>> 20 hard. >> 20 hard? >> get a face tattoo. >> 20 hard. >> 20 hard. welcome to "red eye." it is like this is your life if by your life you mean my last show i will ever do as a man. due to andy levy sufflok -- suffocating under a box of clothes there will be no half time. let's welcome our guests. she is hotter than a pawnshop wrist watch. i am here with a first time guest, miss new york, miss usa. she even waives like a beauty queen. look at that of the i can't stop looking at that name. filling in for andy levy is the chilean wine expert. he is considered one of the three men in the world who can name your zodiac sign just by

smelling your arm pit. amazing. and there is no reason for his existence, yet he is still here anyway. it is my repulsive sidekick, bill schulz. and if hilarity was crayons he would come in many delightful colors. the comedian sherrod small. >> hash tag red eye. >> a block. the lede. that's the first story. [inaudible]. >> it is true. can't argue the facts. are top spies in the enterprise? he was such a star trek fan that when he ran an army intelligence command he made it to look like the bridge of the star ship enterprise. general keith alexzander's high-tech room had it all, computer stations, a huge

monitor, doors that go woosh and of course the captain's chair you can see in the middle. a retired officer in charge of vip visits to the information dominance center as it was called. that sounds cool. quote, everybody wanted to sit in the chair at least once to pretend he was john luke pickard. on weekends i like to pretend i am someone else. >> wow. >> yeah. >> i have nothing to say or to add to that, but it is disturbing nonetheless. sherrod, good to see you. wouldn't any guy given this responsibility and a budget do the same thing as ridiculous as it sounds? >> no. >> no? all right. >> i would take that money and

take my boys to vegas. but he is a nerd. he wanted to be captain john luke pickard so he turned it -- i see no problem with it. these government people will spend the money on something, but if this is his way of being a freak, be a freak. >> don't spend a lot of money making up words. >> that is my new favorite word. you are right though. it is better they spend it on this than on prostitutes. >> exactly. >> those are the only choices we have? that's all we get? >> is this a good thing or bad thing or just a thing? >> it is a thing, but if you should do it, go all out. your interns, female interns should dress like sexy vulcans and getting you coffee. >> at least one person answering the phones back there. >> if you are going to commit to it, commit to it. as long as you do your job, i

don't see a be pro. >> that's my point exactly. maybe they would work longer, andy, stay at work longer if they felt they were in a movie. people like to leave when their shift is done because they don't like being in the office, like you and bill. the moment you find out there is no show they are gone. they are out the door. if the environment is pleasing, you would stay. >> yeah i -- no. i'm fine with a geek running the nsa. it is probably a plus to have the guy in charge understand the technical part of what they are doing. >> nerd. >> right. but this whole boys with their toys thing for a guy in that job that important i don't like it one bit. >> i suppose -- you know it is with andy, i suppose if it was something cool like dr. who and he traveled in a phone booth. >> if it was a giant tortoise

i would feel better. >> what is that? >> a time in dimension and space box. >> i thought it was a large turtle? >> i did too. >> i am on the wrong set. >> this is shark week. >> like the star trek series you have been dead for almost 30 years. do you see this as a waste of money? >> yes, this is a waste of money. have i no problem with nerds. of course you needs nerds to run the nsa. even the name, information dominance -- even that is nerdy. this is crossing the line. it is one thing to be dorky and work on all things hacking. but there is something unstable i don't like. i don't want these people knowing what i am doing. i don't want these people putting on their e-mails and fill in the blank on whatever person they will grab. and to your point, these are the guys that literally do get off on girls with vulcan

ears. when you see a girl the first thing you say it she would look good with pointy ears. >> but if you see the ears you know shoo is -- she is vulcan. do you get it? >> just by repeating it doesn't make it better. >> i will vulc the hell out of that girl. >> that is not making it better. you know what this reminds me of? when you had your first bedroom was it a theme bedroom? you had nothing but "star wars" stuff. maybe you had a friend with a "star wars" theme? >> i had a theme of masterbation. >> if you only kept it indoors. >> then i wouldn't have the monitor bracelet on my ankle. >> from star trek to what the heck. are they wasting time fighting

drug crime? police in the united states arrest more people for weed than for all violent crime combined. indeed there were over 1.5 million drug arrests last year with 750,000 for marijuana and according to a group of law enforcement officials who oppose the drug war, 82% of all drug arrests were possession only 42% were for marijuana. i am confused by those numbers. but says one member, every time a police officer makes an arrest for drugs, that's several hours out of his or her day not spent going after criminals. no surprise. crimes like bopping continue to go unpunished. that was terrible. as ms. new york, what is your stance on marijuana? >> here is the thing. i don't feel threatened by hippies. i feel threatened by racists

and burglars who might steal my crown and sash. >> i am two out of three. >> are you a burglar and a hippie. >> yes. >> i just wanted to clarify. i don't have to edit your comments out of the show. >> it was two safe answers in there. >> yes, but the fact -- never mind. joe app, i forgot -- joanne, i forgot what you were saying. >> it is about priorities, definitely. i do think that law enforcement officials are going after the wrong people. >> you are talking about sherrod. >> i get my stuff from the cops. >> you were arrested three times. >> never arrested in my life. too pretty for that. >> you are not at all pretty. >> he is too pretty. >> do you have an intellectual

intellectule assessment of the story? >> they are chasing these guys. it is not like d wi. it is like stop wasting money chasing dumb crimes that would would -- that were laws set in 1919. it was to stop harbor, woulder woulder -- harbor workers from smoking. i am happy everything is going on in colorado so they can show how other states are wasting money. >> what does this say about the war on drugs? >> it it says that the war on drugs is over. we hospital blail the cops for this. -- we shouldn't blame the cops for this. it is not part of their job description. it is the president's fault and the congressman's fault, et-cetera. it is a pointless attempt from stoping people from putting things in their bodies, and i think we just have to leave people alone.

>> use the word right. >> i don't know if he did. i think there was a decision when alcohol was invented that somehow we could only handle one legal thing. you can have the booze, but you can't have the pot. no, you can have the booze and the pot and the oxycontin and the hair -- heroin and put it in cigarettes and all of that. bill, you tried to get arrested so you can have a roof over your head. are you scared that you will try harder if they no longer arrest people like you? >> i don't like trying harder at anything. the thing i don't understand is i don't understand how you can call yourself a republican and not be for the de criminalization of marijuana. the amount of money wasted, forget the fact they are going after the wrong people. the amount of money it takes to incarcerate these people that are no more dangerous than a flower blowing in the wind.

they are not hippies, they are tryout. >> there is it a whole industry built around the nonsense. >> not saying i am stoned, but if you are mr. york can you call me east midtown? >> no. >> i will have a burlap sack. >> a horrible crime at union square. he was in and out of jail the guy that punched that dude and killed him. babbot, jeffrey babbot. the guy that hit and hilled him was in and out of jail. violent criminals need to be behind bars. they probably didn't have room because there are too many potheads. >> it is ridiculous. you know, the new strains of pot are pretty bad. >> stop talking about something you don't know.

you say that like it is fast. >> bob beckel told me jie. it should be a criminal offense to talk about getting stoned all the time. there is nothing more annoying. >> i agree. it makes pot illegal. can you imagine movies being made about drunks? >> bar fly movie. >> come on man. it is a black people movie. it dealt with drugs. >> what about "arthur 2, arthur on the rocks." wonderful. >> that was awful. >> from tfc to the nfc. on sunday night, undercover seattle police officers were wearing 49er jerseys. why were they dressed like men paning for gold? anyway at the seahawk stadium to look at fan on fan fisty

cups. why do they call it fisty cups? >> it is fancy jie. they have to take an on-line behavior course before being allowed back into the stadium after being banned. they hope the cops will further prevent the punching. explains a seattle police sergeant, the goal here is to get people to be on their best behavior. meanwhile our taiwan animater pals have a different goal to have fun with it. >> i don't see that as very accurate. >> i think liberties were taken. >> every american looks like a potato.

>> joanne, why do guys feel the need? i am a guy, but i don't hold violent vendettas over a team. i don't get angry if somebody doesn't have the same choice as me. >> you are probably just rational. >> that's not it. >> people are really passionate about their teams. i get that. they want to have a good time and have fun. the thing that stinks about this is it is like a bad school trip where you pray the chaperon is not sitting next to you on the school bus. so when people have to sensor themselves it is not a good idea. then when they get kicked out of the on-line course, their kids are taking it for them. they are not even in front of the computer. the whole thing will go out the window very soon. >> you know, an on-line course is the most self-defeating, self-can selling idea. you can take on-line courses for anything other than on-line courses. >> good point. >> sherrod, you could have saved me there.

say you could be best friends with a guy, and then you find out -- but then maybe you don't know him and you find out dash dosh see him in an opposing jersey. what do you do? >> i would kill him. i would get a knife and kill him. you won the at home game. i think it is a good idea. for years our fans go extra. there is stuff ichiro has to go through. ichiro, it may as well be jackie robinson. he sat through this -- i am talking yankee fans. >> yankee fans were anti-asian? >> they were going -- ichiro. i thought holly [bleep] this is the worst display of humanity in my life. >> were you watching a kung fu movie? >> i was watching wu tang.

>> andy, will this make it better or worse? >> i don't get how dressing undercover cops in an opposing team's gear will stop violence. i would say it brings violence that wouldn't normally happen. the real problem is grown as men and women jerseys. >> it is the american way. >> i can do it! it is fun for me! i have a lot going on in my life. sorry we can't all be addicted to ties. >> 40 years old and fat and can't play sports so i will put a jersey on and feel like a man. >> i am 30 great and not 38. >> but you wear old stuff, bill. you don't wear current stuff. >> i wear vintage stuff. your favorite players today may be with your team, but the next day they may not be. but old players are forever.

>> i just wear these old t-shirts. >> are you a yankees fan? >> i am. i still wear my posada t-shirt when i go to the game. >> way to offend her. >> i said wear a hat, wear a t-shirt. >> i just want to know what they are wearing, a t-shirt? >> just a t-shirt. >> oh my god. >> anyway you can elaborate on that? >> wait. he is having a seizure. >> when you are aroused you have epilepsy. good to know. oh god. t-shirt. >> why? nothing is as bad as europe or south america in terms of sports. they kill each other. they kill each other. >> for soccer. >> which isn't even real. >> it is not even a sport. >> they call it futboll.

>> they stole it from our football and they named it the same thing to make it popular. >> soccer is now like professional wrestling in that every conflict is rigged. so if a guy is running and he wants to -- he will fall. and then he holds his leg. >> and it is making its way to the nba. flopping. >> now it is no different than any kind of manufactured you sport. >> except more boring. >> like i always say, you can't spell soccer without suck. >> actually there is no u in soccer. >> there is a u in suck. because you suck. >> that can be universal. >> what is the problem with america? we discuss sherrod's new book "white people. the problem with america." >> it is a musical. >> should they be able to publish parts of your stolen diary? only the good parts a where you fan tau size about me.

he knows the star of herb and contains a stupid bird the secret diary has been published. according to the new york post owned by our parent company, kennedy lunched with david on a yacht and exposing the curb your enthusiasm creator was nervous around boats. the other activities include falconning and hosting games of capture the flag at their home with people like susan sarandon and tim robins. they reported that kennedy struggled with his lust

demons. >> we all do, brother. >> nothing new. and kept a scorecard of the many women he bedded. he is a [bleep]. anyway, let's go to the kennedy compound in hyannisport. ♪ >> i would have preferred that without the music. >> no! no, no, no. >> this story drives me crazy. i don't like the kennedy family that much, except a few. you are actually the only black member of the kennedy family. >> well jane kennedy. >> leon kennedy.

doesn't this bother you you can go to the post and read somebody's diary? >> yes. it is like private diaries. when do we say enough is enough? it wasn't that diaries with like garfield on the front and the little golden lock that protected nothing. >> this brings up a good point. what 55-year-old man has a secret diary? >> it is a journal. it is a journal and not a diary. >> the post said it was a secret diary. >> it is a journal, but it is written in a journal with sparkles on the front. >> he only has a dream journal. joy you are bringing up a good point. this was obviously for some kind of therapy thing and he was probably told by somebody to keep a journal. >> they set him up. >> yes, they set him up. they said it will help with your lust demons. i want you to comment on lust demons. >> the thing is, i think he is a sex addict. he clearly has issues.

i read some of the excerpts. if i was him i would be kicking myself i didn't make it more interesting. usually when you write a diary entry somebody will find it and read it. that's what happens with them. i would have made it a little more juicey and i think he is kicking himslef now. >> i always write nice things about people. in case they find it. >> i write stuff like -- his [bleep] tastes funny. >> in case they see it. what the hell is the life he is living? >> i will bleep out one word and everyone will know what you thought. should you that? the producers are lining. -- ar. >> and thank god they know what you are thinking. >> you keep a journal on your cats. are you worried about that getting out? >> i don't keep a private diary.

i am lactose intolerant so i eat a lot of dairy. >> that is a courtesey laugh. i hope that's a courtesey laugh. >> keep the camera back on here. >> you found the joke to be -- >> wow. this is the most i have made a girl laugh with my clothes on in a longtime. >> good job, andy. >> now she has the vapors. >> damn right it was a good day. >> to get to the serious point, i can't stand this. if you find a private diary and it has interesting, historical stuff, people can learn, then that's great. but for a gossip factor, i don't like that. >> i know i am not the only one who said this, but for all of the idiots who work in the media and critical of the nsa who are reading this or talking about this or even

publishing it they are hit critical a-holes. you can't gripe about the nsa looking at your stuff and not complaining and outraged over the fact that some guy's diary, whether he is a jerk or not, he didn't deserve this. i think the diary was stolen. his wife killed herself. dl is all of -- there is a bunch of grim [bleep]. if it was stolen how does the post do that? >> this country is disgusting. >> we should say i don't blame the post. >> thank you for that. >> this was the daily news' fault. >> fox is the parent company. >> is it too late to get them up in the scene. >> they did what they had to do. >> we found that rfk hobb knobbed with martha stewart and leo dekalb pre yow. leo dicaprio. your circle is hobo carl. it is horrible and sad your

life is. >> i hobb knob with hobo carl, but i don't know if hobb knob is the right word. i get money for hobb knobbing. i use a made up word and it doesn't mean anything. this is an actual item in the diary i wasn't supposed to read. he dubbed a day at the mall the, quote, worst nightmare of his existence. rfk junior says the worst thing that happened to him was a day at the mall. i am not saying it is mellow dramatic, but i can think of a couple things that happened in his life that may be worse than going to pay less. >> here is a guy that lived off his urges, and the idea of having to do something with your family at a mall is the worst thing you could ever -- >> unless it was black friday. >> and he was there at the grassy knoll shop.

>> that's the wrong kennedy. >> it is still a bloody day in history. >> i just thought it was funny that this is a kennedy's idea of hell is going to a mall where common folk are going to be. >> but that had to do with the fact the guy was struggling with demon. >> sex demons. >> and you can't go to the mall when you are struggling with sex demons. >> i think there is such a thing as sex addiction. he had like 10 girls there he had sex with and he had dash -- he put pens and knives. it was something a 15-year-old would write. >> poor thing. >> i think we have to take a break now. >> are white people trying to hold sherrod small down? first -- >> if we could live forever at any age, what would it be? write your answer on the tv screen and salsa so i can see it.

>> i apologize. new research suggests that couples today are falling a in love in half the time of their parents' generations because of social media and texting. young people say it takes a little over three weeks to become boyfriend and girlfriend where those over 55 put the timetable at two and a half months. they found to fall head over heels it takes couples an average of 24 tweets.

163 text messages, 70 facebook messages and 37 e-mails and 30 phone calls. that's about what i get from bill hemmer in an afternoon. discuss lets in the -- >> lightning roooooooooouuuunnnnnddd. lightning round. >> that was bad. >> you lost your breath again. >> i was holding on. that was for you miss usa, new york. >> try to ignore him. he is a bad person. from here. >> i'm sure. >> never mind. are relationships happening faster because of technology, and is that a good thing? >> yes, they are happening faster. i don't think it is necessarily a good thing. i don't know if there is a stable foundation for things to progress. and then they die so quickly because technology you get a new phone and you get a new boy end from -- boyfriend. >> do you like to date old

men? >> we all have our flavas. >> welcome to the show. >> do guys call you or text you? >> i don't get a lot of calls anymore. i like the phone calls, but there is a lot of texting. granted, you can plan what you will say and you can try to sound funny. on the phone i will put out spot to see how you do. >> your number by the way is 212-555-7373. >> 4 at the end. >> i actually use 555. it is pathetic. sherrod, are dating sites and social media making it too easy to ask a girl out? you wouldn't know, of course. >> first of all i think -- i am getting real here. people are too quick to say that's my girlfriend and that's my boyfriend. i need to see you in all seasons. i need at least a year. you can be a treat come january, but an a-hole in june. right?

i have to see you at christmas. i have to see you at thanksgiving. you could be one thing at the beginning of the year and something else at the end. >> conditional love. >> holidays. listen, holidays ruin relationships. >> i can sherrod saying, i need to see you when you are seriously ill, like cancer. are you not handling that well so you leave her? >> beat it. >> i might be like, hate you have cancer on the chin? i will marry you. >> i don't know how we got to this point, andy, but why are you alone? >> conscious choice. there is one part i don't like. 27% of people have broken off a relationship with a text. 13% with social media. that seems wrong to me. >> unless you met that way. >> it still sounds wrong. i don't know. there is one part i do like.

i never understood the three-day rule. that always seemed stupid to me. now people are saying they don't do that anymore. they text after like four hours. i think this is one way where texting has made it easier. you can send a text and say i had a good time. >> i never waited. when i get home, what's up? >> texting makes it easier to do that. >> right after the first date i would hang out in front of their house saying do you want to go out again? they would always act a little weird, but it was because they were excited too. >> and you weren't wearing pants. >> i wouldn't even call. i would take the phone and throw it at their face. that's how you get their attention. you have to be front and center about that. >> bill, you claim to have a smart phone, but it is a crush container of spam. not really a question, again. just pointing out that you are kind of a loser. >> well, kind of. i will take that. it's it's improving.

they will bring it up a notch and you are right. things happen quicker and they end 10 times quicker. usually for stuff on the phone that wasn't exactly inend ited for them. exactly intended for them. this was not a problem and was not an issue. this is a new thing that causes people to break up quickly. >> i sure do miss presenting men see scares. remember the old days? good old pregnancy scares. >> yes, like two weeks ago. >> bill is worried and the scare was he was pregnant. >> now you have to worry if you text the wrong woman about the pregnancy scare. >> all right. can you bag -- can your bag, sorry -- not yours. can a bag make you gag? a new study has found a third of women don't clean their happened bag. their handbag. they probably should. researchers swabbed a slew of

purses and came up with everything from e-coli, man and animal feces. >> women! >> and types of poisonous bacteria with a garbage pale. >> you are going to kill us. >> it is commissioned by mentos gum and women admitted to transporting things from used tissues to dirty underwear in their tote bags of terror. our results proved shocking, particularly as so many of us wouldn't think twice about eating loose gum found in the bottom of our bags. >> no! i would think twice. i would think twice. >> are women more gross than guys? >> disgusting. you ever look in a woman's bathroom? a restroom? it looks like baghdad. women hover and they won't touch the seat so they pea on everything. dudes at least we point. girls hover and everything is

liquid in there. >> begs the question, sherrod, how often are you in women's rooms? >> very often. i call that the poor man's vacation. i can get myself a lemonade. women have a lot more going on. they have, you know, female products and everything in there and underwear and your overnight bag, condoms you are trying to hide. >> i keep hearing him talk about women. >> don't get me wrong. i love you girls, but you are filthy animals. >> would you care to retort? >> you can either respond or ignore the last minute and a half. do you clean your handbag regularly? it is something you don't clean, right? >> i just did today after i read the study. the study had me at bloody stool. disgusting. when you really think about it, it is gross. how often do you clean your cell phone? you are constantly touching

that and touching your mouth. >> maybe that can be a new business, dry-cleaning for handbags. >> i was thinking about that for phones. i see people in the men's room at fox who are in the toilet stall and doing their business and talking on the phone. it is disgusting. >> you know what is just as dirty as your phone? your handle on your toothbrush. >> that's because of where you put it. not everyone is like you, dude. you take a picture and you send it to the person after they have used it. >> two things, one, this is whraw talking about is exactly why one of the reasons this study is garbage. one day it is don't touch the doorknobs and the next it is the toothbrush. you will not die from going into your handbag. the other point is -- let me tell you why the study is done. they made a big deal about not eating the bum. mentos wants to buy the gum. if you have loose gum in there and you eat it -- that's one less sale for them.

they want you to go back -- you say i have to buy more men toes. >> when mentos started doing multi flavors, they got me. like the fruit flavored mentos, fantastic. i think that means they will send me some. >> what kind of company names their product men's toe's. that's the last thing i want to nibble on. kidding, of course. >> a butterscotch is always good at the bottom of a purse. you ever go into your grandma's purse and grab a werthers? >> i have had men's toes that tasted like butterscotch. i won't lie. i'm bragging. time to take a break. "the joy of hate" buy this book. autographed copy, g gutfeld.com. paperback soon. buy it. a.

it is a grueling test of how well you rest. nasa, whatever that is, is looking for people to lie in a bed for 70 days in order to study the human body's response to microgravity which is like gravity, but micro. they will be paid $5,000 a month and tilted in a bed with their feet raised above their head 24 hours a day and 16 hours in light and 8 in darkness. tv, video games, books and internet are permitted and they are able of all things to shower in bed. this sounds like heaven to me, sherrod. >> i have a cousin doing this already. i don't think nasa knows about it. >> busy, hard working americans? would you do this? >> i wouldn't do it. >> for what? nasa is a relic. >> sherrod. >> i would do it for space x.

>> what the heck is that a? >> that's the space now. >> that's a good point. it is private. it is like you would rather work for fed ex than the post office. joanne, would you do this? >> no. i like to walk around and go on dates and shop. i read in a study all of the health issues that come about. and then they say afterwards we will give you two weeks to get back to normal. it is like, i don't know. you just spent two and a half months. >> there is something about bed sores i don't like. but $5,000 a month buys a lot of bandaids, andy. you spent 70 days in your apartment weeping. it does president sound like much of -- it doesn't sound like much of a challenge. >> are doing it for further -- >> you are doing it for further space exploration and you can do it while lying in bed all day. >> it is the luis and clark

oflet air gee. >> i have the pioneer spirit, but i can live without the hardships of being a pioneer. i think we need studies like this if we will ever get off this planet. kudos to nasa and the volunteers. >> this planet is doomed. >> bill, shut up and answer any question that ends with you suck. >> cane give you a good visual example? can we look at the photo of those two dudes? look at the photo. do you know what this is? the after photo. these guys probably came in looking normal and now they look like white dudes on the tie hua niece animation video. your kidneys will fall and you will get bed sores and you will probably gain 50 pounds. >> he is playing guitar. the guy learned how to play guitar on his back. that's awesome. >> that's the pioneer theory. >> they will never know how to do it standing up, greg. that's what happens. not cool.

>> i would do this. >> you would g hours. >> the people who do this are the ones who give their bodies to science. >> i give mine to god. you. >> god is his drug dealer. jay do you have a comment on the show? go to fox news.com. do you have a video of your animal doing something interesting? go to fox news.com/red eye. click on submit a video and we may use it. stay right there. our final topic of the night is next.

is 50 nifty? the midcentury mark is the best time to be alive. the on-line survey asked 2,000 people representing every demo demo -- we did a lot of studies. if you could live forever in good health at a particular anal, what age would you like to be? on average the answer was 50. sherrod, are they lying? >> they are lying their ass off. it is 25 to 25, 30. stop it. you think michael jordan would want to be -- for the rest of his life? no he would want to be 23.

>> he tried that. he played baseball. >> i believe anybody who said 50 would take a younger age in a heartbeat. they are probably at the peak of their wealth. >> most say 25. >> but i don't know if i would want to stay at this age because i am broke. i am not filthy wealthy, so i think at 50 you have made the mistake u.s. and are wiser and you know who you are and you have accepted the things you can't change. you can look like you are 25 because of medicine and technology. >> you can look like a horrible 25 with everything plastic and horrifying and women look like lions with their stupid mouths. >> we know the insides are dead. >> bill, you are 57.

bill, are you 57? >> how many times do i have to tell you? >> try to make it hard to answer questions. >> i think this is crap because i would like -- i feel like i would have liked to have been in my 20s, but i don't remember anything. not a bless said thing. 30s are blurry and i hope 40s i will have a little more together and insert the part where i will be dead before that happens. >> you won't make it. >> you have been miserable at every each. at every age. is each year closer to death a better one? >> i am not miserable and i like my life a lot. don't tell anyone though. >> it is ridiculous to think that 50 is the age that people would like to live forever at. what age would you like to live forever? >> if forever -- that's insane. if you are going to live forever you might as well have a young body in good shape. >> i would have chose like six months old.

i would be pooping in my diaper forever. >> you would be a wise baby. >> people would like me because i would be like a genius baby. >> and you would be the same height you are now. >> i thought i would come up with an interesting auction. >> somebody needs a nap. >> funny because it is true. i do need a nap. i fell asleep in the office and erased the questions for the show. >> he is wearing a onesie under his clothes. >> yeah. how much time do we have? >> enough time to seat onesie. >> where are you performing? >> on the celebrity panel a with lance bass. best week ever is starting on friday, this friday the 20th, best week ever is back and the king is back on. >> joanne you have anything you want to plug? >> have i absolutely -- i have absolutely nothing happening

right now. if you have something for me let me know. >> oh i have something for you. >> hey, hey! >> bill, andy levy, me, sherrod, bye. &pl[÷!c(/

the factor begins right now. the factor is on tonight. >> there is something evil in our society that we as americans have to work to try and eradicate. >> 12 more americans shot dead by one of their fellow citizens. is this on going violence harming the nation's image throughout the world? we'll have the latest on the navy yard massacre and charles kradhammer will weigh in. >> i don't think that mr. putin has the same values we do. >> the russians openly mocking the usa because of the navy yard killings and saying we are not an exceptional country. we'll deal with that.