but i mean our 5 year average to the ends justify the means to terms with this is 45 minutes long t w. earth. or saving global engineers tell stories of creative people and innovative projects around the world ideas to protect the climate and boost green energy solutions by global oil gets beaten by a series of global 3000 on t.w. and online. this week on the 77 percent street. oh. yeah always and i mean we should know to avoid in a cost they were going to eat their money and if they've contributed $100.00 so then and they come their food is not good they won't complain for it they're going to be into the community to make sure that the money is finished something but i go there really really angry at white why not me for your happiness.

how much should one spend on a wedding well here in tanzania the answer could be as much as it takes and the cost of that could be super high including costing people their mad wages and their lives but why is it that in this particular country it seems that it is debt that is holding people together we're going to find out from my lovely panel here and we'll begin with doyle who actually you got married 2 months ago so how high is the cost of weddings in this country that i've been a divorce i don't know because everybody maybe have. bought my own marriage or so you almost see the $15000.00 yes $15000.00 is ok i'm not married and i've never. been to my wedding but is this the average cost of weddings $15000.00. no no.

it's not the average it's not the minimum is not the maximum because i had the range of which marriages i mean the ceremonies right now it could go even twice or thrice even 4 times that for just a before event what's called just the venue ok so golden godfrey is actually an event organizer dealing a lot with wedding so these are hard figures that you can give us ok there's a lady who had lifted her hand at the back please come and speak to me. ok good evening beatrice well i can be like a good example because from september i had my bro's wedding it coasted along like they do for. tea shillings so around the same price that know we are on there you can't even be like $25.00 or $30.00 well the big issue in the big is designs are different they're very hospitality and we go this sharing thing so

when my bro came 1st with his wife the god because certain bugger when they come for him so they had to announce the family then we had to the 2 of us like me and my other big bro in the parlance we had to sit down and calculate like how much does the farm has to contribute then the tubes the friends there the end we have not to say to the poverty but moreover before the wedding there were the wife the bright she has also to be done certain ceremonies like the kitchen parties the bride from home to hear well from the chagga tribe i'm cumin jarrow sore we have a lot of tradition you have to go with a blanket you have to go because of beers you have to go with the the but not knows you mind your we have bananas so the end of each you find a lot of pressure they are getting after the wedding for sure my sister in law got sick on her honeymoon secondly on our honeymoon she got sick a lot of money goes to the 1st 2 the venue's venues here are very costly then we go

maybe to the m c u 2 coast i go see those i am seeing here he will be a very good example ok so let me ask the mc because you've mentioned him by the way i must say he's a very very popular mc here in tanzania when he walked in everybody oh and he's. was he expensive yes. i'm ok so he's good and he's expensive but it's all right if you can afford him you hire him but i wanted to find out from you have you seen the trends change over the years a weddings becoming bigger and bigger even and people are getting poorer and poorer kilmore you know. what i'm going to. get as a mom into for now you. see to finish a day or to us she need to get me an orphan you know. how i want to work or you sit in a fine port. you know what you're. going to.

want to talk. to who want to give in to what. i can and honey what you get on which and here to give me peace. and human as a slave give us examples of when the course is a fine idea as it will ponder was about. to know when you're in upon a big. media. and i was. using. was upon it you yes but even with the high costs people are still getting married seal and. so how many weddings on average are you am seeing in a month just so that we get an idea of the turnover. maybe 8 yes one man 8 weddings wow so alex and your soon to be wife you are in the

process of trying to prepare for a wedding what are some of the difficulties the 2 experiencing financially or what is shocking. but you know isn't it a similar. when there is. a piano. in yuma there was a way to. lucky me. because a savior was a suit when i. was about. one. and we. know what the. morning. ok i know i now want to come to you understand here because we're hearing from alex that this is not new weddings have always been expensive so what is the main

difference between past generations and this one. should just say the previous generation didn't have a lot of. globalization so they didn't know a lot of. happening in other places but this generation my friend with technology so people wants to copy yeah i saw a wedding of my friend with these maybe she or he had a wedding planner and i also want to have their wedding planner but we forget that we come from different backgrounds and we're in a country where this. should say yeah the people we're having and the people have. so believe like we have over 26 percent of people living under the poverty line and so many people in the media and. when you say like someone gets sick for 2 days we were in the poverty line people are coping because they see a lot on instagram and facebook yes so so so you're saying that people are looking

for a sort of lifestyle or a picture that you know for their weddings just go we're calling you the professional committee member attendee because part of these weddings are funded from contributions from friends can you explain how this works. well i think high cost weddings are not a problem if you can afford them i mean you feel you have enough money you can't organize even our wedding that costs 100000000 but once you have to go out and ask for help from your colleagues from your family members then it becomes there by then because then everybody has to go out of the way to look for like more money to but but why does everyone have to go out of their way why don't you just say to your friend i'm sorry i don't have money well there's this thing in africa especially in tanzania like i cannot say no to your face so even if i mean you know deep down but i'll just have to like you know say yeah impress you but still at the

end of the day some people would still like promise they'll contribute let's say 300 dollars and end up contributing even less so then it becomes a struggle people have to see this crack their heads every now and then needs you know take the budgets down just this and that it's a problem. so let me introduce another gentleman here kenneth because my question is why get married at all then why have a wedding why not just have a customary relationship as happens in most african countries i think it's kind of prestigious because a wedding is is 14 way was to marry until you die ok so what's the process by it is grown so we need to grab that prestigious without after 30. years of. yeah when you try to flush. the gist of that moment yes we did our best this is their wedding we wanted so for you it actually forms a part of your legacy as

a couple and you were telling me earlier that you were actually in an engagement but because of financial difficulties you want able to go through with the wedding can you talk to me about that one which was before was not a problem because you know. it was. because you know back then it was just that. stage ok then after finishing the college you know they've been known as shop shop so i need to find you and you can fit my philosophy my life the state of yes that's why i. lead to the maori ok can somebody explain to me which one is more important is it the wedding or is it the marriage let me speak to sebastian by the way sebastian and anastasio are a couple and today is there a new best series yeah thank you. for choosing to spend it here debating so in your

9 years of marriage do you feel that 1st of all did you get pressure for the wedding is what we're hearing here reflective of what you experienced absolutely you know 1st of all waiting is a product of the network you hope and the income of the cup. if you take it out of that it's a problem so if you don't have enough network don't expect to have a lot of support and if you're copying from someone else that you want to make this lifestyle or a marriage of a particular style then of course you have a trouble and this is what has happened many people across normal it's supposed to be by your own cost but if you are you cannot do that you go to the nearby network and you ask like give me support so if you go to a parent and say hey daddy and mommy i want to marry and i don't have enough money please prepare for me a wedding of course they'll call their friends and this friend so contribute they'll make 100000000 wedding and from there they will start asking you to contribute back to their family and this is the biggest problem but i call it

a liability of the family because after your wedding you start receiving calls come to this committee come to this pay this whatever contribution because we did this for you and some of this member you don't even know them but you cannot start doing contributions somebody that i've never seen before and they have so many kids come in come in come in by the time you start demanding the same is what your network it was what it is and i thought ok so so far we have established that weddings are important for legacy for cultural reasons and also this thing you think it's insurance so just you're paying insurance very well which means you expect people to pay for congratulations festival on your pregnancy so when you have your baby those people whose committees you attended will they show up for you what do you expect that they will well 1st of all i don't even remember like most of them now because you know sometimes just a friend calls in say jessica can you be part of the committee because you're like

charming and stuff so sometimes you don't even have a close relationship with the couple so i don't i don't expect them to even be part of my daughter's well being oh my baby shower or anything. so right after my wedding i had received so many invite ition cards to attend to you know so many waiting committees and my mom would tell me these people supported us they were part of your wedding comedians and some of them i don't even know them so i just end up contributing just because they were a part of my of my of my community so it's time consuming 1st of all because then you have so many people from different places inviting you every saturday for community that would take maybe 2 hours or 3 hours and i feel like it's it's it's a bad and it's a bad into everybody who is invited to contribute and i'd like to go back to noel because i want to ask you do you feel that you put your friends through

a burden by asking them to contribute to your wedding. definitely you know because you know according to our culture. we have tendency of helping each other i want they contributed to you also you're supposed to pay back was one of my calling to say maybe the butt is coming to my side because the process of marriage you see needs a lot of money don't forget about the big door young turns on a brother i mean the price of we're going to pay back to the parents of the woman the money is very beginning cantelupe to give you 2 medians. things including i don't know or blankets of the parents the congo stands in the us needs money so we're not supposed to think about that but then the friends also you as the one we made a beer is a big but then you are left because of the culture and traditions we hear when times are new ok so the wedding day is just the tip of the iceberg but before that

these dawi that needs to be paid there all these ceremonies that we talked about and it's just a let me come back to you the simple answer for me would be well don't show up for your friends' contributions or contribute what you can have smaller weddings or maybe don't have weddings or toll i guess i'm trying to figure out why have weddings a toll if you can't afford it and if it puts people in debt yeah it's indeed a challenge because if you want show up to someone's waiting people will show up when yours and if you want to invite people to contribute for you know their way to like blame you and if you just decide to do it customary thing they will see you as someone who is. like yeah no socialist even lazy yeah but also might be what would really say so it's like you and they think oh you're just leaving without getting married so that's a problem but again. it's also the issue that your parents all your relatives would want to show off to the air france because they have been contributing to this and

at the end of the day even the contribution that comes you won't give any jew. that money yeah because they get it they will come to eat their money and if they've contributed a $100.00 so then and they come their food is not good they will complain forever what do you mean so they contribute and they expect the wedding to be at a certain level they contribute and they expect to eat to drink so if you want put be a way they contributed a lot about like $100.00 my friend there complain for ever so everywhere you are going there would be showing no fingers that we when you see ikea we didn't enjoy his or her wedding yes or you like have to really impress them to eat their own money that they've contributed so you are getting nothing out of that you money but at the end of the day you had a rift with a yeah because you have to borrow sometimes people borrowed wrist i have i've seen so many people borrowing dresses in their wedding dress shops like this one you will have a very big body and sometimes you will fight in your yeah in your marriage you have to fight yeah yeah so this is what it's. all right i'd like to bring the man of the

cloth because i saw you in the background. being a person who deals with a lot of married couples of event coming back to you after the wedding to say i passed this side. we need help or it's affecting their marriage some more to go to honeymoon just go to friends in a village and. joke with my friends not they go to cry because they have spent a lot of money then they come back they say father you know now. i need to prepare. money for my. maybe my 1st. how do i do my my life i would like to have a house so let me invite the people to just answer a question for me do you know of couples or have you lost friends because you did contributes a certain amount of money oh ah ok talk to me about well i think the issues about

wedding care in africa mostly as i hear is that people are afraid to lose the cycle that they have like if you don't want to be for me that i won't contribute i mean if you're going to be for me that means i will never contribute for you this is how it works so as i say i've lost too many friends more than one and one and i still have some debts and have to pay the wedding ceremonies you know own wedding oh there. i have like 3 friends who are going to be getting married one from november 1 december another the from i mean in february but how i can see i have an employment i mean to bring up but i don't and a lot that i can contribute but also i did my friends to support me as a premier so the problem is people are afraid to lose the sake of that they have they think that if i want to contribute then i lose them so it's very much a quid pro quo is

a similar to your experience you said you lost friends too yeah it is. you know like you think as many are waking up right now they do not want to have weddings that they cannot afford but we have our parents there will tell you that you must have this wedding because i contributed to 50 weddings and yeah they have to contribute to your wedding as well but in the end of the day what we don't realize is we have people i think are waiting with our folded heart that i'm coming i contributed i didn't want to do that sometimes i contribute but i go there really really angry and why do i have to pay for your happiness so things of the same sort so like that question alex let me come back to you because you're the one who is kind to you planning your wedding good luck by the way based on what everyone is saying are you feeling pressure from your parents to hold as a specific kind of wedding yannick way to make way less new an upgrade. in a tad you. special. ones and when you

get. to seclusion of wind and even if you've never ended up when you you know. anyone here who experience pressure from their parents in terms of ok i experience a challenge just morning before leaving for work i got a phone call and setting goals calling me and they say a bear listen. we need something like 5050 dollars and some like a 120007 shillings and i said who are you you say i'm he does friend i came through reading you see that challenge the pressure that the putting on you they contributed to your wedding so you need to to do something about it so this challenges are there i think thank you we've articulated the problems very well i just want to find out how do people end up paying for these debts golden. yes some dates are endless that it's unless they're always endless and. payment could be.

explained that if you pay i mean if you contribute to someone's wedding you're committing them to contribute to yours so from my perspective a client might come and if she comes or he comes with family friends or. uncles and aunties and they contribute personally there you should know that you should expect that they're putting an expectation to them and they show that i am committing to this so that it gets done so that when my child or i get wed you're supposed to commit the same in the expects that do we contribute as much to education health care or is it just exclusive. this is very interesting topic because the same people that they're they're putting pressure to the wedding 1st of all they're one to specifically where they're not ready to hear from you or from in about us anything that does not relate to the celebration there

weren't going to be the only things that they are sure they're going to eat they're going to spend the money they're going to be into the community to make sure that the money is finished people are not being a you agreeing ok so when it comes to the important issue like a school fees somebody is sick nobody is actually putting pain to that ok so please let me come to you. ok 1st of we have to know that we all are even in the community that to save something from us when you to comes to marriage is a set abrasion so you should not have void it anymore got reza how close fully t's got a list how how much you have. waiting we should not skip it but also something we got less of what they put you in debt you say. i mean we should note avoid any cost. yes please. in talking about the quality

you can avoid because it's not sort of the people making the marriage even the people that make the marriage so that's how we perceive or how you manage to be oh you're waiting so much to be it depend on. it's a request to for example taking that number of the village people also they make the marriage and they say it and they have the wedding ceremony let's not say that they didn't know what instead of money is high cost you know the prepaid by get in that their business hotness you think people who are getting into debt are just being unreasonable yeah. ok now i want to find out how we stop this cycle i mean for somebody the gentleman at the back though you have an answer already let's come to you. all right now speaking about my marriage and where. the spirit is spirit through how people contribute if you want people to contribute to higher if you missed that you give somebody a future so if you want to treat it right since maybe it's simple you can you can

actually do it for this is a message i'm going to have it made i'm going to have a wedding so i'm trying to make it to simple so as i don't want people to contribute so i can control myself and then. they don't really come with it and then after that they won't ask me for contributions ok so there is a hack i don't know if you heard it from the back he's saying he's going to have a small wedding that way people will contribute less and he will be asked for less in the future. yes what i think what we suggest to clients because it is our culture weddings are important debts is no one's culture though yes that's why we act wise with it we form our clients to choose wisely to pick what they need and to sort and to compromise on the things that i necessary ok. so what is best to go is no income how much you have prepare a simple wedding with your closest friend and the. closest relatives and you can do

as affordable as your income so the problem is that somebody has to start contributing to somebody because expecting people to contribute and it will keep waiting because he doesn't know if it's enough for him if he knows the waiting i can have 2 more pieces because we have to who yes. ok i saw my name is alan rahim so i believe a simple solution is not to give in to p.f. pressure because basically in our culture this type of wedding say that christianity readings from muslim weddings which most of the time $1.00 cost more than $250.00 but if you decide to do things like involve the venue's and not expensive clothes that's just you falling into peer pressure but then people like my saying here might not have a job if everybody decides to do that raise the balance no i want i'm saying is if you can afford to do then that's ok but if you can afford to you don't have to fall into peer pressure because what you see everybody is doing is they're trying to compete i want to have a better wedding than the last person they can see this couple have lasted for 9 years but that when he was very simple so you don't have to give in to peer pressure and get into expensive debts just because you could have

a wedding that doesn't even give up to this experience you can have ok and the final question is going to go to the man who said weddings are on hold at the moment after listening to this conversation do you think you will have a wedding in the future. not the near future but in the future yes. ok and that's how we wrap up this debate i think we can all agree that we've learned a lot this is quite a bit of fun thank you so much for watching. look

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