutely not. i'm an expert, man. let's get to the roads. let me ask you a question about this. >> trevor: yeah. >> why do i always have to do the traffic? ( laughter ) why-- because it's always bad. it's always this shit. and then people are associate that, and then you put my name to it, "roy with the traffic,

roy with the traffic." and they associate me with that where it should be, "roy with the traffic brought to you by trevor noah." >> trevor: but it's not a bad thing. nobody is hating you because of the traffic. >> you don't see the tweets i get on a regular basis about this traffic. i don't appreciate that. speaking of which, why don't i have a chair? ( laughter ) ( applause ) ( cheers and applause ). >> why can't... >> trevor: well, because i want to inspire you to keep things moving. ( laughter ). >> well, let me help you out then. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> trevor: oh, wow. thank you so much for that. roy wood jr. all right, when we come back, we'll introduce you to a new streaming platform that should not exist. you don't want to miss it. what-- what are you doing? what-- what are you doing? ( applause )

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and of course, puppy-friendly. we don't like to say perfect, but it's pretty perfect. booking.com, booking.yeah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is grammy award- winning global superstar burna boy. he's here to talk about becoming the first nigerian artist to play madison square garden. please welcome burna boy. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: the man, the myth, the legend. >> i don't know about all that. ( laughter ). >> trevor: how you doing, my friend? it's been a long time, man. >> yeah. >> trevor: yeah, you've been conquering the world. the last time we spoke we were just talking about how amazing your album was going, "african

giant." people were loving it. it was blowing up all over the globe. i was talking about the grammy, your future aspirations. then the pandemic hit. you produced an album in that pandemic and you went on to win your first grammy. congratulations, brother. congratulations. ( applause ) that's-- so let's start with that. i was shocked to find out that you produced the album, like, on zoom. i mean, you've got some of the biggest features, you have everybody from chris martin. you did this on zoom? >> yeah. >> trevor: how do you know it's going well on zoom? >> you don't. >> trevor: oh, okay. >>y hope for the best. >> trevor: was there ever a moment where you were recording something on zoom, it sounded great, then you got it, and you were like, no, it doesn't sound-- >> it's not like you record the song on zoom. it's not like zoom has a recording studio. >> trevor: burner, i don't know how zoom works. >> you have the laptop on in the studio with all the parties involved. and while we're making the music

and stuff, and then, you know, everyone is like, okay, this is the song we have to choose. we have to choose this. you know, and then-- yeah. it just worked out. ( laughter ) >> trevor: i want to ask you about the artist, though. you know, one thing i've truly loved is how, like, nigerian artists have taken africa to the world. man, you've blown up the continent. everyone is now trying to emulate what nigerian artists are creating. >> except our government. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> trevor: are there artists that you dreamed of working with that you were shocked to be working with when you were working with them? >> everyone on my last album, and the previous, one. these are people i watched on tv when i was in pampers. ( laughter ) you know, like, seeing them in real life and actually making music with them.

you know, getting the love and all that. >> trevor: right. >> sometimes it gets kind of weird because i'm like, it's like, my mom loves you." ( laughter ) >> trevor: your mom, a lot of people may not know this, but your mom is your manager. >> yeah. >> trevor: yeah, momma burner, crushes is, by the way. i love her. ( applause ) but here's what i've always wondered, and it seems different. you know, in america, there's a culture of they call them the mommages, and the idea if your parent is your manager everything goes wrong. >> an american manager. >> trevor: there's not a part of you that was worried about having your mom be your manager? >> no, it's like-- it's-- obviously, it's not all peaches and roses. >> trevor: yeah. >> a lot of food ( laughter ) so, i mean, that makes me happy.

>> trevor: you're the artist. your mom is the manager. technically, that's a power balance that has shifted over. but now she's your mom and she's an african mom, which means the power balance never shifts over. >> exactly. >> trevor: are there moments your mom goes, "no, this is how we're doing it, and that's how we do it." >> you know what she does now, she used to do that, and that wouldn't work out for her because, you know, like... >> trevor: you just get stoic. i'm not moving. >> exactly. so she figured out some other way. she would make me feel like it's my decision. ( applause ) >> trevor: momma burner! you got your family with you. you tour with them. you're traveling around the world. can i say congratulations on everything. selling out the o2 arena in london. selling owpts the forum in hollywood. now the first nigerian artist to ever sell out madison square garden. ( cheers and applause ). and to play it as well.

>> you know one thing i always wondered, like, why-- how come when it's me, they always point out the fact that i'm the first to do it? like the first ( bleep ) that landed on the moon. it's like, why when rock bands perform in tokyo and stuff, they don't say, "the first american rock band to perform in tokyo." >> trevor: i think because they're surprised. there is an element of surprise, you know. >> why? >> trevor: because we've come a long way. do you know how far madison square garden is from africa? >> but do you know how far away tokyo is for kids -- >> but, you see, that's the thing, if you think about it,s culture has, for such a long time, been defined by america. so it makes sense in a way for people to go, of course the music will go there. you know what i mean? but now, think about it. >> move on. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> trevor: but think about it, right? for-- for the world to change the way it has, i mean, you see

beyonce incorporating your music into her vibe. do you get what i'm saying? these are big things that never happened. >> i would incorporate her music into my vibe. ( laughter ). >> trevor: i love speaking to you, every time i see the biggest difference between nigerians and almost every other african. every other african has very-- what's the word i'm looking for-- a very timid approach to life. if you say to ia south african, "hey, trevor, you're doing well. how are things going?" as a south african my instinct is to respond, "i'm trying, man. i'm doing okay. i'm trying." >> you're trying. >> trevor: see what i mean about nigerians. this is what i mean. you go to kenya. everything,. >> we don't lie unless we want to scam you. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> trevor: this is nigerians.

i never met a nigerian who will be like, i'm not killing if if they won't be killing it. >> if you're in court, you're about to go to jail, you should lie. ( laughter ). >> trevor: but if you're killing it. >> if you're killing it,s like, you should be happy. ( laughter ). >> trevor: let's talk about the new album. i've noticed you teased a few snippets from it, but you're doing thing-- >> before you talk about that, this is the second time i come here. you never offer me no drink. >> trevor: don't believe the man here. >> chocolates and tea and like i'm bugs bunny or teddy... i need a drink, man. >> trevor: what do you want me to offer you? >> things that people that look like me would... let me take these glasses off. ( cheers and applause ). so, i'm answering real questions. i need a drink. >> trevor: i can always get you a drink.

the only thing i have to remember is switch out the things that happened. because i'll get you the drink, and then i'll leave the drinks there, and then you find, like, kamala harris comes to the show next day, and back stage she'll be like... what is your drink of choice? i'll make sure i get it for you next time. >> man, i don't want to promote someone right now. >> trevor: so water is not for burner? >> water is definitely for me. but when i'm dressed like this... ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: make sure-- make sure we get burner-- what else would you like? what else would you like backstage? >> i mean, i already got some weed so i'm good. ( applause ). >> trevor: this is what i love about-- all right, now can we talk about the album? >> yeah, yeah, for sure. >> trevor: now that you've called me out for not offering you stiff drinks. >> very rude. >> trevor: i love the "and

chocolates! you offer me chock lapts." >> with pretzels. what is a pretzel? ( laughter ) >> trevor: oh, man. you've teased the album, but you've condition that thing artists do when we don't know when it's coming, who's going to be-- i saw a snippet of you in the studio. i saw ed sheeran and people lost their minds. ed sheeran looks like he's going to be on the album, but■ you won't tell-- when is the album coming out, burner? >> uhhh... ( laughter ) ( applause ). >> trevor: oh, okay, okay. oh. so now the nigerian doesn't want to tell the truth. okay. >> i didn't say anything. >> trevor: oh, okay. >> so i didn't lie. >> trevor: silence, all right. >> because you're my guy, you know, i won't let you down. in front of all these people. ( laughter ) okay, so, it's-- i'll give you a

hint. it's going to come out on the day everyone celebrate for their self when it's their own date. >> trevor: all right. i don't know what that means, but... >> you see. ( laughter ). >> trevor: i can-- i can feel it. >> trevor: you just left me with a riddle that i've got to go and figure out. i'm like, "is it a friday? is it a birthday? is it a sunday? a saturday? it depends on the day you celebrate what you do." >> not what you do, it's not everybody in the world that has a job. so it's like-- this, everybody has it. everybody has their day to celebrate it. >> trevor: we're going to figure this out, man. burna boy, everybody. thank you so much for joining me on the show. good to have you. i'll have a drink next time. >> most definitely. >> trevor: catch burna boy at

madison square garden for "one night in space" on april 28th. okay, we're gonna take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. ( cheers and applause )

( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: that's our show for tonight. but before we go: nearly 4,000 homes have been destroyed and more than 40,000 people displaced by the floods and

mudslides in my home country south africa. "gift of the givers" is a south african-based disaster relief organization on the ground helping those affected by the floods. if you can help them in their work in any way, donate at the link below. until then, stay safe out there. and stop beating up the refs at your kids' games. just bribe them and everybody wins. now here it is, your moment of zen. >> it's a boy! but the dad-to-be is so excited at his baseball-themed gender reveal, he runs right over to his buddies. he carries on with the bros, while she's pushed aside. hey, what about me! ♪ i'm goin' down to south park, gonna have myself a time ♪ ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ ♪ goin' down to south park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪ ♪ ample parking day or night

♪ people spouting, "howdy, neighbor!" ♪ ♪ heading on up to south park, gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ ♪ mrph rmhmhm rm! mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪ ♪ come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine ♪