recession. if you must know, that is on page 46. so i did read it. watch sean hannity exclusive interview with george zimmerman 9:00 p.m. eastern. that's it for "the five." thank you for watching. we will see you tomorrow. ♪ welcome to "red eye." it is like "charles in charge" if by charge you mean chap. now to andy levy for a pre game report. w45* is coming up on tonight's show, old sport? >> do his prosthetic legs give an olympic runner an unfair advantage? some say no, but others, well, hopefully it won't be much of a discussion. and a film critic gives "the dark knight rises" a bad review and others react calmly and rationally. and what happens when we send bill out on the streets to see if native new yorkers can pass as a master caby taxi exam?

hopeful leahy is taken for a ride. >> thanks, andy. >> you bet jie. that's all? >> that's all. >> no back and forth? >> no, i am too focused. >> you are focused? >> like a laser. >> on tonight's story? >> not even a little. i am focused on the midnight showing of "dark knight rising." >> i was being sarcastic. it is terrific you are not focused on tonight's story. >> i missed that. >> you know why? >> because i am focused. >> go away. let's welcome our guest. she is so hot cats don't get in heat. they get in lori rothman. i am here with business anchor lori rothman. are you shocked by that? you have been on this show many times. >> that's a new low. >> shut up. if jokes jokes were crustaceans he would give us all crabs. the host of a comedy game show called "bunk." it is on demand as well. and in poe land he is considered a party favor, my sidekick, bill schulz. and if exceptional reporting was a sandwich i would fill

him with meet. sitting next to me rick fulbaum. and he is a sad disgrace you want to punch in the face. our new york times correspondent. good to see you, pinch. >> today's room for debate section asks the question, does stop and frisk work? hmm. let's test this firsthand, shall we? intern, porch. >> there is his laptop, yes, yes. and there is the joint! there is the joint. intern porch, do you have anything to say for yourself? >> i am hungies. >> stands to reason, you have the munchies. >> hungies! >> and scene. >> it is like the worst episode of "zoom" ever. >> or the best? >> no, the worst episode of "zoom" ever.

>> best. >> not even a tedious version of "the electric company." is breaking the regs by not having legs? this paraolympian has qualified in the able bodied 400 meters despite the fact that he is running on two carbon fiber blades, probably made in china. and former olympian michael johnson doesn't like it one bit. when asked if oscar's inclusion is inspiring or political correctness gone a muck, quote, my position is because we don't know for sure if he gets an advantage from the prosthetics, it is unfair to the able bodied competetors. indeed while he has been cleared to compete in 2009, two scientists claim his man-made gams, quote, give him a clear and major advantage while enhancing his sprint running speeds by 15 to 30%. that's a lot. that's like almost 15 to 30%. meanwhile, let's see how the london olympic mascot blokie

is handling this controversy. in fairness, that might have been stress related. we don't know if that was alcohol related. i wanted to put that out there. kurt, are you a comedian. what if all of a sudden you were in a comedic competition, and this other comedian showed up, and he had a computer that gave him jokes that were slightly funnier than yours? >> i would want him killed. i would cutoff his legs and give him prosthetic legs. it wouldn't be just the computer helping him at that point. thank god we have michael johnson to put disabled people in their place. i will take it one step farther saying they should not be able to compete in anything. also full disclosure, a man in a wheelchair once stole my girlfriend. seriously. i understand his point, but man it makes him look like a

[bleep]. >> you nailed it though. you nailed it because you know there is a point to be made, especially when you look at the runners that he beats and they are looking -- you don't know if they are angry because they are losing or angry because he is winning. they are like, wait a second. is he better than me? you notice the great way i am running? i was doing this. it looks like i am cross country skiing. >> you run with sticks. >> that's the thing. in a way, rick, isn't what's his name -- what is the guy's name, oscar? >> michael johnson. >> is he doing everyone a favor by assuming the role of a [bleep]. >> we don't have to be. it is a great story. how could you not be inspired by what this athlete has overcome, and the fact that he is able to do what he does. >> but -- >> but cough -- caveat before the but,. >> the lee majors.

>> you combined steve austin with lee majors. >> putting them together we can rebuild him. i checked this out so andy wouldn't give me a hard time later. he is also competing in the paralympic. >> yes. >> that makes sense. obviously let him run against other athletes that are overcoming similar challenges. >> then why can't michael johnson participate in the paralympic? >> he can. we just have to cut of -- off one of his legs. >> i guess you could. >> do we have to go that far? what if he just has add? >> that is an impediment. >> or carpal tunnel. >> or maybe slightly depressed. >> anxiety. >> let's get him blackout drunk and put him in the race anyway. >> is he going the wrong way? >> by the i what, just to clarify, you were referring to lee majors who played -- >> the "six million dollar man." >> do you remember who "the seven million dollar man"? >> i do not. >> played by monty he is dead now.

can't remember his name. here is the thing, right now this is okay. the reason why is because oscar is not a great runner, so he is not probably going to place. he will not win a medal, so it is not a big deal. at some point these prosthetic limbs will be a big deal because the technology is improving. they will have to face this question sooner or later, am i right? >> even the runners in the race who are not the leaders, the leading runners, they have to be ticked off this guy will likely be ahead of him even though his time is slower. there was a scientific study that that the prosthetic legs give an advantage, but i don't know if i buy that of a one study. >> you can see it. it is amazing. it really speaks to human innovation. >> so it is the apples to apples discussion. it needs to be an even playing field. it opens the door to -- >> are you saying we should put apples on the playing field? >> yes, to test them. >> you are so weird.

i think we should replace you with a robot. bill, you have legs which some say is unfair. you don't deserve them. >> they don't want me to walk. they would rather i stay where i am so they can be over there. >> what is your response -- okay. a paraolympian to a critic, they would be happy to trade this so-called advantage for mike's actual legs. how would you respond to that? it is like, okay, if you think we are better, let's trade. >> here is how i would respond to that. by the time 2016 comes along, two things will happen. these things will make them go double the speed they go now, and hillary clinton will be president. i think we all know that. 2016, hillary. i am ?ot going to take that -- i am not going to take that, oh i will trade places with you. oscar is dating the number one russian supermodel in all the world. >> no. >> oh yes. >> no. >> i have her name and can't pronounce it.

anastacia -- there are lots of s' in it. he is dating her. she is coming to the olympic to support him. i have all of my legs. i can't even get an 80-year-old russian maid to date me. i've got all my legs, all three of them. call me. >> every guest says that. we will do something about that. we will put a partition. i think it is an amazing story. it really is. we are getting to a point where having a lack of anything is no longer a problem. i think that's what the story is about. do you see how i changed the tone of my voice? >> you got really gentle. >> i have to go baying to your earlier point of speaking of human innovation? have you seen those? they are springs. >> they are cool. >> they are cool, sure, but i feel like why weren't those invented 100 years ago? it looks like a part of an old train in 1850. that's all he is wearing. it took us that long to find

spare parts at an oughts toe yard? -- auto yard? >> this story is a pc ball pit. you climb in and get lost. i think we treaded it well, didn't we? >> i hope so. that's why we didn't do this story last night. paul mccu ri o was on and he would have done something stupid. we can all agree. >> he says stupid things. >> yes, i am still making fun of you, paul. >> from leg lift to class list. should not liking batman mean your brain should go splat man. that seems to be the position of angry nerds who are on a rampage of movie viewers who are talking talking about "the dark knight rises." they called the film lumpish and tedious and found himself getting threats of violence and death. with some commenters inviting him t.o. die in a fire and another -- to die in a fire and another talking about beating him with a thick rubber hose, something i pay extra for. and all of this lead the review site rotten tomatoes to shutdown the bat film, the first time in history.

i believe we have an interview with one of the commenters. >> you want to hear about the greatest movie ever made? a crime the joker would commit. jay -- >> have you seen the movie yet? >> no. >> that was equal parts disturbing and disturbing. that's weird. he is down there all the time. kurt, should the internet be shutdown forever? >> well, yes,100%. if they will shut a bunch of nerds up, we should totally destroy the internet. internet commenters are the lowest life form. i think he took it one step further and hunted and killed them. >> that is an interesting movie idea. >> it would really surprise people. the violence would be

surprised. >> it would. that's the best kind of violence. you don't see it coming. >> rick, what should happen to idiots that would make that threat? law enforcement will tell you, it is not the people who make death threats you worry about, it is the people who don't. those are usually the people that kill you. it is not like mark david chapman wrote lennon a letter. wow, way to bring it down, greg. >> you can track them down once they have posted on a website. you can find them, right? >> i believe so. boy, are you 70? >> feels like a footprint or something like that. rotten tomatoes is worried about this happening again when the hobbit movie comes out. >> really? >> i thought that was interesting. we have this comic book nerds, your word, and these people that are middle earth obsessed with the hobbit. just because somebody says the movie you love that you are obsessed about is tedious doesn't mean you have to move out of your parents' house. they can still live there.

they don't have to get so worked up. >> i love how you brought it full circle. we just showed footage of a hobbit dressed as batman and you brought up the movie. he lives in our office, and to get past the bridge, you have to answer his riddle. >> answer is riddle is more of a metaphor for something else. >> yes, and that's why hr has made sure he is no longer here. lori, you are a heavy internet commoner. how many death threats a week do you leave? >> that's the thing. you are anonymous. is that the gwenyth paltrow site? >> no, it is not the gwenyth paltrow site. >> she has the caw lon nicks and stuff on there. >> and recipe. >> what is wrong with the calonics? you feel great. >> sometimes you find pennies. >> go ahead. >> i am distracted. i am trying to get my train of thought here. isn't that the beauty of internet posting that you don't necessarily have to be -- to share your identity. do you really take these death

threats seriously? i don't twitter. i am behind the 8 ball. >> you just said 8 ball. you are not that naive. >> that is an old saying. >> this is a glass table for a reason. >> but the anonymity is what makes batman so successful. he hides behind a mask. why can't the commenters? >> exactly. they should. >> you are agreeing with me? >> do you know where you are right now? >> why do the fox news anchors always do drugs before we go on? >> i am so more tau fight. >> you are a huge batman fan, yet you don't know how to use a computer. do you register death threats from the stained mattress? >> stick them into a bottle and throw them into the hudson. >> i was about to make an amazing point. the market is closed.

>> you know what that was this that was your dealer. >> the show is still on a-block. hold the wipe for later tonight, smilely face. >> i think i need more than usual. >> good lord, lori. there are kids watching. >> last time i was falling asleep. >> you ain't asleep now. you are really awake tonight, lori. you are also freaking us out. >> back to batman. >> well, very briefly, my theory is this. when media critic started airing their reviews the first night people were able to see it it was gang busters, 4 stars, 4 stars, 90%. then the lesser known critics saw that, and they realize the only way they were going to get known and get natures is find parts they didn't like and make them bigger. people would read the reviews and people would get known and

it would backfire. we called them on their crap. that movie is going to be perfect. they did that to get known and they deserve the death threats. i didn't send any, can't emphasize that enough, but they deserved it. >> i had a batman -- >> underoos? >> no. >> the corgie the car. >> oh yes. >> i lost it and had to go to the er. but it was something i played with all through my life. >> did they find it? >> yes, they found it. i wasn't allowed to play with it for awhile. >> isn't that a car for the dog to drive? >> yes, the doggie car. >> the corgie made the green hornet and the monkey car? why am i talking about this. >> the monkey car? >> you remember the monkey car. i put you in the monk key car every night. what is it like to be fox news anchor where your life is driven by news.

we look to his book, i don't know. i huff paint all the time. up next, is family the most important thing? on the planet? whoa. this is not a story on strippers ? what is this, huckabee?

they don't think dad is all that rad. a recent survey of more than 2,000 british teenagers named liam finds most kids are embarrassed by their old man. it was a 13 to 21-year-olds are ashamed of dad's clothes and feels he is dilutional. the snotty free loaders cited the glass as high wasted pants and socks with sandals. that's my saturday, actually.

75% also said they were embarrassed by things their dads said in front of other people. said a spokesperson for the company who did the survey, quote, most of us have been embarrassed by our old man at some point. that was kind of redundant. meanwhile, some fathers are just as embarrassed at their children's choice of wardrobe. >> turn around. slowly, keep your hands up so you can see how you look. you look like you stole midget pants. squat down some more. you can't even do it. that is ridiculous. >> well said, fine sir. if your kids think you are uncool does that mean you are doing a good job as a parent? >> i think so. my kids are so young they do not know how uncool i am. but i know that day is coming, and i am preparing for it. those san dahls and the socks and the pants you can pull up to your arm pits, i am collecting them in the closet jie. you have a lot of kids. >> four kids.

>> amazing. >> but they are little and they like hanging out with me. >> how little are they? this big? are you sure they are kids? are they bunnies? >> some are hairless. >> they eat a lot for bunnies, if they are bunnies. >> did you g to that store and they told you they are kids? those are hairless cats. you with a weird owe. why do moms get away so easy. you are a mom and texting your child just now. horrible mother, by the way. mothers know not to be cool? they don't try? >> we don't try. and honestly if any kid thinks their mother is cool, that mother or father, for that matter, is letting that kid get away with too much you know what stuff. >> how old are your kids? >> 5 and 3. >> so when they get older their friends are going to really like you. >> and they are already hahn re. the older one is going into kindergarten and she has a mouth on her and i don't want to be her friend. >> i was talking about her kids' friends when they hit puberty. >> they hate me.

>> i aspire to be a milf. >> you don't have to aspire. you are there. i don't even know what it means. >> that's the first nice thing you said to me. >> i say a lot of nice things. why do dads try so hard to be friends rather than just be dads? >> dads want to be bros. dads are used to being bros and then they are in a position where they have to be lame. cool dads are creepy dads. you don't want like hey, do you want to drink beer in my basement? no. that guy is creepy. this is weird that this is even news. what is next? headline, cops, not as cool as we thought they were. >> it is true. where i grew up it was always, oh, they are the house where you can go over and drink. we don't want you to drink and drive, so you can always come over. you are always welcome here. why? they just want to hang out with you. they talk a little too much, and sometimes they get a

little too close. >> mom has a full glass of shard nay. >> come into my room. >> the dad asking if you had gotten any lately, and he is just staring at you. you have a feeling he is not imagining the woman. he is imagining you. >> turns out they don't have kids at all. you are like, why am i here? >> all they have is a basement. >> you guys are sick. >> and some muzzles. >> bill, your dad is in prison for multiple you murders. >> it is tough. con jaw gal visits are only for the wife. i don't see him much any anymore. >> it is very sad. >> it is very true. the boston strangler, they finally caught him. >> are you telling me your dad pinned it on another guy? >> successfully for awhile. who has the big mouth? i cannot keep a secret. >> explains so much.

>> i want to see this study five years from now. i don't go out much, but i watch a lot of reality tv. dads are not the problem. moms are the problem. back five years ago moms were moms. they w jeans. they were doing their thing and weren't trying to be cool. now they are botoxed up the wazoo. they are dressing their their daughters and hitting on their sons. moms are the new dads. >> that's actually a good point. >> it is happening. >> you know what really sucks is with the breast implants you can't even have a decent grandmother anymore. >> no, you have a hot grandmother. >> you have a grandmother with an amazing body and a sh ru nken apple face. that's not a grandmother. grannies are supposed to look like grannies and huggable. >> why can't she make you an apple pie and be smokin? i think that's great. that's america. >> we have to take a break. >> i'm traumatized. >> we have learned a lot about

each other. this is a great show. >> a lot of bonding here. if paul mccurio were here he would say something unfunny and we would go to the teds. if you have a comment on the show go to red eye at fox news.com. to leave a voicemail it is 212-462-5050. still to come, the half time report -- from tv's andy levy. >> tonight's half time report is sponsored by mouse. those large members of the deer family found in the forest of north america known for their large antlers. thanks, moose.

welcome back. let's find out if we got anything wrong so far. for that -- what is going on andy levy? >> no idea. >> we did a good job? >> eh. do prosthetics give olympic runners n a unfair advantage? you said the blades he runs on was made in china? >> that was in reference to the uniforms. >> was it? >> yes. >> i have facts anyway. the flex foot chee that yous which is the name of what he is wearing was invented by an american, but in 2000 he sold his company to a company that has branches in 15 companies including china, so it is possible. >> i was right? >> problem blay not, but one out of 15 chance you are

right. >> the only time i am right is when i am trying to be wrong. i think i could be right. >> there is a slight chance you are right. >> it is funny, iceland. >> what is that? >> i was saying how funny iceland is. >> why is that? >> i don't know. >> to all of our fans in iceland. >> nothing really. i just said this place is funny. when i think of iceland, it is funny. bjork is funny. >> bjork is funny. he is a great guy. you said we have michael johnson to put disabled people in their place. but it does make them look like a jerk. this is a guy who wore gold shoes in the 1996 olympics. he is not the first time he looked like a jerk. >> he's into it. if that's his thing, he is continuing a prod tradition of jerkdom. >> you said he is the steve majors of track and field. then you said you checked it out so i wouldn't give uh hard time.

maybe spend more time getting the name straight. >> i love how you are laughing, but secretly thinking about killing him. if your head you are like punching him in the face. >> i do have a point here though. the flex foot cheetah is not really a by bionic, but the company that makes them makes actual bionic feet, knees and the world's first and only complete bionic leg. >> are they called cheetahs? that sounds an awful lot like cheaters. interesting. not really. >> i love that show. >> that's the greatest show ever. they used to look in the camera and say do you want to look at this now? >> andy what doou have in your hand? >> what is that? >> what do you have in your hand? >> paper. >> the other thing. >> a sonic screwdriver. no big deal. >> dr. who? >> by the way, these bionic

legs, they are capable of realtime self-adjustments because they have advanced artificial intelligence, wireless communication systems and advanced biomechanic cal designs. >> they are already better than us. >> pretty cool. along the same topic, the $7 million man's name, barney miller. >> no way. >> yes. >> that must have been before barney miller. >> i think it was. he he was a race car driver who lost both arms and both legs in a crash. then they turned up the bionics too high and he went nuts and started attacking osi and then steve austin got him and they turned him down. >> it was the first did the 6 million man that was two parts and then followed by. >> "big foot." >> that's right. >> i love how they raise the stakes. >> how much are you? >> $6 million. >> how much are you? >> 7 million. >> they say inflation.

that's the joke. it was during the carter era. >> "dark knight rises" gets death threat. i love a movie about hunting and killing commenters. >> do you have money to make it? >> sadly, no. >> i can write it. >> i can help you write it. >> no, that's okay. >> but you can have cool catch phrases. >> i almost puked in my mouth. >> you want me to help you now, right? >> no doubt about it. >> it is comments like that that make movies earn over a million dollars. >> i have the name. >> i will keep it at 99 if we can keep comments like that out of it. >> have i a name for it. >> what is it. >> troll hunter. >> that's not bad? >> you don't like it? >> troll hunter is great.

i am copy writing that after i tape the show. don't try, viewers at home. you don't even know how to do it. >> like you do? >> i don't. >> and i probably won't do it. >> there was a movie a couple years ago called "troll hunter." >> really? >> that was about actual trolls. >> it is either from the control room or i just made it up. we will never know. the voice in my head said it was a norwegian film. >> who is in your ear? >> i don't know. ant man, i think. >> speaking of super heros, don't compare super cool fans to the freaks who like "lord of the rings." it is not cool. >> sorry. >> lori, how could you agree with greg that internet commenters are like batman? >> well -- they have masks

on. you don't know their identity. i like that analogy, actually. >> were you just checking texts and don't know what he said? >> i was checking afterwards. you don't have kids to emphasize. >> the sitter is going to be like watching this show later. oh great, the kids hate me. who is their sitter? >> there are sitters who are not comfortable with me. >> i wasn't here last night to call out that idiot for being an i idiot. i felt bad. sorry, paul, next time. >> do you find your sitter from the flier that says "i can sit for your kids" and you tear it off the list. >> they cut them off and take it. >> that's a good place to go. >> there or craigs list. >> i think his name is dan smith. >> he will teachers and you baby-sitting. >> critics who give "dark knight rises" bad reviews are doing it for the attention and deserve the death threats?

>> yes. >> you were joking about deserving the death threats. >> don't say anything. we will have to edit it out. >> you have no proof that's what they are doing. >> that was my opinion. that was my theory, hypothesis. >> should point out that marshall fine didn't like "the dark knight" either. of that movie wrote, quote, i am trying to figure out why so many people got so worked out about this bloated self-imported movie. it kind of blew in the same way "spider-man 3" blew. >> you know what i love? contrarians and the fact they think it is cool. >> no critic should ever, ever get threats of violence or death. no critic should ever, ever compare "the dark knight" to" spider-man 3". >> why did they have to make "gone with the wind" in color? i thought it was ?ooty. i think he wrote that. >> he might v. he didn't think

casa blanca was funny or clever. lastly, dads embarrassing. lori you think moms and dads would whose kids think they are cool are not doing their job. that's why i could never be a dad. i am too cool. there is another reason too, but i like to focus on that one. >> go on. now i am intrigued. you can't be a father because? >> i used to be a mountain biker. >> on the female circuit. >> skinny jeans. i am done. >> are you really? is that the only amount of stories we did? wow. look at that. coming up, our female anchors are different off camera than on. lori roth map discusses her new book without me. first, what is bill doing back in time square? hopefully being beaten to a pulp. >> would you mind reading me a passage from "50 shades of grey"? just something that is triple

x-rated. come on. it's been awhile.

do locals not know craple about the big apple? the new york post recently got uh hold of a city's cabbie exam and decided to test the quiz on so-called manhattan-ites. 71% got five or fewer answers right out of the 10 questions asked. but did the tabloid ask the right residents? probably. "red eye" decided to conduct our own quiz by hitting an area of the island where only the most native of natives congregate. feast your eyes. >> thanks, greg. i have my cab quiz, and i am in a place where only real new yorkers hang out. you probably never heard of it, time square. keep it to yourself. where are you from in new york? >> i am from utah. >> i am from australia. >> denver, colorado. >> i am a tourist from vienna.

>> france. >> this time say are you from queens. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. >> whereabouts in new york are you from? >> manhattan. >> the upper west side. >> fantastic. >> from the lower side. >> upper eastside. >> they are learning. >> i am from france. >> we are not getting, this are we? name all five burrows. >> we have manhattan, the bronks, brooklyn, queens, staten island? >> yes. that was a trick question. there are seven, manhattan, queens, bronx, brooklyn, staten staten island, philadelphia and pass saw ma squaw de. >> can i ask you a few questions about new york? >> sure. >> are you aware the guy behind you has a similar shirt on? >> no. >> what does moma stand for. >> mothers on methamphetamines. >> correct. >> modern music of art. >> close. the modern museum of awesomeness. i have my own wing.

you are more than welcome to see one of my life sized sculptures anytime you want. i will give uh free pass. you can't spell pass without ass. what is williamsburg known for? >> williamburg? i don't know. >> it is located in brooklyn, and it is known for artisnal cocaine. correct. the correct answer is -- what is the name of the island where the statue of liberty is located? don't look at my answer. >> ellis island. >> wrong, fantasy island. it is the home of a dwarf in a white suit who says da plane, da plane. >> where is central park north lore indicated? >> central park where is north? down there. up, up. >> it is actually written on the test down there. and then in parenthesises it says point. she got that right. you are three for three. are you single? yes? four for four. where is the googenheim located? >> 43rd street.

>> very close. it is located on the corner of ggog and heim street. the best new york cabbie portrayed on film? >> new york cabbie? what is a cabbie? >> yes, what is a cabbie? the 1988 film staring denzel washington and carrot p to. roosevelt island, governor's island or randal's island, which of the three islands around manhattan has residential property? roosevelt? correct. and what was roosevelt? >> the president. >> socialist. roosevelt was a socialist. help me out here. i am trying to g get a review. what is the official name of the west side highway? he is a famous yankee. >> babe ruth. >> close, try again. less fat. >> yogi bear raw. >> less worthy. >> reggie jackson. >> less not black. >> joe dimaggio. >> you got it, joe dimaggio. what is he known for? >> for being a good hitter. he married marilyn monroe jie.

exactly he hit marilyn monroe for 56 straight days. what do we know about new yorkers? they don't know anything about the big pineapple. taxi! taxi! >> bill, not only did you misrepresent every single one of your interview subjects, you didn't answer or accomplish anything. >> truly. the french girl -- i mean the girl from queens didn't give me her number. there is no such thing as a 555 number. i did not know that. >> but you got the three african-american men back to your place. >> i did. go to bed, you guys. it is way past your bedtime. i am kidding. i will be home soon. >> what are you talking about? this is on tape. you are at home in bed watching this. >> it is a game we play. they are watching. they are like, what's going? i put my arms around like, eh? we have fun. >> so fun. >> you are fun. >> are you so fun.

>> you are funker. >> no you are fun. >> are you right. >> i have nothing more to add to this travis stey. >> what? that was tbr only -- great analysis of a cogent man on the street. >> when you do comedy do you have problems with tourists not knowing anything? >> no, because i only do comedy in brooklyn. for everybody else that means i do comedy for replications of myself. everyone looks like me. when i do clubs tourists are difficult, especially if they don't understand english. >> i can see that. >> then i translate for them because i am a master of languages. >> beautiful, beautiful. rick, i don't have a question for you. >> that's okay. i want to say hello. >> i saw you on "the five" earlier. i said i want to dress like that man. >> very, very, very nice. you are wearing black jeans. >> yes. >> you are an uncool dad. >> i don't see the color in his jeans. whatever. i am racist against black

jeans. >> time to take a break. i read and respond to your e-mails. i think, maybe, who knows?

it is mail time. the address is red eye at fox news.com. you send me something to read and i will pretend to care. here you go. leading things off is edward who is into fashion. he says "your collar is too tight, and then you will be able to knot your tie." >> what is with the guys and the fashion? >> thank you, sir. it reminds me of a joke. can you tell me how a philosopher ties a tie? i think not. here is a letter from a soon to be fan, maggie. i am getting hitched and considering new york for a honeymoon. would it be possible to hang out in the studio for the taping of "red eye." it would be the first week of november. thanks, maggie, for the heads up. of course we will try to make this visit possible, but i do expect something in return.

have you seen the beginning of "brave heart" by chance? there is a custom that is introduced to the common folk. anyway, just rent the movie and call me. i forgot what it was called. anyway. here is a fan of harris faulkner. a big fan, but this is the first time i am compelled to write. i am compelled by how beautiful she is and how sexy she is on your show. the dress highlighted her beautiful body. thanks for your sexy choice and continued success, michael. if you are going to sign your name, michael, don't send the thing from your work e-mail where your real name is part of the address. you should know better. it is really, really awkward. here is another harris fan. harris is one of the hottest guests. not only beautiful, but a persona to capture your attention when she is on

camera and commenting. a loyal fan, walter. changing your name, shep to walter still doesn't work. and the picture you sent, i recognize the shorty robe. you said you lost it in the fire. i can't believe anything you say anymore. here is something from a suspicious viewer named callie with a k. "i have come to the conclusion that you and andy are dating via the matching blue tie on thursday's show" why is america so homo centric about everything because we are wearing matching ties we are dating? if you put aside the hours of relentless fruitless love making that andy and i engage in, you narrow minded types have to stop jumping to conclusion. the fact is we are so hetero we don't even notice when we are having sex with each other. >> which is why he can't be a father. >> you make me sick to my stomach. >> i try.

>> finally, a let tore lynn. i notice when you have michael ian black on, you fail to mention megan mccain is the co author of it. i'm sure it is an over sight on your part. you are wrong. we always credit the writers. we will close things out with a post game wrap up from tv's andy levy. to see clips of recent shows, go to fox news.com/red eye.

see you back here at 5:00 p.m. eastern time. coming up on the next "red eye" appearances from sherrod small, diane ma say dough and chris barron from go proud. what, no paul mccurio? time to go back to andy levy

for the post game wrap up. >> i need a clean up in here, by the way. if you can send someone down. kurt, how is bunk going? >> every friday night bunk is my comedy game show. >> excellent. it is quite fun. jay we nailed that promo. we plugged it good. >> we don't need a second take. rick, what is in your wallet? >> i am glad you asked, andy. >> you told me to. >> i wanted to show everyone a nice picture -- >> is that the french tickler? >> no. it is a heart that my daughter, summer, made for me. >> now i feel like a jerk. >> you should. >> you perverted, gross old man. >> now you feel like a jerk? >> well i had a commercial break. >> what is that white mow deer folded -- powder folded inside it? oh yes, it is a heart, officer, from my daughter. >> it is talco powder.