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the longest 4g lte battery in a razr thin profile. with 32 hours of battery life that turns an all-nighter, into a two-nighter. the droid razr maxx hd by motorola. droid-endurance. droid-powerful. westbound welcome to red eye. filling in is ktcb reporter. she's here with our pregame report. you look hidous as usual. what is coming up on tonight's show. >> nicely done. >> on tonight's red eye, we'll discuss why dressy showers are destroying america. what good is the president of the united states when you can't hang out in the cafe.

>> bill is reminded of the road not taken and gregg's description of mucus. >> it was not mucus. >> wasn't it though? >> if you are literal it is mucus. >> it is you. >> we are all mucus. >> at one point. >> she's so hot that natives sacrificed virgins over her. it is harris faulkner 7:00 eastern on fox news channel. keep laughing, harris. >> thoughtful commentary. jinga, curt loder with reason magazine and reason.comcontributor . 's so cute hello kitty dana

pireno . one much my many, many co-hosts on the 5. 5 really. get ready to have your evening ruined, america. should we frown on dressing down? young conserve tiches are gather nothing dc for something call would cpac . the future of the party is important as to what to wear for one. it is drawing attention for strong attention on pants. men recommended to wear suits and cardigans and pumps and golf shirts and caution against dressy shorts and jeans and leggings for women and t-shirts and sneakers for

nonwomen. bill. nothing about leather chappings. i am safe. >> and it is 33 percent of the people make their first impressions basod how you look. the remaining 57 percent had no standarpeds. tippy and zippy from cpac . >> they are excited about sanatorium being there. some people find the suggestions help employ. on you buy your clothing at baby gam. >> on clearance you can get amazing deals there. i am with her it is right. i think absolutely 100%. dressy shorts, i have a theory

that dressy shorts is like a prank by the fashion designer. see how many people with bad leggings - legs will wear them. if you want to have a job in politicings. you will not get wearing that at cpac. >> newt almost got the nomination until he wore the shorts. >> and harris, you wear dressy shorts to funerals. what is wrong with going casual to a conference? >> first impression is really what counts and you have to dress the way you want to be remembered. i guess dressy shorts are okay if you want to be remembered that way. one . things you considered is how walk a mile? you have to walk a mile in a

circle. we can do that in six inch heels. >> i tried it but i rarely make the money. i have been in many conferences and you do end up on your feet and back . mostly on the feet walking around. sensible shoes are very, very important, curt. the question that people are thinking about at home and probably abroad, does the guy make the conservative seem smart and cool? >> it is the party of the parents and apart no gay people . now sit up straight and eat your peas and your skirt is too short it is it a bad idea. >> that is libitarian and you don't like anybody putting limitings. you don't like anything. >> and what about the centers and traditions. if people want to dress in dressy shorts, why shouldn't they?

>> i think -- >> what if you went to a conference in youry robes? >> i wore a shorty robe to the convention in 2008 and 2009 10 and len and 12. >> there is such a thing of a too short of a shorty robe. >> where is there a robe that is short on you? >> oh. harris! >> we know what it goes to. >> said the girl in six inch heels that is six feet tall. >> what about the jeging. >> are those jewish leggings? >> no. it is the stuff that you can't wear. >> you can't wear jegings. >> i have the but for it >> it is in the trunk of your car. bill do people write you up if you are wearing pump a

tailored skirt. >> the women's wear or the cool shoes in the late 90s you would pump up? i love those pumps. call my ebay. track the button down and tasteful suit and stylish blazers and loafers and khakings. you can either have well dressed men and go none of the above. >> they were not allowed to sponsor. they could buy a ticket to attend, but not sponsor something. >> that is great news for everything in dc and bad news for cpac. >> i am kind much with curt on this in a couple of reasons why. one, republicanings and conservatives have ever since, they have been stuck in the blue blazer and khaki and

white shirt and bow tie. there is always a pocket of them because they love it and they will dress like the guy. there is nothing wrong. yes, adult men dress like kids from german fat camp. they wear long shorts and t-shirt. >> capris. >> and a sign much wealth is dressing like a slob. but t-shirts and hoodies, that is a sign of new wettle - wealth and a untethered fashion sense. >> i must be loaded. >> by the way, everybody wears a uniform. liberal conference they have back pactings and woven bracelets. >> and that's as expensive as the conservatives. but it is fake. you don't know how much it is really costing.

>> libitarian they can wear whatever they want one. >> what is the romper. >> it might look like overallos the -- there i am explain. >> rompers is what lena dunam wears on every episode of girlings. >> she's glad she's not hot. >> we'll have that story next week. >> covered thighs and a secret disguise. poor president obama wishes he could wander and explore cities uninoid and hang out at a cafe. the president lamented the loss of anomity. before the trip to the middle east which is like nebraska. does he have a fantasy he can put on a disguise and wear a musstatch. >> i have a fantasy that i can put on a disguise and wonteder

through teleavive and go to a bar and have a conversation. the toughest thing about being president. you can't just slip out and interact with people in without having a bunch of guys with machine guns with me. president obama, go hang out in embarrass. i am sorry i hang out in barrings. he doesn't. he is president and i do red eye. speaking of annoying things . >> like i said there is gay marriage and then things like this. if you could get rid of your fame and be anonymous. let's face it harris, you are the third or fourth most

famous person in the table. you love to hang occupant - hang out in the swingers loungings. >> it is interesting that the president could get lost and anonymous in israel. he hasn't spent ape lot of time. maybe that's why he could be anonymous there. >> exactly, did bush complain about not being able to wander and be a civilian and did he go in disguises as you? >> not that i know of. >> you are not sure president obama didn't. >> i was trying to think which question to answer first. every president deals with this in some way. you realize you can't just go out and fake a walk. president obama talked about how he would like to take michelle obama for a walk neighborhood. it is it a chose you make if you are the leader of the free

world. >> his entire life to be a political machine. >> nancy pelosi said he never did anything in hotdogs -- his life that is political. >> you cursed my world view. he said what did he say, this is the toughest thing of being president. >> could he be right? >> he could be right. i think it would be in israel good to wear a disguise. >> i am famous and can't go outside. >> people want to take pictures of me. >> no one is forcing you to be a star or president . >> he is president of the most powerful country in the world . so right, nice. >> bill, should a president grow a mustach. we haven't had one since grover. >> it james garfield, and it

was a mouse-- musstatch. he was the first hipster in the 1880ings. i spoke with graphicings of - graphics what the president would look like with a wig and beard and it might look something like am just messing with you. i maintain he has. if he had the right. probably gopt o.k.ess to the c.i.a. with the best disguises on planet earth. yes, it is true. he can go as another president. >> he could wear bangings oh, no. >> maybe he has. so vument - when the president is in town and i see a man

with a mouse - moustache i photobomb him. in atlanta, a guy spinning records amazing. we went up to his -- jimmy carter. it was a 24 year old. >> you should hope that the secret service knows what photobomb means. >> nais a peaceful way of doing this. >> we have to move on to my favorite story of all time. from kenyan born to an odd horn. is there no class in artificial gas. michigan first grader was barred from the talent show because his performance deemed inappropriate. he was excited to feign flagellant sounds until the principal backed by the

superintendent got wise and axed the act. >> body farts. he can arm pit fart and leg fart and neck fart and ear fart. it is good. >> why wasn't this our lead. >> she 'the happiest mom ever. no one else understood his art. let the dejected boy and mom elaborate on the atrocity. >> they say it is too inappropriate. i am not allowed to go on the talent show. >> what does it say to him. >> not to be herself. >> i don't agree with her decision and i have hundreds and hundreds of people that stand behind the way i think. >> i could buy that poor boy a fart machine. >> there a mishap with his partner.

>> why don't you put him up and let him play a bit. >> he is a cute little critter. >> what in the world that. [laughing] >> i don't care if that was stanged. it amazing . -- it amazing. i don't care. we need extra time to discuss both of theels storp stores at length. >> it was in slow motion. >> where is peta right now. >> woah. that a little midget in a hawkume. you are a libriitarian. is this an attack on the first amendment? >> is it a public school?

did he learn this in school. there is so much we don't know. >> looks on to me like the mom taught him. >> blame the mother. >> it is it causing humor and they are 7 years old. at least he is not wearing dress shortings. >> they are not allowed to do fart things even though some people try at work to like entertain people. >> you are referring to somebody specifically. >> harris, the school too sensitive or not enough. >> too sensitive and i have a six year old and she does wild things. >> you also have children. go ahead. >> don't get me arrest show. my point is, as a mom, i can understand our glee, we get excited when our kids do anything. as long as they are not

hurting themselves . they are fake farts. i can't believe i said it on the fox network. they don't smell and not like they are offending . my three year old is hilarous. >> bill, this is a magic trick, when you discover is like a super power. it first happens to you. you go and you have to show it to everybody. it is like it spreads like the flu. >> there are other powers that you learn out there that you realize are a super power but don't show anyone. they are at the talent show. that's why i am telling you, they are preparing him for the future. >> the principal not only killed this kid's self-worth, he kill would the audience chance at all to be entertained. talent shows were girms had

the thing like madonna. you know you did that. there is that one kid with a twinkle, twinkle and a killed with the fedora and he tries his stuff at stand up. bring the fart kid. >> i think this is the new red eye cause. >> he will be on celebrity apprentice. they will take anybody. >> coming up, do arsonist ever lose the urge? >> dana talks about the book. >> and space kitten. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 seems like etfs are everywhere these days. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 but there is one source with a wealth of etf knowledge tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 all in one place. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 introducing schwab etf onesource™. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 it's one source with the most commission-free etfs. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550

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>> it helpings with sleeping and a new study found that sleep apeds known as ambian makes you sharper the next day by improving the brain's ability to consolidate memory. the prescription drug increases sleep sprindles that are brain activity to move information from short term to long term memory. look at the video now, shall we. >> him and his wife have a separate bed. dana, you pop ambian, is the memory stuff true? >> what? >> that is a classic? >> that is a good one if i say

so myself. i don't know. i don't know anything about ambian. >> you doy no. >> i can't sleep. i haven't had memory problems yet. i have a very good memory and it is a bless curse. i remember everything they say and when they said it and the tone they said it and i can remember everything and good for some things but not good for something. i don't know about ambian. >> that's what i do for my husband. i see him walking around and tries to pretend he's not looking for something and i will give him a minute, what are you looking for. sunglasses. table bottom right corner and 99 percent of the time i am right. it hasn'ted me. >> you take ambian . took you two minute to get there to say yes. >> i enjoyed the journey. >> one of those side affect

accident. >> harris? >> the study in journal of snuro scientist. the mechimism meaning the drug. you are not laying down. you are making memories because ambian makes you sleep walk. >> for some people or eat a packet of double stuffed oreo that a columnist woman wrote about. >> can you junk them in your sleep. >> you can do a lot of interesting thing on ambian. sometimes on the plane sorry the johnson family from kansas. curt you buy this? >> i am happy a national past time is endorsed here. i don't use ambian. great. it is for the memory. whatever. >> who paid for the study? >> i should have read it. >> does it make you sleep walk. >> the cookies.

it makes you eat cookies. >> i read that. >> bill, i find that you read stuff more clearly if you bash a hammer in your head. have you tried that. >> you told me to try that but it is not working and hard on the make up artist. >> i have a horrible memory and i can't do ambian because i will find myself at 3:00 in the morning empty nonexistent coffee grinds and in the hallway porky pigging it. that is when you are wearing shirt and no pants. and some areas . world it is donald duck. but in the east coast porky pigging . so if you add ambian to that mixture i do that and commit mass murder. >> i think anybody committed

mass murder. >> not porking picking. i am sure there will be a case coming up. >> i hope not. the laying down memories just to take it serious for a second. >> no. >> it is actually true for family members suffering from althiemers and dementia wouldn't it be interesting if it helped to infuse memory. from what i am reading they need to do more study. >> i always say this. every time we talk about drugs, the pharmesutical industry is our modern space program. there is plannests called pills and we don't know what they do. we are scared of them being illegal or dangerous. study them. if they work. what a boon it would be. a lot of people didn't know take something like viagra a blood pressure pill and a side

affect . they found that out . ambian a blood pressure. >> and the eye lash thing. there is it a spanow. you can buy a product that you put on your eye lid and eye lashes grow. they were helping cancer patients that lost their hair in the treatment and it is it a major selling product. >> that is the opposite of what i was talking about. dying of cancer and we found out how to grow your eye lashes. i would say yes. you are taking something that you are mild and saving people's livings. >> it is cosmeticings. >> it is recount the entire moment. >> i will never forget the image of me with a shirt and nothing else. >> i only have a good memory. >> wait a second. you don't need much much an

imagination actually. >> ladies and gentlemen. all right. you have a comment on this show. e-mail us at redeyenews.com. you have an animal doing something interesting like a hawk. we'll see that again and we are asking lauren if it is real or fake. i think she knows the difference between real and fake. wink. fox news.com/redeye. click on submit a video. >> this is sponsored by horse drawn carriage and designed for comfort and elgrance and pull would by a horse. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 like no atm fees, worldwide. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550 and no nuisance fees. tdd#: 1-800-345-2550

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to help relieve your pain and stop further joint damage. oh. let's go. from the crack, off the backboard. [ laughs ] dad! [ laughs ] whoo! oh! you're up! oh! oh! so close! now where were we? ok, this one's good for two. score! [ male announcer ] share what you love with who you love.

kellogg's frosted flakes. they're gr-r-eat! j>> we are back. we will go to lauren now. >> higregg. >> how are you doing? >> fantastic. >> it is. >> it is. i can go away now. >> let's start off with cpac and the new dress code they put out there. dana, you say the dressy shorts are an abomination and a horrible idea and if you wear them you will not get hired, correct? >> for a job in politicings.

>> aha. >> good point. >> what job are you referring tompt >> i got many jobs for dressy shorts. sometime you want to put the message out there, i had a horrible childhood. that is the job you are going for. >> you don't have to talk when you walk in the night club. >> curt, you thought it a bad idea because you are cutting out an entire segment . population that should be included. my question is, what did you wear for your first job as mtv corsphondant. >> i am nomit sure i wore anything. it all cameras. >> translation porky pigment. >> it was something fru-fru. i don't know exactly. >> gregg, you thought it was a

bad idea. you think maybe if they relaxment dress code it would be okay to wear dressy shortings. >> i wear everything they wear ironically. it is important not to try to be hip but it is nice to let people the way they want to dress . make people feel comfortable. you have to fight the stereo types that are there . a lot of the stereo types are artificial and some are real. >> last time you went to cpac you wore a novelty shirt. >> i had a lot of pictures. >> you are so disaaffected. >> allow me to just remind you when i am on red eye, i made the mistake of wearing pants and i got death threats.

>> i apologize for that. >> it is not a rule but a suggestion. >> i very threatening suggestion. >> it is the culture. >> next time i am bringing -- >> someone left a pitch on our doorstep. i think it kilmeade. >> and obama's moustache. gregg, you said why does he want to hang out in bars and you hang out in bars and that is why you are not president. is that why you are not president, the only reason? >> there incident in 1996 that involve would 37 people and you can order the movie still on line. >> interesting to know. curt, you said that -- i am not done. >> it is good job. >> funny. >> woe is me, the president

can't be incognito. >> it is it like a rock star thing . it is it a paparrazi. these people. >> it sounds like it came from somewhere personal. >> it came from no where personal. i have no personal and doesn't relate to me at all. >> when you are off camera. >> it is just whining. >> he is dead inside. i am going to throw that out there. fart noises, the first grader not allowed to make fart noises. dana, you said it is good to prevent him from perform preparing him from the future. >> crush his spirit early. >> what if its -- his talent lands him on the x-factor. >> america's got talent. >> that is an impasse.

this is a debate. >> didn't have back up for that one, did you lauren. >> understanding we are eventually going to run out of dance troupe and singers maybe shake it up with a fart noise. >> you were just saying, they have to do more than just say. you have to bring factings. un real. >> have you worked in this news room. >> no, i don't go down there. >> clearly. facts are not part of his job description. harris, you say that fake farts are hilarous. >> i said when your children do things as a parent, you find them infectous and they are funny when it comes from the little onings. >> what if it is real farts and you have serious gastric problem. >> not the stinkies. i lich with a three and six years old. not the stinkies but fake one.

>> fake for the talent show. >> don't get ited. >> harris, i thought a stinky is what they kept in the big garbage pail in the er. >> it is a real farpt. >> that's why they call the show stink eye. >> here's my question, why is the artificial flagulence snow condemn would and teaching your kid to whistle is somehow to be admired. >> it is annoying. >> but it doesn't smell. >> neither does fake flagigence. >> you are not imitating a bodily function that is considered crude in public. >> people who whistle are fake. >> there is different kinds of whistling. >> where are you whistling from. >> we whistle when they are.

>> can you say that. i can't make a short joke. >> people whist toll let you know they are present. >> that is absent minded whistling is the worst kind. stand nothing line in chipotle and it is annoying. >> that is it a person trying to let you know they are there. >> i find it absent minded. >> i do that sometimings. >> i do it because of a bird. >> you are a bird. >> he does the stinky whistling. >> i like to be whistle wouldalt. >> who doesn't? >> see i am happy. >> lauren. >> moving along. >> sorry about that. ambian something that i am a huge fan of. >> really? >> dana, you say that you have absolutely no memory problems yet you don't want to talk about ambian and that is the reason for your stellar

memory, right? >> no, taking ambian has not hurt my memory which is always very good. i don't know, i would be like the control group for a study like this. >> it is helping your perhaps? >> it might be and i will continue to speak well >> you brought up a liberal who ate a lot of cookies on ambrian. >> i can top that. i shop on line a lot and don't recall it. this two days a purchase while on ambrian. a 11 pound block of cheese. >> in is absolutely true. >> i am hiding my face for obvious reasons and decided to order it on line. maybe i was planning a party that i would remember in the future. >> lauren, what you have to do, you have to have the computer in another room. >> yes,. >> shut it down. >> and turn out the light and

go to bed. >> sometimes walking around porky pigging it and looking for your laptop. >> or donald ducking it. >> wait a second i want to play. >> they tell me they have to go. >> that's all, guyings. >> can we watch. i want to ask lauren if she thinking it is real or not. let's play the hawk. >> put him up and let him play a bit. >> there we g. >> okay. >> he is a cute little critter. >> he is a cute little critter. >> no mothat. >> no way if is real. >> that is totally real. >> what in the world that. someone would curse if that. that totally planned and that's how they feed their hawk and they made it like it a that.

>> it was a critter. >> and the kid in on it, too. >> i think it a hate crime. i think it a hate crime. >> lauren? >> see you all later. >> coming up. this next story we'll celebrate steak. is that salsbury steak i ever had. me a letter in blood. but who should be the next host of the jeopardy . that way worse. 's the business n with premium service like one of the best on-time delivery records and a low claims ratio, we do whatever it takes to make your business our business. od. helping the world keep promises.

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but when his contracts pays him 1,000 annually. it would be more like twompt and anderson cooper is discussed in lightning round. lightning round. >> dana, as a former contestant do you think lauer would be a good contestant. >> you have a picture of how i did on that. harris, you could do better. i in heels and hakim jabull debar. i introduced him from fox news.comand he said i am sitting down . first of all. it is ridiculous to talk about who is president in 2016. this whole thing wouldn't happen in 2016. it is somebody in the media let's screw with matt lauer

and put it out that he's considered for jeopardy. >> that's what i did. >> monster. >> fussy headed freak. >> i think john ohurley would be great. >> i am glad you don't know him. >> she is saying it because it is st. patrick's day. it is it a lovely one. >> curt you think they should think of carrot top. >> get christian amanpour. i didn't know anderson cooper and meredith viera had game shows. >> yes anderson cooper a mole. you have to guess which mole. >> and the shape they were in. >> that is great. >> great show. >> and you would win a four million home. >> and the loser had to connect the dots. >> now you are dreaming.

>> harris, you think a woman would make a better choice? >> for anything. you meaningmean something specific. >> i can think of one. >> you know, i always wondered what attributes do you need to have to be a game show host. unemployed. does that mean matt will be unemployed. >> i love game shows. i love them so much. i like to be a contestants on themp. i want to do the family feud and price is right. $25,000 pyramids and index for inflation would be a $100,000. this is great . i watch it every night. >> i am nominating you and me to be in the amazing race. you may become german? we'll take a break and when we come back, more stuff. go to amazon.com. [ male announcer ] ah... retirement. sit back, relax,

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>> colorado woman said her children's school is interferring by not letting her kids wear bratz-shirt. i steal and please watch me .

the principal said they would not support something that was demeaning to the kid. is that the point? >> let the parents be the parents. i mean my mom wanted to take us to school and my sister hadn't finished the cereal and she said come on . she had put it on her head and my sister had to wear it all day. she never did it again. >> retroactively arrested for child abuse. >> kids have a short attention span. by half of the day is over they can't remember they are in trouble. remind them while they are in trouble. >> it is like teasing. shame strangers but not your family. >> you are not raising strangers. >> you don't know that, harris. >> you think it is good. >> i would not do it to my

children and that is cool and disturbing part of the story, she's concerned about her children winding up in er care. i would love to hear my mom saying that. >> bill, you would wear them for fun. >> it is you're welcome. >> parents understand what a good punishment is. when you suspend them from a day off of school. that kid puts that t-shirt on. he steals and that is a bad ass. that kid loved it. i stealing, pretty awesome. she got more popular and no wonder she didn't turn around. >> cereal on the heads for school. >> never forgot. >> didn't affect her one ion the a. >> dana's more famous sister. we are closing things up. equally nice. i know her sister.

fox news.com/red eye. [ birds chirping ]

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