with morris feldstein. but first we have to have a pop quiz on yiddish. [laughter] do you know, what sourus is what john boehner had yesterday at the swearing in when 22 of his members tried to bail on him. it is trouble or aggravation it begins with that word. that is what morris feldstein he spent his entire life to avoid thought of as he sat beside the room. shooting on kong pao chicken his wife just ask him to plan on watching the mets tonight? >> host: was planning to a

less you want to watch something else. they're playing the braves and said he detected the possibility in hope they that the only sound would be the of kung pao between his cheeks ted drumming of herve rebels against the table god had implanted with the pipes the sound just like the well a fourth tornado warning or police siren before herb breaking in the white foam. he never did anything wrong but his idea of a major problem he wants to watch a picture for the new york mets ted is a difference

between them. let me continue with his dilemma of course, morris never gets to watch because she uses killed as a weapon so morris finds himself later watching cnn. he sat in the of lunger in 2004 it could have been any year since the war and terror was proclaimed with the same crescendo of music that unmistakable voice of the voice said james settle jones the voice of this is cnn. then pulitzer had the day's news. it is true. sunday august 1st, 2004. look it up. he broke said day's news

yesterday general the united states announcing the discovery of a terrorist plot the revealed critical intelligence with the war on terror and after that say that the sources the department of homeland security for an unnamed financial institutions to cite intelligence reports cnn is watching this story closely there is also an increased fighting and president bush was urged to create to woo new intelligence agencies of acronyms he would never remember with a current federal apple -- alphabet soup aside up to the task to protect the homeland then he promised to be back after commercials about depression medication.

then it got worse isn't this better than the baseball game? he could not understand why anyone in would but he said yes now let's shift ahead introduced to dick cheney as i was introduced. you although vice president jaime? after the release the report on torture just when you thought it was safe he's back. to say it is so good i would do it all over again. so i paid to my own picture. i have the character in the book named pruitt is from

responsibility the adviser to homeland security secretary tom ridge and he is the liaison if you read former homeland security secretary book he acknowledges there is pressure on him at times and did not always feel those facts narrated so he derives he felt he shall paid in his stomach and in his side about to meet with vice president jayvee -- j.d. that was the bond that it hurt them to see each other.

[laughter] pruitt alliant -- arrives in the white house side describe what is behind the scenes now he drives and the vice president's office it is smaller and more functional unless they saw of the office the better the couch's faced each other in the chair was reserved for the vice president. his favorite photograph from the 2000 election was prominently displayed on the table there was president bush wrapping his arms around his running mate. that was the afternoon that cheney had of the committee announced the search was over and he found himself. remember that? the was in church of the committee and he said why not be? he looked up off the bridge

of his nose what you have this morning? he says nothing since last night since you asked. said he would cutback what about that report that i sent you? pruitt says the florida threat? we checked it out for creatures out it is quaker's planning a war protest. so. >> quakers. elderly quakers. nonviolent. kumbaya got. those the protests of day off. >> is a that a contradiction of terms? isn't that suspicious? also planning a peaceful protest engaged leave the

desk where. goes to the freeze dried also grinding he knew he had to shift gears as well. [laughter] then the final reading before your questions questions, concerns this supercomputer named nick. do you remember that great composite -- computer in space odyssey? they had him and i have and it. is a computer even before we even knew that the nsa had software and algorithms listening to our phone calls to read certain elements of our emails i have a super computer name to nic it is like startup -- "star trek"

little did i know i could've been revealing critical intelligence information. [laughter] where "scooter" libby and karl rove are driving to the national security agency. in the white house pool car. i read the opening to sentences then i will skip over to nic. "scooter" libby trajectory would do almost anything for his boss the vice president he would offer the half-truths' with the un truce even go to jail although he knew the prospect was not likely as cheney would always have his back. >> he was imprisoned.

>> but going for a long drive on the parkway going through the suburbs to test the limits of his patients the air conditioner fought against the heat and where are we going? i told you. undisclosed location in. where? if i told you where it would be disclosed claims senior adviser to the president for you can tell me. >> i cannot tell you. senior adviser outranks senior staff tactically that was the big debates of the administration that structure that he built who was out shrinking to -- to. >> then the mysterious dark parking garage and then there rival and go into an elevator and he produces the

fob then they go deeper and deeper into the earth than the elevator door opens with the underground undisclosed project of continuity of government. here is where he will ensure survival of the government. of the other hand the president would stay at home under attack. there was a small spate for food rations and emergency communications equipment. without the survival of the united states the entire works of rush limbaugh his favorite hunting rifle and the donors who would be prioritized with search and rescue as it emerges from the apocalypse. then to go through a narrow corridor this is what the

vice president one take you to see. he looked for a plastic card they entered a massive room to see endless rows encased in glass and metal. and technicians dressed in black uniforms drove casually down the alley has its price checking at the supermarket but he did not think he was in an undisclosed location but on the mother ship of another fleet. it is a reorganization of the intelligence community and his name is nic. right there in the bowels of the nsa nic knew everyone's

business even president bush could not be briefed you cannot find him in any federal budget with the three-point italicized type face in tree within the tabs of the department of agriculture office deputy secretary for public attrition office of the assistant secretary for school lunch programs division of compliance state and local outreach miscellaneous. the leadership was vaguely informed about nic just enough so they knew they were in the now without knowing anything. the last thing the country needed was the pesky judge to decide the right to privacy was more important than the nation's need for security. nic levels potent offenses in the arsenal. with tens of millions of lives in realtime to assess patterns of behavior with threats to the nation deal to mitt lawyer with the

insatiable curiosity and a ravenous and opportunity for data. and if that left as bad taste to create the slightest irritation nic would spit it out with the alert to law enforcement agencies. i have a paragraph on this in the captures the mood. >> to be in a country with wrecked overload everybody was suspicious or us suspect or a patriot or democrat. but the american vision forced the democracy to defeat the nazis to land a man on the moon was peeking through a window shades and looking over shoulders. if you think about it that is where they were in 2004.

i will make a final point the real open to questions. brad was talking about the profile in the style section i with been happy for you to read the entire thing. when i wrote this book it was partly a release, a party reflection, i had no idea. first of all, i didn't know it would be published but it was because of a coincidence i've literally stumbled literally stumbled into a literary agency. even when may agent token i thought no way then simon & schuster published it. even when they expected it in the house ethics committee approved it i thought mom will buy it. maybe a few other people. but it has done quite well. rob reiner who made one of

the greatest movies a spinal tap which gives you my sense of humor i of the talks with him he read the book doesn't interest to develop into a television miniseries. how cool is this site to meet with the president and fly on air force one to meet with kings and queens and prime ministers was sitting with mike stick -- was pretty cool. he wanted to change and i said you figure what to do with television so i'm having conversations with rob reiner "the washington post" -- post gave a favorable review of was very

gratified to be in the same review as others and i hesitate to say this in the independent bookstore but i will tell you there is the fairly popular online bookseller there ranks sales and several weeks ago aracaris several days ago i learned that we resisted the best-selling book category humor subcategory lot and the cords some subcategory by members of congress that live in long island. [laughter] thank-you. [applause] we will take your questions. >> good evening.

there was a reference to your father speaking to dick cheney can you tell us about that? you cannot tell everything. >> not without a therapist. i dedicated the book to the vice president and to my father who did not care for the man. my dad was a hard core democrats lost him two years ago to long cancer. we lost him in august before the presidential election. through his dying day he said i will stay alive to do know that barack obama get back and i will keep building until i know he is reelected. so hard core when i would do television and tied to a lot of fox news to the contentment or consternation

and i leave to left of economic social issues but i lean to the right with military issues and whenever i go on fox won the nit after the camera righetti angry e-mail from my father why are you doing that? even on other stations i did not raise you to be a conservative. i just talked the importance of democrats. [laughter] that was my dad. my dad in in 2008 they live in a conservative retirement community in phoenix arizona. my dad would walk around with a cap in 2004 that said dump bush in and say i had a great day. [laughter] i say that is a dangerous day.

don't do that. then in 2008 he would save you know, what is happening? they employ to shake my hand. [laughter] that was my dad. talking to my mom tonight teller the was coming here which is why i was laid on the phone with my jewish mother. she said dad is juggling up their. -- laughing up there. >> as i recall isn't aware bill griffith is from? >> i don't know but that is also where bill reilly we have a few celebrities coming out of levittown. douglas macarthur high-school in a community that they actually had book burnings in my community.

i believe the border for education may have considered but then decided it is cheaper to do douglas macarthur. >> so with your even stand in news stories how many lawyers. [laughter] if i've ever missing for more then three days call dick cheney. a wonderful question. the publisher simon & schuster assigned a lawyer to this to read every word most of the concerns were typical in tehran's of naming places with infringement with the publisher in be from the lawsuits. there were several cases they said are you sure you can talk about this?

there is nothing in any way, shape, or form or anything i heard that i should not report to there is no problem. dick cheney is a public figure and so am i. and washington needs to laugh at itself they'll laugh at us but there're no issues with their briefings in the meetings that i went to. now we have a very vigorous ethics process because they're not permitted to except advances and we have to be scrupulous to ensure we're not violating the house ethics rules of the was a separate process that was long as it should be in very detailed. >> i am also jewish from new york i was on the phone with

another in almost missed zero stowe affair probably in know each other. [laughter] my question is with a due administration have you noticed large-scale changes with their programs because of that? or do i hear the news wrong? >> with the exception of guantanamo i have not noticed large-scale changes of approach. there is a quotation in the book of president obama. of course, i could not explain that because he was not president but the scene where "scooter" libby and cheney but let me read it to you.

the was that an event with obama of where he said this and i wrote it down. this is after she learns about nic. >> he said but is this to stop spying on innocent american is accidentally? we take privacy rights very seriously we have checks and balances and safeguards this government does the spy on the american people. up the president said that and responding to a question about the nsa. any other questions or comments or criticisms? very good. >> you have another book in the works? >> before i finished the contract or submitted my

final manuscript i had another idea for a book that simon & schuster has accepted so it is going through the process the second is similar it is a parody from dc tentatively titled big guns of parity of the gun debate here in washington and it is said to the first premise is a very conservative house of representatives as a republican majority passes a law that mandates every american must donate gun. that if you were required to have health insurance you should be required to have

life-insurance. it is the debate inside congress. rand then he allowed four presidential waivers of the requirements for the children under the age of seven and on the do not fly this. -- list. wants to save children under seven are not required then why not 544? then nobody is required. so this crazy congress passes legislation to require that america must:a gun but meanwhile you have a progressive mayor and a

luxurious town in the hamptons where a local ordinance is passed to ban all guns in her village so it is the interplay of the small-town mayor who wants all guns banned but a national effort to require that all americans must own a gun. 40,000 words into which every word is written on this because the nature of my life does not allow me to find time on the computer so i had that idea and mr. to write to it live here. facie it righted on here. my staffing site of the most unfriendly boss. on cars or planes or trains or trying to woo get down

here all i do is pack at this so i apologize to a distaff but now they know when i was doing. i didn't even think about them. 40,000 words is the ethics committee approves it should be published in a year-and-a-half. >> do we have subsidies for guns? >> yes. tax credits for poor people. [laughter] tax credits for the gun makers to make sure they can make them. research and development grants to make sure we make the best. everything you would expect with the bill like this. every gun maker has something in this bill. is a loaded christmas tree. [laughter]

>> du type or dictate? >> fob no paul reiser? he is a comedian and a friend of mine and he has the blurb in the book. he read "the washington post" story and said did you dictate this? did you really use your thumbs i said i am bipartisan. but it was all done with my fingers. . .

i figured why do i need to spend time? i never saw myself as an author who is going to be published to need it technologies and i didn't have the quiet time that an author named. in congress there is no such thing as quiet particularly in this congress. there is a lot of screaming and yelling. [inaudible] >> i don't know if i'm allowed to endorse products on c-span. you know what, i will give it this endorsement. if you are going to write a book this is a really good product to write a book on.

>> sir it's a delight to hear you tonight. it's always nice to hear from accomplished novelist. >> thank you. >> it's hard to believe that you didn't have dashboard to wordsmith in college or earlier. could you say something about that? >> i was serious when i told you i had three wives ambitions. i wanted to play outfield for the mets except i couldn't pitch and i couldn't back and i couldn't catch so that was not going to happen. i always wanted to be a writer. i started writing in third grade grade, stories and i loved writing science fiction. i had done two books that were published before this, both anthologies of great speeches where he did short introductions of the speeches. and a preface. my staff will tell you as a member of congress i do all my own speeches. all my own stuff.

with the exception of constituent mail where i have a legislative correspondent come everything my office puts out in my name i write. it is a therapy. i do a twice a month column for "huffington post"." my last one was called kings of the hill, a satire, a parity of what we are going through on the hill. i've been published in "the new yorker." shouts and murmurs. i did a piece during the shutdown in the fiscal cliff debate so writing has always been and i'm serious about this -- in any tough job forget being a member of congress. any tough job, your job brad's work in the staff you have to have a release. some people have yoga and some people go to the gym and some people will watch an old black-and-white movie or the mets. my release was always just writing and it was always very