tonight's show. many of you have strong ideas about the show. some loved it, some hated it and some are in between. make sure you go to greta wire.com. we'll see you tomorrow night on the record. . that's fbn tonight. >> eric: hello, i'm eric bolling, with kimberly guilfoyle, bob beckel, dana perino, greg gutfeld. it's 5:00 in new york city. this is "the five." ♪ ♪ >> eric: we love our icons, heroes, buy stuff they endorse to be like them and we even try to look like them. kardashians, ryan seacrest, the donald, bromwich, kobe, all american brands and all rich because we made them rich. take this week big news makers and money makers. zuckerberg, dimon and downey junior. >> for the first time ever in a single day, we have half a

billion people use facebook. half a billion people. [ applause ] >> we have the widest and deepest capital in the world. >> no offense, i don't play well the others. >> who are you? >> billionaire playboy philanthropist. >> start us off with zuckerberg. $16 million. more power to you. 900 million people on facebook. >> greg: he makes something that everybody uses. he makes toilet paper for the ego. imagine if you own the right to toilet paper, you'd be worth trillion dollars. it makes sense, so many people use it.

look at accruing wealth the way you look at professional sports. we put great athletes on a pedestal. but we don't with people in business. he's professional athlete in business. he performed great feat. we should put them up on pedestal, not denigrate them for achieving. >> eric: some say $16 billion may be a pedestal. >> kimberly: this is what free market, capitalism is about. you can come to this country. if you're not weighed down with regulations you can do something an make money and create jobs. stimulate the economy versus people expecting hand-out. i have something against these people. i don't love facebook. it drives me nuts. but glad for the innovation, creativity. nothing against all three of them. >> eric: she makes a great point. innovation, creation, versus taxation.

regulation. >> bob: i think you have to give him credit. i'd get someone else to be a spokesman but it's a genius idea and it works. i still don't understand the toilet paper. >> dana: scott or charmin. >> greg: yeah, my space is sandpaper. >> eric: let's talk about the other guys to make billion on facebook ipo. going to declare himself no longer citizen of the u.s. and move overseas. >> dana: he wasn't subtle about that. but he'll save $67 million. that is human nature. he earned it. if he wants to live in singapore, they don't allow gum chewing, or have spit on the street. sounds like a great place to

be. >> bob: we are talking about a dude going to singapore. he is a traitor. >> greg: what? >> bob: a traitor. anybody who gives up their citizenship, dodge taxes in this country is a traitor. been a them from every business in the united states. >> greg: are the beatles traitors? rolling stones traitors? >> bob: what does vit to do with anything? >> greg: they left their country to avoid taxes. >> bob: i'm talking about united states of america. >> greg: so you're a patrio patriot. >> bob: if they give up the citizenship is a schmuck. i forget what his name is. >> eric: move to next one. jamie dimon got paid $2 million. he will get hit $23 million. he employs $260,000 people. has trillion dollars in asset under management.

all power to you. >> eric: i understand he is a nice -- >> bob: i understand he is a nice guy according to you, which is not the only confirmation i would need. but he has been in washington spending millions of dollars. this guy is the same guy, the rules blocked and would have stopped the $2 billion in taxpayer funded supported bank. he should be out of a job. >> eric: there is no taxpayer money in j.p. morgan at all. >> bob: that's not true. >> eric: that is jp morgan chase. >> kimberly: wrong base. >> eric: it doesn't matter if dodd-frank was fully implemented if they did, the chinese wall between the investment bank and the regulatory bank, they could still lose $2 billion. >> bob: why is he sticking his nose -- >> eric: regulation costs

money. >> dana: i don't know if it's they're trying to stop the regulation. he was in the lead. his peer allow him to be because he is popular, speaks well an representing them well. trying to help regulators not make the capital market situation worse. i'm not a huge fan of what they did last week and how they handleed it, but i think he is not -- i don't think they're spending money to stop rules. they are trying to participate to make it better. >> greg: the fact is liberal don't hate wealth. they hate anyone more special than they are. it's okay if you are liberal and make money in hollywood, that's okay. you know who is really, really a bad investment? drew berrymore. actress. for every dollar she is paid her films return average of 40 cents. people should be up in arms about that. >> bob: this guy threw a woman -- objective on wall street under the bus to get someone to lay blame.

now he is walking around with $23 million. >> eric: $23 million. he didn't throw anyone under the bus. it happened under her watch. >> dana: he is the one that said the buck stops with me. >> greg: can we throw the braves under the bus. under the bus. >> dana: wait until one more thing for that. [ overtalk ] >> eric: you spend time on the network. jamie dimn, a stand-up guy. well respected in the industry. >> kimberly: he is an industry leader. a guy, if you research any of this throughout the business community, this man is revered. he is respected. looked favorably upon. the reason that the bank is doing so well, one of the reasons is because of his stewardship. he knows what he is doing and tried to get in front of the story. perhaps the message could have been better but nevertheless if you look at the book of jp morgan chase they are doing well. this is a small, min stule percent in terms of --

>> greg: $2 billion out of $186 billion. if it doesn't work, the free market, the great thing about it if you are not worth it, sooner or later you're done. >> dana: how is it different from mf global, jon corzine, the big democratic supporter? used to be the governor of new jersey. now they're under investigation for using -- actually, using customer money to make that. allegedly -- >> eric: allegedly broke the ball. everything i know about the company and jon corzine, mf global has define, they broke the law. >> greg: allegedly means definitely, right? >> eric: on t, yes. one more. quickly, robert downey junior is expected to get big payday for avengers. does he deserve $50 million? >> kimberly: this guy has been through tough times. bob, you should appreciate this. >> bob: i do. >> kimberly: he was down and out on his luck, getting arrested. no financial means available. multiple stints in rehab. happily married now. has a child, he just had

another baby. doing fantastic. he has been box office gold. i love the success story. he is hardworking. i'm happy for him. >> dana: he was on the movie i saw on the airplane that i like. >> greg: one of his best movies. >> kimberly: very talented. >> bob: so many people in hollywood had addiction problems, it's all fluff. it's like what her name, that woman? what is her name? >> kimberly: lindsay lohan. >> bob: all right. this guy has been, as kimberly said, has been through hell and more. come back. he is a great, great, great steady for people who are alcoholics and addicts. look at his success. his movie, hit $50 million. best box office weekend of any movie. >> eric: if that is your litmus test, then jamie dimon -- >> greg: we are lauding him for overcoming addiction. how hard is it to overcome addiction when you're in hollywood and worth billions? you can go to the best rehab,

not negligencely -- >> kimberly: but now. >> bob: it's very hard. >> eric: he has one more addiction you also have. you both have. >> bob: what is that? >> eric: liberalism. thank you. why do we hold people like steve jobs and mark zuckerberg and the guy from google, eric schmidt, why do we hold them on the pedestal yet bankers are evil and bad guys? >> greg: ideological. it is. if you are, it's republican bad, and you know, the cool buys good. that is where it comes from. there is politics of envy. it's not that you want what they have. you just don't want hem to vit. >> bob: bankerrers responsible for the recession. >> eric: a lot of evidence that points to chris dodd, barney frank -- >> bob: get out of here. it happened after that. >> eric: they want to get out of here but the new

hipster. hipster is cool, right? >> kimberly: right. >> eric: hipsters can make money. >> dana: what a hipster? >> greg: just for saying that, you are a hipster. you are a rebellion beans rebillion. the ultimate hipster. >> bob: what is a hipster? >> greg: cool guy. >> dana: i thought it was underwear. >> greg: this will live forever. >> kimberly: i think they banned hipsters at victoria secret. >> dana: i think it should be cool. >> kimberly: ve an administration to be honest that doesn't think it's that cool unless they attend fancy fundraisers in hollywood. it's okay to get money from them. but if you get it from the banks -- >> bob: am i a hipster or not? [ overtalk ] >> eric: hipster, millenial, born between '75-'95 that grew up in the dot com era recognizes success.

coming up, the white house literally rewrites history inserting barack obama's name in the bioof former president. greg has details next. please like our new facebook page. go to facebook.com/thefivefnc. back in a moment. ♪ ♪ let me tell you about a very important phone call i made.

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♪ ♪ >> greg: terrible song. if you go to official white house website you will find biographies of every president. some nun the obama camp felt there was something missing, greatness of their own leader. so they added to show how obama could improve on their work. after reagan there a bullet

point that says, "in a june 28, 1985 speech, reagan called for a tax code. he did not have lower tax rate than his secretary. today obama calling for the same with the buffett rule." another calls for lyndon johnson ushering in medicare. and another with "don't ask, don't tell" and truman ending segregation. at this point let's put him next to mount rushmore next to george clooney and cast of "glee." anyway, obama reminds me -- he reminds me of a guy at work who signs the birthday card without chipping in for the gift. the roommate who grabs a slice of pizza when he didn't help the pals paint the den. he loves spreading the wealth but man he is a 1% erwith credit. once you get a taste you want it all.

>> kimberly: too much. >> greg: are you route rage raged? >> kimberly: play around on wikipedia. this is self-promotional and narcissistic. this shows how inept the administration is. they don't get it. it's ridiculous. they have a messaging problem. i don't hit the helps them with their own base or independents. >> greg: there is a fly on the table that flew by me. this was obviously done by somebody else. you have to admit, it's funny. this is something to make fun of obama. me, me, me. >> bob: i would make fun of him except for the spider coming up your shoulder right now. i'll say this. i probably would not have done this if i were them. >> kimberly: exactly. >> bob: also that you didn't include in the ma monologue,

which i understand your politics, they added on to grover cleveland, hoover, nixon, ford. now if you are going to just make a play for greatness, you probably would not have included those people in. somebody thought it was a good idea, it was not a good idea. the other thing they should have had was obama doubled the debt, reagan tripled it. >> greg: please. >> bob: oh, please, what? >> greg: oh, please, what? you are skirting the issue. >> eric: attritted to what? $200 billion? now $16 trillion. how is this, bob? no one has increased the national debt even close, no one is close to president obama, of which it increases. don't go there. you know what this is like? president reagan got shot, the as is nation attempt? i got this here. it's me. even though he was fourth in line in presidential chain of command. and when al gore said to wolf

blitzer, i -- i invent -- i took the initiative to invent the internet. maybe not so right. all of them. >> greg: here is the thing. this is we have done this top ache couple of time how humorous "saturday night live" have problems grasping whatever they can about obama that makes people laugh. do you think they cover this? isn't this beautiful, beautiful, beautiful neat for their machine? >> dana: they did. bret baier on "special report" last night talked about it. he almost burst out laughing because there were really good funny things that ended up on twitter. rory cooper of heritage foundation found this doing research. wait a second, that doesn't sound right. i don't understand don't they realize that the white house academia is going to do this for them. the textbooks will be written and the greatness of president obama will be written. there were funny things, the republicans have a sense of humor. this is from the rnc. photographs you hadn't heard about yet.

something that the white house has been working on. president obama signing the declaration of independence. another one. the moon landing, of course! that would be excellent. >> greg: he was there! >> dana: don't forget on a serious note, somebody at the white house has too much time on their hands. this is taxpayer money that pays for the salaries for people actually going back and doing this type of thing. you wonder why they can't do anything. >> bob: another serious note, this is -- obama does enjoy a great deal of people have a positive image of him. he is close, the arrogance thing that is grabbing hold. you've got to think through this. what republicans push about the line being arrogant. you don't feed the beast. you are a popular president. don't feed into this. >> kimberly: don't walk past the sale. freddie we know people like.

this you work with people like this. it's not enough. they want acceptance and approval, they want love. >> kimberly: i'm looking at it. >> greg: looking at you. stop looking at me. coming up, the defense rests in the john edwards trial. closing arguments are next. kimberly got the legal angles covered among other things. and charles krauthammer's takedown of eric holder. if you leave now, blah, blah, blah, dana perino. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ >> kimberly: the u.s. attorney general eric holder gets krauthammered, if you didn't dach o'reilly factor last night. holder and the investigation

for topic of conversation. >> he is a political hack. the justice department is an important jobe. you are the supreme law enforcement initial the country. upholding the rule of law an the constitution. the case the justice department brought in texas against the voter i.d. laws they know they will lose it. why is he doing it? to gin up the issue and agitate the base, presumably the minority. second point, the arizona immigration case, they are going to lose that one, too. they know it. they bring it up for the hispanic vote. >> kimberly: i think i love him as much as dana perino. you don't usually agree. >> bob: i would like to invite charles to be honorary member of "the five." we talk about a story with him every day. first, he is wrong about texas. it has nothing to do with the indiana case. he is wrong about arizona.

he is talking about the hack positions the attorney general has been political for a long time. if i could point out in the previous administration, this guy alberto gonzalez, counselor at the white house, goes to the sick bed of the attorneyien to get him to sign a cover up letter. >> dana: that is not true. >> bob: is it true. he was rewarded being attorney general. >> kimberly: incorrect. erroneous. >> bob: why didn't ashcroft sign it. knew it was a bad letter. >> dana: terrorist surveillance program. i'm not going to get -- that is not what happened. what krauthammer was saying the political friends put in places like h.u. d/b/a, h.h.s., places that you -- like the small business administration. or a place at the commerce department where they hand out business grants. that department should be abolished. or you could be ambassador.

the department of justice eroded -- it was early on with the attorney enjoy eric holder. remember, when he had idea of bringing grit mow prisoners to new york. squashed by their own party. >> bob: that may be the most politicized position if you go back in history and look at it. for trouble in the administration because of attorneys general. >> dana: good point. >> bob: they put their friends in there to cover their butt. >> greg: he is the worst law enforcement officer than barney fife. thanks to holder i can say something never said before. i miss ramsey clark. you know what he is doing with sheriff arpaio, the lawsuit? this is a political, political man. we talk about the danger of drones. you couldn't build a better drone than eric holder. >> dana: they are a lot of things but they're not subtle. >> kimberly: eric bolling? >> bob: arpaio, talk about a

drone. >> eric: go through the list. obama wins about holder is appointed attorney general. the two things they were focused on closing gitmo and bringing ksm back to new york city. neither one of those worked out for them, the wrong political position. fast and furious happens. there are issues like people involved with fast and furious are brought back to washington, d.c. keep a close eye on those who know more than they are talking. that could be clouded in conspiracy. mired in controversy. now joe arpaio, c'mon. give me one success of eric holder. >> kimberly: black panthers. oh, that didn't work either. >> bob: talk about -- >> eric: no, no. eric holder.

>> bob: he is not getting all the favors they want. every justice department is very reluctant to turn over pape torres congress. this goes to every administration i know. >> eric: one positive outcome from the department of justice between n two-and-a-half years. name one. >> bob: i name one for you. the large number of people prosecuted for crossing the border illegally and sent back home. how is that? >> dana: highest number of deportation. that is something -- >> bob: thank you. >> kimberly: it's not department of justice. i take that back. and eric holder never met a document he didn't want to sit on and hide. that is transparent. coming up -- >> greg: can i have that document. >> kimberly: yes, you may. ladainiadana perino on "jeopard" how did she match up against kareem abdul jabbar?

she will tell you up next. she has great behind the scenes stories to tell you. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> bob: getting near the end of the show so liberals are allowed to talk now. >> greg: a joke! i couldn't resist. >> bob: shut up. "wall street journal" ran the story. personalities and the jerks, the jokester, dominator, the

naysayer, quiet plotter. rambleer. that is greg qualifies for all of those. the kind of people in meetings, different personalities to screw up meeting. eric, you are a meeting type of guy. what is the personality you don't like the most? >> eric: i hate meeting i'm not a meeting guy. jokester is fun. assault with a deadly punch line. dominator everyst mates his or her personal view. this one here, negativity. wait until consensus is almost reached and derail you. make objection. >> kimberly: who does that? >> bob: that is wrong. i'm not a naysayer. except for the show. >> dana: that is the only meeting we have. >> bob: never mind. by the way -- >> kimberly: he went through therapy session. >> bob: if you go to the

four-hour seminar. okay. >> greg: you are having two conversations with panel and producers telling you not to say things. >> bob: can you tell me which one you don't like? >> greg: the real meeting killer is the one that comes in and shoots everybody. it happens once in a while. what about the person that enjoys meetings. you have indulge their hobby, their meeting. it's somebody that sits there and goes i can sit here for two hours. that's what i'm saying. >> bob: you know how many meetings in the white house. >> dana: i like the white house meetings because they started on time. they were run perfectly. and if you didn't know what you would be there for, you had no reason to be there.

you're out. >> bob: no wonder you were re-elected. >> dana: donald rumsfeld had standing meetings only. you weren't allowed to sit. you didn't fete comfortable. >> greg: he didn't wear pants either. >> dana: this is for another day. the naysayers were the lawyers. communication people would say oh, it would be great if we did this. no, we can't do that. what about? no. evening you want to say, they would say it can't happen. >> bob: that is right. lawyers are the most boring -- >> kimberly: that is not nice at all. >> bob: sorry. you're not a lawyer anymore. >> kimberly: i am. >> bob: are you still on the bar? >> kimberly: i can't get involved in all of your problems. >> bob: which do you not like most in >> kimberly: talk about our meeting and you want to end it early and you're out and ride the treadmill. >> greg: meetings should be seven minutes long. >> kimberly: you get crank i can. >> bob: he doesn't go to a treadmill. he goes to the bar. >> greg: i go to the stair climber and i read my notes.

>> kimberly: he doesn't like if it goes long. >> bob: does anybody think for example -- i think the rambleer is a real problem. i don't know anybody like that, myself, personally. i'm not a nay-saveer. jokester, yes. dominator, no. >> dana: i don't like the silent plotter. they'll go around and they will lobby beforehand and say, this is a gad segment. so when bob says it won't be, say it will be a good segment. i don't like that. >> greg: i agree with you. jug like you asked me to. >> kimberly: you talk before the meeting. you're in unison. like ten dem. >> kimberly: with all due respect lawyers, they have grown some of the best ideas. >> kimberly: they have saved you, bob. be honest. >> bob: i have had so many of them. >> kimberly: you can't build things anymore. >> eric: this is going nowhere.

speaking of lawyers is it better to ask for forgiveness after or permission first? >> dana: that depends. >> eric: i say ask for forgiveness after. >> dana: that is why you sen message to legal, if you put irk nerk the subject line they return your call right away. >> bob: since i was interrupted at the beginning of the segment and at the end i was dissed, coming up, you will enjoy this question. who is five-feet tall and five times hotter than kareem abdul jabbar? the answer who is greg gutfeld? the answer is dana perino. >> dolly parton wrote working these hours? >> what is 9 to 5. >> you got it again. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ >> dana: so about four weeks ago i got a chance to be on "jeopardy."

i got to play for charity. you have to check your ego at the door. because you probably all know how it turned out. but i had a good time getting there. take a look. >> i'm dana perino in washington, d.c. to be on agenda power playersch everyone was so helpful to get me ready. take a look at my road to "jeopardy." ♪ ♪ >> all right, dana perino, i hear you are going to be on "jeopardy." as colleague, i want to make sure you are prepared an i want to help you warm up. this, president approval rating topped out at 90%. the highest in u.s. history. >> george w. bush. >> you have must answer in the form after question. >> is george w. bush? >> that is correct. let's go to liberals for 2,000. >> okay. >> who is a fellow co-host on the show "the five," the break-out cable hit. in the last year-and-a-half. >> who is the very loveable bob beckel? >> are you excited? >> i am. "jeopardy" folks are great. you get to play with a charity. i'm playing for pet to vets,

helping with veterans with ptsd and connect with rescue animal across the country and helps them both. >> awesome. don't forget to answer in the form after question. >> i have a couple for you. a quiz. >> okay. paying for dinner. >> what is the man should always pay for? >> england's two main exports. >> what is kelp and chocolate. >> what is -- [ inaudible ] >> you did awful. i am concerned. >> now i'm nervous. >> well, you should be. ♪ ♪ >> this is pretty nerve-wracking. huge honor for me. because without having to stay at the white house press secretary i never would have been asked to do this and had a chance to play for this money for a charity i care about. >> this year we accomplish the goal. we actually went over the goa goal. >> we are also -- [ inaudible ]

>> and the families. >> this is "jeopardy"! ♪ ♪ >> do you know i watch you guys a lot. your show comes on during our lunch break. when we tape "jeopardy." i feel as if five of you would become like members of the family. >> your friends. >> yes. >> i am excited to meet you. i have five inch heels and five-foot riser. you have a height advantage. >> it's not going to do me any good when they start asking questions. >> do you have any tips? do you watch "the five," you tell me? >> i think you are probably to not need any tips from me. >> let's go to work in the jeopardy round. now we reveal the category. "the five." >> let's do "the five" for 200. >> "the five" movie rating in

the united states are mp-17, r, pg. pg-13. and this one. >> what is "x"? >> no. >> there are five basic foot positions in this. >> what is ballet. >> what is 9 to 5? >> you got it again. >> what is the civil war? >> good. >> for the final today, we're dealing with the museum and this clue. this has been described as a snail, concrete tornado, even a giant wedding cake. ♪ ♪ dana over to you now. you work in new york. did you get this? >> you weren't able to -- it will cost you how much? 3200. so you drop down to 0. we say goodbye to you. >> dana: as dade told me i got zero points. but i had a great time. it's embarrassing how short i am. >> you know what? alex trabeck should be fired

and replaced with president obama. you only have zero and he had 21,000. spread the wealth around. >> dana: it was great that bob came. nice of you. >> bob: up all night, too. >> dana: i couldn't tell. >> bob: not at all. i think the scam here was that first of all, kareem is a nice guy. not someone you want to hang with. but dana's button was jammed. >> dana: that sounds like an excuse. the clicker thing is difficult. you can't click until the lights come up on either side. and if you do, you get penalized. that is why you see sometimes people going like this. anyway. i couldn't make an excuse. it didn't know some of the answers. >> dana: i want to point out that david faber tweeted out he believed you were on a box

and make sure people understood you were on a box. standing on a box. >> dana: i recall both of us were on boxes and i had heels on. >> bob: don't spraid that around. >> dana: did you notice my handwriting andpy penmans in >> kimberly: i was impressed with that. you did a great job. it takes courage to get up there. >> dana: thank you for all of your support and all of you out there in the tv world and twitter land. one more thing up next. ♪ ♪ if you have copd like i do, you know how hard it can be to breathe and what that feels like. copd iludes chronic bronchitis and emphysema. spiva helps corol my copd symptoms by keeping my airways open a full 24 hours.

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one more thing, greg. kick it off. >> greg: i am officially old. a guy in a band i grew up listening to, the vandals, fantastic band is now running for a seat on the l.a. county superior court. his name is joe escalonte. he is a conservative pro-life christian. but the basis for the vandals, one of the greatest pop bands ever. he is running for judge in los angeles. the election day is june 5. but he will be on "red eye" tonight so tune in and watch "red eye." quite a character. the poster is by shepard perry

who did the infamous obama "hope" poster. >> dana: i'll do mine quickly. chris christie, governor of new jersey and corey booker of newark had, they have a great relationship. this is fun bipartisanship. watch the video. >> any problems you want me to handle? >> no i think we're all set here. >> thanks for coming. there is a two-alarm fire on state street. >> i got this. >> governor, stand back! >> i got this. booker. >> governor romney. >> yes, yes. that was me running in the fire. yes, you are very per situationsive. i'm not a number two guy. excuse me there. >> all right. i got this. >> dana: a little bit of fun getting ready for the press dinner new jersey. >> good guys. both of them. quickly tonight, the dictate

or opens up the sasha barren cohen new movie. >> i am for fair election, equal rights for women. >> he picks off jews, muslims and women. and also what is what everyone heaving on the oil companies? first the must wants, now tonight the eel oil company. bob? >> bob: i know, you know i go to a lot of the alcoholics anonymous meeting. i'm going to start. the slogans from a.a. are important. when you are in your own mind, you are behind enemy lines. i can tell you this. all of you notice you have that committee chatting in your head. it always bugs you and tellles you can't do things. here is the answer. become chairman of the board. do not listen to that thing between your ears. it will kill you. get out of your own mind and you will be in a better place. >> dana: don't call meetings. >> bob: you have to if to

meetings. >> dana: of course. go ahead. >> kimberly: well, we have something special for the sean hannity show. sean will have exclusive interview with author ed klein who will reveal never before heard audio of reverend jeremiah wright talking about an alleged bribe to silence him by the obama campaign in 2008. here is a preview. >> every time i look at that box, with all the things in them, what is in the box? >> e-mail offering me money not to preach. all between the explosion of the media in march and november election. >> e-mail from whom? >> kimberly: monday we said there were tapes. there is the proof. check it out on hannity tonight at 9:00 p.m. eastern. you don't want to miss it. >> bob: one liar talking to another liar. >> kimberly: why are you saying that? >> bob: i'm glad sean has the show, whyou