>> it's not his fault. >> we have to go. >> thanks for watching. have a fantastic weekend, everyone. see you monday. welcome to "red eye." i'm andy levy filling in for greg gutfeld who will be back on monday as long as customs doesn't check his luggage too closely. let's go to paul with our top story. >> our top story, obama supporter and star of "short circuit" criticizes the president for taking too many vacations. or as long periods of time not working or called, gutenberg's. and he is here and year and the miss cal protector of the universe. the super comic the green lantern is coming out as openly gay. robin says, holy duh bad man. and bears are threatened and beaten and forced to skate.

figure skating parents everywhere say, so? >> it is about time you said that. >> let's welcome our guest. she is referred to as the pride of long island by her mother. i am here with lauren sivan, the reporter for kttv in los angeles. and she has been called one of the most talented female comedians of her general rairks but whitney cummings couldn't be with us. and bill schulz who just took bath salts. and next to me is michigan congressman thadius mccoder. and we have pinch. how are you pinch? >> which of the headlines belong to the paper of record? john edwards acquitted on one count. mistrial on five others. and the second, still guilty of being a cheating, lying, disgraceful husband, father and human being. which banner goes to the broad sheet and which to the

tabloid? if you have to ask, you don't know how to read. >> m why pretty sure you don't know how to read. it is a set baying for bagram. he lost steve gutenberg. he expressed disappointment with obama noting, quote, it is hard to believe in the presidency anymore. the gut was asked about the banking crisis saying, quote, i voted for obama, but i don't want to see obama on "the view" and playing firsbie and i don't want to know it is $40,000 at george clooney's house. and i love cloney into. that was gutenberg. and i think he should be at his desk all day. mitt romney was asked about a bunch of hecklers who showed up to shout down obama's senior advisor at a campaign event. >> most of the events i go to, or many of the events i go to, they are large groups of obama

supporters there heckling me. at some point you say what is sac for the gooses -- sass for the goose is sass for the gander. >> you know who is intlisfully unaware? you know who is blissfully unaware? these guys. >> i never get tired of watching synchronized eating. if obama has lost the gut, hasn't he in a real sense lost america? >> i think greg would be hurt you referred to him as the gut. i think gutfeld thinks of himself that way. the fact that somebody was on credit cards.com in the first place, how did that happen? that's the bigger question. here is what i would say if i saw q and a on gutenberg, shut

the door. >> so the gut has spoken, but will president obama's arrogance allow him to listen? >> i think the president probably respects mr. gutenberg's work in the "police academy" films more than anyone. it could be deemed as a very barbed re, ma. but when we look back president carter failed in the presidency, and it was not a fault of the policies. the presidency was too big for one man. ronald regan was elected and the left claimed he didn't spend enough time. the economy turned around and got going and the evil empire got going. so i think he should spend less time managing. >> i don't agree with gutenberg, and it pains me to say that. steve, if you are watching, i feel bad. i don't think the president should be at his desk all

day. everybody is up in arms when the president is taking vacation. it is not like they are turning off their cell phone and not checking their e-mail this they are not in the oval office. you can develop severe symptoms sitting at your desk all day. >> are other celebs turning on him? >> he knows about not working. i'm surprised that was his issue. i thought he was going to stand up and talk about gay marriage considering he raised a baby with two men. >> excellent point. bill, has the gut made you rethink your adoring love for president obama? >> not in the least. first of all he is just upset because he is not on "the view." and he is not invited to

george clooney's party. and secondly, good for the goose is sauce for the gander. sauce for the gander, something like that. i hope romney gave some to the hecklers before they attacked obama. i think one of them said, you sir. you sir are no gentleman. i swore i saw another manus a napkin. >> the actual saying is sauce for the goot and sauce for the gander. >> that would make more sense. >> it is all the sauce. >> congressman, let's talk about the heck lick. heckling. some say it was rude to support the hecklers. what dpow -- what do you say? >> it is a reality of public life. people can protest. >> if you started a cult, i would join it.

i just wanted to throw that out there. >> and she is not susceptible to cults. >> throwing it out there. >> is that exuberance on your face? >> this is what you look like in an earthquake. >> i'm signing up. >> it is cautiously optimistic. >> want to be the grape. >> how do you handle hecklers? >> that's a great question. i'm used to it because i do this for a living. i think everybody should do what i do with hecklers. you just sit on the edge of the stage and weep until everybody leaves. you get paid and nobody wants to mess with you. >> excellent. >> i don't mind you working while you are in the cult. the leader of the cult really can't work.

>> i think this is a great idea. i am liking it more and more. i feel no need to work. this works out great. >> lauren you are in. >> am i being drafted? >> the only way you can get in this cult is to be from long island with boobs. >> i also have ovaries. >> ovaries too. at least one of you does. >> it is from long island and he has boobs. >> what were we talking about? anybody remember? >> long island, boobs. >> something brrrr a goose on the sauce. >> let's move on to the next story. from hecklers to stick leers, so are coffee drinks also on the brink? the new york city mayor mike bloomburg's sugary ban the fraps may not be on tap. the treats were thought to be safe because the plan would not cover beverages with more

than 51% milk. but starbucks employees tell dna info.com that, quote, there is very little 34eu8ging -- milk in them. nobody likes a mark. the mayor slash father was putting his report for national donut day. >> that's ridiculous. >> one is not going to hurt you. >> all of the studies show if the glass in front of you you will eat less. we are not banning you from getting it. if you want 32 answers you have to sit down in your glasses. it is not something the founding fathers fought for. in moderation it is fine. all we are trying to do is explain to people that if you drink a little less you will livelonger. if only you can test the effectiveness of big drinks.

>> you never know where somebody might be hiding a really big drink. >> i wonder if they are hiring of the. >> are you going to stand for him downing your frappuccino. >> i like my coffee. if you are a het row -- heterosexual man ordering a frappuccino with nut sauce? you may have bigger issues. you may want to think that over. can you imagine having to explain to somebody in somalia and say our sodas are so big and so cheap that we need a law preventing us from drinking the big thing all at once. do you guys have that

problem? it is crazy. >> bloomburg is trying to help us. why hospital we let him? >> i think we should let him. without him people want to strap a feed book to themselves and eat until they explode like the movie "seven." i think we need to be stopped with the calorie counting, and it sheds some good light. if you want to drink over 32 ounces at a time, do it like an adult, stand on a porch for the drive by. am i alone? >> i don't think so. >> i grew up on the street. >> you have credit and we don't. >> a group called the center for consumer freedom is running an ad. can we put that up? mayor bloomburg in a dress. it kind of says it all. >> the first is the greatest invitation is the failure to self-govern.

i also want people to know if you join the cult drink what you want eat as much as you want. just bring some home to the leader. >> it is a pretty libertarian cult. >> are you not coming in either. >> there is only room for one libertarian colt. >> will there be a frappuccino black market if this goes through? >> second of all, i don't want to take bloomberg's side here, but i was jaw dropping to find out that this is 17 and a half inches of toffee, yuts, syrup. i have hypoglycemic shock just reading it. that is disgusting. and what was bloomburg thinking posing for that picture. he should have known better.

it is summer. >> didn't rudy guiliani wear a dress? >> saturday night live. >> very flattering. >> mcdonalds tweeted at bloomburg which is fantastic. we trust our customers to make the choices best for them. coca-cola tweeted something similar in the day. thank god for big corporations, right? >> if mcdonalds trusts their customers to make their own decisions, i think that this soda size is where it should end. i have been to many mcdonalds and i don't want them making many decisions. >> amy, what kind of world do we live in where you can eat another person's face, but you can't get a large coke at a movie theater. >> that's a great question. >> i wrote it myself. >> i don't believe that. what was the question?

>> i don't know somebody else wrote it. >> how many calories ? >> if you don't swallow, you don't worry. that's what i always say. >> good rule. >> why are we worried about it. it is not going down. >> congressman, last week do you agree that mayor bloomburg is a huge jerky jerk face who is a jerk. >> no, i think he is misguided. >> cut his mic. >> we are moving on. from frapulous to fab bus, a friend of dorothay, and on friday it came through to out one of the main characters, green lantern is gayer than an apple-tini. he had a wife and kids, but the new reboot has the character fresh and fierce.

quote, allen is a type a personality who doesn't hide in the shadows. i hope if there is a kid out there reading the comic and worried about the person he is, maybe it will give them a positive sense of who he is. as for ultra cat on her three -- was actually bitten by a i had radio active spider. amy, you said before the show -- this surprised you and made you want to move to uganda. >> that was talking about the face eating. >> did i get that confused? >> yes. i just like uganda. major vaca. i am totally happy about this. there is no sprens for me. when a guy talks about comic book it is imagine -- it is

imaginable. it is powered by a ring. >> i recent that. >> back in the day -- are you okay there? do you want me to wait? we will just take a minute. keep the camera on lauren. >> got it. >> lauren, back in the day the original green lantern was powerless against wood. so in retrospect -- >> are you serious? >> aren't all comic book heros are gay? >> they are all in gay shape. i didn't know any of them were straight. >> you can't see most of their

nipples through the costumes. >> what kind of .y -- what part of .y shoes are we not getting. >> a lot of masks going around. joy a plan -- >> a lantern is the secret power? >> it is a ring. it is jewelry. >> but he coordinates the lantern. >> where is the contraception? >> we need -- we made a new super he row. >> congressman, did you want to go on record with the new gay lantern? you have parents and other adults to ream them. tell them what to do. >> nobody is saying what the you that do. last question, it is a bit of a serious one. dc is taking a lot of heat saying they came out and said the gay character was going to

be an iconic character. it is an it was an earth 2 story. >> i looked up the word iconic because i read ahead and saw what you were going to ask me. he was originally in the -- it started in the 40s, but i never heard of allen scott before the story comes out. >> a great name. >> yes, why is it all mike brown. joe. not thadius. >> that is a super hero name. i have some ideas for a costumes. >> she has to wear a mask because she goes to the bars and the. guys are -- and the gue are --

>> time for a break. coming up, is men's porn use lispinged to unhappy -- linked to unhappiness? you are watching fnc so stick around.

does kim jong-un think animals are fun? the parent company mega ultra super corp has a north korean circus showing jump roping

brown bears and basketball playing bar boones. take a peep, peep takers. >> jumping through a hoop and being held by a roller skating bear and a female trainer. the final game saw the baboons given basketballs at one end of the rim. they whizzed across the floor and slam dunked them into mini nets. >> i feel like we can see more of that. do we need more? >> the female bear in the gold dress swing the rope to jump over. the animals are ordered to leap frog over one another as the crowd clan and cheer. the human male trainer. the shocking footage and aping

gear among the animal rights -- and anger among the animal rights protesters. >> so three animal rights groups issued a joint statement expressing outrage saying the bears this this footage seem distressed, frightened and fig discomfort. it is shameful to use baboons in this way. i have to say i agree with the animal rights groups on this one. >> really? >> how are you supposed to use a baboon? >> i would think i would say i am not. >> let me tell you who is angry. north koreans because they don't have rolling states or matching sum p stiewts and hula hooping. >> that was my question. there is chance. >> having returned from south

korea to north korea and i agree with you. >> thanks for adding that. >> did you do a voice over on that? >> amy, i didn't even think -- i don't think i knew a bear could look miserable until i watched this video. >> i don't know. if that clip it looked like they were having a blast. i think it is good. let these animals reach their pull potential. i can't even talk about it. the video made me cry. i went from zero to sobbing. it was so awful. at least the babbons are doing, the bear was standing there and you just wanted to cry. i have seen set shows in amsterdam less depressing. bill, are we sure that those were actual animals 1234* i think there was a

decent chance those were north korean children. >> look at the critical tones of this reporter. there is a hiewched outrage and then this guy will fill outrage. it provides at least 20 minutes of footage and more footage i have ever seen. >> i used -- >> that was fascinating. >> i used the trick of watching as much video to show how outraged qlm. i am. >> go on-line and see the rest. it is honestly an hour. so, do you have a comment on the show? e-mail us. to leave a voyt mail call -- why this 21 stwo-tour 62 -- 212, 462-5050. >> tonight is sponsored by remote control. the handheld devices used to

operate tvs or other items from a distance. thanks, report control.

welcome back. let's find out if we have gotten anything wrong so far. for that we go to paul. >> hi, andy. >> i paused because i forgot that i was the host.

>> this is awkward. it is like how you are with women. a couple things. bill, i love you. you have to button up the shirt a little bit. too much chest. >> i was working on it, but it is over my button here. >> that's okay. >> let me see if it will get closer. >> congressman, quick question, why so upbeat tonight? >> i'm the am buds man. >> i am suicidal just looking at you right now. >> you have much to be suicidal about. >> touche, sir. i want to join a cult. let's talk about gutenberg. this whole thing about the president taking a vacation. it is not like he lives in a sparse house. he has an awesome lifestyle. as it is he lives in a mansion and bowling alley and situation room and steven spielberg in a closet who sites lines for him. is vacation a big problem here

, congressman? >> apparently not. >> i'm sorry. >> apparently not. he is quite good at it. the president works hard and they do need their time away. this is the people's house and they will -- >> but they did this with bush and it falls flat on the person people. >> it may make you rethink your suicidal tendency. but you are right. you will be judged upon your performance and you can get the job done in your office or outside the office they want the job done. >> well done, you should be a congressman. gutenberg says he has a friend making $7 an hour at done endo nuts and he can't get $9 at a country club. do you think he was talking about himself?

>> when i heard that yiewtenberg, your bff works there. you know he goes in and makes small talk and feel a sient. 4* cash dash saint. gutenberg can't hook him up? >> that meant a lot and i gave him half off his next coffee. how many times have you done that? >> gutenberg is capable of so much. >> bill, if you are going to do a controversial interview doesn't it make sense where the alcohol lengthing follow-up is good. how do you feel about reward points? >> for me that is not a challenging question. you came into duncun one time and asked me that question. >> do you want fries? >> and i was staring at your freakishly bald chest. >> i am showing more boobs than the girls. >> i want to get into the cult. >> you are not getting into the cult.

moving on to the hecklers, when romney says he is a job creator is this the crappy job he meant. >> are they getting paid to heckle? heck -- heckling is volunteer work, isn't it? >> they did scream at david axelo, but they didn't strap him to the roof of a car, right? >> you are a real glass half full type of guy. who is this? mark ruffalo looks like [bleep]. >> congressman, stay awake. lauren, i never heard from the sphraiz what is sauce from the goose. any idea where this came from? that was my points. what is good for the goose is good for the began deer.

gander. cant that it? -- >> no it is not. >> paul, if you could do my job you would have looked that up and found out that is the phrase. >> i did and couldn't find it. >> why does mitt romney anything about the shot? >> i don't know what your problem s. it is not for me to say. i understand if you are not comfortable talking about it on air. >> i am uncomfortable with everybody running around with all of saws. that can be dangerous. >> i have always said if you make out with a goose, yea, gander. >> i say wear a nuva ring if you are porking out with the goose. dash you are making out with

the goose. >> it is like the bleachers of the royals game. >> when you look up sauce for the goose, did you put an h in front of every word. is that maybe you why you couldn't find it, idiot? >> paul, in the cult there is no judgment. what time does the spacecraft leave? >> no spacecraft. >> moving to bloomburg, lauren two 16 ounces instead of a 32 ounce. don't you think people who are going to consume that much stuff have no problems going back for seconds. you get a one and a second one? >> should i be reading between the lines or something? >> do whatever you want with it. >> sure if you really want to hydrate yourself like some death valley irrigation prog yect. project. >> it is useless because

people will get two of the thing that is less. >> look. if you are going to get your big guld -- gulp, you only have two hands. you have to go back. that's uh noising. >> what about people who only have one arm. >> or a baby. >> this should be it violates the americans with disabilities act. >> you do the iv soda thing. you walk tarnd with an iv of owe do. >> get the job done. >> i like that idea. >> a job is a job. >> maybe it leads to black market 32 ounce containers or stuff being sold in back alleys. 10% cola and 90% rc cola. >> i think you make the costs

go up. bill want to know what jobs are getting done. >> we are creating -- >> we have finding something for steve guttenburg to do. >> we are expanding. >> your horizon. >> talking seriously about the high friewk toes -- fructose stuff, you will get in shape. amy, don't you think this is great because it will reflect its own readers in that many of them haven't seen a woman naked. >> i think they saw too much of their moms naked. >> andy is shaking his head because it is hitting home. >> i am shaking my head at the cheap hacking neighbor of your votes. >> did you just think of that one or pre write it?

>> what was the thoughtful issue? >> we covered the important issues. we talked about gay shape, jewelry providing power. i think we covered it. >> congressman, do we get to wear tight greenspan decks when we join the cult. >> you get nike shoes and jogging. >> your case won't beness sear. your case won't be necessary. >> thanks for killing the energy. is my little pony for big kids too? it is "the world of my little pony." an unauthorized guide. first, is being a 29-year-old virgin an accomplishment? i know we did this story last week, but some p to picks are that important, people.

is keeping your v card really that hard? last week we told you olympic track and field star lolo jones confirms she is a 29-year-old virgin calling it the hardest thing she has done in her life, harder than even training for the olympics. emily sire wonders wonders if staying uncorrupted is an accomplishment. it insults the will power that jones devotes to her sport or any personal endeavor other than abstinence. she said her virginity is a gift i want to give give husband, end quote. you are saving something for somebody you haven't even met yet? >> lightning roooouuuunnnddd. lightning round. >> lauren, we talked about this on the show last week. i'm sure you saw it. the general consensus was good for her if that's what she wants to do. but is there a point?

is she making too big a teal. >> i think the reason she said it was the hardest thing she had to do in her life because -- >> is that not -- >> lauren is providing jobs for everybody. thanks editing staff. lolo called her -- hers a gift to her husband. what will you be giving your husband? >> what is left. >> she mentioned it is the hardest thing she has ever done in her life. the hardest thing i have done, his maim was ron and there was a lake and a blanket. it may have been a towel. what is an afghan? >> it was the congressman's cult. >> i think that was a person

from afghanistan. >> we were laying on an afghan guy. >> i honestly wanted to see where the story was going. >> congressman, does he deserve credit for admitting it publicly and maybe it helps out other people who -- i don't know. i have no idea. >> bill quickly? >> good for her. i go back to it, giving somebody her virginity is not something in this day and age. i don't know anyone has a desire to get it. for one of those who wants to be a track stud, that's a lot harder than mott having sex. not having sex, you sit in the couch. >> you run faster after you have had sex. >> women weak in the knees. i was a good track star

because i had no women in my life. >> a new study shows whose partners look at porn are less happy than dudes who pass on the stuff. furthermore, men's porn can hurt the self-esteem of girlfriends and wives, but finding smut on his computer made them feel like they were not good enough and measure up. women's feelings ranged from scathing to mildly positive. should women just accept that guys -- not me, but other guys like to look at porn and realize it is not a reflection on them? >> as a christian -- no, just kidding. i wanted to say that. notice they said the study says young ladies. when i was younger i remember feeling bummed out my boyfriend looks at porn. now i'm on board. more women would get on board if they stop looking at cheating. it can be a fun addition. now i'm into stuff twice as

creepy as the dude i am seeing now that i think about it. but i didn't write any jokes because i was distracted because somebody sent me a link to in different cats in the background of amateur porn, and it is till lair yous. hilarious. >> they are playing on the iphones ? >> they are cats, no thanks. >> lauren, you are itching to talk here. >> i think this is a bigger problem for women who watch porn. if you are dating a dude and he asks you to do a crazy you have seen in a porn know and you have to say, oh, i have never done this before. that's the toughest part. >> congressman, last word to you. aren't you glad you came on the show tonight? >> well, i have two new followersment -- followers. time to take a break. when we return, i will ask the congressman some questions.

so, last week it was announced there was a petition mistake.

thadius mccotter will not be on the ballot. while many considered him to be a shoe in for re-election, the error could cost the gop republican house seat. but he is planning to use the write in votes to win the nomination. let's talk to him about it. first of all, congressman, dude, really? >> well, no in all seriousness, i had to have questions -- requests to find out why signatures were submitted and past positions that were passed off. in the end i believe they will be sum marle rejected the secretary of state and attorney general investigation commenced yesterday, and we will go through with the process. we have seen write ins win in the past. we will reach out and see what happens. i have told people i would everything i could to get my name on the ballot and get to the bottom of this. that's where it stands.

>> the detroit news had an article. they basically said writing campaigns rarely succeed in michigan expru not allowed to put stickers anywhere. people have to remember them and right them. doyou do you think they have a -- you have a chance of pulling this off? >> i wouldn't ask people to support me if i didn't think so. the news is partially liked. they are disfavored so you have to work to -- to work. *9 people who vote against me will be able to put the profanity in front of it and put it on the ballot. >> a former state attorney general, my cox, he said, quote, it is clear he doesn't care about congress anymore. response? >> when you leave your wife

and children and have a 95% voting record despite running for president and the police officers association of michigan and others it seems to me those speak for themselves. there are detractors who may have other ambitions. my job is to go for the lighting and campaign and get the voters who want to vote for me. >> if this failed and take the time to get in? >> if i did i wouldn't have an open shirt. >> that's the problem. #*r. >> you look good, girl. >> actually you could be for all i know. >> we haven't seen you in a s nie glet. i hillary serve. >> last question, people want to blame your presidential bid for distracting you from all of this. is there anything to that? >> that is idiotic. the campaign -- i don't watch the radio. >> i don't like those words.

>> i don't like a car. >> i don't have a mom. >> the paw session -- petition started and was supposed to be done a month ahead of time. the people that make that argument simply are just mistaken. >> that's a nice way of saying it. thanks for talking to us. >> thanks for the lovely segue. >> in your time of distress. >> i am sitting here with you. >> we'll close things up with a post game wrap up with paul mccurio. go to fox news.com.

don't forget you can watch us saturday at 2:00 a.m. eastern time and 11:00 p.m. pacific. a new "red eye returns on monday and so does greg. guests include diane ma say dough and penn gillette on

monday. time to go back to paul mccurio for the post game wrap up. >> thanks, andrew. tell me about your upcoming gigs. >> june 6th i am at the punch line in atlanta. june 11th sky city stie and june 23rd the hour special taping at the fill more in san francisco. jay tell me about your pod cast. >> i have a pod cast? >> congressman, do you want to wish somebody a happy birthday? >> yes, my co-host on "the view" a happy 30a30 day. >> and i can be seen june 8th and 9th belmore and long island at the broke ridge comedy club. are you coming? thought a chance. thanks, paul. a special t