tv The Daily Show With Trevor Noah Comedy Central November 15, 2022 1:15am-2:00am PST
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t regional management supervisor. i'm in development, research, consulting." men, on the other hand, if they are physically attracted to a woman, are not that concerned with her job, are we? men don't really care. men will just go, "really? slaughterhouse? is that where you work? "that sounds interesting. "so, what, you got a big cleaver there? "you just lopping their heads off? "that sounds great. "listen, why don't you shower up, and we'll get some burgers and catch a movie?" [♪♪] ♪ ♪ >> announcer: coming to you from new york city, the only city in america, it's "the daily show." tonight... another crypto collapse. democrats take control of the senate to. nas. this is "the daily show
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with trevor noah." ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> trevor: what's going on, everybody? welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much for tuning in. thank you coming out in person. thank you so much for being here, everybody! take a seat. take a seat. we have got a great joke for you tonight. the democrats are as surprised as you are about winning, donald trump goes to war with everybody, and if you were hoping to lose all your money in crypto, well, then i've got some good news! plus, hip-hop legend in new york's very own nas! so let's do this, people. let's jump straight into today's headlines. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ all right, before we get into the big stories, let's catch up on a few other things going on in the world.
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starting in the u.k., where a protester who threw eggs at king charles has now been banned from carrying eggs in public as a condition of his bail. that just really shows you that england has lost its edge. in the old days, if you came at the king, they'd torture you in the tower of london for the rest of your life. now it's like, "you attacked our king? well, good luck making an omelet now!" and finally, some news from the world of philanthropy. jeff bezos announced that he will be giving dolly parton $100 million to celebrate her good deeds in the world. that's how rich jeff bezos is. imagine being so rich that you think it's charity when you give money to millionaires. "you poor thing, you don't even have a spaceship, do you?" let me break you off some." in major geopolitical news, president biden met for the
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first time with a chinese counterpart, xi jingping. and after the three hour meeting, biden declared that an invasion of taiwan is not imminent. and i know what probably happened here. xi jingping went into that meeting planning to stick it to joe, but first, biden told him about that one time we had a friend who was a baseball pl player, he wrote the amtrak all the way, [mumbling] ice cream, come on, jack. xi jingping was like, you can have that one. i just want you to stop talking. [applause] letslet's move on to some of the bigger stories of the day, starting with the midterms. that magical time of the year where the most exciting thing on tv is steve kornacki doing math. now votes are still being counted across the country, but a few things are clear: one, you can take off your "i voted" sticker now, we get it.
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and two: senate democrats are about to get two more years in the driver's seat. >> let's begin with democrats shocking the political world by retaining control of the united states senate thanks to a win overnight in nevada. >> democrats now taking a victory lap, defying history and expectations, on track to their best midterm performance since john f. kennedy was president. >> this is a very happy day. >> with at least 50 seats and vice president kamala harris's tie-breaking vote, democrats now keep control of the upper chamber, regardless of the outcome of georgia's senate runoff slated for december 6th. holding the senate gives president biden and his party control over the legislative agenda there, and critically, judicial confirmations, including the supreme court if another seat opens up. >> trevor: that's right. now that nevada and arizona have been called, the democrats have officially kept control of the senate for another two years. which is a huge surprise! when chuck schumer heard what happened, his glasses nearly fell right off his face!
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at least i'm assuming that's why they're down there! remember, the reason this is so important is because keeping this and it means that democrats can keep confirming judges, including supreme court justices, like if any of them retire or, let's say, i don't know, gets a dui. >> i still like beer. >> trevor: my man! [cheers and applause] but remember, if republicans take control of the house, then every dream the democrats have of codifying roe vs. wade or taxing the rich or turning pete buttigieg into a real boy, they can't do it. i mean, they probably weren't going to do it anyway but now they have someone to blame. "those pesky republicans!" there is still the georgia runoff in december between raphael warnock and herschel walker, which the democrats don't need anymore in order to control the senate, but it would give them extra cushion for when joe manchin tries to
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cockblock them, or kyrsten sinema goes rogue, or bernie sanders misses a vote because he's arguing with a grocery store manager. "shove that apple pay up your ass, i want to pay with a check! wait, hold on, i wrote the wrong date... give me another chance." so we'll have to wait until december to see what the final count in the senate is, and really, that race can go either way. but can we just admit, now that the stakes are a little lower, you kind of want to see what herschel walker would be like as a senator. i'm not saying they should! i'm not saying they should. i'm not saying it would be good for georgia or for the country, but -- but when he gets mitch mcconnell pregnant with another secret baby, it will be worth it! it will be worth it! [cheers and applause] "he sent me a card." but while democrats are celebrating their success in the
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midterms, republicans are looking ahead to 2024, and the question of who will take on the animated corpse of joe biden for the presidency. so obviously, all eyes are on donald trump, because he's the person who has promised a big announcement from mar-a-lago tomorrow. no one knows what the big announcement could be. it could just be that he successfully walked down a ramp, or that he finally memorized all the words to the mcdonalds big mac song, but everyone is expecting that it's going to be his entry into the presidential race. [audience reacts] and there are a lot of reasons people think that trump is going to run again: he wants to avoid an indictment, he thinks he already won last time, it could be the fact he has a cinemax movie on the white house dvr he wants to watch. "will emmanuelle get back from space? i don't know!" but the biggest hint that he's running again is that he's spent a lot of time recently making
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fun of other republicans who might think of running. he called ron desantis "ron desanctimonious." he mocked mike pence's polling numbers, and last week, he found something to say about a new target: virginia governor glenn youngkin. >> on friday, the former president posted on his social media platform truth social that youngkin's last name "sounds chinese." the post read in part, "young kin. now that's an interesting take. sounds chinese, doesn't it? couldn't have won without me." >> trevor: you know, just when i think trump has had to peek strange, he finds a way to hit it another level. first of all, how are you so racist that you can make an anti-asian remark about a white guy? i don't even understand that. and secondly, how are you so weird that you can surprise yourself and your own texts? he's the one typing that he's like "now that's an interesting
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thing" -- he wrote it! "are you guys seeing what just happened?" he typed it! who are you? [cheers and applause] but the only explanation that makes sense in my head is that he typed the guy's name in, and it auto-corrected to "young kin," and trump was like, having an conversations is autocorrect like "i've never thought of it that way, keyboard, you should be my running mate. so strong, so smart, so clever." [cheers and applause] but this moment here is just another one where you realize that the tide is turning against trump ever since the midterms, because this time, republicans are pushing back against him. yeah, they have come out, they are like, this is not cool, why are you saying this? you realize if it's happened before the midterms, youngkin would have said, "yes, i am a
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chinese man. let's move onto some financial news. after being hailed as the future of money, 2022 has been cryptocurrency's worst year yet. the crypto market has lost $1.3 trillion worldwide. hundreds of cryptocurrencies has completely disappeared and matt damon has moved on to selling herbalife. and now just when we got the crypto world couldn't fall any lower, this happened. >> one popular cryptocurrency exchange is on the brink of collapse this morning. ftx filed for bankruptcy friday, leaving investors scrambling and destabilizing the entire industry. >> the company's 30-year-old ceo sam bankman-fried resigned, and his $16 billion fortune erased. bloomberg has called his meteoric fall from grace one of history's greatest ever destructions of wealth. at its peak, the crypto exchange was worth $32 billion and benefited from superstar endorsements from tom brady, gisele bundchen, naomi osaka, and steph curry.
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the nba's miami heat had its venue renamed as ftx arena just last year, but now that name's coming off the building. the downfall of ftx began earlier this month, when reports raised serious questions about its financial health. those questions triggered a bank-run on the exchange, as too many customers tried to withdraw their assets. by thursday, bankman-fried was apologizing on twitter, saying, "i'm sorry. i [bleep] up and should have done better." >> trevor: yeah, one of the biggest cryptocurrency exchanges has filed for bankruptcy. going from being worth $30 billion to being $8 billion in the hole. do you know how hard it is to lose that much money overnight without buying twitter? this wasn't easy. [cheers and applause] and look. i will say, i am glad that he apologized, but a tweet saying
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"i [bleep] up" doesn't capture the enormity of what you have done. you know? "i [bleep]" is the wrong address, the wrong uber or something. at the very least, you have to add like ten more us because you [bleep] up. this crypto collapse is sending shock waves everywhere, from people losing millions of dollars, to the miami heat changing the name of their arena. i will be honest with you, i feel like this one is on the heat. if you're gonna let a company buy the naming rights to your arena, at least make sure it's an established company, don't commit to some crypto start-up that's been around for two years. this is like going on a first date and then when the person goes to the bathroom, you get a lower back tattoo of their name. "yeah, there's no way this could backfire. yeah! wait, it is janice? i thought it was jenny!"
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you have to admit, it is crazy that it crypto collapse can take so much real money with that. think about it. it is fake money, but people lost real savings. it's like finding out someone's imaginary friend died by driving your car off a cliff. you are like "how? your friend wasn't real?" "they were real to me!" personally, i hope tom brady didn't invest too much of his money in this company, because otherwise he will never be able to retire. he will be 90 years old in the huddle just like, "you got to run a post out left. you, block the blitz. remember the time that that baseball player used to go to the pool with the kids? come on, jack! come on, let's do it!" all right, that's it for the headlines, but before we go to a quick break, let's check in on the stock market with our finance expert, michael kosta, everybody! [cheers and applause]
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michael, absolute insanity. what is happening in the market today? >> trevor, i am crushing it. i am crushing it so hard that i too should be banned from carrying eggs because i would crush them, okay? i got a hot tip for you, so pay attention, got a hot tip for you. obviously, trevor, today it's all about crypto and ftx, which collapsed last week. this is really important. people are losing their third houses because of this. now obviously, i didn't invest in ftx. i didn't like that tom brady was promoting it. i have a very simple investing rule: don't take financial advice from people who get hit in the head all day. okay? that is why the only athletes i listen to our swimmers. okay? they don't get hit in the head. now this is important. wait until they are out of the pool to hear what they have to say. otherwise, you put all of your money into [indistinct] pay attention to this right
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here. this 52-week low, 1.2, that is low! okay? now i'm an expert, i don't expect you to understand numbers, but let me explain this to you. 0 is the bottom. you can't get to lower than 0, unless there is a windshield. so -- a windchill. so this looks like the price of ftx tokens but what this chart actually represents is the age of people who trust crypto. okay? in november, it's, 20, 25, maybe at one point it reached 30 years old but now the only group that trust crypto, 2.5-year-olds, trevor. yeah. [applause] two and a half-year-olds believe in crypto because they will believe in anything, you know? they believe in santa claus, they believe in the tooth fairy, they believe i actually got your nose. trevor, this one kid gave me 20 bucks to give it back to him.
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i am crushing it. i am crushing it. it is gotten so bad, if you ask a 4-year-old about crypto, they will be like, absolutely not, i'm not an idiot. will you take me to the potty so i can make a doo doo? why did this happen? the founder. one man, three names. sam bankman-fried. the writing is on the wall, everybody. noel, noel, specifically, this wall. bank man fried? if that is not a warning. yeah. i am an expert. if that is not a warning, i don't know what is. would you at a restaurant where the chef was named "brian undercooked chicken?" >> trevor: [laughs] >> he did try to save the company by going to his chief rival for a bailout. that has got to be tough. that is like asking your wife's tennis coach for sex tips.
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which reminds me, jake, you got to call me back, dude, i mean. lastly, this is yet another reminder that we shouldn't automatically assume that nerdy, quirky looking people are geniuses, right? the same way you got to be careful that these handsome guys on tv in their suits, giving you these financial tips, just because they are standing in front of a stock chart, people will trust them with their life savings. it is disgusting. okay? by the way, i got a h hot tip fr you. if you are still in on crypto, i got your nose. if you want it back? give me some money. >> trevor: michael costa, everybody. thank you so much. when we come back, what dominic roy wood jr. will visit wakanda, so don't go away. >> hey, everyone, i'm twitter's new head of communications, there's a lot going on right now, but i just want to ensure you that everything is under
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control. comedy is legal on twitter again. please stop impersonating elon musk, please stop impersonating your advertisers and please stop impersonating me. i do not eat my own farts. we are pausing blue text. you can't eat a fart. comedy, it is mostly legal. if you have any questions, contact customer support. no, they were fire. for eight bucks a month, everyone can get a check mark, a great check mark, and visible check mark. if you have any questions, contact a verification team, no, they were fired. generally is not coming out of the car called the hitler mobile. comedy has been downloaded to semi legal. if you see a verified account, please assume it is fake. fake tweet alert, everyone, john kerry is not "so horny his knots about to bust." comedy is illegal on twitter. well, i am fired, it has been fun. i am back. from now on, if you want to imitate someone, your bio has to
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[cheers and applause] >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." last weekend was the premier of the new "black panther" movie, "wakanda forever," but did you know t'challa is not the first black superhero? for more, we turn to roy wood junior in another episode of "cp time." ♪ ♪ >> hi, welcome to "cp time," the only show that is full of
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culture. today, we will be discussing black superheroes. iconic characters like falcon, war machine, cyborg, the dude at churches chicken who puts onion rings in your bag of fries. that dude uses his powers for good. black superheroes are not new. in fact, they have been squeezing into spandex for decades. dating as far back as 1936. when cartoonist jay jackson created "speed jackson" in the chicago defender newspaper. "b jackson" was a former track star at howard university who wt or. which may not sound powerful compared to today's superheroes with their laser eyes and sticky spider hands. but you have to think about it like sports. today's best athletes are the pinnacle of human physicality, while the best athletes from the 1930s were just the ones with the least polio. times change. jackson used his abilities to fight against fascists during the war, and right the wrongs of
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a racist society. which is tough, because superpowers don't help when you are fighting systemic racism. it doesn't matter if you have the strength of ten men in front of those men can get a mortgage. in 1947, black superheroes made the leap from comic strip to comic book. with "lion man," a cat themed superhero who protected the world's largest uranium deposit in africa's gold coast. although a cat may not have been the best animal to defend a valuable resource. sure, cats are fast and agile, but you get in there one of the 22 hours they are asleep, and the uranium is yours. lion man was created by orrin evans, who intended his comic to counter the racial distortion seen in other comics. although, i think he was trying to avoid racial stereotypes, i think it is fair to say the results were mixed. look at lion man right there. shirtless with a loincloth and
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an arrow through his butt. somehow, that is still the least problematic character on the cover. despite how it looks today, lion man was still groundbreaking as an all-black written and illustrated comics, even if now the cover looks like tucker carlson tried to draw africa. in the 1970s, there was an explosion of black superheroes. characters like black lightning, black falcon, and black goliath, basically, if you were trying to create an african american hero in the '70s, you put the word "black" in front of whatever was lying around you in the apartment. this week, black chandelier band owes it out against his arch nemesis "black candy wrapper." but the most popular of the superheroes was the newest member of the x-men, storm, an african priestess who could control the weather to keep the rain from messing up her hair. storm was a landmark character
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for both black and female representation in comics. on top of that, she is definitely the best x-men. you know i am right. who is better than storm? what is your power? if i hold my boyfriend's hand too long, he will die. wolverine is indeed strong, except for when he has to go through the tsa. professor x can read minds, but that means he also sees all the sex stuff is on and we are it's hard to look at magneto when you know how much he loves feet. in the 1990s, black superheroes make it to the big screen. in 1993, robert townsend directed "the media man," a film about a mild-mannered teacher who was hit by a radioactive meteor and got superpowers. i must say, it is bold to name yourself after the worst thing that has ever happened to you. my superhero name would be "sheila left him" man. but the power to eat one whole can of tuna over the sink. you were right, sheila, i can't
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do better. in 1998, marvel bet on black with the "blade" franchise. wesley snipes started as a vampire hunter to great box office success. "blade" was a powerful guy, he managed to be that cool while wearing the same sunglasses as guy fieri. it's also why there is no vampires and flavor town. he became the first major theatrical success for marvel, scenting off the wave of marvel phones in the next two decades because wesley snipes proved that no one's powerful enough to defeat marvel heroes. except for the irs. [laughs] please, don't punch me, wesley snipes. now black superheroes are everywhere. they've been taking over the mantle of formerly white heroes, we have an african american
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green lantern, iron man, captain america, and spider-man. no black bruce wayne, though. that requires too much generational wealth. well, that's it for "cp time." and remember, before -- what's that? it is the cp single. someone needs them to tell them about black history! i'm on the way, florida! to the cp mobile. i need some gas money for the cp mobile. i can't afford it. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> trevor: thank you, roy. when we come back, the legendary nas will be joining me on the show. you don't want to miss it. you don't want to miss it. [cheers and applause] [group laughing]
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quaker oats. the auburns value time spent together. to share wisdom... i got some of my gold before i came to this country. i got some of my gold before you passed the bread. encourage one another... i can buy gold for this?! you can buy gold for this. and talk about life's wins and misses. responsibly sourced like my gold but not responsibly cooked. because at the end of the day, nothing keeps it all together quite like - gold. visit invest.gold to see how gold is everyone's asset. ahhhh, froze. it's your computer! oh, hi. i'm corinne. i have a new intel® evo™ laptop with super-fast wi-fi, long-lasting battery and it charges really fast, and it runs all these programs at the same time,
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and i think i'm the star of the family now. i don't think i'm the star of the family now... it's the rest of the world that does. well, i wouldn't know. i can't get on the internet. a laptop that has it all? that's intel® evo™. [cheers and applause] >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a grammy award-winning rap legend here talk to about his new album, "king's disease iii," which is out now. please welcome the one and only nas! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> trevor: welcome back to the e show. >> thank you for having me. >> trevor: welcome back, congratulations on the new album. i was thinking about this today when we were talking about you
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coming on, i was like, you are a living hip-hop legend. [cheers and applause] and i think the significance of that for me lies in the meaning both ways. one, you are still in the game, you are still doing it, you are still contributing, you are still making great music, but also, you are a living hip-hop legend. we take for granted how many legends we have lost in hip-hop, we take for granted how many legends who are not around that were part of it. do you ever wake up and think to yourself, damn, so many of the people i started within the game aren't here anymore and i am still here getting to be a part of it? >> all the time. all the time. a friend of mine today called me and told me, said, you realize how long you have been around and how much you survived and things you have been through? we just lost a hip-hop artist the other week, man, takeoff. may he rest in peace. and i lost so many friends even before i got into music.
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i didn't think i would get into music and still see it going on. >> trevor: you have done it, you have done more than just survive it, you have succeeded in it, thrived in it. i think what i love about this album is how it feels like you almost reminiscing whilst also writing a piece of the future. >> yeah. when you have always been -- until this day, one of the bed gratis lire's that have ever lived. the store that you tell, for instance, everyone who wasn't hip hip-hop is familiar with your beef with jay-z, what it was, and i love hearing you talk about that beef, what it was, how it disappeared, but how will you will still text them saying, "you know this isn't over, right?" >> [laughs] i released a tracklist for the album the other day, he released a picture with all of his grammies. >> trevor: [laughs] >> yeah. shout out to him. and shout out to hit the boy who produced this album, the entire album, he produced the other two albums and also the album
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"magic," slipped in two albums in four years. [cheers and applause] yeah, thanks, man. thanks. and the reason i think it happened is because we started the first one in 2020 when the pandemic it, so at first i was scared to come outside and then hit the boy was in the studio like, come on man, it is a month, you haven't left your house. he got me to come outside, had nothing else to do, finish the first one really quick, we should do this again. we are on the third one, my label -- >> trevor: i would love to know that, when you look at hip-hop as a whole, you were there when it was only seeing as gangster rap. you were there when it was completely ostracized from society, now it's at the super bowl, now it is a hockey game. that is when it was like, okay, hip-hop has done it. you know? >> [laughs] >> trevor: for real. i love to know where you would like to see the game progressing to now that it is not in the exact same place it was before.
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>> i think it evolved and i think people can realize that you don't have to be scared of it. we learn from our mistakes and we can grow with it. we don't have to stay doing one thing. the ones who stay doing one thing, unfortunately they fall off, and we have to understand that hip-hop now is going on 50 years, we've been behind this whole 50 years will be next year, hip-hop has been alive, so we have been behind trying to curate this museum that is coming up in the bronx right now. >> trevor: it's amazing. speak with the mayor has even gotten involved, mayor adams. and i noticed one thing, artists don't think they can go past, or we have to be all in one area trying to fight for crumbs. and it's like, hip-hop is a multisound genre. so in rock, you don't compare kids to the rolling stones. but in hip-hop for some reason, we are fighting for the same thing and you feel like you have
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to be the number one guy all the time. so hip-hop is multisound genre. you can have multiple things going on at once, doesn't matter if you are 20 years old or 40 years old or whatever, it is a beautiful culture and i love all of it, so i think that we should all, as writers, get out of the comfort zone and spread your wings and expand your sound. >> trevor: i really like that. [applause] before i let you go, i want to talk about that idea of being more. we know you for the music. we know you for being the restaurant business and doing extremely well, being successful without. we also know you -- >> you've been there? >> trevor: it's phenomenal, people like that. people were like, nas owns this chicken? i would like this chicken. it's a weird way that someone said this to me. you are also getting involved in a different type of storytelling, which is in film, i know that you directed a
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documentary, that talks about the supreme world -- his underworld in queens and i know that you are also involved in a really fascinating story about the civil rights icons, everyone, malcolm x and martin luther king jr., et cetera. what is it about that world that entices you? why are you stepping into documentaries, filmmaking et cetera, and doing well at it? >> i am a movie buff, i love films. >> trevor: for real? >> i love them, love empirical halloween, i was going friday the 13th crazy. i want to see "halloween ends." >> trevor: what is the movie that you can never get enough of? you watch it over and over and over? >> "beat street," the old school hip-hop film. that is my favorite. then it's the "godfather," and all of that stuff, "godfather" is a family movie. >> trevor: [laughs] >> but yeah, i love films, i love steven spielberg, i wrapped about him in one of my first
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raps and i always wanted to get into it so "the supreme team" is about the underworld organization in queens, we hear about the gottis, but we don't hear about this so i like to uncover the good come of the bad, the ugly in america, some innocent people, some are guilte are innocent probably. but the new one, "the invaders" that just came out, catch it on apple, amazon prime, it's about this organization of intellectuals, vietnam vets who got together, who were trying to strike against garbage truck company where someone was killed on its faulty truck and there was no pensions and money was bad and martin luther king came down there and he stood with the memphis people, the people that were striking and he found out who the invaders were and they wanted to protect the march, the first march went bad. of course, we know the end, how martin luther king -- what
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happens. but there is another look into that story through the eyes of the invaders. and most of them are still alive and it is a really good picture, 1967, it's amazing. there's so many stories to uncover all over the world. here is my world, i want to talk about it. another one, a michelin star restaurant, you got to go there. you got to go. >> trevor: that is you? >> it's not me but i'm a part of it. >> that is me. >> trevor: wow! i appreciate it. thank you so much for being on the show. "king's disease iii" is out now. we're gonna take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. [cheers and applause]
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[cheers and applause] >> trevor: well, that's our show for tonight, but before we go: please consider donating to city harvest. this is a new york city organization and they are actually new york city's first and largest food rescue organization. that has delivered more than one billion pounds of nutritious food and delivered it to hundreds of food pantries and
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soup kitchens across new york city. if you can help them in their work fighting food insecurity, please donate at the link below. until next time, stay safe out there and remember: the safest investments are where you use other people's money. now, here it is. your "moment of zen." ♪ ♪ >> live television, gang. that is live tv for you. >> excuse me, my kids are here, live tv. >> we will do it live! >> on the scene at the garden and has more. [quirky music] - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪
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♪ gonna have myself a time - ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind - ♪ ample parking day or night ♪ ♪ people spouting howdy neighbor ♪ - ♪ headin' on up to south park ♪ ♪ gonna see if i can't unwind - ♪ [muffled] - ♪ come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine ♪ the holidays were lonely for the yeti. but after saving big with early black friday at amazon... yeti became more... social.
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