[laughter] that's not funny. one problem we are trying to solve is the high cost of health care in america. i am pleased that in our quest to reform the health-care system, have gained the support of the american medical association. it proves true, the old expression that it is easier to catch flies with honey. if money doesn't work, feel free to use an open palm and a swift downward movement. .

>> to all of those who say there is no place for empathy on the bench, i say this. i completely understand how you are feeling. [laughter] when you are upset, i am upset. [laughter] another difficult challenge is how to help our automakers to arrive in the 21st century. we tried a number of different approaches. tonight, i am announcing a new one, a plan passed on to me by a close friend and adviser, oprah winfrey. if each of you will look under your seat, you get a car company. you get a car company. fox, you get aig. [laughter] enjoy. [laughter]

i have said all along, i have no ambition to run an auto company. gm will rise or fall on the quality of its products. like the taut, athletic design of the new buick enclave. it is more than transportation. it is a modern drivers retreat. come on, work with me here. i have got cars to move here, people. [laughter] [applause] in all seriousness, despite the jokes i have told, i am here tonight because i appreciate all of the work that you do and the role that you play. you report the news as it happens and you cover history as it is made with a hand-held

camera or a microphone. you bring the truth to people and allow people to bring truth to the world. we are seeing that now as history is unfolding in the sounds and images of broadcasts from around over the last week. we have seen professional and citizen journalists act as a voice for those who want to be heard. bearing witness to the universal aspirations of democracy and freedom, often at great risk and sometimes with great sacrifice. they do it because the rest of us need to hear the stories that they tell. we have seen the same courageous reporting and iraq and afghanistan, congo, every dangerous corner of the world. everywhere, there is a story that needs to be told. these are changing times. you understand that better than anyone. one thing that will never change is the need to report the

news as it happens. wherever it happens. this is what you do. this is what will help us meet the challenges of our time. we are grateful to you for that. thank you. god bless you. god bless the united states of america. [applause] [applause] >> thank you, mr. president. thank you for being here with us tonight. now, it is time to enjoy the expertise of the most expert, john hodgman. he is that daily show's relative

expert with a vast range of knowledge -- from hermit crab racing, to secret world governments, and president of the united states. john is the author of the best- selling book, "more information than you require." please welcome him. [applause] >> much better. good evening. my name is john hodgman. i am a very famous television personality. thank you very much for having

me here this evening. thank you very much, mr. president, for warming them up. [laughter] it is entirely appropriate for me to be following the president of the united states. he cannot allow me for i am the most dynamic public speaker of our generation. you can feel the energy at this very moment. part of the reason i am the most dynamic public speaker, i have a compelling personal story. i was born of two worlds. my father was from massachusetts. my mother, from the city of philadelphia, which i believe is not even in the same stage. i grew up in massachusetts, your typical liberal town, but i did not have a limousine until i was 12. my parents came from working- class families. we had a modest home.

16 rooms, it is true. we devoted one-room solely so i could practice the clarinet and the viola. yes, that is right. strings and winds in the same room. i fused the two worlds, i made it happen but somehow through this strange hybrid upbringing, i still managed to obtain the american dream. i went on television. it can happen. even in this country, a middle aged round faced weak-chinned nerd can go on television, and i am living proof. the president has his own compelling personal story of some kind, so i have heard. you know what i am talking about. he is also born of two worlds.

that is why we look to him into this presidency for inspiration and for hope. hope, finally, that we can heal the great and shameful division that has plagued our nation for so long i am talking about the age-old conflict between chocks and marriage. it is the culture war of our time. -- the age-old conflict between jocks and nerds. when i speak of jocks, i am not speaking of athletes because they are people with beautiful skills and are greatly rewarded. they walked like giants across the earth. it is a question of philosophy. the last mission did not have a lot of athletes, but it was clearly a jock administration .

it was a question of philosophy. they proceeded with intense confidence and certainty that everything they did was correct. they probably hated anyone that used the word privileged as a verb. they were led by a cheerleader, obviously. most of the reporters in this room worked on their newspapers and were nerds. you on the questioners, the nitpickers. that is why you are so annoying sometimes. unlike the jocks that are great to be around. not so much you and me, i am afraid. radio talk-show hosts are jocks, blocggers are nerds.

radio shack hobby nerds. it is called winning them over, mr. president. speaking of supreme court nominees, anyone who believes they know the original intent of the framers of the constitution are obviously jocks because they hate hippies and they neglect the fact that the constitution is the most geeky document of all time. it was written by a monied, clique the bifocal-wearing nerds that thought god was an on caring dungeon master. -- was an uncaring dungeon master. didn't he say he was a nerd? to you people, i say shut up, nerds. this is not the time for bickering. this is an historic moment.

seated to my right is the person that some people say is the first merde president of the modern era. [applause] look at the evidence. it is said that he collected comic books as a child cou. he knows who the father is -- the father of superman is. he is apparently addicted to his name brand smartphone that i shall not name for contractual reasons. he is a writer. he writes books even when he doesn't have to. he speaks of restoring science and the concept of objective reality to the public square. it is an exciting time to be a nerd. there is talk about decriminalizing evolution. at this very moment, the fate

of iran is a strangely entwined with the sleep schedules of the geeks that making the servers at twitter and youtube. even the president seems to appreciate that we have reached a turning point in history, a revenge of the nerds. but we are nervous. more so than usual. we are wary, mr. president, i am sorry to say. are you really one of us? after all, despite his spockish calm and gangely frame, he is known to dabble in sports. not just bowling. [laughter] but the hard stuff, what they call baskets ball. he was seen looking at march-

brackets, and i was encouraged by this because i thought it was some form of obscure punctuation. i thought he was a type face nerd, my kind of people. i don't know what to believe anymore. the talk-show radio hosts say the president is in mystery. we have no proof that he is an american citizen or an earthling for that matter. [laughter] i think it is illegitimate question. is the president truly nerd core? or is it an act? like those prosthetic ears. you people to an amazing job but are not asking the right questions about his credentials. may i have the first slide?

there we go. this is a picture that i found on the internet, mr. president. for those of you listening on the radio, there is a picture of the president standing in front of a statute of superman. it was taken in illinois. is this a doctored photo or a real photo? did you know that statue was behind you? [laughter] i read on the internet that this photo was on your senate web site for a period of time? is that true? why is it not the home page of whitehouse.gov. are you ashamed? [laughter] next slide, i will move on. here we have that actor leonard nimoy, also a prosthetic ear enthusiast. you get along with him. he claimed that in chicago, he

flashed him the vulcan salute. is that true? oh, jeez. [cheers and applause] all right, you pass that one. what about this? i have read that as a child, you read spider-man comic books and "coning, the barbarian" comic books. which one was that? it was conan the barbarian. there is. do you happen to remember what the name of the god that conan the barbarian were shipped? >> you stumped me on that one. >> the answer is cron.

you don't remember that one? >> [inaudible] >> i see. have you and your family chosen a church in which to worship cron yet? [laughter] america wishes to know. there are some who claim that you are the [unintelligible] hello, nerds. [laughter] i am sure you know, mr. president, and the five people back there, i am referring to the novel "doomed" and their religious cult who were addicted to thgiants sandworms on dune. why, look. there is a giant sand were noor.

i know you know all of this. sir, is the name of the giant sand worms in the original language of dune? what is the machine to summon it? and what is the bomb that that the sand worm expunge this when it is drowned in water? i don't think about this. these are easy questions. if you are truly a nerd -- excuse me. [laughter] i have to let it seep in. i am sorry. i am sorry i lost control. i am sorry, mr. president. it is my fault.

you are clearly not the person we thought it would be. perhaps, it was wrong and impractical and unrealistic for us to lay such hopes up on new. the reality is, we are geeks. we are defined by our passions and by our open mindedness. i am nervous. i am nervous because this is a beginning. a beginning is a delicate time, and it is unsettling to realize that at the time that we are in is not a triumph. this is not the end of something happening. this is the beginning of a long journey. many of the categories we have used to define ourselves are evaporation. while that is exciting, it is also unsettling and scary. in many ways, talk-show radio hosts are correct. the president is a complete

mystery to me, but no more so than the future itself. i am obliged to embrace the future. i am happy to turn to the president and extent what i consider to be the most american of greetings. although we might not always agree, i will always be your friend. live long and prosper. thank you very much. [applause] >> thank you, john. please give a round of applause for john. [applause] thank you to president obama for being with us tonight.

we very much enjoyed having you here, being with us, spending the evening. thank you. [applause] please remain seated while the president departs the building. your dinner is served. we will be back in a minute. [captioning performed by national captioning institute] [captions copyright national cable satellite corp. 2009] >> president obama leaving the table there at the convention center in washington d.c. there are several other opportunities to see this event in its entirety. the airing will be online. >> tomorrow, babak yektafar,

editor and chief has the latest on efforts by the iranian government to quell protests. rick rosendall as buses and new law extending some benefits to same-sex partners of federal workers and the gay community reaction to the obama administration. nelson smith, president and ceo of the national alliance for public charter schools, and luis has a status report. live at 7:00 a.m. eastern on c- span. >> people don't want to think as roosevelt's conservation as a policy as much as a passion. he set aside almost 240 million acres of wild land. as people are talking about environmentalism, roosevelt is becoming the key figure to

understand because he was the only politician of his day that i absorbed darwin and understood biology and understood bird migratory patterns and mating habits of different animals. he actually did something. >> sunday, the first of two hours with douglas brinkley. sunday night at 8:00 on c-span. you can download the puck past. >> now, courtesy of iran's state-run press tv, ayatollah khamenei on results of last friday's election in iran. these are his first public remarks since the election delivered during friday prayers. this is about an hour 15 minutes. >> i recommend the respective

brothers and sisters who have attended the prayers here. i recommend them all to refrain from evil. what i am going to raise in this sermon is the issue of the election. which is the topic of the day in our country for the time being. there are three issues i want to address, three different groups. the first one is, i address the general public wherever they are in the country. i would like to mention some

points here at this point to you, respected people. there is one thing i want to address, the political candidates of the presidential election activists, and those who have been active in the process of the election as well. and also, i have something to tell the leaders of the world and in the western countries. some of the western countries, of course. and those leaders of some of the media that they are running. the first point which i am addressing, you, the respected people, i want to express my

appreciation and thanks to you people. i do not want to exaggerate while addressing my audience. but regarding the recent election, i should tell you, great people, no matter how i exaggerate, how much i exaggerate, it is still nothing. it does not really matter to exaggerate. you really have made a great accomplishment. the 10th presidential election was actually a great show in which people indicated their

feeling of responsibility to the destiny of our country. it was a great manifestation of people's participation in the affairs of their country. it detected very well -- it detected very well people's solidarity with their establishment. truly, anything like what you di in this country, i have no heard of any such thing in various such democracies and the world now, be it fabricated democracies or those that are really referred to as people's votes.

[chanting in foreign language] >> in the of islamic republic, apart from the referendum one year after the islamic revolution, in 1979, there is no other precedence like any election like the one you took part last friday. it is almost 85%, almost 40 million voters. you can see the role of the

[unintelligible] this is a sign of god's blessing to us. it is necessary to mention from the bible in my heart to address all of you people all across the nation. i feel humble in your presence. our young generation showed and proved they had the political understanding and insight. they are committed like the first iteration of the revolution, that they have this recommitment of the first generation of the revolution. the difference is during the revolution days, in the heat of

the revolution, all hearts were excited. during the war, they acted in a different way. these days, this understanding, this inside that you can see, you can see the same failing and fervor and enthusiasm these days. this is nothing to be ignored. this must be reckoned with. there is a difference of opinions and taste. some people support some principals or support is certain candidate, and others back another person and his words and his ideas, which is natural. you can see a collective commitment amid all this. among all ranks of people,