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g it real.

[ recorded show playing in the background ] >> i don't know why yesterday we were right on call that was weird. and now we're back to normal. >> i know. ♪ >> announcer: stephanie miller -- ♪ if you didn't come to party, don't bother knocking on my door ♪ ♪ now we're going to party like it's 1999 ♪ >> we were doing what we normally do in the commercial break, and that is making fun of the eye that owns the show.

who is trying to kill me for the insurance money. he thinks we have no access to news services of any kind. >> yeah, it was like 12 hours after the news had come out. >> did you see this? >> oh, yes, thank you. >> the good new we have men on the room. >> we have jacki schechner who has pointed out that she is wearing a dress. so it technically pants-free friday. >> y'all never tell me when it's pants-free friday. i'm wearing culottes. [ laughter ] >> hi, john. >> i am totally blind here so i didn't get an idea of how beautiful you are. but i am trying to braille the

screen here. >> paul, please feel me up. >> i love you light there. >> thank you. >> question for the' collieses andic call nook this morning. there was a lawsuit filed in fort wayne indiana. the school was st. vincent depaul. i'm not sure if it was a grade school or high school but the teacher is suing because i guess originally one of these nuns or one of the other supervisors knew that they were trying to have some other children. and kept asking about it. are you going to have a second child? third child? and she seemed to indicate that one of the supervisors knew they were doing invitro fertilization. and then she was fired because of the teaching of the catholic

church. and my question is if you can't be devout unless you are popping them out, as you have talked about -- >> yeah. exactly. as someone who has just popped one out what do you say? >> it's a great question. and once again it's an example of the catholic church that have nothing to do with the scriptures. at in time did the bible say thou not wear a jimmy hat. this is a blessing. people can have a baby through invitro, then god bless them

it's a wonderful thing. and it's really sick that an organization that calls this unnatural, but helps protect child rape. >> i have another person for my personal comedy jesus. the guardian, the headlines written by a priest, was jesus gay? probably. he writes i preached on good friday that jesus's intimacy with john was gay. in all classic depictions of the last supper john is next to jesus very often his head resting on jesus's breasts. >> and there were other rumors that john was gay. >> jesus asked his mother to take john as her son, john becomes unmistakenly part of jesus's family. the idea he had a relationship

with mary magdalen is fiction, but even gay rights campaigners in the church have been reluctant to suggest it. i felt i was left no option but to suggest for the first time in think half of century of my priesthood that jesus could have been homo sexual. personal comedy jesus. >> yeah, there is nothing new. there was a vulgar adult film in the '70s about this very subject. and jesus did spend all of this time with 12 guys. there were three women too, but the guys who wrote the bible decided no knob, no job -- [ buzzer sounds ] >> oh. >> i'm translating from the

latin. there were a lot of rumors about the apostle john. it shows the crowd mocking him, suggesting maybe he is gay because he's not married and 30 years old. jesus loved everybody, and he blessed the gay union. we can prove that. >> all right. >> we loved the oh press ors, sinners -- >> hang on there is a part two. >> kurt cameron could very well like hiking in griffin park. [ buzzer sounds ] >> stephanie! >> that's a much more interesting question. >> 27 minutes after the hour more on this when we continue on the "stephanie miller show." ♪ jennifer granholm is politically

direct on current tv. >>the dominoes are starting to fall. (vo) granholm is live in the war room. >> what should women be doing? >> electing women to office. (vo) she's a political trailblazer. >>republicans of course didn't let facts get in the way of spin. >>do it, for america.

very, very excited about that and very proud of that. >>beltway politics from inside the loop. >>we tackle the big issues here in our nation's capital, around the country and around the globe. >>dc columnist and four time emmy winner bill press opens current's morning news block. >>we'll do our best to carry the flag from 6 to 9 every morning. >>liberal and proud of it.

♪ >> announcer: stephanie miller -- >> who is sexy as hell, but completely annoying. [ laughter ] >> it is the "stephanie miller show." aha, jim ward is bringing his harmonica to my pad later today. tonight, whatever. >> today. >> right. par-ta! >> at 11:00 in the morning. [ laughter ] >> sea breezes and wine coolers i'll have you know. >> bedtime 11:00 in the morning. >> 1-800-steph-1-2 the phone number toll free from anywhere. derek in minnesota writes are the floaters in our eye the result of all of the headaches in your eye from the right-wing.

>> listeners of the "stephanie miller show" have been known to suffer serious side effects including hall toe shus and exploding uvula syndrome. some settling may have occurred. seek immediate medical attention if ingested. [ applause ] >> all right. there we're covered. personal comedy jesus. he goes on to say, heterosexual, homosexual he could have been any of these. it would be so interpreted in any person today. although there's no tradition of celibacy, jesus could have chosen to refrain sexuality, but i see no theological need to.

all of that to be addressed on good friday i thought for pennanece -- >> pennanece. >> whatever. jesus is gay or straight it doesn't matter. spiritually what matters is there are many gay and lesbians who follow the church. anyway. [ applause ] >> i'm sure that is going to conjure up controversy. >> and we have the same thing that brings up that is jesus black? >> according to the koran. >> why would his family try to hide from the roman empire when he was a child in egypt. >> yeah.

>> he looked swedish -- >> he looked exactly like ted kneelly. [ laughter ] >> and sang just like him too. >> oh the ted kneely references. >> we got dave in l.a. in trouble with his wife. hello, dave. >> the other day didn't i hear you say that douche was the same as a shower in french. >> yes. >> i came home from the fire station and asked the wife if she would like to douche with me. >> oh, boy. >> and have five flower deliveries later she still won't get into bed with me. any suggestions.

>> more flowers. [ applause ] >> speaking of gay relationships, rick santorum is endorsing mitt romney. >> three things like i about him ahhhhh . . . >> he just released a statement. mitt romney, um has earned the republican presidential nomination through hard work um, how they hate each other is so funny. >> not meant to be ironic. disciplined messaging. >> he originally backed rick perry. so this is his third endorsement of the year. they looked like the actors in a just for men ad going horribly wrong. >> yes. ann and mitt met in grade

school. >> nice. quote the mischievous mitt would throw pebbles at ann as she road by on a horse. rich person foreplay. oh nice. >> she converted to mormonism as she had been pis ka pailian. the romneys never argue. >> sure. >> never? >> that always makes me suspect. in an interview with the boss globe in 1994 ann said she could count the number of arguments they had had on one finger. >> mitt does like to fire people. >> when mormons, marriage they are in like constant marriage

counseling. that sounds fun. she has become quite involved in dressage horse riding. just like every working couple mom. she competes at amateur and professional level events she is so into her hobby that son josh romney once got his father a horse mask. saying maybe she'll pay as much attention to you as the horse. [ laughter ] [ whacky comedy music ] >> that is funny for so many reasons, including in the fetish community. >> that is so weird. [ laughter ] >> oh, dear. >> hi, steph. >> i'm kind of cool because i'm trying to stay true to no pants friday. but it's cold in illinois.

>> it is cold. [ laughter ] >> remember when obama was going to be muslim by the end of his term. isn't the republican attack on women, aren't those laws quite close to how women [ inaudible ]. >> exactly. >> indeed. >> they like liberal muslims and conservative christians, but it's the right-wing muslims and right-wing christians that are causing all of these problems. >> thank you. the vice president joe biden yesterday with the big speech. >> president obama has said, and i quote now is the time to let our increased pressure sink in and to sustain the brood international coalition we have built. now is the time to heed the timeless advise from teddy roosevelt, speak softly and carry a big stick, end of quote. i promise you the president has a big stick. >> oh, boy. >> that is so funny.

come on. so funny. >> he said he has a backbone like a ramrod. >> yeah. >> wow. >> okay. >> all right. >> that is so funny. but it is brilliant. obama will go for the middle and you send out joe bide own to mobilize the base. >> the president's talk is just that talk. and i would add counterproductive talk. >> and joe biden yesterday. >> we know when the governor does venture a position it's a safe bet that he previously look or is about to take a completely opposite position. >> say it. say etch-a-sketch. one more time joe biden. >> no. >> are you having a brain-related event. okay. joe biden one more time. >> he starts with a profound a profound misunderstanding of the

responsibilities of a president and commander in chief. >> talking about romney there just fyi. >> yeah. >> let's go to will in pittsburgh. >> morning, mooks, momma. >> word. >> even though mitt romney is richer than i could never imagine to be. i'm starting to feel a little sorry for this guy. it's like hunting corn with a shotgun. [ laughter ] >> he is rick overton he is not gist a hal sparks replacement. >> that's right. >> he takes a forceful position and then five minutes later someone finds a video of him finding the exact opposite. >> i know. it is getting almost too easy. >> and now he is trying to do the same thing with seamus, the dog. >> exactly. >> something really horrible came out this morning. apparently there is a guy throwing a birthday fund raiser

for ann romney today. and when he was 22 or around that age, him and three of his buddies got wasted killed a dog, skinned it cooked it and tried to eat it in a park in illinois. and when the cops arrested them they were covered in blood. >> wait who is this? mitt romney in illinois? >> apparently a guy throwing a fund raiser for ann romney. >> oh, okay. >> oh, god. oh, by the way for people listening yesterday, i was worried about my dog max. he is sign, but i'm that kind of dog owner, i did x rays and everything, and he is fine. >> and you had his colors done. >> yes. >> is he an autumn. >> he is winter. all white. >> mary beth in connecticut.

welcome. >> hi, stephie, mooks. it's the projim loving barn mom of the "stephanie miller show." >> hello. >> when you get cuddles will you teach her dressage. >> yes when i make cuddles my guide horse, yes, i will. and i will be in a gay pride parade with dancing cuddles. >> thank you. thanks for letting my daughter call in last week. >> i'm always happy to pimp out hal sparks. >> i'm looking forward to meeting him and you and john in boston. >> yay, in june, hooray. 45 minutes after the hour. fridays with sexy liberal john fugelsang. >> announcer: i got her number off of the men's room stall. 1-800-steph-1-2. ♪

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what the current audience can expect from my show is the unexpected. >>stephanie miller challenges the system, now it's your turn. >>it's a little bit of magic. >>connect with "talking liberally with stephanie miller" at facebook.com/stephaniemillershow and on twitter at smshow. ♪

>> announcer: stephanie miller -- ♪ she's not like you and me ♪ ♪ la da da dee, la da dee, da, da da ♪ >> 50 minutes of the more. 1-800-steph-1-2 the phone number toll free from anywhere. meredith in california. you are on the "stephanie miller show." >> hi, i wanted to say a few things about the president obama is cool commercial. i thought it was one of ours. >> i know. >> he looks like the most interesting man in the world.

[ laughter ] >> and i think we should -- i think we should coauthor it, and when it says are you better off than you were? and if not, please vote for a democrat in the senate. >> yes, the least interesting man in the world and the most interesting man. and at the end, go yes, we are better off. here are the statistics. >> yeah. >> oh, by the way, boner talking about for the first time ever in history, the campaigning is for some -- >> what? >> talking about actual issues that affects actual people. >> to try to make this a political issue is pathetic. >> it is a political issue, you were going to let student loan

rates double. >> dana said bush had a very different outlook on these comedy shows. >> really? >> there is video. >> exactly. ♪ you're a lying sack of crap you're a lying sack of crap ♪ >> she is still a tiny little body of deception. >> and bush always appeared on "deal or no deal." [ bell chimes ] [ applause ] >> again this was a president who did a whimsical who mocked not finding weapons of mass destruction. >> that wasn't him.

>> anybody remember mc rove. >> yes. we just posted that this morning. >> yeah, brenda in south carolina you are on the "stephanie miller show." hi brenda. >> hi, steph, you read my emea little while ago. but you forgot the most important part happy birthday to my dogs sadie and daisy. >> they are five today. oh, they are five years old, they are hand many. >> my cat turned two this week, i didn't know you could get a pet shout out from miss miller. daryle my right-wing love muffin in ohio how are you doing daryle? >> hey stephanie how are you doing? >> good.

>> you are having so much fun and i feel it will be to dry with what i want to say. >> why? because you are a republican. >> they are supposed to compromise. >> is that a dirty word? >> in some things. you are saying compromise for the sake of copromiez. but the real thing is -- fiscally democrats -- democratic fiscal policies are not rational unfortunately. >> they are not? they are not as rational as george bush's policies. >> democratic presidents -- >> bush is not the representative of a conservative view -- >> was reagan sir? >> yes. >> did reagan balance the budget once in eight years? >> no, he didn't balance the budget. >> could you tell me the last republican president to balance

the budget sir. >> clinton. >> the last republican president. >> oh, republican -- richard nixon. >> that's right. so your argument is -- >> no no, no. there is no way to avoid running any kind of deficit at times. it has happened. but here is the thing -- >> so deficits don't matter as dick cheney said. >> deficits don't matter in the short-term, no but when you run a systemic deficit like we're doing now, yeah maybe in five or ten years -- >> sir, the right-wing, the gop -- the republican party controlled the white house, the house, and the senate from 2000 through 2007. they ran deficits every single year, and controlled everything. how does this not negate every part of your argument? >> it doesn't negate any part of my argument only because --

>> not any part every part. >> because they didn't roll over the deficit every year and grow it exponentially. >> they didn't put the two wars on the books sir -- >> yeah, obama didn't create this deficit. >> i understand, but there is one thing you are ignoring on that fiscal program, and that is the government spending actually went down at times -- >> it only went down -- government spending only went down if you don't factor in these costly stupid wars. >> that's right. >> and medicare part d. >> let me bring you something -- >> by that you mean let me ignore that and move on to something else. >> where would fiscal conservatives every vote for the republican party given the last 35 years of their history? you can't trust them with your money. >> that's a great question and because most people can't be idealistically committed, there has not to be come compromise

and the compromise is they may spend a lot but not as much -- >> you just admitted that bill clinton left an incredible surplus, george bush left an incredible deficit -- >> i thought clinton turned out to be in hindsight one of the best presidents we have ever had -- >> uh-huh. >> so why do you want to go back to the republican policies -- >> other than ron paul which gop didn't want to go to a complete return to bush policies. >> hang on john. go ahead daryle. >> romney is going to be closer to clinton than closer to bush, so i mean -- >> no, he is not. he is bush to the tenth power. >> he wants to cut taxes for the wealthy even more. >> even more. oh, dear god in heaven! >> ah. >> and in all of this clinton

praise that he deserves his fair share of the blame. >> these are his -- you know this is his recommendation former chair president bush's council of economic advisors there you go, now an advisor to romney, claim that projections claimed in obama's most re-kent projection would -- austin goolsby from the president's economic advisor the claims is factually wrong. go look at the budget office members. they directly refruit the central claim. that's the problem, they are just wrong! >> yeah. >> i don't like your facts! >> all right. right back on the "stephanie miller show." ♪

v ♪ [ theme music ] ♪ why hello current tv fans. here we are hour three of the friday show. oh, hello, are you still there? [ laughter ] >> we're getting -- >> are you a little tuckered? >> no. right-wing world, celebrity stack -- stop doing product placement particularly with stephanie miller sexy liberal tour volume one. >> this is a hand warmer. >> right. >> we have right-wing world where rush limbaugh is going to say something really sexist. [ laughter ] >> i know. >> and we have dana gould coming up in about a half hour and

we're also talk about george zimmerman shut his website down. but he already made $200,000. >> yeah. >> he has gotten paid, so now his lawyer wants him to shut it down apparently. >> yeah. all of that as we continue now, jacki schechner in the kur rent news center. good morning, stephanie. good morning, everyone. the soon to be presidential candidate lost his secret service tonight. and he is visiting the zoo today. there is an nbc reporter along with him for the day and he is putting out information on twitter, including that newt has been to more than a hundred zoos. the house is planning to vote on a gop bill that would stop

interest rates for student loans from doubling this summer. republicans want to take money out of the healthcare fund to pay the cost. republicans are coming around to the idea of not letting the loans increase because they voted in favor of it earlier this month. the white house has come out with a note saying it would veto that bill. the president and the first lady with in hinesville, georgia today. they are take on the issue of for profit colleges targeting veterans and service members and getting them to sign up for courses that they can't necessarily afford. it would give military families and service members the information they need in order to make smart decisions, information of financial aide and likelihood of graduation. you can join us in chat

current.com/stephaniemiller. we'll be right back. ♪

we will not settle for easy answers. (vo) the former governor of ny eliot spitzer, joins the new news network. >>every night we will drill down on the days top stories in search of facts that inform. >> we don't stop until we get answers that are truthful, serious, and not based on simplistic answers. >>we're here because we're independent.

♪ >> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's the "stephanie miller show"! ♪ i'm walking on sunshine woe ho i'm walking on sunshine woe ho ♪ ♪ it's time to feel good hey all right now ♪ ♪ it's time to feel good ♪ >> yahoo! 6 minutes after the hour. happy friday everybody. 1-800-steph-1-2 the phone number toll free from anywhere. >> 100? >> 1-800-steph-1-2. what! stephaniemiller.com the web

address. minneapolis sexy liberal tour is nearing selling out. go to sexyliberal.com and put in the word key word and buy two or more tickets to get your discount. all right. karen in illinois. yes, we will buy the book. [ bell chimes ] [ applause ] >> momma is starting to work on a book. we love the stories, and want more details about growing up insane amongst republicans. >> you voted republican up until your days at usc. >> i was under threat of -- you know. >> something. >> i would get tackled or shot

with a bb gun. in madson you even got a few chuckles out of my husband. we were leaving after the meet and grope, and he says he can understand why you're so obsessed. and momma, i understand you are upset of your floaters. a lot of people are worried about momma's floaters. the only thing we cautions -- the doctor only cautioned me about if they become more numerous it could be a detached retina. have you had a blow to the head recently? maybe your repeated exposure to

the sarah palin's voice could be the problem. >> guys and gals! >> your new look would appeal to the pirate demographic. dave in indianapolis. thank you. ♪ >> you need a current logo on my eye patch. [ bell chimes ] >> product placement. >> derek, steph i love seeing you at current. you are looking better than ever but my cable company doesn't offer current in hd. that will never happen. [ dramatic music ] >> these cameras are already in hd. >> when current goes to hd i'm going to smash those with a mallet. [ laughter ] >> i wanted to say i understand what you are going through with your mom not knowing how to use the machine.

i tried to show my grandmother how to show the computer and when i state start it she started poking the screen. >> i once had to fish my finger in there for years to try to turn it on and get electrocuted. i'm like thanks mom, thank. [ electrical buzzing ] [ applause ] >> yes. and one last one. justin in san francisco i live to you on my radio app then the lohse call station plays glen beck! [ screaming ] >> who's ratings are down 90%. [ applause ] >> on the way in i nearly wet myself when you were talking the back and forth about what siri says. >> you are a lying sack of crap. you are a lying sack of crap.

a dirty nasty, stinky stack of liquid crap. >> that's awesome. [ laughter ] >> i was asking earlier, does this make me a really bad bleeding heart liberal, but my girlfriend likes to get in fights with siri and i'm like don't say that to her. it's what people do now, they get in fights with siri what if i swallow too much lube? siri how do i clean needles with bleach? [ laughter ] >> oh, god. i defend an inanimate computer because i feel bad. >> what did siri tell you when

you asked what happened in you swallow too much lube? >> i was just making a joke. the internet with my porn. >> sure. >> i get turned down by porn. >> oh, you are going to have to. okay. [ laughter ] >> are you really going to ask siri? >> hang on. hang on. >> ask it. this is good radio. >> siri how do -- >> you missed it. you missed the window. [ applause ] >> i missed my window. >> why are you so slow bitch. >> oh my god, for some reason siri always calls cenk. oh no. [ whacky comedy music ] >> my iphone pocket dials carly carlin all the time. >> really? >> michelle wall kin on hannity.

>> america has -- has been collectively a slow learner when it comes to barack obama, and i have said many times that we knew what we were getting and we were frustrated you and i trying to get the message out in 2008. and that's why we're redoubling our efforts to vet the president not only his record, but everything that lead up to his grooming, the marinading and the leftist progressive ideology, and it's going to get worse. >> wow. she is getting a little hysterical. >> she is always hysterical sounds. >> next year she gets to celebrate the one-year anniversary of george bush nailing osama bin laden. >> awesome. by the way, the gop will keep vetting president obama if it kills them. he said he thinks people running

for office -- just some unnamed people ought to prove their citizenship. when he was satisfied that obama met those qualifications, he side stepped it, i haven't been in the middle of that inspection. >> inspection. >> and whoever wins the republican nomination will likely beat the democratic nominee. >> although it's -- you know they are probably not putting up a strong democrat to fight, but it's not unheard of arizona -- they had -- in fact mccain replaced a democrat senator. >> yeah. although they say arizona may be in flames this summer. >> yeah. >> okay. on the five. romney is not running against one opponent. he is running against several. it's like batman would have to fight the joker and there would

be all of the hench men with turtlenecks. that's the media. romney will have to fight them off. >> that sounds fun. >> except for that story that showed that obama got twice as much negative coverage as romney last year. john eastman for the national organization for marriage on the radio. >> yes. >> governor romney has signed our pledge where he will defend this defensive marriage act, support an amendment to protect traditional mare age nationwide and we expect he will honor his pledge in that regard. >> you go on and keep on expecting that governor romney will stick to his original issue. >> he has promised that he has flip flopped on the issue of gay

marriage. >> okay. if you look at ending the war in iraq and afghanistan, if you think about the president reviving the auto industry and the president saying something to wall street and trying to reign in some of those raiders -- >> i think that's pretty therein gruel. >> really? as opposed to that fluffy light oat meal that george bush had. >> really capturing osama bin laden big deal. >> and now the now rush limbaugh saying something sexist, and also making fun of someone else's weight. >> mr. clinton worked very hard. and now hilary has eached the

pinnacle that all she is is a secretary. he is the secretary of the state. state! whatever. she is still a secretary. no, don't say that. don't say. there's no trying to get me to keep talking about spanks and i don't know -- i -- i know people that might be better served if there was a product called spang spangles. >> that was a joke about her weight. >> how is this guy makes millions and millions of dollars of year. >> because he tells middle-aged and senior white guys with impacted colons what they want to hear. >> he stays on the air and still

has colon blow. [ explosion ] >> yeah. >> and we finish with tucker. >> i'm not convinced a lot of americans give the president credit for say the killing of osama bin laden. >> really, huh? >> he didn't try hard enough or something. >> everybody today go to alter net.org to read the new column tucker carlson's decent. >> yeah, i read that. >> it's a great article, and they don't believe he is racist or sexist just that he is lame because he is using racism to get hits on his cite. >> right. 18 minutes after the hour. right back with fridays with john fugelsang on the "stephanie miller show." >> oh, i like her! >> announcer: it's the "stephanie miller show." ♪

>>this is outrageous! we've have no choice, we've lost our democracy here. ♪

>> announcer: stephanie miller -- ♪ the future is so bright i've got to wear shades i've got to wear shades ♪ >> yeah, it is the "stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 23 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-1-2 the phone number toll free from anywhere. fridays with sexy liberal john fugelsang. >> is that tim buck three you are playing? >> it is. >> wow. >> i know, right? >> i saw them open for sting once at jones beach. >> you blurt out the most embarrassing stuff. >> now about cluster fox.

first lady celinda lake says she would like to sneak out more. [ mysterious music ] >> on thursday speaking before a group of children -- >> children. >> try to indoctrinate your children first lady michelle obama praised the secret service. she loves hookers and blow. [ laughter ] >> oh, god. [ screaming ] >> described how difficult it was for her and the president to sneak out if they wanted to. [ screaming ] >> see, black people are sneaky. >> a few months ago she snuck out to target. >> exactly. she is say anything and fox news makes it some sort of -- [ explosion ] >> but target has a clothing line by mohay which proves that gay men are trying to invade the fashion industry.

[ screaming ] >> shocking. >> let's go to dave in london. welcome. >> hello, stephanie. i wanted to call you earlier, but we had to evacuate there was a bomb scare at the "huffington post." >> i saw that. are you okay? >> yeah, we're fine. they arrested him. he failed a driving test at the driving school nearby and he was looking for his instructor strapped with cans of gasoline. >> please, please bring the sexy liberal tour to london. >> oh. >> we need you here because for the last two years we have been having economic policies from the conservatives very much like what mitt wants to do and he is always over the papers this

week briton is now back in a double-digit recession. >> yes, thank you. >> austerity working for you. >> yes. >> shock talking. >> yeah, exactly. bill in st. louis. hello. >> good morning, momma and the mooks. >> hello. >> i was wondering if i would be the official surly bartender. >> oh yes please. go ahead. [ laughter ] >> i was -- wanted to complement jim for all of the voices and the bits and i was curious if you worked with any members of the fire side theater. >> i know fill procter. >> i just love the stuff you are doing. >> that is why he is the voice deity. >> everybody needs one. i wish i had one. >> yes. >> i was noticing there seems to be that veiled racism -- >> veiled?

i didn't think it was veiled -- >> veiled like a columbian hooker. [ laughter ] >> thank that name from america's cross roads to america's burning cross roads. >> there you go. chris in atlanta on the same subject. hi, chris. >> hey, i am so glad we got to see how the republicans would act with our first black president. they have lost their mind. they are so racist, mail chauvinist, that the tea party has been born. [ laughter ] >> oh, wow. look at that cracking you up. >> buddy in columbus. hi, buddy. >> hey buddy. >> good morning, momma to you and the mooks and that uber hot jacki schechner. >> yes. >> one number the scottish guy rubbing the balloon on donald trump's hair.

i love them scotts but we are so lucky to the president we have. that picture of our president in the bus -- >> oh, yeah. >> i mean that is an image for the ages. >> yeah. >> and at the end of it he doesn't talk about he is the first black president, he talked about the sacrifices of others. one day we'll be lucky enough to say we had a great president. >> yeah. and thank you for that picture of the heisman trophy pose. >> yeah, that was the air force -- >> but they are just like cracking up. they asked him to do it. and he did. and you know -- check out the difference between the looks on the faces in the people in the obama crowd and the romney crowd. romney -- >> if they would have added

romney to do it. he would said what now? i can do a dressage horse pose. >> yeah. >> the people in the background of the romney speech are looking off to the side like can i get my per diem now? >> yeah, where is my cash? the women -- when he made the cookie comment she was just -- >> there's a real enthusiasm deficit, and it's easy to see why. but, again, don't underestimate liberals. >> yeah, that's true. >> back with dana gould next on the "stephanie miller show." ♪ oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ jennifer granholm is politically

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very, very excited about that and very proud of that. >>beltway politics from inside the loop. >>we tackle the big issues here in our nation's capital, around the country and around the globe. >>dc columnist and four time emmy winner bill press opens current's morning news block. >>we'll do our best to carry the flag from 6 to 9 every morning. >>liberal and proud of it.

♪ >> and what does -- >> announcer: stephanie miller -- >> -- this of 35 years of success? >> don't ask me, i'm just a girl. [ giggling ] >> 34 hours after the hour 1-800-steph-1-2. we have jim ward right there, and john fugelsang in the new york bureau -- >> and you can now donate to george zimmerman at fugelsang.com. >> no, you can't. [ buzzer sounds ] >> george zimmerman has shut down his website. >> well, he has 200 grand now. >> yeah. it features two pictures.

one of that vandalized black culture center. that said long live zimmerman. his lawyer said this might look bad. >> what his lawyer said this morning is he may need up to a million dollars in defense fund. >> really? >> so the lawyer wasn't too upset about it. this is mr. zimmerman who in his apology to the trayvon martin family that i thought your son was a little bit younger than me. and on the 911 tape -- >> teenager. >> yeah. >> help or i'll shoot. >> jim ward and comedian extrordanaire john fugelsang, and dana gould is here! good morning.

>> good morning. >> we had your follow in studio. >> nice. >> you are both performing together? >> this sunday at 6:30 at the writer's guild theater here in los angeles on well-shire boulevard. >> and we are doing work for citizens united who among other things is leading the fight to overturn the citizens united -- the citizens united ruling. >> yeah, stand up for main street is the program. and what a lineup you have. you and rick obviously wendy leadman, ray romano, what a great show. >> yes people taking time away from their podcasts to do something they can talk about on a future podcast. [ laughter ] >> i once felt had because i had no podcast, and then i met who

had no blog. but, of course i do have a podcast, stephanie. >> why thank you, dana. >> which is 59 more minutes than anyone needs to send with me. continue. >> there are a lot of great stuffs this group has worked on. >> yeah, it is basically a public citizens group. and it is standing up for the little guy. and what is amazing we live in a time whether corporations turn the little guy against the things that the little guy relies on. >> were you the one that -- >> it never ceases to amaze me. people who will never clear $40,000 a year bitching about the death tax. >> exactly. >> let me throw a name at you, my sister. >> yeah.

are you the pub that did the "huffington post" piece -- >> that was steve who founded the organization. >> okay. but he did point out that it is a lot like battle star gal lactic ka, and i'm sure everyone who hears my voice knows, and if you don't know why are we talking? [ laughter ] >> yeah. it really is the best republican primary for comedy ever. isn't it? >> it is amazing, and they have elected their own cilonesque candidate. it would be great if they were forced to dress in the era in which they held their views. >> they already are. >> if you look at rick santorum

he would have to be in like ruffles and spats and a powdered wig. that's the era in which his views on women were forged. >> i think that's a good idea. >> yeah. >> is this the death of comedy though that mitt will be the candidate. >> no, one of the great things is he is the actual comedy and it is already -- he is only trailing by two points. which is always amazing to me that basically they could nominate a barrel of used batteries, and it would be 49-51. [ laughter ] >> uh-huh. >> they are getting some funky chicken parts. >> yeah. >> we were saying with this super pac, it basically is saying barack obama is too cool. >> yeah. and they all -- they -- look

you know there are differences of opinion and, you know, people do -- i have very good friends that are republicans, and people have different views of how to skin a cat. you know, there are different ways to approach different problems. that's all fine. i like to talk to republicans who i can have a difference of opinion with and yet -- but we don't hate each other. i don't think they want to destroy the country we just have different views. that's fine. they always come down on the wrong side of every social issue, and the fact they are attacking you for being too cool. it is the party of eddie haskell and the principal from farris buler's day off. they are so naked. >> yeah. >> and i hate using naked and

karl rove in the same sentence. >> yeah. >> but he does look like a nylon stocking stuffed with light bulbs. and you rarely get santorum and women. >> no. >> they don't get the whole war on women. these transvaginal probes. you have lawmakers going just close your eyes. >> you can tell -- you can tell that it dings them that they it blew up in their face. blew up in their face and santorum those are different -- >> yes. >> you are packing an awful lot of santorum humor into this segment, friend. >>ing from choice of words. yeah tightly packed. >> the real war on women is gas prices. or the epa's attempt to regulate

hydro frac-ing. >> yeah. >> the real war on women is surfailing the estate tax. >> uh-huh. they can run but they can't hide from it. and i like that even rick santorum's wife said well he won't do these things. so you know they are insane. >> you brought up citizens united one of the things that the event tonight is about, and the supreme court obviously is right in the center of this race, they are about to decide on healthcare and immigration, and they have gotten to politicized, haven't they? >> culture shifts on a pendulum and it swings far to the left and far to the right, and in the case of the supreme court, there are many on the far right who say that the warren court swung too far to the left and i have my opinion of opinion with that but the roberts court shows the

conservative movement swinging far too far to the right. and that's one of the important things about this presidential election is that it never seems to translate to people. >> right. >> remember, you know, clarence thomas is going to be there for ten, 20, 30 more years. >> right. >> you have to -- elections have consequences, and you have to really realize this court is so dangerously far to the right it bogles the mind. so what public citizen is doing is beginning the movement for a constitutional amendment to overturn the citizens united ruling, which is the reason we have this insane presidential election now. >> right. >> i will say something in defense of mitt romney. >> okay. >> i know someone who knows him very well. >> uh-huh.

>> from massachusetts. and they say this. he is a smart guy, and right now is very well aware that he is stuck in a clown show. >> yeah. yeah. >> dole syndrome. >> and does not feel comfortable in the clown show. and we're getting the clown show take over. >> that's part of it is that -- john fugelsang saying you created the etch-a-sketch moment. he was the one that asked the question -- >> john was? >> yeah. >> i follow you on twitter. >> i follow you dana. >> you guys do your bromance on your own time. >> twitter is not the greatest place to go if you feel like you are being followed. [ laughter ] >> my point is john's question was right on the money. the problem is he has been pushed so far to the right by

this clown show and on top of it he has that flip flopper reputation. >> i don't think he is a man of any core beliefs whatsoever. >> at least he has been consistent in that his entire year. he has been a human wind sock the whole way. >> yes he is zelic. [ laughter ] >> exactly. this sunday go to citizen.org for tickets. dana a pleasure. talk to you again real soon. >> can i say one last thing? >> yes. >> here is what the republicans would do if barack obama was their client -- not client -- but if it was reversed. think of mitt romney in your mind, and barack obama in your mind. and the headline would be one of these men dies their hair.

[ laughter ] >> back with the remaining moments with friday with john fugelsang. >> she is your human happy pill. ♪ happy, happy joy, joy ♪ >> announcer: it's the "stephanie miller show." ♪ to cover their bets. >>we are the investigators fiercely independent, and we don't hold back. >>we're here because we're independent and that's what we love. >>...and we don't do talking points. >>i think the hypocrisy is so blatant. >>and above all... and there's only once place you'll find us. >>weeknights on current tv.

>>you couldn't say it any more powerfully than that. >>it really is incredible.

♪ ♪ well well well -- >> announcer: stephanie miller -- ♪ -- oh yeah, you are making my dreams come true ♪ >> yeah. yeah. >> it's too bad he didn't write any hooks. >> yeah. >> 50 minutes after the hour.

1-800-steph-1-2 the phone number toll free from anywhere. sexy liberal john fugelsang making all dreams come true. >> yeah. >> may almost sold out. i would hurry to get that that is the next upcoming sexy liberal. and john fugelsang can be seen elsewhere. >> yes, i will. this past january we got the pleasure of playing in phoenix. i'll be returning there a week from this saturday bringing guilt a love story and i'm thrilled to be going back to phoenix and the crowds are great. and tickets are on sale for that. so please come down to see a solo show, for those who hate solo shows. >> all right. [ nbc "nightly news" theme ] >> here is a story about everything that is wrong with america. another commercial collapsed after eating a burger.

i'm really like a live and live liberal, this is just wrong. >> this is like a mccartney song. >> a woman collapsed into unconsciousness after eating a double hamburger, having a drink, and smoking a cigarette. all of the burgers were named after various forms of cardiac arrests. [ whacky comedy music ] >> wow. >> they do offer the sloppy joe iv drip there. >> the heart attack grill's owner, say it is a lifestyle. the heart attack grill offers free meals to any customer who weighs over 350 pounds and features a butter fat milk

shake, and others. >> do they have some sort of deal with a funeral parlor. >> last year the spokes model died when he was 29. [ somber music ] >> and michelle obama is the bad guy saying hey, kids, move a bit and have a carrot! [ nbc "nightly news" theme ] >> did you hear this? a long island woman said she was fired after she donated a kidney to help save her boss. she filed a complaint with the new york state human rights commission last tuesday claiming her boss used her for her kidney and then fired her after he got what she wanted. she said she started treating me horribly viciously inhumanely

after the surgery. it was almost like she hired me just to get a kidney. >> wow, that's incredible. >> wow. wow. wow. >> and one day she wasn't feeling all that well because of the surgery, and she asked for time off, and the boss said no you have to be here. >> you're fired! >> that is probably going to be a special wing in hell where your kidney is taken without anesthesia every day. by carrot top. [ nbc "nightly news" theme ] >> sean penn has received an award for work in haiti. >> yeah. >> he is one of the other people at fox news that villainizes. he spends after his time in haty. >> yeah. >> he has 55,000 people living in a nine-hole golf course many of whom can't go home.

i got to go to the officer's tent, and all of the flat screens were tuned to fox, but the generals all said to me it was so inspiring to see the military and artists working together. >> that's what i mean. any left wing celebrity they love to criticize. he is the one fishing people out of the water africa katrina. [ nbc "nightly news" theme ] >> lindsay lohan has been invited to the white house correspondence dinner. she said i love comebacks i would like to see her succeed. she brought kim kardashian last year. >> oh my. it's almost like scientologists are in to celebrities. >> let's all rage over

ridiculously designer baby clothing. we have previously discussed the fact that there is little more unsettling than encountering a baby who is dressed better than you. more than designers than ever are making expensive clothes for their babies. >> you have to find new ways to say screw you third world. >> right. >> he said we don't need to explain why spending $500 for a dress is dumb. "new york times" -- oh they had fashion experts. check out the new $375 gucci baby dress.

[ applause ] >> we are rome with better plumbing. i haven't read that article but i plan on it sometime after i have a nap in 2016. >> speaking of my babies here is what i need to get. dog tv. the first network to deliver 24 hour programming for dogs. hi, handsome man! >> oh, my god. >> the shows on dog tv are going to be three to six-minute segments. >> okay. >> third-world children need to dream of being reincarnated. >> exactly. >> it is going to be put on cable systems nationwide by the end of the year so ask for current and dog tv. [ applause ] >> please ask for current first. >> yes. >> rod in missouri. you are on the "stephanie miller

show." hey, rod. >> hi, how are you doing? i love your show. >> thank you. >> first of all i want to be the official extreme liberal for your station. [ bell chimes ] >> okay. then. >> okay. i got a question in regards to the -- a couple of days ago they came out with obama's inauguration that the republicans were plotting right off the bat -- >> yep. >> and i wanted to know why wasn't that considered -- shouldn't that be considered as treason. >> and fox news teaches you that compromise is appeasement. >> exactly. thank you john fugelsang! >> thank you steph and mooks. >> see you monday on the "stephanie miller show"! ♪