as a front. hello, fox news. [laughter] [applause] i'm just getting. let's face it, fox, you'll miss me when i'm gone. [laughter] it will be harder to convince the american people that hillary was born in kenya. [laughter] [applause] a lot of us really are concerned about the weight the money is influencing our politics. i remember a super pack with me buying a marlboro 100s instead of regulars. [laughter] that it is 2014, washington is obsessed on the midterms. folks are saying that with my sagging poll numbers, my fellow democrats don't really want me campaigning with them.

i don't think that is true, although i did notice the other day that sasha needed a >> i understand america's teenage boys are signing up. [laughter] [applause] i will be focused on everyday americans.

just yesterday i read a heartbreaking letter. aroundetters from folks the country every day. this went got me to a virginia man was stuck in the same part-time job for years. there was no chance to get ahead. [laughter] [applause] i am feeling sorry, believe and not, for the speaker of the house. the house republicans give john boehner a harder time than they give me. [laughter] [applause]

i have not given up the idea of working with congress. in fact, to weeks ago, senator i have to say -- the signing ceremony was something special. [laughter] i know. washington seems more dysfunctional than ever. greg locke is gotten so bad in this town what did we do to pass -- pisst chris d so bad off chris christie so bad?

i am beginning to think they have a point. if you don't want to get paid for working, you should run for congress like everybody else. [laughter] [applause] there is one thing that keeps republicans busy. they have tried more than 50 times to reveal a bomber care. , more than 7 million people have signed up. [applause] how well does obamacare have to work before you don't want to repeal it? what if your yearly checkup came with tickets to a clipper's game.

not the donald sterling clippers, the opera clippers. what is it going to take? anyway, this year i have promised to use more executive actions to get things done without congress. it is called the imperial presidency. i have to show up every day at my office and do my job. we have a picture of this? [laughter] [applause] you would think they would appreciate a more assertive especially considering that the new conservative putin. is vladimir

i know it sounds crazy. they'll give those to just about anybody these days. it could happen. [laughter] [applause] rudy giuliani said putin is what you would call a leader. [laughter] [applause] look it up. they talk about it a lot. [laughter] that itrange to think have two and a half years left in this office. there are reminders that i only hold this job temporary.

[laughter] nows a long time between and 2016. you may have heard the other day that hillary clinton ducked issue at a press conference. [laughter] i love that picture. regardless of what happens, i am on my last campaign. i'm beginning to think about my legacy. a high you know that school is being named after me in chicago. rick. -- rick perry is doing the same thing in texas. take a look. [laughter] it means a lot to me.

i intend to enjoy all the free time that i will have. painting.bush took up it inspired me to take up own artistic side. i am sure we have a shot of this. maybe not. the joke does not work without the slide. [laughter] oh well. assume that it was funny. [laughter] joel?his happen to you , tonightous note reminds us that we are lucky to live in a country where reporters can give a head of state a hard time. then give him the chance to return the favor. we also know that not every

journalist is so fortunate. tonight,e celebrate our thoughts are with those in places like ukraine and afghanistan. everything, risk their lives to report the news. and fair for full access goes beyond the chance to ask a question. african-american might be barred from journalism school. effort, black editors and publishers began meeting. they met with the president himself. one made history, he

was not always welcomed by the other reporters, but he was welcomed by the president. i'm very happy to have you here. he made history. we are so proud of him and his family. [applause] for over 100 years, even as the white house correspondents association tells the story of progress, you have limited two. yes, radio television and internet reporters as well. sure that our

fundamental commitment to between the action -- interaction between those who govern it sustained. because this is the 100th recordedry, i actually an additional brief video thanking you for all your hard work. congratulations. >> what is going on? i was told this would work. this anybody know how to fix this? thank you. [laughter] do you have it? >> i got this. there.

>> here is to 100 more years. >> thank you very much, everybody.. bless you. [applause] [laughter] [laughter] [applause] >> ladies and gentlemen, now that you've had the warm-up, joel mchale. [laughter] [applause] >> here we go. i am the last person standing between you and your after party.

in just one hour and 15 minutes you will be walking out of here, all right? i'm going to break the record. strap in. good evening, mr. president. as paul ryan refers you, just another intercity my warty relying on the government to feed and house your family. [laughter] i am a big friend of president obama. i think he is one of the all-time great presidents, definitely in the top 50. [laughter] please explain that to jessica simpson. you are right, that was low. [applause] is -- it is amazing that you can bring it with fresh material. yours is whent of you said you would close the detention facility at guantánamo bay.

that was hilarious. still going. [laughter] i would like to take a moment to recognize the first lady. you are very kind to me and my family, especially when you showed us how to tear a phone book in half with your hands. [laughter] to thank thelike white house correspondents association for having me and not being able to book jimmy fallon. that is true. [laughter] it it has been a long night. i promise that tonight will be both amusing and over quickly like chris christie's presidential bid. risky. -- governor christie. [laughter] i deserve that. i agree on that one.

allow me to tell you a little bit about myself. my name is joel mchale. i am on a show called "community." [laughter] that is exactly what i thought. i also host a show called "the soup." attendance, e in e is a channel that you're deeply closeted gay son wants to watch. eat - e is also home to the cardassians. they are trying to screw black people. [laughter] now just the man. [laughter] it is an honor to be here tonight. i am tingling with excitement.

maybe that is just a bedbug. [laughter] i hope you all enjoyed your dinner. the freshly fred dragged off the ranch. stakes are very tasty once you pull off the tiny white hoods. [laughter] let the record show. my show is being broadcast on c-span. c-span is like one of those paranormal activity movies. it is grainy shots of empty rooms interrupted by shots of people that you pretty sure died a few years ago. [laughter] stay tuned, after the correspondents dinner, for in new c-span show, "so you think you can remain conscious." the 100th year of the

white house correspondents association. [applause] the cnn was only searching for the right brothers plane. [laughter] the correspondents dinner itself is a tradition dating back to 1920. back then, this event was only for men. there is a plaque in the lobby commemorating this as the location of the very first total sausage fest. [laughter] #total sausagefest. [laughter] 19e you'll find all nationalities contained within arianna huffington's accent. [laughter] it is a general and thrilled to be here in washington dc. city that started the whole crack smoking mayor craze. [laughter]

you guys were the first. i hope he is not here tonight. mayor say that toronto rob ford is a mess. he can't help it. he's like a bull and a crack pipe shop. canadat want to tell "relax, we already have a florida." [laughter] ted cruz propose a government shutdown. everyone else and congress decided to go along with this to get some time away from ted cruz. the key party is anti-socialism and anti-immigration. it makes sense that their hero is a cuban from canada. that one was poignant. in kiev president is tonight.

he thought this event was being held at the dulles airport applebee's. to a construction cone that he thinks is john boehner. [laughter] also true. [laughter] it is crazy to think that joe biden is only one heartbeat away from someone -- no one taking him seriously as president. [laughter] biden will likely be running for president in 2016. there is no obvious reason not to." [laughter] it is there, isn't it? i'm going to finish that thing. just bring me my hoagie. no, not that one. the fancy one.

here late clinton has a lot going for her. she is a natural leader. as our first female president, we could pay her 30% less. [laughter] that is a savings this country could use. who is with me? chelsea --oddle daughter chelsea is pregnant. we will have a sequel to "bad grandpa." question,ises the when a baby is born you give bill clinton a cigar? [laughter] you guys sound like you're on a roller coaster right now. they are all vowing to see who will win over the gop base.

jeb bush says he is speaking about running. another bush might be in the white house. for our everytime 10 years surprise party for iraq? [laughter] as it stands right now, the republican presidential nominee will either be jeb bush, rand bag of flour with ronald reagan's face drawn on it. [laughter] asking, will donald trump run again? that thing ondoes his head in the woods. p in the woods. speaking of digestive systems, chris christie is here. eerie,ctually here

tonight. -- forr, are a glutton punishment. they blocked the world george washington bridge. finally, a politician willing to stand up to america's commuter. jokes or sizeidge jokes? i know you like a combo platter. i get that. i am sorry for that joke. i did know -- did not know i was going to tell it. forke full responsibility it. whoever wrote it will be fired. i will be a man and own up to it. i will get to the bottom of how it happened. i was not aware it happened until just now. i am appointing a blue-ribbon

commission of me to investigate the joke that i just told. i assure you i will be dealt with. i just looked into it. it turns out i am not responsible for it. justice has been served. [laughter] [applause] he is going to kill me. [laughter] , you are not stranger to criticism eerie that nugent called you a subhuman mongrel. it is comments like that that makes us question whether we can wang dangy who wrote " sweet? seriously anymore. mcconnell said his number one priority was to get the

president out of office. congratulations on being just two years away from realizing your goal. [laughter] mr. president, your harshest critics have compared you to joseph stalin, adolf hitler, -- those comparisons are outrageous. you look way older than those guys. just because morgan freeman has played the president does not mean you have to act exactly like him. house dr. the white :hecks the white -- presidents for polyps and george clooney's head. [laughter] it is good to see that white house press secretary, jay carney, is here.

big night for j. i have not seen you this nervous since the president told him just go out there and tell them the website is broken. [laughter] that actually probably was a moment. [laughter] mr. president, you have to admit that you already have the launch of healthcare.gov a disaster. it was bad. i don't have an analogy. they say stuff like "i should not have eaten at sushi." that latest johnny depp movie really health care.gov at the box office. thanks to obamacare, or is the

president refers to it as me care, and millions of newly canred young americans visit the doctor's office and see what a print magazine actually looks like. [laughter] [applause] now, over 8 million people have signed up for obamacare. until yous impressive realize that -- there is a lot going on in the world right now. there is a madman who has had plastic surgery annexing small countries in eastern europe. what the hell is bruce jenner doing in crimea? do they get that show their? making a bigu are mistake with putin. you have to show a guy like that that you are just as crazy as he is.

he invades crimea, you invade cancun. russia takes back ukraine, america takes back texas. something to think about. [laughter] the new director of the secret service is here tonight. leadership, secret service agents can longer thatrt with prostitutes are too drunk to make it to the program. [laughter] i am sure she loves that. the director of national intelligence, james clapper, is here. put a face to the mysterious voice clearing its throat on the other end of the phone. that was weird. i have been watching a lot of cable news. i am a big fan of that lesbian on ms nbc.

yeah, ms nbc is a confusing place. al sharpton is there skinny guy. [laughter] cnn is desperately searching for something they have been missing for months -- their dignity. totally. [laughter] this point, cnn is like the radio shack in a strip mall. you don't know how it stayed in business as long. they just fired piers morgan. [laughter] [applause] thank you. ratedws is the highest network and cable news. [applause] it is all thanks to their key , the old people that

have tuned into fox news and have not yet been discovered. bill o'reilly is not here. they'll has another book coming out soon. he is making his ghost writers work around the clock. this event brings together both washington and hollywood. the relationship between washington and hollywood has been a long and fruitful one. you get tax credits for film and television production. in return, we bring much-needed entertainment to hard-working american cities like vancouver, toronto, and vancouver again. [laughter] bylywood helps america projecting a heroic image to the rest of the world. we have just released another movie about captain america, or ,s he is a known in china

captain who owes his $1.1 trillion. [laughter] look around. the cast of "the." "veep." the folks from dr. dynasty had a very challenging year. the grandfather on the grandfather on that show made homophobic and racist remarks. docs -- ducks. [laughter] "house of cards" has had great impact on washington. i have not seen a tour de force since.ance like that you can drop character any time.

spite thating to spoil the shocker on "house of cards." -- nancy pelosi's face almost changed expression. did you like that one, nancy? i would like to congratulate jared letter -- o on his oscar. who asked to be introduced to that hot chick from "dallas buyers club." has already had an impact on tonight's event. ofblocked all three attempts tim tivo to pass the dinner rolls. it he wanted to be here tonight, but could only move four yards at a time.

you're right. he is not here to defend himself. legendary actor robert deniro is here tonight. [applause] impression, deniro but i do an impression of robert yours agent. he'll do it. [laughter] mr. de niro, i am clearly beyond reproach. i will see you on the set of "spy kids five." this stone him and the founder of twitter, is here. so if you congressmen want to cut out the middleman, just show him your penis. not now. [laughter] those are my warm-up jokes.

i am kidding. i want to leave you tonight with a bit of a pep talk. america has seen her share of challenges, but as my agent told me when i booked an abc sitcom, "things could be worse." have you watch the news? not cnn, the real news. it is pretty bad in other places. by comparison, america is doing great. this year, after months of debate and controversy, we have achieved something that has impact the health of millions, we brought back wiki's. we are not the fattest country in the world, mexico is. don't worry, we will be the fattest country once everyone comes over here. [laughter] of i havecan sense

not been back to the village at so don't tell me you survive the drone strike. [laughter] america still has amazing technological innovations. google glasses hit the market. now we will know exactly who to punch in the face. [laughter] in america, we see gluten in peanuts as a threat. and other countries, gluten and peanuts are the names of warlords. is doing just fine. i know that? fourth movie a about trucks that turn into giant robots. why? there is still so much story left to tell. [laughter] jenna, everyone. this country is still number one. pastries, face computers, and robot trucks.

as to the economy and environment, we will get the next time. here is why america is the best country in the world. a guy like me can stand for the president, the press, and patrick duffy, and tell jokes without severe repercussions. instead of being shipped off to a good log, i am going to the vanity fair after party. this is america where everyone riot. a pusy this is one of the coolest things. thank you mr. president. thank you. viewer.u, c-span [laughter] [applause] [applause]

>> our coverage of the annual white house correspondents dinner continues as guests arrive. [indiscernible]

>> this is a live look inside the washington hilton just north of the white house. barbara walters and the crew from nbc and the today show among the media people there. many celebrities, as well. it is still about an hour and 20 minutes or so until the beginning of the program when the president arrives and the program begins. about 7:50 or so. the initial speaking program at 8:00. said to speaka is at 10:15. lots of celebrities, lots of politicians. a guy dressed up as uncle sam went by a short while ago. we are watching what you are seeing. there he is now, as a matter of fact.

... to is there. it is always the strangest, most eclectic crowd. the meyers who has hosted correspondents dinner in the past. mchalechale -- joel tweeting himself. he said is going to be painful. we spoke to him a couple of days ago as a gimmick to washington to get set for the dinner. the meaningout what of the dinner was outside of the capital. >> i think it is cool that it is allowing other folks into the world of politics and who cover politics. you see the number of people who are interested in it and things like that and i think that can be interesting. i hear a lot of people say the dinner is not what it used to be, but it is like, i don't know, the dinner used to only have meant, so that was way

different. it is obviously a lot more, thankfully, diverse now. it is an excuse for washington to let their hair down a little, as they say, especially barack obama. though it is hardly visible to see it let down. , it isep telling this like oscar weekend where people go out, have a good time and have fun and everybody is in the same room no matter what artie you are from. that is probably good. >> some journalists may say it is not great for journalists to be out partying and having a whatever,with -- >> relax, you idiots. there are too many big problems in the world than to worry if someone is going out to a party or not. when i hear stuff like that, i am just like, give me a break. go relax, go for a run, have a drink. go for a run and have a drink at the same time. >> good luck, break a leg. >> i will need it. prayer., just deep

that would be great. that is jewel mchale who you will hear tonight. the entire conversation available online at facebook.com/c-span. you also find it at c-span.org. he is talking about the issue some people have with a mixture of politicians and celebrities at this dinner. we spoke with new york times magazine correspondent mark leibovitz last year and asked him the very same question, what he thought of that whole issue. he raised the issue of media and celebrity. here's some of what he had to say. >> i think as we found out this all pretty is closely aligned. one of the things about washington that is unique, really since all the presidents men, journalists and d.c. have become more of a celebrity class than in other cities, which is

an odd thing. as a level of self congratulation and self celebration, and so forth, that somewhat at odds with the mood of the rest of it country and how people view the media and so forth. it is all very, it is very unique to this culture in some ways. i do think some people think it is odd that we now have about two dozen parties to celebrate the efforts of the washington media over a single weekend at a time when a lot of people are not happy with the performance of washington or the media. >> the new york times does not attend the correspondents dinner anymore, why is that? this is around 2007, baquet did not feel like it would be the right message to send to our readers to really be in such a chummy and festive

setting with the people we are covering. i think that is obviously a view that some hold, but not everyone. we don't pass judgment on those who do go. obviously, when i did used to go and i worked at another paper, i got a lot of work done. .here's lot of fun to be had it has been the philosophy of the paper for a number of years now. i don't see it changing, at least not this year. [indiscernible]

>> you saw attorney general eric holder and senator patrick leahy arriving. the annual white house correspondents dinner, the speaking portion begins in about an hour and 20 minutes at 8:00 eastern. we are watching comments on facebook and taking your tweets speakingn chat areas of the combination of celebrities and politicians, john f. kennedy junior magazine, it was devoted to the marriage of celebrity and politics. c-span interviewed the president of the white house correspondents association and he talked about the history of

the dinner and how the event has evolved over the years and why news outlets in her -- invite celebrities. exactly 100 years ago it was started by a small group of 11 white house reporters to protect their turf. president woodrow wilson was starting to read your press conferences and he didn't know how to pick who to attend. of standing committee correspondents in the congress that we will pick the reporters and the white house reporters said no, we will set up an association. to credential white house reporters. >> tell us about the history of the white house correspondents association dinner. >> it started in 1921. it started as a dinner with the white house staff and the reporters. . calvinmaller then

coolidge was the first president to come. we have had every president come since then. not every year. dinner has, this grown exponentially in size. about 2600 people now. obviously, our main celebrity is the president of the united states. for a kind and gracious. he has come every year since 1981. >> how has the dinner changed and evolved over the years? >> well, a number of ways. there's no smoking at the dinner. i was just talking to three or four of the most senior waiters at the hilton. they're been waiting at the head table for about 40 or 45 years. i asked them the same thing. one of the key things is, there is no smoking, drinking has changed. reporters used to drink many bottles of scotch, whiskey at every table. now there is a lot less tricking, more wine, and as the waiters tell me, a lot of fruit flavored drinks. we have hollywood celebrities. we have had hollywood celebrities before.

we have had waves. in the 40's we had multiple entertainers including frank sinatra and jimmy durante and bing crosby and animal act. we still have an entertainer. hollywood guests. barbra streisand came to her first dinner in 1962. with hundreds caller shipowners. the association only started sponsoring a scholarship about 20 years ago. now it is a big part of our evening. we use all the proceeds from the dinner to raise money for scholarships and we award them at the dinner. the winners get to meet the president heard this first lady particularly enjoys coming to hand them out. it is a high point of our evening. >>e dinner? >> if you are inviting the chairman of the senate foreign relations committee, in my world that is a celebrity. i'm lucky enough to sit at the head table with the president of the united states. to me, that is the biggest celebrity in the room and always is.

i assume you're talking about hollywood, those actors and actresses. some news organizations who are members come a particularly the tv networks, invite the people who work for the tv networks. >> guests continue to arrive there it we saw msnbc's al sharpton a moment ago. to washington hilton food and beverage manager gordon marr and got his perspective. >> how many years have you worked at the hilton? >> i'm on 34 years now. >> how many of these dinners have you seen? >> i am pretty sure i am on 34 this year. >> to any standout, looking back? >> i think probably the first year the president obama was in office. the seemed to become hollywood one. everyone seemed to be here. we have had celebrities for many many years. that first one was overwhelming

with a number of celebrities that decided they had to go through the kitchen because they didn't want to get stuck by the crowds. there are literally thousands of people here and everybody wants to meet everybody. we just had people walk into the kitchen -- walking through the kitchen all night long. it is difficult to keep the team getting a meal out when they see different celebrities walking through. [indiscernible]

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