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tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  April 6, 2019 10:00pm-11:00pm PDT

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gutfield is coming up and i'll also extremely shocked there's see you next saturday night. any corruption in chicago politics. that's what shocks me the most greg i'm blown away by that. >> i don't think i could look at the city the same again. but the great thing is he plays himself in the movie. it's sick. >> it's called a bad guy movie. >> this guy is playing chess, man he's moving into the big deal with this thing. >> and hi will be rewarded for >> you probably remember the basics about the mystery case it i bet you by the end of it he and why it is so mysterous, but will be a bigger star and get work because of it. >> i think you should say this also, still, slowedded in was entire performance art. it's a long play like you said. mystery so this is important now when it comes to the mystery it's the entire, because there's no other way out. case, right? >> so now she's even mocking he's like the guy at the end of fargo where he's crawling out herself. the window and the guy is >> [laughter] pulling him back in in his under pants i don't know why i >> [cheers and applause] remember that. >> [laughter] >> up next, trump, the border, and avocados, which is a berry, >> well it was either a bad by the way. >> [applause] when you rent from national... week for joe biden, or kind of a bad week for joe biden. here he is discussing the recent
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it's kind of like playing your own version of best ball. controversy about his hands. because here, you can choose any car in the aisle, even if it's a better car class than the one you reserved. so no matter what, you're guaranteed to have a perfect drive. >> [laughter] got to admit he is adorable when [laughter] he's excited but let's get to the part where he talks about his problem. >> just as support and (vo) go national. go like a pro. encouragement that i've made to women and some men and i've made see what i did there? them uncomfortable and i never thought of politics as cold and i'm always talking about connect ing with people and as i said shaking hands, hands-on the shoulder, a hug, an idea that i can adjust to the fact that personal space is more important than its ever been is just not think about. >> now if this would have been better if he was wearing sat in pajamas, and maybe smoking a pipe. >> [laughter] >> but there you go he admits it but he doesn't apologize. he just refers to the changing
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times. >> social norms begin to change and they're shifted and the boundaries of protecting personal space have been reset and i get it. i get it. >> he gets it. >> [laughter] >> see, joe seems to remember a special time or a special place when it was okay to sniff hair and touch noses with strangers you just met. i think we have a name for it. the dog park. >> [laughter] >> [applause] >> so that gives me a possible solution for joe in this era of self-identification. if everyone these days can choose their biology, their race , their gender why not choose your species if people can identify as a different race why can't joe identify as a dog? right? >> [laughter]
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>> bill clinton did for most of his life. and there are those who have already blazed a trail for joe, like this. for a simpler life what man has transformed himself into a goat. he lives as a goat, but why would anyone go to such lengths to be a goat? i suppose it was because it would be fairly difficult, depressive and just stressful being a human being. >> so be a goat. be a goat he's not alone there's a whole group of people who now identify as other beings. >> you don't see that on special report. >> [laughter] >> or do you? so there is your solution. joe, you're a golden retriever.
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>> [laughter] >> so it's not all bad for the guy because even though there were seven accusers the accusations weren't about anything sexual. it was just weird, personal space stuff and joe's already joking about it. >> he gave me permission to touch him. >> [applause] >> [laughter] oh, man why does every kid he hugs look like a hostage? >> [laughter] >> and if you look at the faces of those he hugs they appear to be the opposite of comfortable. they look like they're getting a wet willie from a banana slug, but maybe that's what the country needs, right donny? >> it's a weird irony to this thing about him hugging people and once again obviously we're not talking about people's space but the essence of what's behind you know him personally, is the genuineness of what a hug is and let's not lose sight of we all this country needs that right now. not invasion of space but a heart-felt hug.
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>> so the country needs an old creepy guy to give it a hug from behind. >> [laughter] >> all right, donny. the creepiness is contagious but many, joe, truly appreciates the human form or maybe he assumes they appreciate his human form because it could be ego. he's making them feel special by feeling them in a special way, but like joe's hands at least this issue is out in the open and you know that it's open out in the open when trump retweets show. this meme. ♪ ♪ >> i shake hands i hug people, greg: the border closing is and i grab men and women by the near. give or take a year. shoulders and say that you can president trump adjusted his threat to close large sections do this, and it's the way that of the border giving mexico a i've always been and the way one-year warning. i've tried to show that i care. but first, i wonder, do we love >> okay the best part of this mexico? >> we love mexico, we love the is the hysterical self-riotous country of mexico. we have two problems. press rushing to tell us idiots we have the fact that they allow people to pour into our country, that this video, it was doctored and the other problem is drugs. it's not real. >> this president is always looking for a detour down into massive amounts of, large -- the dirt, and today, he was most of the drugs, much of the
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drugs coming into our country taunting the vice president on come through the southern twitter with a message, welcome border. greg: so trump wants mexico to back, joe, and a doctored video pinned to his feed that has stop the drugs and stop the caravans or he'll put tariffs on special effects to make the former vp look like a predator. cars, and if that didn't work, he'll close the border. >> so wait wait wait you're and he will do it. telling me it's doctored? >> and i will do it, just >> [laughter] like -- [laughter] >> i never would have known. i don't play games. you mean, when joe biden snuck greg: i don't play games. up behind the other joe biden to so why did trump go from we're give him a back rub? going to close the border to that's not real? maybe in a year? you mean, there aren't two joe one here to arely -- theory? bidens? >> [laughter] >> thanks, media. avocados. prices spiked on word that a i anxiously await cuomo and border shutdown was imminent. friends when they tell us that this is a doctored photo too. people love their avocados. do you have any idea what life >> [laughter] would be like in a world without >> or this one. avocados? >> [laughter] ♪ ♪ >> and this one. >> imagine a world where everything you love gets taken from you in an instant. >> by the way that is not imagine a world without doctored. anyway, biden hit back on avocados. twitter, so now we have two guys first, without avocados, avocado in their 70s in a twitter battle toast is nowhere to be found
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, life is good, if that's around the country. your headline. out of rage, all women named and what is nancy's solution for joe's creepy rubs? rachel start violently kicking >> just pretend you have a cold the crap out of women named and i have a cold. britney. >> [laughter] makes sense. but imagine republicans telling [laughter] the problem? everyone who consumes it gets a a young woman next time someone tries to grab you just tell them that you have the flu. 72-hour case of the most explosive diarrhea. also say you should wear a with the public distracted, longer skirt and a head scarf. maroon five, coldplay and it's kind of weird it's on you to fake an illness to escape the radiohead release the worst weirdness but it got us thinking album of all time. maybe there's a way to stop that north korea interprets the album guy always trying to invade your as a sign of aggression and personal space at work. always trying to give you a back immediately launches the nuclear arsenal against the rest of the rub in and there must be some world. america and its allies kind of product for that. retaliate, and the age of thermonuclear war begins. earth is left in a. >> ruled of chaos and -- shroud >> profits for the first of chaos and despair, all quarter of 2019 have never been because trump cut off your higher, costs are down, customer satisfaction is through the roof access to avocados. , and it's all because of this message brought to you by big avocado. the people that they are so [cheers and applause] proud of you. greg: i'd like to welcome our >> do you know someone at work who often gets a little too new sponsor, big avocado.
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>> yes. touchy feely? greg: yeah. they're going to -- and, kat, it's not sexual but not exactly you wore the avocado dress. appropriate either. you're uncomfortable and have thought about saying something >> on purpose. >> way to step up, kat, nice but you really like the dude so you say nothing. job. greg: it's kind of sad that a well now you don't have to major source of concern for the introducing the ultimate touchy media are the avocados. feely preventer, the >> a lot about this is sad, highly advanced technology yeah. that is sad. my views on the wall have contained in the ultimately nothing to do with avocados, touchy feely preventer spikes guaranteed the friendly its will i'll just say that. struggle to make contact with greg: okay, that's good. your body plus they're super >> i don't -- and i don't like talking about the wall on this comfortable so you never have to show, obviously, because i be uncomfortable again and if disagree with everybody about the wall. you act now we'll throw in our and then i have some old grandpa all new anti-hair sniffing tweet at me, like, your boobs helmet totally free. are small. which i -- [laughter] which i really appreciate, because if you didn't tell me, available at kmart. how would i know? greg: is it all grandpas? >> [applause] >> it's always grandpas, and you >> let's welcome tonight's look at their profile, it's like guest. he could have been big but instead he was rich. singer and songwriter john rich. loving husband, grandpa, and they're always holding a picture >> [applause] of a baby. >> he's handled more rolls than can someone check on that baby? [laughter] a baker on meth, and then actor the free exchange of nonviolent
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people across borders, but they don't get free stuff either. nick. she's got more tasks than a tuba greg: that's the eternal conflict. you have to make sure the has brass. container for the free stuff is >> [applause] a container, because if you have >> and he's both big and rich an influx of people and free former wwe super star, massive stuff, then the country goes to pieces. i have a theory, tyrus. psychic, host of fox nation. >> [applause] >> tyrus, nice to meet you. >> all right, john, is all of [laughter] greg: i am on so many this stuff helping him or medications right now -- >> yeah, okay. i know he is. hurting him? he gave me a compliment at the >> well first of all i don't get to do your show very often beginning of the show. he said i was rich. but you invite me on hair sniffing week so of all of the [laughter] greg: this is the eternal weeks. struggle between the adult and it could help him because, i the child. all that trump's talking about mean, as kind of a songwriter are these long-term solutions to guy, i thought wow what a great these problems that keep coming slogan and phrase this could be back. like, you know, or crisis, no for his presidential run. crisis. but he's saying long term we've joe biden, really in touch with got to fix this. that's an adult kind of mean the american people. >> [laughter] parent answer, and everybody else is like, ooh, like it could work for him. >> that is a great t-shirt for children. >> you know, i'm not really sure him. you should actually send that to what the question was in there, him. >> maybe i will. but i'm going to try it anyway. >> you might save his campaign, [laughter] this has a lot to do with the mueller report. i think the pressure of that is
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so nick, who did this? over, and he's able to get back i mean, everybody, he blamed the to being -- right wing trolls. greg: interesting. well no we don't care. >> -- a president. and he gets upset, and he a >> no. >> we don't care. makes -- i will close the border we probably wouldn't want to run tomorrow. against biden or maybe we won't. greg: yeah. >> excuse me, mr. president, you this has the fingerprints of who can't do that, not a good idea. >> well biden has been famous greg: yeah. >> we'll give you a year. for this for years. he's been swimming naked in [laughter] because he's listening to front of his female secret advisers. greg: yeah. service agents for years. >> he's being the adult in the room where he says an idea and the only reason it's happening now is because the democrats are then, really, if we gave them a trying to take him out. >> right. year, maybe give tariffs, these >> but the best thing about it are good presidential decisions. is the jokes. i mean there's a hashtag on and on the five yesterday when you were out sick, he was on the twitter, biden a song, it's just border, and he was doing a the best. you can't get enough of it. little speech, and he handed it he stopped sniffing hair today. over to a woman named gloria, and she laid -- i mean, she just >> [laughter] >> oh, wow. >> you can't, you know? >> i hate myself for rubbing laid it out. she's in the trenches, she's explaining all this stuff with ill gration, and i was like, you. >> [laughter] >> you can't stop. damn -- immigration. one smiled and agreed with her. >> kat, do you have any songs? >> no, no songs i have thoughts i wanted it in slow motion, my first thought when i saw this because people respect feet on happen was if any creepy old man the ground, facts and the adult ever tried to sniff my hair, the in the room. and the reason why they're pushing avocados is because
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joke would be on them because almost none of it is my hair. mainstream media's still a bunch >> which is of bitch ass babies, they just don't want to let it go. what i was going to recommend greg: bitch ass babies. this is one of those situations >> hey, dot.com. where no one is really super [laughter] >> that's a duet. right like making women greg: you know what i love about uncomfortable, never good. this story? at the same time we can't, we shouldn't cancel some old guy, it's that aspare gas comes from because he likes sniffing hair too much so what he should do is mexico, but nobody gives a do what i do and just buy the damn -- [laughter] because they're so freaking stranger's hair at the store. >> exactly. gross. >> i love as par gas. >> because that way, when he finds himself about ready to sniff the strange hair that is asparagus. >> little bit. still attached to the stranger, greg: the asparagus tastes he can just go into his pocket, funny. >> you can't makes a par if gus he's already got some stranger's hair right there and take a toast. greg: it's all stalk. sniff i've got store no fun. >> hey, listen -- recommendations he can buy many [laughter] no avocados coming across the many tracks if he wants to and border in exchange for no just carry with him everywhere fentanyl, i make that swap any he goes that's, i'm sorry i just day, anytime, you know? gave the democrats hell on fox [cheers and applause] news. >> she's got a slogan and a make a decision. place to sniff hair. can i play you sound on tape of
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greg: what do you think, nick? joe talking about what might >> i've got an avocado tree in happen next and get your comments? >> sure let's do that. my backyard, so i don't care. [laughter] >> do you expect a lot more but i did want to see if he could close the border like people? >> well i wouldn't be surprised that. i thought we'd been arguing about that for two years now. when i've had hundreds and hundreds of people contact me, he can just do it like that? greg: i think the entire border and i don't know, and say the crossings would shut down, the exact opposite. i'm sorry, i didn't understand legal -- >> port of entry, yeah. >> i don't think it would be a more. i'm not sorry for any of my bad idea. intentions. greg: i did. i'm not sorry for anything that i'm a somebody. i've ever done. somebody who hates asparagus. i've never been disrespectful, up next, another day, another intentionally. >> intentionally. person in a maga hat getting unintentionally how about all over the place. >> you've got a serial touchist grief. stick around. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ ♪ >> exactly. run with us >> do you know what? in the unstoppable john deere gator xuv835, i love the fact that he made a joke. i didn't love the fact that because when others there was kids on the stage when take rain checks... he made the joke but if you make we take the wheel. a joke about being creepy please run with us. don't have children present. search "john deere gator" for more. >> there goes my career. >> oh, yeah, but the part about this whole thing and he touched about it is democratic parties they couldn't open an umbrella
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together if they tried. they just don't get it. joe biden being in the race is a good thing for you guys for the so-called narrative new and run with us. improved democrat you want can we talk? running. if they can beat him in the we used to play so beautifully together. primaries. >> yeah. >> they beat a battle-tested now we can barely play anything... vice president and maybe, maybe, even cards with the girls. if you have bent fingers, and can't lay your hand flat, they would have a chance against talk to your doctor. the monster that is trump, it may be dupuytren's contracture. because if you told president trump oh, he's touching people, your hand is talking. isn't it time you listened? he would like a hand and while there are nonsurgical options. they're telling him they would take the first step. and learn more about dupuytren's. do this while talking. >> [laughter] at factsonhand.com >> so think about who you're going up against. ♪ >> it's a good point. but good reminder for not doing the democratic thing and stepping out. >> but the only thing is two jushis local miracle ear t at helped andrew hear more of the joy in her voice. weeks ago didn't he apologize just one hearing test is all it took for him for the white male heritage or something like that so he is to hear more of her laugh... and less of the background noise around him. still apologizing just not very bright. i think it's safe to say. for helen, just one visit to her local miracle-ear is all it >> i think he's mad and i think took to learn how she can share more moments with her daughter. he has a team of, people advising him you'll have to just one free hearing test could help you hear more... apologize. instead of saying what he wants to say is so i touched a few laughter...music...life...
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pemex ex so i loved a little too call now for your free hearing test from an industry leader: much am i wrong? >> yes. yes, joe you are. miracle-ear. >> [laughter] >> if hugging people is wrong, i don't want to be right. >> that's another slogan. parts of me i didn't even know. i find out i'm 19% native american, >> we're helping him. specifically from the chihuahua people. >> i have a songwriter's gift. what?! that's... i find that crazy. he gave me a hat as a gift. it traces their journey in the mid-1800s >> it's rubbing off on you oops from central mexico to texas. learning about the risks they took for a better life... can't say rubbing off. >> nope. ...it gives me so much respect and gratitude. >> all right the gutfield monologues live is back here is it just shed so much light in my past that the upcoming schedule may 4 i never even would've known was there. tulsa, oklahoma may 5 dallas and 20 million members have connected to a deeper family story. may 6 midland, texas special order your kit at ancestry.com. guest, go to ggutfield.com for ticket information. up next chicago wants their money back, jussie says no way this story never gets worse, only better. >> [applause] (mom vo) we fit a lot of life into our subaru forester. (dad) it's good to be back. (mom) it sure is. (mom vo) over the years, we trusted it to carry and protect the things that were most important to us.
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me, she turned to the starbucks audience and said, hey, everybody, come here. this guy's a racist. greg: turns out the woman also went on facebook and wrote about ♪ the incident too saying she called the whole starbucks to ♪ yell at the man in the hat about hating brown people and that she was sad because she was the only one who did. then the backlash came against her. people started calling her place of work, a music store. the store fired her because bullying someone you disagree with isn't their thing. >> we've always felt that griffin was the equivalent of kind of a musical town square for the community, and we welcome people of all views. greg: that's my kind of place. right, jeff? ♪ we're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wiz a ard of oz. [laughter] greg: did everybody or else see
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what i just saw? because i am on medications. [laughter] all right. i'm going to go to tyrus, because you are wearing a hat. aside from john, but you're wearing a new hat. >> i like hats. greg: i'm not wearing hats, because why would you cover this? [laughter] >> yeah. sometimes you just gotta own it. [laughter] greg: so this person basically tried to destroy this other guy, this guy's life, tried to galvanize a mob, and she was disturbed she couldn't, and then she goes to social media to create another mob, and she vows >> they say he staged the to destroy him. i think she should have been attack and they want their money back. fired. chicago, the city, not the band, >> yeah, i think they made the right choice there. will sue jussie smollett, to get back the cost of investigation she's obviously not good at decision making. like, hey, let's get 'em, guys. that allege ed attack. i don't know what i just said. hey, guys? seriously? they say the attack never of. [laughter] you know what? happened. i struggle with the maga hat a lot because, unfortunately, there's a small group who do prosecutor's office and the city gave them wear it for those reasons. until thursday to pay 130 grand but if i see somebody wearing a
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maga hat, i'm usually focused on civil suit and his my own day, and unless they've attorney says his client will be got a torch and a pitchfork, but intimidated into paying meanwhile chicago police are calling for city prosecutor kim an old man who feels the hat says make america great again, i fox to resign. >> the problem is she's not don't have an issue with that. listening to the law enforcement the image of the hat does need officials she's making decisions to be cleaned up a little bit. about policies and about public at some point maybe mr. president said if you wear this policy, without consulting the hat because you've got hate, law enforcement, and in this it's not for you. this is about america, bringing county. >> charming man. us together, that would change kim fox says she's not going things. but there's this wonderful thing. if you have a question, you see anywhere, so all sides are dug that old man and judgementing by in no one is giving an inch his interview, he looks like he which means we'll have something to talk about all summer, and i can talk a little bit, why do have to go to you, nick, because you wear that a hat, sir? you're in hollywood. because we need to get all the >> yes. >> you are. brown people out of here, then let's get 'em, guys, and does anybody there, like off the record when they're not like everybody goes with him. [laughter] being chased by tmz, actually >> that's right. greg: yeah. ask first. >> investigate! believe anything from jussie smollett? greg: ask first, then mob. >> no. >> lynch mob, investigator. i don't think so and my friends two things that never went and i we're beginning to think that it's a more elaborate hoax together. greg: nick, i think that a lot of this is due to the media. than just jussie. i don't think the hat -- the
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media was incredibly successful like everybody is in it, the in turning that hat into a mayor everybody like some hoax symbol. and that pretty soon, jussie is that was -- first, it was a positive symbol -- exactly. going to unzip the suit and andy greg: make america great, how can -- but then the media attached it to these other coffman was alive the whole time things, and now you can't get it it's a complete setup, because out of there. >> and that's what gave this its gotten so ridiculous and it woman the idea that she had the keeps snowballing and ram right to speak this way to this man because it's been tarred as a racist symbol, and that everybody who wears the hat is emmanuel is trying to look good some kind of a racist. and i think the whole thing is and that's not true. completely setup from every but she, and, you know, in her party. way, her self-righteous way, she >> jussie unzips it and it's bb thinks is she has the right to treat people that way. and i think the maga hat now stands for make [bleep] get fire cooper >> so many mysteries. again. ♪ [applause] greg: john, what is it about -- >> so many mysteries. we're seeing this a lot -- just >> [laughter] i'm joking here, okay, so let's people kind of regressing into say that you're jussie smollett an infantile state. 's agent and you haven't like, if that was your parent, resigned yet so what path would you would be ashamed if your
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you tell him to take? parent did that. your parent tells you not to do >> pay him! get on with it. that. >> yeah. i mean, starbucks is owned by but you caused this. who? you're not being, do you see >> howard schultz -- >> and he's running for -- gregg: yeah, president. >> possibly. that? and i'd like to see him make a that's exactly it you make definitive statement one way or 126,000 an episode so you work the other how you're supposed to for a day and 15 minutes for treat people in your store. this is in his coffee shop, i'd free. pay it so this can go away. like to hear what he has to say you did this, like this isn't, about it. gregg: but the girl didn't work he was not cleared of these this, right? charges, they made a deal and >> she worked in a record store. they sealed it. he got a little help on the again, two places -- inside and then he came out and [inaudible conversations] >> record stores and coffee gave that ridiculous speech i shops are not where you enlist wouldn't be my mommas son if i people for a lynch mob. [laughter] was a blah blah. you've got to go to the gym, you know what i'm saying? or a bar. you don't go into a record store and say, guys, let's get pay! you want the u back, you better somebody. , no it's going to scratch my pay that fine and move on. >> [laughter] elbow. >> that's a costly you, or yeah greg: i can just like anybody who says let's get 'em. , u, or e. even if i find somebody i don't i don't know, cat. like, i'm not into the mob what would you say are the odds thing. >> right. of him paying? well, it's interesting because >> he's not going to for a being a 30-year-old woman, i've reason which look, i actually seen a lot of hats.
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found myself being a little greg: five years ago. >> i've seen a lot of hats. jealous of him. >> really? >> in this situation, yes, hear i'm exactly 30. that's what's known at age me out hear me out. >> we're listening. shaming which affects women more >> because everyone in the than men. world knows that he's lying, and [laughter] >> let's get him. >> let's get him. yet he's not paying, because he still thinks this is going to [laughter] [applause] >> but i could never imagine not turn out fine. if i just keep telling everyone liking a hat so much that i i didn't do it then everyone is actually say a something about going to have my back. it, and i have seen dudes i mean, he has the world walking around in those fbi, crumbling around him in a giant storm and he is still in the female body inspector hats. [laughter] so if i can see a dude walking middle of it like i'm a star and around in one of those hats, she it's all going to be fine. i would love to have that kind can calm down. this is america. we let all adults dress of self-confidence, greg. >> you're sounding like one of themselves, like even carrot top your old relationships. can dress himself. this is one of your old and if shement wants to dress relationships isn't it? the dude is crumbling around all someone else, she should just, around you everyone is like cat like, have a baby like a normal leave him and you're like no person. he's a star. that's why people have baby it's okay. >> it's kind of like how i withs, i don't know. leave my fake eyelashes on for is that why you had kids? days after we film because i >> i like clothing power. feel like i get eye lash dismore greg: clothing power. any a? i hate crocs, i hate leggings -- we wait until every little last >> leggings are pants. lash has fallen off that is how greg: no, they're not. >> yes, they are pants. i also approach a relationship.
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>> so this is a relationship tbrg tbrg this is a preview of story? >> well it could be but you can an hour special we're doing on lie to yourself if that's what fox -- >> brit hume's on that. you mean but i, i tend to see greg: underwear or pants? the worst in situations not >> pants. better. >> i am a little grossed out by greg: underwear. >> pants! the decaying eyelashes. >> yeah, did you say you have greg: underwear. look, i don't need to see everybody part of somebody's body when i'm at the airport. rotting eyelashes? >> they're synthetic. >> you don't need to look at everybody's body when you're at the airport! scientists made them. >> oh, no, kat, that's size >> thank god for that, john, okay here is a question. shaming, he has no choice! i can't believe i'm going to he's standing there and somebody defend jussie smollett on this, walks by in leggings, that's all but my problem with civil suits in his face. is that you can punish somebody i'm sorry, it's not his fault. after they've been found not guilty which is what happened [laughter] [applause] greg: up next, why are americans with oj, and i love that like having less sex? having less sex? i they're punishing oj, because they killed those two people even though he got up i'm just wondering that can happen to anybody right? >> i honestly think he's probably got this master plan where the longer he carries this out he's setting up for the jussie smollettoff coming down m
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♪ greg: we're taking a vacation from copulation. a new survey finds that nearly one in four adults haven'ted had sex in the past year. that's more than any year since 1989, the same year phil collins was at the top of the charts. ♪ no one ever got busy with phil playing in the background. [laughter] but now a large portion of the sexless are 20-something men. in the last decade, the share of dudes under 30 reporting no sex has nearly tripled. for women, not so much. one expert says not only could it be because young people are
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likely to live at home -- let's take a look at what i was doing in my 20s. i'm greg gutfeld. all right. any theories on this, kat? >> my dad watches this show. i do not want to talk about sex! my grandma also watches this show and my grandpa. i would like to talk about literally anything else including that one time when i had say bees and fleas in the same day. [laughter] my mom told me to never tell anybody that because she said it was gross. greg: john? >> i think she told you. greg, it takes confidence to have sex with someone else. it takes confidence to be able
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to talk to someone to the point, get to know them to the point, hopefully, that they like you enough where maybe that might happen. so if you're sitting around worried about how many people are following you on twitter or what level you're at on fortnite and maybe you didn't hit the level you wanted, your confidence is down, you're not going to go out and talk to anybody. i agree tech is wrecking people right now. they're not going out and talking anymore. i don't think they know how to communicate. greg: no, it's true. they've replaced foreplay with fortnite. laugh all right, nick -- >> not only does it take confidence to talk somebody into sex, it really takes a lot of work, and it can be really a annoying. [laughter] it can really get on your nerves. leslie and i have been married for 33 years, and it's still a real struggle. [laughter] she's just like, huh-uh. but what happens under 30, you know, it's completely out of my dem graphic, but i just want to say to all those guys out there
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that are under 30, it gets better. greg: that's a great psa. all right, tyrus, close it up for us. >> i'm concerned. [laughter] >> as you know, i like to reproduce. we've talked about that. in my to 20s it was so quick, i didn't even meet people. we had nothing else to do. it's cheap, it's free. everybody usually has fun. i think it's sad, fellas. if you say just a minute, dear, i'm not finished with my game yet, you have a [bleep] problem. [laughter] [applause] greg: that's true. >> agreed. greg: cannot dispute that. >> just a minute, i'm binge watching netflix. bro, your just a minute is some new dude's half hour. [laughter] [applause] >> that's right. >> i think we should go back to scabies. greg: how did we end up -- >> much less disgusting. greg: maybe you were right. >> why is sex disgusting?
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my parents don't watch -- >> i have no idea, because i'm not entirely sure what it is. [laughter] greg: i know what it is. >> happy push-ups. greg: it's happy push-ups. >> it starts with hair snipping, i know that. greg: all right. final thoughts up next. [cheers and applause] (vo) parents have a way of imagining the worst... ...especially when your easily distracted teenager has the car. at subaru, we're taking on distracted driving [ping] with sensors that alert you when your eyes are off the road. the all-new subaru forester. the safest forester ever. hey, who are you? oh, hey jeff, i'm a car thief... what?! i'm here to steal your car because, well, that's my job. what?
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what?? what?! (laughing) what?? what?! what?! [crash] what?! haha, it happens. and if you've got cut-rate car insurance, paying for this could feel like getting robbed twice. so get allstate... and be better protected from mayhem... like me. ♪ now kayak and opentable let you earn travel rewards every time you dine. earn points with each restaurant reservation on opentable and redeem them for hotel discounts on kayak. get started at kayak.com/diningrewards.
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visionworks can do more than the right pair of glassesat. can make you look amazing, too. get two complete pairs of single vision glasses for $59 or two progressives for $99. and choose from over 500 frames. visionworks. we're here to help you. >> final thoughts. it's the last thought. that's why it's called the final thoughts, okay? greg: don't have much time. john, thoughts? >> thanks for having me on my show. i'm really proud of my granmy rich, everybody knows about redneck riviera whiskey. ing redneck riviera.com. we support these guys, the folds of honor, so i'm proud to have that out. greg: excellent. [applause] nick? >> yes, the best of enemies opens this weekend, please go see it. sam rockwell and taraji p.
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♪ welcome to waters world i'm jesse waters a huge show in store for you tonight including president trump touring the newest section of the wall being built. diamond and silk take on joe biden groping allegation as and the author of a new tell all about view is here, whoopi versus joy it is crazy and we have a special waters words on freedom of spe mark levin will react to that. but first sean hannity is back. taking his second dip into him earlier. >> welcome to waters world.
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