[000:00:00;00] children are happy and everything makes a very good impression on those who saw them in the first days, but we also test all adult participants with the help of psychologists, we do tests at the beginning and at the end, and by the difference in the results of these tests, we can see the positive dynamics of the psycho-emotional state, this is all recorded in the reports of the methodologists psychologists and we have these reports during his last year. well, first of all, where did the programs come from ? and for example, now it is possible that we are being watched by women with children who have experienced some very serious trauma, who were in the occupied territories and want to contact you, for example. that is, you started talking

about the fact that you are trying to select certain women, how does this selection take place, how do the women know they they have somewhere to go they have somewhere to fill out a certain questionnaire how do you find out about these women and where do you look for them or can they find you personally we are not looking anymore they find you because this program is already known on the internet it is on it the link is called recovery during the war, if you type in any search engine recovery during the war in facebook or just in google, you can find a link to this program, all the criteria by which we recruit women and children for this program are listed there and there is a google questionnaire which must be filled out and the questionnaire also indicates which categories of criteria we can accept after that when it is all gathered in our computers a special commission yes, i do not

decide even though the head of the program i do not decide who goes to the program and who does not is social the commission in which there are such well-known humanitarians, there are representatives of the sponsors, there is a doctor of psychological sciences from the institute of psychology of the academy of pedagogical sciences, it is the commission on compliance with the criteria that selects people for this program. that is, you select them only based on questionnaires. again, he conducts some kind of testing in order to understand whether this woman needs rehabilitation or not, and maybe you then divide them into certain groups because we know that the psychological state of each person can be different, as well as children. well, let's talk about it in detail. the questionnaire is relatively small, which is filled out by people who want

to enter our program, but with it we already see a lot of information. it is not widely available, but the commission has access to this questionnaire and it judges swimmers. we all have a large group of volunteers, more than 30 people, and if necessary, volunteers conduct interviews with future participants and find out various details also, volunteers fill out a long questionnaire that is required for psychologists and post it on a resource that is only available to psychologists , that is, to two or three of the program’s leaders. again, this is personal data, we will protect it further . volunteers also conduct tests . volunteers to conduct psychological preliminary testing of future

participants, because then we can see the level of all their emotional states how much stress they have the main thing is not what we see, the main thing is that psychologists see all these parameters the commission concludes that in about a month these 40 women and children can be selected for the next project, which starts in about a month. this is how the selection takes place. after that , the volunteers contact these people again and prepare them for the move. what are the features of the location that we have chosen for the next project

? we have six locations in western ukraine and we are filling them one by one. will tell you about psychological rehabilitation because it is very important to choose the right team because, uh, everyone, as we have already said, with you and we talked before, all women and children are in different psychological states, so you need to take into account and who is this team, this psychologists , doctors and how did you select them first of all, these are psychologists, as i already said. we had experience of cooperation with psychologists since the 90s . i know many psychologists, and when we were preparing for the program in march-april last year, we collected a database and which then it was constantly replenished, and now my database has more than 200 psychologists, among them 112 worked last year on our projects , not every psychologist gets into our project. it is a matter of finding money, organizing locations and finding teams that will be there

. the psychologists themselves do the work. we have an expert group of psychologists who review the resumes of those psychologists who send us. because they already know about our program and they they select from among them those who, in their opinion, are like fish. they conduct an interview with them and after that they make such a verdict that this psychologist this psychologist can take part in the work in our program. but after already 27 projects. it is also important for us that the psychologist has at least two years of experience working with war trauma, it is very important to call our project, which has been working for three weeks with participants in

the psychological rehabilitation program, it is still too early the first stage of psychological rehabilitation, which consists in the stabilization of the psycho-emotional state in psychological support provided by psychologists, as well as in the audit of training, because a woman, even after she leaves our project and returns somewhere , sometimes even to the area of ​​operations, she must understand, know how to behave in in a stressful situation, how to help yourself, how to help your children, the people around you, because she already knows a little about various physical practices, about breathing practices that have given up rehabilitation, you also teach women how to react and how to to manage one's psycho-emotional state, but tell me, please. we are talking about women and children, and the situations are different now because we know that men can be in such a state as well. do you accept

men for rehabilitation, and perhaps children who have lost their women during the war in the occupied territories, we had almost no men , we are constant except for rare exceptions, because state organizations work with men, and you are psychologists who work, military psychologists and special ones. they work with soldiers, officers, there are many psychologists who work simply with the men who suffered from the shelling, we took care of those for whom the state does not have time to take care of women and children . it is focused more on men , but we are now approaching the project because we saw this a year ago that when the demobilization of soldiers and officers begins, it will be necessary again, we need to update the format of our program and

implement projects for the rehabilitation of families, psychological rehabilitation of families, two men who came to the front during the year, who was wounded, possibly due to the amputation of moses, major psychological injuries, both the front and injuries and amputation, look, we have very little time for communication, i want to ask you one more question about children, because this is a separate topic in general , and it can be devoted to the entire program. you see and observe these recovery processes, uh, we work with children starting last year from two years old , now from three years old, because it is very difficult to find a teacher, as a rule, children who come to

the project are divided into three groups, the first on we hired children from two to 6 years old, and for them we created a kindergarten. our know-how is exactly for these children. experienced educators work there. to the kindergarten and help the educators with certain games and developmental games to work with these children. there are two groups , one small schoolchildren from 6 to 10 years old and this is a separate children's group that works according to its own rules with child psychologists with each at least two psychologists must work in the group, and there is a group of teenagers - this is from 11 to 17 years old. there are also two psychologists who specialize in working with teenagers, these are certain exercises, also connected with breathing, and

sometimes they are related to table matters, rarely, unlike adults, and this mainly games, and with teenagers there are also reflective classes, because teenagers can take part in individual consultations, children do not take part in individual sessions unless the family asks them to have a family consultation, our psychologists provide such help, and the main work goes through groups, through support groups, through reflection groups, that is, through conversation groups , and so the whole week goes, there are two days off when these project participants have excursions, because these are beautiful places, they also need to rest a little and reflect. the exercises you received received this week and so for three weeks, i want to thank

you for our conversation today , for what you do and what you do, thank you, thank you for your interest in our program. ukrainian and this is also the head of the reconstruction program during the war. and now i want to address all the women who watch our program, who have really experienced psychological trauma, who were in the occupied territories, who lost their loved ones . you can find on the internet how mr. yosif told just here is this program, a program to support women during recovery during the war and to fill out the questionnaire and undergo rehabilitation because it is really very important how to survive the horrors of war and how to find the strength to live on despite everything

reach out to children who have withdrawn into themselves and restore warm, trusting relationships with them how to help children cope with stress and, most importantly, as an adult and a child, to survive the loss of a loved one, we will talk about this right now and contact us nataliya bondarenko, candidate of psychological sciences, teacher of the department school of social work of the kyiv-mohyla academy, practical psychologist of the highest category, mrs. natalya, i congratulate you, i also congratulate the audience, first of all , i want to ask you to share our conversation with you for such two blocks and first we will talk about how to survive the psychological trauma received by a person as a result of shelling and occupation, and only then we will talk about how to survive the loss of a loved one and not lose yourself from grief so we start from the beginning, now a lot of ukrainians become the victims of shelling go

through the horrors of the occupation, and all this, let's say, does not pass without a trace for their psyche, and even when they are in relatively safe places, i say relatively, because now there are no safe places in ukraine places of alarm sound in all areas and an enemy missile can arrive at any moment. therefore, even in relatively safe places, a person cannot forget to experience and these traumatic memories pop up in his thoughts every day, i know that you work with such people and maybe you can now give them advice on how to act how to recover and what to do thank you for your questions, you know i probably didn't simplify our conversation to advice because we've all been living under shelling for a whole year and we

all managed to normalize this life is under threat of death and it is ours the achievements, the achievements of all, we saw that we can still continue our lives , and this is a very great psychological asset . i think that in a year, each of us already has our own algorithms on how to help ourselves during shelling, first of all, and i very much respect these algorithms are actually such a very important experience and this is in principle a growth a-a and i would advise first of all not to neglect the alarm signals and it is necessary to have these alarming suitcases, i know that many have had to

even compile from the first days of the war such suitcases it is very difficult, but they need to be yes, and what do you need to do to help yourself in such moments, minutes of shelling. first, you ensured your safety, yes, and then you are already working to help yourself relieve anxiety , relieve fear, yes. and you can do that, of course, i see these shots i also work on this program, here are wonderful footage of the recovery of our clients. this means breathing exercises. i think most of them already know different breathing exercises. there is a square breathing exercise . when you inhale for four, hold

for four, exhale for four again. delay the main thing is to observe the harmony between inhaling and exhaling and exhaling while doing this with your stomach. in addition to breathing exercises , it is desirable to help yourself through the body. well, the easiest way is to do a massage. these are the points . they are called positive. they are located in the middle of the forehead above the eyes. and if you if you try to do it right now, you will feel such a light relief. well, and most importantly, how can we help ourselves when, uh , anxiety is very high in us - it's through thoughts at the level of thoughts to help ourselves. well, don't screw yourself up, don't

chase the same negative thoughts here in such a way yes. and if we talk about how to survive these shellings and anxiety states. and if we say that a person has already been in the occupied territory, those are the people with whom you work and who provide assistance, but not all women fall into this program of reconstruction during the war there are categories of women who did not get into this rehabilitation, who, for example, filled out the questionnaire, there are those who did not fill out any questionnaires at all, but now they are watching our program and can take something from it for themselves, how can they go through this rehabilitation, how can they be, i understand what is possible not every one of them suffered, but those who feel really white, who feel this brokenness and have lost perhaps some desire to live on and do not know what to do, how to act, well, first of all, i want

to say that in addition to the recovery program during the war, there are many other programs and i have great respect for all colleagues who work in those programs, there are also children's voices, this is a holiday program in the psycho-rehabilitation center near mogilyanka, there are other programs yes, but also if a person feels a shortage of resources and cannot to cope, it is really worth looking for a program, looking for a psychologist, this is all free for, well, for our citizens, and uh, to get such help, if a person is able to help himself, then it is possible to help, as i already said, entering through the body, yes, through the body

, help yourself through thoughts and through behavior because of certain activities, you all know these activities very well, this is also meditation, this is conservation , ecological attitude towards oneself, normalization of nutrition, mandatory sleep, no abuse of chemical substances, at the same time, if uh, a woman has children, she should set an example uh how exactly does she manage to be an example to her children? don't get into chemical dependency , uh, go into, well, if you have a very strong experience of emotions, and helping yourself with help means thoughts. because thoughts are very connected to our emotions. well, at the level of the body

body i said it first, it's breathing exercises, it's nature gave us such a wonderful mechanism that calms anxiety calms anxiety, you can go further and remove excess tension and the remains of anxiety because these are the remains they remain in our physicality in the way we walk and sit -is in our er-er clamped positions yes, even when the shelling ends, even when the occupation is already behind, these clamps remain in the body yes , and clamps even the back er-er back of the legs and er back there is more muscle contraction and ts- this speaks of what a person begins well, problems with the back pain begin and that is why it is very important

to work with the body to help yourself eh well do clapping exercises eh stretches eh go to a massage therapist these are the things mrs. natalie well and probably the most painful thing is the loss of a loved one like experience it as a way to help children accept it the loss of a parent and how to support a person who is in mourning, you know, psychiatrists have a concept of normal grief , normal loss, yes, that is, when a person lives outside the norms, he lives this process of grieving, and the loss is complicated. it is desirable to understand that we are not in

full control of our lives. we cannot be responsible for what happened to our loved ones who left. it is really such a very difficult suffering, but such suffering it happened to us during a peaceful life, and it is about the fact that when a person is upstairs , he not only experiences strong emotional shocks, but also philosophical, existential, hmm, thoughts of the experience rise up in him, and he has to discuss with someone , and it is very desirable not to leave the person with this and give her, well, if she had the opportunity to say it, the opportunity to talk about it, that is, there are two extremes, yes, or the person says i am strong

, i can handle it and does not show that she is experiencing and grieving or she is very strong, grieving yes and these are two touching they are really later will affect her psychological functioning and social functioning. if we talk about children, children know that the parents are not always . well, the mother is usually the one who stayed with the child . she sometimes thinks that it is better not to tell the child that the father died. you won't be able to hide your emotional state from the child and hide it for a very long time because the child feels, well, something strange is happening to her. she doesn't understand what 's happening to these adults who were in

a different emotional state before this, so it's worth it to tell a child that a loved one has died, but you know, if you surround the child with care, if you give her space, take her to clubs so that she can do this ... from the level of mourning, she moves to the level of substitution, and it is easier for the child to become attached to other adult children, in fact, during the recovery program, children told our child psychologists, i love you

. yes, that is, they immediately become attached. childhood is a time when, er, they are trained to feel joy and cannot be stopped, if a child is happy, laughs, er, plays something, then let her do it, it is useful for her , er, the situation is more difficult with teenagers, because teenagers are already in they have such a powerful brain. they think about everything philosophically, they have such. there can be various discussions in the head , that is why teenagers should be supported to discuss with them, but it is very, very necessary not to transfer part of some responsibilities of grief to teenagers. yes,

for example, to collect dad's things and take there where to go well, where is the burial, for example, yes, it should be a child on the one hand , uh, mother can be happy that the children are such adults who help them, you can say everything with them , you can share these experiences, but such a child will be unhappy later, it is, well, not that one if the burden they have to bear ms. natalya, i want to thank you for our conversation today and for your advice, i hope that our e-viewers will listen to them, thank you thank you and i remind you that we were contacted by nataliya bondarenko, candidate of psychological science teacher of the department school of social work of the kyiv-mohyla academy practically a psychologist of the highest category surviving the war is emotionally difficult but we were left with no other choice with you and each of us holds this

psychological front every day, overcoming stress and despair, the emotional swing should not knock out the three of us because the war continues and you and i have to win, so hold on and take care of yourself, i'm iryna koval and we'll see each other , it's hard to talk about what you feel when you have urinary incontinence, an unpleasant situation can occur at any time even from a slight effort, fortunately - this is behind me uro feminost helped me thanks to the natural ingredients uro feminost helps to restore control over urination day and night now i feel confident uro feminost urination under control buy with

a 10% discount in pharmacies, pharmacy mc pharmacy a penny yes, cinema, television, sport, music, education, free people have a choice, choose what you want on megogo . and what do you think about lacalut fix? the price is good, the right choice for my pension, a new cream for expressive fixation of dentures and healthy gums. so, your choice is to fix the most important events, events that are happening right now and affect our lives, of course , the news feed reports about them, but it is not enough

to know what is happening, you need to understand antin berkovsky and the invitation experts soberly assess the events , analyze them, modeling our near future, every saturday at 1:00 p.m. with a repeat at 10:00 p.m. studio event with anton borkovsky naispresso my greetings to all those who work for the press, this is news and begins with the situation in the regions of donetsk under fire in the morning and at night, the enemy shelled settlements along the entire front line of the five-peace residents wounded russians launched a rocket attack on kostyantynivka damaged a kindergarten four high-rise buildings in mankivka destroyed a school in the turkish and soledar community