get freshness that won't fade away for 60 days. ahhh! with plugins lasting impressions. and yes, it's glade. s.c. johnson, a family company. tonight, get ready for the weekend with some friday-night fights. jon minus kate plus nancy grace. do the math on that one. >> that's why they're coming off -- >> that's why the show is coming to a stop. >> quit arguing and work on your marriage. >> exactly, exactly. >> wouldn't that be a better idea? and go back to a happy family? >> love her. then world record holder and television legend regis philbin talks about everything. and you may know him as the creator of an obscure little show. called "seinfeld" the very funny larry david joins me. all this and more tonight.

i had so much fun with him on wednesday i had to have him back for more. joining me now is actor, comedian and author, david alan grier. his new book is "barack like me." david, is barack like you? how is he like you? >> i hope not. i don't think he would have been elected president. it's a play on words. one of the things is i'm not barack obama. i couldn't make it through the press line of "dancing with the stars" without cursing people out. let alone a presidential press conference. >> he is extraordinary. >> yes. yes, he is absolutely -- >> the movie "guess who's coming to dinner?" sidney pottier had to have a ph.d., had to work for the u.n. and had to be so perfect in that film. i thought when obama was elected that is how perfect the black guy had to be in order to get elected. >> you're absolutely right. i remember one point during the election, and i -- how much time

and energy was spent by barack obama and his organization just proving to america, i'm just like you. there's nothing to fear. i have a wife. i have two kids. >> they still don't believe it. the birthers still believe he wasn't born in the united states. >> well, he wasn't. other than that, i still voted for him. >> he was born in hawaii. but people still think that he's a muslim instead of a -- they just make up stuff as they go along, you know? you made your case for america to vote for obama last year. let's look at this. >> all i got to say is white america, wake up. i'm talking about all the white folks who refuse to vote for a black man. i got news for you. he's not black. he's half black. he barely passes the brown paper bag test. >> what kind of studying do you have to do to pass that test? >> it's very simple. brown paper bag next to the skin. yes.

>> you know, comedians have trouble -- white comedians are having trouble making jokes about obama. do you think that they're scared that they're going to be construed as racist? >> i think for a while they were. definitely when i was doing "chocolate news." because you know, that was during the primary leading up to the election, and i know "the daily news," "snl," a lot of people were afraid to really say any jokes about him for fear of being branded racist. it seems to have loosened up now. >> he wasn't doing anything wrong. when george bush was in office, it was a bonanza. he was so -- he didn't read. he talked crazy. sarah palin is a bonanza for comedians. obama is not that funny, frankly. >> he's not. i think for america, we like presidents that stumble down stairs. >> we do. >> or smack their head into doors. >> gerald ford. >> that vomit in the laps of foreign dignitaries. that's -- you know what i'm saying?

>> sure, yeah. >> i don't think barack obama is going to go out like that yet. because he is so tight. his thing is so smooth. you have to find comedy from somewhere else. >> have you found anything yet? do you see a hook? >> i am looking very closely. >> we're relying in the comedy world on black comics to come up with the material. you and chris rock and -- >> i find a lot of comedy about him but it's more along the lines of what you saw in the "chocolate news." it's not -- i mean, i don't see a lot of comic flaws or things about his character that i can exploit and say, wow, you know how he blinks his eyes? no, he's not that guy. so you have to look a little harder. >> the jokes are about how perfect he is. >> yes. >> that's how boring it is to have a perfect president. >> how perfect i am. >> how perfect you are is even better. you are not that perfect. i read -- you did march with martin luther king. >> i did. >> that's a great thing. >> yes. >> in 1963. how old were you? you must have been a child. >> i was a little, little kid. i remember -- here's what it is. when martin luther king jr. came to detroit, it was his march on poverty. and he gave a preliminary

version of the "i have a dream speech," and he was invited to detroit to march by reverend c.l. franklin, aretha franklin's dad. >> oh. >> yeah, so my parents, our whole family marched whether i wanted to or not. you know? >> i see. >> i was a kid. i wanted to play ball. i wanted to play with my friends. i didn't want to put on church clothes and march all day with my parents. i was bribed with ice cream, but it was one of those situations where my mom said, look, this will be historic. >> sure. >> you will remember this. >> sure, any kid could go to play baseball. >> yes. >> that was an historic moment. on the other side of things, you also tried to join the black panthers when you were a teenager. >> yes, yes. >> that was kind of like the -- i mean, they were not exactly the most peaceful group. >> no, they weren't. but i mean, again, i was 15 -- >> martin luther king was nonviolent. the panthers, they were, and bobby seal incited to riot in the 1968 democratic convention. >> that was sexy back then. from '63 to by the time i was 15, i mean, to be revolutionary,

to talk that talk was sexy, was smooth, was cool. i couldn't wait to be, you know, a black panther. of course, they wouldn't let me join. in my book i talk about the death of the black man. when i was a kid, that's what we wanted to be. the death of the angry black man. i wanted to be link from mod squad with a big afro and telling white people, you know, forget you. i wanted to be that belligerent guy. because when we were kids, we were like, oh, that dude is cool. you know, you know? >> do you think you'll join the gray panthers? do you think that will be cool? >> probably. probably. >> your dad, your dad wrote a book called "black rage" in 1968. >> yes. >> your father's a writer. >> yeah, he wrote a couple of books and he's still militant after all these years. >> he still is? >> yeah. when i was kicked off of "dancing with the stars," he wrote me an e-mail and said, is it too early to call racism? do you think these white folks were jealous of a good looking

black man who went to yale? they couldn't take it. i was like, calm down. calm down, eldrid. don't -- don't -- >> i love that. >> he was absolutely ready to, you know, marshal up the troops. and do another march. >> what an interesting father you had. my father barely spoke to me. now, you also write you're cool with gay marriage. i thought that was interesting. because as a rule, the black community is not that cool with gay marriage. >> who told you that? >> there's something called the down low we all know about. >> we all watch that "oprah winfrey show." >> i don't think the black community is cool with homosexuality. tell me i'm wrong. tell me i'm wrong. >> i can't speak for the majority of the black community, but i'll tell you this. there's probably the contingency of the black community that's very churchgoing, that identify themselves as born-again christians, maybe they have a problem. i, myself, identify myself as a

heathen. i really don't care. >> you're a heathen? you don't care? >> listen, i'm getting a divorce now. if gay people want to get some of this, come get it. >> come get the divorce. >> they have a 50/50 shot at best for success, okay. >> i know. >> i personally don't want to wake up next to me in bed, okay? i want something softer, more beautiful, feminine. that's my personal taste. you know, if gay people -- >> your position is misery loves company. >> yes, yes. >> i totally appreciate that. >> i want to see gay couples stuck with their significant other at home depot with that faraway look in their eye "get me out of here." come on, go. >> the glazed deer in the headlights, "please, god, help me." yes, i know exactly. >> another indigo girls concert, no! yes, yes. >> david alan grier, thank you very much for coming on. >> you're welcome. >> it's really been a pleasure to see you. >> nice to see you. okay. back in just a minute with larry david.

i love this guy. he's a captain of the tv industry. he produced and co-created a little megahit called "seinfeld" and created a starring vehicle for himself. let's take a look. >> you know if there is anything i can do, you'll let me know. >> you know what? there is something you can do. >> what? >> yeah. you can come over today at 1:00 and visit with her. >> visit her? >> yeah. >> what are you kidding? >> what, you didn't mean it? >> of course not. >> joining me now from hbo's "curb your enthusiasm." my pal, larry david. welcome to the show, larry. >> thank you. >> does it feel like old times being here with me? >> in the sense that we worked together? >> yes. >> yes. i don't think we've ever said -- i've never sat across the desk from you. >> you've sat across the table because in 1987 when i was doing some show called "way off broadway" for lifetime, remember that? >> of course.

>> you were writing for me on the show. >> yes. >> you used to come over to my apartment with really a stack of notes and concepts. your mind was always filled with ideas. then we worked out the stuff and we would then order in and the show would pay for it and you would get so excited. they're going to pick up the check? they're going to pay for this? >> yeah. anything for free. you know, you'd take anything. i notice, now, like i have some stuff, you know, that i give away. you know, people in the office. nobody -- you can mention, like, a record from 1972 -- yeah, i'll take it. anything that's for free, people will just take. they don't discriminate. they don't care. >> they still want it. >> they want it, yes. >> but -- >> it's the best way to get rid of your garbage. really. >> the laughter that you hear is the staff, they hang around here. we have hank gallo and frank santopadre.

>> frank gallo is here? >> that's who's laughing. like gallo and santa padre. we call them the explorers. don't they sound like de gama and magellan. >> yes, yes. >> i want to show a little clip of you doing standup. >> no, come on. seriously. really? are you going to run this by me? >> come on, let's just show it. >> chuck scarborough, who's the -- he's like the anchorman. he's the kind of guy you want to play tennis with. he's such a nice guy, you can cheat the pants off of him, you know? it's no good chuck, it's out. he's not going to argue with you, this guy. >> what was it? i didn't even hear what i said. >> doesn't matter. doesn't matter what you said. >> what was i talking about? >> i can't believe they dug that up. >> what the hell is that? >> that's you, i guess. >> yeah. yeah. >> you look better now. i like you. you're so cute now. >> see, that's young larry. he resents that. yeah. you know, last night somebody came up to me and said, my god, you know, you look so much better in person than you do on tv. >> i hate that.

>> i said, what is that? is that supposed to be a compliment? what, i look like a dog on tv? i don't get that. >> fix you up for television, so you should look better. >> look better, yeah. >> you are a very -- i remember you from the old days of "catch a rising star." you were what you would call a temperamental comic. >> yes. temperamental. >> the comics always loved to come into the room and say, larry's getting up. everybody would look at their watches and see how long you'd last. >> they didn't know if i was going to have a breakdown on stage. yes. you didn't know what was going to happen. >> what would happen to you when you would get up there and didn't get the first laugh, let's say? >> i didn't? i don't like it -- i don't react well to adversity. i'm a baby. you know? really almost the way that john mcenroe used to be when he played tennis if a call went against him. "what, you -- what?" that's how i was. something went against me. if a person -- i could be doing great. if i saw one person talking

during the whole thing, i'd go "hey, hey, you!" "oh, what, you don't like this?" oh, look, you don't like this? >> then you'd walk off. then you'd leave. >> i can't do this. i'm getting out of here. >> so that stops your act. >> one time i actually -- i've done this story before. i went up on stage, it was "catch a rising star." went up on stage and looked at the audience and i went, i don't think so. >> just the way they looked. >> just the way they looked. >> was enough. >> and i left. yes. >> you didn't have any money in those days. >> no. >> you don't have cab fare. you were living in that dungeon for actors. >> yeah. the manhattan plaza. >> the manhattan plaza. now you have money. >> yes. >> very successful. you made a lot of money on "seinfeld." really a lot of money. not like my kind of money. your money. big money. >> let's not forget i got divorced. >> i know. california, she took half, didn't she? >> yeah.

>> that is outrageous. >> isn't that crazy? >> you are the one who's funny. you're the one who made all the money. why should she get half? i don't get that. you must have got hit with the economy a little bit, too, right? >> yeah. so, you know, i really don't have anything near what's -- >> what you had. >> reputed to have. >> that's so good. you can't live -- >> i'm not complaining. >> no, don't complain about it. in the new season of "curb" you have arranged for a "seinfeld" reunion. am i right? >> yes. >> okay. let's take a look. >> why would we do something like this? i mean, i remember you talking about whenever a sitcom does a reunion episode, you say, isn't this pathetic? >> i said pathetic. >> desperate. pathetic. >> desperate? >> when we would watch other shows and see them do reunion shows you would look and make that face, that very judgmental face of yours. >> who did you call first? did you call jerry first? >> jerry. >> yeah, and then who? >> people ask me that question and i'm not telling them.

>> why did you decide to do it now? the reunion? just like that? >> i had the idea a few years ago, and hurricane katrina came along and i thought of the idea about taking in the blacks, which became the ark for that season. that seemed topical at the time to coincide with katrina. i needed to exploit that tragedy any way i could. >> as only you could. >> as only i could. so then i did that. so i still have the idea. and i thought this season -- maybe, maybe we could do this. but it was a very ambitious thing to undertake, really. >> to get them all together. >> to get them all together and to get all those schedules down and get all the sets and all that and then write the shows. what were the shows going to be? it's one thing to say you want to do a reunion, but what's it going to be about? >> you're thinking all the time about those shows, aren't you?

always thinking about the plots. >> yes. >> everybody loves to work on "curb" because you don't have a script. they improvise and make it up as they go along, within your parameters. >> right. >> you haven't exactly asked me to be on, over the years. i'm just saying. >> i haven't exactly or haven't asked? >> exactly. you haven't asked. one of my spies told me -- >> we had suzy epsin on -- i thought that kind of -- >> we're the same person. one of my spies told me michael richards is in one of the things, something about him. i don't know what it is because the information is not out. could it be that hysterical craziness he went through saying the "n" word in that club? >> what about it? >> is the episode going to be about that? >> first of all, he's not just on one episode. >> one of the episodes. >> we will touch upon it, yes. we will touch upon it. yes. >> okay. let's talk a little. is there anything else you want to tell me about "curb?" any little secrets or any little little -- >> i have no secrets.

>> any little things that are going to happen? you're single now on the show. >> yes. "curb" larry is single and the real larry is single. >> yes. >> so we're seeing parallels, right, in the scripts? >> yeah. >> are you going to meet another woman? >> i have a couple of dates. >> in reality or on the show? >> no. hopefully -- hopefully i will have a couple of dates in reality. got my fingers crossed. i've been divorced two years. maybe one day i will have a date, but, no, on the show i have, you know, two episodes, two dating episodes. >> two dating episodes. you dating anyone in real life? >> presently, no. >> no? you're loose? >> yes. >> oh, wow, i'm putting that out right now for all you women. okay. >> yes. >> woody allen's -- >> i'm loose -- and promiscuous. >> my kind of guy. you came to the right place. >> i run the gamut. >> new york is filled with women who are loose and promiscuous so it's right for you, you should stay here. >> i've heard that for years. >> do you think they're more slutty in l.a. or new york?

>> i was part of the hippy generation, free love and all that. i kept going, where is it? i don't see anything. >> i missed it too, the whole sexual revolution. >> right. >> i am so resenting. >> just passed me by. >> when i come back i want to talk a little bit about your past. larry and i will be back. stick around.