lunch mud beneath there are days when i wish i had someone. i don't mention me seen it on chi but there's no one. i often feel like that here. then i turn inward and ask myself why do i feel this way this. my absence i'm cut like that i couldn't escape the kind of loneliness i felt to present it was so overpowering that i couldn't avoid confronting it like it was the . bench get it when i make peace with myself i don't feel anything the same way anymore. then i was myself and it's ok.

and some credit was offered for i associate learning this with shame which. is something i don't like to reveal. when i was also to appear in this film my 1st thought was i don't want to tell anybody that i'm lonely serious crime. when all he can moved away from berlin 5 years ago she dreamed of belonging to

a community of friends in the countryside. you're. alive i'm a single parent i live in this house with my son uli who is 11. back to school i like the house i like the woods i like lots of things here and i haven't regretted the move. but there are very few people living out here i've enjoyed i kept looking for fellowship. and then i thought i have to accept things the way they are. discarded as. steps might have why no. seeing even my friends don't always see how unhappy i am that i'm alone or how abandoned i feel sometimes. it's something i don't often show to the outside world. something i don't like sharing.

i can see and then of course i'd rather be seen as a happy person and i am one that's not always like this. and i hope to thank you and the main reason i felt lonely was that i saw no future for myself little feelings i was scared nothing had any meaning and i felt like no one understood everyone was concerned about me and tried to help but they didn't understand. marcus has been living in the eastern german city of leipzig for the past year he overcame a crisis and rebuilt his life. for such

a period of studio i had studied economics and was highly motivated from the start . but when i was finishing my doctoral thesis i experienced my 1st crisis. the thesis wasn't moving ahead and at the same time i was hoping to find meaning in a new intimate relationship and the law in the. book was you know that's what i was in a difficult situation and didn't want to admit it. for ethical reasons i didn't want to end my existing relationship. but i didn't want to abandon my girlfriend. but i was contorting myself pretending and that brought on panic attacks very severe ones like. markus look for new ways to make sense of his life. i'm going to start over and i don't know where i got the idea from but i thought

that yoga and meditation would help calm me down. and in fact i did start feeling a lot better. i was more optimistic and reached a point where i thought the improvement was permanent. but then i had a relapse. 2 2 2 2 2 2 2 mostly at least i have to admit i never wanted to live in a senior citizens home not with all those old mummies. i didn't mind visiting

former colleagues and friends but living one never. knows but here i am like a mummy myself. 95. after suffering a stroke 5 years ago my lease moved into the marchese back home for retired actors and by my. indian food. i have lost so much strength in the 5 years i've been living here i have to say. old age. why am i still around. because of the mournful to hear i was an actress for 45 years i trained at the

starts to. feel on feel to the end i graduated in 1944 on the world was still going on. for us playing the classics was what i enjoyed most. here. or when you see what it's like growing old in a home like this or in any nursing home it's shocking. and contact made in under mangers very little contact with other people. my conversation is limited to good morning enjoy your walk. and so on for instance i still don't know who sits behind me and that's very sad on this is. one everybody goes to their own room and stays there all alone.

living in the countryside isn't the only reason she feels lonely. for them as my parents were always terribly busy both of them had full time jobs and my brother was disabled from birth. so i used to read lots of fairy tales and i withdrew into myself. yeah i want to yeah bush as a child i was very lonely and it was like being froze and. i began to feel that i wasn't important i'm not all right. i'm not interesting. and that's a factor in my current loneliness i still have this feeling that i'm not very interesting not important enough to be loved. unconsciously i carry this feeling around with me as

a kind of premise with which i approach people. and they sense that. and burned. as you wish but of course you can also feels lonely sometimes because there just aren't many people around. them there's just the 2 of us. even have the feeling that he may have learned his negative behavior for me so when he makes a phone call he says oh they're not interested in me the same way that i do. wonder if perhaps not each moment i talk to him about it recently that like someone once told me a tiger makes 19 attempts before ripping into its prey to avoid and obviously

people are preoccupied with other things. but that doesn't mean that i'm not ok. this is something i want to work on. i want to cut through this negative recurring fault. and. marcus was caught off guard by his relapse he'd been doing so well. trapped in a vicious circle of negative thoughts he retreated further and further from the real world. of austin the kiss. of life i started to think i was in a place that nobody else could understand and that my thoughts were unique. and on

the other. or on. and off on and i visited friends in hamburg and felt lonely when i was there simply because i was different . not because my friends had changed but because i was different then one evening i thought i had reached the end in this. new york uniform i travelled to keel. and wanted to throw myself off the high bridge last. night. but i didn't do it. from this point i had reached a point where i saw that i wasn't able to put an end to my life either.

on. its or something so i thought ok so 1st you have maybe another 50 years to live and what it meant anything for you so you'll survive the next 5 minutes. that is going to be your path in life. my least longs for interactions that she can't find in the senior citizens home. as a matter of not burden. when i 1st came here my neighbor was mentally very active case the. she was happy to converse with me. how we work closely but it got to be less and less. this filled 0

people regress and become confused phone. device and she doesn't know what season it is helps. she says it's may when it's autumn the of the on the money may i. see this an experience it i don't say anything because it's painful. the tool yeah can you understand that . if you can. because you see i'm talkative mange and. behold i need people around me people i can talk to con up a fear of mere contact i thought there'd be much more interaction here. too beast i've made an effort but i'm always so dreadfully alone when i come back to my room and this is

a sad feeling this is that's loneliness in. so much medicine does. sometimes the feelings that prevent me from calling somebody are not even conscious they're unconscious i feel that it's my own fault that i'm alone you're alone because of the way you are. so i can't really put it into words but it's always the 1st step to make myself aware of it. so i would really like to have contact with somebody amounts ok. it's ok that i want contact with people. look i'm almost crying. and it's ok that i want to be alone i mean that i want to be in contact. i'm allowed to want

that it's my right i have a right to want that we're a right it's a wish that is justified it's ok. and that's and it's funny but this is the sentence i didn't have a religious upbringing but sometimes the sentence god loves me helps it does something for me although as i say i don't have any relationship to god otherwise. but apparently the simple word of god that stands for universe and world and world soul or something. it acts a bit like this which. i have loved yes. song. from the 1st we set the boundaries as you saw on the website there are rules for cuddling that are important for you and me. just so we understand the framework of

our interaction. it has to be absolutely clear that the client doesn't expect anything personal from a card largely built for both of if that happened it wouldn't be tragic but it would lead to the cuddling sessions being terminated system that's really important and something to. think about if you can see a father and i want to pass on to other people all the experiences that did me good and then i've learned. physical contact say physical contact in

a defined and protected framework. so that's what helped me when i was a lonely. horse not. sure nice wonderful that feels so good when you haven't been out for days on end. of the open sesame look you benches in the sunshine. yes right in the sun. visits from her friends they ought to mean a lot to marley. then says alan stilts when

things get really bad i safely she always knows to come when i'm really down in the dumps. and then climb back up. and then you appear. so that's right. i think that you're here. and i'm glad that you're here. together with the fellow clown muttiah take it entertains the residents of the senior citizens home in brandenburg. one of the residents has written a poem. if you rush on ahead through life. you miss the beauty surrounding you and the meaning of life. you know or you remain a lonely. to

my is most of them like you to give them a big hug. when i put on my clowns know it's like throwing a switch as a visitor. you know it's as if a light goes on. and then i'm transported to another dimension. then i me as a phina and she was if you know and you as a female is very active. she's happy. she's also the provokers have at times he. said he hopes she hops through life

through life and flies through life and is never the less sensitive she senses a lot of things but she maintains a lightness which is her strength. much of it has an influence on my life but there's a separation in my own life i'm not like yours if you know if you know. the one that. the you in the.

clubs or tentativeness i don't think there's a sure fire remedy for overcoming loneliness because everybody's different. for me it was essential to come to terms with myself to look at myself and not avoid what i saw. it and now i have reached a point where i'm more at peace with myself and always more so. if i'm doing well i can also be happy when i'm alone. but then i go for a drive listen to music sing sit here at the lake do what's good for me. and then just. happy.

to. help me to feel i don't have all that much strength anymore there are so many things i'd like to do especially for other people. to spend time with them the things that i think but these things are self-evident. and. it's so simple. and i had of him when my grandmother was dying she said i haven't lived at all.

it was dreadful to hear her say that. it was certainly a warning to me one that i never forgets i hop as well and fast. i don't want to be on my deathbed with the feeling that i've never lived an eclipse so hard. to. give god as i enjoy giving i give security i give you love i give comforting words. and cake or whatever. i like doing that i like cooking for people and having visitors i can fuss over with a person here and this and that i like doing that. and of course i miss it when there's nobody for me to fuss over and it does also leave.

them until i get is. reaching an age where you know you have just a few years left if you're lucky. if you had me never again try to cope with my moods on my own i still need the people i found and . the moeller made by lone if paul who are not to mention. before. does it's something i think about when i'm down in the dumps the shift they're nice guns can be named killer when i want to switch off completely. i did read it does emotional. beat it still i still come back and think of

people you still have them. be dean constable you can still talk to them you should probably. do business you aren't entirely alone. not all alone. my it's not good news here i've been talking so much but i had to tell you my story if most is.

hard for a. car culture. hair. color superman. superfood stylish style icon to lead a horse. lifestyle during. the moment.

3 cities in one go and. nicole phillips i'm new christy go to saxony. like says she is a city on the move with a lot of positive energy i've got big plans for today i want to discover cavanagh mike's advice i can hear and read and one day you. but 2 countries scores in the school and the girl that's going to germany. in 30 minutes on t.w. . with him how to be good goes up because when the highest high you know if i had known that the boat would be that small i never would have gone on the trip but you know i would not have put myself and my parents in that danger with the thought of the theme of the going to get a fleet would. understand that one little ditty to give them i had serious problems

on a personal level and i was unable to live there but my time going to. want to know their story and for my great scarified employable information from our parents. over a cup of joe i left of the water a week with the general off to war with the gun. and so with that's a very emotional declaration of love well come to your max we'll have more on romantic wedding traditions lay.