and wonder where our clothes are for the next two days. how was your trip, father? we've prepared a song for you. nope. oh, boy, it's nice to be home. sure is, lois. now, shush. tv. television? how pathetic. yeah. you know where the most interesting stuff is, dad? the human hat. [tv announcer] we now return to police chases... no, thank you, we are a screen-free family. ...that end in fire. [bleep] that's awesome! [sirens wailing] [groans] nobody look at him, and maybe he'll just leave. good job, people. >> announcer: from the most trusted journalists at comedy central... it's america's only source for news. this is "the daily show" with your host, desi lydic! ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause]

>> desi: welcome to "the daily show!" i'm desi lydic. we've got so much to talk about tonight. mcdonald's takes diversity off the menu, facebook tries to friend maga, and uh-oh, someone bought donald trump a globe! so let's get into it with our continuing coverage of "trump 2.0: coming for the white house." ♪ ♪ >> i'm gonna come. >> desi: when donald trump won in november, it was largely on the promise of improving the everyday lives of american people -- from fixing inflation after it was already fixed to fighting the nationwide crime wave that he made up. and today, in a press conference from mar-a-lago, trump announced one of those common sense kitchen table policies that americans have been waiting for. no >> we're going to be changing the name of the gulf of mexico

to the gulf of america. >> desi: yeah, let's do that. why the hell not! we've been so concerned about all the scary things trump's going to do, we forgot he's also going to do some really stupid things! i guess "gulf of america" does have a ring to it. as in, "there was another horrific oil spill in the gulf of america!" but okay, fine, let's rename the gulf, i guess. now let's focus on the price of eggs! >> donald trump urging america's northern neighbor to, quote, merge with the u.s., saying many people in canada love being the 51st state. >> canada and the united states, that would be really something. you get rid of the artificially drawn line and you take a look at what that looks like. >> desi: what? that would go all the way from the arctic down to the

gulf of america! this is insane. canada can't become part of america! that's the country i pretend to be from when i'm traveling abroad! why does trump want canada so much? when he hears that canadians "love pouring gravy on their poutine," he knows they're not talking about... you know... by the way, this isn't the first time he mentioned this. he's been tweeting about making canada the 51st state for months now. side note, i'm impressed that he currently knows there are 50 states. but surely canada's not going to just take this! prime minister trudeau, tell' em no what's up! >> i intend to resign as party leader, as prime minister. no >> desi: goddamn it. goddamn it. well, welcome to the united states, canada. locker rooms are over there,

our wi-fi password is hawktuah-69-420, and you pay for healthcare now! no but no, trudeau didn't resign just to make it easier for trump to take over canada. the fact is, he resigned because he's very unpopular now. no and if he ran again he'd have to face this guy, pierre polievre. he's the leader of the conservative party, and based on this interview, he's a pretty intimidating dude. no >> on the -- on the topic, i mean, in terms of your sort of strategy currently, you're obviously taking the populist no pathway. >> what does that mean? no >> well, appealing, appealing to people's more emotional levels, i would guess. i mean, certainly. >> what do you mean by that? give me an example. >> okay. a lot of people would, would say that you're simply taking a page out of the donald trump book. >> like, which people would say that? >> well, i'm sure a great many canadians, but -- >> like who? >> i don't know who, but, well -- >> well, you're the one who asked the question. so how -- you must know somebody.

>> desi: goddamn, that's a power move. i haven't seen someone dominated like this since i watched "babygirl." i'll tell you what, america's not getting canada from him. "get on your knees, you're our province now. good girl." but back to donald trump, who is now demanding to rename the gulf of mexico and take over canada. not to mention, a couple of weeks ago, trump expressed interest in taking over the panama canal, because why stop at just controlling birth canals? [audience reacts] but that's it, right? we can get back to the price of eggs? >> well, we need greenland for national security purposes. people really don't even know if denmark has any legal right to it. but if they do, they should give it up, because we need it for national security.

>> desi: of course we do. greenland is vital for our national security. it's the only way to stop santa claus from waltzing on down from the north pole and [bleep] our wives. and if you're wondering, "wait, trump keeps saying america's broke. how is he paying for greenland?" oh, he's not. >> donald trump said he might use military force to take control of the panama canal and greenland. >> can you assure the world that as you try to get control of these areas, you are not going to use military or economic coercion? >> no. i can't assure you on either of those two. >> desi: what? he just got elected and he's going to invade greenland? look, i'm no war expert. i'll leave decisions regarding our military to... alcoholic fox news hosts. but i'm almost certain invading greenland is insane. insane. at the very least it would have been nice to hear about this

during the campaign. you had time to tell a 10-minute story about arnold palmer's shower penis, but not one story about bombing greenland? that would have been good to know! for more on trump's efforts to expand america's borders, we go live to jordan klepper. [cheers and applause] jordan, what is going on? >> oh, i'll tell you what's going on: colonialism is back, baby! woo! the world is full of distant lands we can plunder and rename after america! we'll get zinc from greenland, or should i say, americaland. we'll get rubber from cambodia, which is probably over here somewhere, now cam-erica. and we'll get our sugar from south america, now america america.

>> desi: jordan, it's 2025. why would we bring colonialism back? >> come on, desi! the fancy hats alone are enough reason. [cheers and applause] >> desi: i hate to break it to you, but that hat looks stupid. >> the hat does not look stupid. you look stupid without a hat! and besides, america was at its finest when it was expanding. manifest destiny! the louisiana purchase! the oregon trail! the california pizza kitchen! it was so great for us! >> desi: yeah, but it won't be great for the countries we colonize. >> why not? think about all the gifts america has to offer a place like canada: roads, sanitation, syphilis. >> desi: canada already has all those things. >> they don't have my syphilis. >> desi: well, what if the canadians resist? >> [laughs] desi, they're canadians! don't make me laugh!

the breastplate chafes my nipples! >> desi: i don't know, jordan, superpowers have a habit of suffering defeats in harsh climates. >> name one. >> desi: napoleon in russia. >> name two. >> desi: hitler in russia. >> name three. >> desi: the british in afghanistan. >> name four. >> desi: the soviets in afghanistan. >> name five. >> desi: the americans in afghanistan. >> name six. >> desi: the americans in vietnam. >> stop naming things, desi! you're embarrassing me in front of my hat! >> desi: jordan klepper, everyone. [cheers and applause] when we come back, we find out what melania's new side hustle is. so don't go away. [cheers and applause]

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[cheers and applause] >> desi: welcome back to "the daily show." with a second trump term just weeks away, everyone's preparing in their own way. for example, i'm getting six iuds. bring it, sperm! but knowing how much trump lies, it's more important than ever for everyone to rededicate themselves to the pursuit of truth. >> facebook announced it is getting rid of fact checkers. >> desi: or that! guess you could just live your truth. that's right. facebook is ending fact checking, as mark zuckerberg announced, apparently while

entering his gen z era. >> the recent elections also feel like a cultural tipping point towards once again prioritizing speech. fact checkers have just been too politically biased and have destroyed more trust than they've created, especially in the u.s. >> desi: okay, first of all, is this just what mark zuckerberg looks like now? i guess someone got the kendrick lamar album for hanukkah. what is going on here? this is the worst fashion a white guy has tried to pull off since... oh, i guess two days ago. i got to say, though, saying, "we realized relying on facts was discriminating against our republican users" is kind of a big diss to conservatives. it's like saying "sorry, our no skidmark policy was singling out greg. all underwear stains are welcome." but facebook isn't the only corporation that's trying to get on trump's good side. even one that you'd assume he's already cool with. >> mcdonald's is the latest major company to roll back some

of its diversity, equity, and inclusion practices. the golden arches is not abandoning all diversity initiatives, but says it will retire specific goals, ending a supply chain dei pledge, pausing participation in surveys from external groups, and no longer setting what it calls representation targets. >> desi: this is disappointing coming from such a diverse company. they have a clown, an ex-con, people with hamburger heads, and, of course, the pansexual purple blob. and the thing is: mcdonald's doesn't need to do this! they are literally the one company that trump will never get mad at. they could name a dipping sauce in honor of hunter biden, and trump would still be nuggets-deep in that shit. nuggets-deep. but to everyone out there who cares about diversity in fast food, don't worry. to balance things out, five guys is now five guys and a queer latina woman.

[cheers and applause] but maybe no corporation is bending the knee to trump as hard as amazon. they've got a very special plan to win over the incoming president. and it's called "happy wife, happy life." >> amazon prime announced a new documentary on the incoming and former first lady melania trump. >> prime video will be giving a rare and behind the scenes look at one of president-elect trump's most trusted but also notoriously guarded advisors. >> desi: i'm sorry, "most trusted advisor?" did cnn also fire their fact checkers? what is she advising him on, exactly? "i advise you not to touch me." [cheers and applause] now, amazon is apparently paying

$40 million dollars just for the rights to this movie. and maybe you're thinking, "well, this sounds like a way to launder money to the trumps." uh-huh! but what director would want to attach their name to a project like that? >> it will be directed by brett ratner, which is the filmmaker's first major project since 2017. you might recall he was accused of sexual misconduct by numerous women and has denied those allegations. [boos] >> desi: mm-hmm. accused of sexual misconduct? does donald trump know he wasn't convicted? because that might be a deal breaker! but i'll tell you, amazon is really committing to this. based on this new ad that we definitely did not make up, this melania documentary is only the beginning. >> coming this spring, amazon is proud to announce its new, unbiased documentary "melania: the greatest first-est lady" appeared from legendary and

totally innocent director brett ratner, melania will provide an in-depth look at this bewitching role model. but that is not all. stay tuned for many more objective documentaries, like "don jr.: the genie is sex god who is penis is fantastic," directed by jared vogel. "eric trump: the new leonardo da vinci," directed by harvey weinstein. and j.d. vance, the man who is farts should be sold as cologne, executive produced by jeffrey epstein's plane and featuring an original song by r. kelly. did he, kevin spacey, and pepe le pew. we know you will give these titles a "hashtag me to thumbs up. that is why they'll be automatically downloaded to your account and cannot be erased. amazon prime video. it is not propaganda. it is prime. [cheers and applause] >> desi: when we come back, the director of "babygirl" will be joining me on the show. so don't go away. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪

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[cheers and applause] >> desi: congratulations on the film. it opened christmas day. >> yes. >> desi: it's a wonderful life for horny women everywhere. it is a beautiful film. i got to go see a screening last month and you were there. you introduced the movie and you introduced the movie with a question. you said, every good story starts with a question. and this film's question is, can you love even the most shameful parts of yourself? how did you go -- well, first of all, as someone who has binge watched 11 seasons of "real housewives of new york," i can answer that for you. it is yes. yes, you can. yes, you can. how did you go from asking yourself that question to building this beautiful, vulnerable, raw story? >> i knew also i wanted to make something about my sort of

quest. i always want to be normal. that's my whole thing. there's a sentence in the movie, a line that nicole kidman says to her husband, antonio banderas. she goes, i just want to be normal. i want to be the woman you like. i want to be what you like. my movie is sort of a letter to myself to kind of encourage myself to become more unapologetically my authentic self. without shame. [cheers and applause] >> desi: yes! >> but it's very important, i also wanted it to be funny. i really wanted it to be funny because i think humor is what connects all of us, and i just -- [cheers and applause] >> desi: yes! >> and i just thought, i wanted to make a big, american movie. i come from amsterdam, from a very small country. and so i didn't want to make a small movie about female desire. i wanted to make a big, fun movie. i think because of my great

actors, we hopefully succeeded. >> desi: oh, you did. you absolutely fulfilled that desire to make it -- there were laugh out loud moments. it was fascinating, it was exciting, it was tense. nicole kidman stars in this movie. the legendary nicole kidman. [applause] i love the way that you played with humor. you say that this film, that it was marketed as a psychological erotic thriller, but that you call it a comedy of manners. >> yes, i do. i also think we play with the thriller tropes and i love the sexual thrillers of the '90s, "fatal attraction," "unfaithful," "basic instinct." i love all of them, "nine and a half weeks." they just tended to sort of punish the lead who would be the cheater or the woman, the femme fatale, and i don't like to punish my characters. i just really love to be human about them and really show that we all are angels and devils. we all have a dark side. and if we accept the dark side and if we dare to look at it, we

can actually sort of befriend it. but if we suppress it and in that sense, my movie is a little bit of a cautionary tale, if you will, of what happens when you suppress that side of yourself. that is what i set out to do. the thriller aspect is definitely there, but in the second half of it, we kind of take it more into a human level so that hopefully people can relate to it. >> desi: these two characters -- it wasn't just romy who had her own journey, who had her own path. she was looking to accept these sort of shameful parts of herself, while the character of samuel was also trying to navigate something in his world, how to be a man in today's society. what does masculinity look like? what does consent look like? were these all things that you are plotting out in the story or did they develop later as you started rehearsing? >> absolutely. i wanted to make a comedy of manners about power, consent, sexuality, femininity, of course, is my priority. i am a woman so i write from the female gaze. i do anything from the female gaze. but the movie is just as much about masculinity.

we are not showing a classical story about a sub and a dom at all. they are both vulnerable, they are both interested in what is power, what is surrender, what is giving up control, what is taking control? they are both really in crisis. she is in a full on midlife crisis where she sees, the horizon is over there. what am i doing, where am i going? she thinks she can be this perfect creature if she does enough ice baths and botox and therapy, she can become a perfect woman and she has to accept through meeting samuel that she has to connect to her inner beast. but him as well, he is in a crisis in the sense that he is taking his first steps into the world as a man and he doesn't know how to behave. he doesn't know how to be around power or how to be around an older woman. i wanted to show that vulnerability. i think sexuality, to me, it can sometimes be very hot of course but it can also be very vulnerable and weird and clunky and uncomfortable and i wanted to show all of that because i think when you see that, you kind of relate to it and in the end, when it does work, then it

becomes way more sexy than if you just show this perfect hollywood fairy tale. i didn't want to do that. >> desi: yes, speaking of sexuality, one of the sexier scenes in the movie involved a full glass of milk. now nicole kidman was brave enough to bear it all in this movie. but i think that the bravest thing that she did was guzzle a glass of milk on camera. she drinks the whole thing. this was inspired from something that actually happened to you? >> yes, so i was playing hedda gabler one night in antwerp, and after that show -- because it is a huge role and have so much adrenaline, i didn't want to go to bed and all of my colleagues were boring and went to the hotel, so i went along to this cafe, as we sang in the netherlands, to this bar, i sat there and hundred or coke or something. >> desi: wait, bars are called cafes. >> yes, you go to a cafe. >> desi: i will start using that. honey, i'm just going to go to the cafe. i will leave work and go to the cafe.

i'll be right back. >> so i was in this cafe, ordering my diet coke and just couldn't sleep, so then this young man was sitting on the other end of the bar, a young actor that i knew of but i had never spoken to. suddenly, the waiter put a glass of milk, full milk in front of me and i was like, what? and then pointed at this young man. i thought it was so incredibly courageous. i thought it was so ballsy to do that and so as a reward, i drank the whole thing. it did make me -- it did make me nauseated. >> desi: it made you nauseous? >> nauseous, yeah. >> desi: as it would've. >> in the movie, of course, harris walks out of the bar -- harris dickinson who play samuel -- walks out of the bar and says in her ear "good girl." >> desi: yes, i remember it quite well. >> unfortunately, this young belgian actor did not do that. he just walked out. >> desi: well, if he's watching now, maybe we can change that.

>> maybe next time. >> desi: we will rewrite history. one more question. i just have to ask you for some advice. we have a new group of interns starting today. do you have any advice for them? >> [laughs] no. no, no. i'm not going to go there with you. no advice. [laughter] >> desi: not today. [cheers and applause] congratulations. congratulations on the film. i am so happy for you. >> thank you. >> desi: thank you for being here. "babygirl" is in theaters nationwide. halina reijn. we're going to take a quick break, but we'll be right back after this. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ at harbor freight, we do business differently from the other guys. we design and test our own tools

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[cheers and applause] >> desi: that's our show for tonight. now here it is, your "moment of zen." >> so i thought it might be fun for us to do this again. for us to do this again. >> sorry. ♪ is violence in movies and sex on tv ♪

♪ but where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ ♪ on which we used to rely? ♪ ♪ lucky there's a family guy ♪ ♪ lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪ ♪ all the things that make us ♪ ♪ laugh and cry ♪ ♪ he's... a... fam... ily... guy! ♪ attention, everyone, mail call! meg-- teen people; chris-- amazing spiderman; lois-- redbook; world war ii army guy-- a letter from your gal. (laughter, catcalls) open that one up, buddy. all right, at ease, at ease. "dear willy, it's been awful lonesome since you've been away." hey, you hear that, fellas? she misses me! (good-natured ribbing) stewie: you're all wet. hey, check this out. we got invited to a party. "peter griffin, you and your family are cordially invited to a gala dinner in your honor at rocky point manor." well, who's the invitation from?

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