i have a new poll up there too for you to vote on. gretawire.com. good night from washington. -- washington, d.c. tonight on "red eye." >> coming up on "red eye," double dutch, childhood game or communist recruitment tool? the debate too nonsense cal for special report. and is president obama excited for have a party with your bay day on november 16th? >> yay, that's why november is so important. yay. >> and finally, have cats discovered a portal to another dimension? no. none of these stories on "red eye" tonight. >> poor cat. let's welcome our guests. she is so hot that smoky the bear wants her dead. who can blame him? she killed his family. i am here with joanne nosuchunsky. and he is the scrany ghost of

blythe danker. it is andy levy. and if quinten tarantino made a "sesame street" movie he would play burt. and he worked at a think tank. i would rather see him in a dunk tank, aim right, ladies? daily beast columnist, michael moi fan han. -- moynahan. >> a block, the lede, that's the first story. me and lou dabbs are out on the yacht. babes everywhere. wish you were here. >> he gave up paltrow for poultry. it is time for another edition of the segment that has america talking about stuff and things. >> gwenyth paltrow is right. >> she is. sensitive rocker and cuddle freak chris martin has gone back to eating meat after a split from the blonde vertical

cricket, gwenyth paltrow. the cold play singer who won 6 jest vegetarian alive in 2005 beating a raccoon broke the news in a bbc radio interview. >> you are a vegetarian, of course? >> not really. >> what do you mean, not really. >> i eat meet. i eat meat. then i changed. i thought you should be able to eat something you can kill. otherwise it will be some kind of a headline. could you kill a fish? i wouldn't like it, but i probably skew, so i will eat a fish. >> murderer. paltrow, his ex, hasn't eaten meat in 20 years. a habit she picked up from leonardo dicaprio. paltrow and martin broke up 10 months ago and martin's music has suffered greatly. take a loo. -- take a look. ♪

♪ >> best ever. meanwhile, paltrow has found a new boyfriend who is just as sensitive as chris martin. i believe we have tape of him. >> i hope he is okay. sam, this whole chris martin revelation about eating meat,

this was to punish his ex, right? this was him saying you are no longer in my life. >> it doesn't even make sense to me, the logic, you can only eat stuff you can kill. i can kill a baby, but i still prefer a cow. gwenyth was making a lot of household decisions. i'm sure it wasn't his decision to name the baby apple. she is one of those we are not eating meat anymore couples. >> you know why he named her apple? you can't kill an apple. he was afraid they would kill the baby and you can't kill an apple. >> do you think -- when there is a break up do you think there are problems there? do you think she cares about his diet? she is banging ago a teres now. >> is she? >> i don't know. it is something i threw out. >> i think it is a headline. it will happen, she is banging

ago a teres. says who? the man on fox news? it is incredible what you come out with. they called it like some conscious decoupling or something? i don't think that is working. he said i don't even know why we are talking about this. he is clearly trying to get her goat. but i hope it means he abandons all of the idiotic views. he had a bunch of them. >> i want to see him become a big game hunter. >> she like ted nugent. >> yes, ted nugent and become a hard core republican, a scary one. andy, should martin have to give up his world sexiest veg tear a yen crown? >> well it is a tie between absolutely nobody and that sucks. i love his quote. he said i was vegetarian for quite a longtime, but for

various reasons i changed. let me translate. i was vegetarian a longtime, but now that i am not around that shrewd 24/7 i can now enjoy a burger. >> joanne, it is not often you break up with somebody. it is usually the other way around. have men ever gotten back at you in ways like this? she and i used to go on a tandem bicycle and i set fire to her tandem bicycle? >> you are working something out right now. >> did you ever feel like you burned down a tandem bicycle store? has anybody ever done that a? >> the next question would be -- where did the tandem bicycle without seats touch you? >> i would need a doll to show you. joanne, he is available. would you stoop that low to be his rebound? >> i love burgers. i would get a burger with

him. that's what this really is. a lot of time what you eat and your lifestyle habits reflect the emotion you are in. he is obviously dating someone who works in the meat industry. >> there you go. >> that's a whole mess of people that could be. i'm assuming it is a woman who likes cheese burgers. >> maybe somebody dating -- might be dating somebody who works at a fast-food restaurant. >> maybe somebody from the tyson family. they have a chicken factory. >> they do, and it is a delightful one. >> his music doesn't sound like he eats meat. >> maybe they changed the sound of the next record, right? it could be a hit. >> his song is strictly vegan. his music is strictly vegan. that's so true. the segment is called gwenyth is right. i don't know why. everyone says she is wrong. >> there are some things you can't be con terror yen about.

contrarian about. >> he is marying a targarian. i don't know what that means, but i assume it has something to do with the fact that a british couple had a game of thrones thrones-themed wedding. enjoy, nerds. ♪ >> they should have killed each other like they did in the real thing. the happy weird owes won a contest sponsored by uk movie streaming service for the all expenses paid ceremony which was free. it took place at east north castle. the rest of the wedding party had other characters from the hit hbo show.

it included frodo the hobbit. here is how i spent the fourth of july. >> i don't know what you learn from that fire safety video. >> he has lost his mind. >> here, give a doll a sparkler, and of course it will catch on fire. dolls are not alive. they don't move. that didn't teach me anything at all. sam, what do you think of this? do you think they should have a "game of thrones" divorce when it all ends? >> i think it is great. congratulations women from new jersey. there is now a wedding where

women wear more make up than you. >> i am not uh febded -- offended at all. >> there is incest on "game of thrones" and a wedding is a family affair. throw it out there. if it doesn't work out say i thought this was an authentic wedding. >> that's true. i demand to make out with my sister. >> are you throwing to me? >> it is game of thrones u. >> it is true if they decide to do coigula. >> i am going to sponsor that. we created a contest, america. >> money -- moynahan, should they stuff stop or continue? >> i am so happy you are asking a question like that. i have never seen "game of

thrones" and apparently everybody gets killed at the wedding? >> they do. >> i wish i am a tarzarian and best of look. he looked like russell brand. >> he did. i watched the first season and got over it. what it is is kill, kill, kill, sex scene. kill, kill, kill, sex scene and end. >> if they are trying to beathon particular there were not enough boobs. i have only seen a few episodes and they were great, but there was a lot of nudity. if you have a cousin who gets drunk very easily at family functions and likes to take their clothes off, this is the wedding for you and your family. >> and they did have a little person. >> i heard a baby in the background. >> that was -- in that station they should try to get a little person to add to the authenticity.

you probably think this is the greatest thing ever. >> are you upset you were not invited? are you a a ngling for an invitation? >> only if they keep it real. >> speaking of keeping it real it is lady caitlin and hoder. the only one you pronounced correctly was the one not from "game of thrones," frodo. >> he was the godfather. >> the brother. >> frodo. >> i agree. let nerds be nerds. there was no way this was as over the top as kim and kanye wedding. it was probably less of a joke. the only thing is it didn't have jayden smith in a white batman costumes flitting around. >> let's go around 9 -- the table. if you had to choose a theme wedding -- and i know jo, you will never get married. but in this off chance what

kind of theme would it be? tv show? movie? >> it would be napa. >> the auto parts store? >> no, no, no. it would be wine and, like, you know, i'm on the countryside and there is wine. >> snooze. >> sam? >> a prenup-themed wedding. >> that's pretty good. andy? >> it would have to be an "entourage" theme. >> all of your bros and show up in a nice car with suicide doors. exactly. >> that would be rad. >> who would be turtle? i would be your turtle. >> it wouldn't be the first time. >> i was thinking maybe rock the charles gutten show. he was a garbage man from baltimore. there is so much color and culture in that. >> he was a murderer. >> i am just winging it. i am already married. >> i would have done a titan a nick theme -- titanic theme,

but not tell anybody. where are we? do we prefer a certain fur? shelter workers say black dogs are not adopted as quick as the lighter litters. is this racist? >> fire that guy. black dogs syndrome as it is known in shelters and at my apart a meant is apparently very real. there are a number of reasons dark, furry dogs take longer to find homes. people find images of black dogs scarier and their faces look less expressive. they are afraid the dogs will shed on the furniture. black dogs look older or boring. are these factors just a cover for what is really at play here? that is unbridled racism. let's look at the length some dogs have to go to get noticed.

>> wow. >> i told you. first gay marriage. what's next? michael, do you have a dog and what color is it? >> i do have a dog. >> i bet it is white. >> it is. it is. it is white. and it has a flop of blonde hair and wears a small arm band and only speaks german. i didn't even know dogs could speak german. i didn't even know it was german. >> weird it only begs with one paw. >> consistently. when andy came over he ruthlessly attacked him. i didn't even tell him his name was levey. it was a sense. >> it is actually funny because i have a white dauchson. >> there is no such thing. >> it is called a dapple. >> you know what that is? that is precious. what a is that a?

it is a dapple. it is a white dauchson. shut up. you make me want to barf. >> i don't get paid to come on this show. >> i want money from you. >> i am bullied and i hate crime. >> do you think racism is a real season black dogs lange -- languish in shelters? >> i saw a black lab walking and a lady clutching her purse. >> that's terrible. joanne, if that is your real name, do people want to look like their dogs and so there are more white people in the country so they want white dogs like the racist money gnaw han. >> we dye our hair? dye the dog's hair. >> you want the black dog to look like michael jackson?

>> we put them in clothes and people go to all lengths to change the appearance of their precious animals. who i blame is the media. if you think about it, lassie and old yeller and even 101 dalmatians, mostly white. we have been bombarded of these images of these fair haired pup pup -- puppies. >> true. i was raised on benji. >> he is dominican. >> yeah, he was dominican. and then there was run joe run. do you remember run, joe, run. and what about the bionic dog? that was a german shepherd. rine tin-tin. what was rine tin-tin? collie? >> dead before i was born. >> that was a dog? >> it was a drink. >> cats. who faces more discrimination to black cats?

oh don't cross a black cat. >> i had a black cat in l.a. it was cool. the thing about black dogs is they make me think of the omen. i mean, come on. who is a good little hell hound? who is a good messenger of sa a ta a n? you are. who wants to wake up with that staring at them. >> i have had that. >> but that was a mask and it cost me a pretty penny. >> i think we have beaten this into the ground. not the dog, the story. coming up, this gunk. someone spends $4 million on a bed? that is too much. i got mine for free off the curb. bulldog: it's true! i am a bundle of talent!

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it is not even a rhyme. all right, using global patent data and the research reports, tom mat routers compiled the world in 2025. >> this is a buddy of his. >> they wrote a report, and the world in 20 with -- 2025 and what will happen in the future? solar power will be the most abundant source of energy. electric planes will fly and an internet of things will connect everything and everyone will roller blade to work. the most exciting frightening prediction is that by that year they will test teleportation. they won't be able to say we can teleport humans, but by extrapolating research it is

likely that we will be able to tele port certain kinds of matter in a decade. for more on these innovations let's go to our senior technology correspondent. ♪ >> that will be you in 20 years. sam, do you believe these predictions are correct? >> i hope they are correct. i want to be myself. that's what i want to live for. it will be another fight with my girlfriend, but i feel she will see my account and be like where were you last night? she says it says right here you went to thailand. >> you go wherever. michael if you could teleport

if you could? 4* it senselessly kills you. >> what are you talking about? are you making fun of my -- i had a long day. >> come on, you are a news station. i am not believing it. you are old enough to remember the jetsons and the promises that were made and the flying cars. >> we were only allowed to watch white cartoons. >> were there others? >> fat albert. >> try to make a point. >> talking about white cartoons. >> i am trying to keep this interesting. >> so tommy reauters, i don't

think it will happen because i don't believe in the botone technology. it has bt been tested. >> joanne, does the future scare you? >> yes. getting older and robots. i am terrified of the future. we can clone animals and farm them and sell them in supermarkets. >> i know, scary. >> tk teleportation is the next step. but it will happen. >> you will have the animal delivered to your doorstep. >> it will come down to us. teleportation separates you from your confidence. you can't express that you have been killed. your teleported self-is having 6 with your wife. robbing your bank accounts. say are you sam and you are about to be teleported to go to thailand. as this happens you are

experiencing pain you say i am dying, i am dying! and then all of a sudden there he is going -- and then he tells his friends he is actually original sam, but he is not original sam. he is a different sam. >> greg, you ignorant slut. when you take a computer file and move it from one to the other, are you killing the file? no, you are moving it to another drive. you are not being destroyed. you are being converted to another form, matter to energy and from energy to matter. >> you are still you. >> you are not, you are not. you are actually going like this to -- this is a medical term. >> i hate when that happens. >> i have seen star trek. that's not how it works.

>> it is a physical farce. >> it is gash shoes matter. >> it is gash shoes matter. you are mr. smarty pants atheist. you just accused me of not making a point. does tele pour station approve or disprove the existence of a soul? >> it is the nonexistence. >> have you the same consciousness? >> it can be. >> have you ever been teleported? >> yes. >> i am the most honest. >> greg gutfeld died in 2009. >> you opened up the next day in central new jersey with no pants and a tattoo of shirley temple.

>> the fact it you may be right and i can't remember when these things happen. i can't sit for a week. >> at they are public. >> it is public tele pour station. are we done with this topic? >> it was smart talk. >> the point is it is a philosophical question. >> go and do something to your body i can't say. but do it to yourself is what i am saying. coming up, dogs go to fat camp. real dogs. that wasn't me being texas. first, a you word -- a word from your sponsor. >> party like it is your beret day because it kind of is. act now and we will throw in a 366 candle for leap day. thanks every day is your birthday candles.

she made her bread by not making her bed. tracy emmons work of art titled "my bed" comes with stained sheets and cigarette butts. i have been there, that bed. this week it sold for $4.25 or 6 million pounds in london. the 1998 conceptual piece is a self-portrait representing her bout with depression.

while the buyer remains anonymous, my guess it is someone with a lot of money and into dirty under wear. it narrows it down to half of our staff. i have the names of the people on from last night. cross that out. sam, if stained sheets are art, you must be pablo picasso. >> it is a problem. i get she is glad she didn't put this on craigslist. $4 million because it was a depressed period of your life? that's how good artists have it. no one is paying that kind of money for my depression. >> maybe if you formed them into something. she took lemons and made lemonade, michael. who can blame her? you are living basically day-to-day. >> full of cigarette butts and empty bottles.

she says "i feel sad and it feels like a praying -- fragment of time." when the bid came out she was whooping and sharing. if you have ever seen tracy speak on television other than the incoherent drunken times, she is the dumbest woman on the planet. it totally collapses everything we believe about modern art. maybe i am too dumb to get it. you can see her dock and she is incoherent. in 1999 one of the guys i think cleaned it up. this is garbage. 4.1 million for garbage. >> there are maintenance workers who go to stuff and think it is trash and they throw it away and then everybody freaks out. i was there at the tate modern in 2003 and 2004. i don't know when. i was standing there drinking wine with my foot like leaning

against that. people came over and they were insane yelling at me. i was like, what? i was laughing and walked away. not much of a story. if you saw this art work in a man's apartment would you be intrigued? >> i would stick around. if he will spend that amount a of time on a dirty bed, think about how much he would spend on me. i think i am a little more put together. it is weird how art is subjective. beauty is in the eye of the beholder. it means something to someone, but i will never understand why one piece of art that is splattered paint is worth more than a 4-year-old's art a. >> or a monkey art. >> there are technical terms to analyze it, but it is beyond me. >> jeff kunz made a sculpture out of metal balloons. $60 million.

did you like those? >> i do. >> are you disgusting. >> i like the photos of him. google those. >> i shall. andy, here is my theory, if this is what art is, why continue people who are famous just poop, take a crap and freeze it and sell it for minutes. >> you didn't see monument men, have you? >> that's what frames franco does. >> he is trying. >> they suk because because he is james franco -- if you think a messy bed is art and you want to pay $4 million, you are an i idiot. i don't blame her. it is not her fault. it is the people who bought it fault. i am going to do this. th is my next step. >> it is nobody's fault and it is not even conceptual liesing

the piece. whoever bought that just made a lot of money. spent money to make money. >> we are laughing at somebody who bought a dirty bed and it will mean a lot more. if you are interested in buying this cowlick it will be $17,000. next topic, there is an obesity epidemic in this country with our fest. a pest. dogs and cats are overweight causing pet owners to send them to fat camp. most obese pets use personal trainers. this is worse than an unmade bed being sold. there is a five-day fitness camp.: activities include pilates and pogo. is it better which you get food for your pet and then send them to a weight loss

clinic. i am focusing on the law link wents. delinquents. i don't know. i picture -- i picture dogs and when i picture dogs, it is fat dogs. you don't want to see one i have been lay aing on the street with an oxygen tank. >> i like fat dogs. big, fat dogs that lie around and make me feel good. you kwan rest your head. it is a like, giant breathing pillows and fleas. should they go to fat camp or tell them to be comfortable in their own fur. >> i think it has gone too far. another true thing i was walking my dog -- i have done it three times. i walked my dog and they said your dog is really fat. >> would they have said that in frnt of your daughter? >> they did actually say it in

front of the daughter. >> she covered in gravy when i get home. my dog is a doctor so he has a stomach and it is hard for him because he is a comic drag on the ground. we are trying to do something with that. we actually just stop feeding the doing. that's usually what you do. >> you exercise. it is the same a thing. >> yoga. >> it is free. dogs don't know. are they being fat shamed. >> two things. if your pet is happy who cares if it is fat? as long as you are not overfeeding it. feed it the right amount. if it is fat, it is fat. this is for lazy people who don't want to go for a walk.

then i will go and sit on my couch and eat cheat toes. >> it reflects population that is sitting around and do nothing. kids as used to play fetch. get a stick, throw it and and the dog brings it back. it creates a bond. >> i am laughing because it used to be never. >> i gas realized your house boy's name isn't fetch. >> it is more about our culture, sam. >> it is depressing when you see a person jogging with their dog. that wasn't the dog's choice. >> you know what is true? dogs are happiest with a home less person. they don't know he is homeless. they know they are outside all the time and people are petting with you. >> they just want love.

i think it is great and providing jobs for those who leave whatever classes these are and it is great for the economy. it shows you really love your pet because you are spending money. that's what shows a person love. they spend a lot of money. >> spending money shows love. the next go to phrase i will use on "the five" it is great for the economy. no matter what it is. it is an avalanche. think about the trucks and the hospital gear. >> you have to spend gas. >> you have it wrong and he has it right. >> it is the krugman and finally invaded by aliens then we will be able to have an a economy because everybody would be at work fighting the

ale a yens. >> everybody look this up. >> little dog running shorts would be great, but how do they poop? does it matter? we will talk about that for an hour. when we come back, it is pot for poor people. if you haven't purchased it, why not? autographed copy "new york times" best seller.

they will hand out weed to those in need. the city of berkeley, california will require medical marijuana dispense res to give free pot. 2% of the amount they sell each year to low income patients. council member darrell moore explains basically the city council wants to make sure low income, homeless indigent folks have access to their mel marijuana and their medicine.

we think it is the most responsible thing to do in our committee. >> sounds like a jackpot. michael is this a good idea? >> the city council, they always like doing things like declaring war on countries. they passed resolutions against dams in nicaragua. >> and they have sister cities. >> always places that put people in jail for the public enduce ments. >> they don't recognize texas. >> it is anybody and it is these cities that are so concerned. why are there so many homeless people there? >> i am okay with making sure they have access to medication. but you notice homeless people

are smoking weed. >> i went to cal. the reason there are homeless people there is they win over the shop keeper and the business owner. there will be a guy sleeping there pooping on your doorstep, but he wins. the moment you call the council is like he has every right to be there. it drives shop owners crazy. >> if i was a homeless guy the last thing i would want to be is hungry yes, sir. i would get the munchies. >> well, there is the dog. if the dog is fat you can live off that for a few months. >> by the way, i don't condone it. >> that makes one of you. >> joanne, if you lived at berkeley would be be happy if people got free marijuana and you had to pay for your own? >> give a man a a joibt and he will smoke for a day. teach a man how to grow his own pot plant and he will become a lucrative business

owner. >> really these low income patients wish they could promise it for themselves. we are deprives them of their gratification. >> you would know about that. >> he went in a different direction. >> which direction do you want to go? >> he loves that. he said greg, insult me. >> and that was the worst insult ever. >> anyway, is pot really the best drug for people who are trying to find a job or place to live? >> it is keeping them down. you don't want to decrease the motivation for people who don't need it. and a it is good for the economy. b, brerkly's mott -- berkeley's motto is it is a great place to be homeless.

if this is the motto it makes sense. >> this is actually the worst thing you can do to somebody. >> they act like it is helping them and increasing motivation. it doesn't. i never have taken a hit from a gravity bong and been like, it is time to climb the corporate ladder. what a is that networking chronic? >> have to get the resume updated now. >> coming up, burger king goes gay, yay. and do you have videos of animals? send them to fox news.com/red eye. i will still be here when you come back. g?góéj÷ç÷ç

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switch now and add voice and tv for $34.90. comcast business. built for business. last story. that's the last story. >> bk? more like be gay. they are ending bigotry one burger at a time. burger king introduced the proud whopper alt one of their -- at one of their restaurants to have gay pride month. was bk ready? >> what do you think of burger king introducing the proud whopper? >> like it is the gay burger? >> i don't believe in the homosexual lifestyle. >> i think it is a cool idea. i think it is great. >> finally.

>> it is about time. >> do gay people even eat fast-food? >> i blur those guys. the proud whopper is the same as the regular whopper, but it comes with a special message. >> we are all the same. >> that's beautiful. we are all the same inside. will people get it? >> everything is the same on the inside, but it is just the outside. >> she got it. >> i still don't get it. i am empty on the inside. you hate nontraditional coupling . >> disgusted at burger king for ruining the american family. >> and ruining the burger. >> the girl was like, i got it.

>> the guy has a blurred face. >> i know a lot of gay people, a lot of gay people. i live in new york. it is a long story. some time you will understand that. they gave him -- there is so much money. it is a good stereo type. >> there you go. is it -- are very suggesting we eat gay people? >> that's what i got from it. >> that's horrible. >> next will they call it burger queen? how are these people homophobic when you eat something that tears your a>s apart every time you eat it? i love because i am not ready, but the hard core people on the right, i am not eating no gay burger. i'm like, oh it is just a burger. >> joanne, what do you make of

this? a poe -- polygamy burger or satan burger 1234. >> the proceeds are going to college scholarships for the lgbt community. when people come in they are offered the proud whopper or unless i am wrong. >> no, andy is so angry. >> i can't even buy it up. i am steaming. >> as you said you go to a bk and choose between a regular whopper and proud chopper. the only difference is the rapper. if you say it then you hate gays. >> that's what it is. if you don't eat the gay burger, what is wrong with you you? that's amazing. what will they do in february? the black burger?

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hello everyone i'm andrea tantaros along with kimberly guilfoyle, juan williams, eric bolling and greg gutfeld. this is "the five." we hope you had a fantastic weekend celebrating american independence and everything else that makes this country great. filmmaker d'souza worries in his new film "america." >> how do you convince a great nation to author its own destruction. you start telling a n