thank you. what? do you have something in your pocket? a chunky. do you want half? no, thank you. okay. (michael) it is a message. it is an inspiration. it is a source of beauty. and without paper, it could not have happened. unless you had a camera. ♪ ♪ >> announcer: coming to you from new york city, the only city in america, it's "the daily show." tonight... chat bots are talking. the history of drag. and tressie mcmillan cottom!

this is "the daily show with trevor noah." ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> trevor: what's going on, everybody? welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much for tuning in. thank you coming out in person. thank you for being here! thank you for being here! take a seat, everybody. we have got a great show for you tonight. donald trump is beefing with the constitution. dulce sloan gets into drag. and artificial intelligence could replace us all or has it already? so let's do this, people. let's jump straight into today's headlines. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ all right, before we get into the big stories, let's catch up on a few other things going on in the world. starting with the world cup. on saturday, the world's biggest

sporting event kicked off the round of 16 with another lens of scoring another victory in the united states learning firsthand why they call it the knockout stages. this was especially humiliating for the u.s. because the dutch team plays in those little wooden shoes. but don't be sad. the good news for america is the next world cup will be in the u.s. yeah. [cheers and applause] which means all the players will be allowed to use guns. yeah. don't worry, don't worry. they can't use their hands to shoot them. should be interesting. in international news, after months of protests over its strict hijab laws, iran is reportedly considering abolishing its infamous morality police. [cheers and applause] yeah, that's right. if that happened, it would be wild. iran might defund the police before milwaukee. speaking of orality police, some

use out of the u.s. supreme court. this morning, the justices heard arguments on whether a colorado web designer can refuse to build websites for gay weddings, which she says violates her religious beliefs. i'm sorry, but what is this web designers process that making a wedding website violates her religious beliefs? is it like, "okay, i'm adding your hotel block info. time and date of the ceremony. a hardcore video of you two [bleep] each other. and done!" all right, let's move on to some of the bigger stories of the day. starting with twitter: it's what elon musk bought for his mid-life crisis instead of a lamborghini. over the weekend, elon released the so-called "twitter files," which conservatives had hoped would prove that twitter colluded with democrats to censor news about hunter biden's laptop during the 2020 election. instead, they mostly just showed the biden campaign asking

twitter to take down nude photos of hunter biden. so yeah, sorry, everyone, if you want to see naked people, you've got to go to every other website on the internet, i guess. it turned out to be a major letdown for conservatives. there was no proof of a conspiracy to help defeat donald trump. but you know who doesn't care about any of that? donald trump. >> former president donald trump's false claims about the 2020 election now have him calling for the constitution to be terminated. with the revelation of mass and widespread fraud and deception and working closely with big tech companies, the dnc and the democratic party, do you throw the presidential election results of 2020 out and declare the rightful winner or do you have a new election? a massive fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the constitution."

>> trevor: yeah, that's right. the republican front runner for president of the united states wants to terminate the constitution because twitter wouldn't allow him to see hunter biden's dick. he's like "i want to see the pee pee, i want to see what i'm dealing with it." >> trevor: if you want to see hunter biden's dick, just get a bag of cocaine like everybody else. why is this news? donald trump think this undermines the election. he thinks this about everything. however the math equation starts, his answer is always the same. i'm sorry, sir, the kitchens as we run out of the mickey mouse pancakes. "this is the last straw. we need to redo the election." "we do have the donald duck waffles." "it is too late. i'm storming the capital."

2020 is over. you have to move on. trump is like one of those guys who never stops trying to get back with his ex. he's texting her years later like... "hey, u up?" she's like, "yeah, i'm up, with my kids, from my marriage." "still playing hard to get, huh? i like that. i like that." honestly, though, what a start to the trump 2024 campaign. first, he had a dinner with nazi lovers now he's calling to scrap the constitution. is he going to give the lincoln memorial enormous boobs, and the g.o.p. is going to say, i think president trump's heart is in the right place? but enough of trump and his craziness. let's calm things down with a news story out of tampa, florida, where we finally found the answer to the quantum physics paradox, what happens when a police officer pulls over the chief of police? >> tampa's top cop has been

placed on administrative leave after she flashed her badge, apparently using her status as police chief to get out of a traffic stop. >> after the deputy proceeds to explain to them why they were being pulled over, which by the way was because they were driving a golf cart on a public road without the appropriate tags, this happened. >> is your camera on? >> it is. >> i'm the police chief in tampa. >> oh, how you doing? >> i'm doing good. >> okay. >> i'm hoping that you'll just let us go tonight. >> okay, yeah. all right, folks, well, have a good night. oh, all right. >> if you ever need anything, call me. >> okay. >> serious. >> all right, appreciate that. >> thank you. >> yes, ma'am. you're welcome. >> thank you for your service. >> trevor: oh! [laughs] first of all, i think it's crazy that she asks if the officer's body cam is on before incriminating herself. what was she gonna do if he said the bodycam was off?

"it's not recording, just back up over the head, just hit him." i love that she does that thing, she does that thing that white people do when they act like it hurts them to pull rank over y you. she's like, "do you know, turns out, i'm the chief of police." "yeah, that's -- i didn't want to bring it up, but i am." why do people doing that shit. they will go to hotel saying, "can i get a late check out for my room? "i'm sorry, sir, we can't accommodate you." "i own the hotel. i am brad radisson." that's what i love about black people. there is no pain about pretending to wield their power. "i'm sorry, sir, we can't do that late check out for you. "bitch, i own the hotel.

i check out when i want to. you don't tell me when i can check out of my own hotel. you can check out." now after this video came out, the mayor of tampa suspended this police chief, and because of the pressure, she was forced to resign. can i say, that's the biggest waste of a scandal of all time. this is what, you realize there were police chiefs who have stolen millions of dollars in drug money. meanwhile, she's out here, like, "yeah, i pulled some strings and drove super slow on the highway." enough about that. let's move onto a story that had the internet buzzing all weekend and it's about artificial intelligence, which by the way, is not when you regurgitate an "atlantic" article and act like you thought about yourself. for years, people would wonder when we would see the next step in natural language processing from the world of ai and it looks like the future is already here. >> a new artificial intelligence is astounding the internet with its ease of use and human-like writing ability. chatgpt was opened to the public

last weekend, and many have already posted their interactions with the bot. so far, it's written television scripts, fixed coding errors, and even explained scientific concepts in the voice of a pirate. >> trevor: yeah, that's right. for years, people have been saying, robots might be able to pack boxes but they will never be able to write a poem like human beings. turns out your shit-poetry has some competition. it is insane. not only can it understand the question you are asking, but it teaches you the most complicated topics, it can design a lesson plan, it can give you the information, it is not regurgitating it, it's explaining it to you. it can also write out the answers as if a pirate was teaching at. do you understand how amazing that is? like, quantum physics, a pirate on top of that? i wish i had this technology as a kid. the only reason i failed any

secret is because the teacher was boring. but if blackbeard was teaching me about physics? i would have remembered everything. "light operates as both a wave and a particle, the same way you can operate as a human and fish food. walk the plank! argh! don't forget to do your homework!" obviously, this technology has a lot of people asking, is this going to replace my job as a teacher or as a receptionist, a journalist or even an author? the truth is, we don't really know. but it is interesting to see how our fears about a i have shifted radically over the years. in the '80 is an '90s, without in the future, people would be like "these damn machines are wiping out the human race!" and now our fear is that in the future, we will be like "puce damn machines keep writing love letters to my wife! she's going to leave me!"

and you got to admit, it is weird that we are obsessed with robots talking like humans but we all hate talking to actual humans. everyone is using like, " "wow, it's like i'm talking to my mom!" "your mom is calling you right now." "eh, let it go to voicemail. ask it if it is proud of me." that's it for the headlines, but before we go to a break, it's time to check in on all the latest social media trends with our very own ronny chieng. ronny chieng, everybody! [cheers and applause] >> thank you, thank you! i have been poring through tweets, instagrams, tiktoks, snap chats, only fans, mastodons, only vans again, and now i am mentally ill. here is what is trending. the world cup, where for 90 minutes, two countries put politics aside and hate each

other based on pure ethnicity. today, croatia beat japan and brazil knock south korea out. and the thing about the world cup is that when you come from a country like me, malaysia, that is never in the world cup, all you can do is cheer for people who look a little bit like you. japan, korea, and when they get eliminated, you just cheer for whoever is not white. so france. but the big story of the day, as you said, was the ai chat about, for [bleep] charles dickens robot trying to make siri look illiterate. personally, i don't like the spot because every time you ask a question, it cranks out a 10,000 word think peace. relaxed. we've got enough humans with opinions. i don't need my room but to develop a hot take on anti-semitism. and by the way, did i miss an update or something? because we've got robots writing sonnets here. every time i call verizon, that

robot can't recognize me saying "yes." bring back the future ai, bring back that one. that one was cool. they were putting brink in the matrix. that was useful. all right? and if you don't recognize this, that means you are not on black twitter enough because that shit was popping. follow me at stir-fry. and by the way -- still for the black people -- by the way, i know you are saying this ai is going to take over all our jobs, okay? or maybe it will. but i'm not worried about taking over comedy jobs, because ai can't do a redo. ai doesn't have the emotion, the artistry, or the fundamental ability to get hit in the balls. and as we know, nothing is as funny as getting hit in the balls. i mean, the magic of what we do is not a mathematical equation. ow! do you see that?

do you see that, trevor? do you see how funny that was? nai bot could never do that! you can kiss my ass, r2-d2. everyone is so excited about this thing but look, look at what people are tweeting about it. look at this guy. look at this idiot. "ai is the future." oh, wow. what a genius. did this guy go to mit? what's he going to predict next? that apple will come out with a new iphone next year? i mean, i hope this guy is a bot because no human would write anything that stupid. anyway. trevor, i got to go meet this really hot woman online. she really likes me and she is smart as hell and she talks like a pirate. see you later.

>> trevor: good luck with that. when we come back, dulce sloan is going to school all of us on drag, so don't go away. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> trevor: today's do not try this if you have african parents. yeah, because you will be like "i faked my kidnapping" and they will be like "put your funeral will be real." if you told an african parent that you will not swim without a lifeguard, they would be like "you know who is your lifeguard? jesus." but an african mother, she is mad, you know it. she will be like "i will show you how much i love you with how hard i spank you. 150 pounds. have you eaten in your life? go back to the food court." "one big country full of drafts." "can you pick this up for me? she will be like, are you serious. are you telling me to pick up?

there is only one king and not as jesus. there is only one king in this world and that is jesus. ♪ ♪

[upbeat music] [sound of tape application] i just need you to sign option three. [cheering] ♪ ♪ ♪ this year, we're helping our customers save for the 1.7 million things that matter most to them. ♪ just another reason why we're all better off with an ally. ♪

with the new law, our family found a healthplan for less than $57 a month and knowing that we are covered, it simplifies life. with my plan for $0 a month, i know i can get the care i need to live my best life. they were able to make sure that i was taken care of. it was really life changing to have that. and i only pay $16 a month for the first time in my life, i found a great plan for $0 a month. healthcare.gov is here for millions like you. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show."

drag shows are growing through a tumultuous time in america. on the one hand, it has never been more popular. but on the other, it has become the target appeared right-wing backlash. as we saw just this weekend in ohio. >> demonstrators protested a drag storytelling event in ohio over the weekend. it was supposed to take place at a church but was canceled because of safety concerns. several dozen members of the far right proud boys and patriot front stood along the roads toting guns and face masks. some chanted "reclaim america." others gave a nazis salute. >> trevor: you know, i don't know if it is a chemical reaction or genetic predisposition but any time a white man covers his face and white fabric, ain't no good coming after that. because all over america, more and more stories like this are popping up, with grown men showing up to drag shows to fight the tyranny of people wearing dresses and having fun. what you have to admit is a

little ironic, isn't it? these guys running around angry, these grown men dressing up in these ridiculous costumes! it's not right! are you in the military, sir? no, but the character is a navy seal. do you like it? do you like it? and conservatives will give different reasons for why drag must be stopped. you know, some say it is immoral, some say that it sexualize his kids. some say that monet x. change should have won season 7 of "all-stars" and they'll never forgive rupaul for that! but if you ask us, this just show how little conservatives know about drag. so here to educate all of us is our very own dulce sloan. ♪ ♪ >> drag dates all the way back to the world's most ancient civilizations. i am talking the incas, the aztecs, the egyptians. basically, anyone that could build a pyramid also had.

why did you think every man, woman, and eagle and ancient egyptian art had a smoky eye? now drag was originally done in ancient civilizations for tribal and religious ceremonies. it is pretty much how priest got started wearing muumuus. it wasn't until modern times that drag played a role and entertainment and not just any entertainment. i am talking about the bad bitch bard himself, shakespeare. back in his time, men dressed in drag to play women's roles. although that was less about drag and more about keeping women out of acting. these things are some bullshit, horatio. for a long time, the stage is pretty much the only place drag was susceptible. it wasn't until the 18th century in england that drag performer started to express themselves outside the theater. they had residences where they could safely dresses her female alter egos in those places became known as molly houses. it was at these molly houses where the first prominent drag queen was born. she was the first drag queen to take her drag out of the molly

houses and into public events like masquerade balls. and it was a big deal, and incredibly brave, because it meant volunteering to deal with catcalls. now while 18th century england gave us drag queens, 19th century america gave us drag balls. it is the only time queens colonized a country and made it better. one of the most famous drag performers at that time was a former enslaved african named william dorsey swann, dorothy slade so hard he went on to become a pioneer of modern ballroom culture. there are no existing photos of the queen herself because how dare you. she was too glamorous to have her image captured by your presence! no! but for reference, historians believe her look was probably something like this. now that is fashion! come through, breeder ten! americas drag balls brought the culture to the next level. in harlem, it became so popular that men and women put come from all over to present their looks to a panel of judges pageant style. and you know there is something

comforting in knowing that even hundreds of years ago, people were telling someone to their face that they were a messy bitch who's out fish is trash. the circle of life. in the early 1900s, one of the top drag performers was william dalton are better known by his drag name, julian eltinge. look at those outfits. look at how good her makeup is! and that was before bright and wild. she pulled that off with house paint and beet juice. julian was able to take her drag mainstream, performing on broadway, and even in front of king edward. of course, he liked at. that dude could rock a cape. in fact, the king was so impressed, julian was a bulldog, which personally, i don't think it's a great price. i want something that doesn't need to shit three times a day. drag balls exploded throughout the 1920s and 30s, but like with most things, popularity brings out the haters. mainstream actor started liking them to homosexuality, and soon, masquerade laws were passed.

prohibiting cross-dressing and public. you know what that meant. that's right. the harry styles world tour was canceled! due to these laws, drag went underground again, and it wasn't until the late '80s at a return to the mainstream. but when it came back, oh, it came back in a big way. drag performers were featured in major motion pictures, including one of the best known sisters of the silver screen, divine, who started the movie "hair spray" and was the inspiration for the disney character ursula. damn. kirby, and credible singing voice, and impeccable taste? are you sure we are not talking about me? thanks to all of these brave drag performers, today we have hit shows featuring drag queens and we have a good reason to eat a meal as beautiful as brunch. so to all of the outrage conservatives trying to drag drag through the mud, open a history book! i know you hate those, but now they have pictures! ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> trevor: thank you so much for that, dulce.

stay tuned because when we come back, "new york times" best-selling author tressie mcmillan cottom will be put joining me on the show. you don't want to miss it. [cheers and applause] [television]: ♪ feliz navidad, feliz navidad ♪ ♪ deseamos que todos ♪ ♪ tengan un mundo lleno de amor y paz ♪ [click] ♪ yo soy mago, je, desaparezco, puff, je, sí ♪ ♪ la cuenta' 'tan llena ♪

♪ está muy fuerte como, puff, uh, yeah ♪ ♪ mira cómo to' esto' niños aquí quieren ser como yo, ♪ ♪ no como tú, toy ♪ ♪ flexin' en coop, ♪ ♪ vos sos fantasma, ♪ ♪ solo dices: "boo", eh (eh), yo ♪ ♪ je, desaparezco, puff, je, sí ♪ ♪ está muy fuerte como, puff, uh, yeah ♪ ♪ kevin! kevin! kevin? oh nice. kevin, where are you... kevin?!?!?.... hey, what's going on? i'm right here! i was busy cashbacking for the holidays

with chase freedom unlimited. i'm gonna cashback on a gingerbread house! oooh, it's got little people inside! and a snowglobe. oh, i wished i lived in there. you know i can't believe you lost another kevin. it's a holiday tradition! that it is! earn big time with chase freedom unlimited. ♪ i'd like to thank our sponsor liberty mutual. they customize your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need. contestants ready? go! only pay for what you need. jingle: liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty.

♪ lookin' for some hot stuff, baby, this evenin' ♪ ♪ i need some hot stuff, baby, tonight ♪ ♪ i want some hot stuff, baby, this evenin' ♪ applebee's new sizzlin' skillets, starting at just $10.99. [cheers and applause] >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a professor at unc chapel hill and a "new york times" columnist. she's one of my favorite guests so i'm delighted to have her back on the show. please welcome tressie mcmillan cottom! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪

>> trevor: tressie mcmillan cottom. welcome back to "the daily show." >> welcome back to me indeed. it's a pleasure to be back. >> trevor: do i say professor? i would love to know what you prefer. because you have so many prestigious titles. "new york times" best selling author, could be professor, could be mcarthur -- is it a genius grant to give you? >> you can say that. i think i am not supposed to say that. the foundation would prefer not. >> trevor: that is interesting. they say you are a genius but you are not allowed to say it of yourself. >> exactly. kind of like your mother tells you some things are best set about you by others. >> trevor: i see. you are amazing, but don't ever think that about yourself. well, then, i will say to you, the genius professor t that is tressie, welcome to the show. >> thank you very much. [cheers and applause] >> trevor: what a time to have you on, because there are few

people who i have enjoyed learning from, engaging with, studying, because you are not just a professor. you are a sociologist. you are someone who looks at the world, you study what is happening, what has happened, and how you think it will happen going forward. right now feels like an interesting time of everything that is going on. let's start with one of our favorite platforms that we chat on all the time, twitter. it has been a really interesting time on twitter right now. >> yes, that's an understatement. >> trevor: i try. i specialize in those. >> [laughs] >> trevor: i would love to know your opinion on twitter itself and how we see its role in our society. there are some who say, because it is a business, elon can do whatever he wants, he paid for it, he can take it, he can do as he pleases. on the other hand, people saying elon taking over twitter -- which has become this public square -- only goes to show how dangerous it can be to have billionaires defining what everyone else can speak, what their speech might end up being.

>> and all of those things are true. they are not true to my mind in equal parts. i think the bigger story here is that we outsourced the public square to the private sector. right? twitter becomes, or it feels like the public square, but it has never operated in practice as a public square. it cannot. it is not owned by the state or by the people. in fact, one of the things that the minority people, queer people have said for years about twitter is that they could not participate the same way that really powerful brands could participate or politicians or trolls. so in a true public square, there would be some way for people to talk back, right, to the powers that be. that has never been twitter. that has never been any social media platform. that is a difference between a business and something that is truly public. so it is a business. elon musk can buy it as he was eventually forced to do.

[laughter] you know, he wrote a check and then he had to catch it and that is how we find ourselves here, t we have used it to try to express sort of people power, it does not mean that the people own it or have any authority over it. what that says to me and what i think it says too many other people is that there should be a public space. we are in an information society. information is power, it is money. why don't we have a civic public square that exists on the internet? elon musk buying twitter would not have mattered if the state was competing with twitter. >> trevor: thought is interesting. [applause] do you think, many of these ideas are sound, except when you add in that the state in question would be america. >> yes. [laughs] >> trevor: i mean this not because of america's inept or anything but rather because america sees everything through the lens of left or right,

democrat, republican, always, doesn't matter what the issue is. it feels like america itself would never be able to create something like this because both sides wouldn't agree on what the thing should or shouldn't be. >> absolutely. we see this debate about everything that is publicly governed, particularly ourschoo? where we cannot agree on whether or not our schools are indoctrinating our children or should be preparing them for the economy of the future. somehow, americans want to do both. don't teach my children anything, but make sure that they can be competitive in the economy of the future. >> trevor: [laughs] >> you know what, that is a mess of democratic participation. it does not mean that we get it right. it means that there is a way to get it right sometimes. we don't have to have the whole thing figured out for us to invest in publicness, so i teach at a public university in north carolina. i teach a lot of the students who will go on to work in libraries and in the information sector. you know, libraries are to me the shining example on the hill

of what a public space can be, of a perfect -- are they perfect? absolutely not. but do they welcome people into them and be people where they are? absolutely. can america do that? yes. now do we have to fight to do it? every step of the way, absolutely. but we can have that fight. we can't have that fight when an entity is owned by a single megalomaniac. [applause] >> trevor: you know, when we talk about these spaces and we talk about these ideas, we talk about these conversations, there is no denying that twitter and many places like it have benefited from the diverse array of voices that have now been a part of the platform. you know, he wouldn't know what was happening on the ground the same way in iran were it not for twitter. you wouldn't know what was happening on the ground the same way in charlottesville were it not for twitter. it has become, as you said, it has the illusion of time as a public square but many people have used it to that effect.

i would love to know, from your perspective, as somebody who has seen you are in journey from general obscurity to now becoming someone whose voice is so respected and recognized, you write for "the new york times" as part of their op-ed. you are shaping people's opinions. how do you find a balance or how do you inspire people you teach to think critically about the world that they are living in? because half of the things we know are taught to us and then at some point, we have to decipher between what we have been taught is the truth and what is the truth or where the gray area exists. how do you begin that journey as a teacher or a learner because you are constantly learning? >> i think that is part of it. i try to always be a learner. it is really easy, i think, to develop and grow in your career and forget how overwhelming it is to learn something new for the first time. so i try to be an idiot as much as humanly possible. >> trevor: i love that. i do it all the time. >> you know, i enrolled in something, i take up something

that i am absolutely horrible at doing. because i want to feel how vulnerable it feels to learn. it is a very vulnerable space. so when i am feeling generous, i think that there is a not insignificant part of the american public that isn't so much afraid of the other as they are of being ignorant. and some people would rather be angry than stupid. >> trevor: interesting. >> so figuring it out is actually really hard. this is something i have learned as i have taught people. so there is a certain amount of vulnerability i think we have to share with each other, to say that just because i have achieved something in one part of the world or in one profession doesn't mean i know everything. now the challenge for us is that we have a culture that absolutely likes to turn every success story into a universal story of genius. so you founded facebook and now you can solve world hunger. as if those have anything to do

with each other. so that is a problem of the culture, but i don't think it has to be that way. and i actually think one of the good things about twitter has been how many people have been willing to model learning in public so that other people could see that it doesn't have to strip you of your status or your position, that learning can happen without you flailing about. i think i will miss out about twitter. >> trevor: because it's gone? >> eventually. listen, all social media ends. there will be something new obviously, but i don't know that anything else will be able to capture that. that was one of the best things about twitter. it was a space for people to see different kinds of genius, that you can be good in one domain, still learning in another domain, that you can risk it. it is something that i enjoyed doing personally. and i think that it was never

the intention. listen, people turned it into that. that is not what it was designed to do. >> trevor: is it because we innately want to do that as human beings? >> i have to believe that human beings are fundamentally curious. and social media is only popular because we are curious. we go there because we want to see. we are nosy! we want to learn about the world. so what it has done it has made it profitable. and it has made our curiosity politically polarized. but that doesn't mean that curiosity is bad. i actually think it is a thing that separates us from the rest of -- the animal kingdom, not only -- animals are good. >> trevor: they actually are pretty curious. >> apes, if they are lucky. but it does apparatus i think from like a brick wall. >> trevor: it does, indeed.

shade to all the bricks that have been thrown. i could talk to you for hours but that is why we have your books, that is why we have so many of your tweets, thank you so much for joining me on the show. [cheers and applause] thank you so much. one more time, tressie mcmillan cottom, everybody. we have to take a quick break. we will be right back after this. [cheers and applause] thank you again. [cheers and applause] if you run a small business, you need the most from every investment. that's why comcast business gives you more. more innovation... with our new gig-speed wi-fi, plus unlimited data. more speed... from the largest, fastest, reliable network... and more savings- up to 60% a year on comcast business mobile. all from the company that powers more businesses than any other provider.

get started with fast speeds and advanced security for $69.99 a month for 12 months. plus ask how to get up to a $750 prepaid card with qualifying internet. >> trevor: well, that's our show for tonight but before we go: this holiday season, consider supporting feeding america, the largest hunger-relief organization in the united states. they work to get nourishing food from farmers, manufacturers, and retailers to our neighbors, while addressing the root causes

of hunger. so if you can support them in their work, please donate at the link below. until next time, stay safe out there and remember: the robots can't take your job if you are already unemployed. now here it is, your "moment of zen." ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> i will sing with the carolers. >> fit right in. >> you do. >> i don't know this song. ♪ honey ♪ >> honey? [singing christmas carols] [laughter] ♪ ♪ - ♪ mtv ♪ - [whistling]

oh! ah! ah, damn it. sheriff's department! ding dong. [rings doorbell] sheriff's department. please don't report your doorbell camera crimes unless they're actually crimes next time, please. sheriff's department. hello, hello, hello? [rings doorbell] why? [r- whoo!ic]

♪ ♪ - ah! ♪ ♪ - ohh! [gunshot] - oh, shit! [yelping] ♪ ♪ [blows air horn] [gunfire] ♪ ♪ [screaming] - good morning, gang. - morning. - morning. - by a show of hands, who thinks trudy has something in her belly button right now? - i smell it. - well, jokes on you because it's a pez. - can i check it? - it is a pez. - how is it a joke on us? - how is it a joke on us, yeah. - because you made it, like, oh, there probably is something in there. well, i got there ahead of you thinking ahead of you and i specifically put a pez in my belly button before i came to work today. and the whole month before that just in case you did say that. so i have had a sweaty pez in my belly button