you got a cotton ball and tape and we've been using band-aids. >> i, uh--oh, i feel so woozy. i just-- [mutters] it's band-aids. >> ah, damn. >> announcer: coming to you from new york city, the only city in america, it's "the daily show." tonight: trump's big beautiful wall is back. health music history. and pete buttigieg. this is "the daily show," with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: what's going on everybody! welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much for tuning in, and thank you for

coming out in person. thank you so much. take a seat. we've got a great show for you tonight. joe biden is building the wall, we learn where beyonce got her groove, and donald trump has found a spooky way to avoid paying taxes. plus the secretary of transportation pete buttigieg himself is joining us on the show tonight which means i'm getting a bunch of my parking tickets canceled! let's do this people. let's go straight into today's headlines. ( applause ) all right! let's do. let's do. before we get into the big stories, let's catch up on a few other things that are going on. first of all, congratulations to someone out there for winning $1.3 billion. in the mega millions lotto. did you boo or ooh. i don't know what that sound was. it's the biggest lottery payout ever to a single winner. and it's wild to me that we just gave $1 billion to someone who has proven they're bad with

money. why are you playing the lottery! it's a terrible investment, unless you win. ( applause ) now, because illinois has a law allowing lottery winners to remain anonymous, we might never know who won this money. i will say this-- if your next-door neighbor comes to a cookout in a private jet, it's probably them, or kylie jenner. meanwhile, in shocking entertainment news, beyonce isn't perfect. yeah, this is the part with the tomatoes hit me, i know. i know. this morning, queenie bey said she would remove the word spaz from one of her songs because she didn't realize it was ableist. if you're having deja vu, this comes a few weeks after lizzo came out and had to do the same thing,icate word from the song. which, honestly, must be so exciting for lizzo. she's probably like, "oh, my god! beyonce sampled my scandal." which is amazing.

( applause ) and there's another pop star in trouble. this is a crazy story. shakira could be facing eight years in prison for tax fraud. yeah. the spanish government says that she dodged $17 million in taxes by pretending to live in the bahamas. when her real residence was in barcelona. bahamas, barcelona. so, yeah, it turns out you cannot claim your residence as whenever, wherever. that doesn't work. it's a good lesson for everybody here. ( applause ) and in labor news, in labor news-- this is one of the weirdest stories ever-- a chick-fil-a in north carolina igot into trouble for asking for volunteers to work the drive-through window. and the reason it was volunteers, because instead of paying the workers, the restaurant said it would give them five free meals for every one-hour shift. yeah. and i will say, it really does show you how good chick-fil-a

is. because all of you paused for a second when i said that, before getting angrier you're like, "wait, would i-- no, no! does it include the wharf fell fries? no, no! boo! that's what's going on. a bunch of random things. let's move on to some of the bigger news stories of the day, starting with an update on joe biden, the president whose approval rating is going through its own recession. as you all know, the president had covid, and then recovered from it last week. but then, after testing negative, the white house doctor is reporting that biden is now testing positive again with what they call "a rebound infection." it's definitely not the rebound biden was hoping for. "come on, jack, rebound, you know what i mean." ( applause ) so, anyway, the president is back in isolation again. but the white house says, don't worry. he's feeling fine and he will be working the entire time. although, many of his supporters might not love his new project.

>> president biden says work can resume on former president trump's border wall. the white house wants four gaps in the fence to be filled in near yuma, arizona. we're told it's one of the busiest crossings for undocumented immigrants. >> it's another reversal of policy for the president who vowed not to add to his predecessor's efforts in any way on that project. >> there will not be another foot of wall constructed in my administration. >> trevor: that's right. there will be many feet of wall, ha-ha. gotcha! 2024. but, yes, it looks like joe biden is completing donald trump's unfinished business ( audience booing ) if i was mike pence right now, i'd be nervous as hell. ( applause ) i'd be watching out. ( cheering ) you know-- you know what i also love, what i love about this story is how fox doesn't know what to do with these kind of stories. right. because they want the wall, but they also hate joe biden. you know, they're like, "did you

see what biden is doing? he was against the wall, but now he's building it. i guess we have to vote for him? how does this work?" you do have to admit it is confusing. biden, he spent what, four years railing against the wall. "this wall is fascist and racist and un-american, and now we're going to have. patched up in no time, folks. we're going to fix up this wall." the reason, the reason the biden administration gave for building trump's wall these sections of arizona is because they're saying it's dangerous for migrants to cross the river there. so they want to put up a wall to stop the people from crossing. which you have admit is a little weird because now, they're saying that walls do stop people from crossing. yeah. but they're only doing it here because they want to make it safer because the river is super dangerous. so they don't want people to try to cross here, other parts, i guess. ( laughter ) although if you really wanted to

make crossing a river safer, but why wouldn't you build a bridge instead of adding a wall? none of it makes sense. none of it makes sense. ( cheers and applause ). you know why? you know why? because it's bullshit, that's why. ( laughter ) yeah. this doesn't make sense. look, i can't say it for certain, but it seems like the only reason they're building a wall in these sections is because these sections could affect democratic senator mark kelly, who is running for reelection in arizona. and he's been pushing for these sections to be filled. when you see it through that lens, it makes a lot more sense. migrants sneaking into arizona? that's whatever. but republicans sneaking into the senate, you've got to shut that shit down! ( applause ) and either way-- either way-- i hope this is one of those things that can bring america together. you know, this is one of those moments where people can unite, because when you think about it, trump and biden have more in common than we think. they both want the wall filled

in. they both have shady sons. and they both have close scpan companions who require rabies shot. it's a beautiful thing to see. biden and trump. ( applause ) oh! speak of trump. the tr tanj reap dream is back n the news. remember how his wife, ivana, passed away, really sad story. passed away. it turns out donald may have managed to turn even that into a scam. >> ivana trump, the first wife of president trump has been in , near the first hole at president trump's golf club in bedminster, new jersey. the reason is unclear, but according to "insider," operating a cemetery on the golf course will allow president trump to avoid paying taxes on the land. >> trevor: wow. wow, wow, wow, wow!

a lot of people say "i'll pay tax overs my dead body." trump means it. ( laughter ) someone else's body. and even for him, this feels like a step too far. i don't care what anyone says. i wouldn't even laugh at that as a joke. is someone said, "donald trump's ex-wife died. he'll probably bury her on his golf course to save taxes." i would say, "that's not cool. that's not cool." trump was like, "say more, say more. i'm going to send this to my accountant. keep going." what this really shows you is how strange the tax system can be. like, all this tax break does is incentivize you to be a weirdo. who came up with this? it feels like the law was written by a serial killer. "there should be a law if you bury a body in your law you don't have to pay taxes anywhere."

"the senator whose interns keep disappearing makes a motion. good point, good point." that's ridiculous. it's time to check on the weather forecast with our very own desi lydic, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) what's happening. the weather has calmed a bit? what's the weather looking like? >> oh, man, it is all blue skies and sunshine for whoever won the $1.3 billion jackpot. i'll tell you that. i wonder who... i wonder who she is. ( laughter ) i mean, it could be any of us, any of us in this room right now. one might even wonder why she came to work today. ( laughter ) >> trevor: wait, are you-- are you saying you won the lottery? >> look, i'm saying the winner has chosen to be anonymous. you know, in many ways they're building a wall between them and us knowing, but whoever she sshe

probably has enough money to buy her boss a new car. >> trevor: wait, wait-- wait, so you did win? ( applause ) you won the lottery? is that what you're saying? >> i don't know. i don't know. did i, trevor by the way, that ivana story is so crazy, being laid to rest on his golf course. i feel for all of trump's wives. even in the afterlife they still have to deal with his balls coming at them. ( cheers and applause ). for the love of god! let her rest! also, i will say tax moves like this are very, very common among the ultrawealthy, something i've been reading up on recently, for no particular reason. i bought an island. so anyway... ( laughter ). >> trevor: so you're saying you did win the lottery. what's going on? did you win or not? >> no, trevor, that's ridiculous. although i will say i'm feeling very generous tonight, which is

why i have a special announcement for the audience. nench this audience, i am sending wall of your kids to college. ( cheers and applause ). yes. all of them. all of them. even the underachievers. all of them. i'm talking room, board, ipads, the good drugs-- all of it. ( applause ) because-- and maybe you saw this coming-- i'm just going to go ahead and say it, i have the winning ticket. here it is right here. can we get a closeup? that is it! >> trevor: no, no. >> boom! ( applause ) bam! >> trevor: don't cheer for that. desi, that's not a real ticket. >> that is it. that is the real ticket, trevor. it is absolutely 100% real. you can tell because it says, "not fake." it is definitely real, and not going to blow this for me. back me up. >> trevor: i'm not blowing anything.

the winner is someone in illinois. >> someone has to come forward. no one has come forward yet, so there's a window of opportunity. look, i can cut you in on this if you just act cool. >> trevor: it's not about act ago i'm not in. no one is going to be fooled by that. >> really? you're going thood to? you're going to do this to them, their children? guess what, audience. none of your kid are going to college. yeah, none of them ( audience booing ) because of this man right here. >> trevor: no! >> this man-- don't be fooled by these dimples. he does not believe in dreams. he's a dream crusher. >> trevor: that makes no sense, you're the one who promised the thing-- >> by the way, trevor, you are not invited to my island. >> trevor: desi, you didn't buy an island. >> i did. it's amazing what you can buy with a credit card. ( bleep ). i'm in so much debt. i have to see if chick-fil-a is

still hierlg volunteers. >> trevor: desi lydic, everybody. don't go away. roy wood jr. will tell us where drake and beyonce got all of their ideas. we'll be right back.

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fix your photos with magic eraser photograph all skin tones accurately with real tone and last up to 72 hours with extreme battery saver it's all you want in a phone. google pixel 6a switch it up, and get the all new google pixel 6a. flo, you're here. this pipe just burst on me. well, you bundled home and auto with progressive, so you have round-the-clock protection on all your stuff. like that cardboard tv. i told props to switch that out. okay, everyone, that's a wrap. [ bell rings ] wait, you faked this whole thing? i knew it was the quickest way to see you. i'm sorry, jon, but i'm already in love with insurance. you know that's weird, right? well, any weirder than faking a burst pipe? got a little carried away. yeah. ( cheers and applause )

>> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." you know, black history doesn't just have to be for february. it can be for normal-sized months, too. so let's go to roy wood jr. for another episode of "c.p. time." ♪ ♪ ♪ >> hello. welcome to "c.p. time." the only show that's for the culture. today, we'll be discussing house music. when i say "house music" i'm not talking about all those weird sounds that you hear in your home it's floor creek, the radiator playing a beat at 3:00 in the morning or when your washing machine beeps like crazy to let you know it's done with the load. that's right, ladies. daddy's got clean boxes on deck. i'm talking about the genre of fast-maced dance music that's keps the molly industry alive

for 40 years. that's the stuff. the music is rolling because you are, too. house music is all the rage these days. from drake and beyonce, to swedish house mafia, to mickey mousy's cokehead cousin who lives in the bad part of epcot. but would you believe this genre has its origins in the black community? of course you should. it's "c.p. time." you never heard me say, "surprise! it's caucasians!" so, yes, these modern ayersts stand on the shoulders of house music's black and gay founders so let's talk about some of them, like francis nichols -- a.k.a. frankie knuckles. he started as a d.j. in new york at a time of ferocious backlash against disco music. it was so bad, in 19 sphierng a crowd gathered at chicago's comiskey park to burn the records of artists in what was known as "disco demolition night." even watching the footage today, it's still a shocking sight...

a full baseball stadium. by the way, here's a tip: if you're ever at a mass burning, you're probably on the wrong side. no one has ever said, "well, that mass burning was a success. now all the orphans are safe." anyway, disco was dead, but people still wanted to get down in the club. and so frankie knuckles started experimenting with a new style of dance music at his home club in chicago, the warehouse. that's where house music gets its name-- not as some people think, from dr. house. although, dr. house does love popping pills. with his partner larry levine, frankie knuckles helped launch the house music scene and the careers of many superstar dejays, like ron harding. it was so entrancing, that one night people continued to dance at his club, even after a

speaker caught on fire. you know a song's good when people keep dance during a fire. that does not happen with cotton eye joe. when i hear that son, i try to start a fire, just so i can get away ♪ where did you come from where did you go ♪ out this burning house. and finally, one of the most iconic voices of house music, the queen of clubland, martha wash. she was half of the famous duo the weather girls who created some of the most iconic music of the 80s, including "it's raining men." unfortunately, due to climate change it's raining men far longer and harder than before. after the weather girls broke up, martha wash ended up with c& c music factory. ♪ everybody dance no ♪ >> instantly recognizable. controversy arrived with the music video when the group cast a french mod toll lip sync

martha's lyrics. she didn't find out until she saw the video. finding out bad news is even worse when it happens on television. you never want the worst moment of your life build by a pine sol commercial. not only that, c& c music factory didn't even credit her for the vocal. yet another employee being mistreated by a factory. but martha wash pushed back and sued c&c factory. she won making vocal credits mandatory in music. that's right. even her lawsuits were hits. whenever you see an album that says something like, "vocals like little pop vert #the lean god," you can thank martha wash for whatever the hell that meant. that wraps up our time with house music, if you like that sort of thing, which personally i do not. maybe i'm old school but that type of music is undignified. shaking my himself like a

heathen? no thank you. there's no commandment about dropping it low. "dirty dancing" was about two people rubbing crotches in public places. that was a terrible thing. what? >> roy! >> is that you, god? i knew you were a black woman. >> no, it's me, martha wash. what's this i hear about you not liking dance music? >> martha, i cannot abide by dance music, not a single note. i'm a man of culture. i shimmy once a decade and that's it. >> nonsense! everyone can dance. everyone must dance. hit it, studio! >> hit what? ♪ it's raining men hallelujah ♪ it's rinning men ♪ >> come on, roy. slow down a little bit. you look like you're boxing a kangaroo. >> i can't help it, martha ♪ it's raining men ♪

>> these hits are satan's kingdom now. that's all the time we have for "c.p. time." i'm roy wood jr. remember, we're for the culture. oh, lord, it's raining me. come on, danny glover ♪ it's raining men ♪ ( cheers and applause ). >> trevor: thank you so much for that roy wood jr. all right, stay tuned, because when we come back, secretary pete buttigieg will be joining us right here on the show. don't go away. ( applause ) when you really need to sleep. you reach for the really good stuff. zzzquil ultra helps you sleep better and longer when you need it most. its non-habit forming and powered by the makers of nyquil.

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♪♪ recently, we got a letter from someone who loves reese's. a real letter... like, on paper! thanks arty from “tonawanda”... you can, uh... you can email us next time. ♪♪ baby, it's over. i mean, we both saw this coming... ♪ ♪ what a difference a day makes ♪ ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is transportation secretary in the biden administration. he is here to talk about infrastructure and so much more. please welcome secretary pete buttigieg. ( applause ) >> trevor: welcome back.

secretary pete buttigieg. welcome back to "the daily show." >> thank you. >> trevor: it's weird because i've known you so long as mayor pete. >> i'll always answer to major pete. >> trevor: you won't be offended. you won't be, "it's secretary mayor pete now. >> that works, too. >> trevor: congratulations on the new job. we haven't seen you since you've gotten it. it's been a lively period to be in this position. let's start with the most important question maybe. there was a $1.2 trillion infrastructure bill passed. you're the person doing a lot of infrastructure. where's our member, pete? what's happening? what are you doing with the member? >> it's going great. last week we announced a use of part of the money to make more transit stations accessible. a couple of weeks before that, we put out the first wave of airport terminal grants. we're improving 84 transport terminals in the country. i was in new jersey, the portal

northbridge-- a couple of folks here recognize it. this bridge, it's the finest construction engineering from the roosevelt administration. the teddy roosevelt administration. >> trevor: wow. >> it is 111 years old. when they swing it back into place, sometimes it works so poorly work version to take sledgehammers in order to get the rails to align. >> trevor: damn. >> we're rebuilding the bridge completely. we broke ground this morning with the governor. >> trevor: sounds really exciting. >> it's everything that we've wanted for a long time in american infrastructure after years and years, years and years of talk. the last president talked a good game about this. now we're actually getting it done. ( applause ). >> trevor: okay, so let's talk about what you're getting it done, how you're getting it done and why. it's interesting that you say that. this is something i find particular particularly strange in american politics. everybody likes infrastructure. however, it seems like people are more or less likely to like it depending on who is building

the infrastructure. so, to your point, trump said, "i want to improve america's infrastructure." people were like, "this is great." when biden said it, it feels like a lot of republicans say, "we don't like it. we don't like how you're spending the money." when you go to the actual communities because that's what infrastructure affects the actual communities, do you find it's still as partisan or when you get on the ground does it have more of an american feel to it? >> in the communities it's incredibly bipartisan. i'm in red states, blue states, purple states. people don't care about the party of the president. they want to get the job done. i was in one of the reddest parts of indiana, southern indiana, where we're upgrading a port in a tiny community, tell city, about seven now people in the whole community. it's a crane on a barge, basically. we're upgrading that. we went there to celebrate what they're going to do to get pig iron on the river. not a single person asked me about republican-democrat stuff

among the residents there. they were just excited. there were a lot of people on capitol hill who voted no. i will say quite a few republicans came over and voted with democrats to get this done. a lot of the ones who voted against it have not hesitated to write us letters about how they'd like that funding to go to their districts which i take to be-- and, you know, we're going to do this without regard to politics. i just consider it in policy world, i'd call it the sincerest form of flattery, when they vote against your stuff -- >> and ask you to come and do the stuff they voted against. it is an interesting position to be in. as a secretary, in many ways, you have to remove the politics from your job. >> yup. >> trevor: even though you are fulfilling the mandate of a person who is inhently political. you're improving the roads, trying to change how america operates. one of the biggest things we've seen is senator joe manchin jumpok board saying let's get some of the money going-- what is it? >> the inflation reduction act. >> trevor: the inflation reduction act.

great. it seems like there's still a lot of tension around e.v.s, electric investigation. i've seen some of your clips online. they get cut up. people splice it to make it look like you're saying what you're not saying. i won't cut you off. but why is the electric vehicle a better, option, when people are saying this is our taxes. why not use the taxes for other purposes? why force it to to go to electric cars. >> first of all, it's a very important part of how we fight climate change. transportation is the biggest sector in our economy emitting these greenhouse gasses. it's better for drivers. you spend mess. on gas. and there's less maintenance. so it's a win-win-win. plus, this is where the automotive industry is going anyway, globally. so it's really important to make sure that our competitiveness is such this is a made in america electric vehicle revolution. now, it's more ideological than it should be on capitol hill.

but, again, the same constituents who are watching this back-and-forth on capitol hill, they're also seeing the super bowl ads. they know what an e.v. actually costs. and hopefully they're seeing we're about to bring that cost lower through the inflation reduction act. some of the same politicians beating us up about e.v.s, saying it's too expufns. they have a chance coming up to vote to make them cheaper. we'll see what they're doing. >> trevor: when you look at the impreuchments, look at the cars and the trains, i'm amazed at how in the american idea, trains seem to be a completely alien concept, you know. when you travel to europe, you see what they're doing with the trains. i mean, japan was one of the most amazing experiences i have had. you get anywhere on a train almost instantly. in america, people almost, you know, make it seem like it's un-american to not drive a car and prefer a train. i know when obama came into hour, he said we should get

high-speed rail going. that was completely thrown out. you are the transportation secretary. are you focusing on that? is there where we'll get super-fast trains to get people across the country, will it revitalize the country? >> yes, and we're taking the first sneps that direction right now. i thought i was the biggest train person i know, but in this administration, i'm always going to be second place after the president when comes to enthusiasm for passenger rail. frankly, the first order of business is to take care of what we've got. we have a huge backlog because there has been a lot of resistance investing in our rail network. >> trevor: where is the resistance coming from? >> some is ideological, some cultural. the way i see twhy shouldn't americans have the best rail in the world if we're a competitive country and believe we ought to be the best. you mention the standard of the japanese-- never mind the japanese standard, if you're in italy or morocco or turkey you can routinely expect faster rail service than the u.s. we can and must change that and

it begins with what we're doing with this bill. >> trevor: sometimes i'll be driving from the airport coming into new york city, and then i'll be driving past people in a train, and i see them looking at the cars going... but we're in a train. and i'm in the traffic like, "you griez in a train." they should be going faster than me, right? >> that is how that generally should work. >> trevor: why isn't it going that way? what's going wrong? >> because you get what you pay for. and this country for basically as long as you and i are alive has been underinvesting in rail. >> trevor: i see. >> when you do, that there's a real cost. it's a win-win. if you do have great rail, that's even good for the people who are in the cars because there's less congestion on the road. same reason we're investing in transit right now. it makes sense, but now more that we're facing the climate change. >> trevor: you're investing in the roads themselves. correct me fiparaphrase you incorrectly-- you basically said america's roads are racist.

>> not exactly what i said. >> trevor: no, no, no. ( laughter ) because i understood what you were saying. say it. >> the spoirnghts there are many places in the u.s. a road or a railroad was used to divide or segregate or even remove a neighborhood. >> trevor: i completely understand. >> the very fact that we have the phrase "wrong side of the tracks" in the american english language tells you something about how infrastructure-- which is supposed to keith can also be used to divide often on racial lines and we have to face that and we can do something about that. >> trevor: what can you do about that? are you going to rip up the roads-- this is what people say "pete buttigieg is coming. he's going to rip the highways. there will be no more highways." what are you actually planning to do to try to right many of those wrongs? >> what we're doing is now that we're making the biggest investment in highways and roads since the eyesen hour administration, we're going to get it right.

infrastructure is supposed to connect not divide divide. some places you might have a road that cuts up a neighborhood. it needs to go underground and put a cap on it and put a on that cap. sometimes it doesn't have to be as elaborate or expensive as that. maybe it's creating a transit link or pedestrian bridge. it will look different in every community. every community is coming to us with ideas about how to do this. the thing, is everybody wins when we do this. nobody is worse off when we recorrect areas that have been separated or segregated. i don't know why anybody would be against us doing that when the whole point of transportation is to connect not twied. >> trevor: i think a lot of people would be against it-- it's almost self-explanatory-- people want hobby here and they want other people to be there. airports are something i definitely want to talk to you about. i know you tweeted about this and i know senator elizabeth warren said, this is what we should do. we should fine the airlines. anyone who has flown knows how

difficult it can be. the airline can almost do anything to you with impunity. they can cancel your flierkt delay your flight 10 times and cancel it, and they won't give you the money, and give you a credit, and the credit may be used or not used. >> this is important-- a little news you can use. if they cancel your flierkt they are entitled to a cash refund, and we enforce that rule. a lot of people don't know that. you get canceled and you call the airline and they say, we'll give you 2,000 miles. how does that sound?" and it might sound good. and that's worth about 20 bucks. and you are entitle titled to potentially hundreds of dollars in refunds. >> trevor: how do i do that? do i get you. people are getting their flights canceled and they don't know how to use the enforcement. >> first of all, when you ask them to give you a refund, they have to do it. when they don't, come to us. we have an entire office of aviation consumer. last year, we issued the biggest fine in the history of the program because an airline was

failing to promptly refund people. you can go to the dot web site and look up your rights as a consumer. we know your rights, we have your back. >> trevor: last but not least, last but not least. you know, midterms are coming up. people are... it's america. people are look at 2024 already. it's interesting because a new new hampshire poll came out recently which had you slightly edging president biden in the race for 2024. now, i know you are secretary, so you can't say anything. it's political and obviously he's your boss and you're not going to say anything bad. if i say to you t, are you going to run?" you wouldn't say you are going to run. when you see a poll like that, does it give you a little more swag in meetings with the president? are you ever like, "joe--" >> if i want to look good in front of my boss, the best thing

i can do is have just broken ground on a major project like we did today in new jersey. that's going to be my focus because that's my job. >> trevor: so slick. so good at what you do. thank you so much for joining me on the show. pete buttigieg, everybody. we're going to take a quick break. we'll be right back after this. thank you very much. great having you back again.

so, i'm a beach side hotel. as you can see, i'm pretty relaxed. i'm looking for someone who likes sand and sun. if you have kids, i'm great with kids. so yeah, that's me. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: well, that's our show for tonight. thank you so much for tuning in.

before we go, i wanted to let you know that recovery efforts are under way after record-breaking floodwaters have hit eastern kentucky. the foundation for appalachian kentucky are doing all they can to help those efforts. so if you can, please, consider supporting them and the important work that they do at the link below. until next time, stay safe out there, and remember, you haven't lost a loved one. you've gained a tax break. now here it is, your moment of zen. ♪ ♪ ♪ >> who would win in a battle between a bear and some pigs? don't get too close to the sea lions. imagine heading outside to start your day and having a face full of spider webs. a bison is a wild animal that will charge after you. this fish is on drugs. lots of drugs. where are sharks born? we all love our pets. but do you love yours enough to clone them? you can.

ahem. maura, i, uh-- i want you to know i've given this a lot of thought. i'm sorry, but, we, uh-- we have to break up. no. what's that? we're not breaking up. -w-we're not? -no. all right. [♪♪]

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