my god. erin, will you call 9-1-1 please? ok. who should i say is calling? erin. chea three. thead twa to bar. [gibberish] paunch and loud. paunch says to bartender. how's gonna da? barte says to him four tha pa. everybody tha, everybody tha, everybody tha. draw shweb. yes. draw shweb. drive safe. yeah. i get it. [sneeze] - [babble] - ok. we're going to work on walk out to a shweb. ♪ ♪ >> announcer: from the most trusted journalists at comedy central... it's america's only source for news. this is "the daily show" with your host, ronny chieng! ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause]

>> ronny: hey, welcome to "the daily show!" i'm ronny chieng. we got so much to talk about tonight. trump takes out the trash, the election turns into a gender war, and we send john leguizamo undercover to talk to latino voters. so let's get into "indecision 2024!" ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] in america, today was the environmental and public health disaster known as halloween, where kids dress up in single-use costumes and eat 40 pounds of sugar, because 500 years ago, people were scared of the dark or something. but it's not just kids dressing up in costumes. it's also grown men. >> climbing aboard a garbage truck in green bay that had his campaign's logo on the side -- >> how do you like my garbage truck? this truck is in honor of kamala and joe biden. >> former president trump embraced his latest political set piece, as he amped up

his attacks on democrats. >> 250 million people are not garbage. i can tell you who the real garbage is but we won't say that. >> ronny: okay, so you dressed up as a garbage man, because you say biden called your supporters garbage, and you're saying they're not garbage, but you are taking out the garbage, which is someone else, but you won't tell us who it is. and also no one should call anyone garbage, but you just did because you're the garbage man? so in other words, the perfect metaphor. by the way, for anyone thinking of dressing up as trump for halloween, you got to be really careful at this point, because it's getting kinda close to blackface. you know what i mean? but you know what, it doesn't

matter how weird you look, or how stupid your metaphor is, or how badly you [bleep] it up, as long as you look great getting into that garbage truck. >> donald trump actually climbing -- i should say, stumbling -- into a garbage truck. >> ronny: nailed it. and to be fair, if joe biden did that, it would have broken every bone in his body. but look at how hard trump committed to the garbage thing. if only joe biden had been like, "all of trump's supporters always gargle their own piss." and he'd be like, "is that what you think? make america great again." i'll show!" now, i'm not a professional expert pundit, but i think it's very unlikely that this race will be decided by the war over garbage. because there is a much more important battle here: boobs versus balls. >> this presidential race could be a battle of the sexes. >> this election cycle, the

30-point gender gap between men and women is stark. with nbc news polling showing women supporting vice president harris by a 14-point margin. >> if harris wins, it'd be because women crawled over broken glass to break the glass ceiling. >> ronny: okay, so there was glass on the floor before they broke the glass ceiling? so then where did the broken glass come from if the ceiling is -- why is everyone in america so bad at metaphors? look, i don't know why trump does badly with women. okay, i mean, yeah, sure, he shredded their reproductive rights or whatever but he's only been accused of groping 26 of them. oh, what's that? there was a new one last week? okay, 27. sorry, what? there was a new one yesterday? well, i can understand why no one heard about it, okay?

the media had a big garbage truck story to cover. but trump isn't giving up. he made another pitch to women last night in a way that wasn't creepy at all. >> my people told me about four weeks ago, i always say, "no, i want to protect the people, i want to protect the women of our country. i want to protect the women." "sir, please don't say that." "why?" they said, "we think it's -- we think it's very inappropriate for you to say." i say, "why?" i said, "well, i'm going to do it whether the women like it or not. i'm going to protect them." [boos] >> ronny: you know, there's a name for when you take care of a woman who doesn't want you to take care of her. it's called kidnapping and there is no situation where "whether you like it or not" is a good sales pitch. "unlimited shrimp... whether you like it or not." would be a pass from me. so trump's reaching out to women as successfully as he reached out to that garbage truck door.

meanwhile, kamala's supporters are trying to win even more female voters with a stealth campaign to sway hesitant women in conservative areas. >> sticky notes reminding women that their vote is secret have been popping up in women's bathrooms all over the country, thanks to a viral grassroots campaign by kamala harris supporters. >> this is a campaign to put these post-it notes in the bathrooms giving women the permission to vote for who they want to. so it says, "nobody knows who you vote for." so vote for who you want. vote harris for women's rights." >> how many of these have you made? >> we've made thousands. thousands and thousands. i saw it online and all the women in my area, they're all doing it. they're literally driving up to wisconsin to the truck stops just to do this. >> ronny: damn, that is the most wholesome reason to visit a truck stop bathroom. just imagine how disappointed you'd be seeing one of these coming out of a glory hole. but that's right, kamala but that's right, kamala

supporters think there are a lot of women who would vote for her if they knew their husbands or neighbors wouldn't find out, so they're going all the way into women's bathrooms to let them know. and you may laugh at that, but polls consistently show that the most important voting bloc in michigan is women on road trips who have diarrhea. and i guess this is an interesting idea, but is there any place left that we can be safe from political ads? i mean, a public bathroom is a sacred place, where we're not democrats or republicans. we're just americans who are hoping a handicap person doesn't need the handicap stall while i'm in there. i just don't know if this is going to work. i've never seen anything in a bathroom that's changed my opinion. "for a good time, call megan." "please wash hands." i'm not doing any of that. but if you're a woman who doesn't go to the bathroom -- and i know some women don't, because i've never seen my wife take a shit ever -- harris supporters have put out tv ads

reminding women with conservative husbands that their votes are a secret, too. >> your turn, honey. >> in the one place in america where women still have a right to choose, you can vote any way you want. and no one will ever know. >> did you make the right choice? >> sure did, honey. >> remember, what happens in the booth stays in the booth. >> ronny: did that stay in the booth? i mean, i don't know if it could be more obvious that something was going on with those women. if i was their husband, i'd be like, "you guys are either voting for kamala or you're having an affair. there's a lot of electricity here. and i'm scared but i'm also turned on." and if all that extra long staring wasn't suspicious enough, there's another ad where the women are even more obvious! >> still voting for him?

>> hell yeah. >> what about your wife? >> she's doesn't like him but she's voting for him. >> same with mine. ♪ ♪ >> ronny: guys! you got to stop mouthing "kamala!" this is supposed to be a secret conspiracy! "we're voting for kamala, right?" "i said, are we voting for kamala?" "yes, but we have to keep it a secret, or our sinister husbands will murder us!" "hey, is it weird they're, like, 50 years older than us?" seriously, look at those husbands. you don't have to mouth it. i'm pretty sure they won't listen even if you talk at full volume. maybe i'm just being a heroic feminist here, as usual, but isn't it a little sexist for these ads to suggest that women are morons who don't know how to

vote? but i guess it's okay because they're also saying that men are morons who don't know how to vote. >> come on, boys. let's make america great again. it's your turn, buddy. >> before you cast your vote in this election, think about how it'll impact the people you care about the most. >> daddy. >> remember, you can vote any way you want and no one will ever know. >> do your patriotic duty? >> you bet i did, brother. >> what happens in the booth stays in the booth. >> ronny: okay, so the women are secretly voting for kamala, but the men who are threatening them are also voting for kamala? it's going to be so romantic when they all find out. it's going to be like that stupid "pina colada" song. and by the way, why is everybody in these ads voting in groups? i've never seen a group of bros vote together like they're heading to a tailgate. and also, this guy walked into the voting room with his bros

but then walked out with his family? what the [bleep] is happening? i get the women ad, but this ad is ridiculous. no real man is going to prioritize his wife and daughter over a guy with his own customized garbage truck. you know how cool that is? you can't beat that! now if you're worried that trying to secretly coordinate votes with eye contact might be too confusing, here's a new ad that will clarify absolutely nothing. ♪ ♪ >> all right, everyone. time to vote. >> let's all thought the right way, if you know what i mean. >> of course, honey. >> remember that this election, you can vote for whoever you want, and no one has to know. no one at all. ♪ ♪ your vote is secret from everyone. which means the choice is totally up to you. ♪ ♪

this election, let's celebrate our power to choose. ♪ ♪ so cast your ballot with confidence. because this ballot is all yo yours. the secret ballot is what makes america america. it is as american as apple pie. so this election day, remember, don't get distracted by nodding. focus on making your voice heard. >> ready to turn in your ballot, honey? >> sure ampyra. >> polls are closed! you been standing there nodding for 13 hours. ♪ ♪ stop it! >> all right. thank you for your time. [cheers and applause] >> ronny: when we come back, john leguizamo will find out what latino voters are thinking. so don't go away! [cheers and applause]

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[cheers and applause] >> ronny: hey, welcome back to "the daily show." donald trump is doing surprisingly well with latino voters in the polls this year. but why? john leguizamo decided to find out. >> election day is almost upon us and democrats are concerned about donald trump's surprising support in the latino community. >> a new poll has trump gaining ground with latino voters.

>> vice president harris struggling to hold onto latino voters. >> so i assembled a panel of undecided and trump curious latino voters to see why they haven't been turned off by inflammatory statements like... >> kamala has imported a an army of illegal alien gang members and migrant criminals from prisons and jails. >> trump's rhetoric about latinos has darkened into a 12 hour chocolate mole, but does that matter to these voters? i disguised myself as a representative of a pro trump super pac. the plan, tell them i was trying to better understand how trump could appeal to latino voters while confronting them with trump's racism first hand. can i see everybody's i.d. real quick and see if you are a real citizen? >> i was born in california. >> but where are you really from? come from? >> my parents are from el salvador. >> el salvador, mexico. okay. what do you like about donald trump? >> he's not evasive. it's pretty clear. this is someone that has been at

the forefront for a very long time, speaking his mind. >> when he was on the government, the economy was better than we have it right now. that is the only part that i like. >> on the surface, they seem to like trump but as we went deeper, i gave them the tools to express themselves in a more nuanced manner. >> i'm going to name an issue and you are going to raise either one or two or three chili to signify how spicy the issue is for you. okay? the economy. wow, damn, three chili's. that is spicy, spicy. health care. not as spicy. still spicy. army janitors. >> you mean? >> giving weapons to janitors to protect the students if a shooter comes in. okay. no chilis on that. now that i knew the issues they cared about, it was time to see if there were any latino celebrity endorsements that might capture their vote.

>> bad bunny. >> no. >> comcome on, bad bunny! >> no. >> john leguizamo? >> welcome a [bleep] you too them. now it is time for the moment of truth. let's see if witnessing donald trump's rhetoric firsthand makes them want to vote for him more or less. >> on my first day back in the white house, i will terminate every open borders policy of the biden administration, stop the invasion of our southern border, and begin the largest domestic deportation operation in american history. >> that is an excellent way to fix the very, very severe problem. >> what do you love about deportation? >> you have criminals, they should all be removed. >> do you think they should deport american criminals too? >> depart american criminals to wear? >> what is your least favorite south american country? >> cuba. if he is saying immigration is a problem, it is like, you have a leak in your house.

you have to turn it off, the water supply. fix it, then turned it on. maybe that is what he is trying to do. let's close down the border for a while. >> but who would you call to fix your leak if all the latinos are gone? >> then nasty partition didn't seem to turn people off. let's try something else. >> no control whatsoever, nobody has any idea where these people come from. we know they come from prisons, we know they come for mental institutions, and seen a silence, we know they are terrorist. it is poisoning the blood of our country. >> so what do you think of the language of these using? >> it is poison. that is his last word. that is what it is. >> you are saying it is a little too hitlerish, instead of poisoning the blood, may be spraining the ankle of america, giving america gastrointestinal discomfort? >> making up words. >> what about if he said ruining the testicles of america? >> great. so people don't have to look to hitler stuff. what about this clip? >> how about allowing people to come to an open border, 13,000

of which were murderers, and they are now happily living in the united states? you know, now a murderer, i believe this, it is in their genes, and we got a lot of bad genes in our country right now. >> i think there's better words or can be used. we all misspeak sometimes be. >> what i love about trump, he misspeaks from the heart. >> he has a good heart. >> well said. >> it is stereotyping latinos. it is stereotyping immigrants. and the more that you demonize people, it doesn't bring us together. >> so you definitely don't have the murder gene. okay, don't speak spanish because it is not nice. which presidential candidate do you think treats latinos most like caricatures? i will see a name if you agree, scream aribe. donald trump. you clearly think that trump

portrays the latino population in an accurate and nuanced manner. >> no. >> then why did you scream i? >> the question that i'm listening to are about, as you see this, what do you think? i would rather not see that. >> so if you don't show these clips of him because they make you not want to vote for him? >> that is exactly the reason why many who will tell you that they don't like him is because of what he says. >> now i understand. the only way trump is acceptable is if you never see or hear him. it seems like some of these people were finally coming around. but there was something that was still bugging me. >> do you want to change your answer for any one of the celebrity endorsements, may be too? >> no. >> you guys never saw it? she had last bushel? that was good. >> what did you like most about the last special? >> this setting. he did a school setting.

>> that was real clever. >> finally feeling like we made some progress. it was time to come clean. >> okay, i want to thank you for being here and for being so honest with me, but i have not been so honest with you. my name is not really ron cuzmano, but john leguizamo. >> oh, my gosh! [laughter] >> now that i have shown you all of these awful things about trump, does that change your vote? >> no. >> no. >> no. >> democracy. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> ronny: thank you, john! when we come back, the legendary connie chung will be joining me on the show, so don't go away. [cheers and applause]

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where ordering from little caesars unlocks awesome call of duty black ops 6 in-game rewards! roger. uhh my name is greg and greg wants you all to go get crazy puffs. pizza pizza [cheers and applause] >> ronny: hey, welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is a trailblazing, award-winning television journalist whose new memoir is called "connie." i used to watch her growing up as a kid. it is a huge honor for me to welcome her to the stage. it's connie chung! [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> thank you! wow.

wow. wow! >> ronny: thank you so much for coming on the show! >> well, thank you for having me, ronny. >> ronny: it is such an honor to meet you. i can't believe you know who i am. >> i don't really. [laughter] >> ronny: fair enough. >> no, no. i have watched you and i can't believe i'm sitting here with you, too. >> ronny: that is very kind. so how did you navigate the politics of the '70s newsrooms? these huge, towering figures of media, and you were often the only -- not only the only asian, but the only woman in the room a lot of times? there is this photo of you as the only asian person in this room full of smelly guys. this is exactly how i feel at "the daily show," to be honest. >> [laughs] >> ronny: how did you navigate the politics? >> it was kind of hard in many ways because i saw all around me were men. and i kind of just decided i would be a guy, too. i would walk like them, talk like them, even use the potty mouth that

they used. and i so convinced myself that i was a guy that when i would walk past a mirror, i would go -- because i was -- >> ronny: why am i an asian woman? >> ronny: what is really cool about the future is that there is a generation of connies in america, asian american girls who are the children of -- asian parents who grew up in your generation, who named their children connie. >> amazing. [cheers and applause] and there are untold numbers of babies that were named after me. >> ronny: how does it make you feel, that all these [bleep] people stole your name? >> i am just flabbergasted and honored. what happened was, there was this girl named connie wong. and she cold emailed me and said that she was named after me. i couldn't believe it. she said, when she moved with her parents from communist china to the midwest, she was only

three years old, and her parents said, we need to give you an american name. and she only knew what she saw on television and she said, connie or elmo. [laughs] when i went on this book tour, she thinks there are untold hundreds. i don't know how many. but i met six more, and i met a connie chung in drag. >> ronny: there you go. >> and she or he said that he can -- it takes him four hours to put his makeup on. and i said, dude, i can do mine in 15 minutes. >> ronny: i could talk you forever about this book. it's a great book. >> thank you. >> ronny: thank you so much for all that you do. [cheers and applause] you are the best. "connie" is available now! connie chung! [cheers and applause] we'll take a quick break. we'll be right back after this. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause]

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>> sorry. ♪ it seems today that all you see ♪ ♪ is violence in movies and sex on tv ♪ ♪ but where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ ♪ on which we used to rely? ♪ ♪ lucky there's a family guy ♪ ♪ lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ ♪ all the things that make us ♪ ♪ laugh and cry ♪ ♪ he's... a... fam... ily... guy ♪ peter, i need you to take chris and meg to school. today's the day i finally kill that squirrel that's been eating our tomatoes. try to get, like, eight of them this time. i want to make bruschetta. oh, can't the kids just walk? you know i like to watch two full movies before i go to work. no, peter, they can't walk. it's three miles.

[sighs] fine, i'll take them. but you better keep those goggles 'cause i'm gonna put them to good use tonight. [power saw buzzing loudly] once the floor is full of sawdust, we can eat peanuts in here. dad, are you sure it's okay that we took brian's car? yeah, it's his own fault. he's the one who keeps his key in the visor like a carefree hillbilly. okay, everybody out. i don't want the cool kids to know i'm your dad. hey, chris. guess who i just scored as my date to the homecoming dance. -vice principal mcguire. -really? yeah, her husband just died of als, so she is ready to get at it. hey there, strong guy. not now, brenda! she says i have the body of a 50-year-old before it gets als. so who are you gonna go with? i was thinking of asking kara morris. why don't you ask her now? her locker's right over there. um... y-- uh, yeah, okay.