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tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  July 2, 2017 2:00pm-3:01pm PDT

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asteroids before they get too close to the earth. infinity is a refrigerator sized spacecraft. >> vocals well this is a technique could later be used on more dangerous asteroids. hope they can throw that refrigerator up there to save us! >> that does it for us. we will be back at 6:00 p.m. eastern. we hope you will join us. >> happy fourth! stay with us. tick tick tick. tick tick >> there are drugs for that!
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[applause] >> all right. somebody surveyed the world and the world hates trump. 37 countries, 22 percent have confidence in trump what was obama's number? 64 percent, 49 percent have favorable views of the us under trump versus 64 percent under obama. more trust in vladimir putin then in trump so, the world has lots of faith in us. i say good. i know how we feel about you world! [laughter] you think you are so special? you are a mess! look at yourself earth, you suck! you corner the market in awful economic ideas. violent regimes, jihadist
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themes as we zoom ahead, you, earth, hold us back. you suck!i know that for a fact. i spent 10 minutes this morning googling why the world sucks. this is what i came up with. [video] ♪ ♪ [music] >> that is the world! that is the world. meanwhile, this is us. the united states. [video] ♪ ♪ [music]
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>> i think i have proven the fact that we rule! compared, compared - thank you. compare the world to us. no wonder everyone is trying to come here! there is no line out of america. only in. and i do not blame them. if you see nero vision?♪ ♪ that european music contest? ♪ [video] ♪ [music] >>. [laughter] >> forget the travel ban. we need a music ban! i once ate a puffin in iceland.
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you know what that is? who in god's name eats something that is durable? the world, simplicity dogs, some eat dogs, some each other. taste like chipotle? it is not a good place. but not all of the world blows. there is a -- coming from the netherlands. i enjoy this actress from australia. but the world great improvements, you can think us. we export great ideas hoping to push out the bad. remember world hunger? still a problem but get this - denote the bigger problem is? obesity! yes, according to the research over 2.2 billion people are considered obese. you're welcome that so! [laughter] we did that! we revolutionized farming, distribution and give you
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cheap, non-toxic, wonderful high caloric food! we helped reduce hunger almost to a fault. 2.2 billion obese people and we're not even done yet! [laughter] because there is still many ideas that exist out there and it is our job to replace them with the good stuff. the fake terror. have you ever seen an obese terrorist? now! we need to double the number of obese people stat! but still, the world is dangerous. many people leave their countries fearing for their lives. yet they bring the very things that make their countries are scared. so we don't want that here. we don't want the reason that you left. and neither does president trump. they can come here, but get the check your baggage at the gate. i get what foreigners are at ease with trump more than obama because he is more like america than anyone before him. he is us! more important that he is us on vacation. [laughter] [applause] we demand things, we get loud,
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we do not sit and wait. we snap our fingers, we jingle our change. donald trump does the same thing. hanks is wondering why are there any windows for the pyramids? he is at the great wall thinking, that is not so great! >> finally, he makes us the scarier ones. we just from obama, a typical sitcom dad to a biker from sons of anarchy. [applause] we went from stephen keaton in family ties to the walking dead. obama, he was a pushover and now we got the opposite. and if the world has a problem with it, it is their problem. not ours. [applause] i have to introduce, let's welcome our guest. she is so bright her card is need headlights!
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rasmussen political analyst andy holmes. he is so funny pieces of confetti, joe devito. [applause] >> her print favorite meal - and the cohost -- he ties his shoes with rattlesnakes. former bodyguard -- amy, does this survey of the world where you at all or is this something we should be proud of? >> not even remotely. and thank goodness the president is president of the united states, not of the global order. and that is what we elected. [applause] he went through all of the clips i know she didn't include selfies of katy perry or lena dunham. we had some bad things. >> that is true. you are right. and you know penicillin!
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we did discover penicillin i think.il>> yes, we did. in a petri dish with some mold. >> exactly! but we brought in lena dunham, the penicillin oh my gosh - >> you need penicillin after a dunham selfie. president trump drew a redline about syria and then boom! in the words of rachel maddow. and then again this week issued a warning i do not cross this line and apparently assad listen. >> if the us is so bad why does everyone want to be here? i don't get it! >> here at the traffic only goes one way into the us. but it is a troubling study. we are down in the single digits in north korea. [laughter] >> i think amy
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made an excellent point, donald trump is an interest in any of what obama did. he wants to be the president of the us and if it is too bad for the rest of the world. -- we have work to do here in the us. we're not going to worry about what they think about us in other countries.we can't afford it. he is president of the united states, he represents the american people. >> exactly. [applause] >> the president, it's like president trump is the angry drunk at the end of the bar that you do not mess with. that is kind of refreshing. >> me? >> yes, just like you! >> listen, again, ginobili kept the president of the united states is a likable dude to the rest of the world. i think it is great to have get
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bad people not like you. you mentioned north korea etc. people say some really terrible stuff to me on the internet. then i look at their profile and i am like go me! >> i am glad this piece of garbage doesn't like me. it is kind of like that on a larger scale. >> and is not lower confidence in trump more like comfort over new management. he is the new boss. >> i'm going to stop you there greg. i've been everywhere. i was in a straight when obama was first elected. their prime minister, he said it's a bad day for the world. remember in france?we took away french fries. they have always been jealous of the united states. they have always issues with vs. the only thing is that mainstream is everything is to push what they say about trump
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being horrible. 64 percent. if you have that great in school, the facility, right? >> yes. [laughter] >> so do you know what? if you don't like trump, you are going to tell him. if you do, that is your butt. so they will hate us but if you want to say do you want to come over? yeah. you know we are good. >> exactly. [applause] >> and it was a fantastic you know we are living in reverse world. the world expresses more concern according to media for donald trump than they do about terror. they don't care about venezuela, there are no polls on venezuela with this imploding but there are polls on donald trump because he scares them. thank god he scares appeared okay before we go, the new question in the russian investigation is this. if russia hacked the election, shouldn't president obama have said or done something?
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this is certain to some of the soap opera. >> it was a passionate affair. >> blamed for the russian attack. >> her obsession knew no bounds. >> what a friend from the past threatens to -- >> will their love endured? or will the truth tear them apart? >> honestly, we don't know. >> rachel maddow, obama and the russians. david -- up next, the president, i think he tweeted something this week and no one is talking about it at all. i think we will be first to ♪ ♪ talk about it ever![music] you're saying the new app will go live monday? yeah. with help from hpe, we can finally work the way we want to.
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with the right mix of hybrid it, everything computes. >> he tweeted some rents in the
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press wet their pants. like clockwork the president unloaded on twitter sending the whining world of media into a frenzy. in case you need reminding he tweeted her poorly rated morning show speaks badly of me.
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then how, low iq - along with psycho joe came to mar-a-lago three nights in a row around new year's eve and insisted on joining me? she was bleeding badly from a facelift. i said no! [applause] okay. i think it is kind of harsh until you remember that they nail donald trump daily. >> it is like someone pooping their pants and looking him in saying that is modern art. quincy looks like a bug, a goon, you look at the handshake and look at this, just - what an embarrassment! he is mulling him like an idiot. >> just for the record, we are overly nervous.>> donald trump again being a schlock. >> making a fake cover on a
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magazine himself lying to the country. >> save two other people a life of misery by hooking up. [applause] [laughter] >> that was bad. i i'm kind of bummed out that the president tweeted this because it turns this pair into victims. when all they do is snipe it other people. and they also put out lousy music videos. [video] ♪ ♪ [music] >> what was that? it was like someone auto tuned vomiting. i have heard bitter noise from raccoons fighting in my trashcan! [laughter]
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but hey, at least you have a new name for the band! [applause] anyway, speaking of pooping! danny practically pooped in his pants over donald trump. quincy is a pig. he is physically disgusting to look at. he is not okay. enough is enough! enough is enough with this disgusting, vulgar man. and talk about women that way? >> yeah! meanwhile the rest of america. [video] >> yeah. there are three worlds political world that are upset about this. the media which is - and the rest of the world which is that cute slow feeling like i don't really care about this. we're not as obsessed with the media as they are with
quote
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themselves. they don't realize that trump has a secret weapon they do not have. they don't have dirt on him, he has dirt on them! we have been saying this for decades. the problem is three is a delay while kissing his butt. he has the scoop on them the thing i don't like is as far as insults go, i kick you out of my party because your facelift was bleeding. that is an unbelievable insult! [laughter] kathy griffin wishes that she came up with that insults. so here it is my health care plan. i still think as president you can do both of those. i think it is a lot to ask of people. so, if there was a jumper he just insulted the people then you would say that was a sick - >> what he is saying is facelift is a bad thing. this is america! i plan to get several sunday. [laughter] >> this is not a stranger, he
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is no stranger to this. >> he wasn't insulting her, he was insulting the work! [laughter] >> actually, you know he probably had a better dr.. >> but listen greg, there is a saying in washington that you are only as big as your biggest enemies. so in his case that would be godzilla. [laughter] >> i see a love connection. >> with this tweet he elevated his enemies. if you just ignore them it would be worth punishment. >> i kind of agree with you because i do not think well i don't know, i to ask you though is hard to feel sympathy for these pedestrian status seekers. it's like maybe if it was someone else he was insulting but they always come every
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morning they are media welfare. nobody watches their show. the only reason they are still there is that they invite media guests on their show so they'll never get canceled. >> again he didn't do himself any favors with this tweet because it made, it turned them into victims like you said. it turned them into victims and again, i also kind of do not feel like cosmetic surgeons work holiday weekends. i really don't! so i have some kind of questions there about the accuracy.and when i think to myself, what is this i'm thinking about right now all week long? and what is even happening right now? i totally agree with you, if you're going to tweet this and tweet that, you have to choose between being on rivers of the president is going to be hard. >> but john rivers would have been a great president! the fact that she is dead before this all happened is something we should all be crying about. >> i find it funny how feminists are calling donald trump sectors for treating a
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woman a demand. isn't that what they want? insults know no gender. >> when it comes to dissing somebody, i mean it is all fair. you have been writing on him for a minute. >> yeah. >> and these to be friends. so they were just another cultivation off. i mean - you have to push him there. and then this is why you do not pillchuck with someone you don't break up with. tell your boys like i was in talking to that girl. oh really? does not we told me last night. [laughter] you know what i am saying? >> it is the most codependent relationship. joe and mika and trump. they wanted to consultants that keep the friend. but they want to keep it close because of what the influence to shop at mar-a-lago. >> also they are saying the he
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wasn't like this. he has changed in the past year. like you are hanging out with him and new year's eve ettinger was a writeup about other female anchors blood. he is not changed! what are you talking about? >> that is the biggest point. he dropped his video after the diss, right? his music career is launched. it would have been him, his wife and him watching the video. not everyone is like, he is doing this - they left their vacation to do an interview.i mean - >> i have to tell you, joe you know, they have been accusing trump of being sexist but i don't think joe scarborough is all that innocent. you have something?>> have you seen thompson's wife? >> yeah! >> do you think that she works the pole? >> that is what - will do to your question with that donald trump is off the hook! [applause]
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>> all right. new details on the border wall. okay have a chocolate fountain like the one at golden corral. i swim in that! but first more fake news from fake people. [applause] americans - 83% try to eat healthy. yet up 90% fall short in getting key nutrients from food alone. let's do more. add one a day 50+ a complete multi-vitamin with 100% daily value of more than 15 key nutrients. one a day 50+.
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so i talked to my doctor and he prescribed lyrica. nerve damage from diabetes causes diabetic nerve pain. lyrica is fda approved to treat this pain. lyrica may cause serious allergic reactions or suicidal thoughts or actions. tell your doctor right away if you have these, new or worsening depression, or unusual changes in mood or behavior. or swelling, trouble breathing, rash, hives, blisters, muscle pain with fever, tired feeling or blurry vision. common side effects are dizziness, sleepiness, weight gain and swelling of hands, legs, and feet. don't drink alcohol while taking lyrica. don't drive or use machinery until you know how lyrica affects you. those who have had a drug or alcohol problem may be more likely to misuse lyrica. now i have less diabetic nerve pain. and i love keeping their little feet safe and sound. ask your doctor about lyrica. if you are eligible, you could pay as little as $25 dollars a month. >> live from "america's news
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headquarters" i am eric shawn. the president. with them it is escalating. he posting his own video of him wrestling vince mcmahon with the cnn logo pasted over mcmahon space is that there they're not responding accusing the president of encouraging violence against journalists and saying it is -- and a performance while issuing breaks out. -- 28 people were injured as gunshots rang out during the brief pause in the performance. police believe it was a dispute between rival gangs them have sparked that violence. i am eric shawn. back to "the greg gutfeld ♪ ♪ show". ♪ [music]
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>> a bad run it has been for cnn. kathy griffin and the bloody head. -- getting fired, fake stories followed by resignations. and of course, brian stelter. that's all. just brian stelter. [laughter] whenever i see my get hungry for uncooked pillsbury crescent rolls. [laughter] and now, the secret tapes that prove donald trump right.james o'keefe secretly taped that they russian story was of baloney. now there's more proof of thickness and there is the register! so now sanders criticized the media and got this reaction from a member of the press corps. >> we asked you questions and you are here to provide answers to what you deserve is inflammatory to people all of
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the country who want to see once again the president is right and everyone else here is fake media. and everyone in this room is like trying to do their job. [laughter] >> and nice touch with the chewing gum! [laughter] which they finally this guy? sleeping in an abandoned railcar? all of that is missing, pants made of burlap. or maybe a barrel and suspenders. so what is the proper way to handle the white house press corps? we sent - into the line again to show us how it is done. [video] >> what it is? first question. >> a lot of people are still scared of the nuclear power because of nuclear waste and nuclear plant. >> this is getting boring already. anybody want to talk about "game of thrones"? >> are you concerned about the direction they're going? >> yes!
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they have already veered off of the books way too much. leave it to them to finish the next one step! >> do you know if he shares your view? >> yes i called him, i told him to get writing and he hung up on me. i might go knock down his door and told to finish the books - >> what you just said is inflammatory to people all over the country. >> first off, books are always better. and the only thing inflammatory in this room is your goatee. can we get a quick zoom on that? i think we need independent counsel. even you agree with me. that is horrendous, isn't it? last question. >> talk to me about your plan. it is basically being wanted by many countries across the world. >> ma'am, wasn't fishing for
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compliments but i am in demand all around the world. but i like my job here. # mama there goes that man i am out. [applause] >> nicely done! [applause] >> cyrus, how should the media handle donald trump? >> you know, just keep doing what they are doing! [laughter] >> here is the thing. me personally, i think it is wrong to record anybody without their permission. >> yeah. pricing of the wikileaks stuff. i'm dead against it. within the other side of it, you're saying the stuff. and then when it happens to be truth it is hard to not look at that and be like 12, cnn, you are clearly pushing your agenda. and cnn is different because they are supposed to be in the middle. >> but do we really need and
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undercover video for that? >> like in this documentary and said cyrus how are you doing? i would be like - [laughter] >> i agree with you. >> but donald trump has a right to say fake news. >> a agreement you need and undercover video to expose that cnn has a bias? you can just see it on air every day when you turn it on. 93 percent of cnn coverage of donald trump is negative. that is nine and 10 stories they do in donald trump which they do all day long. >> in the other ones against melania trump. [laughter] >> they have all of the bases forward. >> were americans that don't look at this, a quick video when you're looking at facebook, yes, it is big news! >> i kind of agree. the methods bother me but the
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other senses the left has been doing that for years with the stimulus and consumer reporting.to know the right is - >> someone has been bugged by james o'keefe. [laughter] >> i have said things about donald trump that agree with their positive, things are negative but have never said something knowing in my heart and my head that i think it is --. if you are in this position and you actually have the honor of being on t.v. to talk and share your opinions if you use it that way? your garbage! that is a disgusting thing to do. because it is very important. i take it serious. if i change my mind about things and look at things in a different light, never say this is a trip i want use it to gain something. it is disgusting. quest this is an important lesson joe, the consistency of being on t.v. and off tv, it should be exactly the same but
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there are people in the business that do not do that. >> what what do they say that even they admitted it is mostly bs? we have to ask 100 percent! aim higher people! >> that's right, journalism is a different profession. you can be dishonest, but still be pretty good with a wrench. but you cannot be a liar as a journalist. because your whole reason for doing that is to find some sort of truth.however you want to present it. they just don't have that option and now they're wondering why people do not trust them. it is not because donald trump is coming after them. it's because you have been lying to us. >> the "washington post", a media critic quoted cnn congressional correspondent saying well now they are really on top of us. we have to get everything right! [laughter] >> i thought that was the goal all along! >> they are watching guys! >> and if they work close
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attention the fact that donald trump's practice of working. >> there you go. all right, coming up the border wall takes a big step forward. at least that is what the voices in my head are telling me! david. what's going on? oh hey! ♪ that's it? yeah. ♪ everybody two seconds! ♪ "dear sebastian, after careful consideration of your application, it is with great pleasure that we offer our congratulations
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it's simple, so she can understand the details and be sure she's getting the right mortgage. apply simply. understand fully. mortgage confidently. >> it is the call for the border wall. the us customs and border protection agency has announced plans to begin construction of prototypes in san diego later this summer. people are already celebrating. [video] >> that was fake news. [laughter] >> and officials said 4 to 8 companies get contracts with the hopes they will quote - show us what they think is possible, doable and innovative for this purpose. so what can we expect a model to look like?
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last week the president mentioned a solar panel border wall. a great idea! but why stop there? i would add windmills on top. i think it will be nice! and a dj. the point is to make the wall more than just a wall because if it is just a wall and it will be viewed as an instrument instead of a monument. i am working on my own prototype. i call this a wall of walls. these are entire walls of ken wall from wiseguys and wiseguys? [laughter] was he in the wanderers? >> greg, if you don't know - >> a great man! all right joe, i do think it is moving along? do you think it will happen? >> i think they should make the most annoyingly environmentally
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friendly thing of all time! [applause] >> i think windows are good idea, i would like a bpa free recycled material. i think -- and solar panels should be reclaimed so the american taxpayers can get something back to the $500 million wasted. [applause] >> good point! what do you think amy? is this going to happen? >> i mean, in bits and pieces, right? we will see how it goes. i do like having the superduper wall. i am concerned about the solar panels. it looks cool and maybe can pay for yourself but i have read that solar panels kill birds. not because they fly into them but because of the reflection from the solar panels confusing them and then they go in the wrong direction and i guess they start.>> that happens to
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be with women! [laughter] >> what does that even mean greg? >> i don't know, it just popped into my head. >> but i do agree it is confusing. >> i think is a great strategy. combine all of these things together, someone is going to like it. i asked i am not a big fan of the wall myself. i think there are other ways we can solve the problem. like not having as many welfare benefits, ending the drug war. it is interesting to do this solar panel thing. >> they can add prongs! >> they could do -- come and talk about this, no thanks,
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bye! >> you can just show episodes of girls. lena dunham on everything. no one will come! >> they'll have them declaring hate crimes. >> what you think? >> i am cool with it is solar panels and maybe they can reproduce the dodo. maybe you can come back to see an extinct species. >> maybe some diorama. -- >> make it into an attraction! >> at that we were doing and - a repel? >> the wall, we can talk about it for the next eight years and not the one solar break up. and it will still not go. and not a solar rick! just throwing some ideas out there.
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>> solar bricks! coming up, does the right protest better than the left? i think that they smell better. so let me ask you this... how does diabetes affect your heart? it doesn't, does it? actually, it does. type 2 diabetes can make you twice as likely to die from a cardiovascular event, like a heart attack or stroke. and with heart disease, your risk is even higher. you didn't know that. no. yeah. but, wait, there's good news for adults who have type 2 diabetes and heart disease. jardiance is the only type 2 diabetes pill with a lifesaving cardiovascular benefit. jardiance is proven to both significantly reduce the chance of dying from a cardiovascular event in adults who have type 2 diabetes and heart disease and lower your a1c. jardiance can cause serious side effects including dehydration. this may cause you to feel dizzy, faint, or lightheaded, or weak upon standing. ketoacidosis is a serious side effect that may be fatal.
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sit in without weirdos. the protest with polite people and people who base. >> they shouted out build a wall and shoves my drink at me. all of those in the back were laughing.>> so she burned the place to the ground! anyway end of story. i'm kidding! they are plotting the joke, not the arson. [laughter] >> 50 trump supporters showed up at the store for a peaceful sit in. the eight jokes and brought coffee! >> at first it was a little tense but as more and more people ordered coffee the mood lightened up. >> he was saying even though you gave them the name trump, they put on the coffee.
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>> yes they did! >> having fun and being smart about it. compared to what we have seen in the past on the left like this black lives matter protest during brunch. [video] >> that ruined the food. anyway! it did not look like fun for either side. starbucks apologize but is too late. i decided to start making my own coffee at home. [applause] [video] >> sometimes i have problems. [laughter] >> this is how you do it. you show up and you pay, you do not show up and lecture. >> i mean it doesn't get any
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better than that. i hope that the guy that for the people there - well i am going to be back. -- you know they made a great point and you respect that and understood why.starbucks apologize and you know, well done. they could have went and thrown rocks and chanting and all of that but it was not necessary. that is a great protest. >> time are using an evolution in the right, becoming confident and taking it to the left with humor and doing these things that they never would have done before, i believe? >> in some cases. i think there are some people, i do not like this is that there trump supporters, i think people are good at tics and maniacs. the people on twitter that just tweet horrible things all the
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time. i don't think those are people so much as nightmares. but in terms of, i know lots of people that support trump but you know i'm a little more nuance on every politician to exist. but they did it starbucks was like he said, absolutely perfect.if you're trying to try and show us someone else was -- into an effective tool is to not look like a work -- yourself. a lot of these college campuses, they don't understand that detail. >> i give them a lot of credit for being so polite. but i have to say shouting is really fun! [laughter] >> that is a great fun! a lot of this stuff is energizing. and - >> it is so much fun! i protested about monica lewinsky around the white house and it was a hoot! but i would also remind people that you know the tea party. they will go to washington
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d.c. and pick up the litter behind. it was so great. and do you remember the rebellion during the recount in 2000? all of these republicans in florida went to break down the doors of the recaptures. it was so cute! >> yes it was technically trolling someone on twitter for no reason at all, right? i was told by her on twitter the other day for no reason. like saying that i love maroon 5 in getting people to sing songs. >> i had to get joan here for you. >> i was actually shamed for wearing a gary johnson for president t-shirt and nothing else. what are they going to do if the protesters turned ugly? are they going to stab them with art history diplomas? they must be dealing with people that are kindhearted. >> he said diplomas! he didn't even make it! [laughter] >> it shows it there are people
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that demonize the well-behaved people. next time you hear them saying they are all racist, no, they are people that showed up and behave themselves when it mattered. >> and a copy of someone else, i'm pretty sure approximately zero world events ever happened because someone spilled coffee on another person in a vengeful manner. >> the final thoughts, next! if you leave no i am -- recommended dulcolax. use dulcolax tablets for gentle dependable relief. suppositories for relief in minutes. and dulcoease for comfortable relief of hard stools. dulcolax. designed for dependable relief.
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beneful grain free is so healthy...
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oh! farm-raised chicken! mmm...that's some really good chicken. i don't think i've ever tasted chicken like this. what!? here come the accents. blueberries and pumpkin. wow. that was my favorite bite so far. not even kidding. i mean that was... ...oh! spinach! mmm. that's like three super foods. pretty, uh, well...super. now i got kind of a pumpkin, chicken thing going on... ...whoop! time to wrestle. (avo) new beneful grain free. out with the grain, in with the farm-raised chicken. healthful. flavorful. beneful. greg: i have 30 seconds. if you want to see tyrus you have to watch it glow it's a great tv show on netflix. if you want to see kat watch the specialist and maybe they'll be talking about a new book. [laughter] if you want to see joe, go to where he's performing and if you
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want to see amy, look her up, she is on the prowl. [laughter] >> a brand-new hour of america's news headquarters. i'm jillian. top in the necessary, president trump is honoring our nation's of veterans and marking his first fourth of july in office. he's escalating his view with the main street media turning into a knockdown drag out fight. >> all this is thousands of protesters have been taken to the street nationwide. they're demanding that congress impeach president trump. some lawmakers are joining the call to remove trump from

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