hello, everyone. i'm kimberly guilfoyle along with bob beckel, eric bolling, dana perino, and greg gutfield. it's 5:00 in new york city, and this is "the five." the show must go on. can america survive if americans don't know anything about our country? check out this new presidents' day prank pulled off by jimmy kimmel. one of his reporters on the street notified people about the death of fda. >> president roosevelt passed away due to natural causes at a very old age. do you have condolences to give his family? >> a good man, and i'm sorry for

his fan. >> do you have anything to say to his wife? >> i'm truly sorry for your loss. >> did you follow his account on twitter? >> oh, yeah y he's a funny guy. >> what were you favorite jokes, when he would make fun of obama for his ears? >> oh, yeah, i'm trying to think of more. >> last night on the factor, bill o'reilly was fired up about a newsweek survey that shows 25 first of americans couldn't nak biden as our vice president, 43% couldn't define the bill of rights, and 67% didn't know our economic system is capitalism. bill thinks he knows why americans are having a hard time answering these simple questions. >> it's quite clear the american public school system is our main culprit. i know there are good schools, bust most schools could not care less about instructing how our country works. number two, the internet has created a generation of

self-absorbed, addicted, distracted, and ignorant people. therefore, we are a country in decline primarily because 320 million american citizens aren't paying attention. they do not seem to be interested in the welfare of their country. they are primarily interested in their own welfare. >> we're going to get back to o'reilly in a moment. we had our own toxic mess up on t "the five." >> look at this. >> how can i talk without my notes? >> eric and his exuberance as he usually is, went to wave. and he knocked a cup of coffee all over. >> dana's lap, too. >> dana was up for 15 hours writing all those notes. all of greg's jokes are wet. let's see if he comes up with some original material after this. >> that looks like the museum of the constitution. >> one of the funniest things i have ever seen. >> the beauty of live television.

you never know what's going to happen. >> i wouldn't call it beauty. >> it depends on if you're into abstract coffee. >> a full immersion. >> mine went in the hot tub and it survived. there's hope or there's help. bob, you seem to be the only one not involved in the multicar wreck here, and you don't seem to be wet. >> like north carolina turnpike in the snowstorm. >> terrible, my gosh. >> let me make several comments about uncle bill o'reilly. i think it's a somewhat elitist to suggest that people sit around in america and think about politics the way we do. nothing is really changed much. if you ask these questions back in the '50s, you could have gotten this answer. i think frankly, if anything, things have gotten better. i give bush credit for getting some serious education stuff done. i think the idea that -- now, do i agree with him that technology

has sort of blunted a generation? maybe so. let's also remember, a lot of people get educated on the internet. they go to college on the internet. that was never available before. i don't agree with them. >> what about the fact, we have union dominated schools? it's impossible to fire teachers who aren't performing properly. that's why people are looking for an alternative education for their children, via charter schools, via private schools, because of what is going on. never mind the crowding in public schools, and my favorite things, you can't even fire a sexual predator. >> most public schools are pretty good. >> that's not a fair assessment, and by the way, your numbers -- >> could you spill more coffee? >> the high schools aren't doing better. we're 31 -- number 31 in the world in math skills. 21 in reading skills. and tanking. you know why? you want to know why? technology. we have apps for everything. you want to know what tip you have to leave? we have an app for that. you want to write something, and

you spell something wrong, it's highlighted for you. you spelled it wrong. you can press a button to tell you your grammar is wrong. people don't have to learn. we're dumbing down our complete society because we're relying on technology. >> are you done sucking up to o'reilly on this or what? >> i think he's right on this. >> i have to disagree because i think i'm with bob on this. it's easy to blame technology when it's actually ideology. technology is an inert substance, it's like blaming the mailman for junk mail. it's the ideology that we're worried about. what's going through the vessels of information. history is now histrionics. we don't talk about fact. we talk about feelings in school. what we're worried about is the triumph of progressivism in education that has basically changed or may be shrinking the minds of our young people. we see it as a failure, but i think that other people see it as a defining success.

that the decline of the west somehow is a good thing. david didn't kill goliath. goliath killed goliath. >> when i listen to you, it's groundhog day. >> but i did agree with you. we can't blame technology for allowing this pernicious poison to invade our kids' heads. >> ms. perino? >> i think there's good and bad, as with most things. let me give you one example. today in the wall street journal, there's a story about a decision in florida for the community colleges, whether or not students should have to take remedial courses when they get to college before going on to graduate because they're finding if the students are made to take remedial courses, their rate of graduation is somewhat less. so now we're going to leave it up to students to decide whether they need to go to english 101 again, and also the government is getting involved, which is sort of bizarre. i think on the education part, we've got a long way to go to

catch up to the things we have lost. on the other side of it, technology hasn't corrupted everybody's minds, and we talked, you talked about this this morning on the show with andrea, bob, about the uaw vote and tennessee. which failed. to me, that means that people are still able to make up their own minds based on information they gather, especially when it's going to affect their pocketbooks and those people there made a decision after a vote. you never want to underestimate the ability of the american people to understand issues, to grasp them, grapple with them, and made decisions on their own. there's a lot of things we have to fix, but i think technology wise, if you don't need to know the exact date that so-and-so was president, and because you have access to look it up, that's probably okay. >> if you took a camera out to times square, you could find, and you could edit, you could find any number of people who come up with this, when did fdr die? who is joe biden? >> do you follow him on twitter? >> there's no evidence that i

see except this is, you know, i give o'reilly credit, and jesse for doing that, whatever they call that, attack tv. >> ambush, yeah. >> but so what? you could edit it. >> how do you explain a slide? you look at the top ten countries. six or seven are asian countries. it's china, various asian cultures. >> right. >> and they're winning. they're the top five in science, math, and reading across the board. we've slid from, i don't know, maybe 15 years ago, we were around 15, 16, and now we're 31 in math, 21 in reading. >> that's really unacceptable. >> and 26 in science. this is a fail. this is a massive fail on our part. >> it's also hard to teach history if you really don't like your history. and i think you're seeing that a lot in education. people just don't have a high view of what america is, so what's the point of teaching it? >> or how we got here? >> it's just a bunch of dead white men. >> lels rr remember, they also don't think much about politics. we think about politics every day.

most average americans don't get up in the morning and get consumed on what's going on in politics. >> not in my e-mail chain. >> you have to admit, bob, as kimberly pointed out when she threw you the first question, this whole issue of tenure and the public school system isn't helping things. clearly, the kids are going to charter schools, are scoring higher than the kids going to public schools. charter works better, am i wrong? >> that's why new york is going after charter schools. >> also, we're forgetting to talk about parental involvement. the reason i started reading the newspaper, knew about politics, is my dad had an assignment starting in the third grade, i had to read the paper and pick out two articles to discuss before dinner. >> why is that funny? >> it's great. >> this is important to us and we want you to learn about it. >> families caring about america's history instead of being ashamed of it. look at this newsweek, 1,000 citizens to take the official

citizenship, 29% could pass it. >> my parents made me learn how to make their drinks. when i dad came home, i had a scotch on the rocks. >> for real? >> yeah. >> how much scotch? >> two fingers. >> my problem was my father came home withçó a whole bottle dran before he got there. i don't know, by the way, i am for competency tests for teachers. i think the idea of a tenure, automatically you get these jobs, i don't agree with that. there's a lot of problems with that, and i think charter schools are fine, too, but how much concentration are we doing on math and science in america, very little, right? >> maybe the teachers don't like it so they don't concentrate on it either. but you can't argue with results. we're sliding. meanwhile, the public schools are failing compared to the private -- both private schools and charter schools, so if one system works, why are we throwing so much money and protecting the one class that is failing at the risk of the other ones failing. >> you're talking about mostly

inner city schools. >> not just that. in the suburbs, i can bet you a student will know more about global warming and gender relations than economics, mathematics, or english. >> or history. also about molly and how to roll a joint. >> okay, there you had to ruin the almost perfect block, bob. >> cersorry. >> perfect. >> started off in a great way. besides the cup that spilled. >> my apologies. >> this whole thing was rim full. >> let's see how we can top that, right? you never know. ahead on "the five," jimmy fallon made his debut as host of the tonight show last night, and he kicked things off with a little zinger. >> i'm jimmy fallon, and i'll be your host for now. of course, i wouldn't be here tonight if it weren't for the previous tonight show hosts so i want to say thank you to steve allan, jack parr, johnny carson, jay leno, conan o'brien, and jay leno. >> we're going to tell you what we thought of the first show

coming up. also, will democrats denyi obamacare cost them in november? that debate when "the five" returns.

president obama's had a hard time getting young people -- more coffee. sorry. it's all over the chair. obama has a hard time getting young people in america to buy his health care plan, so now he has a new approach, telling them obamacare is just a part of life. >> we'd like to encourage more young people to sign up. they can find good options for less than their cable bill, less than their cell phone bill. and it's just part of growing up. >> nancy pelosi trying to convince americans obamacare is something our founding fatherses risks their lives for. >> law is very sound policy. to go back to our founders once again, they sacrificed it all

for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. this bill, the affordable care act, is about a healthi yier li the liberty to pursue your happiness. that's solid policy, and that is the mandate is central to that. >> so greg, obamacare, signing up, just a part of, you know, rite of passage, growing up? >> growing up is a part of growing up. independence is a part of life. dependence is the anti-life. why does obama applaud your weakness? helpless americans are controllable ones. the scariest sound a liberal politician can hear is when you say, we don't need you. he wants you to need him because it isn't what the founding fathers sacrificed for. if they were alive, they would kill themselves, after hitting times square. >> how does somebody say, and the white house has done this, too, with ronald regan, saying he would have been for this, or he couldn't have won today's

republican party. what gives them the right to rewrite history? >> i have no idea. do you realize what nancy pelosi said at the end of the sound bite. the mandate is central to that, when she's talking about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. mandate is the opposite of liberty. liberty implies freedom, freedom to choose. mandate implied no freedom. i can't believe she uttered those. >> but you kind of can believe them. >> it's ridiculous. politicians, ask bob, politicians who say whatever they want whenever they want and no one calls them on it, but thank goodness we're calling her. just quickly, james madison actually had a comment, i can't remember the exact comment, but he alluded to the fact that laws shouldn't be so complex that they are too complex to understand, they shouldn't be passed that way. meanwhile, nancy pelosierse her own words, we need to pass it to find out. >> you're in luck because lynn cheney has a book coming out, i think the beginning of april or

may, on james madison. i'll get you a copy. >> the odd couple. >> did you use a cleanser? what is that? >> clorox. >> coffee and clorox is a very good smell. >> i'm getting high off that. >> i want to play the sound bite and get kimberly and bob to comment. this is from secretary of health and human services kathleen sebelius. >> there is absolutely no evidence, and every economist will tell you there is any job loss related to the affordable care act. i know that's a popular myth that continues to be repeated, but it just is not accurate. >> bob, if that's the case, if kathleen sebelius were right, why, then, did the administration delay the employer mandate for another year, prauz presumably they were concerned about the implementation and the effects on the economy, right? >> i think a lot of us think it's the effects on the election. let's be honest. this is becoming -- every time i see another thing happen with this, i say to myself, okay, i'm

back in my campaign manager role. this is what i would do. having said that, i think sebelius -- however you pronounce her name, sebelius, this was an outlier, we jump on the cbo and give it a god-like aura about it. i don't think that you would probably see many more jobs lost as a result of obamacare if you didn't have obamacare. i think people don't like their jobs. if they had a chance to do something else, they would do it. so i'm not defending that. i think -- i just have a hard time seeing how they figured out statistically, 2 million people will be out of work. >> do you work with anybody here -- do you know anybody in your life who doesn't like their job? >> sure. >> really? >> oh, my gosh. >> tell us who? >> out here in the street. >> that's no one's choice to make. by the way, when sebelius said no jobs were lost, she was bragging about herself. >> one job that should be lost. >> on the public communications standpoint, when a administration seems this out of touch with what other people are

at least perceivinperceiving, d think it undermines president obama's credibility for them to at least admit there could be some concerns for the economy since it seems to be everybody bu but the administration is saying that? >> yeah, this is why they have no credibility. because it's such a bold-faced lie. such a disconnect with the truth. this is what bothers me. it's one thing to talk about dreams for america and fundamentally changing america and making it a fair place for everybody. the problem is they have done the exact opposite. they have cost people coverage, cost people jobs. they made a deep and lasting unfortunate impact on the economy, and now it's not an intangible they're selling. americans know, because the numbers are there, whether bob and others like them want to admit it, the numbers are there to show the damage from what they have done, and now they want to continue to sell us other products they don't know what they're doing with, whether it's immigration or something

else. >> do you want to tell bob what the cbo said today? >> that's right, 600 economists -- >> by the way, cbo scored obamacare before it was a law. remember when it was a bill and cbo scored it? all you leftists were like, look, it's not going to cost a dime, but you quoted the cbo. >> one of the things we're discussing is the democrats campaign idea about how they're going to take this and turn it into a positive. they're not going to turn it into a positive. can they blunt it? yes. in a lot of polling and focus groups, they found first, a majority of americans, if it could be fixed, would like obamacare. se second, they think republicans have no idea what they're doing. >> they have proposed something. so say you don't like it, but when the democrats now because their polling is concerning to them, when now they say they're willing to fix it, what are they proposing to fix? >> that's the whole point here, right? >> they don't have anything. >> i don't think there's any way some one bill could fix

everything here. some things need to be fixed. look, democrats are fighting for survival here. and they're going -- >> it's their own fault. they have created their own doomsday. >> we use the word lie around the table -- >> that's a lie, bob! >> liar, liar, pants on fire. >> the inherent contradiction is she said no jobs are lost, but a couple weeks ago, the lost jobs were good. so that's a contradiction. >> because you could be free. >> by the way, this bleach -- >> this smell. >> this smell is also notes of a moldy mop. >> we have to get out. >> tonight show -- >> i'm trying to read it. >> the tonight show transition is complete. jimmy fallon took over for jay leno last night. we'll show you the highlights and tell you what we thought next on "the five."

okay, welcome back to the fastest seven minutes on tv, w news, and otherwise. we're getting bigger. three stories, seven minutes, one animated host. jimmy fallon returns to the fastest seven late. the late night host crushed it in his premier as host of the tonight show. celebrities came out to show their support. >> to my buddy who said i would never be host of the tonight show, and you know who you are, you owe me $100, buddy. >> broadway joe namath?

>> fallon is really funny, but he can sing and dance. check out jimmy along' side will smith as they re-enact the history of hip-hop dance. ♪ can't touch this ♪ doing the humpty hump ♪ not unusual to be loved >> all right, we'll bring it

around. greg, did you like the premier? >> i didn't watch it. didn't watch it. they were giving him money. you know who gave him the most money? new yorkers, $20 million to stay here, in tax breaks. think about this. every new business in new york. >> that's okay, right? >> i'm for that, but it shouldn't just be for media. it should be for everybody in new york. you know what i'm saying? people are leaving because of the tax problems here. but they gave him $20 million, to somebody who wasn't even leaving. >> somebody get the mop again. >> dana, your thoughts? >> i didn't stay up to watch it. i was watching ice dancing and that was riveting. we did win gold in that. i like that i don't have to stay up to watch the highlights. i can watch them on "the five" every day. it's incredible, the amount of attention. >> is there some conspiracy? are they paying us? we ran two minutes of this show on "the five." are we getting cutbacks? >> the fastest seven minutes. >> so here's the deal. i still incredibly love jay

leno, but jimmy doesn't need me. he's got so much love from so many people, and all those hundred dollar bills. >> i watched it and i agree completely. he crushed it. it was a terrific performance. >> that's what the post said. >> big numbers, too. amazing first-night ratings. he beat jay leno, if i'm not mistaken. paramount studios is set to release a biblical themed film starring russell crowe. here's a clip. >> we build a vessel to survive the storm. we build an ark. >> he ended everything. >> beginning. beginning of everything. >> but faith-based audiences are

concerned with hollywood's mixing of the biblical core message with a biblice themed movie designed to appeal to mass audiences. should films like "noah" be considered biblical or entertainment? >> hollywood is doing it, so i would say this would qualify as entertainment with some threads of, you know, biblical veracity woven in between. >> bob, are you okay with a movie like this where it takes the theme and i guess it expands it for wider audiences? >> yes, i'm all right, but listen to the way they ask the question. this is why it drives me crazy when there's 98% of anything. as a faith-driven consumer, are you satisfied with a bibl llica themed movie out of hollywood that replaces the message with one out of hollywood. >> the call suggests the answer. >> people of faith, and particularly evangelicals say you're going away from the bible, of course not. >> you're okay with the 98%

climate. >> i am, because that one is true. >> dana, and bob makes a good point. they market these movies to people who want to go see a religious movie, and then you get something else. >> you're never going to please everybody, but i think discerning adults can decide if they want to take their children and explain to them if they're concerned what they liked and didn't like about it, but there is something to learn from it. it looks very dark. i hope at the end the rainbow comes out. >> aren't you precious? >> this guy did -- he did "black swan" "requiem for a dream" "pi" these are not uplifting films so it's more spectacle than biblical. do it is bad that i don't believe a guy got all those animals in there. >> i just saw a movie, this is freaking me out, with russell crowe in it. he played basically a devil, a

demon. and now he's noah? >> the same people who say they hate it when they take the baby jesus scenes off public property. they're not based. >> ellen degeneres is having fun with rebel wilson. they may be giving drake, dr dr. dre, and diddy a run for their money. >> i'm so excited about our album. >> so many good tracks. >> baby got back fat. >> yeah. >> for africa. >> yeah, you can really get into that. ♪ watching cats on the internet ♪ ♪ show me that show me that ♪ ♪ watching cats on the internet ♪ >> okay, dana, i have to go to you first on this one. >> yes, you may. i love ellen degeneres. i'm a rap expert.

i thought they did an okay job. >> okay. >> i prefer to watch dogs on the internet rather than cats, but no. cute. i like ellen degeneres a lot. >> you are so diplomatic. >> i like the time she it the special and she said you're running along and your trip and then you want to keep walking. it was very funny. >> bob, i know you researched this extensively. >> i don't have a clue what this is about. can i get one fast thing before i get so many e-mails and tweets. what i said about the nativity scene, it was not bibl llically based in the sense that all three wisemen were not there, you'll see it's not -- but we want to see it there, so we bring it together, and it's beautiful. >> and the other thing is they're not that small. >> right. >> or stiff. >> oh, my gosh. >> baby jesus, the manger skeenl, or ellen degeneres. >> i love baby jesus. love baby jesus, and i love the black adidas track suits.

feeling that. >> we'll leave it here. ahead, chaos in caracas, venezuela. they're being shot while protesting big government for freedom. where are shaun pen, danny glover? hiding in hollywood, i guess. we'll be back on "the five."

so, venezuelan government has blocked twitter from showing pictures as protesters rally against its impoverished nation. three protesters are dead as the country's president banned demonstration and expelled u.s. officials. this sounds like a really intense political thriller, you know, one directed by oliver stone and starring sean penn, if that movie were about america.

but since it's venezuela, they're absent. perhaps they're still nursing hangovers from hugo's funeral. all evil stuff, at least in movies. any actor would love to play the heroic resister, but in real life, never mind. after all, both penn and stone eulogized chavez and defended his corrupt government. no surprise their politics are as disposable as their girlfriends. a cause is a drink you toss aside as you get bored, as you gal avant to the next premier. what about the poor who are ignored in the name of the greater good. penn looked away because if he looked socialism in the face, he would see his next role. which leads to venezuela's shortages. no food, no supplies, no toilet paper. maybe that's why stone and penn split. when you're that full of crap, you go where the sharmen is.

so kg -- >> i knew it, any time it's something dirty, you come to me. >> i wasn't going to talk to you about that. about the toilet paper, how could a country not have toilet paper? what does it say about the system? >> what does it say about the russian olympics. they don't have it, either. >> capitalism equals toilet paper. >> it seems to me like a basic human right -- >> like obamacare. >> exactly. >> i get it, there are trees there, but toilet paper is better. >> but venezuelans are suffering, and there's plenty of money in the country, but it's in the hands of avy few. they have a real situation on their hands now that chavez is gone, and the one in power is not the president, it's the general. >> eric, this is a crazy oil rich nation. how can -- if you had to explain to a 15-year-old how could something so wealthy be so

impoverished, what would you say? >> i was going to say that. in your monologue, no food, no supplies, no toilet paper, but a boat load of oil. they should be a wealthy, wealthy nation. it should be around $40,000 or $50,000 because of this. in 1973, they nationalized the oil industry. they pushed everybody out, pushed businesses out, and what socialism does, it takes business. it crushes business and makes government business, and then the corruption takes over. so a few people get extremely wealthy. you want to talk about income inequality. the few dictators are boat load rich -- >> they're billionaires, and the rest are poverty stricken. >> they produce 3 billion barrels of oil a day. they should be like saudi arabia, but they're not because of corrupt socialist government. >> because of socialism. >> it's true. you can't blame the cbo on that. >> where is sean penn now? >> i know. >> i have no idea.

could we talk about this for a second? the opposition leader, lopez, who was -- turned himself in. there was an arrest order out for him. this guy, maduro, the president, is far worse than chavez ever was. they have cut off the internet. they have done away with all -- you can't get paper, not toilet paper, but paper to print opposition magazines and newspapers. they shut that down. it is becoming not a socialist country. a totalitarian country. that's very dangerous in the heart of the western hemisphere. >> it always kind of was. >> it's a natural progression from socialism. power in the hands of a very few that become very wealthy. >> what is with the pattern of celebrities only lionizing left wing thugs and they clam up and leave when everything goes south. we can go back in history to pete seeger, all these people split when the crap hits the fan. >> i think it has something to do with they look at what's

happening in venezuela now, and their view and their vision of what socialism would look like, they think, oh, they're just not doing it right. >> right, yeah. >> if they were -- that it could be done better, but a utopia only exists in fiction. these guys live their lives in fiction. they make their money doing things, acting out fictional things. i wanted to say, access to a free media and to the internet, to television news, all sorts of diverse opinions is the only way to guarantee a country to be able to fight for their own freedoms to make their own decisions. and america should be helping them rather than just saying they are concerned. that's what we said. >> real quick, about sean penn. i will say this on his behalf. he's one of the few people who didn't abandon haiti. he goes back and tries to help the people. otherwise, he's enjoying a personal life with charlize. >> a lot of people do that in haiti. >> sure, he said where he is.

>> to bob's comnltd. think about this, give me one socialist government that ever wo worked. name one. >> france. >> socialist. >> that's what -- you keep throwing the word socialist around. >> you're going to say there's no capitalism in france? >> of course, there is, but it's side by side. >> i have to go, i'm getting yelled at. a surge in the number of millty members on food stamps.

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should america's heroes be on food stamps? new data shows the number of troops on government assistance is growing at a faster pace than the general population. around $104 million worth of stamps were redeemed at military commissaries in 2013. that's a 5% increase from 2012 and almost double that in 2009. all right, eric, since you're the one always jumping on food stamps and the growth in food stamps, do you think we should cut back the military's use of food stamps? >> no, i think they should raise the base salary. the base is $18,000, well below the poverty line. jack that up. by the way, that's only $8.75 per hour. is president obama concerned about raising the minimum wage

of federal contractors over $10? he hasn't mentioned the military. maybe he should start there. meanwhile, we spend a trillion dollars on a stimulus package that got us no jobs, didn't do a damn thing for us and our military has to use food stamps. their priorities are backwards. >> i would venture to say the defense budget, i agree, they could raise their pay, but it's loaded with corruption and crap. >> that's where you find corruption? not in medicare, not in medicaid, not with obamacare? >> with the beltway bandits, you don't think there's corruption there? >> i don't know. we should probably get everyone else in. >> sorry. >> enlisted pay has always been bad. it's not good enough. maybe that's something somebody should talk about. but this year, the military was due a 1.8% raise that president obama unilaterally decided to make it 1%. so there's that. in addition, the administration has signaled this year dod is set for more cuts. maybe not to the enlisted men, but it did include commissaries, and cuts to commissary.

so the sequester has a lot of consequences, and republicans and democrats who support it have a lot to answer for, if they don't want their troops to have to use food stamps. >> they get rid of that, that would be one thing. ia think we need these high-priced planes with two engines? >> we're not talking about that. >> of course, we're not talking about that, because you don't want to talk about the military industrial complex. >> i want to talk about it all, but people here, they're not joining the military to be the 1%. they're doing it out of passion and heart and love for this country. and we should reward their patriotism, their dedication, and the sacrifice of their sure they can provide for their families the basic necessities of life that the rest of us enjoy. >> absolutely. the budget, and the defense department could handle a decrease in the pay. greg? >> if this is evidence of the obama recovery, could you imagine what the obama recession would look like?

we would be eating snakes. >> all i can say it's amazing that food stamps are corruption all the way up until you get there. >> nobody is discussing that military people start out below the poverty line. >> i agree with that. that's why you don't need to have these high-priced aircraft carriers. >> then they should have a conference and they should decide it, and members of congress should vote on it. >> i agree with you. absolutely. "one more thing" is up next. >> thank you.

i thought you said i was up. i'm sorry. >> bob, i said you're up first. it's your "one more thing." >> i am sorry. >> do over. it's time for "one more thing." bob. >> thank you. okay. this is a really serious deal. the number of clowns is diminishing in america big time. >> no, they're not.

>> the clowns of america international is reporting that the number of people signing up to learn to become clowns is plummeting because they're going on to do other jobs. this guy said, clowning is not cool anymore. they want to go on to high school and college. don't worry if you're a barnum and bailey fan. the big circus still has the clowns, but if you want a clown for the birthday, you have to ask me. >> bob is available. >> raise their prices. it's supply and demand. >> greg, you're up next. >> greg. >> anyway, it's time for greg's medical tips. when you have a winter cold, remember when you take the nighttime cold medicines factor in what you have ingested before hand. so if you're taking robitussin dm after you have two glasses of wine and a half an ambien, do not be surprised if you call your coworkers late at night and telling them they hate your sweater and then denying you ever did that. >> who would do that? >> i have no idea, you drug

addict. >> then she threw up. >> you outed her. >> what a power -- >> i had a bad night. i'm better. >> we better hurry up. >> okay, i had a -- we don't have the graphic anymore, but the dreams of my five. i wanted to share this dream with you. so sometimes people that you work with, they show up in your dreams. i was at my core fusion workout and i forgot a sock, and i needed to get a sock, and the owner opens the door and cumbers unher hair, and they said, hi, s kimberly, and i was like, everyone knows her, and they said come in the class. and she said, no, mama needs to get a new piece of cheese, and then megyn kelly walks through to tape a christmas special you were involved in. bob, eric and i weren't involved in the show, but there was greg. he said, do i really have to do this? which actually was the most real part of the dream. it was amazing bizarre.

this was the night before. >> okay, let eric get in here. >> very quickly, part of the global warming thing, a couple things. look at this. look at his face. he loves the snow. also, two marines at quantico, tim lewis and marine reynolds at quantico, look at the sculptor they made. that's beautiful. >> oh, your sculpture is really good. i have mt. snowmore. this is courtesy of dana from her mom. minnesota man had to wait for theize to really freeze up, and then he did the whole sculpture of mt. rushmore in the snow. i think it's very, very, very cool. >> no ob >> it is wednesday february 19th. a 10-year-old girl playing outside of her house snaged by a stranger. that stranger in custody, but no

sign of the child. the latest on the search now spanning three states. >> snow and ice trapping a car on the tracks as a train barrels toward it. the women behind the wheel unable to escape in time but what happened next is a real miracle. >> cars, how long gm knew about the danger and kept quiet. ♪ >> we are waking you up this morning with those three stories and a lot more ahead. you are watching "tocks afox & first". i am ainsley earhardt.

>> an amber alert spanning three states as police search for a missing missouri girl. >> 10-year-old haley owens abducted in front of her house in the middle of the afternoon. kelly wright is here with the latest. >> good morning ainsley and heather. this can be described as a very brazen act. it happened around 4:45 late afternoon. a little girl plucked from in front of her own home. police quickly responding and even getting a suspect in custody. they even tweeted suspect has vehicle located in south springfield, abducted girl remains missing. the big question now is where is halil hailey owens? an amber alert has been extended to oklahoma and kansas.