take that, andy levy. only 5% said jeb bush. that's it for us tonight. thank you for being with us. donald trump among our guests here tomorrow evening. please join us as always. we thank you for being with us tonight. good night from new york ♪ ♪ kennedy: hey there, what do you know there? you know what i watched today? i watched joe biden's announcement he is not running for president and waiting for doc brown and marty mcfly to crash the rose garden in a delorean. as you know today is "back to the future" day. plenty of people could use the delorean to transport them to various and convenient points in time. of course the second person that comes to mind is madam retro herself, former secretary of state hillary clinton. she would obviously set the date in that thing for 1996 when she and bill clinton were still clutching power and perpetual pre-election mode and

pre-lewinsky and of course blaming everything on republicans. >> something very familiar about all this. kennedy: that's right, old, biff. that is creative harpy is stuck in time warp and politics are from worn out almanac in bygone era that strongest lightning bolt will never bring back. having said that future president clinton looks newly pressed and quite sexy. maybe she took beauty tips from "back to the future" part ii. >> overall hair, change of blood. added 30 or 40 years to my life. i have seen what it takes. >> girl. should get a refund. how is hillary's retread paranoia playing with the kids? >> the dark! i hate the dark! kennedy: oh, she has got a barn full of it. young biff. hillary is not only one that needs "the time machine."

paul ryan should set the clock for john 20th, 2021. if all the wrangling leads to the presidency. he might want to draw his cheesehead hat into the ring but how will the justice system work in the future. >> justice system works swifter in the future now they abolished all lawyers. kennedy: abolished all lawyers. speaker of the house will be completely nuttiered if the freedom caucus has anything to say. to go back to still had a window for running for president and car pay deemseize the -- carp p.d. diem, to seize the day. don't have to imagine doc brown is looks likes bernie sanders. >> 1.1 gigawatts. kennedy: from megawatts to jig ga watts.

with all the politicians tearing apart at extreme scenes, the future is not all that bad. it is the present that is much worse. oh, god. on the show tonight dana perino on the dos and don'ts for hillary clinton for tomorrow's grilling before the congress anthony merchiore from hot hotel impossible quote. vladmir putin has meeting with syrian dictator. i'm glad you're toots right along with us. i'm kennedy. ♪ kennedy: biden is out, here he is earlier when we thought he could be president. >> it may very well be that process, by the time we get through it, closes the window on mounting a realistic campaign

for president. that might close. i've concluded it has closed. kennedy: yes. but you know what they say? when god close as window, he makes lemonade. let's invite party panel to talk about what is really going on behind the scenes with joe biden. it's dagen mcdowell from fox business network. you heard of it. gavin mcginnis, and also tonight brian morganstern, comedian, republican strategist. since you're political and republicany. i will ask you, why didn't joe run? >> because he couldn't win. that was most defiant non-campaign announcement i have ever seen. seems like he really wanted to but some kind of force prevented him from doing that. kennedy: yeah. >> and of course, hillary is somewhere celebrating and dancing a jig or whatever. i for one am disappointed

because he is such a funny guy. he is such a likeable guy. kennedy: he could have made a crazy race even more interesting. >> yeah. kennedy: and what i want to know from you, dagen, is it all about the timeline? is there something beneath the surface either we're not attuned to? because i was expecting announcement this week. is with juan of the people that just assumed the vice president was going to run. >> people, democratic fund-raisers, people in the party thought he waited too long. gave hillary clinton the opportunity to shine in that debate. kennedy: yeah. >> she did that. kennedy: should he have gotten in before that? >> if he was going to do that, he should have. historically is not greatest fund-raiser. she wrapped up all major donors. they worked really hard when the campaign thought joe biden was going to jump in they call everybody that wasn't committed on phone and rally. i think it is sad because the crazy second cousin who will not be at christmas this year.

he always brought the cool finger traps. always had pocketfuls of them. kennedy: always touching your neck? >> maybe squeeze your thumb until it hurt. >> maybe it is the drunk uncle like the bobby moynihan character. >> not even drunk. just funny. kennedy: yeah. >> crazy stories. kennedy: i mean i was looking forward to a biden presidency. you're a fan of hillary clinton right, gavin? >> i'm scared of her. kennedy: this is big shift on democratic side in your favor. >> i see her i see barack obama as single mom that looks like hillary clinton. when i see hillary clinton i see the godfather. i see a mafioso dude who said to biden, i know that you want to run but not convenient to me and maybe you're going to go away. he looked to obama and obama went like that. [laughter]. kennedy: baby, i'm just a single mom. i can't even help you right now. i don't even like don corleone clinton. and you're done. >> i'm telling you, she is

gaining power. she has dirt on people. not like she is going to whack them. she go away and maybe i make things go away for you. kennedy: did you see the episode of "empire" hands scuzzy files in the judge. judge, we have new information in the case. it is pictures of him in a ball gown. this is convincing you just made bail, mr. lyons. hillary went up to joe. here is dossier we come filed for you. joe opened it up and lord knows what is in the file. >> that is exactly what is going on. hate to see something happen to your legacy. kennedy: is she going to break his legacy? [laughter]. hillary clinton dodge ad possible contender today. is she now inevitable? will she have a spring had her step when congress grills her at tomorrow's benghazi hearing. this could be absolutely crazy. brian, you call her the aggressive victim. explain that and will she use that tomorrow?

>> it is her posture in most conversations and most stories. she responds people are attack me and i will stand up to them. it is aggressive victim posture. it is her move. it is always her move. that is what difference does it make thing. she will find a way do it again tomorrow. kennedy: i don't think what difference does it make, that did not help her politically. that is one of the things that galvanized so much animosity tomorrow. >> you have to do it in her voice. what difference does it make? that's why -- >> this is more mob tactics. she has, it is very difficult situation. tony soprano thing going. where she is going, i'm not the only person on the hook for benghazi. you guys are involved too. susan rice, obama, you guys were all on the same page. so you want to attack me, you're going down too. kennedy: who should go down for it then? who should go down? >> they all should go down. they were all involved. hillary said it was terrorist attack on september 20th. single mom barack obama talking to the on "the view" to his

gals, cat calling whatever the gals do, i don't think it was terrorism or at least -- >> this video is so bad, we should totally make sure people make anti-muslims videos that is awful. >> that is who she is. she is mobster who might take over this country. kennedy: go ahead. >> shy has to be careful not to look so gleeful now she is kind of the democratic nominee without, that is kind after given at this point. she doesn't look did did i during this hearing. that she doesn't do one much throw her head back, [laughter] kennedy: interesting. biden, you're absolutely right about biden, he was making a speech, like well, i'm not running for president but if i were running for president this is exactly what i would do and i'm wondering what his motivation was for making announcement day before benghazi hearings? is there something political afoot? >> sure. he wants to make sure -- kennedy: is he tripping her up or doing her a favor? >> time will tell.

kennedy: what do you think, brian? what do you think? >> i don't -- i think he is serving his own interests he can say i did this in my terms and not on -- kennedy: why not do that friday. why not do it wednesday day before benghazi hearing? >> he is trying to make up his mind. look at the that speech. she said you know that thing that happened during benghazi about the "hee haw"? maybe if you were to, i would king that. kennedy: nice sound effects. >> she squeezes his arm and he says, ow claim. kennedy: you remember at dinner party and your kids misbehaving and trying to get them out room? >> you're reenacting every first date i had between 16 and 30. >> you dropped out of everyone of those race. >> exactly. kennedy: panel is returning. since joe biden is not run something hillary clinton donald trump's only real obstacle?

dana perino with the dos and don'ts for hillary for the don'ts for hillary for the benghazi hearing and will weigh but what if you could see more of what you wanted to know? with fidelity's new active trader pro investing platform,

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♪ . kennedy: hi, there, welcome back. donald trump leads another poll of national republican voters that is out today. not only do people support him,

they also think he is going to win. according to "abc news/washington post poll," 42% said they expect him to win their party's nomination, followed by ben carson at 15% and jeb bush at 12%. marco rubio just has 5% in that poll. today after joe biden announced he would not run for president, donald trump said, would prefer to run against hillary clinton over biden anyways because, quote, her record is so bad. our panelists back, dagen mcdowell, gaffe ven mcginnis and brian morganstern. dagen, i will ask you time to toe in the towel and accept a trump presidency. >> it is 2:00 a.m. in the bar, not 4:00 a.m. but getting close. kennedy: great analysis. >> got a little too much to drink. you have this guy sitting next to you, talks great game. he is showing interest. he is showing interest. he clearly has money. so you're more seriously entertaining what he is offering you than you were three hours

prior. not quite close. kennedy: when you were sober, what did he look like? >> he looked like a bully, with a lot of money. at that that you get 50% in your favor. kennedy: since he is political outsider and you know he really will be a civilian ascending to the presidency if he is elected will he finally tell us what happened at rosswell? >> i think that is how his hair came into being. came from another planet and somehow ended up on his head. i'm not too worried about this because -- kennedy: are you trump -- litarian. >> i'm not a trump -- odyte. polls don't have predictive value until four weeks before the election which is new year's day. kennedy: it is not about predicting. we're assessing trends. we're not assuming some person will win the presidency. shows some people are going down

and some people are moving on up like the jeffer sons. he is george jeffer son in the flesh. >> oh, man, i wonder if he can dance like that? i would love to see that. kennedy: now, gavin, i know you don't like bernie sanders. i know you don't like bernie sanders. >> i'm petrified of him. he is bogeyman. kennedy: his followers scare you because you say they are low information voters. don't you get the sense if you're honest, there are low information voters on republican side who are enamored with donald trump for same reasons? >> sure. low information republican voters leave people alone. low information lefties want to mess with my money and my life. rednecks they tend to vote right, i will be rich one day. now to use dagen's analogy, this is why youi'm so petrified of bernie sanders. it is 2:00 a.m., right? getting later. trump is there and trump goes too far and something like i would have you wrapped around my little finger and just drop you like that. then dagen chicago's, you know what? i'm going home with the nerd,

just to spite you. and i'm sitting there watching, oh. [laughter]. kennedy: is bernie sanders the nerd in the bar? >> he is the nerd in the bar. i always say low information because you say i always say woman. low information voters [bleep] are going to spite to make him president. happen in canada. joey from "friends" was just made president. kennedy: that same thing could happen here. call me a lover of liberty but i don't see the sanders-trump phenomenon being so different from one another. >> really? kennedy: uh-huh. you really think bernie sanders going to be nominee? i hope it is trump sanders because i wouldn't vote for either one. >> i would not rule out bernie sanders becoming president of the united states, us having a lot to talk about in this building, media pundits being happy because that's my job, but

everyone else going no! again. >> in all seriousness -- kennedy: so much horror in the future i'm actually speechless, dagen. >> in all seriousness, one thing trump has going for him are his kids. meeting them in person and talking to him, they are serious and they work hard and they -- kennedy: they work hard and they are get net i can superhumans -- genetic superhumans. alison has this wraparound her arm, i can get you married to one of them. >> thank you. kennedy: i will bring back polygamy if that what is takes. we will match wits with fact or fiction with vladmir putin. first. lou: dana perino on deck with the does and don'ts on benghazi hearing.

♪ kennedy: well hello there, are you ready? it is time, baby. thursday the house select committee on benghazi will begin hearings with hillary clinton on her role as secretary of state in the 2012 attack. it is a high-stakes hearing for hillary as a sour sound bite could be used against her as she is running for president. dana perino knows something how to sound presidential. she joins me with the dos and don'ts of navigating a congressional hearing. dana perino, co-host of "the five" and former white house press secretary and goddess among us. >> i hope you would add something indeed. kennedy: get through some of your dos and don'ts. for hillary she could obviously bury herself. the first do is keep answers short. >> in any court situation one of the best things to do is answer yes or no, to keep it short and not try to elaborate. make sure you're answering the question that they're asking. don't try to go off into someplace else. it will actually help you get out of the seat faster, if you

keep things short. kennedy: not a natural thing for politicians to do. they want to explain themselves. want to get people to like them. >> there is no time limit on this hearing. she will sit there until all the questions are answered. that is the best way to do it, answer quickly. kennedy: you also say she should be thoughtful and smart and show respect for the process. >> right. this is going to be very difficult for her because she has decided politically the best thing for her to ridicule the process but in my opinion there is going to be a hearing. there will be coverage and she might as well shine at it and show some confidence and be a little respectful of the fact there is congressional branch as president, she might need to know that one day. kennedy: she might need to work with these people in, not too short order if she is in fact elected president. i think it has been curious and slightly disrespectful she is going around, you know, using kevin mccarthy's talking point. we realize that is political. you say the third do, show compassion for the families.

that is important area she is totally been lacking. she has seen so much non-support on benghazi issue. >> i absolutely agree. my biggest thing about benghazi from the beginning why they told a lie about the video in the first place. then she personally repeated the lie to the family members. and, not, i don't for a second think that she doesn't have some compassion. she seems has really hard time showing it as if that showed weakness. i think if she showed compassion for the families it would show strength. kennedy: let's get into some of the don'ts. as she lacks compassion she is quite chameleon telling different versions of events. whether changing position on a trade deal or the keystone xl pipeline. you say don't get caught changing your story. is that easy to do in congressional hearing? >> easy to do if you told the truth from the beginning but if you change your story several times you have to figure out which one you will stick with. best thing tell the truth if she can remember what that is.

kennedy: second do, don't lose cool in negative way. question will republicans succeed in unraveling? are they adept enough, trey gowdy is prosecutor. are there other people on panel who will succeed? >> people, especially democrats didn't like what the previous chairman darrell issa how he handled hearing. it is difficult in some ways to tell people exactly how they should behave. if you run a tight ship. this is my hearing. you will be respectful. come with questions, not speeches, i think it will be better hearing. democrats might be worse at this hearing than the republicans. >> they seem a bit emotional at this point. i know it has been difficult proceedings so far because it has become so political. i want to know from you, joe biden's announcement, timing he is not running for president, the day before the benghazi hearings, was that politically timed? >> i think, i think it is too shallow to think that way. it is easy to say, he obviously must have inside information that the fbi is not going to indict her.

therefore joe biden said day before will not run to make sure coverage of hearing is lessened next day. i think this was bigger than that. the timing is a bit coincidental. just logistically if you have to be on the ballot in a lot of states you have to file by november 1st which is less than 10 days away. maybe a little bit of calculated to do it the day before the benghazi hearing but no one should be under any misinformation. the benghazi issue is not going to sink or hillary clinton on its own. this is not the only thing that is important in the election. number one thing is the economy. that is where the real battle is and should be. kennedy: absolutely. we'll see, obviously the benghazi timeline come up tomorrow. a lot about emails and can't wait to hear -- >> she should admit the video was totally bogus. kennedy: totally bogus. amen. dana perino thanks. coming up a fun way to use drones as halloween's decorations and ruin older

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online and on the usaa app. kennedy: ah, hi, you. you are the candle in my jack-o-lantern and corn in my candy and least i can do is treat you to some weird news. this is the "topical storm." topic number one. how many times have you severed the arteries and tendons in your arms and legs trying to carve a pumpkin? man if i had a nickel for every halloween suture i would have at least a buck 05. youtube user has much cleaner and more effective way of carving the gorde. check this out. [gunfire] >> i love it. [gunfire]

kennedy: fantastic. you can fit a cigar right in there. at first when i saw that rifle i thought it was going to look like frame 313 of zapruder film. boy, was i pleasantly surprised. the boys at the range will have the best halloween ever! they love crafting. topic number two. if you were traveling near the paris valley airport in california over the weekend and said, hey, did 61 people just jump out of a plane? by gum you're good at math and you would have been right. skydivers assembled into a diamond shape thousands of feet above the airport setting a new world record. it is very impressive. i have to think it would be even cooler if they all wore elvis costumes or spelled out emoticons on way down. still pretty neat. people from 12 countries jumped from an altitude of 13,500 feet. reminds me the first time i went skydiving. up watch this.

>> jump! kennedy: see, i going to carve pumpkins. topic number three. federal regulators announced monday that recreational drone operators will be required to register their drones. well, maybe because this guy dolled up his flying gizmo in a halloween costume and took it on a stroll through the sky in his arizona neighborhood. [laughing] that is cool thing to do. do you know how many old people live in arizona? a lot. at least six of them saw looming specter of death in their rear view mirrors and sputtered home to say good-bye to their families. almost as cruel as, using a grim reaper costume to remind smokers about their deadly habit. ♪ ♪ image of you and of me

kennedy: topic number four. >> yeah, you know i'm no fan of dr. conrad murray and i curse him for his evil and his propill follow. i'm always glad to hear michael jackson's music live on. you heard alien ant farm cover smooth criminal. they have nothing on these lovely japanese gals including the reknowned floutist who uses traditional instruments to recreate m.j.'s 1987 classic and include these instruments and watch this. ♪ kennedy: eddie, are you okay? eddie are you okay? are you okay eddie? why did these beautiful young

women choose "smooth criminal" as their cover song. they stole those instruments and performing from common room in the nagano women's prison. that is great. topic number five. british airwayses did a survey of 1000 uk travelers and played various american accents and brits turns out find new yorkers to have the sexiest accents. and, those nutty englanders think their new england counterparts sound the most intelligent. we can not disagree. listen to the inherent genius in the voices of these two bostonians. >> it is a baby bleep. holy [bleep]. we are witnessing a baby right here, dude. kennedy: oh, that is stunning. you know, sometimes we have different words, they have different meanings in great britain than they do in america. for example what we call a sweater, they call a jumper.

when we say underwear, they say knickers. and what they call intelligent, we use the term, nauseating. same language. so many meanings. so much fun. if you have any stories you want to see in this "topical storm," use hashtag "topical storm." tweet me @kennedynation. find me on instagram. coming up "hotel impossible"'s anthony melchiorri with hotel horror stories that will make your skin crawl and you might consider camping. first the panel returns to play fact or fiction. vladmir putin, did putin remake a russian version of rocky where ivan drago wins? find out. >> i must break you.

♪ kennedy: that's absolutely right. those lights, that music, that can only mean one thing.

russian president vladmir putin recently summoned syrian dictator bashar al-assad to moscow to discuss joint military campaign in the syrian civil war and potential political settlement. that made us wonder, how much do we really know about russia's shirtless uber masculine leader? time for us to play fact or fiction, the putin edition, just what you have been waiting for. feel free to play along at home. we have a glorious panel today. my goodness they are warmed up and ready to go. dagen, gavin and brian, are you ready to play, vladmir putin fact or fiction? >> yes. kennedy: who do you think will win this one, dagen? >> brian. kennedy: oh, brian? >> i don't like to set expectations like that but, yeah. kennedy: gavin, go ahead. >> i'm going to be taking hope the trophy. kennedy: wow, here we go. two votes for brian one for gavin. question number one, one time vladmir putin shot a whale, with a crossbow, fact or fiction?

wow, look who got that one right? gavin mckinnon. >> you can tell. kennedy: that is absolutely right. putin shot non-fatal skin sample darts at a while for science. didn't say he killed him. just shot him. >> that is how i didn't know it. kennedy: that is not a horse. that's a zodiac. he does have a horse named zodiac, you were right to guess that. here is question number two. vladmir putin stole a super bowl ring from the owner of the patriots. fact or fiction? it is just crazy enough to be true. everyone is at board with one. gavin got that one wrong. >> it s. that proven or allegation? kennedy: patriots owner robert kraft, he put it on, i could kill someone with the ring. white house asked him to say it

as grift in order to destablize u.s.-russian relations. then he deflated tom brady's balls. question number three. according to state media, a russian pharmaceutical company used putin's extraordinary virile blood as test? is that fact or fiction. gentlemen know this is crazy to be true. dagen is right. that is fiction. ready for question number four? how are you guys feeling about this. dagen is in the lead. according to state media vladmir putin ran a double marathon in 2009 with combined 52.4 consecutive miles. he stopped running in order to give his guards a rest. is that fact or fiction? everyone says fact. and everyone is wrong. that did not happen. it could have happened. >> i never said it happened. i said they said that. [laughter]. kennedy: well apparently they didn't say that. >> oh. kennedy: or they didn't say it

loudly enough because gaffe inwant listening on that day. here is question number 5, are you feeling putinnized, brian? >> i'm feeling yes, like i'm on the horse with him but i'm the obama, with my hand around his waist. kennedy: are you both shotless? >> i have sleeveless shirt. he is shirtless. kennedy: dagen go ahead. >> i don't want to be too connected with vladmir putin. i want to be somewhere in the middle. i know a little it bit. >> try to throw the game at this point. here is question number 5. vladmir putin made the actor who portrayed ivan drago in "rocky iv" with a russian look-alike where the russian wins. that is widely available throughout russia. fact or fiction? now everyone is tied. that is false! it would be so so great if it were true. >> widely available was the tip off. nothing is widely available.

kennedy: only thing widely available in russia is alcoholism and depression. here is question number 6. vladmir putin released his own 82-minute martial arts training video, called let's learn judo with vladmir putin. is that fact or fiction? >> i want that to be true. >> i do too. kennedy: dagen you and gavin say it is fact. brian says it is fiction. it is fact. let's roll the tape. >> oh, sweet. >> getting out of here. >> this is the best. kennedy: oh, look at that. he broke that man's neck. now they're making love. >> christmas shopping is done. >> he is so bored of kicking people's ass. >> you know he learned moves from? kennedy: who is that? >> rythmic gymnast paramore. kennedy: that is absolutely right. brian you are trailing you only have two. you can make it up with this question. three-way tie if they get it wrong. according to russian media in 2008. vladmir putin save ad television

crew from a siberian tiger by personally shooting it with a tranquilizer gun. is that fact or fiction? paddles please. fact or fiction? oh, brian, should have gone other way. gavin you and dagen tied for four. that is fact. reports putin staged event to bring awareness from the endangered tigers. the tiger later died from overdose. they named that tiger heath ledger posthumously. i didn't make it up. >> can you pick a less beloved celebrity overdose? kennedy: no. i could not. even more to love now. question number 8. according to tony blair, putin frequently calls world leaders on the phone, pauses dramatically and says, then never mind, then hangs up. fact or fiction? >> i want to believe it. >> i want to believe it. kennedy: now gavin is in the lead because he didn't believe it. that is fiction.

buy and dagen you have that one wrong. dagen you have five. brian you don't have a chance in hell. you are the tom shalou. we know what that means. he was in the middle of trivia know where. question number nine, to promote environmentalism he raised and bottle fed a baby shark before releasing it into the wild. fact or fiction? gavin, your instincts are serving you well. dagen you were right there. brian, you were nowhere close to winning. gavin, you actually are the victor with six glorious correct answers. >> yes. kennedy: dagen in second place. >> everybody knows you don't bottle feed a shark, you breast feed it. kennedy: absolutely right. maybe next year, premier putin will start lactating so he can save all the baby sharks. >> he has impressive pecks.

kennedy: he could sprout more nipples. he could sprout more litters of sharks. that is how they're born in litters. >> he has the best nipples in the whole world. i want that -- meme to be created. kennedy: if you do that by indof the night i will by buy you the next round. >> perfect. kennedy: called loser's consolation sauce. thank you all for playing fact or fiction. we invite you to the winners circle when we have the grand champions round. >> great, can't wait to be there. kennedy: we have anthony melchiorri from "hotel impossible." you will be astonished what most hotels do. how often do they wash the bedspreads? ♪

(ee-e-e-oh-mum-oh-weh) (hush my darling...) (don't fear my darling...) (the lion sleeps tonight.) (hush my darling...) man snoring (don't fear my darling...) (the lion sleeps tonight.) woman snoring take the roar out of snore. yet another innovation only at a sleep number store.

♪ >> i refuse to help an owner that is fleecing his guests. this is fraudulent hotel. this is not a real hotel. you're sitting here taking people's money. so i can't work for you. i met people like your father before where they say something and they don't do it and don't back it up. i'm not interested in wasting my time. kennedy: no. because that father is nasty. that is clip from "hotel impossible" where host anthony melchiorri tries to get struggling hotels all over the world back on their fleet. he has no-nonsense approach and tough love to transport most repulsive and hotels on earth. anthony joins me now. "hotel impossible" airs tuesdays 10:00 p.m. on travel channel. anthony, i love traveling, i love hotels but i know you have some gross stories about bedbugs and mold. what do you do when you walk in and you know a place is infested with either fungus or bugs? >> you run. can you run fast? kennedy: baby.

>> you run fast. first thing is when you have bedbugs, well, you don't know if the hotel has bedbugs right? kennedy: right. >> you walk in and put your luggage in the bathroom. they don't like tile and they don't like light. they light dark places. go around the mattress to see if there is bedbug and headboard. they're in the headboard. i say mattress a lot of times. really talking to a lot of exterminators more in the headboard than even the mattress. kennedy: oh. >> soon as you see bedbug, tell the general manager he will move you. what i do is check out. kennedy: i don't want to be infested and eaten and consumed alive by necrotic creatures. let me ask you this. walk in the hotel what is grossest thing you ever seen? >> throw-up and diarrhea on floor. kennedy: hotel room? in panama city beach, florida in 1986? >> no, where was i in in tennessee. kennedy: lovely state. one of my favorites. >> five-star hotel and one-star

hotel. you could have bedbugs or dirt or vomit. i came from a hotel -- kennedy: are those amenities you have to preorder because that sounds fantastic? how bad are bed spreads. we hear urban myths that they legally only is to wash bedspreads once a year and they're covered with filth? >> i don't know tell you what legality is, some hotels don't clean them once a year or a century. you want to see white bedspreads. easy to clean. if you see a bedspread, regular old bed spread on your bed, just leave or just put a to you he will or he three towels down because they're disgust. people say, well you don't sleep on bedspread. but people do nasty stuff on bed spread. have sex on bed spread. you never know. kennedy: what are top three things you tell hotels to turn their business around? >> one. make sure the owner -- kennedy: white spread spreads? >> get white bedspreads. make sure the owner and

housekeeper know the mission statement. if they know the mission statement. if they understand what the goals are they're usually successful. kennedy: seems pretty straightforward with hotel. we want people to come here to pay to sleep. >> really you're not going there to sleep but you're living there. you're in the bed. you're eating. you have recreation. you have meetings. kennedy: i'm soiling the bedspread. >> you're soiling the bedspread. you're not really coming to sleep. you're coming to live. that is what i try to tell owners. they're coming to live. from second they go into the hotel, when i visit plaza hotel, first thing one of my ladies first weeks at plaza hotel, mister, where is eloise. she wasn't there to sleep. she came there to hang out. third, pay your staff well. housekeepers work hard. some clean 17, 20 rooms a day. if they're making $7 an hour, that will not cut it. take care of your staff. understand people come there to live. they don't come there to sleep. pay attention.

kennedy: don't drink out of the glasses. drink out of plastic cups because they clean the glasses with same rags they clean the toilet with. >> disgusting. i literally had someone in front of me, take a rag around the toilet. i saw them literally put the rag in the glass in front of me. kennedy: wow. that's like halloween punch. [laughing] can't wait to trick-or-treat. this whole conversation makes me want to go camping. take my own stuff somewhere else so i don't have to sleep in bedbug and fluid filled -- >> you seem like camper. kennedy: i will camp with the best of them. i will lay down on dirt and fool around. >> really? i'm in the military. kennedy: i will noodle with paul ryan. wrestle a bear for it. absolutely. >> really? don't mind going bathroom in the woods? kennedy: babe i did that just 15 mints ago. we're in the middle of manhattan. that is challenge. >> don't walk through central park anyone. kennedy: not unless you have rain boots on.

thank you so much for being here. >> my pleasure. kennedy: love the show. >> love you. kennedy: thank you. now we will be man and wife in our holy hotel room. coming up have you ever been cheated on? one woman was, put up a billboard exposing her husband as two-timer.

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everything i buy for my studio. ♪ and that unlimited 2% cash back from spark means thousands of dollars each year going back into my business... that's huge for my bottom line. what's in your wallet? kennedy: oh, there is nothing worse than a nasty breakup but some disgruntled spouses take things to a whole different level. one man hit the streets on his bike to tell story of a woman who got revenge. >> a woman from sheffield, england, is in the news for using a giant roadside billboard to break up with her cheating husband. would you ever consider doing something like that. >> either that or a -- >> i would have taken the money for billboard and gone on vacation. >> gotten your groove back? >> yes.

>> i would put his picture up just to -- >> personal and painful? >> yeah, yeah. >> give me breakup pointers. what is the best way to break up with someone? >> as civil as possible. >> even if they're cheating dogs. >> even if -- >> not text. texting is bad way to break up with someone. >> to impersonal. >> that means he don't have enough [bleep] to break up had person. >> heartless, though. isn't a warm gesture. >> most memorable breakup? >> criers are the worst. when you feel really bad bit. >> could always text. >> no, you can't text. >> are there any significant others from your past who deserve a billboard? >> i could count a few, yes. >> what would the billboard say? >> dirty cheater, good-bye. find somebody else to be your dartboard. have fun. ♪ kennedy: oh, there you go. hopefully you will run into rich on his bike sometime soon visit to manhattan. thanks for watching show.

watch all new episodes of "kennedy" monday this thursday at 8:00 p.m. eastern, 5:00 pacific. on fbn. facebook kennedy fbn. tomorrow night's email back, tomorrow night's email back, kennedy fbn@foxbusiness.com. a t for time life's video collection. (soft piano music) well, hello. i'm carol burnett and i'm here at cbs in los angeles at studio 33. come on in. (tv show announcer) from television city in hollywood... (jaunty theme music) ♪ ...it's the carol burnett show! (carol burnett) this is the stage where it all began. we shot all 11 seasons of my variety show here. you know, we made so many great memories. but no one has seen the first five seasons of the carol burnett show since they were first aired. no reruns, no web streaming,