until i was rolled up my dignity 77 percent takes on water slavery shooting a light on the feet of them in the nigerian women in the middle being obscene that's why and where. into prostitution there are stories being told to punch you force me interesting stories. and exclusion of the 77 percent stories of people 17th on t w. i wasn't there when she died she was probably all alone in a dark hospital room and then her life was suddenly over and. the stepped up by the by and i was crying because i was thinking where is the humanity where's the dignity in this pushing this patient into this back.

in 1st day a book it's unbelievable to see your poem the lying all the energy in her body and again. these are because there's so much i want to do and i have dreams i want to live. live with just carry on the living need us to move on you can't die along with every patient who doesn't make it that's how it is still. a funeral during the cold 19 pandemic a small. group of mourners are keeping their distance there are no hunks no

comforting about others just a final memory. my dad had a fall on christmas eve at night and he broke his leg and was taken to hospital by the emergency doctor are they tested him and he was positive for city. and so he was put on the covert unit. and then things got really hard opt of us had specially of each. offered rob died 11 days later without his family being able to see or speak to him again. he had been married for 64 years had children and grandchildren a family man alone in a hospital room in ports time as his life ended. up for so i tried to talk to the nurses to a doctor but they kept saying oh it's a holiday there's no one here someone will be in touch it was really difficult so i

thought ok and the next day i called and kept calling then suddenly i got a call from my brother that the hospital had called him to say that our dad had died. but if i feel guilty because i should have just done it for the family but i didn't manage to reach them and i keep picturing him all alone in his room. i was being too trusting too considerate to nice kids whenever i called they'd say there's a staff change over or there's no doctor here right now at 6 i'd say no problem i'll call back that was the problem i should have been more assertive but now it's too late. we only tie our own death once what we experienced out of our loved ones over and over the feelings of guilt failure and helplessness have all grown during this pandemic. let's get the main. a lot of

people are experiencing these feelings of guilt. and i try to free them of these feelings to encourage them to look at what they heard when the person was alive to the relationship they had to not to put so much emphasis on those final days that it's hot. those final days are too much schneider's daily work he runs an intensive care unit in simpleton berg in southern brandenburg one of germany's covert 1000 hotspot here he needs to take a few deep breaths breathing is the your voluntary process that keeps us all alive he has lost many patients the pandemic overwhelmed everyone here including him. we talk about death rates death statistics. 1000 deaths a day. but even i can put it in perspective yes in

a 24 hour shift i witness 10 deaths that is my reality here that is what is really happening here what's real. but we can't transport this reality to people outside just by quoting numbers from. the house of cards. and then out of this michael cult this spilling out of the miss frances is the most difficult thing for me what has really changed is that we go to the patients fully covered in protective clothing to accompany them as they die look as if we can't really touch them there's no skin contact or holding their hand or that's really miss that i would never have expected it. so sugar to. not let milk. says ina pink can't count how many people she has seen die. yet graphically with that the coffee is hot ok yeah.

ok clinic has been pushed to the limit for months now relatives are not allowed to come close to the highly contagious patients even if it is the last chance to see them before they don't work there is. nothing to give my test as nurses we do our best to stand in for the relatives but what's missing is a few personal words what we can't do that because we haven't known the patients for years or some of the relatives tell their patients that it's ok for them to go . lekan say that too but of course the patients feel the difference when we say it was that when their relatives say it really tells them they can let go the last and it's. up to now the team has had to keep functioning in an emergency situation and no one knows how much longer it will last it's an extreme experience which has brought the team closer together.

many of the emotions which had to break out erupted here in the unit that sort of it was something we had never experienced before as i think every member of staff here has broken down and cried in the corridor or at least once who are white hot. for selling a pink to there was a moment in the pandemic that changed everything for her. one spot us asked the pups and it was the 1st patient who died who i had to put into a body bag. that was when. awful for me to miss a step that i was crawling because i was thinking where is the humanity in this where is the dignity in this putting the patient into this bag is it so they just thought it was a feeling where i thought no this is not why i became in some time it was too close to the power. not always being able to

save people's lives is not unusual for doctors and nurses it is part of everyday life in the intensive care unit but the coronavirus has opened a new dimension does it to it so it was thought there was this situation where you had to think about calling relatives 10 times within 24 hours to tell them that somebody had died it was. so important writing 10 death certificates it's going they all have the same diagnosis or it's more the same on the 8th or 9th call to the family you start to doubt your ability to deliver the news with the kind of empathy you'd like to have with you what's a preventable discovery. or benson's work involves trying to see the light in dark times as a funeral director and grief there appears she prioritizes self-determined dying and grieving she worries about how dying has changed with the coronavirus.

ending is this above all death has become much lonely i think that's what hurts people the most not just those who are dying but also they left once that they can't say goodbye because they can't have physical contact but a visiting rules are so strict that making dying even how difficult that zorra bends has a video blog about death and mourning for which she produces films which she calls coffin stories. she says her aim is to do bridges. as a minister when i get the news that someone's died then at 1st it's just something in my head so the way from my head to my hut is so much longer than just the distance between my hands it can be very helpful and comforting to really feel it to grow. but to really grasp it you have to be close by which the

rooms of the pandemic do not allow. in berlin. experience that 1st hand when the virus claimed his mother's life. i took 4 weeks off from everything i was written off sick and then i just spent 4 weeks a grieving lost in my thoughts. i thought about my mom and about the finite nature of life and this. is why i'm still there i wasn't there when she died. she was probably all alone in a dark hospital room and then her life was suddenly over that's not how anyone wants to leave this world and this is this and also.

i kept thinking how could she have caught the virus and she never left the care home she was in her wheelchair or in bed she was always on the same floor and i thought what if she caught it from me i had these thoughts what if i in fact that her and what i always went really close to her although i was wearing a mask when i put my hand in front of my mouth and talked to her as best i could i'd never be able to forgive myself i couldn't. play paul never displayed any covert 19 symptoms but back then he was never tested to pay. being responsible for his mother's death still haunts him as does the thought of her lonely and anonymous death just a statistic in the pandemic his mother. says she died on october 31st and on the 1st of november i heard the statistics. i don't recall the numbers exactly but at the end there was

a one and i thought that number one of the end and that's my mom. he wasn't allowed into the hospital where she died so he couldn't be at her side he could only say goodbye at her grief distance and i decided to write her a letter and i put the letter into are great for me and that was a ritual a way of saying goodbye. now he visits her grave regularly. but i haven't processed my grief yet it's been snowing for me it's all very new for me and it was taking a long time. i come here once a week even if it's only for 10 minutes or so and from if i think the cemetery here is beautiful and i live nearby i often go shopping in the market hall nearby and i

think this is the right place for her still i can wave at her when i go past. here in this care home the power in southern germany people have not processed their grief either normally it's an open care home but today its core doors are deserted 17 residents died at the start of the pandemic can you laura and her husband were infected he did not survive. the seizure i was so sleepy. it all happened so fast doc while all of a sudden he was gone i couldn't do anything about it mixer big mark and i couldn't really say goodbye to him he'd already been moved on wheels and then a nurse called me and told me that he was on a ventilator but he didn't want to go and what did i think of that or just in the shift so i said well if he's fighting it and he doesn't want it with all finished.

go. 50 years abruptly ended without comfort without consultation without human contact 1st before i didn't like it but it's not in our hands school. no one was allowed to enter or leave the home presidential unit one was turned into an isolation ward too many patients were infected the bed vacated by one of doors husband was needed again immediately contact say he saw that's really how it happened the husband died in hospital and i had to tell the use of his death after it most and that same afternoon we had to move 3 of the residents to. basically on the isolation ward fully packed it was a truly awful moment i just want guns guns surely moment. for

weeks on end the people in the home had to find a way to manage between functioning and grieving. but in valley we weren't expecting it at all on the high it was in our residential community and it hit us like a tornado a lot of sockets my we were powerless to stop it i did mark it was we had all the protective measures we followed all the rules but still so many of our residents caught it had sort of were so many deaths it was very hard for us this last 4 months yeah sure hop back. no one was expecting this young woman's death either she had no underlying health conditions the funeral took place among her closest family members but it was just a click away which is how she would have wanted it. written your karma a young influencer from hamburg lived in and for social networks she addressed her

last public words full of hope to her fans and followers. whoever is with me knows no grief whoever knows me can only laugh and forget their troubles at least for a short while with god's help i will get through this. almost 2 weeks later brittania died of covert 19 she was just 29 her life was snatched from her says her fiance a man you know they had plans they wanted to celebrate their wedding they had their lives ahead of them. let's unleash stunned enough come the season at the end when i got the news that she hadn't made it off that i was allowed to go and see her to say goodbye but. long another says it's a cliche. on 1st day of it's really unbelievable to see your partner lying or know

with no energy in her body. and the gear that's on fire i wouldn't wish that our own anyone interest me one. man who wishes he could have held her hand once more when she was still alive that he could have been by her side now he has friends and his faith to give him strength in his time of grief or feel for the beaten pray for shows. together. put in every free minute we find if we pray for. i'm sure us that we will stay side. but she's still with us in all forms and that makes the loss a little easier for us to pay. for. the patience admitted to the co but intensive care unit in this stuttgart hospital are getting younger we were often here in the 1st wave when most of the patients were over 80 but now many are around 65 and

often have spent weeks here. i show you a journey has the units nursing staff at the moment her patients can only sense the empathy she feels for them. toilets had recently a patient said to me she must you know you do so much for me this that if i met you on the street i wouldn't recognize you it's with finished apprentice it upsets me that i wouldn't recognize you with this i wouldn't even be able to thank you because i can see your face shall become deceased so even now imagine how that is for the patient they have to trust you although they can't see your face but often i should knows nothing about her patients either because they are in a coma and their relatives are not allowed to visit them elizabeth has been here since mid december after weeks in a coma she is fighting her way back to life likely my colleague will open up the

speaking valve here and then you can communicate with us with all community are you going how do you know hello everyone. in her hearing her speak means a lot to her family was there you know it's only since he's here and phone and they've been there for me since the beginning. but no one is allowed to come in coleman otherwise they'd be a hit every day that said see right here oh yes it does how does it have you been able to talk with your family yes we've already spoken on the phone i can do that clownish how was it should lovely really really lovely. and i've gone back with them since he did. you know. so it's patients like elizabeth to give i sure hope this fandom ache has been the

biggest challenge of her professional life the 49 year old is a marathon runner so she's used to the long home but her view of life has changed. so that makes you really pensive for that you are aware of how fragile it is humans are very fragile so you do all you can instill you lose the saudis or. the court death is a part of life then we just carry on smoking live for fight on and leave the living need us to us who can die along with everything and who doesn't make it too that's how it is so. while we were following i shared work a 63 year old died on the 18 bed unit i sure had an admitted her a few days earlier still optimistic about beating the virus. family counselor class has invited the relatives to bid farewell. we'll ask him if

death is a lonely one. business trustee process we don't know what the patients are really aware of we just don't know and they get medication to calm them down to stop the pain and the breathing difficulties. so bizarre we say that this shuts down their sense of what's around them. there is often what we don't know what they really feel for us book authors it's good for the maybe they sense something on a higher level than we know ones so i really don't know if it's lonely or zionist. amid all the darkness hospital chaplain chef on pfeiffer has to give the people comfort and support he finds it in his face. but the 57 year old knows that's not true of everyone some cases have affected him especially deeply. it's been formed by now i was called into the intensive care units before christmas by

a young woman 35 years old and seriously ill with coziest said start our current vancouver ignorance in simulation of missy she wanted to have a blessing to her has always entering her room but the woman still had her phone in hand she was just saying goodbye to her husband she knew she was about to be sedated because she would be put on a ventilator and would no longer be conscious she didn't know whether she would survive it was autonomous. or start the needle on top this i stood next to her and heard the telephone call to us it was heartbreaking and sleaze an obvious normal. prosecutor what i've heard into the prayer and gave the blessing to both her and her husband and the tears were rolling down her face and slit as it then it all went very fast she was sedated and put on a ventilator it was very affecting. the patient survived but as

a cleric i'm fine for knows how important farewells are for the grieving process it's an issue which occupies him a lot currently not everyone is willing to go through with his pain at the end. i also hear some people say my mother is dying can you come and give last rites thing and then i say please come and say goodbye to her and i say no i can't do it because of the coronavirus or that i feel they sometimes use it as an excuse that worries me because i wonder how they will green involved with this if they've missed this chance it's really important to say goodbye to the person you love someone who's had such an impact on your life it's a minimum. stephon goal survived coated but only just now he's fighting for every breath in physio therapy after $108.00 days in the i.c.u. in a clinic in munich his lung is seriously damaged. but as i go

into a minute and you really feel your limits it's a huge problem just to climb the stairs also afterwards i feel like i have to read then more air than can possibly fit into my bloodstream because all these interfaces have been badly damaged by the virus that was going through the shittiest. nollywood in the home to take them recently they did a c.t. scan and the radiologist said your lung doesn't look good there are some parts missing or holes as he put it and that i should think about getting a transplant why that huntsman took so long stefan goal is still haunted by his coma dreams his late mother but also strangers appeared to him in that world between my life and death. if that which does it i saw myself on the wire. there was no t.v. but i saw what they were doing to me with about a 10 minute time delay and i thought to myself if you can still see this then

you're not dead yet you can see what they're doing to you your mom. the 64 year old's life is not like it was before his illness his lungs kidneys and heart have all suffered damage he was in an artificial coma for over 2 months and underwent 3 into beige and belief and we don't know when i woke up out of my coma stockers and nurses came from all over to see me they were glad i was alive so. if i feel a great sense of belonging to this country because they really look after the people who live here all i can say is it's brilliant if i were in england or america i'd probably be either dead or totally broke by now. patients like stefan gold who survive the virus are a ray of hope for hospital staff it helps to see that their work is worthwhile in spite of all the deaths. oh hello dr. thanks for everything great to see you super i'm feeling much better. it's

wonderful to see you standing here in front of us without any kind of help. the rest will follow 2 there is still dynamic yes there is still dynamic left. 76 days in a coma was he afraid of dying. and i know. that i thought there's so much i still want to do i still have dreams i want to live up to though i never thought that i'd give up i wanted to see my children grow up and i have other dreams. fungal made it but so far nearly 80000 other people in germany didn't so many goodbyes in times of social distancing what can relatives do if they're not allowed to go. and see the deceased bents has produced a video reconstructing scenes with a friend. and i would encourage everyone to ask the nurses to take a cut off a lock of hair or take a fingerprint you can do that with an end pad and

a sheet of paper it doesn't take too much time i. was. that way you have something to look at something to touch to feel that someone's dilators. thinks it's time for us to deal more openly with death. when i really wish is that along with all the tragedy the pandemic has brought us maybe we can spot a few opportunities for instance to charles to ask how we want to say goodbye and what is important what maybe we should bring the deceased a little closer to us because we realize now how important it is to say goodbye

with all of our senses that it's time for a discussion about this that's what i wish. the pandemic as an opportunity to talk about the end of life 1000 has changed how we die and it will leave its mark for a long time to come. the

from. over a 1000 years ago bush huge construction frenzy sweeps across europe. the roman empire lives on if only in architecture. the rulers erect magnificent sacred building. contest of the cathedral part one of the romanesque period. 15 minutes long t w. we've got some hot tips for your bucket list. the magic corner. that's hard for some such as and some great culture memorials to boot.

the be. the but. you news live from berlin and more than 3000000 infections in hospitals pushed to the limits as coded 1000 infections store in germany. federal government lays out plans to centralize more power as the regions fail to bring the crisis under control. also coming up tensions running high in the u.s. city of minneapolis as demonstrators to file a curfew for

a 2nd night to protest against the killing by police of another young black man the officer lead.