[ laughter ] >> bret: remember, it's mother's day sunday. thanks for inviting us into your home tonight. that's it for "sp welcome to "red eye." it is like game of throwns if by throwns you mean need parcizzi. what is coming up on tonight's show? and don't mail it in. >> coming up on the big show, an adulterer and the sister of a comedy show host squareoff. sadly only one of them loses. and does carrying your guitar make a man look sexier? i can assure you that sadly the answer is yes. and who is the most trusted person in america? sadly it is a guy who pretends to be other people for a living. greg? >> andy, you are andy levy. you don't have to preface anything with sadly. >> i thought it was nice the way i used sadly all three times. >> but you don't have to

because you are andy levy. everything is sadly. >> i don't follow. >> why should you? go away. let's welcome our guests. well she is so cute that care bears but jedediah bila stickers on their notebooks. i am here with fox news contributor jedediah bila. she has a lot of vowels in her name. and he is smarter than a wise elephant stuffed into an owl, patrick millsap. and in peru he is considered bean dip. it is my repulsive sidekick, bill schulz. and if insightful commentary was a pair of dumbbells i would pump him in front of a mirror with my shirt off, michael moynihan. >> a block. the lede. that's the first story. hey, here is an idea. don't suck for once. >> wow. >> he was nice for a week. he was nice and then he changed his mind.

all right, disembodied voice. voters didn't care about the affair. there is life after cheating on your wife. mark sanford has won his old congressional seat in a place called south carolina four years after a scandal torpedoed his particular career -- or his political career or par particular career. w40* is listening to me anyways at 3:00 in the morning. he won in a district that has not elected a dem in three decades. that's more than 30 years, jedediah. shut up. his come back could not be more come bac ky er. he told his staff he was hiking the appalachian trail. it may have been a euphemism. he then said he was with his mistress in argentina. a lady he is now engaged to. good for him. sanford later paid a $70,000 ethics fine for using public money to fly for personal

reasons. political analysts say voters stuck with sanford much like this baby duck sticks with his cat. what did i say, bill? gay marriage. >> it is great. >> no, no. this is what happens. >> that is better than a cat and a cat. >> first you have gay marriage and now you have cats and ducks together. i told you this would happen, america. i told you. >> it is a new america. a better america. >> it is a slippery slope especially with a duck. patrick, how is this come back imaginable? his scandal made global news. he was a punch line for about, i don't know, a month. was it because he is running in a republican district, or

did he have no challenger? >> i have no idea. let's first congratulate -- >> key can -- we can fix that. >> anthony wiener is very excited now. and who knew we would have a chance for john eldrige versus arnold schwarzenegger in 2016. the republicans keep the seat, but marriage lost a little today. we keep putting these guys up -- i mean on the conservative side, when he won the primary there was arguments like well at least his wife didn't have cancer. when you are starting to compare whose affair was worse, you have problems. >> that's true, jedediah. would you have voted for him? >> oh gosh. he was not the ideal candidate. the bottom line was his opponent was a bad candidate. she didn't do the meet and greet. she didn't sit and talk to voters. she didn't go on the stoop and shake people's hand and say i understand your needs. she was a bad candidate.

she would assume sanford would have character issues that would take him down so she wouldn't have to do the retail politics. as a result she said we don't have to do this work. she should have realized this is a stropping gop district and -- a strong gop district and people may look at policy more than character in a race like this. >> i don't think this is the same as wiener. during wiener's scandal he writhed and tried to get out of it. he trashed people and smeared -- >> because this guy just gave into the scandal so quickly? >> but he also sent pictures of his dong to random people on twitter? mark sanford fell in love with a lady. he is married and has kids and the rest of it. i really hope my swipe not watching. i don't want to dismiss it like, it is fine. it is okay because he fell in love and it was sweet and everything. she was there on the election night. it is different than wiener because wiener is a [bleep].

>> it is like maybe there is a way that you can get through a scandal correctly, and he figured it out. man, i didn't see this one coming. bill, are there just not enough politicians? we keep reusing the old ones. >> the ones that think about getting into politics have not gotten caught yet. these guys say, well, might as well stick around. i will stay here and they have to vote on me. this guy could have cutoff the head of a bum and held it up to the camera and said this guy will be my senior aid. they would have been it is a heavily republican county and we will vote anyway. >> it was four years ago and it seems like a longtime. to put it into perspective, bill, you will be dead this three. >> my mom is watching. i don't know about your wife. >> your mom stopped watching after the drool incident.

in fact, america stopped. by the way, that was our best ratings of like forever. >> you're welcome. >> america needs to see what comes out of your mouth. >> america likes my fluids. >> this goes back to my one point, michael, maybe i could -- i never thought i could run for anything. given my past, but maybe i am wrong. >> that used to be the thing. i can't join the cia and i can't be president. all of those things i did in my senior year in albania. no -- it is a horrible job to be a politician. that's why it is heavily populated by horrible people. who wants that job? you gave wiener a -- sanford a pass and weaner is a [bleep], but the fact of the matter is not only was he caught, but he lied about it. >> and it was a weird lie. >> appalachian trail? two things that outraged

everyone during this was that there was a politician who lied and was misusing taxpayer dollars. >> he said he was a guy that slept on a cot in his office and was so fiscally responsible. >> ya, with the argentine yen woman. >> there is a lot of kids that will not go to the appalachian trail because it has been sheared by infidelity. i won't hike there. >> here is the good news. most on the appalachian trail don't don't know what be smir of means. >> why do you have t.o. smear an entire -- why do you have to smear an entire group of people? >> let's not over look everything here. as creepy and awful as wiener was, he didn't hide behind relimbing general. the fact of the matter -- he didn't hide behind religion. i understand forgiving in christianity. he would quote his minister and name drop god like he was

at a hollywood party and talking about, i don't know, scorsese. he would do that at every turn to shield what he did. he admitted what he did was wrong. he sought forgiveness. that's great. to keep talking about god. that is scum me. >> i don't have any interest in this guy. he said in his victory speech, god raised me above this. >> wait a second i have to say, maybe he believes it. that's what religion gives you. maybe he actually sincerely believes in second chances which you are taught in religion, forgiveness and trying to be a better person ssments look, there are a lot of atheists who drive me crazy because they won't shut up either. from winning a suite to a really weird tweet. hearings featured whistle-blowers featuring the owe bough you ma administration's response to

the terrorist assault. they lead us to the real story, their watergate. in the middle of the hearings, the paper that broke the watergate scandal tweeted, who is tweeting about benghazi? rich middle aged lovers. the twitter analytics company called demographics pro. interestingly they left out other tid-bits about the tweeters including people in this group work as author slash writers. the group has a high concentration of members of the military. definitely morrell vent to mention the -- more relevant the fast-food joint. you know what i would like to focus on? this. see, it is getting worse.

now there are more cats. now it is polygamy and inter species whatever. >> thank you whoever you are. moynihan -- >> that's not my name. you were shaken up by the cat scene. >> i smell a new porn. i would invest. >> that's andy's sunday. do you think it is a post decision to mention chick fillet and the membership was arbitrary? >> yes. i don't know why they did that. besides it is the shocking news that a story that is making the administration look bad is being touted by people on the other side. it is a shocking bit of news. the one tiny thing i will come to the defense on one thing. the people who run the twitter accounts at like newspapers and magazines tend to be the lowest person on the todum

pole. it is a excuse and a nonstory. they say people care about benghazi are republicans is what thisy are saying. they shop at wal-mart. >> they do the shorthand stuff and red neck people who hate gays basically is what they say. speaking of, jedediah, i was speaking of you. were they just trying to get the focus off their hero, obama who deserves impeachment? >> what you said was interesting. you are running a major publication. if you put people at the lowest level todum pole they have a potential of firing your legislation. that's why you don't run the "red eye" feed. >> there is a "red eye"eed? i have to go to these meetings. >> this was ridiculous. this was an effort to stigma ties this small segment of the population. i was happy to see people all

over, all sides of the political spectrum tweeting about it. people who weren't concerned heard the testimony and woke up and said something is going on. we need to hold hillary clinton accountable. not only do i think it is stupid, but it is wrong. >> what do you think, patrick? was it an attempt to say nothing to see here, america, move along? >> if the washington post had exhibited this in 1973 nixon would have been a two-term president. that's the same for the mainstream media. we are doing exactly what they wanted. i don't give it to the lower level. we were proving all of the people that have kept this story alive and there is a real story there. the testimony was riveting. it has made hillary clinton be a liar. it shows that obama has no foreign policy, and they tried

to find -- they mentioned chick fillet. physical -- chick-fil-a. if you have never had chick-fil-a, i mean, it is the food of the gods. >> demographics are for those who use the hash tag bill schulz. they share a couple things in common, they live in alleys and collect twine. >> that is a terrible thing to say about the head of the amtrak pr, bill schulz. i happened to get the twitter name first. i apologize, sir. that was scurlous. >> you don't even know what scurlous means. >> it is the same as besmirch. from benghazi to been purring. they tried to turn housecats into. spies. popular science magazine shows operation uh could acoustic kitty aimed to turn a fur ball

into a feline by, quote, implanting a microphone in her ear and small radio trans mater. transmitter and weaving the antenna into her white fur. the cats are not interested in ease see yen thonl. the cat was tasked with capturing the on the conversation of two men. but it got board and went into the street and was run over by a taxi. soon after the program was abandoned, the cia that has tried to turn canines into spies. helping them blend into surroundings. i have woo very some tape. >> adorable, but disturbing because we have no idea what that poor dog is doing.

>> he was in a little globe. >> that was scourlous. >> jedediah, we have better technology. should we reopen the cats by program? >> much like me they love distraction. i am surprised they can choose a cat. >> they don't like to pay attention. a taxicab or a bright light flashes and they stair at it like i do. it makes them a bad can't debt. >> i saw "the born identity" and" the born supremacy" and a cat is better than matt damon. >> matt damon -- cat damon would be the successor. >> that would be amazing. mike is this further proof that cats can't be trusted considering she hates all animals ? >> can i say it is maybe evidence that the cia can't be trusted? i love the description of

this. it is not a bad idea if you don't think about it too much. they said they put this thing on its ear and wires down. just send it in to kgb headquarters. >> it means everyone on the stage are a bit soft. >> don't they think somebody will want to search the cat for a fire? for a wire. come out of that vittles. >> that's what they eat. >> tender vittles. >> we have those in george journal. >> cats have great lives, but with great lives come great responsibility. isn't it time they pay back america for living off us? >> can i yield my time to bill for the uh blib tore reference to the bond girl in this. >> i didn't even think of that. even though that's her name and it is on tbs, i feel

uncomfortable saying her name in that james bond movie. >> patrick, so you don't want to respond to this? >> no, unfor the fatly don't you think somebody in the cia in the 60s saw the bond movie where the -- where they are painting the cat? that's what we are going to do now. >> exactly. that's how it happened. animals don't do enough for us. if we don't eat you, you should help us. >> i agree. what other purpose does a cat serve? what do they do? half the time they won't let you pet them, so therefore they could have bugs all over them. we can never touch them. we have used dolphins and horses. if he wants a sequel, maybe it

happen and use cgi because you can't train cats. >> and they shrinking kids. >> ghost busters that help people find ghosts and the et guy on the bicycle that helped fight world war ii. >> or in pandora where they murder the blue people? >> that was awesome. >> that was in the 50s. >> that segment should win a pull pulitzer. coming up, what is something in common. people who inspire me. first, can carrying a guitar case help you win a date? maybe, i just used mine to transport my collection of doll heads.

well women hop into bed if they think you can shred? a new study claims just carrying a guitar increases your chances of getting a date by a third. what is a third? researcher tees university of south brit -- researchers at the university of south britney, go gocanker -- go canker sores. the first part of the test he was wearing a sports bag and then the tbaw tar case. when he carried the guitar case 31% gave him his number compared to 14% with nothing. and 9% when he carried a sports bag. flute players continue to be ignored by women. sorry, flute players. >> who wrote that? >> you know what, that was

their actual wedding night. jedediah, what is it about guitars? do you agree with this study or disagree? >> it is true for me. i love my musicians, edgy, sexy, but i need to hear you. >> you go to the lilith fair a lot, don't you? >> i knew that would rear its ugly head. i think musicians are known to be edgy and sexy and mysterious. starving artists fit into that group as well. >> she is bringing up a point. she is describing something she perceives as cool. when did cool become a thing? why is she saying a guy with a guitar is cool. what did they do before there was a guitar? >> maybe he was just -- maybe he was -- who is a guy that works on shoes ? >> a cob -- cobler? >> maybe being a cobler is

cool. >> i think in brooklyn being a cobler is cool. they make your feed bleak. >> you know it is great to be an artesian repairman. can i tell you about the study. it is 31% of women -- 31% of french women because this was done in south britney which is a fake university. >> they like johnny hallady. some kids in france will no that reference. >> isn't the real winner the dude paid to hit on women. >> the most interesting part they didn't publish which is if you have a van it is 61% and motorcycle 1 10%. the only ipg thing you should do with a guy playing a guitar and you should rip it out of his hand and brake it on the

wall. >> that was the reaction to the beta male cool that started in the late 60s. if you were an army veteran it was cool. bough lieu she saw that and said that's not how it works. bill, instead of guitar, you carry sars. >> i don't know how i contracted that. >> i think you got it from a guitar. >> it is very five years ago, but i just got it. i am not a musician and i am not a starving artist, but i am starving. just throwing that out there. i haven't eaten in days, and i am single lady in red. >> when was the turning point when it happened this when all of a sudden it is like -- what did people think. think -- it is like when you listen to children's music when you were a kid and you hear a pop song.

you forgot you listened to children's music and now you are listening to -- i don't know. >> this is a brooklyn thing where there are songs that are real cool. this is children's music the parents can listen to. >> i didn't know there are so many babies this my neighborhood who love the ramones. >> how do babies love the ramones. >> you want to punch the babies? >> some. >> oh my gosh. >> one baby is a [bleep] who is super pre pretentious. >> in all fairness we want to punch those locally grown. "red eye" does not confirm the punching of babies. i don't care what he does. all babies are artisian. do you have a common on the

show? what is happening. red eye at fox news.com. go to fox knew -- dash to fox news.com/. >> tonight's half time report is sponsored by surfing. riding on the crest or wave and standing on a surfboard. thanks, surfing.

let's see if we have anything wrong so far. what's up, andy? >> not much. >> always a good morning. >> one of my favorite morning. >> i said that. you can't spell thursday without u. >> okay. sanford wins his seat back. patrick, i like how your answer to how this happened was i have no idea. it is refreshing. >> nobody was paying attention to this election. >> i don't know. i think a lot of people were paying attention to it. >> comedy central. >> exactly. i do agree with greg. i don't think anthony wiener should look at this as a good sign. the sanford thing was further removed. it was four years ago. wiener has a presumptive front runner in the race. i don't think it could

translate for her. >> i will disdwre with you. i will disagree with you. >> fair enough. >> i was thinking about spy cats. back off. >> greg, if you could every 30 seconds say that it will make it better. >> i know where this is going. >> colbert-bush, you said was a bad candidate. do you think having a famous brother would be enough? >> i just think she wasn't good enough. of campaigning and getting out and shaking hands with people and doing the door-to-door stuff that politicians who are veteran get and that's how you are elected. this dpie is involved in a scandal and i am going to look good and the better apings which didn't work that way. >> i suspect part was she thought my brother is so popular that that is really, really going to help me. i wonder how pop lore her brother is in -- popular her

brother is in south carolina? >> i don't know. but in south carolina particularly. maybe she thought that would help. she said people will see me as a better option because his character is messed up. which it is. but you need to argue your principals. >> i agree with you. he is marying the woman he had an affair with. that's better than randomly cheating on your wife. >> yes. somebody wrote a good piece and i have to credit them. all of these scandals and men disappeared. only one of his fallout through recent times. he excited on his wife and has like four kids with. i should not maybe say he is a great guy. >> but i do still think there is a difference of having an affair with someone and a fling. >> he will start cheating on her though. >> that's what happens. >> rachel's mom said about

ross, once a cheater x always a cheater. >> they were on a break. >> i i am not going to start this argument again. >> they were on a break. >> they were not on a break. >> what part of let's take some time and figure this out are you not getting. >> reporter: -- >> bill, correct, they were on a break. >> what are you guys talking about? >> what are you talking about, you insensitive pig. >> some sort of elf reference or something? >> greg, you said you used to think you couldn't run for office because of your past. you still can't? >> i can't? >> no. >> you don't even know. >> i know enough, my friend. >> i can never wash the blood off my hands. >> and it is not a metaphor. >> bill, you went after

stanford for quoting the minister and quoting the bible. >> yes. >> it worked. i didn't say it didn't work. i said i besmerched it. i think it reflects a lot of shame and that is the last. >> keep correcting you. >> shadinfroida. >> shadinfroida. >> sorry. >> i didn't want you to come out here night after night and humiliate yourself. you are using a german word. >> did it make you feel good to correct him? >> yes, but a little fast. >> washington post, benghazi tweet, you .ed out those who run the twitter are at the

lowest end on the totum pole. somebody can be in the organization. the reason the person tweeted that was because the post did a piece on that am lit cal blog. it was not a tweet that had no link to what somebody was riding about. >> this is a dice ropings of newspapers of we are tweeting about a blog entry they were doing life. >> and the other important thing is a lot of people thought that the washington post had just created this headline. the headline had been moltedded and -- molded and shaped by other people eats -- people's analysis. that's where they basically trashed everybody was interested. they called them truthers and stupid. 234* a way all they did was -- it was reverse blogging and they took the point of view of a blog.

even i got board. >> wow. usually this happens when andy talks. guy -- >> by the way, one of the ways they describe him is as rich. is that rich? >> that's super rich. >> i don't think that could be described as rich. >> within the top 20% of twitter. >> that's not rich. >> they were playing with numbers. >> they also said they were overwhelmingly white, but who is on twitter? >> i don't know. >> liberals are -- rich in middle class is used for undye 9ed -- un-- there are serious rich liberals. trust me. >> i am skipping this one. i thought you were going to

let me get away with it. >> why don't you want to talk about it? >> was it too close to home. >> you mentioned we are capturing two men on a park bench. you must be relieved to find out that failed. that was a fairly he heated conversation. yesterday do dye yaw, i am with you. why not use a dog? >> cats are too smart for this kind of stuff to be man slated like that. you want to manipulate and you get your dog. you get your slipperspers and you need a dog. >> why not then just use a western? -- use a person. the whole toint of using a cat is to use the cat. find somebody that will speak to you. >> let me move on.

you pointed out that this happened in the 60s and inspired by the movies like the james bond movies where the guy had a cat in his lap. i think somebody fro the cia was dipping into the project. that's what i think is going on there. apparently i am out of time. >> are you really? >> thanks for your long boring ass stories. >> i don't even remember what it was about. >> no one here said that either. >> it was about cats. i can't remember. that's scary. i can't even remember what happened in this show two minutes ago. you know what it is? my brain is a sink that doesn't have a stopper. all of the thoughts go through. >> which show is this again? >> i think it is "the five" oh one more thing is coming up. i have a good one. >> the best things in life are free and now that i discovered

what you mean to me, and i am forwarding these to hr, lou. trust me. and medical medical marijuana for pets. yes, [inaudible]

should a sick chiuaua be gefn marijuana -- given marijuana? a california veterinarian is recommending pot for sick pets, especially at the end of their lives. dr. doug kramer says his medical weed has the same therapeutic affect on ailing animals as it does on people alleviating chronic pain and stimulating appetite. he has given it to his cancer-stricken husky to prove it works. got the dog high. kramer described the affect on his pooch saying the first

dosage she was around and increasing the quality of life. peta is cool with it albeit with one cough vee jot. cough vee yacht. people blowing smoke in a dog's face to get him high or the cat drunk. that is something one has to guard against. let's look at our first test patient, shall we? >> this is a problem. this is the problem. >> that's a solution. >> we have been talking about spy cats. high dogs, moynihan. how can you talk down a paranoid dog? a dog with a bad trip you

can't help. >> what a segment this is. >> you have lost america. >> i thought this was great. first this was done by a fine journalistic organization. >> and mother jones. i don't know what that means. >> get to your response. >> i will say i heard peta in the news twice this weekend. one was about chris christie killing a spider and this was how you shouldn't blow pot smoke into a dog's face. they are a great organization. everyone should start giving money to them. >> jedediah, can you give me a better chains. better answer? >> no. the bar is really low. >> i support it and if she got sick or would be in pain i would want her to feel. >> people who don't have pets can't have a an opinion. >> she is using the pert as an

excuse. but i will tell you i had a friend who smoked a ton of pot and she blew smoke into the dog's face. >> really, was yo are friend thedadiah-thela? >> that sounds a lot leak jedediah bila. patrick, are you in favor of legalizing marijuana for humans and if so why not animals? >> that is a double-edged question. >> i question whether it was an interview or the hidden tape recorder in the doctor's office. i do think this is a conspiracy because dog munchies, they bill make a killing on this. >> you will have fat, lazy pets who won't do anything but watch tv. >> they won't even fetch. >> they will fetch and wrem. and the pot is so strong what do you do with these animals?

i don't think that's true. >> it is very strew. >> his pot is stroppinger now. stronger now. >> well, some of it. >> i think reason magazine wrote a piece about this and it is not true. >> you have added nothing to this segment. >> this is a nothing segment. >> last word to bill and make sure it is an insult directed at moynihan. >> you suck. secondly, the story is not medical marijuana. the story is the extent every american will go to to keep their poor disease-ridden dog alive. instead of 86ing these little guys they will do to any -- they will lose their legs and they will supply them with marijuana goodies so they won't do the chemo is much.

the four blind are staying around alive because he can't deal with his own mortality. wake up. put these things out of their misery and move on. >> that was beautiful. >> do you realize bill made the most salient? >> i hate you now, jedediah. >> half of america hits bill. i hate bill. time to take -- bill hates bill. i love me. >> no, you don't. i like bill schulz from amtrak. >> more stuff is on the way. the joy of hate, look at that. an autographed copy get it at g gutfeld.com or buy it on amazon. not the forest, but the website. you couldn't buy books, or could you? wow.

according to reader's digest, my favorite digest, tom hanks is the most trusted man in the country. i believe he is a singer. actors fared better than most other public figures. hanks and sandra bullock and

de denzel and all scoring over 50%. most americanss trust judge judy which is more n than any other judge. jedediah, why is it so easy to trust somebody on tv who is make believe other than somebody like you who is hot. >> well we are on tv, but they may trust me. i think with celeb bra -- celebrities we feel reno them. somebody like judge judy we feel like she is in our living room. >> she is not? i dressed up like a mannequin judge judy. you are a lawyer. surprised judge judy is more well known? >> probably not. the other people couldn't name the supreme court judges.

that's what this poll shows. we are becoming escapists it is easier to talk about people who have to make decisions other than what spript to do. i don't think anybody on this poll could name the supreme court justices. >> what you are saying is escapist is a polite word for stupid? >> that was besmirc he d. >> it would be interesting. mike, i will give you an opportunity to -- to redeem myself. >> a salient-point. >> a salient pot. americans are just idiots. what does it mean if you trust tom hanks. if he comes up to you and says

oh the guy from booze swrom buddies. >> i won the lottery in new jersey. give me $50 and i will give you half the ticket. >> he is a man who can rip you of. can rip you off. >> the.. jeer yens should take -- the. jeer yens should take knots. >> tom hanks, horrible accident. have $350 million in the papping i need to split with you. we will close things out -- this is why the elderly shouldn't be on the internet. to see clips of recent shows go to fox news.com/red eye.

the post game wrap up. >> we will get a chick for $14. >> you can buy them and feed them for a year. >> jedediah, exciting new things happening next week?

>> jedediah bila.com. go and visit. >> moynihan, nobody cares. >> i certainly don't care. thank you, jedediah and bill schulz and patrick millsap and not you. caution. >> bill: the o'reilly factor is on. tonight: >> so fast forward, mr. hicks, to the sunday talk shows and ambassador susan rice. she blamed this attack on a individualsio. in fact, she did it five different times. whatwhat was your reaction to that? >> i was stunned. my jaw dropped. >> bill: brutal testimony today about how the obama administration mishandled the attack on our ambassador to libya. and three other americans who were murdered in benghazi. a key question. why did washington refuse to send help? >> i notified my leadership that we needed to go forward. when told that it was not the right time. >> bill: another key qu