she has a dream oh, calling her to leave everything below. ah, in 45 minutes on d, w. a scoring we say they were about giving up sports life every weekend on d. w. hello and welcome to the 77 percent. my name is edith kimani and i'm coming to you from the heart of no ruby in the special edition of the 77 percent. we're going to talk about love relationships and of course, hot break. we'll find out what attracts people to each other,

to ignite that special spark. ah, we'll hear how back. so like money and power planes relationship with and we'll meet the designer who wants people to read them. don't know much of their sexual orientation. ah. mm. so we know that money can complicate things in a partnership like when love or sex. i used as an exchange for money. we're talking here of course, about sponsors bless us or sugar mom isn't daddy. so we want to stick a closer look at the blessed a blessed the culture, specifically in south africa. and some young women opened up to us about the experience i shot wanting though this next report discusses dependency relationships and sexual violence. ah ah, when she started her studies 23 year old and a plunder and tumble from so widow was struck by the expensive looks clothing and

excess of shopping, her fellow classmates enjoying her friends was so cold. li, queens who depend on rich men to maintain that lifestyle, introduced her to her own bless, of a wealthy married man who was more than 20 years. her senior he was c, i'm his clean will begin to live shooting the re prophy know her. but the gifts did not come for free and humble, soon discovered that she needs to perform sexual faded. this is when she started having 2nd thought, like, doing really want kind of just felt like i was be invited into, sorry, but type of prostitution. but then now i have to make do with whatever just come by

just because of the fact that she wants his life that you want you want last life lavish, no luxurious, a soft allies, all the struggle to survive in a society where money and how a concentrated in the hands of men, in tumble is not allied. some man even believe money gives him the right to control a woman's freedom. 46 road modular villa kazi has 3 mistresses. he does not allow them to work, leave the house without his permission or earn his cellphone woman easily. 1010. so we need to control that. they need to be in your finger tips. as we like for, for me, i always go into school so that i can have money. i can have power, i can control them that his behavior might entirely undermine his girlfriend's.

right. to self determination seems a little concerned too, because he both he and his friends claim to pay the girlfriends around 400 years each for cbo mcclung who this is pure business. i mean that's the whole point. so do we know what we, what we do is we take care of women, then they, what do we get into 10 is love. that's all. that's all. nothing else. so your insight move. yes, sex has been taken care of to someone making you feel special. in a recent south african health survey, one in 10 young women reported to have had transactions. this is a massive problem. it says also jackie. pamela say, we meet the author in an upmarket hotel in johannesburg, but what say is well known for her book, which spills the beans on the blessing and bless the culture, but more say, experienced the fluid borders between transactional sex and human trafficking. i've

read one of you one or 2 with this hotel and you'd be a, you were listed as a lima. i remember older that are written with on as a young girl. she ran away from a violent time and became involved with a very wealthy man, a few months into their relationship. he took her on a private yacht with politicians, business men, and their mistresses, being trapped in the middle of the ocean, she had no choice but to enjoy being raped multiple times. you can be changed it like this. in a heartbeat, if the minister wants to buy you, they'll buy you regardless of who you dating in the group. so even if you're dating the wal mad in the group, he can trade you off a business deal because the ministers after 4 traumatizing years,

a mont saint managed to escape the grasps of have lesser. she fled abroad, wishing, wrote a book about her experiences, a warning that the world of glamour that we see on our phones and internet platforms is sometimes far from the actual truth. social media give us an invasion of fiction comfort and luxury expected. and people hopeful that lucius and you don't even know that just to get ahead there. got this drink in front of us. what are the maybe other things did you have to do? just for that one? it me back in. so wet la, cause he meets his girlfriend will be late tomorrow. he wants to buy her and you hand bag, which is nice. but zima is not early enough for the luxuries she has a baby and needs the money to buy basic necessities to pay rent. and she's well aware of the dependency she finds herself in bed as bianco. we have to be sleeping all the guys and pretended though for you all you okay with every big

just because of minute. because i round here chances of jobs you don't. there are a preventative of getting age, all right, on hit do anything and everything to good idea of how you either sit in time in place with a post curve economy in shatters and then the unemployment rate of over 60 percent . the outlook for these young women is bleak, being blessed becomes a basic way of survival and the female body an object that can be bought and bartered. but of course, not all relationships, so this complicated and well money often plays a role is often about simpler things like who gets to pay for the bill on the dates . so we wanted to know what your experiences were. and for this we went to millennium park in a gotcha. i spoke to bills when it comes to green

o. o d awesome guys that just finished a picture like before too. too much. oh yeah. yeah. well yeah, we are not able to pay for i dont have been times where you want to have more than the most expensive listen to want to go to. and then by time you can like this one as of right something i like. how much is a deal again? i mean, you're calculating your, you know, get you back home because i can afford to mueller, she took out the, someone, i couldn't finish the food annual like, you must finish it. carol who to left. all right. like almost finished, you really nice ones. it doesn't red flags like, oh, you tell me, i must finish people because it weighs more than banging and i have no idea how i would behave if somebody forced me to finish my food because they were paying for the bill. but you know what dating aside, we also wanted to find out what attracts people to each other and what makes

relationships work. so here's what you said. one thing that draws me so on. if i knew the other person likes to be a respect smith, i saw i saw the issue was brianna. nobody in particular job. he's personally i guess dorothy maybe came to his grade level of my life. she was always there for me just of what they need the time like i've never had such support over my life. he's on this, let me see on this to me. and whenever he's wrong, he do apologize. that the most amazing part of it. interesting to me she was always with his job. i mean, oh, don't dish or about me. you're about me this year, your money run away. and when he asked me that was like, like, you know, that why didn't you like me? and if maybe we can do this issue with there are

a 1000000 different tweets to love. and who you choose to love should really only be a matter for you. and your partner, but in life, this isn't always the case. your family, friends, society and even national laws can you tell me who you can and can't have an intimate relationship with, as well as who you can identify as i'm talking about the l g, b, c, q plus community. we're still faces discrimination as well as defamation. and attacked by both states and society all around africa. so let's start off by unpacking gender identity and sexual orientation and what the letter stand for. we ask and relationship, but can break it down for us. the hello there and welcome to the spread of faith space where we get to discuss everything, facts and relationship. today we have a question on gender and sexual diversity. the question reads, hey kev, as a person trying to be a better l g b t q plus ally. i'm finding it hard to understand all the new language around

agenda, sexuality and sex. is there a way you can simplify it for me? so i can better understand how to conduct myself in spaces where i meet diverse group. i'd really appreciate it. thanks. let's start by creating 3 boxes, biological or assigned sex, gender, and sexual orientation. each of these boxes has many sub sections, but we'll focus on the most important points. the fast box, biological sex, is what the doctor uses to identify you at birth based on your genital. yeah, most of the time it's either male or female, but there are also cases where one is born with both male and female genitalia, that person is known as intersects the 2nd box, is gender. gender is a social construct. if what society throws you to place you in a binary box of either male or female, for example,

all and the color pink are said to belong to only girl, whereas trucks and the color blue are set to belong to only boys. but not everybody conforms to this gender. binary gender identity comes from your in a sense of self and may not aligned with the sex that you were assigned at birth. you could be male, female, both neither or some other agenda. and this could mean, for example, that you're not comfortable with a pronouns, he or she and would rather be referred to as they or them. for example, the 3rd box is sexual orientation. this has to do with the attraction that you have to a person based on their agenda, which could be romantic, emotional, or physical men. and women strictly attracted to the opposite gender, and known as heterosexual. if you're attracted to some of the same gender, you could be homosexual. if you're attracted to someone regardless of their sex or gender identity,

you could be pansexual. keep in mind that this really is just the tip of the iceberg. this so much more to learn about the l g b p q plus community. i hope this has been helpful and i do urge you to keep doing your research online. well informed allies like you are very important. that's it for me, kaz till next time. goodbye. thank you kaz. and if you're interested in learning more about special minority or just indicating yourself about sex on the body in general, you can have to integrate page where we have a series of kaz on just that. now hearing kenya between 2 people of the same gender is still punishable by law. the law has been in place since 930 and result in sexual minority being harassed and left with virtually no protection from police of the state. in january 2023, a young tenant question design and l g b, you activate. and when she logo was killed, walking white, red b a. the unity. we've talked to some people who are still willing to speak up

can yes l g b t q community is on alert. in january 2023 ed. when to lowball, a student fashion designer and gay rights activist was killed in the canyon town of l. dorit his tragic death sent shock waves through the community makeup artist denison gary. felt the impact ah, when, when the new came, you know, like i was much so what's happened and been and i was like, i really hope it's not about how he had been favor themselves as of late. there's been a lot of hit. i've been receiving a lot of hits and a lot of comparison to anyone. everyone is telling me, you know, if you don't take care, you'll end up like edwin. dennis was always aware that his sexual orientation was not accepted by society. but the online debate about edward's death has degenerated

into an anti l g b t q plus hate campaign. right now, are they at martinez came that 10th before not short of 50 of their pictures of their sexual orientation and deadlock clue even simply leaving the house can be a problem. they're not safe to go outside. you're not as sure that you'd be safe unless you have the unity but they environment and they and the situation right now will be run rob wall in 10. and it will take some time before we get back to our home. but if the government criminal life is hate to lead minority groups, i feel like that i will feel protected. homosexuality is still at her bu and kenyan society. but in the light of edwin's death, the l. g. b, t q plus community and the allies are once again calling for acceptance. and the

criminalization. there's a lot of homophobia. there's a lot of hate to add people who, who's only who, who are hating because they exist. you know, they exist. that's it. i leave, i'm leaving, i'm gay through play most fuss of africa. the laws are very similar to those here in kenya, in a jury for example, one can get up to 14 years in prison meant for being gay. and in some parts of the country which are ruled by fleming sharia law, punishment even was nevertheless, there are few brave people with sending up for themselves. we meet one of them, the legal space, fashion designer, daniel can care who is calling for more respect and acceptance. in conservative nigeria, same sex relationships, who if the wholesale wild for the l g b to q plus community. but like ocean teenager daniel concord has an idea to make

it a little friendlier with these inclusive question brand case apparel who's very much enthusiastic about so so this coming this on the prison. i think personally i was going to, we're going to so i had one disrespect to discrimination on 3 percent. so growing up, i always been like will lead and all of that. so i got to read more and i found out about what to do. i've always been a 1st time i have to pick up on myself. despite the odd lucas brand has been welcomed, especially in the l g. b t q plus community. bold inscriptions like fem isn't weakness. gender is fluid and weird can be seen happening, hung out around lego. i think it's quite an innovative and intrusive brand. i've always had a hard time finding stuff,

fit my gender expression. like with the 5th run. it always it go get. i always find what i want. accomplishment of one, my bronze out and it was going to be like, my good. how do you mean 10 days students stuff and i'm like, yes. then there's a. so can you, anybody kind of like, i mean, the way it person isn't, is owned by the or the own body. and the thought they need to switch from sees operating, very, very bold come from. so, and as each taking this course uni kind of society where we leaving, it always seems like this done, you know, runs an online store from his home. he reveals designs on his instagram page. clients can also request designs. daniel then gets a graphic artist to realize the work before supervising the ceiling and branding. experiencing hostility is part of the job efficiency right offensive. i some people

just come into my business page and just be like what's up? why are you doing this? is beverly, this begins go through and what and what's not on whatsoever. didn't people don't understand is my brand is notes for the, for the particular presence my brand before every body and for his friends and customers wearing his clothes in steals a sense of pride. and i don't read my discretion to ask why you are in company like this. what does this mean? no, right. but then i understand it's coming from a bit of ignore on. so most of the time i see the and i kid demo. what things mean people find the scripts done with a k to but i really didn't care. this is me and i little bit a man with a message. and while people like daniel fighting from one step to the society,

many people have their own relationship battle to fight big or small, like cooley and get their attention nigeria and couple living right here they ruby . and while they knew they wanted to be together, their families and friends, well, they took a bit of convincing nairobi as east africa. melton port attract and residence from across the continent and beyond. but i couldn't get capitals acceptance of diversity. that's not always extend to matters of the heart of the beginning. it was very difficult when my wife go to places an individual or a manager. and yet it was like, whoa, used to be a very huge stereotype by dancing oh, you've come to can to steal our woman from all cooler and get to a cross cultural relationship. maybe unusual. but like many young people love familiar with med too. i think. yeah,

awesome into 2 years colleges, fresh from school, he talked me and you knew how you say d t and talking and yeah i which is why p like by vibe. he actually up front. he told me you're going to be the mother of my kids. for neighbors, friends, and family, the new capos bought in love, connection was difficult to accept. i was now telling my friends to know these, that dating. you know, you're not telling a lot of people. and then, you know, come out front her. yeah, i met this guy, we've been seeing each other and i'm like his name jan. donaley. what i sure. my dear, what do you know about him loud? you know his back or he'll leave you today. comments like these will fall on deaf ears, yet whose family have long since accepted west african in law as a member of the form. but wasn't always the case. when he told me that 80 no, to delete a seat wat ignore to gleick. he said,

i don't want to hear anything about it. i want you to think i was in grammy when she told me nigeria and i was like, what is amazing and doing, can i know africa go to america or europe. so that was for me, my mind glue. another thing that i had was his muslim. okay. and my sister is krisha. so he really misses there's going to cause of, i know my sister, i really love him. some like i were to become mostly eventually the couple of chose to put aside they may see us, but yet douse behind them. the per for a head to was a shared life. that blends the best of that different backgrounds include in, in the kitchen at the beginning is to cook a lot, especially when road like i'm visiting him at his place. he used to really, really like cooking, you know, i guess that there a time he was trying to lou or me is like them. we cook for you. my wife. he taught

me how to make this to ensure law of their fire dries over time. i've come to enjoy most of the current dishes from a guy leave room morkie mall from below from from mike. ok. ever do whatever you going from regardless of your background, your cultural, your age, whatever it is, your type. it is possible. he lets me be me and i let him be here. it walks for me perfectly. and we will just happy with when any of the end of our show. but we have one more issue to talk about that hot break, because like, you know, not, that's all, some relationships and need the most. i mean, i can't be alone in showing you, you must have some experiences of your own. so let's hear them. well,

it may not be shown to be times i may have walked out in a living have been before i think i'm the one actually i'm interested in a given me a good with us today. so you just go through them. i just have you with the read log in, i believe to read this robert bud with article out the this particular the i will never forget because i believe you are, which i wait for that particular is written for her. for like a long i shall not feel. i felt very, very lovely. undoubtedly that i believe i would never forget. i get all my trust a ball. just take it for granted. and then it's off my head because yes, i'm a footballer. like if i go to the beach, i'll perform well, like my guys

a black. okay. was wrong with to like, why you why, you know, focus to be it was wrong or deep dive it out or? yeah, fine to me. i feel i'm, i'm doing my best. i didn't know. i wasn't doing the right thing on the peach, i get my bride, end of the i ended up losing sight. i didn't get a lot of bike and return like my trust was taking for granted. so i just have to like exclude my thought, the relationship to them. but out by the it was funny. so since then, i swore not to have any relationship a 100 percent to get out to be extremely careful in order for me not to like pull a big thing for the 2nd time, but i don't know how it is and that brings us to the end of the show this week, if you have story to share with us, connected us on social media, you can also write to us. so he will is 7 to 7 the d w dot com and subscribe to our youtube channel. we have you now with, you know, the do by now a big so thanks for watching. mm.

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[000:00:00;00] with who are growing up in mongolia but good is 10 years old. and to love life in the gobi desert. oh,

i hate but she has a dream calling her to leave everything below. ah, it's 15 minutes on d, w one, making the headlights and what's behind them. dw news africa. the show that's actually issues shaping the continent. life is slowly getting back to normally on the street to give you enough reports on the inside. our cars funds is on the ground reporting from across the continent and all the trend stuff, the mazda you. mm. even 90 minutes on d. w. ah,

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initiative is pushing to make it happen. me personally, it's just a dream. i always had. i've always wanted to see the us for destiny for space starts more change on d w. ah ah ah, this is the w news alive from berlin, nigeria, head to the post african largest democracy is choose and it's new presidents to date. lot on 90000000 people have registered to cast the boat. they would ask for the latest one. also coming up. oh, love shoals is welcomed by india prime minister. i'm that i'm already on his