more adventures await in the new seven-passenger lexus gx. lease the 2014 gx 460 for $499 a month for 27 months. see your lexus dealer. hello everyone. i'm greg gutfeld. this is laces and horns. the show about the best way to put on shoes. tonight we discuss wing tips and we'll have a quiz on the history of pumps. i can't wait and i'm sure neither can you. first, let's welcome our guests. she's so hot that forest fires hand out pamphlets to prevent here. i'm here with patty ann browne and filling in for andy levy is his brother ace levy.

he's responsible for more leaks than julian assange. it's my side kick bill schultz. his hair once landed a 747. sitting next to me is nick gillespie. look at the hair. has our rate of hate reached a new state. a poll shows americans are tired of business as usual. sounds like the name of a band. what's your name, "business as usual." 60% of us say every single member of congress, including our own representative should be beaten to a pulp and thrown off

a cliff. i mean fired. that's the highest ever figure since lindsay lohan. this is backed up by a new poll shows that 60% believe democrats and republicans are doing a bad job that a third party is needed. let's check in with our watching correspondent, stunt squirrel mike. ♪ >> that added nothing to the discussion. is it good to hear people hate government or big government? >> are you talking to me or my hair? >> you. >> it's a long term trend.

people say this is just happening now. this same basic trend has been around for 40 years and it's finally really taking off, which i think is great. the best figure in that one where do we need another party, if you look at independents it was something like 71% of inspects think there should be another party or option. i would settle for two options. can we get a second party that is just people who want to do what we all know what people want government to do is get out of our personal lives and cut spending. >> that's all we need. >> i think it's overrated. >> everybody is now blaming the government, which i'm fine with. in a way that's all they will do is blame the government. it never really translates into anything else. you know where i'm going? >> i do. that's why i'm not sure i believe this poll. at the end of the day people in

bentss. there are some good ones in there. >> name one. >> if you throw them out you have to replace them with someone and you could end up with somebody worse. >> you replace them with robots that only say no. if i become president in the next couple of years, it could happen when my machine is invented that turns me into a monster. robots that say no is the answer to everything, andy. >> isn't that the tea party? >> yes. that's insulting and accurate. >> i'm with you. i don't buy these polls. that's what people are saying now and probably feel but when 2014 rolls around every incumbent will be voting back. if you want term limits, stop

voting for the same people. >> it's not term limits. i bill, polls show that 102%, which is more the actual amount of people polled think that you should be fired or rather set on fi

fire. you ma >> you made it a question. my favorite part is that 47% of americans do not strongly identify with either party. to that i say and. it's about time. people are starting to develop hobbies. they're stopping identifying themselves with party affiliations. they're starting to make friends. they're starting to find ways to not join a rabid side of the party to have friends as a result. this is good news. it's good for the rest of us. >> here is my theory. everybody hates obnoxious celebrities. you still order it. you go see oceans 11 or oceans 12 because it's a good movie. that happens.

>> may i say something? >> sure. >> i think the public thinks these politicians are baby and they want to throw the baby out with the bath water. >> i agree with that freak. do they love super powers but hate taking showers. with it a plea from event organizers asking visitors to shower before they leave the house. this is offensive. posted on the events website as part of a survival checklist with a note that read, "things tend to get hot at nycc. with so many fans around and you don't want to be the stinky one. do everyone a favor and shower before you wear clean clothes. for those of you that have never been it's an annual four day event that attracts adults who like to dress up and play make believe. expected to attend is about $ 0

130,000 geeks, dweebs and guys named andy. i'll be relaxing with this fella. clearly we know who will have the better weekend. it's not him. andy, you covered this event for "red eye" last year. was the stench a big deal? >> no. here is what i saw. i saw bunch of really cool guys and a lot of incredibly hot women. i don't know what this is all about. let's take a look. can we put that up? there's scarlet and emma frost. two very attractive women. another one. very cute. we have this, wonder man. >> look at the rack. >> this was all normal attra attractive people. this is fashion week for nerds. leave my people alone.

>> i think this is an intolerance. it's intolerance against a segment of society that's good for the economy. >> i thinkle that are ashamed of having read comics who are saying these people are smelly and stinky. most of them haven't developed sweat glands yet. >> they're like closet gays. >> this is for the people who run comic con. >> i can't imagine that's true. it's like frat guys who are secretly gay or have longings and they want to beat up homosexuals. >> kind of made that point. thank you. >> nick is saying he wants to beat up homosexuals. >> you're outing yourself now. >> we were talking in the green room how you love a good costume.

would you go to something like this? i think you would be widely popular. >> i wouldn't. i husband is a huge fan high pressure pressure. he doesn't go to comic con. these tips came from the organizers of comic con. >> this is something that ultron would have come up with. >> whoever that is. >> it's so funny that the hot woman does not know what you're talking about because she had a social life. >> she doesn't realize this is it. >> what are you talking about? >> do you even know about the avengers? i don't think you know who you are. >> bill, you covered this event two years ago for "red eye" and weren't invited back. you must have smelled twice as awful. >> no. i kindly let andy do it last year because he was whining a lot and wearing his costume around two weeks before the

event. may i say something? >> no. >> i think a lot of public thinks these guys, these adults that dress up as avengers and whatnot are babies and they want to throw the babies into the bath. that's tonight's talking point. >> it's not. it's never going to it. >> that's tonight's talking point. >> here's the talking point. i think comic con is such an amazing thing. most people aren't aware of it. they're not aware of it. there's millions, perhaps 200 million people out of the 340 million who don't know what comic con is. there needs to be something where they can sign up for comic con and understand it. >> you can order tickets for comic con online and do it, which is nice. >> i was hoping we would be able to make this political. >> we did.

from scamps to stamps. they're kicking. they're licking. the united states postal service may be destroying an entire run of stamps because they portray a headless plan and doing a cannon ball. the problem started when the post office asked the first daily to help launch the just move stamps. i like how they are highlighted. this led to the president's council raising concerns about those three stamps. according to lynn's stamp news where i get all my stamp news, the usps decided to kill the entire series. a post office spokesperson says they haven't made a final decision yet. speaking of not wearing helmets. >> oh, my. >> you'll be happy to know it

didn't survivor. it's fine. finally buried. i'm kidding. it's doing well in the cemetery. patty, would you let your son anywhere these stamps that seem to encourage hideous violence in. >> first of all, we have a fox news alert. the president's council on fitness mfit ness has changed its slogan to just don't move. it's way too dangerous. since then do you wear a helmet to do a head stand. since when a cannon ball dangerous. they have other ones that are dangerous. it's as usual the nannyism is selective and random. it's all over the place. it's ridiculous. >> like how you called them the soccer person. >> it's not an athlete. you didn't say soccer player. you said soccer person.

it's like somebody working the counter at soccer r us. is this an example of our tax dollars at worse or not any tax dollars at worse? >> it does get certain interests. so pathetic. it makes me ashamed to be on "red eye." earlier this year the post office released a lunar new year stamp that had fire crackers. you would light and throw in your sister's bedroom. i don't know what to say about this. >> all i know is fire crackers are awesome. wouldn't this story have made a great chapter if your new book? >> this is another example of what i call the obamafication of

the american wussies. >> it's on new york's best seller list. >> self-published. it debuted at number six with a bullet. they can't say that anymore so now with a dot. >> further obamafication. >> this is dumb. the post office usually does this smoking. it was 1994. the great movement robert johnson. they had a stamp commission with a cigarette in his mouth. this is dumb. >> do kids know what stamps are? take some stamps. >> who are the people that buy specific stamps? >> ding, ding, ding.

>> i don't mean stamp collectors. you ever go an ask for a specific stamps. >> it was like sealed with love stamps. >> aww! >> they should be showing up. >> are those with seal, the pop star. i love those. bill, the usps did say they would be willing to release a stamp of you getting hit pay semitruck while not wearing a helmet of any kind. thoughts. >> the ones that aren't destroyed will be worth thousands. truly collecting stamps in a joy that lasts a lifetime. there's nothing dangerous about cannon ball. an eight ball can be dangerous, which is why i tell you all kids

watching do not snort one unless you have a parent present. >> and a helmet. >> and a helmet. >> they will take the stamps and send them to third world countries where they can use the stamps while wearing our athletic jerseys that we don't use. >> stamps can be dangerous if they're coated with lsd. that brings up a good point to you kids at home. coat the lsd with stamps. >> here is the issue. we're consumed, not we but the media is consumed by safety while ignoring far more destr t destructive things like kem trails. i think somebody has to say it. we're sitting here worried about stamps when there's kem trails. are they going to take me out. >> the black helicopters will show up and take you away. >> why do they have to be black?

>> may i say something? i feel the obama administration is treating our adolescence like babies. at this point they're trying to throw them out with the bath water. we discuss the new book, i wouldn't know. i'm freaking hot. now in paper back. why isn't elementary school banning tag? who cares as long as they don't ban tab. i love that drink. it really is the king of diet cola. the day we rescued riley was a truly amazing day.

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i want to read this tweet from somebody watching o' reilly. tell nick that part wagner wants his hair back. they're making chainges to the exchanges as people continue not to sign up for obama care. i think it's time for the latest edition of this. a tax prep company found the deadline for signing up is mid-february, not march 31st as we were lied to earlier. hollywood continues to run full steam ahead with usc receiving half a million dollar grant to make sure producers, writers,

have up to date relevant facts on health care reform to integrate into their story line and projects. for more on this horrible story we're going to go live to a sneezing baby. either that is a bunny or a hairy baby. the sign update. the tax prep company announces this and not the government, that's amazing. you would expect the government to tell you because they're running it and you hear from h and r block. >> it was actually jackson hewitt. people do not want obama care. they're not likely to warm to it when they get fined for not signing up on time when they were never even told that the

deadline is way sooner than they thought. it's ridiculous. >> it is horrible. >> i don't think anybody really got the penalty part of obama care in general. they got the free part. everybody hears free health care but they didn't know there's a penalty floating off in the distance. that's the problem here. you told me you still trust obama care. >> they're taking out my gallbladder later tonight in i can get through to them. >> where are you guys going? >> he won't tell me. the gallbladder won't talk either. it's stunning when you look at the roll out of this. i want to say i think the republican party really made a big mistake. when you're enemy is killing themselves like the worth thing you want to do is get in the way of them. if they had been talking about debt limit and government shutdown instead of obama care, this would have been in. >> i agree. i believe people got wrapped up

in a false better that they knew they would lose but it felt good. i call it self-appointed bouncer syndrome. if you didn't go with this shutdown story, you're not a conservative. everybody got scared. >> self-appointed bouncer. >> somebody appoints themselves as the velvet rope for a movement an it's only happening in certainly pockets. andy, is this more of the same or less of the different? >> first of all, i like your explanation of the self-appointed bouncer thing, rhino. i'm happy that jackson hewitt discovered this. the hollywood thing -- he's a painter. >> this is product placement. obama care is not going to be an integral part of a tv show. it will be shoe horned into

there into stories that have nothing to do with it. >> it will be killing someone on boardwalk and you did get that website in 1920s america. >> it's no different than kar s character saying we have to cah those bad guys, let's take the ford focus. >> what do you have against ford focus? it's a snappy little car. >> it's ford foci. >> nick's little improve there. >> not impressive to our viewers that don't have hbo. >> really trained in improv. >> usc got a 5 billion dollar grant to make sure all viewers find you and kill you. does this seem like a good idea, right? >> i've decided any time a question ends in my death i'm bringing the babies in the bath water from now on.

mr. gillespie is right. >> excuse me, dr. gillespie. >> the popularity of obama care has been boosted by 20% thanks to the government shutdown by the gop. i intend to agree with dr. carson when in a voters value summit he compared obama care to slavery and then said it was worse than slavery. i welcome him to fox news. >> one simple thought. ibm or exxon could run obama care but obama care could not run ibm or exxon because government is obsessed with programs and not people. >> they set the date to get a penalty, march 31st. it turns out coverage starts on the first of the month. that makes no sense. they couldn't say we'll make it

april 1st because it's april fool's day and idiots like us would say see. >> speak for yourself. i don't know what april fool's is. >> it's because every day is april fool's day for you. >> may i say something in. >> no. >> baby bath water, talking point. coming up, can you be happy without fame or fortune? we discuss patty ann browne's new book, i love to live the high life while you suffer. not winning any fans there. spoiler alert. air canada hates dogs. sometimes i wish i had taken that free class news corp. was offering. huh, fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. everybody knows that. well, did you know that when a tree falls in the forest

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effective. only three of has to hoofed creatures are still working. the rest have been made into jackets worn by nick gillespie. they are fine. they are resting comfortably at my place. god knows what they are in for later. will parks become overgrown forests because of this? >> there are more essential workers there than at the department of education than on a percentage basis. i did not understand this story. >> if i had a nickel for every time a guest says that. >> became worried that there are goats everywhere in america. i thought they got rid of them. >> i love them. >> they are gruff and poorly mannered. >> that have beards and are on

all fours kind of like bill. they don't know they are being paid. there's no such thing as goat money. >> i don't know what they will do with their currency. >> just spend it on junk. >> i bet they would eat it. >> i don't really see why you would furlough them. i was surprised to see the three working goats are in eastern pennsylvania. $1200 for all three goats and they kill all the weeds. the average residential lawn is less than an acre. you could get by on one goat. it's a bargain. sdp sdp >> it is bargain. it's not a furlough. it's a furry low. >> let me tell you why they have been furloughed. they are being used by the government as scapegoats. >> no landscape goats.

nice. i win. >> hold on. no. go goats. >> okay. >> i think you know what i'm saying. >> i think we should all stop kidding around. >> i'll work on the out rage of the furlough goat as soon as troop benefits are taken carry of. nobody care about your furloughed goats. >> there's so many bizarre things going on. bill, your apartment is overgrown with weeds. would you consider using some of larry's goats? >> yes. they're better than the easter bunny and more magical. the goat would leave these magical r magical raisins around. i would eat them until my heart

is content. i can taste them now. >> i think those who protest should migrate. do goats migratmigrate? to d.c. >> or just block off the beltway. >> just send me your raisins. they're delicious. >> next topic. i apologize for that. according to a recent column, they're willing to kill bald eagles in order to save them. they proposed a permit that would allow a wind energy project to kill five golden eagle is year over a five year period. that's four million eagles. the reasoning is wind energy reduces the co2 in the air which redouuces climate change and benefits eagles and wildlife.

i was for this when thought they were talking about the band. >> i was for, i just don't think any energy source should be subsidized even if it is killing eagles. >> do you think peta will step up and fight this like they do everything else or because it's for wind mills they'll be okay with it? >> i don't know. it's selective enforcement. selective is my word. >> there's the murderer right there. that's the manson family of alternative energy. go ahead. >> it's okay. they make sure they enforce these rules protecting the eagles when it comes to an oil company or a gas company but they're going to exempt because it's wind energy. the wall street journal pointed out all the wind farms produced global carbon dioxide.

>> it's wishful thinking. it's hot air. i want you to take a look at those. look at them mock the birds. look how peaceful i am and somehow slow i'm going. you get there and then you get hacked to pieces. it happens to billions of birds, andy. when are we going to give up on wind energy and invent something like cat energy. >> we already have something better. we have nuclear energy. it's powerful, clean and 100% safe. let's do this. i always trust a government with a five-year plan. that's always a good sign. >> are you serious? >> no. yes, i'm totally serious. why are the eagles getting killed by the wind turbine? >> i don't know. >> they're stupid. how about this eagle, don't fly into the wind turbine. problem solved.

>> look at the picture. >> we're going to get letters from eagles. >> i don't care. this is tough love. >> or at least wear helmet. >> i want eagles to send their letters to andy levy even if it's hard to write with those little claws. stand on the laptop like this. >> who dounesn't know not to fl into a wind turbine. it's flying 101. >> weren't you ever young? >> yes. i never flew into a blade. i didn't need the government to stop me. i just didn't do it. >> bill, you livered in a free with an eagle because they thought you were a baby eagle. do they need as much productite as we think? >> no.

since when do we put eagles in front of people. as far as eagles are concerned, they're no goats. i love those magical raisins. >> problem with this theory. co2 emission and temperature have not coincided. the warming has flattened. they say that way for another 30 years. the correlation is still not there and the models have been faulty. we've lost andy. nuclear power, fracking that's all you need to do. time to take a break. you know what's special, any book the joy of hate. you can get it at amazon.com right now. i signed that book. michael, tell us why you used priceline express deals

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they won't fret about losing your pet. last week an air canada employee defied instructions taped on grate and took a 2-year-old greyhound out for walk. the pup escaped. it's not happy story. >> the man is naked walking his dog. >> dog escaped and has not been seen since. cbs sacramento affiliate had e-mailed the airline about this story and they received the following reply. an e-mail which was sent to them unintentionally. i think i would ignore. it's local news doing a story on a dog. the entire government is shutdown and about to default and this is about how they are spending their time. >> i'm sure i'm horrified. they don't take think anymore seriously than they have. >> i may have been wrong about that which is why i should do my

homework. there's got to be a feeling to describe sending an e-mail to the wrong person. who hasn't done that? that was meant to go somewhere else and it went to the wrong person. >> i've done that. >> in any case. my biggest question is why was the dog, especially a show dog named larry. >> i think that's great. it was named after a stooge. >> it's a girl >> how many times do i have to say it? >> at this point i think canada and the u.s. are even from the 7' '79 hostage rescue. >> when was the last time you accidentally sent an e-mail to the wrong person and did it involve a dog miss something.

>> i haven't done it in a long time. this is the air canada spokesperson. >> you should be fired. >> he should. as he points out this is local news. they have an hour. they're supposed to cover the local news and a little bit of national and international in there. even if there's a big national story, they have to cover the other things. it's just a ridiculous, ridiculous excuse. >> i would call it a plane by dog story. >> wow. >> andy, does this e-mail make a good point? >> no. the local news station will cover local stories and who says who cares the government is shutdown. you lost a guy's dog. not only should air canada apologize, i think the canadian government should apologize for canadian airline loses this beloved bat. i'm calling for a boycott of

canada until they apologize. >> how about a dog cot? >> do you wish someone would you out of your crate? >> yeah. i'm not siding with air canada but this local news crew is they got that and they're like, they went straight back to the girl and said look what they said rather than addressing the question at all. they just got her more angry an continued the story. they had some news holes to fill. that should be "red eye's" tag line. >> this happened to me years ago. i was sending an e-mail to a pr person who was no longer working there so it bounced into his box and he sent it to the press. >> good for him. >> shouldn't a greyhound take the bus? >> i don't follow.

>> i don't either. >> i don't know. >> we'll be right back. >> yeah. >> your not allowed to say that. >> i just said it. >> stay here. no commercials. >> we're taking a break. >> you have a comment on the show, e-mail us. you have a video of your animal going something. go to foxnews.com. i have 90 seconds to go to foxnews.com/redeye. stay right here. >> you have 20 hard. >> our last to tipic of the nig is next. >> all right. we're clear. i quit my job a while back to be with the kids, and honestly, it was a little scary to go down to one income. so, i had to get creative. i made some missteps. i switched to some weird bargain detergent instead of tide but no matter how much i poured, our clothes were missing that tide clean we were used to. iean, what would my grandma say if she saw the kids looking dingy?

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a brand new "red eye" returns monday at 3:00 a.m. eastern time. our guests inclues kirsten hag lynn and gavin mckinnis. >> new hampshire elementary school, is there any other kind reminding parents and students playing tag violates the school's no contact rule

for a recess game. side note i'm so tired of places telling me they have a no contact rule. anyway. >> the principal tells a local newspaper there that several concussions and broken wrists and other injuries led her to post a letter -- why are you laughing? -- on the school web site informing parents of the school's safety policy. she adds she wants children to be active but must be dmun a safe way. >> condemn. >> it's -- taking away tag a violation of student rights? >> yes. i don't understand. i was laughing because like, you know, broken wrists? is this like thunderdome elementary? >> is something else going on? >> it's just a bunch of roller skates people have to fall on. worst thing is after playing tag they have to come inside

and collect stamps. >> the oh! >> welcome back. >> we'll be right back. >> i'm just going to let the camera ringlinger on that disgusting human being. >> greg this is another example of what i like to call obamafication of america, too. >> check out our new book. the obamafication of america. >> i thought they were taking away my swedish mass use and i was super unhappy. can you just put the cover up again? of the book? who is your inspiration for the cover? >> i have a lot of inspirations and will be thanking a lot of people in author notes but i don't want to reveal that now. >> you're getting down to brass tack autos some people you don't know, some people

you know well. a bunch of people. >> you know people are googling that title now. >> doesn't being look like you're messing around. >> everybody shut up. let me ask patty ann a question. have you a son. he goes to school. i can't be sure with your life style. as a partner, parent, oh... >> would you be offended by this? >> yes. >> that is the question. >> where are we? look. let kids be kids. everything you do involves risks. you just can't lock inside and not do anything. i think -- this is all about lawsuits you know? stay out of concussions. i agree with nick. how are people getting concussions from tag? >> they suck at it. >> you suck at it. >> probably there have been lawsuits that is what this is all b let's kill all of the lawyers. >> what?

are you kidding snee. >> my whole family is lawyers. i can't say that. >> usually when you're a kid you were it at the game of tag or told you you were it as they ran from your stench. >> i hate to say it but tag is horrible. people would say i was a tag hag. that i thaid be wrong. when i was a kid, people would come up to me and say mom says i can't play tag with you because you have hepatitis. tag doesn't ininjure your risk, it injures your hole soul and hepatitis does injure your liver. >> all right. tag spelled backward is gat. gat is slang for gun. i say, ban it. or is gat a goat-cat hybrid? would it make me race them?

i don't know. god help us all. i apologize for the previous hour, thanks to patty ann brown. bill shultz, andy levy. nick and his hair. that does it for me. i'm greg gutfeld, caution. (ding, ding)

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>> they come here to kill us and we worry about what they think of us. why would you give the criminals an advantage. get the hell out of your eliteist head power. put on your big boy pants, from president. didn't you win the nobel peace prize? yes, you were the one. give it back. throw them all out, like all of you, i'm fed up. this week the ultimate injustice to every american and every member of the military who gave his or her life for this country.