i don't think i've ever see a news cycle, i don't know if we'll have one quite like this one. which is why we're here live for you every night on fox business. good night from new york city. see you tomorrow. "ken" begins right now. . kennedy: thank you, trish. president trump gearing up for the biggest political showdown in his presidency as democrats vow to go to war over the mueller investigation. the question now, who has the upper hand? the president yesterday fired, well, demanded the resignation of attorney general jeff sessions. he replaced him with matthew whisker acting attorney general, former chief of staff at the d.o.j. democrats crying foul because whitaker called for limits on mueller's power. whitaker oversees the special counsel and according to the "washington post" he does not plan to recuse himself as sessions did, and the dems claim president trump could use whitaker to kilt investigation. here's newly re-elected

democratic senator joe manchin. >> jeff sessions should not have been fired, mueller should have been protected. we've got to get this investigation done to where it has credibility by the most credible person in bob mueller. all this stuff has to come. kennedy: democrat are calling it a constitutional crisis. i don't think we're quite there yet, keep your shirts on, especially you, schumer. today on "fox & friends," white house counsellor kellyanne conway tried to put the kibosh on all that talk. >> without having the word crisis in it, it's not a constitutional crisis. it is the president and the team have been very compliant with the mueller investigation. over one million pieces of paper have been produced, over 30, 33 years ago, individuals produced documents or testified or met or both. kennedy: the president has one ace in the hole, the clock. democrats are clamoring for investigations but not in power

for two months, january 3rd to be exact. the president has quite a bit of leeway to use his executive power as he sees fit but doesn't hold the cards. the mueller team is writing final report on the russia investigation, perhaps looking to head trump off at the pass. just like a good-old western. the next few days and months are about to get more interesting, if that's possible. right now former cia analyst and radio show host buck sexton to make sense of everything in the world. buck, welcome back. >> good to see you. >> let's talk first about the fear and hysteria over sessions' firing. it's not a surprise, the president has been telegraphing for many, many months he was going to do just, this he said it would probably happen after the midterms, the day after the mid terms. what do you make of the reaction to sessions' resignation? >> the president told me in the oval office a couple of months

ago i don't have an attorney general. so there is zero surprise here that after the midterms, the president decided to switch things up, and i think that everyone needs to take a step back and look at what's really going on here. a constitutional crisis is not whatever a bunch of libs don't like. there's actually no problem with the authority the president has used here to replace his attorney general, who serves at his pleasure. fact that you had an attorney general who recused himself from anything to do with russia collusion, the mueller probe, the special counsel and that person has been replaced is not actually unethical in any way, shape, or form. the president can get rid of the attorney general, did get rid of the attorney general, and it's interesting that people are claiming that whitaker should recuse himself. kennedy: what is the basis for that? is it because he has written in op-ed pieces how he foresees the mueller investigation coming to an end, and what he

considers to be various red lines in the mueller investigation and he's had strong opinions, are opinions a good basis for that kind of recusal of? >> so much laughable hypocrisy particularly from the swamp on this one, from media and the democrats. you remember a couple of months back when you had some fbi agents who had text messages saying horrific things about the president, and we were told hold on a second, people are allowed to have their opinions. those happened to be senior fbi agents overseeing an investigation that went directly to the president of the united states. so now we're being told this guy whitaker is not allowed to have stated anything about the mueller probe or else he's supposed to recuse himself? he said there should be parameters, is there a debate about that? this should not be an open-ended fishing expedition. there is so much criticism of

him for that reason saying limitations on the special counsel, just goes to show you people want it to be a fishing expedition, the people opposed to this. kennedy: yes, that's what they want. they want government power to be used against those in power they disagree with. but i want to ask about rod rosenstein because even though he's kind of an unpopular figure in many circles and has several noted conflicts of interest, that's not conspiracy theory, there are not dots that need to be connected, that's plain fact and people are upset that rosenstein was not appointed interim attorney general. what do you make of that? >> rosenstein has a much more clear conflict of interest as well as a direct involvement in some of the issues that are under investigation in the special counsel. rosenstein, the firing of james comey, you can't separate these things. rosenstein is actually somebody who should have recused himself

many, many months ago based on any kind of standard of conflict of interest, and i think that what you see is people are just applying the standard for what they want, and then all of a sudden the standard goes away when they don't. rosenstein would not be a good pick for this. are we to think whitaker is unethical because he thinks there should be limitations to the special counsel? kennedy: i don't know, a little later on in the show, we'll talk who might succeed jeff sessions. doesn't seem this is the guy who's going to be confirmed as the official attorney general. he's the chief of staff, and i'm still curious, do you know who appointed him chief of staff? was it sessions or was it the president? >> i believe -- although don't quote me on this -- i believe jeff sessions brought him in. kennedy: that makes sense, when you're the attorney general, seems you appoint your own chief of staff. >> not something that requires any kind of congressional

authorization. kennedy: that's the issue that judge napolitano raised with whitaker's interim appointment is that he does not have that sort of congressional stamp necessary to lord over the bastion of justice. >> this is the process, the process is you appoint interim attorney general, have you somebody who becomes the interim attorney general and somebody else has to go through advice and consent of the senate. so everything here is well within constitutional bounds. everything the president is doing is within his authority. there's no lack of ethics at work here, it's just people like the idea of rosenstein because look, let's be honest, liberals believe that rosenstein is somewhat anti-trump and so they want somebody -- kennedy: therefore he must be good. >> must be good. but other people that don't come out as overtly anti-trump like whitaker can't be considered ethical, and it shows you when it looks bad for

people that liberals like within the d.o.j. or the fbi, everyone is allowed to have political opinions, let's not take this too far. kennedy: no reciprocity, no golden rule, it's pretty insane, and i continue to demand that because i like to party. buck sexton, thank you very much. >> i like to party too, that's why we get along. kennedy: 9:00 eastern, love it. crazy developments in the midterm elections that just won't end! is it still tuesday? doesn't feel super. arizona democrat kyrsten sinema pulled ahead of martha mcsally in hotly contested senate race. 99% of precincts reporting, mcsally led by 17,000 votes going into today but the latest update puts sinema ahead over 2100. holy underwear, this is far from over because the arizona secretary of state's office says there are still 490,000 votes left to be counted!

that's a lot of dangling chads in the desert. of course, no story speaking of which about election madness would be complete without the state of florida. the governor's race between desantis and gillum tightened. now less than half a percentage point which is the threshold for a recount there. governor rick scott in the same boat against incumbent bill nelson. the midterm elections are supposed to shape the 2020 race, is it possible they won't be over by then? joining me kristin soltis anderson, welcome back. >> thanks for having me. kennedy: we thought one of the florida races had been put to bed, you had tallahassee mayor andrew gillum concede to congressman ron desantis. what is going on there? >> florida, we have a lot of good exports, orange juice, tim tebow, strange headlines and election recounts. two out of four happening here.

crazy headlines. this is what happens when you have a state that is very closely divided, and you have a county like broward county that is notorious for counting ballots over an extended period of time is how i'll put it. on election night, analysts like me when looking at data come in, broward county is the county you go everything else is in, now let's see what broward is. that's the focus what's happening in florida. >> do they have electronic voting in some of the counties there? >> i believe -- every count sdee things differently. i believe that problem in broward county right now is the paper ballots in some places had the race for senate below a fold on the ballot. now there are other races down there too, wasn't just the senate race, but the ballot was oddly designed. you would think after the 2000 recount election debacle, we would figure out to make

ballots people understand. >> the only phrase that coming to mind is come on, man. >> i looking at this ballot thinks it makes a lot of sense, there is analysis of the votes and shows a significant number of undervotes in the senate race suggesting a lot of people were confused and skipped it. but if people skipped it that's not grounds that rick scott's opponent bill nelson can use to say something went wrong. kennedy: where i vote, it says if you don't want to vote for every measure or candidate, leave it blank. that's okay. that is not voter fraud. incompetence is not voter suppression. >> incompetence is not corruption, and i think that's important to keep in mind. right now both parties are feeling very -- emotions are running high as you might expect. kennedy: even al gore, al gore has been driven to drink. >> a lot of allegations of corruption right now. i think it's important for everybody to take a break.

you can be incompetent but doesn't mean you are corrupt. kennedy: maybe people didn't vote for him but they didn't want him to be mad, so they just left it blank. >> well, yeah, all kinds of reasons people do strange thing on the ballots. >> how is this going play out in florida and arizona with one of the few races that is actually, where the lead has shifted? >> well, in arizona, the sheer volume of ballots left to be counted means i have no idea what's going to happen. it was 20,000 in a county that broke heavy a particular way. might be easier to make the projection. so much outstanding in arizona. kennedy: i have to give them credit, arizona quickly becoming the new florida. well done. >> if they want to compete for the title, florida is willing to put up the fight. kennedy: you have the cactus league versus the grapefruit league, from baseball to

ballots, never dull. thank you so much. >> thanks for having me. kennedy: thousand oaks, california, mourning the victims after a crazed shooter killed 12 people in a country music bar last night. i will talk to the mayor of thousand oaks about how his thousand oaks about how his community is hi, kids! i'm carl and i'm a broker. do you offer $4.95 online equity trades? great question. see, for a full service brokerage like ours, that's tough to do. schwab does it. next question. do you offer a satisfaction guarantee? a what now? a satisfaction guarantee. like schwab does. man: (scoffing) what are you teaching these kids? ask your broker if they offer award-winning full service and low costs, backed by a satisfaction guarantee. if you don't like their answer, ask again at schwab.

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. kennedy: tragedy strikes southern california, as you know. there were 12 people killed when a gunman opened fire at a bar last night. the shooting spree happened shortly before midnight at college night at the borderline bar & grill north of los angeles. he shot a smoke grenade and stormed in firing at people in the bar. >> i turned around and saw him shoot a couple more times, and within a split-second, everyone yelled get down. >> we thought it was a joke, we didn't take it seriously at first. we thought it was firecrackers. >> the gunman was throwing smoke grenades all over the place. >> i ran to where the back door is and everyone dog piled on top of each other and it was silent for a couple seconds and all of a sudden a couple guys

that were closer to the bar, they got us and started running towards the back door, get up, he's coming. kennedy: one of the 12 victims, sergeant ron helus is described as a hero tonight. he ran into the bar and died trying to save everybody inside. the suspect, 28-year-old ian david long killed himself in the bar. as if the tragedy wasn't bad enough some of the people inside reportedly survived last year's mass shooting in las vegas that killed 58 people. joining me now by phone, thousand oaks mayor andy fox. i'm so sorry for all that you and the people in your great city have been through, mr. mayor. >> well, we appreciate everybody's thoughts and prayers, it's a difficult time for our community and especially for the families that lost their loved ones. kennedy: yeah, it's really difficult to comprehend something like this because as you know, you've been in city government for years there in thousand oaks. it's a safe place.

it's a tight community, it's incredibly beautiful, and i don't know how you begin to process something like this. you were on your way back from your retirement party. you're also retiring from the l.a. fire department. >> i was, and we were there with many of my colleagues here in thousand oaks. i was on the freeway a little bit before midnight, i got a call there was an active shooter incident in thousand oaks, and having worked 38 years in the l.a. fire department, active shooter is not an uncommon occurrence, it certainly is a unique occurrence at thousand oaks. i went to the command post and realized we had an actual serious incident, which was going to turn into a national tragedy, if you will, that night. kennedy: and you had a member of law enforcement, ron helus, who unfortunately died from injuries he sustained from the

murderer, and, you know, he's been called a hero because he prevented a larger loss of life. this sadly is a known quantity for so many police departments, and every time there's a mass shooting, more and more is learned. unfortunately he sustained injuries he was not able to survive. what do you tell his wife and family? >> well, no words can describe the loss of a loved one. as i mentioned to many of the news outlets this morning, firefighters and police officers in particular, when they go to work in the morning, and all of us have basically the same routine, we kiss our loved ones good-bye, and in the back of your head you know you may not come home at the end of the shift or the next morning, and ron was exactly the same way 29-year veteran. i know from the unified training that we do in law enforcement that they've changed their tactics over the years because of these active

shooter scenarios and the police officers know full well that even though they get there by themselves, they're to do their best to engage the asillant and many times walking in fire without cover and know they may not survive it. that's exactly what he did last night. he went in basically by himself. helped neutralize the situation and gave his life in order for others to live. kennedy: it is so tragic, and a longtime member of our fox family, adam housley, unfortunately lost his niece in that incident, and our hearts go out to all of the families. impossible to make sense at this point. i know you are keeping your community together, and thank you so much for taking the time here. >> my pleasure, and again, we appreciate everybody's thoughts and prayers and we're going to need them over the next coming days and weeks. >> you got it. thanks again. joining me former washington, d.c. police detective and fox news contributor ted williams is back, welcome back, ted. >> yeah, kennedy.

i'm sad to be back under these circumstances, and i got to tell you, my heart is very heavy. you know i've been here at fox for over 20 years, and worked with adam housley, and now to find out that adam housley's niese is one of the victims in this gives me a tremendously heavy heart. kennedy: they're a great family and a very close family, and, again, there are no words, and it's even more tragic when it hits someone that you know and, of course now we look at some of the signs that the shooter might have displayed, and how do you determine whether or not ptsd played a role in this? >> well, it's going to be rather difficult to some degree, but what law enforcement is going to have to do is go back and talk to his family members, members of his community, people who knew him, look at his health care record.

we know that in april, law enforcement were called, health care providers, should i say, and did not take him in at that time. they've got quite a bit of work to do in that area. kennedy: yes, from all the reporting we've seen, he did purchase the gun legally. california has some of the strictest gun laws in the country. i don't think we can really start with that argument, because even if he had somehow illegally warped his weapon, after he purchased it to extend the magazine capacity, someone who's going to commit mass murder like that isn't necessarily going to listen to magazine requirements. >> kennedy, let me say you're absolutely right, unfortunately. and that is if you've got someone in our society

suffering, perhaps from post-traumatic stress disorder and they have a weapon or they have access to a weapon, these tragedies could occur under any and all circumstances. kennedy: yeah, that's what's unfortunate. if someone is -- i don't know, man. it's really tough because the thing that worries me is people who need help look at situations like this and they fear if they go and get treatment for it, they are going to be institutionalized against their will for 72 hours and they are going to have their lives turned upside down, and it kind of exacerbates the problem. i don't know how we begin to outlaw that kind of evil in someone's heart where they can commit something like this against people that they don't know and destroy their families forever. >> you're absolutely right. we're damned in we do, and damned if we don't.

if someone goes in for treatment and say they're having some kind of mental or defect that the time, then they're going to be branded. and no one in our society, unfortunately, wants to be branded, but we've got to try to do something because we've got a dangerous concoction between those who have mental health problems and guns. kennedy: we definitely have a disconnect. ted, thank you so much. >> pleasure. kennedy: ted williams. coming up, ohio democratic congressman tim ryan joins me to talk about the looming speakership. going to be very interesting.

. kennedy: it's like halloween all over again, but with way less candy. our lights are flickering, it's live tv. talk amongst yourself. no don't. if nancy pelosi is the speaker apparent, she's already doing a

piss poor job of wrangling her fractured caucus, not only are there two dozen naysayers from radically different camps, they are on record bashing her lowness and you have excited loud mouths promising everything from subpoenas to impeachment. directly contradicting her majesty's moderation edict, fancy nancy leading her party since 2003 and one could argue not very well as a legislative shepard she has used her staff as prod and speculum to force through such turkeys as obamacare, dodd-frank and the stimuli and lord only knows what monstrosity she could knit together with another wack as tweeker of the house. pelosi is an elitist statist and virtue is ability to raise money by selling favors to out-of-touch rich people in native san francisco.

no wonder the diet communists hate her. only man she knows fixes her limo, establishment hax like pelosi and frenemy nemesis steny hoyer have no business rejoining populists and socialists, and those are the two groups tearing the party at the seams. representatives like tim ryan who boldly challenge the lioness are squawking in dissent but need to actively unashamedly unseat the ghastly establishmentairn from her fluffy throne before she smothers the party to death with her dirty throw pillows. the constitution is clear and the house speaker need not be an elected representative and only states, quote, the house of representatives shall choose their speaker and their officers. so go ahead and shoo horn hole lay blame hillary in there,

it's the closest she'll get to the top job and she's the one person who's more fun to douse in haterade than no good nancy. that's the memo. whoa, nancy is currently the only democrat publicly thrown her hat in the ring to be the next speaker of the house, but with all the discontent on the left, should someone try to mount a coup. we have the man who put up the big fight against her in 2016, ohio democratic congressman tim ryan. welcome to the show, sir. [laughter] >> good to be with you, thank you. kennedy: that was an awkward giggle. you are obviously the guy for the job. a lot of people in your party, in your caucus don't like nancy pelosi. so when are you going to run for speaker? >> well, you know, it's not that we don't necessarily like nancy pelosi, it's that we

think that got the good number of people into the congress and the last couple of days in the election on tuesday were people who said they were not going vote for nancy pelosi if they got in, and so i think we need to slow things down a little bit before we, you know, have any kind of election, and ask these members who ran in red districts who said they weren't going to vote for her that we should ask them what they want the makeup of our leadership team to look like before they move forward, clearly they know how to get elected in the tough districts. kennedy: or pick a lane and be a little bit more forceful and tell your caucus why you're the man for the job. not everyone has to ask permission to do the right thing, and i think you are in a position if you want to lead your party forward, and you want to make a positive difference, and i know that you do. i've talked to you about your practice of mindfulness as well as the love you have for the part of the country where you

come from. so why not be the guy right now? because you're in a very different position in 2018 than you were in 2016. you've got a higher profile and a lot more discontent. as you said, the party and the people coming into the congress are very different. so why not seize the moment? >> well, let me say they think i showed some level of courage two years ago, and i'm deeply, deeply committed to making sure that we have the kind of leadership team we need in order to move forward, i'm still as committed as i've always been, it's important as the new members come in, they're now in the family, and we need to talk to them, understand them, see where they are, and they need to be a part of this process, so where last time we had huge losses, we had people coming in, it was easier to kind of go out and do something, but now i think it's important that we have a little more of a team atmosphere.

kennedy: okay, do you agree with nancy pelosi that you can't waste your time, energy and resources on fruitless investigations and subpoenas? don't you agree that you need to come up with a clear and concise economic message to further the economic growth in this country? >> i think 80% of our message has got to be around economic issues. they've got to be around wages. i don't think we should necessarily talk about $15 an hour, i want the democrats to talk about 30, 40, $50 an hour jobs building and rebuilding. kennedy: not by the government but by the small businesses exploding and paying people more because there is a labor shortage. >> well, and to get investment, private investment, venture capital in the places like youngstown, ohio, around newer technologies that have

high-growth potential like additive manufacturing or wind or solar growing by 25 or 30% a year, and that doubles that sector of the economy in four years. how do we get those investments into the old steel country, in the old rubber country and the old coal country. kennedy: kanye and the president, unfortunately we have to wrap up and move on, i encourage you to go forward boldly, act like you have the job and tell some of the people running in disparate directions to move on. i think nancy pelosi lost control, why don't you go in there and gain it? >> well, you know, there's going to be an opportunity for that discussion, and like i said, we got to get the new family members in the family and talk about what we want the future of the democratic party to be, and that's taking care of people who take a shower after work, make sure there is health care in rural communities and hospitals in rural communities and like i

said, private investment, private investment to spur private sector jobs. that's what we're moving on. kennedy: i appreciate that. thank you so much, congressman ryan. >> thank you. thanks. absolutely. now the democrats are in control, they are vowing to do so much investigating we're going to get sick of investigating, if that's possible. some in the party aren't quite sold in the party including pennsylvania senator ed rendell who wrote an op-ed saying -- president trump has vowed to adopt ward-like posture if democrats launch those investigations, but will they be too busy fighting each other to take them on. the panel is here to discuss. from the greg gutfeld show where she serves as correspondent, kat timpf is here along with media reporter

for the hill, joe concha and daily caller editor in chief, go buy your christmas and hanukkah copies for friends, chris bedford is back. >> hey! >> let's talk about this, tim ryan is basically saying we have to focus on the economy. he seems like an attractive candidate particularly for those newly elected democratic congress people from the middle of the country. >> far too suburb minded and sensical for the television age and the great fun we're having with president trump who now is promising a rock 'em sock 'em robot match with a paraplegic. kennedy: he wants her to be speaker so badly. >> in the words of our college students an f'ing white male. that is unacceptable. you can't have that for the future of the democratic party. what does nancy pelosi stand for? kennedy: fantastic.

absolutely right. it is fantastic. what do you make of the direction, nancy pelosi stood up tuesday night, let's hear it for preexisting conditions, and she planted her flag, and people are terrified to run against her. so now you have people like elijah cummings and jerry nadler saying, we're going to investigate russia and jared. >> and try to impeach brett kavanaugh. kennedy: impeach everybody. >> round two, yeah. i think the democrats often they govern with their hearts instead of their minds and allow emotions to get to them, particularly president trump they get triggered easily, and i can see them overplaying their hand with all of these investigations just like the republicans did in the late 90s with ken starr and monica lewinsky because president clinton left with 68% approval rating because republicans overplayed their hands. if they go down that path, it's only going to backfire. kennedy: easy to do and both

side do it. the president does it on immigration and democrats are going to do it with investigation. as a libertarian, what would you like to see here? >> what we're going to see is a lot of gridlock. though the democrats control the house, they're going to try to do the things while they were running. they're going to enact gun control, health care have government involvement and investigate president trump harder. the only place i think they might be successful is trying to investigate president trump harder. i think that in terms of actual legislation we're going to see a lot of bills that go nowhere. kennedy: they're not going to go anywhere in the senate and even on the off chance they do -- >> which is fine with me as a libertarian, i like gridlock sometimes. the left, they're able to do over there -- >> the problem is they don't see eye-to-eye and do that with maybe not big entitlement programs but spending programs.

>> like infrastructure. kennedy: it's the "i" word. >> but counts like obamacare with republicans when they kept repealing and replacing when they knew it would be vetoed, it would be symbolic. kennedy: and had a chance to repeal and replace and they blew it! we're going to have a lot more with the panel coming up, throwing a sendoff for jefferson bow regard sessions. good-bye, jeff. that is next. i can't believe it. that grandpa's nose is performing "flight of the bumblebee?" ♪ no, you goof. i can't believe how easy it was to save hundreds of dollars on my car insurance with geico. nice. i know, right? ♪ [nose plays a jazzy saxophone tune] believe it. geico could save you 15% or more on car insurance.

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. kennedy: let's -- i don't know what that means, but i like it. good riddance, jeff sessions, the president fired and asked for resignation of first attorney general and one of his earliest supporters yesterday. he should have done it a long

time ago, never should have put him in there, here's why beauregard wanted federal prosecutors to go after states that legalized cannabis and did plenty of other things that would make your civil libertarian hairs curl. rejoice the ousting of sessions or the victim of a very tragic shakespearean play. the panel is back, kat, joe and chris. >> i feel i lost my libertarian hairs, i thought it was shaving. that's what bothered me about jeff sessions, wasn't strong on the border. kennedy: not enough sick time. >> and one day and he's gone and snoop dogg is smoking a blunt in front of the white house, jeff sessions would have been out there if he were a.g. >> i feel bad he was a really early supporter of trump. they basically agreed --

kennedy: he and paul manafort. >> he needed the dime, jeff sessions didn't need that. kennedy: that was a really dumb thing to do. >> he was only in his 80s, another 20 years. kennedy: my suggestion that roy moore should have dropped out of the race and jeff sessions should have quit and moved back to alabama as a write-in. >> roy moore would have listened to that, that would be great. >> he can do that in 2020, jones is up already. kennedy: it's true, he was only finishing the term, and jeff can be like, it's like dallas and everyone is still alive including bobby. all right, kat? >> well, i'm just concerned now that he's gone, who's going to prevent all of us from dying of weed? kennedy: weed is as bad as every other drug in the world. >> terrible, people are dying all over the place. we should be concerned. in all seriousness, he's a civil liberties nightmare. he wanted to not just continue the drug war, ramp it up,

increase efforts to incarcerate people. kennedy: creating more refugees and asylees from honduras and el salvador. >> also, he wanted to also limit and reduce legal immigration, not just illegal immigration but legal immigration. kennedy: sure. >> so i just say girl, bye, don't let the door hit you on the way out. kennedy: don't let the door hit you where the lord split you. chris christie will be the next attorney general -- >> no, no. kennedy: great to see you guys. "topical storm" is next. i'm ken jacobus and i switched to the spark cash card from capital one. i earn unlimited 2% cash back on everything i buy. and last year, i earned $36,000 in cash back.

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show me movies a g[ barking ] nu uh, i'm picking the movie tonight. [ whimpers ] be sad, i enjoy it. show me grinchy movies. oh, goody. [ whimpers ] mmm, fine! show me movies max would like. see the grinch in theaters by saying... "get grinch tickets" into your xfinity x1 voice remote. [ laughs ] uh oh. [ laughs ] something in my throat.

. kennedy: we've got exciting news in the real estate world, rolling stone's guitarist keith richards sold his new york city apartment for $9 million. if you think that price was high, you should see the seller. puff-puff pass, this is "topical storm." topic number one -- let's begin tonight in japan where you can't put down your energy drink because you never know who might take it. look at this. according to its owner, this chinchilla that we're going to

show you, there it is, has been jumping back and forth for two days straight. but he's going to make a comfortable bedspread. they're unsure what got into his system and can't get a straight answer from the guy that sold it to him, charlie sheen won't answer his phone, i would say this thing snorted about 2 1/2 grams. the interpret has fallen in love with the chinchilla. who could blame them? it's going to make a nice fur coat if not bedspread. i'm kidding! don't come at me, peta. i love animals! i have a bunch of them running my control room as we speak. that's just the hamster. hello, mr. topic number two -- a dutch man is suing to lower his age by more than 20 years so he can meet more women on tinder. yeah. it's making big headlines

because it is believed to be the first known case of someone using their real age on a dating app, but seriously, man, lie like everyone else. i'm only 22 on my farmer's only profile. great calluses in all the right places. the 69-year-old claims he's biologically 45 and wants birth certificate changed to reflect it. he told the court when he uses his current age, he gets replies from women who are 75 and 80, the problem with dating women that age, when they ghost you on tinder, they really ghost you. the judge is expected to issue a ruling in four weeks. if i had to guess he's going to swipe left on this one. at which point he'll check the app for other judges in the area. topic number three -- newly elected congresswoman alexandria ocasio-cortez says she won't have enough money to get an apartment in washington until after her government salary kicks in.

if that weren't bad enough, she won't have enough to pay for her policies until hell freezes over. ocasio-cortez told supporters she's squirrelling away money to make it to january, and she's not the first freshman lawmaker to go through this. back when elizabeth warren was elected, she couldn't afford a teepee, that is one/1024th true, the bad news is ocasio-cortez doesn't have the dough. she met a 29-year-old man on tinder who invited her to move in. he's dutch. he'll probably smoke enough weed to think her policies make sense. hey, girl! topic number four -- there we are, like a tattoo of your lover's name, this say terrible idea but we do it every thursday, it's time for viewer mail. kicks things off with kennedy tries too hard for edgy, she has to calm it down, she sounds

like cat hate or speed too often. never on speed. totally different. brent writes, love you, you nut. i love you nut too, brent. a good one. wrap it up with libertarian is a fancy way of spelling brainwashed liberal fascist hypocrites. hypocrites. i'll be right back. how can we say when you book direct at choicehotels.com

you always get the lowest price on our rooms, guaranteed? let's say it in a really low voice. carl? lowest price, guaranteed. just stick with badda book. badda boom. book now at choicehotels.com

. kennedy: thank you for consuming the best hour of your day. please follow me on twitter and instagram -- i'll see you later. i miss you all right. the following is a paid advertisement for time life's music collection. ♪ chances are 'cause i wear a silly grin ♪ there are artists we'll always remember... ♪ mona lisa, mona lisa ♪ men have named you there are beautiful songs, words and memories that will always touch our hearts... ♪ it's impossible ♪ to tell the sun to leave the sky ♪ ♪ it's just impossible this is the music of your life.